Préc i s
The medium of the autoethnography became my all-‐encompassing tool for presen7ng scholarship in a meaningful and mindful way, whilst func7oning as the qualita7ve mechanism actually engaged in the process of making meaning. It is delineated by three overarching sec7ons: Qua l i ta7ve Understand ing , the Narra7ve, and the Mul7modal Ins7 l la7on. The first is founded on cri7cal theory and the second en7ty is 7tled, “Thursday with Giuseppe,” and fashions the very core of my discursive meaning, situa7ng myself in simultaneous dialogue with narra7on and self-‐reflexivity. Given the mul7-‐sensory embodiment of this scholarship, the final component took the form of a Mul7modal Ins7lla7on, tradi7onally a method to autoethnography that transforms a text into performance. I prepared a meal of gnocchi, tomato sauce, meatballs and sausages and bread, my favourite from the summer, with the guidance of my grandfather. The mergence (read: rela7onality) of dynamic and complex posi7onali7es of the reader and the author embraced the collabora7ve, fluid, and mul7-‐sensory communica7ve process of making meaning as social beings.
Method
Excerpts
E xc e r p t s
Grandpa’s Sauce:
Today we are making tomato sauce. He crushes the cube of garlic with the back of a metal fork and it oozes into the olive oil. My grandfather bows his head sheepishly, smiling to himself.
His lips curve figh7ng back a mischievous secret but I press him to con7nue in his story.
Grandpa laughs, “Ohhhhh…Sara, if you found that bit of lard in your bowl… Ohhhhh…What a treat that was!” He smiles and laughs -‐ and I
choke. I think how this piece of fat could fill my Grandpa with such exuberant joy. He was
hungry, I think to myself. I am speechless but my Grandpa remains suspended in his memory and doesn’t take no7ce. Feelings which I can’t aptly express with words find their way into the dough beneath my slender hands and I work it
with violent force.
They ate alla contadina, in peasant style: macaroni, beans, and potatoes. From their sheep, they had wool and milk, exchanged
amongst three families. Every day, a family was making cheese. My grandpa recalls his work in the fields, gathering hay. “I thank god for the
amount I found to raise my family,” he remembers. “But it was hard work, it took a physical toll.” I look at his strong, healthy body and am in awe. I hear his bowels growl and
quake as if promptly silencing my mind. Cancer – right, I think. I’d almost forgo?en. “We made wheat all by our own; father, I, Mama… we would crush the hay to make wheat. Oh how the back ached,” he sighs. He s7rs the sauce that is blood scarlet and perfectly seasoned. It is dense and thick, like gravy for royalty. I hated knowing that for Grandpa, even tomato sauce
could be a luxury.
Excerpts from “The Fusion of Food and Culture” One's culture is always cons7tuted by one's self. One's self, is expressed, by one’s culture. Our rela7onships are never completely outside the condi7ons of cultural influence. Cultures are the fundamental sources of influence and commonali7es; they are the salient sources driving our habits, rituals and norms. Through culture we emerge as social beings bound to one another by our values, beliefs and codes. Food emerges as a vital means for crea7ng connec7ons with others and with our mul7ple cultural iden77es. In a literal sense, food sa7ates our bodies nutri7onally, and is, in itself, life-‐sustaining. But it extends further than any quick summa7on of health. Food bridges the fusion of our most inherent limbic regulators. Feeding ourselves and feeding others is always inten7onal and deliberate ac7ons; it embodies the implicit, reciprocal symbiosis of mutual regula7on that fosters meaningful rela7onships.
Excerpts from “The Textual-‐Self through Cra?” Stuart Sigman wrote of ethnography as being a "framework for thinking about the world" (Sigman,"A Ma]er of Time" 354). Ethnographies are the mechanism through which we interpret our culture, and, thus, our self. Ethnographic wri7ng explores the borderlands of culture. It does not seek to separate the "otherness" of a culture or isolate "them" or "it" from our own very personal epistemologies as author. Rather it serves as a medium through which we merge cultural perspec7ves, becoming a discursive hybrid for experiencing transcultura7on. As a form of qualita7ve inquiry, autoethnography is formally defined as "an approach to research and wri7ng that seeks to describe and systema7cally analyze (graphy) personal experience (auto) in order to understand cultural experience (ethno)" (Ellis, Adams and Bochner 1). Coined by Hayano, "auto-‐ethnography" invites "the cultural study of one's own people" (qtd in VanMaanen 106, emphasis added). I entered into this approach to research propelled by an interest in how food fits within the process of self-‐iden7ty construc7on, enchanted by a culturally encoded myth of "iden7ty preserva7on" internalized from our family and cultures. The craf of autoethnography as a method for descrip7on and a mode for meaning facilitates my reflec7on on iden7ty and paints my understanding of the social world into a “cultural portraiture” (VanMaanen 1). Approaching the autoethnography by employing hermeneu7c phenomenology as the primary qualita7ve “scaffolding” to my research method, served as an important tool for crafing self-‐inquiry (Wood, Bruner and Ross 90). As we live in a fluid, social world, the autoethnography allows me a mode for engaging in reflexive social analysis and self-‐analysis. It is a method through which I can ques7on my ontology and challenge my epistemology. It is not enough to simply situate myself in my Grandfather's kitchen, donning an apron and holding a wooden spoon and expect to experience culture through cooking. VanMaanen credits "textualiza7on," as the ac7on for which the process of analysis can take place (95). Only with the aid of wri]en, textual reflec7on, might one begin the journey toward cultural understanding.
Who are you and from where does this you emerge? I was drawn toward ques7ons of personhood and autonomy, and the delinea7ons for claiming cultural “authen7city.” I sought (through ac7ve engagement of cooking with my Grandfather and journaling my reflec7ons) the tradi7ons of my Italian ethnic group, deeply founded upon food and cuisine to understand how trans-‐genera7onal, trans-‐geographical, and trans-‐cultural food memories are internalized in a construc7on of iden7ty. The elemental power of food to s7mulate our sensory modali7es (by engaging our gesta7on, olfac7on and tac7le responses) is intrinsically connected with the construc7on of meaning and memory, and ul7mately, with cultural iden7ty. Human beings engage with cuisine via a mul7modal and mul7-‐sensory evalua7on. It is this mul7faceted process that guided the methodology behind this work.
The “In/Conclusion,” A Revisita?on: Cibo Per La Mente, Food for Thought
Ul7mately, the totality of this work ar7culates an alterna7ve paradigm for understanding the self through autoethnographic reflec7on. This emergent paradigm
illustrates a re-‐imagining of the ways in which our iden77es are constructed. It posits an ar7cula7on of the con7nuity, re-‐
fashioning iden77es as inherently incomplete and emergent in cultural processes. This work is evidence to the mul7plicity of
self.
DINING, A MULTI-‐MODAL INSTILLATION. The "autoethnograph instilla7on," was intended to invite
mul7ple meanings. It was a gathering to engage as Communica7on scholars and, most adamantly, as cultural and social beings. It was a space to share cultural texts and scripts
through wri]en word, food (merging with our olfactory senses) and spoken fic7ons. VanMaanen wrote "'truth and in7macies' come from speech -‐ from live performance beyond the literary
script of an impressionist tale" (122-‐23). The mul7modal experience embodied a "revisionist form of art" and evoked
open, par7cipatory dialogue in a meaningful, cultural, celebra7on (101).
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Gnocchi meal prepared & enjoyed at Brush Alumni House
