You should hear music. If you don’t, please check your audio. Feel free to chat and get acquainted until the music stops near the top of the hour.

You should hear music. If you don’t, please check your audio. Feel free to chat and get acquainted until the music stops near the

top of the hour. This session is held 7:00-8:00 PM (EST). Once the seminar starts, please keep all comments relevant to the class topic.

Welcome to Effective Writing I – CM Welcome to Effective Writing I – CM 107 – Seminar # 7 Revision – 107 – Seminar # 7 Revision –

looking at the writing process and looking at the writing process and your final project your final project

A house without books is like a room without windows.A house without books is like a room without windows.   ~Heinrich Mann~Heinrich Mann

Books are delightful society.  If you go into a room and find it full Books are delightful society.  If you go into a room and find it full of books -- even without taking them from the shelves -- they of books -- even without taking them from the shelves -- they seem to speak to you, to bid you welcome. seem to speak to you, to bid you welcome.  ~William Ewart ~William Ewart

GladstoneGladstone

Review of Units 1 - 6Review of Units 1 - 6Unit 1: Hearing the Call to AdventurUnit 1: Hearing the Call to Adventuree

Explain your degree plan and writing concerns Explain your degree plan and writing concerns

Unit 2: The Helpers (Amulets) & Rewards (Elixir)Unit 2: The Helpers (Amulets) & Rewards (Elixir)

Explain/Illustrate how a charitable organization could be an Explain/Illustrate how a charitable organization could be an amulet or elixir in someone’s lifeamulet or elixir in someone’s life

Unit 3: Crossing the ThresholdUnit 3: Crossing the Threshold

Describe/Explain a situation that you didn’t standup & why Describe/Explain a situation that you didn’t standup & why you chose this memory and if you could change what you chose this memory and if you could change what occurredoccurred

Project: Project: Define courage, choose a historical figure/Explain Define courage, choose a historical figure/Explain -- provide specific examples to support your choice; main -- provide specific examples to support your choice; main idea/thesis sentenceidea/thesis sentence

Unit 4: Test for HeroUnit 4: Test for Hero

Analysis and responding to the Steve Glass plagiarism Analysis and responding to the Steve Glass plagiarism story in The New Republic magazine/Explainstory in The New Republic magazine/Explain

Unit 5: Overcoming More Obstacles/Facing Fear:Unit 5: Overcoming More Obstacles/Facing Fear:

Compare & contrast Liz Murray vs Murray Barr’s definition Compare & contrast Liz Murray vs Murray Barr’s definition of homelessness – explainof homelessness – explain

Unit 6: The Fire-Giver – giftUnit 6: The Fire-Giver – gift

Cause & effect writing of fire-givers in the worldCause & effect writing of fire-givers in the world

Looking ahead to Units 7 - Looking ahead to Units 7 - 1010• Unit 7: Considering the Mentor and Revising the JourneyUnit 7: Considering the Mentor and Revising the Journey

• Revise your Unit 3 project – revising vs. editing (to Revise your Unit 3 project – revising vs. editing (to discuss)discuss)

• Unit 8: The Road HomeUnit 8: The Road Home

• Writing introductions and peer review (remember all Writing introductions and peer review (remember all intros need a “thesis”)intros need a “thesis”)

• Unit 9: Paying It ForwardUnit 9: Paying It Forward

• DB reflection on the writing process & youDB reflection on the writing process & you

• Final Project: 5 paragraph essay with APAFinal Project: 5 paragraph essay with APA; you will write ; you will write for a company’s review. You will act like a life coach for for a company’s review. You will act like a life coach for an individual an individual who needs help.who needs help.

• Unit 10: Beginning a New JourneyUnit 10: Beginning a New Journey

• DB – post your Final Project – DB – post your Final Project –

• share your information; spread the wordshare your information; spread the word

Schedule your timeSchedule your time

• Make a Make a scheduleschedule for drafting and for drafting and stick as closely to it as possible.stick as closely to it as possible.

• Do not write the entire essay in Do not write the entire essay in one one sittingsitting..

• You can do it all if you begin You can do it all if you begin nownow! !

Remember the Remember the process . . . process . . . • The most common way students get The most common way students get

“lost” in the essay is by not following “lost” in the essay is by not following the process for writing.the process for writing.

• The topic, thesis, and outline have been The topic, thesis, and outline have been parts of this process.parts of this process.

• The draft and receiving feedback will be The draft and receiving feedback will be important parts of the same process; all important parts of the same process; all this work is connected.this work is connected.

• Take time to make time; create a Take time to make time; create a schedule for your work so that you can schedule for your work so that you can juggle all the responsibilities in your life.juggle all the responsibilities in your life.

• PRINT out the SAMPLE PROJECT UNIT 9 PRINT out the SAMPLE PROJECT UNIT 9

• & the PROJECT DIRECTIONS& the PROJECT DIRECTIONS

Seeking Help (amulets Seeking Help (amulets ))• Ask for help when you need it! Ask for help when you need it!

Your instructor is eager to helpYour instructor is eager to help, , but many times cannot help on the but many times cannot help on the day before a project is due day before a project is due because there is not enough time. because there is not enough time.

• Also use the Kaplan Writing Center Also use the Kaplan Writing Center as part of your writing process as part of your writing process from beginning to final draft.from beginning to final draft.

• What other helpers, resources, and What other helpers, resources, and “amulets” exist?“amulets” exist?

DraftingDrafting• Let’s look at how one student Let’s look at how one student

organized her work. organized her work.

• On the next page, you’ll see a On the next page, you’ll see a highlighted paragraph. The highlighted paragraph. The functions of each paragraph functions of each paragraph have been highlighted as: have been highlighted as:

• 1: Topic Sentence1: Topic Sentence

• 2: 2: Supporting Details Supporting Details

• 3. Closing Sentence3. Closing Sentence

A SAMPLE A SAMPLE BodyBody paragraphparagraphExample body paragraph (thesis key point 1): Example body paragraph (thesis key point 1): topic sentence, support, closing sentencetopic sentence, support, closing sentence At the outset, Internet publishing promises At the outset, Internet publishing promises

writers powerful representation from major book writers powerful representation from major book vendors. vendors. For example, many Internet publishers For example, many Internet publishers have deals with industry giants such as Barnes have deals with industry giants such as Barnes and Noble and Amazon. In exchange for shared and Noble and Amazon. In exchange for shared royalties, these booksellers list, promote, and sell royalties, these booksellers list, promote, and sell both self-published and so-called “virtual reads” both self-published and so-called “virtual reads” to their customer base (Lowell, 2005). This to their customer base (Lowell, 2005). This powerful marketing tool means that a writer can powerful marketing tool means that a writer can self-publish while having the selling advantage of self-publish while having the selling advantage of those who have waited a long time to find print-those who have waited a long time to find print-publishing acceptance. This advantage can be publishing acceptance. This advantage can be attractive, as seen in the over 59 percent 2004-attractive, as seen in the over 59 percent 2004-2005 increase in self-published and electronic 2005 increase in self-published and electronic books (Lowell, 2005). books (Lowell, 2005). As more booksellers agree As more booksellers agree to sign on for print-on-demand and e-book to sign on for print-on-demand and e-book partnerships, the reading world can expect more partnerships, the reading world can expect more authors to take this virtual publishing route. authors to take this virtual publishing route.

The Unit 9 Sample The Unit 9 Sample Project Project (note: you will need an APA title page) (note: you will need an APA title page) THIS IS THE INTRODUCTIONTHIS IS THE INTRODUCTION Sell the beloved family home because of a barking Sell the beloved family home because of a barking

neighbor’s dog?! Sounds outrageous, but that is what some neighbor’s dog?! Sounds outrageous, but that is what some people have resorted to doing to escape the “torture.” Most people have resorted to doing to escape the “torture.” Most people, at one point or another, will live next door to a people, at one point or another, will live next door to a neighbor or neighbors. And, for the most part, neighbors can neighbor or neighbors. And, for the most part, neighbors can interact with one another in a manner that is friendly and interact with one another in a manner that is friendly and cordial. However, the cordial relationships can come under cordial. However, the cordial relationships can come under stress because of a variety of situations. One such situation stress because of a variety of situations. One such situation that can turn into a problem is a dog that consistently cries that can turn into a problem is a dog that consistently cries and barks. This is precisely the problem that Tammy Smith is and barks. This is precisely the problem that Tammy Smith is having. She works full time from home and spends much of having. She works full time from home and spends much of her day on the phone, in meetings and conferences. The her day on the phone, in meetings and conferences. The incessant noise negatively affects her ability to concentrate incessant noise negatively affects her ability to concentrate and get work done. Tammy needs help, but does not know and get work done. Tammy needs help, but does not know where to begin. With the help of a “life coach,” Tammy will where to begin. With the help of a “life coach,” Tammy will improve her quality of life in terms of work and post work improve her quality of life in terms of work and post work relaxation, while also helping her maintain her relationship relaxation, while also helping her maintain her relationship with the neighbors, if possiblewith the neighbors, if possible. . By helping her to establish a By helping her to establish a goal, define the solution, and analyze the long-term effects, goal, define the solution, and analyze the long-term effects, Tammy’s quality of life during and after work hours can be Tammy’s quality of life during and after work hours can be improved.improved.  

1st BODY1st BODY paragraph: Defining paragraph: Defining GOALGOAL for your for your clientclient• To beginTo begin  her journey to a quiet, peaceful, and   her journey to a quiet, peaceful, and

productive life, the first step is to define Tammy’s goal. productive life, the first step is to define Tammy’s goal. In order to handle this dilemma the right way, Tammy In order to handle this dilemma the right way, Tammy will need to “cross a threshold” that she has not will need to “cross a threshold” that she has not crossed before. She will need to show courage, not crossed before. She will need to show courage, not only to have her needs met, but to do so in a way that only to have her needs met, but to do so in a way that preserves the relationship with the neighbor, if at all preserves the relationship with the neighbor, if at all possible. Tammy should be familiarized with the “hero possible. Tammy should be familiarized with the “hero journey” that we are all embarking on in one way or journey” that we are all embarking on in one way or another another (Campbell, 1988). (Campbell, 1988). Her job is important to Her job is important to society, in that the work she does helps improve the society, in that the work she does helps improve the lives of others; she must be able to concentrate during lives of others; she must be able to concentrate during the day to accomplish these things. Her health and the day to accomplish these things. Her health and sanity as an individual are also important. On the sanity as an individual are also important. On the other hand, as a “hero,” she should also seek peace other hand, as a “hero,” she should also seek peace with her neighbor. Her handling of this situation with her neighbor. Her handling of this situation diplomatically is an elixir, a critical component to the diplomatically is an elixir, a critical component to the well being of those involved well being of those involved (Campbell, 1991). (Campbell, 1991). In order In order to reach her goals, Tammy must first define her “hero’s to reach her goals, Tammy must first define her “hero’s journey” through this crisis; in other words, she must journey” through this crisis; in other words, she must understand the steps to the “cure” or solution.understand the steps to the “cure” or solution.

22ndnd Body Body Paragraph: Paragraph: Solution OPTIONSSolution OPTIONS• • TThe next step is to provide a definition of he next step is to provide a definition of the solution options.the solution options.   

There are four possible solutions in working to quiet a noisy dog. There are four possible solutions in working to quiet a noisy dog. First, Tammy can try talking amicably to the owners of said dog, First, Tammy can try talking amicably to the owners of said dog, formulating a plan together. By trying this solution, an attempt can formulating a plan together. By trying this solution, an attempt can be made to maintain a friendly relationship, and stop the dog noise be made to maintain a friendly relationship, and stop the dog noise before having to escalate to the next level before having to escalate to the next level (Lisaius, 2010). (Lisaius, 2010). If talking If talking to the dog owner does not yield results, the next step is to file a to the dog owner does not yield results, the next step is to file a formal complaint with the local animal control center; in this case, formal complaint with the local animal control center; in this case, Pima Animal Care Center. Pima Animal Care Center. According to Pima County ordinance According to Pima County ordinance 6.04.160, 6.04.160, excessive dog noise is defined asexcessive dog noise is defined as,“ Owning, possessing, ,“ Owning, possessing, harboring or controlling any animal or animals […] which frequently harboring or controlling any animal or animals […] which frequently or for continuous duration howls, barks, […] or makes other sounds” or for continuous duration howls, barks, […] or makes other sounds” (2010). (2010). This potential solution can involve the dog owner facing fines This potential solution can involve the dog owner facing fines of up to $500 per day if the noise is not stopped of up to $500 per day if the noise is not stopped (Pima Animal Care (Pima Animal Care Center, 2011). Center, 2011). In addition to reporting the dog and its owner to Pima In addition to reporting the dog and its owner to Pima Animal Care, the neighbor can also call the Pima County Sheriff’s Animal Care, the neighbor can also call the Pima County Sheriff’s Department and report the noise nuisance. Lastly, the final solution, Department and report the noise nuisance. Lastly, the final solution, and probably the most drastic, is for the neighbor to take legal action and probably the most drastic, is for the neighbor to take legal action against the dog owner. It is preferable that Tammy not have to resort against the dog owner. It is preferable that Tammy not have to resort to this option, since that will add more stress to life to have to this option, since that will add more stress to life to have disharmony with her neighbor. At this point, Tammy should look at disharmony with her neighbor. At this point, Tammy should look at the long-term effects.the long-term effects.

•

33rdrd BODY BODY Paragraph – Paragraph – your client’s your client’s short & long term benefitsshort & long term benefits• Now that the goal has been determined and the Now that the goal has been determined and the

definition of a solution presenteddefinition of a solution presented ,  , the long-term the long-term effects can be analyzedeffects can be analyzed .  . By establishing the goal and By establishing the goal and taking steps toward the defined solution, Tammy can taking steps toward the defined solution, Tammy can begin to enjoy a higher quality of life and be a more begin to enjoy a higher quality of life and be a more productive member of the workforce. Tammy will not productive member of the workforce. Tammy will not be faced with the bothersome and unpredictable be faced with the bothersome and unpredictable interruptions that can cause for lack of concentration interruptions that can cause for lack of concentration as a disruption to weekly phone meetings. Another as a disruption to weekly phone meetings. Another example is that without the incessant noise, Tammy example is that without the incessant noise, Tammy will have less stress to contend with, should issues or will have less stress to contend with, should issues or problematic situations at work arise. By successfully problematic situations at work arise. By successfully maintaining the neighborly relationship, Tammy will be maintaining the neighborly relationship, Tammy will be able to have an ally rather than an enemy in her able to have an ally rather than an enemy in her neighbor, which helps promote a less stressful home neighbor, which helps promote a less stressful home life, as well. Lastly, Tammy can proceed through the life, as well. Lastly, Tammy can proceed through the workday and then move onto domestic work or rest workday and then move onto domestic work or rest and relaxation at home without agitation or anger at and relaxation at home without agitation or anger at continuing to hear the neighboring dog’s continuous continuing to hear the neighboring dog’s continuous noise.noise.

CONCLUSION: 5CONCLUSION: 5thth paragraph paragraph

note: introduction/conclusion note: introduction/conclusion last part you last part you writewrite• At the end of the dayAt the end of the day, , an individual, like Tammy, an individual, like Tammy,

who works from home and is disrupted daily by a who works from home and is disrupted daily by a barking, neighboring dog can find a resolution by having barking, neighboring dog can find a resolution by having a clear goal, defining a solution to the problem, and a clear goal, defining a solution to the problem, and looking at the long-term effects of the solutionlooking at the long-term effects of the solution  . By . By taking these steps, the affected neighbor can move taking these steps, the affected neighbor can move towards ending stress and tension during and after the towards ending stress and tension during and after the workday as well as working to maintain a positive and workday as well as working to maintain a positive and friendly relationship with her neighbor. Neighbors are a friendly relationship with her neighbor. Neighbors are a part of just about everyone’s life at one point or another. part of just about everyone’s life at one point or another. With a well-planned course of action, a neighbor With a well-planned course of action, a neighbor affected by a barking dog can “cross the threshold” with affected by a barking dog can “cross the threshold” with courage and proceed to a noise-free workday as well as courage and proceed to a noise-free workday as well as quiet time for rest and relaxation. The problem of a quiet time for rest and relaxation. The problem of a barking dog will hopefully have a quick and painless barking dog will hopefully have a quick and painless resolution, but a resolution must be had. resolution, but a resolution must be had.

APA title page & reference page APA title page & reference page needed for your Unit 9 Final needed for your Unit 9 Final ProjectProject

References:References:

Campbell, J. Campbell, J. (1991). (1991). The power of myth.The power of myth. Harpswell, ME: Anchor Publishing.Harpswell, ME: Anchor Publishing.

Lisaius, SLisaius, S. (Producer/Anchor). (2010, April 7). . (Producer/Anchor). (2010, April 7). New New ordinance puts bite in barking lawordinance puts bite in barking law [Television [Television broadcast]. Tucson, AZ: KOLDNews.broadcast]. Tucson, AZ: KOLDNews.

Pima Animal Care Center. Pima Animal Care Center. (2011). (2011). Animal noise Animal noise complaint process. complaint process. Retrieved fromRetrieved from

http://www.pimaanimalcare.orghttp://www.pimaanimalcare.org

Pima County, Arizona, Code of Ordinances. Pima County, Arizona, Code of Ordinances. (2010). (2010). Excessive noise caused by animals or Excessive noise caused by animals or birds.birds. Retrieved from Retrieved from http://pima.gov/http://pima.gov/

REVIEW: REVIEW: RevisingRevising and and EditingEditing

•What is the What is the difference difference between between revisingrevising and and editingediting??

RevisingRevising

REVISINGREVISING 1. 1. Consider your target Consider your target audienceaudience

For Unit 9 – For Unit 9 –

What do the directions say? What do the directions say?

Who is the target audience for Who is the target audience for your essay?your essay?

REVISINGREVISING2. 2. Review Review the purpose the purpose for for the writing or assignmentthe writing or assignment

Look at the project Look at the project directions directions

& &

Look the sample Unit 9 Look the sample Unit 9 project in doc.sharingproject in doc.sharing

REVISINGREVISING

3. Review each body paragraph:

Check the structure – especially the topic sentences

Check the supporting sentences Prefacts =

•R= reason;•E = examples; •F = facts;•A = analogies (comparisons);•C = concrete sensory images (descriptions);•T = testimony (EXPERTS & interviews);•S = statistics (careful with stats)•Consider the writing modes to give you more options for writing

REVISINGREVISING4. 4. Review the introduction:Review the introduction:• The The introduction has two main purposesintroduction has two main purposes: :

– to draw the reader in and make him/her want to to draw the reader in and make him/her want to read more, and read more, and

– to prepare the reader for the direction that the to prepare the reader for the direction that the essay is going to take.essay is going to take.

• The introduction usually has three parts:The introduction usually has three parts:

• 1. 1. The The grabbergrabber (or lead) (or lead) consists of several consists of several sentences that pull the reader into the essay.sentences that pull the reader into the essay.2. The 2. The transitional sentencetransitional sentence (optional) (optional) connects the lead to the thesis statement.connects the lead to the thesis statement.33. The . The thesis statement is a single sentence is a single sentence that states the main idea of the essay.that states the main idea of the essay.

REVISINGREVISING5. 5. Review the conclusion:Review the conclusion: Just as every essay has a clear beginning, Just as every essay has a clear beginning,

it should have a clear ending. The last it should have a clear ending. The last paragraph, also know as the paragraph, also know as the conclusionconclusion, , should make your essay sound finished.should make your essay sound finished.

The concluding paragraph typically has two parts:The concluding paragraph typically has two parts:

• 1. The 1. The summary statement summary statement is one or is one or two sentences which two sentences which restate the thesis restate the thesis in a fresh way to reinforce the essay's in a fresh way to reinforce the essay's main idea.main idea.2. 2. The The clincherclincher is a final thought is a final thought which should create a lasting which should create a lasting impression on the reader.impression on the reader.

6. 6. What are some What are some MOREMORE tips for revising a tips for revising a

paper?paper?– Revising means “to look at [Revising means “to look at [the content] the content] again.again.

– Focus on the ideas Focus on the ideas and their expressionand their expression

– Read out loudRead out loud

– Get away for a whileGet away for a while

– Use a helpful acronym:Use a helpful acronym:

– ARMS: ARMS: AAdd? dd? RRemove? emove? MMove? ove? SSubstitute?ubstitute?

– FACT: FACT: FFit? it? AAdd? dd? CCut? ut? TTest?est?

– Use invention strategiesUse invention strategies

– Review discarded ideas (the “trash” file)Review discarded ideas (the “trash” file)

– Any other successful strategies?Any other successful strategies?

What is editing? What is editing? What are some tips for editing a What are some tips for editing a paper?paper?

• Get away for a while• Read it out loud

• Make your words work!• Check the last word in sentences. Are they working?

• Don’t be boring!

• Add variety in diction and syntax• Use parallelism• Check coherence (e.g., transitions)• Check for punctuation—under use and over use

• Don’t be “Double-Preposition Man/Woman”• Check for typos and wrong words

• Avoid lapsing into the informal first or second person in an academic paper.•Narrating your internal thought process should also be avoided. • Avoid unnecessary jawbreaker words and “triangulation strangulation.” • Other tips?

EDITINGEDITINGProofreadingProofreading versus versus Spell Spell CheckCheck

• Spell check is a good first pass of your Spell check is a good first pass of your document, but it should not be relied document, but it should not be relied on to catch every error. For example, on to catch every error. For example, spell check won’t catch misused spell check won’t catch misused words, only misspelled words.words, only misspelled words.

• The same goes for Noodletools and The same goes for Noodletools and other writing resources. other writing resources.

• They are good tools, but you must be They are good tools, but you must be the one who knows how to use them.the one who knows how to use them.

EDITINGEDITINGMisused WordsMisused Words

• HomophonesHomophones—words that sound the —words that sound the same but have same but have different spellings or different spellings or different meaningsdifferent meanings

• Homophones won’t usually be Homophones won’t usually be caught by spell check. caught by spell check.

I or eye?Its or it’s

Defiantly or Definitely? Advise or Advice?

EDITINGEDITINGA FEW ExamplesA FEW ExamplesHomophonesHomophones

• -affect vs. effect     -affect vs. effect      elicit vs. illicit    elicit vs. illicit   

• -there, their, they're -there, their, they're lead vs. led lead vs. led

• -too, two, to            may be vs. maybe-too, two, to            may be vs. maybe

• -then vs. than          principal vs. -then vs. than          principal vs. principleprinciple

• -loose vs. lose          desert vs. dessert-loose vs. lose          desert vs. dessert

• -choose vs. chose-choose vs. chose

EDITINGEDITINGDo you know the correct choice? Do you know the correct choice?

1. Most stores (except/accept) 1. Most stores (except/accept) American Express. American Express.

2. The (affect/effect) of the storm was 2. The (affect/effect) of the storm was frightening. frightening.

3. Carmen is (already/all ready) in 3. Carmen is (already/all ready) in class. class.

4. Marcus is under the (allusion/illusion) 4. Marcus is under the (allusion/illusion) that he is famous. that he is famous.

As YouAs You Edit Edit . . . . . . • Keep in mind that a sentence does not Keep in mind that a sentence does not

have to be brief to be effective; long have to be brief to be effective; long sentences can be worthwhile, too.sentences can be worthwhile, too.

• In fact, an essay’s sentence length and In fact, an essay’s sentence length and structure should vary.structure should vary.

• Some sentences should be brief and Some sentences should be brief and others should be longer. others should be longer.

• Punctuation and the “sound” of Punctuation and the “sound” of sentences should vary.sentences should vary.

• However, every word should be However, every word should be necessary.necessary.

EDITINGEDITINGParagraph -- too many short Paragraph -- too many short sentencessentences• Autism may be caused by injections. Autism may be caused by injections.

Specifically, the injections given to infants are Specifically, the injections given to infants are suspect. Booster shots for tetanus, measles, and suspect. Booster shots for tetanus, measles, and Diphtheria may contain thermasol. Thermasol is Diphtheria may contain thermasol. Thermasol is a preservative made with mercury (Tyson, a preservative made with mercury (Tyson, 2004). Preservatives are added to give the drugs 2004). Preservatives are added to give the drugs a longer shelf life. Some bodies are not able to a longer shelf life. Some bodies are not able to process mercury. This may put those people at process mercury. This may put those people at risk for developing autism at “a rate of more risk for developing autism at “a rate of more than 500%, particularly those with a familial than 500%, particularly those with a familial tendency toward autism” (Jackson, 2006, p.7). tendency toward autism” (Jackson, 2006, p.7).

EDITINGEDITINGParagraph -- too many long Paragraph -- too many long sentencessentences• It seems impossible to not see the link between It seems impossible to not see the link between

injections for children and the rise of autism in our injections for children and the rise of autism in our country. Because American children receive a host of country. Because American children receive a host of preventative inoculations such as preventative inoculations such as measles/mumps/rubella, diphtheria/tetanus, chicken measles/mumps/rubella, diphtheria/tetanus, chicken pox, and hepatitis, many experts believe the quality pox, and hepatitis, many experts believe the quality and quantity of the injections are problematic in the and quantity of the injections are problematic in the long term. With millions of dollars of profit at risk, long term. With millions of dollars of profit at risk, pharmaceutical companies are choosing to include a pharmaceutical companies are choosing to include a mercury preservative that gives these injections a mercury preservative that gives these injections a longer shelf life. Thermasol, the mercury preservative longer shelf life. Thermasol, the mercury preservative in question, leaves a residue behind in the system, in question, leaves a residue behind in the system, and in particular the nervous system (Tyson, 2004). and in particular the nervous system (Tyson, 2004). Interrupting the way the way the brain and nerves Interrupting the way the way the brain and nerves grow puts people at risk for developing autism at “a grow puts people at risk for developing autism at “a rate of more than 500%, particularly those with a rate of more than 500%, particularly those with a familial tendency toward autism” (Jackson, 2006, p.7). familial tendency toward autism” (Jackson, 2006, p.7).

EDITINGEDITINGParagraph with a Paragraph with a balancebalance

• It seems impossible to not see the link between It seems impossible to not see the link between injections for children and the rise of autism in our injections for children and the rise of autism in our country. Specifically, the injections given to infants are country. Specifically, the injections given to infants are suspect. Because American children receive a host of suspect. Because American children receive a host of preventative inoculations such as preventative inoculations such as measles/mumps/rubella, diphtheria/tetanus, chicken measles/mumps/rubella, diphtheria/tetanus, chicken pox, and hepatitis, many experts believe the quality and pox, and hepatitis, many experts believe the quality and quantity of the injections are problematic in the long quantity of the injections are problematic in the long term. Thermasol is a preservative made with mercury term. Thermasol is a preservative made with mercury (Tyson, 2004). Preservatives are added to give the (Tyson, 2004). Preservatives are added to give the drugs a longer shelf life. Some bodies are not able to drugs a longer shelf life. Some bodies are not able to process mercury and the nervous system suffers. process mercury and the nervous system suffers. Interrupting the way the way the brain and nerves grow Interrupting the way the way the brain and nerves grow puts people at risk for developing autism at “a rate of puts people at risk for developing autism at “a rate of more than 500%, particularly those with a familial more than 500%, particularly those with a familial tendency toward autism” (Jackson, 2006, p.7). tendency toward autism” (Jackson, 2006, p.7).

What questions are there about What questions are there about APA style and format? (Use the APA style and format? (Use the APA websites – I have favorites APA websites – I have favorites in doc.sharing.in doc.sharing.

ANY FURTHER ANY FURTHER QUESTIONS?QUESTIONS?

Your professors are one Your professors are one email away!email away!

Thank you for attending Thank you for attending Prof. Tara O’NeillProf. Tara O’Neill