Childrenwerechoosingtobealone.Wenoticedthechildrenwerereactinginafrustrated,angrymannerwhenanotherchildtriedtoplaywiththem. Wefocusedourattentionandenergyonusingpositivewordsandactionsinanattempttochangethispattern.

Weusednon-verbalrecognition,suchasabigsmile,afistpumpingupanddownintheair,orathumbs-up.

Thethumbs-upinthispictureoccurredwhenachildstated,"We'reallsharingtheplaydough."

Whenwesawchildrenplayingtogetherharmoniously,wenoticedwhattheyweredoingwithverbaldescriptions.

Weworkeddiligentlytokeepourdescriptionsfactualandwithoutjudgement.

"Twokidssplashintheturtle."

"Threechildrenarestandinginthetub."

"Fourchildrenareusingthepitcheratthesametime."

"Fourchildrenarecarryingthestickacrosstheyard."

"Fivechildrenareplayingwithwater,dandelions,andgrass."

Afterweusednon-verbalrecognitionsanddescriptionsforashorttime,achangehappenedinthechildren.Theywerelessfrustratedwitheachotherandbeganplayingtogethermoreoften.Andtheywereexcitedtotellusaboutit!

Onedaywhilethechildrenweredancing,oneofthemyelledexcitedly,"Look!We'realldancingtogether!"

Achangealsohappenedforthegrown-upsatZoeFamilyChildcare.Themorewelookedforpositivesinthechildren,themorejoyweexperiencedinourday.

Bothparentsandchildrenenjoyedlookingatthedocumentationposterofthisstory,too.

EzraStoker-Graham

ZoeFamilyChildcare,SeattleWA