REAL LIONS DON'T NEED TO ROAR: CAPITALIZING
ON THE UNIQUE CHARACTERISTICS THAT
WOMEN BRING TO THE WORKPLACE
CHRISTINE BUCKLEY, PMP, CISA
MY EXPERIENCES
Worked in computer industry for more than 25 years
Telephone Technical support Senior Systems Engineer at Delta Air
Lines After 9/11, I started my own business
For many of the positions I was the only woman on the technical team
MY EXPERIENCES
Moved to Seattle
Project Manager at Boeing for software development project for the 787
Currently at Microsoft working with the Unified Communications products
MY EXPERIENCES
MY PERSONAL GOAL FOR THIS EVENING
To share my experiences and lessons learned in hopes that they may help you
To give you a list of the resources I depend on to ‘sharpen the saw’
To make you laugh
"At the end of the day people won't remember what you said or did, they will
remember how you made them feel." ~ Maya Angelou
MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
When a woman says:
We Never Go Out!
What do you think this means?
MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
Let’s look at a ‘translation’ from the ‘Venusian/Martian Phrase Dictionary
When a woman says:
We Never Go Out!
She means “I feel like going out and doing something together. We always have such a fun time, and I love being with you. What do you think? Would you take me out to dinner? It has been a few days since we went out.
MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
Let’s look at a ‘translation’ from the ‘Venusian/Martian Phrase Dictionary
When a woman says:
We Never Go Out!She means “I feel like going out and doing something together. We always have such a fun time, and I love being with you. What do you think? Would you take me out to dinner? It has been a few days since we went out.
Without this translation, when a woman says “We never go out” a man may hear:
You are not doing your job. What a disappointment you have turned out to be. We never do anything together anymore because you are lazy, unromantic, and just boring.”
MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
Learn how someone communicates best and what is important to them
Men need:
Trust Acceptance Appreciation
"The best way to keep relationships happy, healthy, and supportive can be summed up in one word: appreciation. What you appreciate, appreciates. When we demonstrate our appreciation for the support we receive from others, it reinforces that behavior and deepens our connection to them.“Marci ShimoffAuthor of Love For No Reason
MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
Learn how someone communicates best and what is important to them
Women need:
Caring Understanding Respect
When a woman does not feel cared for and respected in a relationship she gradually becomes compulsively responsible and exhausted from giving too much.
MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
Men:
Take pride in solving their own issues
Talk about their problems as an invitation for advice
Doesn’t want help unless they ask specifically for help
Women:
Take pride in collaboration and team work
Talk about their problems to release them (not to ask for
advice)
Doesn’t want to ask for help – immensely enjoys when
someone starts helping without being asked
MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
Men are motivated and empoweredWhen they feel needed…
Women are motivated and empoweredWhen they feel cared for and respected…
Despicable Me – A fabulous example of successful Martian/Venutian communication skills!
MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
"Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better."
— Maya Angelou
MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN ARE FROM VENUS
www.greatday.com
THE DAILY MOTIVATOR
Your perception of yourself influences everything you do or don't do
Keep that in mind the next time you catch yourself using negative self-talk
MENTAL IMAGE
"Remember, happiness doesn't depend upon who you are or what you have, it depends solely upon what you think." ~ Dale Carnegie
"If you think you can, you can. If you think you can't, you're right." ~ Mary Kay Ash
The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another. ~ William James
"The greatest day in your life and mine is when we take total responsibility for our attitudes. That's the day we truly grow up." ~ John C. Maxwell
ATTITUDE = ALTITUDE
LIONS DON’T NEED TO ROAR
Assign your mind a positive attitude instead
Successful people are constantly aware of how they are being perceived – and adjust their actions to control their effect.
To be successful, be yourself more consciously, purposefully, and positively by:
Being aware of what you are thinking, saying, or doing at any given moment;Consciously choosing attitudes, words, and actionsAdopting new behavior patterns
YOUR EXPRESSION
"The expression one wears on one's face is far more important than the clothes one wears on one's back.“
Dale Carnegie
How to look Awake, Alert and Alive!
Relax your browRelax your jawRelax your feetSay ‘Cheese Whiz’
YOUR EXPRESSION
Smile – it is an instant energizer and makes you look younger
Keep Your Head Level (literally) – you appear more energetic and sure of yourself
Laugh – it reduces negative tension and replaces it with a positive physical reaction
Top people laugh. Their philosophy is: "If you can't change it or accept it, you might as well
laugh about it." And they laugh...a LOT.
LIONS DON’T NEED TO ROAR
LIONS DON’T NEED TO ROAR
Expect acceptance and accept others as well. Maintain an "I'm OK and you're OK too"
attitude.
Trust that everyone does their best everyday
When you choose to be pleasant and positive in the way you treat others, you have also chosen, in most cases, how you are going to be treated by
others.
LIONS DON’T NEED TO ROAR
Do you know what to do when you start to cry at work?
LIONS DON’T NEED TO ROAR
BE GRATEFUL"The more you are grateful for what you have the more you will have to be grateful for" ~ Zig Ziglar
"Living well is an art that can be developed: a love of life and ability to take great pleasure from small offerings and assurance that the world owes you nothing and that every gift is exactly that, a gift. " ~ Maya Angelou (Wouldn't Take Nothing for My Journey Now)
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." ~ Maya Angelou
BE GRATEFUL
BE GRATEFUL Keep a Gratitude Journal – a list of
what you are thankful for – be sure to review it regularly – especially on rainy days.
http://www.insightoftheday.com/quote.asp
INSIGHT OF THE DAY
"Pretend that every single person you meet has a sign around his or her neck that says, "Make me feel important." Not only will you succeed in sales, you will succeed in life."
~ Mary Kay Ash
MY OWN BUSINESS
Golden Rule Management
Enthusiasm…Moves Mountains!
Six Most Important Things List
MARY KAY ON PEOPLE MANAGEMENT
People Will Support That Which They Help Create
The Art of ListeningYou can make more friends in two months by
becoming genuinely interested in other people than you can in two years trying to get other people interested in you. ~ Dale
Carnegie
Praise People to Success
MARY KAY ON PEOPLE MANAGEMENT
http://www.mileaderonline.com/
MAXIMUM IMPACT CLUB
www.giantimpact.com
GIANT IMPACT
If you don’t tell your money where to go, you will wonder where it went.
SHARPEN THE SAW
REVIEW – BOOKS THAT CHANGED MY LIFE
Lions Don’t Need to Roar by D. A. Benton
Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus
By John Gray
Mary KayOn PeopleManagement
by Mary Kay Ash
Total Money Makeover
by Dave Ramsey
www.greatday.com
http://www.insightoftheday.com/quote.asp
http://www.mileaderonline.com/
www.giantimpact.com
REVIEW – WEBSITES TO ‘SHARPEN THE SAW’
QUESTIONS & ANSWERS