Women are Cra-CraWomen are Cra-CraMen are Dumb as a RockMen are Dumb as a Rock
She wants to heardShe wants to heardBut won't deal with the nailBut won't deal with the nail
He wants fix itHe wants fix itBut can't seem to listen firstBut can't seem to listen first
Women are a bit crazy at timesWomen are a bit crazy at times
Men are dumb as a rockMen are dumb as a rock
We're DifferentWe're Different
Married or singleMarried or singleWe deal with those DifferencesWe deal with those Differences
Every dayEvery day
We were designed andWe were designed andCreated to be differentCreated to be different
The quality of your relationshipThe quality of your relationshipWith GodWith God
Affects the quality of yourAffects the quality of yourRelationship with everyone elseRelationship with everyone elseEspecially your spouseEspecially your spouse
Adam is alone:Adam is alone:“You may surely eat of every tree of “You may surely eat of every tree of the garden, but of the tree of the the garden, but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die”eat of it you shall surely die”
The Lord God said, “It is not The Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper alone; I will make him a helper fit for him”fit for him”
So the Lord God caused a deep So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and sleep to fall upon the man, and
while he slept took one of his while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place ribs and closed up its place
with fleshwith flesh
God needs a rib?God needs a rib?Ex-nihilo CreationEx-nihilo Creation
So he's making a point…So he's making a point…
And the rib that the Lord God And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he had taken from the man he made into a woman and made into a woman and brought herbrought her to the man to the man
She is a She is a giftgift to him from God to him from God
She is She is part of him= part of him= equalequal
Then the man said…Then the man said…
““This This at lastat last is bone of my bones is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called Woman,she shall be called Woman, because she was taken because she was taken
out of Man”out of Man”
She is the giftShe is the giftHe's been waiting forHe's been waiting for
She is equal toShe is equal toAnd part of himAnd part of him
AndAnd he is a gift to her… he is a gift to her…
Because they're differentBecause they're differentThey both have strengthsThey both have strengthsThe other needs The other needs by designby design
Different:Different:- Bodies- Bodies
Different:Different:- Bodies- Bodies- Strengths and weaknesses- Strengths and weaknesses
Different:Different:- Bodies- Bodies- Strengths and weaknesses- Strengths and weaknesses- Emotional Responses- Emotional Responses
Different:Different:- Bodies- Bodies- Strengths and weaknesses- Strengths and weaknesses- Emotional Responses- Emotional Responses- Communication- Communication
Different:Different:- Bodies- Bodies- Strengths and weaknesses- Strengths and weaknesses- Emotional Responses- Emotional Responses- Communication- Communication- Ways of thinking- Ways of thinking
HER DIARY:HER DIARY:Tonight, I thought my husband Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird. We had made was acting weird. We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. drink.
I was shopping with my friends I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit upset at the fact that I was a bit
late, but he made no late, but he made no comment on it.comment on it.
Conversation wasn't flowing, so I Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we go suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much. I asked him what was say much. I asked him what was wrong. wrong.
He said, 'Nothing.' I asked him if He said, 'Nothing.' I asked him if it was my fault that he was it was my fault that he was
upset. He said he wasn't upset, upset. He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to do with that it had nothing to do with
me, and not to worry about it.me, and not to worry about it.
On the way home, I told him On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled that I loved him. He smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can't slightly, and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior. I don't explain his behavior. I don't know why he didn't say, know why he didn't say, 'I love you, too.''I love you, too.'
When we got home, I felt as if I When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely, as if he had lost him completely, as if he
wanted nothing to do with me wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there anymore. He just sat there
quietly, and watched TV. quietly, and watched TV.
He continued to seem distant He continued to seem distant and absent. Finally, with silence and absent. Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes later, he bed. About 15 minutes later, he came to bed.came to bed.
To my surprise, he responded To my surprise, he responded to my caress, and we to my caress, and we
made love.made love.
But I still felt that he was But I still felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts distracted, and his thoughts were somewhere else. He fell were somewhere else. He fell asleep -I cried. I don't know asleep -I cried. I don't know what to do.what to do.
I'm almost sure that his thoughts I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else.are with someone else.
My life is a disaster.My life is a disaster.
HIS DIARY:HIS DIARY:My Harley wouldn't start today, My Harley wouldn't start today, but at least I got lucky.but at least I got lucky.
She's going crazyShe's going crazyHe's obliviousHe's oblivious
We're different…We're different…
She is the giftShe is the giftHe's been waiting forHe's been waiting for
She is equal toShe is equal toAnd part of himAnd part of him
God makes herGod makes herAnd presents her to AdamAnd presents her to Adam
ThereforeTherefore a man shall leave his a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall fast to his wife, and they shall become become one fleshone flesh
In a healthy relationshipIn a healthy relationshipThere must be There must be
Leaving and CleavingLeaving and Cleaving
And the man and his wife were And the man and his wife were both naked and were both naked and were
not ashamednot ashamed- Genesis 2- Genesis 2
"one flesh""one flesh"
In God's original created orderIn God's original created orderThe The differencesdifferences between between Men and Women Men and Women Are their Are their strengthstrength
Perfection, until…Perfection, until…
““Did God actually say, ‘You shall Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the not eat of any tree in the garden’?”garden’?”
Misquote on purposeMisquote on purpose
““We may eat of the fruit of the We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, but God trees in the garden, but God
said, ‘You shall not eat of the said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, midst of the garden, neither neither
shall you touch it,shall you touch it, lest you die’” lest you die’”
But the serpent said to the But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. woman, “You will not surely die. For God knows that when you For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”knowing good and evil.”
At the root of all sin:At the root of all sin:"There's something better and "There's something better and
God is keeping it from me!"God is keeping it from me!"
So when the woman saw that So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, that it was a delight to the eyes,
and that the tree was to be and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise…desired to make one wise…
……she took of its fruit and ate…she took of its fruit and ate…
Division and an Division and an Impossible choiceImpossible choice
she took of its fruit and ate, and she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her she also gave some to her husband husband who was with her, who was with her, and he ateand he ate
God's Plan:God's Plan:Unity and strength in diversityUnity and strength in diversity
Sin Enters:Sin Enters:Division, shame and blamingDivision, shame and blaming
Then the eyes of both were Then the eyes of both were opened, and opened, and they knew that they knew that
they were naked. they were naked. And they And they sewed fig leaves together and sewed fig leaves together and
made themselves loinclothsmade themselves loincloths
"Where you at, boy?""Where you at, boy?"
Hiding! Hiding! Why?Why?
"I was naked and afraid""I was naked and afraid"
"Have you eaten of the tree of "Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you which I commanded you not to eat?"not to eat?"
““The woman whom you gave to The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit be with me, she gave me fruit
of the tree, and I ate”of the tree, and I ate”
Sin causes division…alwaysSin causes division…always
- Blame-shifting- Blame-shifting- Rationalization- Rationalization
When people blameWhen people blameWhen they rationalizeWhen they rationalizeThey are no different than AdamThey are no different than Adam
When people blameWhen people blameWhen they rationalizeWhen they rationalizeThey are no different than AdamThey are no different than Adam
Christ died so thatChrist died so thatWe We wouldwould be different be different
Then the Lord God said to the Then the Lord God said to the woman, “What is this that you woman, “What is this that you have done?” have done?”
The woman said, The woman said, “The serpent “The serpent deceived me,deceived me, and I ate” and I ate”
HeadshipHeadshipWho did God create first?Who did God create first?To whom did God giveTo whom did God givethe command?the command?Who did God call in the Garden?Who did God call in the Garden?
Headship is not:Headship is not:
- Better than- Better than- Privilege- Privilege- Authority over- Authority over- Rights- Rights
Headship is:Headship is:
- Representation- Representation- Responsibility- Responsibility
- Serving- Serving
"Christ is the head of the church""Christ is the head of the church"
The FallThe FallInfects and Changes Infects and Changes All our relationshipsAll our relationships
Including HeadshipIncluding Headship
The quality of your relationshipThe quality of your relationshipWith GodWith God
Affects the quality of yourAffects the quality of yourRelationship with everyone elseRelationship with everyone elseEspecially your spouseEspecially your spouse
"Your desire shall be for "Your desire shall be for (against) your husband, (against) your husband,
and he shall rule over you”and he shall rule over you”
The Fall= The Fall= Division, power strugglesDivision, power struggles
Headship gone wrong Headship gone wrong andandAttempts to subvert itAttempts to subvert it
Overbearing and abusive menOverbearing and abusive men
"Wives submit to your "Wives submit to your husbands"husbands"??
"Submit to "Submit to one anotherone anotherOut of reverence for the Lord"Out of reverence for the Lord"
Manipulative and Manipulative and Controlling womenControlling women
(Based on previous experiences(Based on previous experiencesWith poor excuses for men)With poor excuses for men)
He wants her to serve himHe wants her to serve him
She wants to change himShe wants to change him
He wants her to serve himHe wants her to serve him
She wants to change himShe wants to change him
They both want control…They both want control…She's crazy and he's dumb!She's crazy and he's dumb!
Tense, nervous environmentTense, nervous environmentDivision mars intimacyDivision mars intimacy
Not fully "one flesh"Not fully "one flesh"No longer gifts/equalNo longer gifts/equal
Fallen Headship with MenFallen Headship with Men
Women=Women=Angry and resentful (secretly?)Angry and resentful (secretly?)
Fallen Headship with WomenFallen Headship with Women
Men=Men=Scared and conflict-averseScared and conflict-averse
If you seek peace for fear of If you seek peace for fear of Conflict and confrontationConflict and confrontation
You've not sought a godly peaceYou've not sought a godly peaceBut chosen to live with sinBut chosen to live with sin
Adam's Turn…Adam's Turn…
““Because you have listened Because you have listened to to the voice of your wifethe voice of your wife……
Good men put God firstGood men put God firstEven over their wivesEven over their wives
Good women put God firstGood women put God firstEven over their husbandsEven over their husbands
The quality of your relationshipThe quality of your relationshipWith GodWith God
Affects the quality of yourAffects the quality of yourRelationship with everyone elseRelationship with everyone elseEspecially your spouseEspecially your spouse
““Because you have listened to Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I eaten of the tree of which I commandedcommanded you, you, ‘You shall not ‘You shall not eat of it,’ cursed is the ground eat of it,’ cursed is the ground because of you…because of you…
Headship:Headship:
- Based on: Order of Creation- Based on: Order of Creation- Stewardship- Stewardship- Responsibility not rights- Responsibility not rights- Protecting as God would- Protecting as God would
The FallThe Fall
Your desire shall beYour desire shall beFor your husbandFor your husbandAnd he shall rule over youAnd he shall rule over you
In Christ…In Christ…RestorationRestoration
Headship:Headship:The first man eats the fruit of The first man eats the fruit of the tree and brings deaththe tree and brings death
The second man hangs on the The second man hangs on the tree and brings the fruit of lifetree and brings the fruit of life
……sin came into the world sin came into the world through one through one man,man, and death and death
through sin, and so death spread through sin, and so death spread to all men because all sinned…to all men because all sinned…
For if, because of one man's For if, because of one man's trespass, death reigned through trespass, death reigned through that one man…that one man…
……much more will those who much more will those who receive the abundance of grace receive the abundance of grace
and the free gift of righteousness and the free gift of righteousness reign in life through the reign in life through the
one man Jesus Christone man Jesus Christ- Romans 5- Romans 5
Adam's HeadshipAdam's HeadshipCauses ruinCauses ruin
Christ's HeadshipChrist's HeadshipRestores what was lostRestores what was lost
The quality of your relationshipThe quality of your relationshipWith GodWith God
Affects the quality of yourAffects the quality of yourRelationship with everyone elseRelationship with everyone elseEspecially your spouseEspecially your spouse
Husbands, love your wives like Husbands, love your wives like Christ loved the church and Christ loved the church and gave gave himself uphimself up for her for her
Not power, but servingNot power, but serving
Wives, submit to your own Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife…husband is the head of the wife…
Not control, but responseNot control, but response
The quality of your relationshipThe quality of your relationshipWith GodWith God
Affects the quality of yourAffects the quality of yourRelationship with everyone elseRelationship with everyone elseEspecially your spouseEspecially your spouse
But…there's 2 of us!But…there's 2 of us!
And she just keeps…And she just keeps…And he won't…And he won't…
- Take ownership of your part- Take ownership of your part
- You can't control and don't - You can't control and don't own themown them
- You can let God change you- You can let God change you
Because you are one fleshBecause you are one fleshIt will change themIt will change them
Over time…as they see itOver time…as they see it
Am I trying to control? Am I trying to control? To have power? Why?To have power? Why?
How often to I look to serveHow often to I look to serveInstead of being served?Instead of being served?
Do I want to change themDo I want to change them
Or love and accept them Or love and accept them And watch God change me?And watch God change me?
The quality of your relationshipThe quality of your relationshipWith GodWith God
Affects the quality of yourAffects the quality of yourRelationship with everyone elseRelationship with everyone elseEspecially your spouseEspecially your spouse
Do I have problemsDo I have problemsWith lots of people?With lots of people?
Could it be that it's not Could it be that it's not Everyone elseEveryone elseIt's me and how I respond?It's me and how I respond?