Ymag - Window for Action Loving Professionals

Dear Readers When people come together, every student of management talks about the four stages of development – Forming, Storming, Norming and Performing. What happens thereafter? We need to get into TRANSFORMING or else we will start decaying. Before this happens in a team setting , it is vital that we take care of this in our individual setting. We need to transform consistently or else we get out dated in terms of our learning, competence and impact. We need to create ‘achchay din …’ for ourselves too instead of expecting the miracle for India. whY not? Cheers, Rajiv Khurana Editor [email protected] 9810211256.

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12 Action steps to TRANSFORMING

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4 Steps to Transforming Your Negative Self-talk into an Inner Coach

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Self-Transformation Readiness

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TRANSFORMATION - Quotes

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In this issue…

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#29 August 1, 2014

Coaching Learning Advancing Sharpening Smartening ©

Advt. Pages 11-12

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Rajiv Khurana CMC, FIMC

Acronym developed by Rajiv Khurana

T Take charge. The initiative starts from within. No one can do it from outside. Be your own leader.

R Review and revisit your personal vision and purpose. Create if not done already. Time is running out.

A

Align goals. Don’t just look at your career goals. Fix goals for your self development and health. Work out your goals for family and social life. Don’t miss out your spiritual goals. Ensure that they are well aligned and do not come in each other’s ways.

N Neutralize negativity. Kill the devil within or keep it under tight leash. Stay away from negative characters too, howsoever sympathetic they are.

S Stay close to successful people. Learn from what they have been doing right. Ask them too.

F

Forget and forgive. Move on with your life. There would always be not so generous people and situations. Avoid getting stuck with them. Opportunities of future are better and brighter than the regrets of past.

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O Open your heart for people. They also hold the key to your success. Accept them. Respect them.

R Relax and rejuvenate. Avoid the rat race. Pick and stick to your pace. Keep improving your capacity.

M

Make people successful. You are not the only God’s gift to humanity. Everyone is. They wish to be successful too. Make efforts for their success. The dividends to you would be equally rewarding.

I Initiate new learnings. Consistently improve your knowledge, attitude, skills, habits and behaviour.

N Navigate your efforts through creativity. Freshness of thoughts and actions will keep you ahead on the pedestal.

G Gear up. Transforming self is a journey and not a destination. It’s enjoyable with every change that you bring in. Be on the look out and keep pushing.

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Your thoughts have a powerful effect on you. They affect your attitude, your physiology, and your motivation to act. Your negative thoughts actually control your behavior. They can make you stutter, spill things, forget your lines or breathe shallowly. Research indicates that the average person talks to himself or herself about 50,000 times a day. According to psychological researchers, it is 80% negative; things such as I shouldn't have said that... They don't like me... I don't like the way my hair looks today... I can't dance... I'll never be a good skater..., I'm not a speaker... I'll never lose this weight... I can't ever seem to get organized... I'm always late. We also know from lie-detector tests that your body reacts to your thoughts. These physiological changes, such as heart rate and breathing rate, occur when you're lying but also in reaction to every thought you think. Every cell in your body is affected by every thought you have. Negative thoughts affect your body negatively, weakening you. Positive thoughts affect your body in a positive way, making you more relaxed, centered and alert. It is your job to control and master your thoughts. You are 100% responsible. But there is a core principle you need to understand about self-criticism and self-judgment: It is always motivated by love and has always some positive intention or positive goal attached to it. Now, this positive intention doesn't show immediately. It needs some reflection at first. But with some practice, like everything else, it comes within seconds and here comes the change. Here are four steps you will need to take to master your thoughts and to transform your inner critic into an inner coach.

4 Steps to Transforming Your Negative Self-talk into an Inner Coach -Emmanuel Segui

Article Source: http://www.upublish.info

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1. It's Time to Step Back. The first step of any strategy to change your emotions or personal history is to step back and reflect on what is going on inside of you. It is as if you were stepping back from your thinking and were looking at it. By doing this you go to a higher psychological level where change can take place. As Albert Einstein said, "The significant problems we face cannot be solved by the same level of thinking that created them."

2. Look for the positive intention. One of the most magnificent beauties of the human mind is self-reflexivity. This means that you not only think about an event, but you think about what you just thought about that specific event. It's like layers of thoughts that are formed at the back of your mind in a fraction of a second. Now, you can peel away the layers and discover the positive intention of that negative thought by asking yourself the following question: "What is the good or the positive intention of that part of me that just thought..." or "What does that part of me that just thought... wants that is good for me". Were you able to find it?

3. Feel how your emotions are changing. When you find that positive intention, you discover a whole new part of you. The part that wants you to be better, to feel better and to be everything you're capable of. That way, your self-esteem increases, you have more confidence in yourself, you trust yourself more and you achieve more.

4. Thank yourself for caring about you. Now, you're going to play the appreciation game and that is to thank yourself for the beautiful human being you are. Because you understand your unique value, your importance in the world, you can more quickly and more easily go for your dreams and live a more prosperous life. Negative thoughts happen to everybody. The difference between a successful person and another is just that he or she has learned how to master his thoughts and emotions. With these four little but powerful steps, you can beat your negative thoughts and therefore your negative emotions. You will radiate more energy to accomplish your goals and you will function more efficiently.

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There was a business executive who was deep in debt and could see no way out. Creditors were closing in on him. Suppliers were demanding payment. He sat on the park bench, head in hands, wondering if anything could save his company from bankruptcy.

#29 August 1, 2014

Suddenly an old man appeared before him. “I can see that something is troubling you,” he said. After listening to the executive’s woes, the old man said, “I believe I can help you.” He asked the man his name, wrote out a check, and pushed it into his hand saying, “Take this money. Meet me here exactly one year from today, and you can pay me back at that time.” Then he turned and disappeared as quickly as he had come. The business executive saw in his hand a check for $500,000, signed by John D. Rockefeller, then one of the richest men in the world! “I can erase my money worries in an instant!” he realized. But instead, the executive decided to put the uncashed check in his safe. Just knowing it was there might give him the strength to work out a way to save his business, he thought. With renewed optimism, he negotiated better deals and extended terms of payment. He closed several big sales. Within a few months, he was out of debt and making money once again. Exactly one year later, he returned to the park with the uncashed check. At the agreed-upon time, the old man appeared. But just as the executive was about to hand back the check and share his success story, a nurse came running up and grabbed the old man. “I’m so glad I caught him!” she cried. “I hope he hasn’t been bothering you. He’s always escaping from the rest home and telling people he’s John D. Rockefeller.” And she led the old man away by the arm. The astonished executive just stood there, stunned. All year long he’d been wheeling and dealing, buying and selling, convinced he had half a million dollars behind him. Suddenly, he realized that it wasn’t the money, real or imagined, that had turned his life around. It was his newfound self-confidence that gave him the power to achieve anything he went after. Author Unknown

Rebound A Self-transformational story

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This worksheet for assessing self-care is not exhaustive, merely suggestive. Feel free to add areas of self-care that are relevant for you and rate yourself on how often and how well you are taking care of yourself these days. When you are finished, look for patterns in your responses. Are you more active in some areas of self-care but ignore others? Are there items on the list that make you think, "I would never do that"? Listen to your inner responses, your internal dialogue about self-care and making yourself a priority. SELF-CARE CHECKLIST Rate the following areas in frequency 5 = Frequently 4 = Occasionally 3 = Rarely 2 = Never 1 = It never occurred to me

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Self-Transformation Readiness

Adopted from http://www.compassionstrengths.com

Physical Self-Care ____ Eat regularly (e.g. breakfast, lunch, and dinner) ____ Eat healthily ____ Exercise ____ Get regular medical care for prevention ____ Take time off when sick ____ Get massages ____ Dance, swim, walk, run, play sports, sing, or do some other physical activity that’s fun ____ Get enough sleep ____ Wear clothes you like ____ Take vacations ____ Take day trips or mini-vacations ____ Make time away from telephones, egroups, whatsapp, email, internet ____ Other

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#29 August 1, 2014

Adopted from http://www.compassionstrengths.com

Psychological Self-Care ____ Make time for self-reflection ____ Have your own personal psychotherapy ____ Write in a journal ____ Read literature that is unrelated to work ____ Do something at which you are not expert or in charge ____ Decrease stress in your life ____ Notice your inner experience, listen to your thoughts, judgments, beliefs, attitudes, and feelings ____ Let others know different aspect of you ____ Engage your intelligence in a new area, e.g., go to an art museum, sports event, theater performance ____ Practice receiving from others ____ Be curious ____ Say no to extra responsibilities sometimes ____ Other

Emotional Self-Care ____ Spend time with others whose company you enjoy ____ Stay in contact with important people in your life ____ Give yourself affirmations, praise yourself ____ Love yourself ____ Reread favorite books, re-view favorite movies ____ Identify comforting activities, objects, people, relationships, places and seek them out ____ Allow yourself to cry ____ Find things that make you laugh ____ Express your outrage in social action, letters, donations, marches, protests ____ Other

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#29 August 1, 2014

Adopted from http://www.compassionstrengths.com

Spiritual Self-Care ____ Make time for reflection ____ Spend time with nature ____ Find a spiritual connection or community ____ Be open to inspiration ____ Cherish your optimism and hope ____ Be aware of nonmaterial aspects of life ____ Try at times not to be in charge or the expert ____ Be open to not knowing ____ Identify what is meaningful to you and notice its place in your life ____ Meditate ____ Pray ____ Sing ____ Spend time with children ____ Have experiences of awe ____ Contribute to causes in which you believe ____ Read inspirational literature (talks, music, etc.) ____ Other

Workplace or Professional Self-Care ____ Take a break during the workday (e.g., lunch) ____ Take time to chat with co-workers ____ Make quiet time to complete tasks ____ Identify projects or tasks that are exciting and rewarding ____ Balance your caseload so no one day or part of a day is “too much” ____ Get regular supervision or consultation ____ Negotiate for your needs (benefits, pay raise) ____ Have a peer support group ____ Develop a non-trauma area of professional interest ____ Other

The most authentic thing about us is our capacity to create, to overcome, to endure, to transform, to love and to be greater than our suffering. - Ben Okri Don't spend time beating on a wall, hoping to transform it into a door. - Coco Chanel

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The time you spend alone with God will transform your character and increase your devotion. Then your integrity and godly behavior in an unbelieving world will make others long to know the Lord. - Charles Stanley Genuine happiness can only be achieved when we transform our way of life from the unthinking pursuit of pleasure to one committed to enriching our inner lives, when we focus on 'being more' rather than simply having more. - Daisaku Ikeda

Some painters transform the sun into a yellow spot, others transform a yellow spot into the sun. - Pablo Picasso

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Help People

Acquire Improve Master

Coaching Learning Advancing Sharpening Smartening ©

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Awareness

Creation

Broadening

Horizon

Creating

Curiosity

Decluttering

Thoughts

Enthusing

Actions

Rejuvenating PERSONAL BRAND

Accelerating CHANGE MANAGEMENT

Jumping ahead with IMPACTFUL PERFORMANCE

Intensifying INFLUENCING

Vibrant CREATIVITY

Knockout BUSINESS PRESENTATIONS

Harmonizing RELATIONSHIPS

Upgrading LEADERSHIP EFFECTIVENESS

Role-impacting COACHING & MENTORING

Achieving high results through TEAM PLAYING

Novel ways for TRAINING THROUGH MULTIMEDIA

Actioning high calibre CUSTOMER SERVICE

Call these the handshake programmes or celebrating Learning and Development in ‘tasters’ menu’, these 3 hours customized inputs will help your people undergo sensitization through Coaching Learning Advancing Sharpening Smartening

at your place and time with the quality commitment of Rajiv Khurana, CMC, FIMC.

Visit us at thepersonnellab.com to know more about our consulting facilitation. Better call us at 9810211256 . Rajiv Khurana CMC, FIMC

[email protected]