The Sentinel 3-14

The SentinelAmsterdamIntegrity, heart, humour

vol. 3 #14 - 24 August 2010

LIFE;A VERSION

FEATURE

pERSpEcTivES

piNKLiFELiFESTyLESOpiNiONTRENDScARTOONSpORTcLASSiFiEDS

Photo ©Laura Lombardi

02cONTENTS

In this issueFEATURE p. 03

cOLOpHON

The Sentinel Amsterdam Editors: Gary Rudland & Denson PierreDesign, realisation and form: Andrei Barburas & No-office.nlWebmaster: Simon O. StudiosWebhost: Amsterjammin.com

Contributors: Laura Lombardi, Colin Bentley, Dirkje Bakker, David King & Maureen Kamp

e-mail: [email protected]: www.thesentinel.eu

Life; a version

TRENDS p. 07

August

pERSpEcTivES p. 08

pink Life

cOLUMN p. 12 SpORT p. 17 MORE:

Stud marks The Gold Room cARTOON p. 06Thatch in da House

FiLM REviEw p. 11Room 2c

HOUSiNG MATTERS p. 13

FOOTbALL p. 14Fantasy Football League

Ô...in general, once you get to the point of a collapse or exhaustive tests, the painful truth is that it is already too late.Õ

Football: Foreplay! Getting to know each other.

Arachnophobia. Pure Amsterdam.

FEATURE 03

Life; a versionAll the bravado, elation and generally boozy emotion

associated with watching (and not necessarily playing) football is also a natural enough high that it can easily

draw the fervent enthusiast into forgetting basic things, like underlying health and social contracts.

04FEATURE

After another particularly humdrum day in an uninspiring office environment, I experienced an adverse reaction to my own lack of action in getting out of an energy-sapping organisation. what is more interesting about this is that it made me re-check how i had chosen to live my life in this city under the sea.

On 8 April, 2010, just 70 metres away from my then address in De Pijp, here in Amsterdam, I went into a full seizure and crumpled to the pavement. It is reported that I was out for some 1-3 minutes, and properly gone it was.

My next peek into the visual range that typifies consciousness was filled with the smiling and reassuring faces of the paramedics of Ambulance 112, asking me those simple and gentle questions we have all heard rehearsed in crummy soap operas and dramatic movies. Odd when it is for real and actually meant to help get a bearing on your mental state, as a guide to helping medical professionals try to save your life. There is no other starting point other than to think that life itself is under threat once there has been unconsciousness as the primary observable manifestation.

A speedy trip to Onze Lieve Vrouw Gasthuis hospital, in a futuristically decked-out V8-engined mini-clinic, was to follow, after they had scooped me on to the convertible stretcher apparatus and got pricking at my fingertip for an immediate blood sample. All that was asked of me, really, was to stay calm and answer further orientation questions.

Who would have thought that the ceiling lights rushing by, again in that television drama type manner, would be an image set I would have to recall, as I was wheeled into the casualty department for emergency assessment by a full team of medics, nurses and even the friendly tea lady.

Full blood sampling and overall function and cognition checks were to follow over the next two hours. During this time, I am also connected to ECG and blood pressure monitors, as well as being physically checked upon at fifteen minute intervals. It is strange to think about what it all could mean when you are just laying in a hospital bed waiting. Waiting for what? A doctor to come along and discharge you or the loud beeping sound of monitoring machines announcing that your heart has gone into some sort of spasm. These concerns are deeply rooted, given that both my father and mother met their demise through what could really be considered premature coronary failures.

The ÔblueÕ team was never called upon. All tests on blood, heart, lungs and guts checked out fine. After another hour and a further full going over by the senior on-duty neurologist, I was, in fact, asked to make my way out and free up an acute admission bed.

During check-out, I was reminded that I would be called the following day to confirm my appointments for follow-up investigations, aimed at finding out what on earth was actually wrong with me. I walked home. Never before has the Amstel River seemed so beautiful on a spring evening. The air was not cliched clear, as I was still in the centre of a city

FEATURE 05

of nearly a million people and the hundreds of thousands of cars they obsess with. The pollution still hung in the air and, after breathing hospital fragrances for a number of hours, you can almost taste the difference.

Next day, I was contacted by phone, as promised, and given a date one week hence, when I was to go to the hospitals out-patients day-care service to have MRI & EEG investigations carried out.

At this point, one realises the importance of certain aspects of living legally in the Netherlands, where everything is tightly centralised around your registration as a citizen:

be registered where you live and carry identification. It really is not some sort of human rights issue, unless you have a juvenile reactionary view about how you are meant to be identified in an emergency or which district hospital you will be taken to in case of such need.

Medical insurance in the Netherlands is pretty much compulsory. pay it. My example of an MRI scan of the brain plus an EEG would surely have cost somewhere close to 600 euro, just for the tests and without the first-rate consultation. If, as in my case, you are living unregistered for many months then you will

have to speedily correct your premium payments with your health insurer. I had to clear arrears of more than 1,300 euro for the eight months I was unregistered. It is not like you can say fuck it, really.

Take some responsibility for your health and destructive habits. My story ended happily but, in general, once you get to the point of a collapse or exhaustive tests, the painful truth is that it is already too late and you have already done the damage, even if you were in denial about doing it to yourself, in this age of information. We are not made of plastic on the inside and all the health warnings you have ever heard are at least partially true. Yes, we all will die but there was a World Cup coming up and it would have been a silly time to go.

When my results came back, three weeks after the initial dramatic incident, the consultant neurologist confirmed that I was, in fact, of a perfectly normal brain, in function and form. The best of modern technology simply emphasised that I was part of that less than 1% of the population who possiblyÕ will have one re-booting seizure in their entire lifetime, usually as a reaction to some stress or environmental antagonism. Let us just hope it stays that way, as the leagues are re-starting, there is a European Championship to look forward to, and so on.

06FEATURE

CartoonBy Colin Bentley

IT LOOKS LIKE HES A GONER, DOCTOR.

A GOONER?

NOOOOOO!

About the authorDenson Pierre is a reasonably active 41 year old, who drinks alcohol (sometimes too much in one sitting) no more than 9 months of any given year, since 1996, and is a social and occasional smoker of hashish. He follows a 99.998% vegan diet and, more importantly, practices positive thinking as a life philosophy. Until the episode described above, he had never before met his family doctor, with whom he had been registered for the past 16 years. They now know each other to say hello and share a healthy smile.

TRENDS

In August, Amsterdam goes virtually quiet. Every day seems like a Sunday, as the streets become deserted and you can cross without even looking sideways. i think i may have even spotted tumbleweed on the Overtoom last Tuesday!

Mass exodusAll inhabitants seem to have fled the humid city for family holidays in France, Spain or, God knows why, Drenthe (this is where hunnebedden are found, but I will save those for another time). Entire homes have been shoved into caravans and cars, hoping for a nice three weeks on a campsite. Jasper and Karin from work are also going with their children of the same age, which will hopefully clear the way for lots of chilled rose-drinking, if only the little second-hand fridge - newly bought off Marktplaats - will last the duration.

Those who stay behind spend their days on Blijburg beachÕ, doing more or less the same thing, as Amsterdam turns into a ghost town, where work halts, phones stop ringing and even the continuous stream of incoming e-mail dries up. The city sits in a vacuum of nothingness for 30 days and, on some days, it even feels as if time has stopped or is moving backwards.

Elementary canalsIn the midst of these deserted summer weeks, when the humidity reaches unbearable levels, a parade of pink- and leather-clad men emerge from nowhere and turn the city

By Dirkje Bakker

August

07

into a testosterone-crazy budget Queens Day simulation, as every last gay guy in the universe flocks to this centre of tolerance and freedom, called Mokum. It is a time to be themselves and be watched by tourists and people from Friesland and De Achterhoek, as they line up along the canals equipped with six-packs of beer (recession) and 3 euro-umbrellas bought last minute at Blokker, since nothing could rain on this parade. Pink is the rage for a week or, for those who dont like pink, very shiny black leather.

ArachnophobiaIn the meantime, another species has managed to invade the part of the city called Yburg. This particular mass can be counted in the millions and not just in hundreds of thousands, like smoky, colourful pieces of confetti: Yburg is being overrun by extraordinary numbers of big, fat, web-weaving, brown-black spiders. These creatures seem to be working hard and crawling harder to make Yburg disappear from Google images, by covering the area in sticky grey threads. Little girls canÕt sleep at night, birds are overweight and cleaners dont know where to start; some have been spotted wandering the streets aimlessly with glassy eyes. Not one pink boat has visited this arachnid-plagued neighbourhood, even though so many of the little girls of Amsterdam live there and everyone knows little girls love pink.

Maybe, next August, the council can arrange to turn all of the spiders pink, instead of brown-black, for Gay Pride week, so Yburg can also enjoy some gayness in the Amsterdam summer (genetic engineers are welcome to apply for this project).

08pERSpEcTvES

Wet, hot , pure Amsterdam.

Photos Dirkje Bakker

pink life

pERSpEcTvES 09

Organic farmer's market Noordermarkt Amsterdam - Every Saturday morningHarvest

10LiFESTyLES

FiLM REviEw

By David King

The French Connection (1971)

This five-time Oscar winner set the benchmark for gritty, anti-hero cop films. Gene Hackman - probably the finest actor of his generation - is Popeye Doyle (great name), who plays his hunch and uncovers a shipment of heroin being smuggled into New York by a suave French baddie. Based on real people and events of the era, this movie also includes one of the best and longest chase scenes ever, involving a car and a subway train, no less!

Room 2cfilm

FiLM REviEw

11

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Cost: 350 euroLocation: Witte de Withstraat 4 AmsterdamFor more information please contact: [email protected]

12cOLUMN

Stud marksBy Maureen Kamp

‘Not only do beauty and brains seldom go together, neither do beauty and football.

As the World Cup hangover finally started to fade, the first official Sentinel Fantasy Football League notification of the new season hit my mailbox. Away with the Robbens, Elias, Stekelenburgs and, not to miss this summer, the Sneijders (my God, they were EVERYWHERE!) and straight back into the Premier League.

Well, straight back into the internet, that is, because its one thing to come up with what seems to be a fun idea, but actually finding 11 drop-dead gorgeous footballers to form my invincible team for the FFL competition soon proved to be quite a quest. Looking at a few of last seasons top scorers, like Rooney and Terry, made me realise that not only do beauty and brains seldom go together, neither do beauty and football.

So, on a lovely sunny Saturday morning, I locked myself up in the house behind the computer and began scrolling through all the photographs of these well-paid Premier League footballers, as if it were a beauty contest. I wasnt looking for good or bad players, but good-looking or ugly ones, or something in between. I skipped the injured players (Jonathan Woodgate is hot but a crock) and the ones that never play (except one, I had to have him and Ill be hoping every game that he will come on). Then I made a list only to the find that my chosen 11 consisted of five goalies! Right, concessions had to be made.

But now, after browsing more than 300 photos and with some help from my Mum (who spent hours on it but didnÕt mind), my honey (who proved to be quite a source) and last seasons winners, DC United (points need to be scored as well), Stud Marks XI is up and running! Well not exactly running just yet, but we did stumble our way into 28th place, which is a very good thing because, as we say in Dutch, fast runners are dead runners.

You can see my full starting line-up on this page. Why not Google a few of them and see if you agree with my choices? In the coming issues, I will explain the difficulty I had in making certain selections. And I still have 12 transfers to use throughout the season, so please send your suggestions for replacement hotties to [email protected]

13HOUSiNG MATTERS

One of the more pressing concerns for Amsterdam-mers and especially newcomers is the need for safe, functional and reasonably priced accommoda-tion. Amsterdam is fullÕ and has been for decades, but it is not lawless and anti-social in terms of its housing regulation in the rental sector.

Do not be fooled by a few new tiles and a fresh lick of paint!

GzGuido Zijlstra Huurrecht, Incasso en AdviesJuridisch adviesbureau voor huurders

Kwaliteit tegen een laag tarief

Ondersteuning bewoners(groepen) bij sloop- of renovatieprojecten;Opzetten / begeleiden huurteams en woonspreekuren;Voorlichting huur(prijzen)recht;Huurrechtprocedures bij huurcommissie en kantonrechter;Incassoprocedures

www.guidozijlstra.nl [email protected] 10766, 1001 ET Amsterdam Tel. / fax: 020 – 7853169

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Quality at a reasonable rate

- reduction in rent levels;- service charge returns/refunds, also fully backdated; - reclaiming of deposits;- forcing landlords to solve maintenance problems;- contesting rent contract terminations in court;- any other legal disputes between landlords and tenants.

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postbus 10766 1001ET Amsterdam - tel/fax +31 (0) 20 - 7853169

Housingmatters

‘Do not be fooled by a few new tiles and a fresh lick of paint!’

2010 -2011FANTASy FOOTbALL LEAGUE

14SpORT

SpORT 15

The first weekend of a new Premier League season is always an exciting time. Its a bit like going back to school after the summer holidays and meeting up with all your old friends. It can also be a very nervous time, especially if you are involved in fantasy football. Will the players you have selected start, have clubs been hiding injuries and who will make the greatest impression right from the start of the season?

Some of these questions were answered in the very first match of the season: Tottenham Hotspur vs Manchester City, at 1.45pm (CET) on Saturday, 14 August. As the team news came through and before a ball had even been kicked, we learnt that Englands Joe Hart had been preferred over IrelandÕs Shay Given in goal for Man City.

In the days running up to this match, the consensus seemed to be that whoever was picked in goal for City would be their number one keeper for the season. Hart played a blinder in the 0-0 draw, justifying his selection and although CityÕs manager Roberto Mancini has stated that he would like Given to stay at the club, at 34 years of age, it seems unlikely he will want to play second fiddle to a 23-year-old.

Given goIf rumours are to be believed, Given may be on his way to Arsenal before the transfer deadline closes on 31 August, which may appease those fantasy football managers who selected him in their starting line-ups.

Mancini named Carlos Tevez as captain, making him an almost-certain starter from now on, and handed league debuts to Yaya Toure (joining his defender brother, Kolo) and David Silva, which meant that Adam Johnson started on the bench, alongside Emmanuel Adebayor. There was no place for Roque Santa Cruz or Robinho in CityÕs opening squad, and Craig Bellamy has been allowed to leave on loan to his home-town club, Cardiff City.

In contrast, the only minor surprise in SpurÕs opening-fixture team was that Tom Huddlestone was preferred to Wilson Palacios in midfield, perhaps with their midweek Champions League qualifier in mind. It seems that Harry Redknapp only needs to worry about injuries, these days, as the Spurs first team virtually picks itself.

Hammers minus Hammer hammered Later on Saturday, Aston Villa gave us our first glimpse of how they are faring without Martin OÕNeill, who dramatically resigned five days before the start of the season. There was a great atmosphere at Villa Park, where West Ham (The Hammers) were soundly beaten 3-0, fuelling speculation that OÕNeillÕs departure was perhaps not as distressing as expected. West Ham were without new signing, Thomas Hitzlsperger, the German international midfielder. Villa were without injured defenders James Collins, Carlos Cuellar and Curtis Davies, as well as striker, Gabriel Agbonlahor. James Milner scored one of their goals in his final game for the club, before joining the throngs at Man City, with Stephen Ireland moving in the opposite direction.

There were no surprises in either teamÕs selection as Blackburn took on Everton, with Marouane Fellaini making his return from long-term injury. Tim HowardÕs place in goal will not be under threat despite his blunder, which resulted in the winning Blackburn goal. Fellow goalkeeper Mark Schwarzer put in a transfer request ahead of FulhamÕs opening fixture at Bolton, giving Arsene Wenger a choice of replacement keepers for the unreliable Manuel Almunia. David Stockdale proved to be an able replacement for Schwarzer and this was the only thing of note about their 0-0 draw.

Backto school

Gary Rudland reflects on the opening weekend of premier League football and asks Ôwhat have we learnt?Õ

Dimitar Berbatov - promising early-season form.

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Thomas Hitzlsperger, ÔThe HammerÕ

Darren Bent got straight back into scoring mode in Sunderlands 2-2 draw with Birmingham, during which Lee Cattermole was correctly sent off. Kenwyne JonesÕ departure to Stoke City leaves the door open for ex-Man Utd striker, Fraizer Campbell, to make his mark at Sunderland. Wolves beat Stoke 2-1 and the surprise result of the day was Wigans 4-0 home defeat to newly promoted Blackpool!

Saturday nightThe evening game was far more predictable and saw Chelsea punish West Brom 6-0 on their return to the Premier League. Didier Drogba had been an injury doubt all week but still managed to score a hat-trick! Florent Malouda also stood out and Petr Cech returned between the posts to keep a clean sheet. AlexÕs return from injury meant that Branislav Ivanovic started on the bench, which will be a concern to many fantasy football managers.

Sunday afternoonThe most anticipated fixture of the weekend had Sunday all to itself, as Liverpool entertained Arsenal. And entertaining it most certainly was, with LiverpoolÕs Joe Cole sent off just before half-time in his league debut for the club. Arsene Wenger decided that Cesc Fabregas needed another weeks rest and he did not even make the bench. David NÕGog put Liverpool ahead just after half-time and new manager Roy Hodgson introduced Fernando Torres late in the game. Robin van Persie came on for Arsenal a couple of minutes later and their persistent pressure finally resulted in an equalising Pepe Reina own goal. Hodgson has since assured Reina that his place is not under threat, despite bringing in a new keeper.

United vs UnitedThe opening fixtures were rounded off by Manchester United spanking Newcastle United 3-0. Once again, Wayne Rooney failed to make the score sheet, as the goals fell to a much sharper looking Dimitar Berbatov, Darren Fletcher and the veteran Ryan Giggs, following a pass from fellow veteran and man of the match, Paul Scholes.

Sir Alex Ferguson fielded the same back four as in the Community Shield, with Jonny Evans filling in for the injured Rio Ferdinand and John OShea preferred at right back. It remains to be seen whether he can make that position his own on a permanent basis, with Gary Neville, Wes Brown and Rafael da Silva waiting to pounce.

Of course, by the time you read this, another full set of fixtures will have been completed, so you probably know much more than I do.

Hart (rear) gets the nod over Given

Joe Cole - inauspicious debut

Fraizer Campbell - chance to shine

Thomas Hitzlsperger, ÔThe HammerÕ

Hart (rear) gets the nod over Given

SpORT 17SpORT 15

The GoldRoom

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This week we return with the reformatted high-rolling fantasy football game, Fantasy Football Gold - Champions League (FFG-CL). The competition is now linked to and uses the same format as The Sentinel Fantasy Football League (FFL), and is a league of champions. There are ten players and, at the end of this season, the lowest-placed competitor will be relegated. The top two managers from this seasons FFL will be invited to enter the 2011-2012 FFG-CL competition. Thereafter, it will involve two relegations and two promotions each season.

In launching this competition, it is worthwhile highlighting the two players that most expert managers have selected in their starting line-ups. The players attracting the most attention and investment are usually not a surprise, but there has also always been a random edge to aspirational scheming.

The most popular player in the FFG-CL is Joe Cole, now of Liverpool FC. Six of the ten managers have gone for the Londoner, who has uprooted to the North of England in search of regular first-team football.

A player such as Joe Cole is easily favoured for many irrational reasons, but it is surprising that so many managers have gone for him in this game, at this stage. There is a tremendous gulf between a player who can excite the eyes and one who can play throughout a season at a sustained high-scoring level, while avoiding injury. Despite all of his gifts, including the ability to dribble and shoot from range, Joe Cole remains slow in the sprint and has spent what seems like three years recovering from one injury after another. Chelsea are known for many things, but they are not known for allowing league beaters to walk away on free transfers whilst at their peak.

Joe Cole is 29 and Liverpool FC are perhaps most peoples favourite second team. I will allow at least half the season to see if this display of hope in the face of the clubÕs financial adversity can be propped-up and improved by an injury free, likeable, semi-genius wearing number 10 for the Reds.

In the high-rolling FFG-CL, it is generally more prudent to go for the sturdier, high-yield players, as so many of the classy showmen fail to withstand the rigours of the worldÕs fastest and most rugged top league. Four of the managers in the FFG-CL have started the season with the man who is destined to overtake the likes of Matthew Le Tissier (retired), Paul Scholes and perhaps even his current teammate, Frank Lampard, among the Premier Leagues record scorers.

The less said about Didier Drogba at this stage of the season the better. He is phenomenal and does not need me to repeat it. Just to prove the point, he opened the season with a hat-trick, while clearly playing at no more than 80% fitness. This sort of form must make defenders shudder and, for me, provided he stays fit for more than 75% of the season, makes Chelsea favourites to retain their Premier League title.

By Denson Pierre