1 Presentation content developed by:. 2 Pleasant Positive Unpleasant Negative High Emotion Energy Low How are you? Mood Meter Energy ___ Mood ___.

1

Presentation content developed by:

2

PleasantPositive

UnpleasantNegative

High

Emotion

En

ergy

Low

How are you? Mood Meter

Energy ___Energy ___

Mood ___Mood ___

3

Mood Meter ResultsMood Meter Results

EmotionE

nerg

y

4PleasantUnpleasant

High

Emotion

En

ergy

Low

Sad

HappyAngry

Calm

Content

Pleased

Afraid

Annoyed

Bored Tired

Surprised

Does it matter how you feel?

5

Success factors: Must have

IntelligenceIntelligence MotivationMotivation Technical KnowledgeTechnical Knowledge

6

Success factors: Helps to have

Specific skillsSpecific skills Certain experiencesCertain experiences Emotional IntelligenceEmotional Intelligence

7

You might have heard of EI / EQ

8

The science of EI …

Began in 1990 by Salovey & MayerBegan in 1990 by Salovey & Mayer

“Mayer, Salovey, Caruso’s approach sets the gold standard.”

- Dr. Catherine Daus & Dr. Neal Ashkanasy

Emotional intelligence is "the ability to monitor one's own and others' feelings and emotions, to discriminate among them, and to use this information to guide one's thinking and action".

9

Emotional intelligence theory

IDENTIFYIDENTIFY

USEUSE

UNDERSTANDUNDERSTAND

MANAGEMANAGE

10

Emotional Intelligence is:

A hard skillA hard skill A form of A form of

intelligenceintelligence

WhereWhere You think about You think about

emotions, andemotions, and Emotions help you Emotions help you

thinkthink

11

Emotional Intelligence relates to:

Greater empathy for othersGreater empathy for others More positive behaviorsMore positive behaviors Less ‘negative’ behaviorsLess ‘negative’ behaviors Better quality social Better quality social

relationshipsrelationships Enhanced communicationEnhanced communication Social supportSocial support Vision, charisma, teamwork …Vision, charisma, teamwork …

12

Emotions have meaning and importance

1. Occurs due to a change in the environment1. Occurs due to a change in the environment2. Occurs automatically and quickly2. Occurs automatically and quickly3. Changes attention and thought3. Changes attention and thought4. Certain physical 4. Certain physical feelingsfeelings5. Motivates behavior 5. Motivates behavior

Serves an Serves an adaptiveadaptive function function

13

Emotions drive relationships

The primary function of emotion The primary function of emotion is to mobilize the organism to is to mobilize the organism to deal quickly with important deal quickly with important interpersonal eventsinterpersonal events..

Events include: threats, attacks, Events include: threats, attacks, alarms, courtships, social contact, alarms, courtships, social contact, isolation, greetings, appeasement, isolation, greetings, appeasement, dominance, submission, and play.dominance, submission, and play.

Robert Plutchik, psychologistRobert Plutchik, psychologist

14

Emotions are universal …

Darwin Darwin The expression of the The expression of the emotions in man and animalsemotions in man and animals (1872) (1872)

15

Emotions have universal meaning

HappinessHappiness Gain something of valueGain something of value

SadnessSadness Lose something of valueLose something of value

SurpriseSurprise Something is happeningSomething is happening

AngerAnger Blocked from getting somethingBlocked from getting something

FearFear Possible threatPossible threat

DisgustDisgust Rules are violatedRules are violated

16

English Deutsch Français Italiano EspagnolAfraid Verängstigt Apeuré Impaurito Atemorizado

Angry Ärgerlich en colère Arrabbiato Enfadado

Happy Glücklich Heureux Felice Feliz

Sad Traurig Triste Triste Triste

Surprised Überrascht Surpris Sorpreso Sorprendido

Disgusted Ekelerfüllt Dégoûté Disgustato Asqueado

Calm Ruhig Calme Calmo Calmado

Bored Gelangweilt Ennuyé Annoiato Aburrido

Interested Interessiert Intéressé Interessato Interesado

Excited Erregt Excité Eccitato Excitado

A common emotional language A common emotional language ……

17

But, there are individual and group differences

Emotional sensitivity:- Ability to pick up emotional signals - Varies from person to person

Specific causes of emotions:- Can vary from person to person and across groups

18

Specific causes may differ

DisgustDisgust

19

Emotional Differences

When we When we expressexpress these emotions: these emotions:

- - Differs from culture to culture Differs from culture to culture

- These are called - These are called displaydisplay rules rules

20

Emotional display rules

Emotions Emotions expressed at workexpressed at work

AngerAnger HappinessHappiness

53%

19%

21

Do you know if you are emotionally intelligent?

22

People are poor judges of their own intelligence and very poor judges of their emotional intelligence

Self-rated IQ Self-rated IQ versus IQ testsversus IQ tests

Self-rated EI Self-rated EI versus EI Ability versus EI Ability testtest

Self-Report EI x MSCEIT Scores

23

Measuring EI: MSCEIT

Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence TestIntelligence Test

MSCEIT is an IQ test for emotionsMSCEIT is an IQ test for emotions

24

Objective EI Tests

Have “right and wrong” answersHave “right and wrong” answers Objectively scoredObjectively scored Based on fact that emotions are dataBased on fact that emotions are data

25

Identify Emotions

Anger Anger

SadnessSadness

HappinessHappiness

DisgustDisgust

FearFear

SurpriseSurprise

Non

eN

on

e

Perh

ap

Perh

ap

ss Pre

sen

Pre

sen

tt

26

Your score:

Anger Anger

SadnessSadness

HappinessHappiness

DisgustDisgust

FearFear

SurpriseSurprise

Non

eN

on

e

Perh

ap

Perh

ap

ss Pre

sen

tP

resen

t

27

Use Emotions

Anger

Sadness

Happiness

Which emotion would be most useful Which emotion would be most useful to have someone agree to help you to have someone agree to help you with a difficult and time-consuming with a difficult and time-consuming project?project?

28

Your score:

Which emotion would be most useful to have someone agree to help you with a difficult and time-consuming project?

Anger

Sadness

Happiness

29

Understand Emotions

1. A client feels frustrated.1. A client feels frustrated.

2. Repeatedly asks you for information.2. Repeatedly asks you for information.

3. He is getting annoyed.3. He is getting annoyed.

4. You ignore the request.4. You ignore the request.

5. The client will feel: 5. The client will feel:

Disgust

Anger

Sadness

30

Your score:

1. A client feels frustrated.1. A client feels frustrated.

2. Repeatedly asks you for information.2. Repeatedly asks you for information.

3. He is getting annoyed.3. He is getting annoyed.

4. You ignore the request.4. You ignore the request.

5. The client will feel: 5. The client will feel:

Disgust

Anger

Sadness

31

Manage Emotions

The client keeps asking for more and more The client keeps asking for more and more information about the same product. How information about the same product. How effective would each of these actions be in effective would each of these actions be in addressing client concerns?addressing client concerns?

Address each of the issues in order of their importance.

Find out what is making the client anxious.

Demonstrate that the concerns are unfounded.Demonstrate that the concerns are unfounded.

Not

At

All

A L

ittl

e

A L

ot

32

Your score:

Address each of the issues in order of their importance.

Find out what is making the client anxious.

Demonstrate that the concerns are unfounded.Demonstrate that the concerns are unfounded.

A L

ittl

e

A L

ot

Not

At

All

The client keeps asking for more and more information about the same product. How effective would each of these actions be in addressing client concerns?

33

Applying Your EI

High EI: apply your abilitiesHigh EI: apply your abilities

Low EI: Low EI:

DevelopDevelop

CompensateCompensate

34

35

Identify Emotions

Identify emotions in self and othersIdentify emotions in self and others Express emotions accuratelyExpress emotions accurately

36

Identify Emotions

We often don't share feelings information.We often don't share feelings information.

We may cover up how we feel in order to protect We may cover up how we feel in order to protect others. others.

We say that everything is fine when it is not.We say that everything is fine when it is not.

We claim that we're not worried, when we are.We claim that we're not worried, when we are.

However, such deception is easy to spot. However, such deception is easy to spot.

We don't protect our clients or family in this way, but We don't protect our clients or family in this way, but instead, we create an atmosphere of mistrust. instead, we create an atmosphere of mistrust.

37

Relevance

Enhances communicationEnhances communication Enhances quality of Enhances quality of

relationshipsrelationships Source of info about your clientSource of info about your client Sends information to clientSends information to client

38

Identify Emotions Questions

Pay attention to emotion cues?Pay attention to emotion cues? Pick up on emotional signals?Pick up on emotional signals? Read people accurately?Read people accurately? Accurately express my emotions?Accurately express my emotions?

39

Identify Emotions Exercise

40

41

Use Emotions

Use emotions to help you think in Use emotions to help you think in different waysdifferent ways

Match the right emotion to the taskMatch the right emotion to the task

42

Use Emotions

What Negative Moods Do For ThinkingWhat Negative Moods Do For Thinking Provide us with a clear focusProvide us with a clear focus Details examined more efficientlyDetails examined more efficiently Search for errors is enhancedSearch for errors is enhanced

What Positive Moods Do For ThinkingWhat Positive Moods Do For Thinking Expands our thinkingExpands our thinking Helps generate new ideasHelps generate new ideas Encourages us to consider Encourages us to consider

possibilitiespossibilities

43

Use Emotions: Specific influence of emotions

Emotion ImpactAnger Fight

Disgust Reject

Fear Avoid

Sadness Give up

Surprise Pay attention

Happiness Explore

44

Relevance

Emotional connectionEmotional connection Communicate, motivate and Communicate, motivate and

inspireinspire EmpathyEmpathy

45

Use Emotions Questions

Consider how client’s moods impact Consider how client’s moods impact his decision making?his decision making?

Is this the right time for this Is this the right time for this discussion?discussion?

Match the mood to the situation?Match the mood to the situation?

46

Use Emotions Exercise

47

48

Understand Emotions

Understand the causes of Understand the causes of emotionsemotions

Understand complex emotionsUnderstand complex emotions

49

Relevance

Insight into othersInsight into others What bothers them?What bothers them? What worries them?What worries them? What makes them What makes them

happy?happy?

50

Understand Emotions Questions

Do I truly understand the client?Do I truly understand the client? Understand myself?Understand myself? Do I engage in emotional what-if Do I engage in emotional what-if

planning before important meetings?planning before important meetings?

51

Understand Emotions Exercise

Emotion Cause You Other

AngerAnger ObstacleObstacle

DisgustDisgust DistastefulDistasteful

FearFear ThreatThreat

HappinessHappiness Gain somethingGain something

SadnessSadness Lose something of valueLose something of value

SurpriseSurprise Unexpected eventUnexpected event

InterestInterest

? ?

52

53

Manage Emotions

Emotions contain data, so stay open Emotions contain data, so stay open to feelings to feelings

Good decisions and actions require Good decisions and actions require emotion.emotion.

54

Relevance

Ironically, the feeling that something is real, Ironically, the feeling that something is real, true, and right comes not from the true, and right comes not from the reasonable neocortex, but from evolutionary reasonable neocortex, but from evolutionary older, older, emotionemotion centers of the limbic cortex. centers of the limbic cortex. MacLeanMacLean

Far from interfering with rationality, the Far from interfering with rationality, the absence of emotion and feeling can absence of emotion and feeling can break break down down rationality and make wise decision rationality and make wise decision making almost impossible. making almost impossible. DamasioDamasio

55

Manage Emotions Questions

Pay attention to what your feelings Pay attention to what your feelings are communicating to you?are communicating to you?

Stay open to unpleasant feelings?Stay open to unpleasant feelings? Get at the deeper meaning of client Get at the deeper meaning of client

communications?communications?

56

Manage Emotions

Consider a few recent decisions.Consider a few recent decisions.

Have you ever made a decision where the Have you ever made a decision where the logical arguments were strong, but you logical arguments were strong, but you had a bad feeling about the situation?had a bad feeling about the situation?

Have you made a good decision where Have you made a good decision where you had a feel for the right thing, even you had a feel for the right thing, even though the numbers did not support the though the numbers did not support the decision? decision?

57

A blueprint for emotions…

IDENTIFYIDENTIFY

USEUSE

UNDERSTANDUNDERSTAND

MANAGEMANAGE

What emotions are you, and others, experiencing?

How are these emotionsdirecting and impacting thinking?

What caused these emotions? How might these emotions change?

How do you manage your emotions and other’s emotions?

58

Manage Emotions Exercise

Emotional Blueprint CaseEmotional Blueprint Case

59

Key Points:

A focus on emotion does not A focus on emotion does not make you weak or vulnerable.make you weak or vulnerable.

Emotions are dataEmotions are data

Signals about relationshipsSignals about relationships

Use the BlueprintUse the Blueprint

60

An emotionally-intelligent conclusion

Does it matter Does it matter how we end a how we end a meeting?meeting?

A phone call?A phone call? A conference?A conference? This sessionThis session?? PleasantUnpleasant

High

Low

61

Positive, energetic

Generate ideasGenerate ideas

Consider possibilitiesConsider possibilities

PleasantUnpleasant

High

Low

62

An emotionally-intelligent conclusion

I feel great.I feel great. I am full of I am full of

energy.energy. I am I am jumpingjumping

for joy!for joy!

63