WORKPLACE RELATIONSHIPS. Workplace relationships This module covers the basics of networking, within the context of the individual student and the universal.

WORKPLACE RELATIONSHIPSWORKPLACE RELATIONSHIPS

Workplace relationshipsWorkplace relationships This module covers the basics of networking, within the

context of the individual student and the universal appeal of active listening.

Key terms of active listening are defined. Practical recommendations to overcoming limitations in

relational practice (including anxiety) are provided. Key areas of “Developing Rapport,” “Active Listening,”

“Networking,” and “Building Relationships” are introduced. Exercises enable the student to define his/her own network

and to identify most effective means by which to tap into that network for professional development and advancement.

AgendaAgendaHow does today fit in the big picture?How does today fit in the big picture?

Networking and Building Relationships are the number 1 means to build exciting job opportunities for yourself that fit with your skills, purpose and desire.

These skills can be used for:◦ Better experiences in team projects◦ Improved interviewing skills◦ Increased job opportunities◦ Enhancing connection to community

(understanding the big picture)

BRAINSTORMING SESSIONBRAINSTORMING SESSIONWhat behaviours should people exhibit in

order to meet each the following in their workplace relationships:◦ Trust?◦ Confidence?◦ Positive relationships with colleagues and

clients?◦ Rapport?

Developing RapportDeveloping RapportThe Basics (Interviewing)The Basics (Interviewing)

Rapport is a/an◦ psychological closeness/comfortableness ◦ established at the beginning of the interview◦ Time when the verbal and non-verbal actions of you and the interviewee are

in sync.◦ unconscious human interaction.◦ interpersonal relationship characterised by cooperation, confidence and

harmony.

With rapport,◦ interviewers (you) feel less inhibited in asking questions.◦ interviewees are less resistant about answering questions◦ The value of the interview can increase drastically! (it’s almost magic).

The degree of rapport you establish determines the degree of compliance you obtain from the interviewee.

Developing RapportDeveloping RapportHow can you build rapport?How can you build rapport?

Active listening (later) Small talk

◦ save tough questions for the end after you’ve developed rapport Good orientation Warm, friendly manner Call attention to similarities

◦ Compliment◦ Show interest in work/research

Enhance interviewees self-image◦ People are flattered to be asked for their opinions

Show expressions of◦ Genuine interest◦ Empathy◦ Positive recognition◦ Easy eye contact◦ Appropriate positive silences

Active ListeningActive ListeningThe BasicsThe Basics

Active listening is◦ a structured way of listening and responding that focuses on the

speaker.

◦ good for getting people to open up, improving mutual understanding, and developing rapport.

Four defining characteristics of an active listener:◦ Desire to be interviewee-directed

◦ Desire to be non-defensive

◦ Desire to imagine roles, perspectives, or experiences of the interviewee

◦ Desire to listen as a receiver and NOT as a critic

Active ListeningActive ListeningThe Specifics – 9 Discrete SkillsThe Specifics – 9 Discrete Skills

Attending, Acknowledging: ◦ providing awareness of the interviewee

Restating, Paraphrasing: ◦ responding to interviewee’s basic verbal message

Reflecting: ◦ reflecting experiences or content that has been perceived through cues

Interpreting: ◦ offering a tentative interpretation of interviewee’s feelings, desires or

meanings Summarizing, Synthesising:

◦ bringing everything together; providing a focus Probing:

◦ questioning in a supportive way that requests more information or clarifies Supporting:

◦ showing empathy in your own individual way Checking Perceptions:

◦ finding out if interpretations and perceptions are valid and accurate Being quiet:

◦ Giving the interviewee time to talk AND think

Active ListeningActive ListeningCommunicating that you are listening…Communicating that you are listening…

Attending◦ Non-verbal

Eye contact Body language Use of silence

◦ Verbal Minimal encouragers

Questions◦ Open questions

How? What? Could? Would?◦ Closed questions

Is? Are? Do? Did? Focus

Be aware that the conversation may take on a variety of focuses: interviewee focus, interviewer focus, topic focus, or other focus

Reflections Reinforce and support the interviewee Clarify the meaning of communications

Summary Outline for easier remembering, better understanding and showing relationship of

main points

Interviewing ExerciseInterviewing ExerciseQuestions, reflections & summarisationQuestions, reflections & summarisation

1. Form groups of 3: listener, speaker, & observer2. Speaker is going to talk for 2-4 minutes about (choose one):

• Tell us about an internship experience that had meaning for you.• Tell us about something particularly positive/negative in one of your classes.• Tell us about the weather.

3. Listener is going to ask questions, reflect, and at the end and summarise

4. Observer is going to keep track of listener’s responses• Open vs. closed questions• Focus of each question• Feeling vs. factual reflections• Effectiveness of listeners summary

5. Share thoughts… listener then speaker and end with observer6. 2-4 minutes for speaking/listening and 2-4 minutes for sharing

NetworkingNetworkingThe BasicsThe Basics Make a list of people you know Assign yourself a quota of contacts to make every week

◦ By e-mail: be brief and to the point◦ By phone: by itself or as a follow-up to an e-mail◦ By professional gathering: great place to schedule follow-up

discussion and informational interviews◦ By social gathering: it’s okay to casually mention your

work/research interests Before contacting someone

◦ Schedule networking when you expect to have energy and confident

◦ Take a moment to ground your purpose in making the contact Accept as many invitations as you can “truly” attend! Use the Internet as a SUPPLEMENT to your other

networking strategies Make Networking a “main” task not an “aside”

Send thank-you letters (or e-mails) for referrals

NetworkingNetworkingA strength-centered approachA strength-centered approach

Does mingling at professional events to ‘network’ make you ill? Do you avoid networking and then panic? Do you feel comfortable building relationships? Your feelings are telling you something that can’t be solved with:

◦ Grow a thick skin

◦ Get over it

◦ Do it anyway

Painless Networking:◦ Like writing? - organise a review article with others in your field

◦ Like presenting? - offer seminars

◦ Like building things? - organise demonstrations at technical conferences

◦ Just shy? - volunteer to help at professional events (e.g. conferences)

◦ Prefer e-mail over phone? - Use the phone call to draw attention to e-mail

◦ Low self-esteem? - recruit friends/mentor/spiritual advisor to build you up

◦ Trouble following through? - seek mutual accountability with your peers

NetworkingNetworkingAn ExerciseAn Exercise

With a blank piece of paper

1. Write your name in the middle

2. Determine what networks you have: Family

Business

Neighbors

Alumni

Nonprofit

Interests

Sports

NetworkingNetworkingAn ExerciseAn Exercise

FamilySpouseParentsSiblings

ExtendedFormer

KidsPets

BusinessColleagues

Former companiesStrategic partnersService providers

Suppliers

Neighbours

AlumniHigh school

CollegeGraduate school

executive

NonprofitCharity

CommunityProfessional Affiliations

Education

InterestsTravelCarsArt

MusicLanguages

Sports

BE WISE*ReligionPoliticsGender

*Be wise about cross-networking within these groups.

YOU

Reasons why Networking does not Reasons why Networking does not always come easyalways come easy

• FearFear• Personality TypesPersonality Types

• Unfamiliar TerritoryUnfamiliar Territory• Getting startedGetting started

Helpful HintsHelpful Hints

• Develop your personal ‘elevator speech’ Develop your personal ‘elevator speech’ or commercialor commercial

• Practice with friends who can provide Practice with friends who can provide helpful feedbackhelpful feedback

Take one step at a timeTake one step at a time

Develop a Networking PlanDevelop a Networking Plano WhoWhoo WhenWheno WhereWhereo HowHow

Work the planWork the plano Follow-up with every lead in a timely mannerFollow-up with every lead in a timely mannero Keep a record of conversations and meetings Keep a record of conversations and meetings

(PIM)(PIM)o Develop a contact follow-up scheduleDevelop a contact follow-up schedule

o Thank those who help youThank those who help you

Networking TipsNetworking Tips

Get a short and appropriate email addressOrder resume cards with brief resume statsWrite and master a 30 second pitch (record &

listen)Build a LinkedIn profile and update it often –

Add recommendationsBecome active on LinkedIn groupsSign up on Twitter – follow any people who

follow youCreate an appropriate Facebook pageAsk for referrals when sharing business and

resume cardsJoin organisations and networks, chambers of

commerce and business networksParticipate in discussion forums

Networking TipsNetworking Tips

Join professional organisationsAttend industry conferencesAttend Job FairsJoin support groupsVolunteer your time and talents to worthy

causesJoin a gym or YMCA Identify mentors and/or coachesSchedule and conduct informational

interviewsUtilise Alumni Associations and career officesFollow up better than your competitionSend Thank You notes

Networking Do’sNetworking Do’s

• Be genuine and authentic, building trust and Be genuine and authentic, building trust and relationshipsrelationships

• Develop your goals for each networking meetingDevelop your goals for each networking meeting• Visit groups that spark your interestVisit groups that spark your interest• Hold volunteer positionsHold volunteer positions• Ask Open-Ended questionsAsk Open-Ended questions• Become known as a resource to othersBecome known as a resource to others• Articulate what you are looking for & what you doArticulate what you are looking for & what you do• Follow through quickly and efficiently on referralsFollow through quickly and efficiently on referrals• Understand the needs of the people you are Understand the needs of the people you are

networking with and offer some value to THEMnetworking with and offer some value to THEM• Try to contact one person per day Try to contact one person per day • Go beyond your industryGo beyond your industry

Networking Don’ts Networking Don’ts

• Don’t fear the ‘big shots’Don’t fear the ‘big shots’• Don’t corner a ‘heavy-hitter’ with your Don’t corner a ‘heavy-hitter’ with your

personal life story at a social eventpersonal life story at a social event• Don’t hand out business cards to everyone Don’t hand out business cards to everyone • Don’t only talk to people you knowDon’t only talk to people you know• Don’t waste time talking to ‘Me-ers’Don’t waste time talking to ‘Me-ers’• Don’t drink too much at evening events– Don’t drink too much at evening events–

obviously!obviously!• Don’t expect anythingDon’t expect anything• Don’t dismiss anyone as irrelevantDon’t dismiss anyone as irrelevant• Don’t take ‘NO’ personallyDon’t take ‘NO’ personally

NetworkingNetworkingAn ExerciseAn Exercise

Pick a network to start and do a complete inventory:◦ Name each person.

◦ Think of person’s profession, research, hobbies, etc.

◦ What do you know about each person?

◦ What does each person know about you?

◦ Will each person return your call? How quickly? Why not?

◦ Whom are you comfortable calling? Not calling? Why?

◦ Take a break and look at the bigger picture.

◦ Make a list of people to introduce to each other. Why would they like to meet?

What are their common links?

Linked InLinked In Most widely used professional online networkMost widely used professional online network People with more than twenty connections are People with more than twenty connections are

thirty-four times more likely to be approached thirty-four times more likely to be approached with job opportunity than people with less than with job opportunity than people with less than fivefive

Career profiles are global resource to analyse Career profiles are global resource to analyse and mine professional dataand mine professional data

Effective Use of Linked InEffective Use of Linked In

Create full, creative and honest profileCreate full, creative and honest profileUse active and illustrative keywordsUse active and illustrative keywordsActively communicate within groups- Actively communicate within groups-

undergrad/grad schools, other interest undergrad/grad schools, other interest groupsgroups

Post recommendationsPost recommendationsUse “answers” and ask questionsUse “answers” and ask questionsSet up local informational interviewsSet up local informational interviews

Who Posts Profiles?Who Posts Profiles?

Currently employed, unemployed, Currently employed, unemployed, those making transitions, recruitersthose making transitions, recruiters

Current students building a Current students building a network-little experiencenetwork-little experience

Professionals making career Professionals making career transition – 5+ yrs experiencetransition – 5+ yrs experience

Campus alumni with considerable Campus alumni with considerable experience in field/sector/regionexperience in field/sector/region

Analysing ProfilesAnalysing Profiles

When did they graduate?When did they graduate? How many jobs after graduation?How many jobs after graduation? When was “take-off period”-when When was “take-off period”-when

employment exceeded 3-5 years with employment exceeded 3-5 years with same company or organisation?same company or organisation?

Did they switch or sustain work in same Did they switch or sustain work in same sector?sector?

Are they actively using LI? Do other Are they actively using LI? Do other business contacts know this person?business contacts know this person?

Taking the Next StepTaking the Next Step

Cluster contacts in same institution or Cluster contacts in same institution or organisation organisation

Google names, research their Google names, research their function/focus/expertisefunction/focus/expertise

If local: message for informational If local: message for informational interview interview

If not: write focused brief messages with If not: write focused brief messages with targeted questiontargeted question

Maintain MomentumMaintain Momentum

Be purposeful & persistentBe purposeful & persistent Seek out new opportunities to interact with Seek out new opportunities to interact with

professionals and alumniprofessionals and alumni Inform existing network of positive progress Inform existing network of positive progress

– be engaged– be engaged Regularly update profile – your networks Regularly update profile – your networks

knows when you do…knows when you do… Keep moving forward - do not be Keep moving forward - do not be

discouraged!discouraged!

Building RelationshipsBuilding Relationships

Why does the (business) relationship matter?◦ It makes the process of following up periodically easier and more

productive.◦ It allows the network community to proceed and grow even when you are

not explicitly attending to it.

What is a successful relationship?◦ Starts out tentative and fragile.◦ Evolves over time to a strong, resilient bond.◦ Characterised by increasing trust and commitment.◦ Engages mutual fulfillment.◦ Provides mutual benefit.

Phases of a successful relationship◦ Visibility: establishing a common ground; requires consistent maintenance◦ Credibility: are you who you say you are (will third parties agree?)◦ Maturity: a relationship that provides mutual reliable benefit

TRUST:TRUST:

Firm reliance on the Firm reliance on the integrity, ability or integrity, ability or

character of a person character of a person or thing.or thing.

Why are trusting Why are trusting relationships so relationships so important in the important in the workplace?workplace?

85% of problems in 85% of problems in the workplace are the workplace are due to interpersonal due to interpersonal problems, rather than problems, rather than lack of technical skill.lack of technical skill.

ConnectingConnecting““The connections we make are what pull us The connections we make are what pull us

through hard times and give meaning to through hard times and give meaning to the good. Simply put, we need one the good. Simply put, we need one

another. We need connections that matter, another. We need connections that matter, connections that are heartfelt. We need to connections that are heartfelt. We need to connect--or reconnect--to our friends, our connect--or reconnect--to our friends, our families, our neighbors, ourfamilies, our neighbors, our communities. communities.

We also need to connect--or reconnect---to We also need to connect--or reconnect---to our pasts, our traditions and our ideals.”our pasts, our traditions and our ideals.”

Good Communicators:Good Communicators:

•Are effective in give-and-take, registering Are effective in give-and-take, registering emotional cues in attuning their messageemotional cues in attuning their message•Deal with difficult issues straightforwardlyDeal with difficult issues straightforwardly•Listen well, seek mutual understanding, Listen well, seek mutual understanding, and welcome sharing of information fullyand welcome sharing of information fully•Foster open communication and stay Foster open communication and stay receptive to bad news as well as goodreceptive to bad news as well as good

Interpersonal SkillsInterpersonal SkillsThe most effective people in organisations The most effective people in organisations naturally use their emotional radar to sense naturally use their emotional radar to sense how others are reacting, and they fine-tune how others are reacting, and they fine-tune their own response to push the interaction in their own response to push the interaction in the best direction.the best direction.

What’s Below the Waterline Makes What’s Below the Waterline Makes the Difference in Performance!the Difference in Performance!

Necessary for top

performance, but not

sufficient

Underlying behaviors of

characteristics more critical

to “fit,” satisfaction and success

Technical Competencies

: Easier to identify and

develop

Behavioral Competencies: Harder to identify

and develop

Skills (e.g.,

presentation delivery)

Knowledge (e.g., MS-Excel)

Social Role (e.g., Leader)

Self-Concept (e.g., I am a Team Player)

Traits (e.g., Analytical

Thinking)

Motives (e.g., Drive to

Achieve)

InitiativeInitiative

1.1. Manage the “white space.” Seek out Manage the “white space.” Seek out responsibility above and beyond the responsibility above and beyond the expected job description. expected job description.

2.2. Undertake extra efforts for the benefit of Undertake extra efforts for the benefit of coworkers or the larger group.coworkers or the larger group.

3.3. Follow-through to completion (don’t Follow-through to completion (don’t delegate to the boss).delegate to the boss).

““To Improve Is to To Improve Is to Change; To Be Change; To Be

Perfect Is to Perfect Is to Change Often”Change Often”

~Winston Churchill

“I believe the single, most significant decision I can make on a day to day basis, is my

choice of attitude. It is more important than my past, my education, my bankroll, my

successes or failures, fame or pain, what other people think of me or say about me, my circumstances, or my position. Attitude is that

“Single String” that keeps me going or cripples my progress. It alone fuels my fire or

assaults my hope. When my attitudes are right, there’s no barrier too high, no valley too

deep, no dream too extreme, no challenge too great for me.”

Charles R. Swindoll