Working with High Conflict Personalities High Conflict Diversion Program™ .

Working with High Conflict Personalities

High Conflict Diversion Program™www.highconflict.net

Prevalence of Personality Disorders

National Institute of Health and National Institute on Results From the Wave 2 National Epidemiologic Survey on Alcohol and Related Conditions study of 35,000 people completed in 2008 and published in the Journal of Clinical Psychiatry show that Personality Disorders in the general population in the United States is around 21.52% (over 1 in 5 have a diagnosable PD). These disorders that are most frequently found in high conflict legal disputes are as follows:

Narcissistic 6.2% (20-29 age group ---9.4%)Slightly more male

Borderline 5.9% (20-29 age group ---9.3%)Equal male and female

Paranoid 4.4% (18-29 age group ---6.8%) Slightly more female

Antisocial 3.6% (18-29 age group ---6.2%)Significantly more male

Histrionic 1.8% (18 -29 age group---3.8%)Equal male and female

Results of Wave II Study


360,000 ofthese Divorces become High

Conflict

1.2 million Divorces (total) in

USAeach year **

Chart Title

World of Divorce Today:

20 – 30% of all divorces in the United States will become High-Conflict.*

Total # of High-Conflict Divorces: (USA)

* University of Utah study 2003** US Census


108,000 High Conflict Di-vorces W/O Psy-

chopathology

1.2 million Divorces (total) in

USAeach year **

252,000 (70%) of High Con-flict Divorces involve Psy-cho-Pathology and/or Sub-

stance Abuse

World of Divorce Today:

20 – 30% of all divorces in the United States will become High-Conflict.*

* University of Utah study 2003** US Census

Understanding Personality Disorders

9. Whisman, M. A., Tolejko, N., & Chatav, Y. Social consequences of personality disorders: Probability and timing of marriage and probability of marital disruption The associations between DSM-IV personality disorders and probability of marriage, early marriage, and marital disruption were evaluated among people that participated in the National Epidemiologic Survey on Alcohol and Related Conditions, which is a nationally representative face-to-face survey of 43,093 respondents, 18 years and older. Participants completed a structured interview for the diagnosis of seven personality disorders, and provided information about the occurrence and timing of marriage and marital disruption. Results suggest that personality disorders were associated with decreased probability of marriage, increased probability of early marriage, and increased probability of marital disruption. These findings suggest that personality disorders have substantial consequences for the probability and timing of marriage and probability of marital disruption.


• Understanding High Conflict• Individuals Role

– Role fear plays

– Future

– Lack

– Abandonment


• Understanding High Conflict• Personality Disorders

– Stress Driven

– Continuum

– Wounds of early bonding and attachment

– Brain development• Incapable of different behavior


• Understanding High Conflict• Personality Disorders• Recognizing PD’s

– Narcissistic

– Borderline

– Paranoid

– Antisocial

– Histrionic

– Bi-polar


• Understanding High Conflict• Attorney’s Role• Role of negative advocate• Defending or attacking in declarations

• Need for greater understanding• Lack of ability for self reflection• Lack of ability to self regulate• More room for process• Need for greater structure• Need for consequences• Need for more direction

• Need for alternative approaches to custody issues

• Understanding High Conflict• Attorney’s Role

• Need for continually creating structure between meetings• Filing interim Stipulations in order to maintain structure between meetings• Stipulations need consequences for breaking them.


Understanding High ConflictTherapists Role

Need for greater understanding of the family court system

Early Identification of PD character symptoms

Need for alternative approaches to intervention in custody issues i.e.: Parental Alienation Syndrome


Understanding High Conflict• Courts Role

– Use of alternative parenting philosophies• Parallel Parenting

– Need for creation of strong parenting plans

– Different use of Therapists• Use as family therapist and parenting coordinator• Training in different methods

High Conflict Diversion Program™www.highconflict

Understanding High Conflict

• Role of Financial Neutral

• Need for training to understand Pd’s core beliefs and how they pertain to financial aspects of the settlement negotiations. • E.g.- Borderline underlying issues of abandonment, money might symbolize a continued attachment to the other person, security, custody my relate to money or may be an emotional crutch for the BPD parent.


• Understanding High Conflict• Courts Role

– Use of alternative parenting philosophies• Parallel Parenting

– Need for creation of strong parenting plans

– Different use of Therapists• Use as family therapist and parenting coordinator• Training in different methods


• Understanding High Conflict

• Neurophysiology– Fight/Flight sequence

– PTSD

– Cognitive intervention and education• Teaching techniques to intervene in sequence


• Establishing Boundaries• PD’s and Boundaries– Push-back (spike in conflict)

• Strategies– Elimination of Contact• The role of the nervous system in continuing

conflict• Stress reduction• Disengagement

–No face-to –face communication–No verbal contact

»Nervous System Cycle (72 hrs)


• Establishing Boundaries

• Exchanges

– Fewer Exchanges• Age appropriate

– Fewer parent initiated phone calls


• Establishing Boundaries

• Need for iron-clad parenting plan

– Exchanges – Holidays

– Phone contact


• Co-Parenting Parallel Parenting

Child focused. Adult focused.

Parents communicate regularly. Parents communicate over emergencies.

Parents can communicate in person or over the phone.

Parents use email, text messaging, or a third party (attorney, mediator or mutually agreed person).

Major decisions about the child are discussed jointly.

Major decisions are “communicated” rather than discussed.

Parents work together as needed to resolve issues related to the child.

Households are separate. Each makes decisions about the child when s/he is in their household.

Parents work together in the best interest of the child.

Parents work separately for the best interests of the child.

Allows smooth transitions from one home to the other.

Culture changes for the child may be abrupt. Use the “transition tradition” to lower the abruptness.

Allows for schedule change – can be flexible and negotiable.

Written parenting plan or court decree is followed exactly. Parents need an external authority.

Parents may be able to discuss issues between other parent and child.

Each parent is responsible for own relationship with child. “I am sorry, this is Mom’s/Dad’s House, we have different rules”.


• Parallel Parenting

• Co-parenting only exacerbates the problem

• Platform for disengagement from the conflict

• Addressing Safety Concerns

– Need for Mental Health Professional for children• Stipulation for same without blaming


• Parallel Parenting Mom’s House/Dad’s House

• Parent/Child empowerment and education

– Development of a comprehensive parenting plan

• Major components

– Precise holiday and exchange

–Component for dealing with future conflict (Mediation)


• Parallel Parenting Mom’s House/Dad’s House• Need for Parent Education for both

parents

– Redirecting parents attention toward the children and away from the conflict.

– Future oriented

– Solution oriented

Working with High Conflict Personalities High Conflict Diversion Program™ .

Documents

highconflict divorces

high conflict legal

study slide

us census slide

greater structure need

future lack abandonment

timing of marriage

age group