WEB Leaders 2013. Parenting Tips for Dealing with the Teen Years Harry Brown, LMFT.

WEB Leaders 2013

Parenting Tips for Dealing with the Teen Years

Harry Brown, LMFT

Natural Helpers Retreat 2012

Natural Helpers Retreat 2013

Survey Results 2013

6th Grade 7th Grade 8th Grade1 Gossip/Rumors

2 Stress

3 Friendships

4 Achieving in School/Bullying harassment

5 Fitting In

6 Peer Pressure

7 Cyber bullying

8 Self-Image

9 Family Issues

10Depression

1 Fitting In/Achieving in School

2 Gossip/Rumors

3 Stress

4 Friendships

5 Girl/Boyfriend

6 Bullying/harassment

7 Self-Image

8 Family Issues

9 Peer Pressure

10Depression

1 Gossip Rumors

2 Stress

3 Fitting In

4 Achieving in School

5 Friendships

6 Self-Image

7 Depression

8 Family Issues

9 Bullying/Harassment

10Girl/Boyfriend Issues

Ten Tasks of Adolescence

1. Adjust to sexually maturing bodies and feelings.

2. Develop and apply abstract thinking skills.

3. Develop and apply a more complex level of perspective taking.

4. Develop and apply new coping skills in areas such as decision making, problem solving, and conflict resolution.

5. Identify meaningful moral standards, values, and belief systems.

Ten Tasks of Adolescence

6. Understand and express more complex emotional experiences.

7. Form friendships that are mutually close and supportive.

8. Establish key aspects of identity.9. Meet the demands of increasingly

mature roles and responsibilities.10.Renegotiate relationships with

adults and parenting roles.

The Five Basics of Parenting Adolescents

1. Love and Connect2. Monitor and Observe3. Guide and Limit4. Model and Consult5. Provide and Advocate

Project on the Parenting of Adolescents Center for Health Communication Harvard School of Public Health

Parenting With Love & Logic101

What style of parent are you?

Helicopter Parent

• Hovers over child and rescues child from the hostile world in which they live

• Makes excuses for child• Protects child from any negative

feelings or consequences• Makes decisions for the child

The Turbo Attack Helicopter Model

Same as a regular Helicopter Parent, except that this parent does not just rescue and defend, they will attack anyone else who holds their children accountable for their actions.

Drill Sergeant

• Commands and directs the life of the child

• Makes many demands and issues orders and threats

• Uses many harsh words and punishment

• Tells the child how to feel and what to do

The Love & Logic Parent:Coach / Consultant

• Provides guidance and consultant services for their children

• Models for child

• Makes sure the child owns the problem, and helps child explore alternatives and make decisions

• Allows child to experience life’s natural consequences

Resources at IMS

• IMS 6th Grade School Counselors, –Dru Klein (A-L)– Jayna Rubin (M-Z)

• MIYFS, Counselor & Prevention Staff–Harry Brown, LMFT, CMHS–Tambi Cork, Prevention Educator

• Teachers • Administrators

Online Resources

• Raising Teens, Havard School of Education Raising Teens: The Ten Tasks of Adolescence/The Five Basics of Parenting Adolescents

• Parenting With Love and Logic• Let's Fight it Together - Cyber Bullying video

(Source info on internet use, understanding the impact of Cyberbullying and the short film, Let’s Fight it Together)

• Stop Bullying Now Information for parents, youth and educators.

Natural Helpers Retreat 2011