TX Citizen 5.9.13

VOLUME TWOI S S U E 190 5 . 0 9 .13

VOLUME TWOI S S U E 190 5 . 0 9 .13

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Devon Martinez: Coolest. Chick. Ever! (2013) Page 14

Devon Martinez: Coolest. Chick. Ever! (2013) Page 14

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table of contents

MEGATORIALJust say “NO” to higher taxes. 4

1st WordThe Chamber of Commerce got tricky with their political ads this week. So we busted ‘em.3

Last WordThe POTUS insists on compliance. We’re going to pass on that. 15

Cover StoryDevon goes bald for

a good cause. 14

12

Sound Out Of TownBecause Austin and San Antonio occasionally have live music too.

SpoilersWe see movies so you don’t have to.

The County ’sMost WantedLook, Mommy! Daddy’s in the paper!

Ask a MexicanGustavo of fends in two languages.

8Citizen SoundcheckThe ONLY guide of i ts kind for

the NB/SM Metroplex!

6Around & About

KFES News! Car show!First Friday! Ghosts!

Advice fromUncle Esel

Got a problem? You will..

DiversionsKaraoke, trivia, pool tourneys, and such.7

10

Citizen HottieRiley!

CalendarStuf f to do. Go do stuf f.

5

11

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Well, things got awkward around the office this week, because as you know, one of our favorite pastimes is taking politicians to task for whatever missteps they might make, and we have a City Council candidate right down the hall. In fact, she’s the person we lease our office space from. To make matters worse, her campaign advertises in the TX Citizen, which puts us in an uncomfortable position. Do we let her have it as we would any other politician, or do we keep the peace at work?

I’m guessing the smart money is on overlooking the situation like the Houston-owned Herald-Zeitung and KGNB radio would. That good judgment is how they won the affections of the city’s elite. But we didn’t build the TX Citizen brand on good judgment, and given that, I’m going to have to call Aja Edwards-Patino out on the carpet for a bad answer to an easy question.

Here’s the deal. We’ve got four bond proposals in front of voters this time around, and Aja made it clear, during her campaign for the District Two Council seat, that she supports issues One, Two, and Three on that ballot, and opposes issue Four. Which is fine. She’s entitled to that position (although the TX Citizen opposes all four proposals, for reasons that Chase Cochran details on page 4.)

What we found odd is that the Chamber of Commerce is running radio ads pushing the entire tax-increase package by telling the public that the Chamber’s Board of Directors unanimously supports all four proposals. Aja is on that Board, and “unanimous” meaning what it does, also means that Aja voted for a proposal that she had publicly stated that she was against. This was her response when we asked her about it:

“I wear many hats. As a Chamber director, I felt the bonds fit in with the Chamber’s goals. As an individual voter, I don’t care for Prop 4.”

This was clearly a bad answer – I mean, loading up the trains to Dachau had an upside for somebody – but a bad deal is a bad deal. So we had to press. What we found out is that the Chamber was, once again, playing

games with the City’s politics. They didn’t ask the Board to decide

on proposals One through Four separately, as they appear on the ballot, but as an entire package. A “yes” vote on any

issue was a “yes” vote to all of them. Aja is in favor of three of

the bond proposals, or 75 percent of the whole, so she went ahead and voted yes. If I were for three out of the four I would have voted “no” because I’ve seen this all-or-nothing tactic used before and I’m wise to that gimmick. But I’m an ancient old man compared to young Aja, so I’m not going to hold that against her.

Anyway, the Chamber went on the radio and used that vote to convince the public that all four tax-increases have the unanimous support of the Board members. Now that we know the directors weren’t permitted to vote on the individual issues, we have to ask ourselves just how many other Board members were put in the same position.

This package-deal voting is how members of Congress get their pork: “If you want our boys in Afghanistan to have body armor you’re going to have to approve this here new bingo hall in my hometown.” In other words, if you want the baby you’ll have to hang on to its bathwater too. Keep that in mind when you consider the Chamber’s endorsement of the bond issues, and remember that each bond issue represents a tax-increase.

The Chamber of Commerce is pushing for higher taxes in a town that throws its revenue at The Scooter Store and (Chamber President) Michael Meek’s salary instead of repairing streets and drainage. We’ve got two footbridges in Landa Park that have been washed out for three years and still aren’t repaired. You’ve seen how Walnut is working out. Broken promises everywhere. Handing them more money to squander isn’t the answer. (Unless your goal is to drive over potholes, sit in traffic on Walnut, swim from one part of the park to another, and put more money into Mr Meek’s bank account, in which case we should keep doing exactly what we’ve been doing.)

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Continued from previous page. As for Aja’s “many hats”, I have to say

that’s another item of concern. The Chamber is already engaged in an incestuous relationship with City Council, forgoing its proper role of lobbying government on behalf of its members in favor a massive payday for its staff. Our Chamber is on the City’s payroll, doing the bidding of government by keeping its member businesses in line, much like Samuel L Jackson did with his “co-workers” in Django Unchained. We don’t need another Chamber of Commerce shill sitting on City Council. I mean, we already have District Three’s Ron Reaves for that.

Which is why we’ll continue to support Aja for the post. As a Chamber Director, she won’t be able to vote on Chamber issues, including Hotel Occupancy Taxes and anything to do with the 4-B Board. The Chamber, after all, makes most of its money from those two piles of cash.

Edwards-Patino is one less vote that the Chamber will be able to control on Council, which could be the biggest coup to come out of this election. Aja doesn’t yet have the insider’s influence to push the Chamber’s agenda on the weaker minds on Council. And consider this: Aja’s young and smart – two qualities that have been missing from City Council for we don’t know how long. Sure, she’s politically green, as made evident from her “two hats” quote, but that could just as well be considered a plus in a town that’s been run by people that have clearly been around the block a few too many times. Plus she’s not a crybaby like the current District Two rep.

Aja’s opponent, (and my Orange County homeboy), Richard LaRochelle, might be a delightful person, but there’d be nothing to stop him from becoming another rubber stamp for the Chamber once he sat down next to Reaves. Aja is outright prohibited from voting on Chamber issues, and we like those odds better.

\m/

Mike ReynoldsPublisher/Editor-in-Chief

Election day is Saturday, May 11.

MEGATORIALBy Chase Cochran

Election Day is Saturday, May 11, here in New

Braunfels, with two City Council races and a

bond election on the ballot. For those who

don’t know, Council Districts One and Two

are up for new leadership, with Councilmen

Zapata and Goodner both at the end of

their maximum terms. While voting for new

Council members is important, it’s not nearly

as important as voting in the bond election.

This proposed bond package affects

almost every single citizen in town. The life of

the bond is at least 20 years, so even those

who have not yet been born will be affected

by this package in the future. The only ones not

affected are our senior (age 65+) residents, as

their taxes are frozen.

The entire bond package is made up of

four propositions addressing streets, drainage,

parks and education. On the surface, this all

sounds pretty good. Who doesn’t want better

streets and drainage, more parks or improved

higher education options? I thought this all

sounded great, too, until I took the time to

research the list on a case by case basis.

Proposition One is for $37.5 million in

street improvements. Great! More money for

streets is exactly what this town needs. But

don’t go pressing that “yes” button too quick.

Over $27 million of that money is earmarked

for just three different projects: Klein Rd, Solms

Road/Morningside Drive and Rueckle Road,

all three of which just so happen to be in

Districts One and Two. Is it coincidental that

these projects are in the same two districts

whose residents are heading to the polls to

elect their Council members? I think not. The

City is betting that the majority of voters in this

election will be from Districts One and Two,

and if they’re correct, the probability of getting

the bonds passed is better by having projects

in those two districts on the ballot.

The left over $10 million will be in

the form of a “blank check” written to the

Public Works Department for “increasing

the life span of streets by restoring existing

pavements to excellent condition without

reconstructing the entire street”. Let me put

that in layman’s terms: The City wants to put

Band-Aids on heart attacks.

We do not currently have management

in place in the Public Works Department to

manage or implement this kind of project

(Walnut Avenue, anyone?). I encourage anyone

considering voting “yes” on Proposition One

to take a drive down a few of the streets that

have had this kind of work done on them in the

past three years: Merriweather Street, Houston

Avenue, Navaho Circle, Grape Avenue,

Oelkers Drive and Woodland Avenue. This

is the Street Department’s idea of “restoring

existing pavements”. They’re not even three

years old, and they’re coming apart. Is this

what we want all over the City? Would you like

this type of repair on your street?

Continued on page 7.


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9 10 11

13 14 15

17 18 19

HAVA MIXER AT THE FLOAT INNKick off the summer with the Hospitality and Visitors Association’s riverside

mixer at The Float Inn! Free food and beverages courtesy of Buffalo Wings and Rings, Cooper’s BBQ and Tri-City Distributors. Thursday, May 9, 5:30 to 7:30pm. The Float Inn is located next to the tube-chute, at 462 E Mill St.

“YOU’RE A GOOD MAN, CHARLIE BROWN”The E.N.A.A.C.T. Family Academy would like to invite you to their 2013

Spring production of “You’re A Good Man, Charlie Brown” at the Tree of Life Church in New Braunfels located on IH-35 South. This production will take place in the Main Sanctuary on Thursday, May 9th at 7:00 PM, Friday, May 10th at 10:00 AM (matinee) and 7:00 PM. Tickets are $6 per person or $5 for groups of 10 or more. Tickets can be purchased online at www.enaact.org or at the door. For group purchases or for more information, please call (830) 626-0320.

DOS RIOS 5K/10K SPLASH AND DASHCypress Bend Park, Saturday, May 11, 8am. Registration begins at

6:30am. Fees: 5K - $35, 10K - $45, Kid Run - $10. All entrants get a free, all day tube chute pass.

HERB APPRECIATION DAYFree program. Samples and herb information, along with herb dealers,

arts, crafts, sample munchies. Conservation Plaza, Saturday, May 11, 9am to 3pm. Admission is free.

MASONS/EASTERN STAR 2013 JOINT BBQ FUNDRAISERSaturday, May 11, 11am to 2pm. Brisket and sausage plates, door prizes, silent

auction, and $5,000 in raffle items. Adults - $10, kids 6 to 12 - $6, free admission for children 5 and under. Tickets at the door, or contact Ron Zipp at 830-629-5600.

TRAINS!Come on out to the very popular “Kids Fun Day” at the New Braunfels Railroad

Museum, on Saturday, May 18, at the railroad tracks near the Brauntex, in the restored 1907 railroad depot. Kids of all ages will have the opportunity to run the model trains and become a Jr. Engineer. The Railroad Museum opens at 10am on Kids Fun Days. For more information, call Howard Young at 210-542-6121.

FIRST ANNUAL CONCERTATHONStudent musicians from Church Hill Middle School, Canyon Middle School

and Canyon High School will take to the stage at Canyon’s Performing Arts Center from 11:30am to 8pm for a grueling exhibition of musical fitness, all in an effort to raise money for their respective band programs. Admission to the concerts is free, with pizza lunch/dinner available for just $6 in the Cougar Cafe. Saturday, May 25.

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Megatorial, Continued from page 4.

Also, the document that the City is using to decide what streets they plan on “fixing” is from 2009. How can a four-year-old study (that the Engineering Department itself has deemed “worthless”) be used to rate the current condition of streets? Road conditions change rapidly, especially on heavier-traveled ones. What was a good street four years ago can be in deplorable condition today. Please, vote “NO” on Proposition One. Force your leaders and City staff to come back with a better-defined plan, and one that spreads the money more evenly across the City.

Proposition Two is for drainage improvement, and comes to us with a $23.6 million price tag. Drainage is a very touchy subject for New Braunfelsers, especially for those of us who lived here through the major floods. There are five projects designated to be done with this money: Alves Lane improvements ($7.33 million), Blieders Creek/German Creek improvements ($8.557 million), Live Oak Avenue/Katy Street improvements ($4.589 million), Panther Canyon erosion control ($424,000) and Wood Road/Landa Street improvements preliminary design ($2.7 million).

That last one is the biggest problem with this proposition. Bond money, especially an amount this large, is for construction-ready projects. The City should not be indebting itself for what is essentially a drawing. Too many times in the recent past, the City has blown millions of dollars on studies and preliminary designs, only to scrap the project afterward and be out the money. To ask the residents to take on a tax-hike to have an engineering firm draw pictures is ludicrous.

The Blieders Creek/German Creek project is not needed at this time. With the Veramendi project getting under way, most, if not all, of the flooding issues in the Blieders Creek watershed will be eliminated. This is not my opinion, this fact is stated in the City’s own bond package literature. To spend nearly $9 million, not knowing if it will even be needed, is a glaring example of sub-par leadership.

The other three projects are ones that do need to be done, and the City knows this. That’s why they’ve grouped them together like this, instead of separating out each project like it should be. But, with half the money going to useless projects, a vote of “NO” must

be given on Proposition Two. The City has to get the message that we’re tired of designs and consultations never coming to fruition. They need to quit doing projects before they know their worth. And they need to quit manipulating the votes by lumping worthy projects with useless ones.

Proposition Three is the next most useless, asking for $20 million for “parks, recreation & open space improvements”. It is comprised of $15.7 million for a Community Recreation Center, $2.5 million for land acquisition for a future sports complex and $1 million for the development of Morningside Park. Here again, the City is asking you to raise your taxes for “maybe” projects.

The sports complex is a prime example. They don’t even have a plan of where this might be built, much less what will be included in it. The City’s literature on this project has verbiage like “could include” and “to be determined”. They’re asking you to pay $2.5 million for a roll of the dice. To give a City that can’t even maintain the sports fields they currently have that kind of money is asking for trouble.

The HEB soccer complex is horrible. The fields are rapt with weeds, ants, holes and low spots and a parking lot that is almost impossible to navigate. The softball fields at Camp Comal are just as bad. If the City would spend just a fraction of what they are asking you for to bring the complexes they currently have up to a usable standard, there would be no need for a new complex.

The Morningside Park development is just like the street projects in Proposition One: Throw in a project that’s in the Council race district, and the probability of getting the proposition passed skyrockets. This project is not needed. The main argument, per the City’s propaganda on the project, is that “the closest park is four miles away”. How many residents in New Braunfels live within four miles of a park? I live in Quail Valley, and the closest park to me is Cypress bend, which is a staggering 6.5 miles away. The City has already spent millions in the pre-development of Fischer Park, and there’s yet to be a single shovel of dirt moved. We’re still waiting, three years later, for a couple of bridges to be built in Landa Park. The last thing the City should be asking for right now is more money for parks. They need to finish what they’ve started before

they take on more work.

Continued on page 13.

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Thu 5.9Black Whale Pub

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Dirty’s Bar & QSteven Roloff & Friends8pm

Freiheit Country StoreOpen Mic w/ Fallon Franklin6pm

Oma Gruene’s Secret GartenJam Night6pm

Phoenix SaloonAdam Johnson5pm

Riley’s TavernZakk Goodman9pm

Adobe VerdeTBA8pm

AJ’s Ale HouseRock & Roll Sing Along Piano Bar Show9pm

Billy’s Ice HouseMatt Begley & Bitter Whiskey8pm

Black & Tan PubTBA9pm

Cheatham Street WarehousePake Rossi, Sterling Finlay, Kyle Reed9pm

Gruene HallShane Smith & the Saints7pm

The Pour HausChris King7pm

River Road Ice HouseKris Gordon8pm

Tavern in the GrueneAdam Johnson & the Pay Me’s8pm

Triple CrownEric Hisaw6pmMamafesta, En Route9pm, $5

Uptown Piano BarAshley Stone8pm

Vino en VerdeRyan Waguespack7pm

Fri 5.10Dirty’s Bar & Q

Bryan Boyce8pm

The Happy CowKim Meeks & Her Bad Habits8pm

Oma Gruene’s Secret GartenThe Blues Buzzards6:30pm

Phoenix SaloonTBA5pmJames Pardo & the Underestimated9pm

Riley’s TavernScott Biram9pm, $8

Adobe VerdeTBA8pm


Billy’s Ice HouseNo Dry County8pm


Cheatham Street WarehouseAdam Johnson Band9pm

Gruene HallShooter Jenningsw/ Uncle Lucius8pm, $15

The Pour HausThe Nick Lawreance Bandw/ Dan McCoy9pm

River Road Ice HouseAustin Allsupw/ Sam Silva & the Good8pm, $5

Tavern in the GrueneTony Taylor8pm

Texas Music TheaterEnd of School PartyVaski, Messinian8pm, $10-$12

Triple CrownRicky Lugo6pmThe Pistolsmiths, Fire in the Pines,The Lonesome Heroes9pm

Uptown Piano BarBarry Adams8pm

Vino en VerdeBeau Daniels Band8pm

Whitewater AmphitheaterEli Young Bandw/ Curtis Grimes8pm, $18.48

Sat 5.11Black Whale Pub

TBA9pm

Dirty’s Bar & QTBA9pm

The Happy CowAdam Johnson8pm

Oma Gruene’s Secret GartenMC & The Mstyx12pmThe Melissa Ludwig Band6pm

Phoenix SaloonPake Rossi Bandw/ Lucas Taylor & Old Soul9pm

Riley’s TavernBen Morris & the Great American Boxcar Chorus9pm

Adobe VerdeTBA8pm


Billy’s Ice HouseLC Rocks8pm, $5


Cheatham Street WarehouseDoug Moreland9pm

Gruene HallBill Hearne Trio1pmThe Marshall Tucker Bandw/ Tom Gillam9pm, SOLD OUT

The Pour HausPoor J Brown9pm

River Road Ice HouseChris Kingw/ Jordan Minor & the Bottom Dollar Band9pm

Tavern in the GrueneSouthern Breed9pm

Triple Crowngo to stereo, Daniel Hart, The Canvas People,Lucas Eason & The Panhandlers9pm, $5

Uptown Piano BarJohn Maclean8pm

Vino en VerdeBrandon Bolin Band9pm

Sun 5.12Oma Gruene’s Secret Garten

Kim Meeks & Her Bad Habits2pm

Phoenix SaloonEthan Ford2pmTBA7pm

Billy’s Ice HouseHope is Contagious BenefitMark McKinney, Brian Keane, Jordan York,Sam Riggs & the Night People, Haley Cole,Kyle Reed Band, Jon Brewer, Reed Brothers,Andrew Wade Band12pm


CITIZEN SOUNDCHECK


CITIZEN SOUNDCHECKGeronimo VFW 8456

Sunday DancePaul Sanchez & Wrangler Country BandFood @ 2, Music @ 3

Gruene HallBret Graham12:30pmMason Ruffner Band5pm

The Pour HausLarry Martin Sweeney & Friendsw/ The Groovehounds6pm

River Road Ice HouseRed Dirt Ramblersw/ Guadalupe Pirates8pm

Mon 5.13Riley’s Tavern

Songwriter Showcasew/ John Whipple

Cheatham Street WarehouseTBA9pm

The Pour HausBryan Boyce & Paul Rogers7pm

River Road Ice HouseTBA8pm

Tavern in the Gruene60 Cycle Hum8pm Triple CrownDavid Harris6pmChief & TheDoomsdayDevice9pm

Tues 5.14The Happy Cow

Open Jamw/ Uncle Daddy8pm

Riley’s TavernMark Sebby & Friends9pm

Watering Hole SaloonChris Vetter8:30pm

Billy’s Ice HouseJason Boland & the Stragglersw/ Austin Gilliam, Aaron Stephens7:00pm

Cheatham Street WarehouseTBA9pm

Geronimo VFW 8456Country Music Show & DanceEd Gary, Pricilla Speed, Hayden JamesFood @ 5:30, Music @ 7

The Pour HausOpen Mic w/ Jon Magill8pm

Tavern in the GrueneRoots & Branches of Americana7pmThe Blooms9:30pm

Triple CrownSamantha Lynn6pm

Wed 5.15Buffalo Wings & Rings

Steven Roloff & Friends7:30pm

Riley’s TavernMichael Fletcher9pm

Watering Hole SaloonTBA8:30pm

Billy’s Ice HouseChris King8pm

Cheatham Street WarehouseKent Finlay’s Songwriters Circle9pm

Gruene HallChubby Knuckle Choir7pm

The Pour HausJoe Woods7pm

River Road Ice HouseBackwater Blvd8pm

Triple CrownDaniel Thomas Phipps6pmBlue Water Highway Band8pm, $5

Uptown Piano BarJohn Maclean8pm

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Fri 5.10Antone’s

The Builders & the Butchers

w/ Whiskey Shivers

9pm, $12-$15

The Continental ClubClub Lineup:

The Blues Specialists, 6:30pm

Two Hoots & a Holler

w/ Chuck Mead & His Grassy Knoll Boys

10pm, $10

Gallery Lineup:

The Robert Kraft Trio, 8:30pm

The Mike Flanigin Trio, 10:30pm, $5

Cowboys DancehallAaron Lewis

7pm, 21+ $17, 18+ $25

Floore’s Country StoreRockin’ H Band

8pm

Hooligan’s Bar & GrillThe Damn Quails

7pm, $6

Red Eyed FlyDead Earth Politics

w/ Snake Skin Prison, Echo Temple

9:30pm, Outside

Sam’s Burger JointPatricia Vonne, The Infidels

8pm, $12-$40

Stetson BarMario Flores & Soda Creek Band

9:30pm

Stubb’s BBQPhoenix Down

w/ Rational Panther, Hair Farmers

9pm, Inside, $10

Thirsty Horse SaloonTBA

8pm

Sat 5.11Antone’s

Girl Guitar Showcase

5pm, $5

The Continental ClubClub Lineup:

Doug Moreland, 3:30pm

Sons of Hercules

w/ Ugly Beats, Go-Wows

10pm, $10

Gallery Lineup:

Scarlett Olson, 8:30pm

The Mike Flanigin Trio, 10:30, $5

Floore’s Country StoreDirty River Boys

w/ Lincoln Durham

8pm, $12

Hooligan’s Bar & GrillAlibi

8pm

Red Eyed FlySomething Called Nothing, Los Super Avengers

9pm, Inside

Fouled Out

w/ The Bad Notes, Madmartigan,

Bitter Heart Society

8:30pm, Outside

Sam’s Burger JointBoDeans

w/ Mike June

8pm, $20-$70

Stetson BarTexas Thunder

9:30pm

Stubb’s BBQBrown Bird

w/ Last Good Tooth

9pm, Inside, $10-$12

Thirsty Horse SaloonKris Gordon

8pm

SOUND TOWNOUTOF

The endings of last week’s top-grossing movies.

New this Week:The Great GatsbyGatsby gets shot and hardly anybody

shows up to his funeral.

Java HeatScary bad-guy Mickey Rourke totally gets

killed. They make you think he’s going to get away, but then he gets killed.

Iron Man III[There is no way we can risk giving away

the ending to Iron Man III.]

Heldover:Pain & GainMarky Mark plays a greedy muscle-head

that, after extorting loads of cash from Monk, tries to off him by getting him drunk and making him drive (like Rollin Hand did with Cary Grant in North by Northwest!) Monk survives and gets justice. The Rock BBQs somebody’s cold, dead hands to burn off the prints. Marky Mark and another guy get sent to death row. True story.

The Big WeddingNot worth spoiling as it already has Robin

Williams in it.

OblivionTom Cruise and Morgan Freeman

smuggle a nuke onto a space station and blow it, and themselves, up. It’s ok though, because there are a whole bunch of Tom Cruise clones walking around.

42Jackie Robinson puts his physical safety

in jeopardy simply by playing a “white man’s sport” in this baseball biopic. The film concludes with Robinson hitting a home run against a Pittsburg Pirates pitcher that had beaned him earlier in the story, and with it takes Brooklyn to the 1947 World Series, which they lose. Everybody gets in the Hall of Fame, and white people everywhere feel better about themselves.

THIS WEEK IN

SPOILERS

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May 11 @ 12 MC & the Mystyx

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May 12 @ 2 Kim Meeks and Her Bad Habits

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Uncle K. Esel is a lifetime resident of our fair city, and is well known for his sage advice on a wide range of topics. If you find yourself perplexed with no one to turn to, send your question to Uncle Esel at: [email protected]. Be sure to write “Question for Uncle Esel” in the subject line of your email.

Dear Uncle Esel,I went out and voted the other day

in district two and there were only two people there. I noticed some comments on a few people’s Facebook about the slow turnout and then I heard the mayor talking about it also. Why do you suppose the turnout is so low?

Thanks, S. Dan

Mr. Dan,I’ve received numerous comments and

questions like yours over the last two days, and I’ve asked a few of my “in the know” contacts if they see it the same way, and what they might attribute the low turnout too.

Seems like we mostly agree that after the last heated election with all the controversy, lies and influence peddling that went on, more than a few people are burned out from elections figuring that nothing changes and their voice don’t change things anyway in light of the city continuing to act like the king. It does become a self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts, as without a huge voice the little voice goes unheeded.

There is also the fact that one district has not had an opposed race in a millennium or many years, but it seems like a millennium. Even so, with numerous projects slated for district one, Esel would expect more people would be voting.

In the end, Uncle Esel thinks that some were just turned off by the last city election with all the underhanded stuff in City Hall and the lies out there about the container ban, and others are just looking at City Hall and throwing their hands up at the lack of change year after year.

Remember, the citizens turned down Walnut and the city still committed tax dollars to it and the mayor pretty much said she would do it again, (she did it on Walnut), on the radio this week. Lovely lady, huh?

Love, K

Herr Esel,I’m embarrassed to have visitors

come here to my city and have them drive on the underpasses of I35. There is always trash and weeds and worse. Why is it that we don’t take more pride in these areas? Who is responsible? Who can we call or write?

Seeking Clean Streets, Shawn

Dear Shawn, You are absolutely right about the

conditions of the Interstate passing through town. First is the fact that they allow huge tree-like weeds to grow in the sidewalks and even in the walls of the overpasses. This growth is actually bad for the structures as some weeds and plants force the concrete or underlying base to separate, water to penetrate and

when eventually removed they leave voids that can undermine the integrity of the structure. The same is true for sidewalks and gutters, especially where they meet with asphalt.

TXDOT is responsible for these areas as well as the mowing of rights of way. Generally, they will mow areas twice a year per state guidelines. Even worse to Esel is the trash and debris that is allowed to accumulate on the roadway. At times it looks like a scene from a movie set in a third world country. Esel has seen complete tires, refrigerator boxes, complete car bumpers and worse sitting on the road for weeks.

Recently we witnessed the danger of debris on the roads when several cars were involved in major mishaps with road debris. Imagine the danger to a motorcycle hitting a 2x4 or big rig tire. If you have complaints or need to alert someone to debris or poor conditions, call TXDOT at (800) 558-9368, and request to be connected to the local TXDOT District office nearest you, and give ‘em heck.

Love, K

Uncle Esel, What’s the deal with all those

Facebook posts that claim to give you free stuff like iPads because they have a bunch that have been opened and can’t be sold in a regular store anymore? Can we get sweet deals this way?

Thank you, Deal Seeker

Dear Seeker,You seek like some sheep who think

everything they see on the Internet is true. Let me tell you how this one works:

1. Internet geek sits there bored after successfully popping eleven face zits

2. Internet geek creates some ad for free iPads, iPhones, or other item.

3. Internet geek provides a link where you can sign up for the free whatever.

4. Internet geek’s friend, another geek invents a virus or Trojan horse that invades your computer and takes your personal information for use as they see fit, or,

5. Internet geek gets you email info and sells it to spammers or just spams you himself making money from the clicks that come from all the prize claiming sheep on Facebook.

6. You get nothing, but you probably shared the post with all your friends because you think it makes you look cool. You don’t.

Love, K

ADVICE FROM

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MOST WANTED

$200REWARD

COMAL COUNTY ’S

CARREON,MICHAEL AMADORMale • 5’08” • 230 lbsDOB: 07/11/1969CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for driving while intoxicated 3rd or more

CHENU,DAVIDMale • 5’09” • 135 lbsDOB: 08/22/1978CHARGE: Bail jumping and fail to appear felony

GONZALES,KATHLEENFemale • 5’01” • 130 lbsDOB: 04/13/1991CHARGE: Motion to proceed with adjudication for evading arrest detention with vehicle

DUGLAS, JOZAIER TYRONE IIMale • 5’11” • 185 lbsDOB: 08/07/1973CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for credit card or debit card abuse

BROWN,SARAH ELAINEFemale • 5’01” • 130 lbsDOB: 03/19/1985CHARGE: Motion to proceed with adjudication for possession of a controlled substance pg 1 under 1 gram

HOLMES,RICHARD JOSEPH

Male • 6’01” • 175 lbsDOB: 02/28/1988CHARGE: Three

counts of motion to adjudicate for burglary of building with intent

to commit theft

OTTINGER,BRUCE LEE

Male • 5’09” • 140 lbsDOB: 02/02/1963

CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for

theft over $1500 under $20,000 public servant

WILSON,STEPHEN DANEMale • 6’04” • 230 lbs

DOB: 11/01/1979CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for

aggregated theft over $750 under $20,000

ZUNIGA,ADAM

Male • 5’09” • 165 lbsDOB: 04/30/1965CHARGE: Motion

to revoke probation for obstruction or

retaliation

SCARBOROUGH,WALTER

MERVEL JRMale • 5’09” • 190 lbs

DOB: 11/06/1958CHARGE: Motion to revoke probation for bail jumping and fail

to appear felony

The names listed have been released in accordance with the Texas Public Information Act Code 552.001 st.seq.annotated Public Record and Information disclosure statues. This is a true and accurate account as of Monday, May 6, 2013 at 10:35 am and may not be current by the time it is read. Do not try to apprehend anyone. For anonymous tips and rewards, please contact Crime Stoppers at: 24-Hour Phone number 830.620.3400; Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm 830.620.3411. These are listings of criminal warrants with the Sheriff’s Office and are not indicative of guilt or innocence. Officers are to verify the status of each warrant prior to making an arrest. Any person is innocent of wrongdoing unless proven guilty in a court of law.

FOR INFORMATION LEADING TO THE ARREST OF COMAL COUNTY’S MOST WANTED. Callers will remain anonymous. 830.620.3400 - 24-Hour830.620.3411 - Mon-Fri 8am to 5pm

By Gustavo Arellano

Dear Mexican: Why is it that people

from Chihuahua and Monterrey are

such jackasses? They come from

pinches ranchitos and talk about their

haciendas, They cross the border and

act as if their cagada does not stink.

Why do pinches chihuahuenses act

as if they are better than us American

citizens? They eat at all-you-can-eat

$6.99 buffets and still want to take a

plate to go for their abuela and primos

and try to feed the whole familia.

They stay at our hotels and treat

the maids like rats, as if they were

conquistadores. They speak loud as

if every one wanted to hear what they

have to say—they are not E.F. Hutton.

They think that their putos pesos can

buy anything, When you ask them

where do they come from, they start

by telling you that their abuelos are

Spaniards and most of their familia

are Spaniards as if they are ashamed to

be called mexicanos. The women wear

their pantalones so tight that when

they walk, they go up their puto culo,

with their fake blond hair. Please tell

those cabrones chihuahuenses and

putos monterreyes que cool down,

they are just as Mexicans as the rest of

us, that they still smell like frijoles and

are not Spaniards.

Hernan Cortez

Dear Gachupín: Nothing like some intra-

Mexican hatred to prove that the idea of a

Mexican nation united for Reconquista is as

realistic as a Mexican government free of narco

money! Your specific insults toward people

from the Mexican state of Chihuahua (or, as

they’re known in El Paso, fronchis) and city of

Monterrey (their nickname is regiomontanos)

marks you as someone from Texas, as that’s

where the majority of immigrants from northern

Mexico have landed. And the reason they

act so uppity isn’t so much because of where

they’re from but what they are: ricos who have

fled the chaos of their home states for the

safety of Texas, where pompous, ostentatious

pendejos are not only welcomed, they become

governors and presidents.

I’m a gabacha...kind of. I was born

here but my padres are mexicanos.

So I’m a gabachacana. Anyway my

question is in regards to fixing my

authentic mexicano’s papeles. He’s

23, and I heard that once you’re past

18, it’s harder to do it. He’s never been

in trouble with the law, he pays taxes

and he’s a hard worker. But I heard

that even all that would do him no

good and if I go through trying to fix

his papers, he would need to spend

like 10 years in Mexico. Now, I’m a

patient person, but que chingado

man? I’m not gonna risk him meeting

some paisana hoochie over there and

having me wait 10 years for him. So,

what steps can I take to prevent such

an atrocity? What would you suggest

be the best way to go about in fixing

his papers without the risk of having

him meet some skeezer down south?

Gabachacana

Dear Wabette: While I’m all for

people making up ethnic labels to describe

themselves, gabachacana makes you sound

like an apricot. The easy answer is marrying

the chavo—you’re still going to face a long

process, but it’s faster than waiting for the

Obama administration to make Dios-knows-

how-many deals with labor, the Mexican

government, and Republicans to offer a

“comprehensive immigration reform” that’s

as comprehensive as a tortilla chip covering

a bowl of birria. Better yet, why not just

move to Mexico with him? As I’ve said

before, Mexico is the true land of liberty

now, a libertarian paradise that becomes

more and more appealing as technocrats up

here try to game the system for themselves

and make los Estados Unidos into just

another Mexico–oh, wait…

Ask the Mexican at [email protected], be his fan on Facebook, follow him on Twitter @gustavoarellano or ask him a video question at youtube.

com/askamexicano!

ASK A MEXICAN!

!

TXCITIZEN.COM 13

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Megatorial,

Continued from page 7.

Last on this is list is another pie in the sky,

wish-list project: a new recreation center. Here

again, the City’s own literature is full of “coulds,

shoulds and maybes”. They don’t even have a

location in mind to build this thing, much less

concrete plans of what it will include. They’re

asking you to fund an idea.

How can they put a price tag on an idea?

If this passes, the chances are quite high that

once underway, there will be the need for

more and more money, which will come from

your wallet. They should not be asking for you

to raise your taxes without a definite plan for

what this project is to entail. Until the City can

show us in black and white, and not ask us

to “imagine the possibilities”, a “NO” vote is

warranted on Proposition Three.

The final proposition up for vote is the

$4 million expansion of the Central Texas

Technology Center (CTTC). This is the biggest

waste of money of the four. There are a few

facts that most people don’t know about the

CTTC. For instance, this is not a City-run

school. The City owns the building, but the

Alamo Community College District (ACCD)

runs the school. This is important.

The City is asking you to pay for a school

that its own residents have to pay almost triple

enrollment costs to attend. Since it is an ACCD

school, if the student does not live in Bexar

County, they’re considered to be out-of-district,

therefore having to pay close to three times the

amount of tuition of a Bexar County resident.

Why are you being asked to fund

someone else’s school, that if you were to

attend, you’d be paying triple that of someone

who doesn’t even live in New Braunfels? If

the ACCD thinks they need more room at the

campus, then they either need to foot the bill

themselves, or if they want New Braunfels to

pay for it, drop the out-of-district designation

on our residents. For these reasons, a “NO”

vote is more than justified on Proposition Four.

The City and proponents of the package are

advertising how “cheap” it is to get all these

passed. They’re telling you that it will only

be a $115 per year increase, or $9.60 per

month, on a $130,000 home. While that is

correct right now, it doesn’t hold true for the

life of the loan. Your property values will go

up, especially over a 20 year span. It’s almost

a guarantee that your school taxes and county

taxes will also be increased at least once

during that time. They somehow forgot to

include that info in their propaganda. A minor

oversight, I’m sure.

Simply put, when each proposition

is taken apart and each project is looked

at individually, a vote of “NO” is needed

across the board. What should have been

presented to voters was a separately

itemized list of projects. To group worthy

projects with wish list items is a slap in the

face of the New Braunfels voter.

The City is forcing an ultimatum upon

you: “If you want “x”, then you’ll have to

take “y” and “z” along with it.” This isn’t

right. Your City shouldn’t be imposing a hefty

tax hike on you to fund coulds, shoulds and

maybes. The entire package should be voted

down and brought back at the next election,

all as separate projects. Please, join me in

casting a “NO” vote on all four propositions,

and force our leaders to let us vote the right

way, not their way.TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM

TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COMTXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM TXCITIZEN.COM











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"I am volunteering to walk across the stage at graduation bald, because these kids don't have a choice to lose their hair. Last year I had the pleasure to meet and get to know a wonderful little girl, with as much as she was going through fighting cancer, she never failed to make people smile. She recently passed away but left an impact on my life and many others. No child should ever have to go through the fight of their lives, but the reality is that some have to and all us healthy people can do is show them love and support."

This is Devon Martinez. Devon had a lot of hair. So much hair, in fact, that she was able to raise, as of press time, $760 for the St Baldrick’s Foundation simply by agreeing to shave it off! And just before she graduates from Canyon High School!

Last Saturday, she reported to The Fixx salon on Walnut Avenue where stylist Lauren Kinsey expertly extracted four pretty substantial pony tails from Devon’s scalp before shaving it down to its current, stubbly state. Both Devon and her mom shed a few tears as her new look took shape, but in the end the entire Martinez family left The Fixx with big smiles on their faces, not to mention four ponytails that will be donated to create wigs for kids undergoing treatment for cancer.

Devon’s original goal was to raise $500 toward childhood cancer research, and while she’s already beat that number by $260, you can still donate on behalf of her new haircut. Logon to www.stbaldricks.org, and search for Devon Martinez, or call St Baldrick’s at 888-899-2253 to donate by phone. Her participant number is 636622.

A Close Shave for Charity!

Ponytails!Ponytails!

Tears!Devon!

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Last WordWith Kelly Colby

Tyranny isn’t lurking around the corner. It’s standing right in front of you.

This week, at a commencement address for the students of Ohio State University, President Obama was inspiring. He asked the graduates to “participate and persevere.” Nothing could be more important to the continuation of American democracy. Somewhere along the line, though, Obama seems to have inserted his own criteria for participation and perseverance, indicating that he is far more interested in compliant supporters than he is in thoughtful citizens. Consider this quote:

“Unfortunately, you’ve grown up hearing voices that incessantly warn of government as nothing more than some separate, sinister entity that’s at the root of all our problems; some of these same voices also doing their best to gum up the works. They’ll warn that tyranny is always lurking just around the corner. You should reject these voices. Because what they suggest is that our brave and creative and unique experiment in self-rule is somehow just a sham with which we can’t be trusted.”

After setting up a straw man to savage and taking a quick potshot at the opposition after expressly saying he wouldn’t just a few paragraphs before, Obama reinforces his apparent belief that we must all accept, without question, the sagacity of our elected officials. Not surprisingly, this wasn’t a belief the president subscribed to during the previous administration when he was part of the loyal opposition. Now that he is in control, though, true citizenship depends on trusting our elected officials; anything less is a slap in the face to our founding ideals.

Only one word is needed to respond to such an interpretation of American founding principles – Balderdash!

The idea that our founders were somehow creating a system where elected representatives should be trusted blithely with their power is nothing short of nonsense. Our founders had a healthy distrust for government, having just rid themselves of an oppressive one. They argued at length about what checks and balances might be included in the system to stymie government overreach. Eventually, it was decided that even the carefully layered

authorities, powers and limitations created in the Constitution were insufficient to restrain the “sinister entity” that was government. The Bill of Rights was required to arrive at the necessary consensus.

Not content with agonizing over the wording of our founding documents to prevent governmental tyranny, the founders entered government themselves and proceeded to provide concrete examples of how government might ignore the Constitution at will. The response to the Whiskey Rebellion, the judiciary act of 1789, the Alien and Sedition Acts, the institution of a national bank and the Louisiana Purchase are all of questionable constitutionality. Apparently, the founders were on to something when they posited that government was less than trustworthy.

Fortunately, the American people have taken the words of the founders to heart over their actions. Today’s America is, indeed, hopelessly infected with a strain of skepticism of government, for which there appears to be no cure. So far, I would argue that this has served us well. It’s ironic that today the very people that had complete disdain for “The Man” are now “The Man” themselves, and find public disdain a bit irritating.

Additionally, the hubris of the current administration at having their motives and veracity questioned is mindboggling.

Lest we forget, the Obama administration was supposed to be free of lobbyists and their corrupting influence. This pledge lasted roughly until the president removed his hand from the Bible on Inauguration Day. Even Politifact, a source mostly in the tank for the current administration, rates this promise as broken. This is only a stunning lack of follow-through if you are wearing the rose-colored glasses Obama was passing out for his commencement speech. Otherwise, it’s something that the typical American skeptic just shrugs at.

Obamacare, the president’s signature legislative achievement, provides its own reinforcement of perpetual American skepticism. The $2500 savings in healthcare costs we were supposed to receive has turned into an all too typical increase for most and a napalm strike to the budget for some. Obama should be thankful

that most of us are just too jaded to have ever believed that Obamacare would represent a net savings to us budgetarily. The continued increase in costs has caused most of us to groan and shake our heads in disgust, but Obama will be safely out of office by the time it balloons to horrific proportions.

Most recently, the Obama administration has shown itself to be completely dependable (or at least consistent) with respect to foreign policy. This week several Benghazi whistleblowers are scheduled to appear before Congress. Already, most of us are prepared to hear how the administration went out of its way to distort the story for political expediency. Again, can you imagine the uproar if we had not been convinced that they were full of it from day one?

And it seems that Obama’s threats are just as empty as his promises. So far, the administration has been franticly looking for an escape hatch concerning the “red line” drawn for Syria. Apparently, the significant response to the use of chemical weapons in Syria has been a resounding “meh”. Not that I am personally unhappy about this. Another poorly planned intervention in the Middle East is the last thing we need. Even so, it might be worthwhile to more carefully consider the way we issue ultimatums. At some point our allies and enemies might stop taking us seriously.

Certainly, the government cannot be blamed for all of the country’s ills. I don’t think anyone has ever suggested as much. It does have its fingerprints all over a lot of them, though. Distrust of government is a great American tradition. Our young adults and particularly our graduates should be encouraged to “participate and persevere,” but a good part of that is being eternally vigilant with regards to the dangers of government. I can see no value in encouraging sheepish acceptance of what government tells us. It’s un-American and likely to lead to unnecessary disillusionment.

“Government is not reason; it is not eloquent; it is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master.” - George Washington

You can read more from Kelly Colby at yourfirstshrug.blogspot.com.

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