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Summary INTRO DUCT ION....... ............................................................…………….. …………..PAGE 3  Chapter I. The importance of family socialization process in the future integration of the child I.1 The concept of socialization. Theoretical delimitation...............................................PAGE 5 I.2 The roles of parents in the psychological development of the child..........................PAGE 12 I.3. Educational types of the parents and their effects on the development of the child ................................................................................................................. ...................P A GE 21 Chapter II. The kindergarten a socialization factor 
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THE INFLUENCE OF KINDERGARTEN ACTIVITIES ON THE PROGRESSIVE DEVELOPMENT OF THE CHILD’S SOCIAL SKILLS

Apr 05, 2018

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    Summary

    INTRODUCTION.......................................................................PAGE 3

    Chapter I.

    The importance of family socialization process in the future integration of the childI.1 The concept of socialization. Theoretical

    delimitation...............................................PAGE 5

    I.2 The roles of parents in the psychological development of thechild..........................PAGE 12

    I.3. Educational types of the parents and their effects on the development of thechild....................................................................................................................................PAGE 21

    Chapter II.

    The kindergarten a socialization factor

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    II.1The teacher and the group of elderly-factor ofsocialization.....................................PAGE 27

    II.2 Kindergarten Social Skills

    Activities........................................................................PAGE 34Chapter III.

    Research on how the sociability of the pre-scholars varies over

    time...PAGE 43

    III.1. Methods andtechniques.........................................................................................PAGE 52

    Chapter IV.Conclusions andrecomandations.............................................................................. PAGE 54

    Bibliography...P

    AGE 55

    THE INFLUENCE OF KINDERGARTEN ACTIVITIES ON THE PROGRESSIVE

    DEVELOPMENT OF THE CHILDS SOCIAL SKILLS

    INTRODUCTION

    The entire development, as well as the human condition itself, are flooded and stimulated

    by the socializing processes by which the social integration and personal identity are

    constituted. The influences are exerted upon the child first through the family and in a

    more orderly and systematic manner with the help of the educational institutions, through

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    social life, as a whole, as factors which concur on offering them behaviour models, clichs

    of appreciation and reactions, opinions and knowledge of everything which surrounds

    them. The child, as an adult to be and not as an adult in miniature, owns specific traits due

    first of all to the age and then to the fact that every individual of the human species is

    unique, traits which will become adjusted or maladjusted behaviours, depending on the

    quality of the influences exerted upon him.

    The habits with which the child is born and with which he develops are influenced by

    certain experiences, as they grow up and their innate vulnerability or vivacity interacts with

    the facilitative character of the surrounding environment. A strong environment is that

    where the child has loving and sensitive parents and is provided with rich and stimulating

    effects, so that favourable conditions will appear in this type of ambient environment,while a child raised in a poor unsatisfying environment will live an enormous disadvantage.

    The family environment is most directly linked to the harmonious development of the

    child, bearing a decisive role in the growth of the child and, under the conditions where it

    permanently satisfies the need for affective support and protection and offers the premises

    on which psychological and social models will be structured, it will manage to valorise

    entirely the biological potential of the child. It is the system in which the child has

    experiences, observes activity and interaction models or patterns they develop under therelationships between the family members.

    The roles which the parents fulfil, mainly affective and communicative functions and

    especially through the mother, create the ulterior conditions for the actions of the teachers,

    of those who, in their turn, will influence the later development of the child. The

    importance of these roles resides from the fact that the young being acquires everything

    that they observe around, their behavioural manifestations being counterparts to the

    behavioural models, action and communication types within the family so that the childs

    conduct will be dependent on the values, necessities and norms the parent manifests, as

    main architectures of the social being of the child. The parents have the role to model the

    objective reality for them, selecting the aspects which will be transmitted, working as a

    filter between the child and the reality and ensure them, through their answers, the optimal

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    setting to develop and learn. The intervention of the parent as a development factor helps

    the child develop adequate habits of social interaction, first of all by satisfying their

    physical and emotional needs, by preparing the grounds for communication, allowing them

    to try new things which they are not capable of yet, adapting a specific activity so that they

    can handle it and, especially, functioning as a data base for the child, which helps them to

    organize the information and elaborate plans.

    The sociability, as a trait which has the capacity to facilitate the adaptation, develops

    through the unification of numerous specific habits, which have the same general adaptive

    significance for a person, so that the sociability is structured depending on the conditions of

    the exterior environment. The preschooler child manifests an intense sociability, a powerful

    desire for social contact, but they are not generally sociable, as they learn through specificlearning units, to reach an adaptive and expressive behaviour. Thus, it can be said that the

    evolution of the child is marked by the interactions between them, as developing

    individuals and the others, by the interest which they start showing to the others, with

    which they discover they can act together. The kindergarten ensures the enlargement of the

    personal experience, and especially the conditions of a wealthy varied social activity, in

    which and through which the child will manage to take over the initiative of the social

    contact more frequently, maybe than the adult and he will elaborate relationships of trustwith others and will become aware of his place and role inside the group.

    CHAPTER I

    The importance of family socialization process in the future integration of the child

    I.1 The concept of socialization. Theoretical delimitation

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    The process of socialization is a social process in which the human individual, active

    member of the society undergoes successive transformations, a continuous interaction

    process, unequal as intensity, which offers to a potential social being the possibility to

    develop an identity, an ensemble of ideas, a set of habits. The essence of this process is that

    the society tries, through socialization agents, to transform the individual so as to

    correspond to its norms and values. Through socialization, the child is guided towards the

    acquirements of lifes rules, habits, the way of thinking, beliefs and ideals in accordance

    with the social environment in which they grew up. In a widely accepted assertion,

    socialization means assimilation of social experience (knowledge, norms, ideals and roles),

    the formation of action capacities, conceptions, personality traits, social intelligence,

    necessities development, motivations and personal and collective aspirations.

    In psychology, the socialization process of the child is considered an essential aspect of the

    personalitys development, the research in this direction laying on the theories of some

    renowned personalities such as L.S. Vgotski, J. Piaget. H. Wallon, each one centred on

    certain aspects of the childs socialization. L.S. Vgotski outlines the fact that socialization

    is a permanent confrontation of the child with his social environment in which they learn

    the language, thus reaching the socialization of their thoughts and ideas. J. Piaget

    underlines the role of the knowledge of the psycho-hereditary patrimony within theevaluation of the results obtained and of those monitored in the socialization process,

    because, due to the hereditary characteristics of the child, the process of socialization isnt

    reduced to fixing certain fingerprints on a tabula rasa

    At the same time, Piaget states that in the realization of socialization through interactions,

    spontaneous or guided, between human-human and human-object, an important role is

    being held by the connections with the worlds. Socialization comprises, in balance, the two

    processes of adjustment to the environment when its requested to respect rules and

    norms and assimilation of the environment, dimensions of which equilibrium condition a

    constructive socialization, built on phases. As every phase is based on the acquirements of

    the anterior one, if a phase is not covered, the next one cannot be well constructed, thus

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    reaching deviant behaviours, affective and intellectual handicaps, created by those who

    take action directly on the childs personality development.

    Socialization is regarded through the dynamics of the two factors represented by the social

    environment and individual, in the sense that social learning takes place under the influence

    of the social context, a part of which being the individual, who thus becomes both

    socialised and socialising agent. The research in this field starts from the idea that society,

    the value system and culture influence the person more through smaller groups such as

    family, kindergarten, peers, school, drawing attention on the priorities of the interpersonal

    relations as factors influencing the mental development of the child.

    In every society, family represents the essential factor of development and socialization ofthe child, as fundamental frame in which their psychological and social needs are satisfied

    and their entire growing and development system is fulfilled, first integrating community

    which conditions all ulterior acquirements. During childhood, the primary socialization

    takes place, represented precisely by this childrens process of turning into social human

    beings, by learning the basic values, preparation and language, process with profoundly

    affective character, unlike the other socialization forms, secondary and continuous,

    oriented towards affective neutrality Primary (or basic) socialization allows theacknowledgment of the mannerism rules, of the values and norms which can be assimilated

    at early age and which represent the informational affective baggage of every individual.

    A positive development from a psychological and social point of view is realized with

    children when they are raised in families, by their parents.

    During childhood, socialization has a powerful maternal character, associated to a certain

    point, with the intense influence of the father. The initiation of the child into human life,

    their learning of the main methods of evolution towards an autonomous behaviour, learning

    of the language, acquiring values take place in the relationship with the mother, as the first

    model from which they acquire knowledge and assimilates habits. Social elementary

    behaviours are acquired by the child by simply observing and imitating external

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    behavioural models, imitation being for a child one of the most important way to

    accumulate social experience, learning types of behaviour and adapting to certain

    circumstances and contexts of life. The assimilation of complex social behaviours

    attitudes, beliefs, mentalities, purposes and reasons is insured by other ways of social

    learning which continue the process of imitation. Identification is one of these ways, as

    knowledge process which offers an explanation of the way in which the child learns a new

    behaviour, the social roles and how they develop the internal control and conscience.

    Identification represents a fundamental process in the socialization of the child, which

    incorporates rules, behaviour types which he transforms into a way of being adequate, so as

    not to be submitted to isolation or even social marginalization.

    During childhood, the self-conscience starts: on the course of their identification as the onewho starts actions and verbalizing this relationship, the child assimilates the certainty of his

    identity. The identity is acquired by the fusion between the subject and its model, so that

    the child, in compliance with the parental model, will build himself, will feel he exists and

    will recognise himself by referring to others, both as a singular being and identical with the

    others. Through the relationship within the family, of the communication and experience,

    the child will inherit personal identity, the feeling of ones own, feeling essential to the

    ulterior adjustment to changes and he will avoid the appearance of personality disorders, hewill be capable to nourish adequate relationships with others, he will be preoccupied for

    others, he will develop a cooperative and humanist behaviour, he will be trustful and

    untouched by the identity crisis. The parents will help them overcome the crisis specific to

    childhood, important moments in strengthening the ego, and if they positively orient these

    oppositions then the child will easily adapt and will show the capacity to action according

    to social models. By not assimilating their own identity, it will determine them to become a

    social victim, a young being in drift frustrated and lacked of realistic hopes. The

    acquirements of this phase are based on the opening to the world, extremely important as it

    offers a guiding to the world, outlining the limits of ulterior receptivity of the individual

    and building the first universe of the child as universe of significance and reality which

    they interiorise making it their own. The family is the most important socializing agent, the

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    place where the children learn to become humans and they start the basic social behaviours,

    their socialization function taking place in four different specific situations:

    - the moral education situation which is based on the authority relationships with

    the help of which the child receives moral rules, the family being the main frame in which

    they assimilate the first notions regarding duty, responsibility and interdiction, marking the

    development of a generalized structure of the moral conscience;

    - the cognitive learning situation through which the child learns the knowledge

    system, attitudes and skills necessary to coexist in the society.

    - the situation which involves imagination, developing the participative thinking

    and the creative capacities;

    - the psychological communication situation through which the affectivity

    specific to humans develops, necessary to acquiring a moral and psychological balance.By tracing the development of the childs personality, the socializing process can

    be viewed as having an intentional character, as a result in which the child acquires

    desirable behaviours so as to integrate in the social life.

    Only by transmitting this guidance lines for the personality development, the child can

    become human, in a social meaning, as they profoundly internalize the forming methods

    exerted by the parents, at the level of his developing personality structure. The child mustbe helped in the direction of integration preparation, and the family, as the first group with

    which the child has continuous contact, starts the process of their modification in an

    individual which will be capable to function and evolve coherently and productively in the

    future. Socialization develops in a child the constant mental traits by which they receive an

    identity in reference to the others, and the family represents the matrix in which this

    identity is formed. The psychic traits socialization develops are not innate, they are

    acquired during the first years of life, determining a constant and well-defined way of

    being.

    The privileged instrument of socialization and its content is language, by the integration

    through which the child receives behaviour models, applicable immediately or in ulterior

    situations for the daily life. Socialization is realized first of all through language, learned by

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    the child from adults in the daily experience, being the first and the most important tool

    the child must possess, the instrument with which they can act upon others and they can

    assimilate great knowledge and numerous abilities and which will ease the adjustment and

    conquering of the surrounding environment.

    At first, words mean nothing to the child, being simple sonorities, but, as they are

    associated with the same objects and beings they acquire meaning: meanings are assigned

    depending on the experience the child acquires; they are corrected and mentioned by the

    parents, and later, by society. Learning terms means assimilating a vocabulary which

    includes knowledge, the parents life experience and implicitly of the society they are part

    of. Through language, the parents act upon the child, following the coordination of their

    activities, triggering some actions or reactions, communicating them affective states,especially emotions and feelings, by different expressions.

    The progress of language learning is realized at the same time with the thinking process

    and, by learning to communicate, the child heads to a more and more complex organization

    of the thinking process, which will help them explain to themselves the important aspects

    of reality and to solve problematic situations, inherent in their life. Starting from a thinking

    process involving movement and perception, the child will reach the ability to usededuction, but only in the presence of language, helped of course by the adult, on the

    course of their psychological development.

    This knowledge that they acquire couldnt be valued if they wouldnt learn adequate

    abilities. Through experience and growth, the child develops aptitudes and abilities as the

    parents, exemplifying and involving them in the fundamental activities of the human being:

    playing, learning and working, they encourage their development, essentially submitted to

    the contexts of the environment.

    This is why the favourable character of the family environment conditions: education,

    stimulation, appreciation and value, will influence decisively the structuring and

    manifestation of the aptitudes. By permanently stimulating the child, the parents not only

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    develop their sensory and motor aptitudes so that they would be able to perform direct

    actions with and upon objects, in order to satisfy some current needs, but also intellectual

    abilities specific to all human beings which will allow them to adapt well to the

    universe characteristic to every age and in the future they will form their capacity to handle

    social situations, to relate and understand well with their peers. The improvement the

    personal predilections must always be in the attention of the family, so that the hereditary

    potential is being exploited properly.

    Primary socialization involves, besides cognitive dimension an important affective

    dimension. The child identifies emotionally with the important persons in his life, taking

    over their roles and attitudes and transforming them into his own and living world as the

    only possible world, his own, reality itself.

    The advantage of family socialization is that it takes place within an affectivity climate

    which facilitates the transmitting and assimilation of the values and social norms. The

    nature of the contacts with the others around and the socio-affective climate generates and

    supports emotional experiences of a certain quality, it forms corresponding attitudes and

    adjustments. The positive role of the family within the socialization process is

    demonstrated through the nature of the particular and diversified bond uniting themembers, by the securing role necessary to the growth of the child, by the fact that, due to

    its permanence, it teaches the children to live in the durable.

    No manifestation of affection must be stopped or blocked so as not to create a climate

    which is less favourable to the growing and the personality development. The family, as an

    affective environment offers through tenderness the psychological vitamin necessary to

    the childs growth and the lack of this nutritive spiritual function represents one of the

    parents flaws. The affective factors bear the greatest importance in this situation and the

    family climate must be characterized by love, relaxed and open relationships, so that it

    wont cultivate in them the fear of mistaking, provoking them fears or emotional

    blockage. The environmental life must be organized with the most adequate and efficient

    modalities under the principle of active and participative learning, as a base for the ulterior

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    motivation, which facilitates the transformation of the environmental influences and family

    education in mental components.

    It can thus be asserted that the importance of the family during the first years of life is so

    overwhelming that it gives birth to some kind of a determinism of the future trajectory and

    that the integration is in most of its part determined by the acquisitions made during

    childhood through socialization, subsequently the child building the reality he knows, from

    the perspective of his knowledge.

    So as to resume, it can be said that socialization forms education, the control of instincts

    and needs, satisfying them in a way set by society, inoculates aspirations and allows the

    transmission of knowledge and ensures the existence of the qualities necessary in life. Byacting upon the personality traits, the family facilitates the transition from a normative

    behaviour, adjusted by the exterior, to a normal behaviour represented by the fact that the

    young being will be characterized by self-adjustment and moral autonomy.

    The influence the society exerts through the family is colossal, the child being entirely

    enlightened in report to the society of which they are part of and the family starts, based on

    a specific psychological configuration, to develop their fundamental personality.

    By respecting the interior model of the child, but aiming at the idea of organising and

    modelling the personality, the family must target the construction of an individuality

    characterized by harmony. The parents convey values, beliefs and conceptions on the

    world, knowledge, customs and language, and the evolution of the childs personality

    results by integrating these significations, criteria, symbols and action models.

    The family creates the ground for the childs adaptation so that they integrate appropriately

    in the psycho-social field, by reporting to the rules of the society. The integration results

    from the formation of a mental unity and totality. Through the competition of the internal

    and external environment of the child, a full and unitary development of their traits is

    reached, their own construction which defines them as individuals, a typical and unique

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    behaviour, and specific to a rightly balanced personality. By not respecting the ensemble of

    socially elaborated norms and values, the parents will form in the child a system lacking

    personality, cause of a precarious balance and source of some adaptation impediments.

    Although the role of the family changes as the child develops, its social responsibility

    portrait doesnt decrease its intensity, as the other socializing agents permanently underline

    its importance. Even if the attitude towards the parents switches from the affective-

    symbolic closeness to other relationships types (requested by its psychological traits in

    development) the child will always feel the need for family, which will continuously

    manifest its support in order to overcome the next dramatic episodes during puberty and

    teenage years.

    I.2. The roles of the parents in the psychological development of the child

    The entire psychological and moral development of the child stands under the influence of

    the family environment in which they evolve, environment which is the first intermediary

    in the social relations,

    Claude Levi-Strauss defined family through the point of view of the commune aspirations

    and obligations of the married couple which have the duty to raise their family by ensuring

    them not only the financial support but also an affective and moral favourable climate. The

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    family represents the oldest and most stable form of human community, which brings its

    share not only by perpetuating the species but by bearing an essential role in the evolution

    and continuity of social life.

    The individualization of the family as a social group, in report to other groups, resides in

    the fact that in its interior a certain life style practice, behaviour, norm and value models

    reside, which are passed on from generation to generation, leading to the social role of the

    family in forming the individuals personality.

    Taking into account that the family members are also society members, the family

    fulfils roles, which other groups cannot fulfil, towards society as a whole.

    By procreating, caring for, forming and educating the children, the family

    contributes to the maintenance of the biological continuity of the society;

    By passing on the cultural inheritance in the process of socialization, it presents

    the function of maintaining the cultural continuity;

    It satisfies the emotional needs of its members, thus ensuring feelings of

    comfort and maintenance of the personality;

    It exerts social control on the entire behaviour of its members, especially of its

    children;

    As an agent with a predominant role in forming and developing the young being and as a

    primary group with which the child keeps continuous contact, the family is obliged to

    ensure them an affective and protective environment, to satisfy their elementary needs in

    order for them to learn to build themselves, to situate in report to the others, to have their

    first social experiences without danger.

    Ensuring a normal family structure which responds best to the needs of the child and

    good functionality are indispensable for the establishment of a childs universe so that they

    would never be in the position of facing human problems (divorce, re-marriage, adoption)

    which overcome their power of understanding.

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    The parents represent, indisputably, the strongest and most important educators as they

    influence the child from a very early stage. A child belonging to the human species can not

    survive without help, at least on the course of the first four or five years, when their

    fundamental needs must be satisfied: love, language, obedience, game, creation of an

    image of the world, the feeling of belonging to a family, using power, movement, proper

    feeding, needs which can not be fulfilled otherwise than in a commune space not only

    physical space where they meet and communicate. The helpless being will turn into a

    self- conscious, intelligent person and integrated in the type of culture where born.

    Still, the process is not realized in a passive way, in the sense that the child would only

    absorb the influences they get into contact with, as they are active beings whose exigencies

    or needs affect the behaviour of the ones responsible with their nursing and especiallybecause there is this daily routine of their interaction. Both the parents and child change

    their behaviour towards each other through continuous reciprocal stimulation and the

    unique manner of the childs participation is a crucial factor also for the parents behaviour.

    Nevertheless, the child couldnt be educated without being raised under the influences of

    the adults.

    Social initiation starts within the enlarged family frame and implies a psycho-social processof transmitting-receiving specific behaviour models of this group, process essentially even

    more as the child, as potential human personality, does not possess articulated language,

    has no knowledge, attitudes, targets or life ideals whatsoever. The contact with others is

    important in our life, interaction being essential during the first years of life in order for the

    biological, mental and social development to be able to run its normal course.

    The interaction of the child with the others is strongly dependent on the cohesion and

    adaptability of the family, so that their psycho-social development depends on the

    interaction type and behaviour of each of the members.

    The specificity of the roles which characterize family results from a relational logic of the

    roles, built inside the family experience. The maternal and paternal identities are not

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    predetermined, but they are built in the history of the couple itself, the conjugal and

    parental report play the role of revelator of the latent identity of each of the members.

    The parenting role is one of the many roles fulfilled by the adult, but unlike the others, this

    has unique traits: while the human relationships take place under the sign of change, the

    first relationships between the parents and the child have the particularity to be one way

    only, as the child can not offer anything, they can only receive. The parents, accustomed

    until the childs birth with a certain lifestyle must, all of a sudden, take upon themselves a

    new responsibility, change their behaviour and adapt themselves to the needs of a new

    human being.

    To offer attention, support and protection to life represents a crucial condition for the future

    social interactions, for the reciprocal communication and development of the socialcustoms, and expert studies can only confirm the fact that the parents are the most

    important persons in the life of their child. The lack of experience makes the child an

    incapable and unknowing being, dependent on the adult, who thus has the moral obligation

    to protect and guide, especially because the parent position is synonym with the cognitive

    and interactional competence, with the certainty that, for exchange, the childhood is

    equivalent with the absence of knowledge and abilities.

    The roles practiced by the parents are negotiated with each ones personal identity, but one

    must underline the fact that being a parent doesnt mean a certain main feminine or

    secondary masculine role, as the maternal and paternal role are specific and

    complementary. The differences between roles is represented by the manner and nature of

    the involvement and not by the lower or higher involvement level, which cannot be

    measured as these qualitatively different behaviours cannot be compared from a

    quantitative point of view. The differences reveal, in essence, two visions on the world, two

    moral lessons: the father ensures the material security, and even if he is more unavailable,

    this is not equivalent with lack of involvement, as he is working alone, for the others and

    the mother works for the others, along with them, resulting in a greater availability of the

    mother, an open and thoughtful attitude at any time with the childrens problems.

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    The role of the mother is essential in the mental development of the child and the

    relationship between the mother and the child has been transformed in the key of

    understanding the humanisation and socialization process of the child. The mother becomes

    the instrument which marks their destiny: the entire intellectual and emotional

    development, their success and integration, everything being based on the precocious

    relationship with the mother, considered an irreplaceable and indispensable presence. The

    development of the child and its adaptation is favoured by a series of maternal factors:

    behavioural, attitudinal and of personality, their influence being associated with the social

    environment in which the child is integrated. The mothers behaviour is favourable when

    she is proactive when the child encounters difficulties, when she expresses few anxiety

    feelings and positive strengths. The attitude of the mother stimulates development andadaptation when she manifests tolerance and confidence in the possibilities of the child and

    respects the childs presence. The personality factors, represented by a great emotional

    stability, good control of emotive states, perseverance and maternal energy are responsible

    directly for the variation in the mental development of the child.

    The greatest importance is represented by the affective dimension of the mother-child

    relationship, as the affective relationship is essential in the greatest part of the childsdevelopment, and in its absence, they could not have a relationship life, which is

    indispensible to the individuals of the human species.

    The normal structure of the family itself, but especially the relationships with the mother,

    responds better than anything else to the childs affective needs. The research made by

    Anna Freud outlined the differences between the child raised in the family and the child

    raised in the orphanage: the child within the family finds the territory appropriate to the

    growth of their personality, as within this natural environment they receive the maximum

    affective stimulant, whereas the children privileged of the maternal love are in

    disadvantage regarding the physical, intellectual, moral and social development.

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    The family is an affective environment by excellence, a school of feelings, environment

    which models the personality in its dynamism and allows the child to develop as a balanced

    individual, with rich affectivity and well adapted to the challenges of life. According to the

    same author, the parents attitudes often have another unexpected consequence: it seems

    that the social acceptance of the individual could be compared to the family acceptance he

    received.

    The health and mental balance depend mostly on the way the mother chooses to fulfil her

    role towards the child, as the lack of love represents the only thing that the young being

    cannot overpass. The tenderness of the mother must be a shelter which the child must know

    for sure he will always find and on which to rely on under any circumstances. In the

    relationship with the mother the child will find the elements of his dynamism, which isneeded his affective evolution, elements represented by the love impulses which the child

    will match in order to switch step by step from the pure selfish entrapped phase,

    specific to the new born, to a phase of altruism and social participation.

    Abraham Maslow introduced the notion of individuals request which must be satisfied, if

    one follows a normal development pattern and one of the superior levels is represented by

    the need for affection of the human being. Essentially for affectivity is the role of thematernal model, synonymous to ulterior development. The mother-child duplex is

    inseparable especially during the first life period: both participants need the presence of

    each other and this bond can exemplify one of the most stable human connections. The first

    social relationships of the child are related to their mother, with whom they form a social

    couple and ones behaviour is decisively conditioned by the others. The attachment

    manifested towards the mother offers security as the child also invests emotional energy

    into the relationship, and at the same time, learns how to appreciate, under the form of

    feelings, what he receives from the person who takes care of him with love and carefulness.

    Still, the attachment can only appear towards the person with whom they actively interact

    and who answers positively to their needs for attachment.

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    Affective evolution is marked by the relationships with the parents and especially with the

    mother as they have an effect on the structure of the infantile psychic because in childhood

    the conditions of the psycho-affective symbiosis with the mother start to manifest. The

    attachment towards the mother is a powerful constant, bearing great importance for the

    other plans of the infantile psychic. A mother who estranges her child, who treats him cold,

    not showing them love, generates negative effects which puts a stop to the adaptive

    behaviours development. Any relationship with the exterior world takes place first through

    the mother, whose nursing through the first years of life has prolonged moral

    consequences. The child perceives, first of all, the behavioural and affective resonances, of

    significance being the positive affective relationships of acceptance and warmth with the

    parents, or, on the contrary, the rejection attitude which is manifested through hostility and

    brutal authority.

    The family is the most indicated to develop human contacts, especially though the mother,

    the most relevant impersonation of the neighbour, from which the child learns to recognise

    and feel the others close, developing feelings of social communion, without which no

    human being could entirely evolve. Erick Erickson underlines the fact that the maternal

    relationship type is more important than the food quantity offered to the child, this

    relationship being considered as a prototype of the later relationships. The mother isconsidered a source which generates primary rewards, the contact with whom can lead to

    the satisfaction of some needs, or not, depending on the feelings developed: pleasure,

    affection of conflict. These reactions of appreciation or avoidance learned from their

    relationships with the mother are extended in the relationships with the others, governed at

    the same time by feelings of trust or distrust, which originate in these precise relationships

    with the environment, especially with the mother. By fulfilling the childs needs, she

    contributes to the installation of trust and a state of affection, while a sporadic and

    accidental nursing certainly leads to the appearance of lack of trust and hostility.

    During the social and personality development of the child, the father bears a privileged

    role, as he transfers the love and security offered to the mother also to the child. The father

    means most of all love and safety for the mother, and by this, indirectly for the child.

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    The positive precocious and long term relationship with the mother appears to be important

    due to the presence of the child near the baby, but the mother is not the only value carrier.

    Although the father establishes with the mother what we might call the family policy, the

    values of this policy, tradition and socio-economic circumstances make out of him the

    agent through which the family connects to the wider material and social environment. The

    paternal authority is coloured by its own nuance, as more fundamentally than the mother,

    the father is engaged in the confrontation with a reality which is exterior and inexorable.

    The father introduces a differentiating element because he practices his function of

    representing the external order, thus leading to the first individualization traits of the child,

    guiding him beyond the universe formed by the maternal sphere. The specification of the

    paternity consists in the opening to the outer world, the father representing the intermediarybetween the world and the child.

    The parental roles present themselves under three aspects: the aspect of direct adjustment

    of the childs behaviour, to encourage and supervise them; the aspect of communication

    exchange of information and dialogue under the aspect of cooperation, of participating to

    common activities. The role of the father is thus presented as having an instrumental role,

    the resources he is offering being cooperation, consistency and information, whichcompletes each other, with the expressive resources of protection and understanding of the

    mother.

    The role of the father in the family is not related to his masculinity or his life style in which

    he succeeds in overcoming the emotional states, but to the way in which he leads and

    manages the family life, to his capacity of taking decisions and the consequences of these

    decisions, the way in which he ensures emotional support to the mother and the children.

    The father cannot truly love the child if he is not involved in all their development stages,

    starting with the birth. The father must be the friend and teacher of the child, social and

    ethic behaviour role model, with a protective role.

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    The father brings an essential contribution to the aspects which concern child protection

    and consolidation of the protection feeling in their conscience; he extends the possibilities

    of elaborating and experimenting his socio-affective behaviours and attitudes, balances his

    mental potential which can find its entire efficiency within an integrating vision of the

    society, feminine and masculine. The principle of the symmetry appears in this case, and

    not only, as form of existence of intra-family relationships, but also as a projection in the

    childs conscience of an exterior bipolar reality.

    The figure of the father is fixed in the childs conscience later than the mothers, and, as

    time goes by, the two presences tend to balance more and more. The connections which

    bond the child with his father are formed later than the ones he establishes with the mother,

    but it is certain that starting with the age of two, the feeling that the child carries for thefather integrates into the affective life of the child and represents an element necessary in

    the ensemble of forces that contributes to the evolution of the childs character and

    personality.

    Regarding the direct role of the father, P.Osterrieth supposes that the presence of the father

    is for the child a mirror of the mother, presence which comes to extend the rewards and

    satisfactions range offered by the mother. The contacts with the father have a differentcharacter the thesis of a weak paternal involvement was confirmed in the sense that the

    fathers interfere twice as little in adjusting the behaviour, but the child thus knows a

    different way to learn and adapt, without having his safety feelings affected. As the child

    becomes aware of the fathers presence, they assign specific traits to them, they give them

    more importance and the father becomes, as Freud asserted, a necessary ingredient of the

    complex forces which contributes to the formation of their character.

    The father represents in the family, the principle of authority, which is deemed as factor of

    the family co-existence, as education factor - the father, symbol of strength and power,

    becomes an identification and imitation pattern for the child. His absence from home,

    conditioned by the necessity of ensuring financial income for everybody, turns the

    decisions he makes into incontestable facts. His presence awakens in the child resistance,

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    opposition and self affirmation forces, authority leading to a large number of unavoidable

    frustrations, with good effect, equivalent to the desire to resemble him and take his place.

    This authority must not generate fear neither in the eyes of the little girl, who must love

    him, nor in the eyes of the boy, who must identify with him, acquiring the characteristics of

    the paternal presence.

    In the absence of the parental model, when the mother is not involved in the control and

    cooperation accepted by the children, the boys become uncertain and they manifest

    antisocial behaviours such as higher aggression and delinquent tendencies. For the girls, the

    absence of the father could create difficulties in establishing relationships with the opposite

    sex, neuroticism and discomfort in relationships with peers.

    The paternal typology elaborated by R. Vincent (1972) identifies five types of father:

    The dominant father, who pretends obedience and respect from the child and

    mother, whom he sees as weak helpless beings, who must be protected and

    leaded. The child reacts with timidity and inhibition to this type of behaviour.

    The tyrant father, characterized by aberrant authority crisis which actually

    hides weakness. The child devalues this paternal type which will no longer be a

    model and later, becoming aware of its real mediocrity, will manifest profoundimbalances.

    The friend father tries to form in the child feelings of esteem, using a collegial

    behaviour, but which is disadvantaged by the fact that it does not have precise

    limits, thus creating damaging confusions to the child.

    the quitting father: the type of father who is forever absent, occupied and who,

    actually, hides behind these reasons as he does not feel capable of controlling

    his child, forcing his wife to replace him, thus damaging the mental coordinates

    of the child. The lack of this control will favour the appearance of stubborn

    attitudes as the child will develop the habit not to comply with the moral, social

    and scholar imperatives.

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    With his extremely sharp sensitivity, the child perceives, denounces and rejects a series of

    situations such as: the too great a distance between them and the father (insensitive,

    unavailable father), too small a distance (friend father), impersonal father, morally or

    materially dependent of the mother. A child who does not see in their father a model to

    follow can not receive from him the necessary affection which he deserves.

    What is common to both the mother and father in their affection for the child and essential

    to their security in front of the unpredicted circumstances of life is the availability of the

    parents to always be receptive, interested and the capacity to be the guides of the child.

    Within a family in which there is an atmosphere of reciprocal esteem, where the mother is

    centred on the childs needs, attentive with their manifestations and their emotional and

    physical wealth, and the father gives an identification model, the child will have a peacefulgeneral behaviour, not being marked by relational and psychological problems.

    I.3. Educational types of the parents and their effects on the development of the child

    The concept of educational attitude is defined by G. Allport as a state of mind built in

    experience which exerts a dynamic influence on the individual, preparing him to react in a

    particular way to a certain number of objects and situations.

    The educational type aims at the nature and the characteristics of the family relationships in

    which the educational process evolves. The transmission of values, attitudes and

    knowledge is made by using different styles, adapted to objectives and are organized

    around two axes: authority axe/ liberalism or constraining/ permittivity and love/hostility or

    attachment/rejection.

    The relationships between parents and children constitute the nucleus of socialization, as

    within the family models for all fundamental relationships are built. The child is in direct

    psychological bond with their family, in the sense that their personality in development

    enters a relationship with the entire range of functions, traits, moods and psychological

    experiences of the parents. This way, the representation the child will later have on family

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    depends on the educational style practiced in the family, as either a refuge of the

    individuality - a welcoming environment of affection and understanding, in which there is

    an exchange of ideas, or as a tradition tower in which the only preoccupation of the parents

    is to model the child by their face and resemblance.

    The educational style offers optimum conditions for the cognitive and affective

    development of the child, very important being the fact that the young being evaluates the

    family climate in terms of understanding and parental support.

    Not all families are oriented towards the same values and educational attitudes, the

    diversity resulting from the educational/training level, the residence environment and

    socio-professional affiliation. Numerous authors observe the fact that parents belonging toa different socio-economic category pass on to their children different values, in the sense

    that some value autonomy and self-control, imagination and creativity and others the order,

    obedience, respect for the elders, exterior rules and the capacity to solve problems.

    The educational style is dependent on several variables, among which there is the internal

    structure of the family: families poorly structured present less rules to the child, the norms

    being almost absent, families with rigid structure which have the tendency to adopt aneducational style based in parental control and submission of the child, facing him with

    rules applicable without exception and families with supple structure, which supply flexible

    norms, leaving the child the possibility to manifest his initiative and express himself freely.

    The correspondence of the educational influences with hereditary potential existing in

    childhood is very favourable to global development, especially if the education is done

    accordingly the parents should keep in mind the present but also future possibilities of the

    child. The educational tasks suppose, from both parents, a conscientious and continuous

    action, but oriented towards the specific of the childs personality, so much more as the

    child influences his parents at the same time. The development and normal growth of the

    child depend on these educational styles of the family, and, while they fulfil a series of

    conditions, there is a harmonious and balanced development. Thus, M. Voinea considers

    that parents should:

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    - be aware of the necessity of the education they exert upon the child;

    - have clearly outlined in their minds the finality of the educational actions

    - have the capacity to run these activities, to make time and to dispose of adequate

    means to realize them;

    - to agree upon the actions as their cohesion sets the basic for the educational

    ethics; the parents should agree first upon some requests or sanctions and then impose them

    unitarily, as the child will undermine the request of one parent, relying on the support of

    the other.

    The pattern should ensure rich, varied and interesting influences, to support the child in

    activities with formative role, to stimulate them, to give them tasks which should favour

    their participation and power of understanding, and especially, to communicate a lot with

    them. An insufficient training in activities with formative potential leads to a limiteddevelopment as the poor demand becomes important part of the hereditary potential loss

    never to be recovered. The opposite effect, overburdening, appears from the normal desire

    of the parents who want for their child an evolution as close as possible to the aspirations

    they never reached, thus overloading them with the content and intensity of the activities.

    Parents with too good intentions overburden them with their expectations related to career

    and prestige so that the child will do until puberty all that is requested and expected from

    them, by fear of not disappointing their parents.Besides the spectacular temporary results, you can obtain only psychosomatic disorders

    later on, as the premature fatigue sets in and these children will become indifferent towards

    the society, they will avoid human contacts and will manifest antisocial behaviours. The

    incorrect education leads to neurotic disorders, and during scholar age, to intolerance,

    depression and an extremely hard adaptation to the ulterior life conditions in general.

    The parents must know that everything they offer to the child for assimilation is accessible

    to the child only in relation to the mental level of development reached, so that their every

    new acquisition is obtained in certain moments of their development, and the most

    important thing, they must know the fact that their mental development is made in a

    progressive way, with an exact coincidence between the evolution level and the age of the

    child. Every moment of the childhood is a moment of addition, which is done on a daily

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    basis and which is not improvised by every individual, but it is itself the reason of being of

    the childhood, which aspires to the realization of the adult as an example of its species and

    the environmental stimulations are indispensable for these changes to manifest.

    The parents act as a data base for the child, thing which will help them acquire and later on

    elaborate action methods, but this information data base must include mechanisms which

    take into account the needs and possibilities of the child and, under no circumstances, to

    use mechanisms similar to dressage. Building as self-conscience being is taking place,

    initially, through the primary identification with the parents, signifying that the child copies

    the general behaviour styles, which turn out as the moral conscience at the end of the

    socialization process. The moral conscience is associated with the relational experiences

    from the most fragile age and is formed through the integration by the child of thesanctions, judgements and values which come from the parents and which act as models of

    acceptable behaviour: they decide which of these behaviours will be forbidden and which

    will be allowed. The childs evaluation of the family climate in terms of understanding and

    parental support is frequent for children of young age, while the feeling of being

    understood and supported decreases during the adolescence.

    The indicators which reflect the parents permissiveness and restrictiveness are representedby:

    Parental control, as an indicator which reflects the constraints imposed to

    the child and the strictness with which rules are applied and controlled

    The parental support which represents the engagement level of the parents

    in the childs life, the help and time they give to them and the receptivity to

    their emotional states and needs.

    Depending on these indicators, the research outlined three obvious parental action models:

    - the permissive model, characterized by low level of control, associated to the

    identification of the parent with the emotional states of the child and with the strive to

    answer their needs. They are imposed with few norms and responsibilities, so that the way

    in which the child responds to the parental expectations are submitted to poor control.

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    -the authoritarian model is associated with a high level of control with poor support

    for the childs activity. The parents systematically transmit values such as authority,

    tradition, order and discipline, imposing unbreakable behavioural principles and rules to

    the child.

    -the authorized model combines systematic control with a high level of parental

    support. The parents form rules and control them so as to be complied with, but they do not

    impose them, being open to verbal exchanges with the children, explaining them the

    reasons for which the rule must be respected, thus stimulating their thinking autonomy.

    Starting from the observation that some parents act upon the environmental life of the child

    and other upon their personality, Kellerhals and Montadon (1991) elaborated four influence

    techniques used by the parents:

    Of control the parents form a series of interdictions and obligations, practice a

    system of sanctions in order to obtain the desired behaviour

    Relational - based on the belief of the parents that the childs manifestations

    are only answers to the behaviour of the persons with whom they interact; thus,

    the action is made on the relational context (with family members, with other

    children)

    Of motivation they aim at making the child conscientious of the relationshipbetween the costs and benefits of an action and to give up/ accept another action

    Of moralization consists in stimulating or inhibiting a behaviour of the child

    by using values already assimilated

    The research Kellerhals and Montadon made, led to differentiating these influence

    techniques from the educational principles represented by:

    Affective protection warm and protective family environment, absence of

    conflicts

    Love tenderness, manifestation of the affection and understanding

    Valorisation trust in the child, appreciation for their accomplishments,

    underlining their particularities in relation to others

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    Normative stability constancy in the family rhythms, the existence of life

    discipline and norms.

    The family education is guided by values which point to the flourishing of the childs

    personality and their social success, but for this, the parents dont elaborate educational

    strategies by certain logic and dont opt firmly in favour of one principle or another. Every

    parent keeps in mind a combination of the two, wishing for the plenary accomplishment of

    their potential which can lead them further to integration and social success. This way, the

    child must be assisted in all their actions while being allowed the liberty of speech,

    encouraging them, valorising them and stimulating their self-confidence on a permanent

    basis.

    The importance of relationships inside a family resides in the fact that they are the source

    of building and crystallizing the personality traits that the child will form by interiorizing

    these inter-human relationships. The personality of the child will thus be the result of the

    relational context. An organized family environment, positively valued, with educational

    influences, will form a balanced personality. A vitiated environment from a relational,

    immoral point of view will form a personality with unstable traits, with difficulties in

    adjusting and tendencies to confusion. The formative value of the relationship between theparents and the children resides precisely from this direct and vital connection between

    them, from the fact that only the parents are the most sensibly interested by their needs,

    weaknesses and the entire development potential of the child, especially now, when the

    human being has the maximum plasticity, favourable to the personality development.

    Many times, the relationships between parents and children manifest themselves in an

    exaggerated manner due, in the first place, to parents who forget to carefully dose the

    affectivity as specific trait of family education. Thus, if on an intellectual plan they can be

    normally developed, the deficiencies can be felt on an affective and moral plan, as a result

    of practicing a style detrimental to the harmonious development of the child. This is the

    reason why it is indicated that the two extremes be avoided: exaggerated love and

    estrangement, which lead to lack of self-confidence and non-communication.

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    Carmen Ciofu synthesizes the mistakes parents can commit in their effort to offer optimum

    conditions of development, but unconsciously forcing them to pay for their love:

    Excessive authoritarianism of parents who ignore the possibility that the child must

    assimilate moral and ethic principles necessary to live in the society. The education of the

    child implies the capacity of the parents to analyze their unreasonable behaviour and

    attitudes and not impose them without prior judgement. The child must understand and

    learn the rules of an adequate behaviour, not under the threat of the punishment, but in this

    case the relationship parent-child does not have the character of a dialogue. This attitude

    of the parent teaches them nothing but an unacceptable social behaviour and the child will

    not learn how to control themselves and to not answer aggressively to frustration.

    Authoritarianism which appears from an excessive physical and social

    contact between the mother and child, at the age when their relative independence should

    have been installed. The mother of these children is restrictive and, from a sense of

    possession, limits the tendencies of the child to become autonomous. The long term

    effects of this type of dominance over the child are represented, first, by lack of autonomy,

    anxiety and other infantile behaviours.

    The indulgence, characterized by inadequate control of the childs activities,

    acceptance, obedience without judgement to the requests of the child. This attitude favoursthe development of aggression with two types of major manifestation: anger crisis

    (behaviour disorders as a result of the conflict between the childs personality in full

    affirmation and the permissive attitude of the parents) and the opposition/negativism

    (unjustified attitude of refuse, resistance and hostility towards any type of offers) and

    influences the later school performances.

    The parents aggression, which main cause was established by

    psychological and social studies as being represented by the personal disastrous

    experience during their own childhood.

    The following subscribe to these wrong methods to love: the parents perfectionism which

    underline all the childs faults and discourage them, and anxiousness, major flaw of the

    parents, which make the child unstable, disobedient, actually imitating their parents. None

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    of these form any defence form nor contribute to their life experience and the affectivity

    and activity, being independent will be perturbed.

    An affective climate which does not offer any security faced with the environment, still

    unknown and unusual for the children, will later generate physical, affective, intellectual

    and social traumas, will lead to difficulties in the manifestation of trust in others and in the

    establishment of good relationships with the others. If the parents dont dose closely and

    affective, the relation between them and the children will be hard to integrate in the

    collective and even in their own families and in the future they wont be able to have this

    relationship life so indispensable to man. The inter-relationships between the mother-

    father, mother-father-child form the base of activity for their whole life, and together with

    the constant attitudes, their frequency and quality contribute to the crystallization offeelings, event caused by long term relationships and generalising the emotions.

    CHAPTER II

    Kindergarten a socializing factor

    II.1. The teacher and the group of elderly - factors of socialization

    Starting kindergarten is an important social event for the preschooler child and the process

    of adjusting to the new situation is not very easy. The child, who sets foot on the steps of

    the kindergarten for the first time, leaving the familiar universe of home behind, lives an

    unexpected adventure: at home they were the only representative of their generation, in an

    environment formed of characters of different importance and dimensions, but

    characterized by the fact that they were all irreplaceable. Compared to their place, well

    established by the parents, through a more or less sudden transition, they now find

    themselves in a new environment, from which they dont know what to expect and how toanswer. The first phenomenon produced is a tensioned mood generated by the childs effort

    to stock an excessive quantity of new information, among persons they now first see. The

    adjustment, including group adjustment, is realized as accommodation and assimilation of

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    what is important in the groups characteristics, of the requests it imposes and the

    acceptance it offers.

    Kindergarten is a group frame larger than family, which implies, on one hand, an

    unpredictable quantity and, on the other hand, imposes more severe requests from the

    childs behaviour: a more diversified and complex schedule which involves new

    adjustment demands, due to the subtle discomfort created. Moreover, they now encounter a

    more restricted type of affection than within the family, politeness rules, a greater request

    to personally control self- hygiene and way of eating, so that all these involve adaptation

    efforts. What they used to think of as the absolute truth is shaking faced with all these

    unfamiliar things, and they find themselves alone, with no armour, in a world which

    enjoys no favourable prejudice.

    The following behavioural plans represent the adjustment to the entire ensemble of requests

    aimed at the child: service plan, mandatory activities plan and society integration plan.A

    good adjustment, characterized by curiosity and active investigation and quick

    relationships with those with whom they will interact further on in this environment, is

    dependent now on the previous socialization in the family. Besides some exceptional cases

    the children adapt well: once the temporary separation of the mother is accepted,kindergarten seems to offer a safety feeling, a world in which, step by step, they will

    become more free and powerful. The child entering the new institutionalized environment

    of the kindergarten, where they meet strangers, generates various affective reactions: some

    adapt fast, others with more difficulty or not at all.

    Ursula chiopu identifies six types of adjustment of the child to the ensemble of requests

    aimed at them:

    Very good adjustment (maximum adjustment level) which is characterised by

    separating without hesitation from the person who accompanied them, by

    manifesting active curiosity and relaxed behaviour and by quickly establishing

    relationships with the other children and teacher.

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    Good adjustment: the child separates without hesitation, quickly establishes

    relationships with the teacher, but slower and in a more selective with the children

    (attitudes of expectation are met more frequently than active investigation)

    Intermittent tensioned adjustment: characterized by anxiety, alternant mood,

    insecurity and also curiosity towards the environment and a tacit detainment of the

    person accompanying them

    Continuous tensioned adjustment characterized by: anxiety, verbal insistence,

    establishment of some very reduces relationships with the teacher and the other

    children, evident abandonment behaviour

    Difficult adjustment: the childs refusal to separate from the person who

    accompanies them, quasi-total refuse of establishing verbal relationships

    (inhibition), blockage of the curiosity and investigation, tensioned and reserved

    mood

    Radical attitude of maladjustment with an active, sometimes violent refuse of the

    child to separate from the person who accompanies them, negativism, and

    repugnant and even aggressive behaviour sometimes.

    The adjustment process is relatively difficult and complex, with particularities which

    express the age, temper and previous experience, but the adjustment to the kindergartenenvironment offers a great socialization potential to the child. Most of the children pass this

    difficult obstacle especially if the teacher understands the small drama which takes place

    and also if the parents know how to ease this obstacle which the child is going through,

    giving up an attitude that is too possessive with them, therefore creating the best

    adjustment conditions.

    The role of the teacher is essential, as the teacher is the main intermediary between the

    preschooler and the new world: the educator is privileged by the childs full attention and,

    this way, he enters the first degree socialization area. Moreover, many interesting

    phenomena of active transfer and affective identification are produced, meaning that the

    preschoolers transfer all their love and attention towards the educator, which they also

    identify with, as an effort to substitute the mother. A great part of the childs life will run

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    its course in the kindergarten and the further development of the child depends on the

    harmony between the two educational environments represented by the parents and the

    teacher

    Magdalena Dumitrana synthesises the competences which the one who continues the

    activity of modelling the preschoolers personality must have:

    the educational body must be first of all a person who likes children. Certainly, not

    only in declarations or sentimental effusions towards the children when the parents are

    present, but they must like them daily not the ideal children, but children as they are, with

    their way of acting and understand things. The educator bears an important role in the ethic

    development of the child and they must not judge in terms of good child bad child, but

    coordinate their efforts with the parents to fight against bad attitudes, if they exist.

    The didactic body must be an adult model both for the child (which, instinctively

    searches for a model to imitate), and also for their parents. The children watch the adults,

    observe them and listen to what they say. Although the family continues to have the most

    powerful influence on the child, during kindergarten parents must accept the fact that other

    adults also become important to them and this does not mean that the childs love for them

    is diminished. The child expanded their socializing area, understood and accepted the

    existence of other rules than the ones of the family and tries to adjust to them. It would be amistake for the parents, by feeling their authority gapped, to insist in imposing their

    opinion against the teachers request not to, as they would only decrease her authority in

    front of the child, thus creating confusion and tension. Both parents and the teacher

    represent models for the child and these models shouldnt be conflictive.

    the didactic body must have a profound theoretical and practical knowledge of the

    child and childhood, using this science to promote the healthy development of the child, to

    guide their effort towards their own growing up, to create a favourable environment to

    supporting these efforts.

    another quality of the teacher is the positive attitude towards the family: she must

    always see the child in the family context, to know the situation of the family and its

    influence on the child. This does not signify any intrusion in the family life or critics

    brought to one of the members of the childs family, but her support, expressed through

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    words and actions, for their needs and their overcoming various obstacles which can occur

    due to the physic and mental changes inherent to a normal development.

    The practical consequences of these qualities, which, theoretically, any educator must stand

    between two extremes: the severe or the kind teacher.

    The severe teacher starts form the following motto: The children must listen, as they

    are children. And indeed she obtains obedience: the children are still, but their

    personality doesnt manifest. In exchange, the teachers personality fully manifests,

    and the children are spectators, but they are not attentive, as the teacher inspires fear,

    and fear is by its nature unattractive.

    The kind teacher starts from the following motto: Leave them alone, theyre just

    children, so she leaves the children to behave as they want. As the children grow and

    their personality is more and more outlined, the weak authority of the educator will

    decrease until it becomes insignificant. The children do as they want, while the

    disobedience and lack of self-control, now character traits, will push them towards

    bigger and bigger mistakes.

    The middle way between the two extremes is the best solution: neither the severity

    which suffocates the personality nor the weakness will allow the child to grow

    harmoniously.

    Besides the role of the didactic frame in secondary socialization, the researches so far have

    outlined the intensification of the preschooler childs tendency to contact other children of

    their age and the importance of the peer group, who, at a certain level, becomes

    indispensable to the children for their social beginning. Studying a large number of

    preschoolers led t. Nstsescu-Cruceru to the conclusion that the frequency of friendship

    contacts increases during this period, which results in the spontaneous manifestation of the

    social integration tendencies. According to the same author, at this age there are three types

    of interpersonal relationships: strictly personal (based on affinity or antipathy), work

    relationships and appreciative interpersonal relationships.

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    The installation and consequence of such connections between children represent the most

    meaningful aspect from the point of view of pre-education, as these connections leave their

    fingerprints on the childs success of social integration. Based on this, the preschooler

    education must ensure all ways of facilitating the integration of the children in peer groups,

    and develop their favourable conditions for building a relationship network with the other

    children. Only within a group children are offered the opportunity to compare themselves,

    evaluate their capacities and limits, to form their self-image more objectively, important

    premises in their ulterior integration in new groups and in society in general.

    Limited to the family circle during the first three years of life, the childs world enlarges

    step by step, including the characteristics of the new community in which they live. The

    relationships formed during preschooler period, with human beings who do not belong totheir family circle, influence the process of outlining the image and self-conscience: the

    positive appreciation of others leads to enriching the self. Some authors consider the

    primary sense of the self as being mostly formed of attitudes, words and gestures of others,

    which the child perceives and imitates and to which he answers: the sense of the self is a

    product of the behaviour of others towards them. Because children do not fully hold the

    sense of their ego and, especially because fantasy and reality merge and fiction dominates

    the game life, they are influenced by every suggestion, meaning that the nature of therelationships with the others must correspond to their needs.

    The self-image is still unclearly outlined, gradually forming through a self-other interaction

    process, as a result out of which the children get to know what is expected from them. At

    the beginning of the preschooler period, a clear tendency of over-appreciation can be

    observed in the absence of reference cases of comparison, the children project themselves

    as implicit etalon, making a self-centred appreciation which leads to the expansion of their

    self-image. In time, kindergarten offers the social space for comparison through the group

    of equals and the common activities, thus reaching knowledge of self and the others,

    decreasing the self-appreciation. The integration in this group completes the self-image and

    the way they refer to the people surrounding them.

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    The group of equals is considered a secondary form of socialization as it offers the child

    the possibility to manifest spontaneously and naturally: the children interact with the

    others, giving birth to friendship feelings and some special emotional connections,

    establishing social contacts more than with the adults. From this moment on, the children

    separate slowly from the family, getting out of its protective shell in order to perform their

    novitiate of life in society, by building their own reality.

    Together with this group, the preschooler forms a small society, a climate, in which

    attitudes and emotional experiences form, with very strong affective connections, sufficient

    for realizing the affective balance of the child. Within this group, the affiliation and esteem

    necessities are satisfied and the behavioural and affective growth develops. Research

    showed that affective immaturity later leads to frustration and affective conflicts whichgenerate confusion.

    Being connected to the children of the same age, the entire system of relationships with the

    others is modifying. The role of these interactions is very big in regards with a new socio-

    emotional climate, favourable to the development of some activities and, more importantly,

    is reflected upon the childrens personality, leading either to some positive character traits

    or to isolation. Although the relational dynamic, on which friendship and collegiality isbased, is supported by an apparently paradoxical motivation, meaning that every child want

    only their own affirmation and this generates individualist attitudes and not socialization

    explanation consists in the necessity which the preschooler feels towards the partners with

    whom to compare and confront. Children are in the same positions in a group of equals, as

    no child dominates, normally, in any aspect. Now everything happens on the principle you

    get what you deserve, which offers the children the opportunity to learn how to interact

    with the others in a cooperative context.

    The children must initiate also in other social relationships than the ones they establish

    with their models (...); they must also know equal-to-equal relationships

    The group is organized from the childrens initiative, without the adults influence, with

    partners being elected by accepting or rejecting them, based on criteria which have as

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    central element popularity or unpopularity gained in front of the others through their

    personal traits. The lack of these positive appreciations and popularity strongly affects

    self-appreciation and self-evaluation.

    Collective group life ensures the child individualization through socialization, meaning

    their own affirmation in the competition with others like them. A transfer of habits,

    feelings, beliefs which represent the quintessence of the collective experience of each and

    every one is made by interiorising the child-child attitudes, double, mobile and reversible

    behaviours: to give/ to receive, to help/ to be helped.

    II.2 Kindergarten Social Skills Activities

    After the age of three, the preschooler institution offers the child situations for

    learning and cooperating and possibilities of expressing the autonomy. Adapting to life in

    the community is not happening by itself, but through activities through which the children

    have to refer to one another as all the progressive activities of the children are mediated

    through the relationship with one another. The educational objectives aim, substantially, at

    the social development of the child, their adjustment and socialization. The pedagogy

    specific to this age can only be based on what interests the child, what startle their curiosityand encourage their enthusiasm.

    The main education method is game, as natural activity in perfect coherence with the

    famous definition of childhood stated by E. Claparede: childhood is for playing.

    E. Bonchis states that the game can be defined as a volunteer activity with no other purpose

    than itself, characterised by four different aspects:

    The attitudes and motivations of the child: the child naturally plays for the pleasure

    of playing. He manifests an intrinsic motivation which means they play the game as

    the activity is pleasant and offers strengthening by itself, and not by obtaining a

    certain thing. No adult can command a child to play as this activity depends only on

    the children.

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    The child is more interested, in general, in making things rather than in producing

    something, thus differentiate work from playtime: work can consists in the same

    activities as the game, but it doesnt aim at pleasure necessarily, but at the results

    that can be obtained from the activity.

    The game resembles the daily activities and theyre different from them as they are

    not mandatorily related to reality. The child can, for example, play fighting, but

    by smiling or laughing, they seem to communicate that this behaviour is not what it

    seems

    Many researchers, with different psychological approaches, were preoccupied with the role

    and importance of this activity in the childs development, thus elaborating several

    explanatory theories:

    Psycho-analytical theory Sigmund Freud and Erik Erikson, as representatives of

    this orientation, outlined the social and emotional importance of the game, which

    allows the child to confront with problematic situations, but at the same time to

    control them. The purposes of the game would be a better knowledge of the world

    through a more adequate control of the problems and fears. The context created by

    the game offers the child increased power over the environment, the possibility to

    explore and try small experiments which they cannot make in reality. Moreover,the game also offers the possibility to satisfy the desires which cannot be fulfilled in

    reality, through fantasy, also as an opportunity for catharsis feelings expressed

    freely during the game as they cannot expres