THE ESSENCE OF REMEMBRANCE - Florida State Universitymyweb.fsu.edu/ess07/pdf/Stegall_Essence.pdf · "THE ESSENCE OF REMEMBRANCE" FADE IN: INT. UNSEEN - DAY MEDIUM SHOT Showing an

"THE ESSENCE OF REMEMBRANCE"

FADE IN:

INT. UNSEEN - DAY

MEDIUM SHOT

Showing an exquisite, black casket housed within a sheer-curtained alcove, about

two feet above level floor. Its inhabitant: JUSTIN BLAKE, a handsome young man of

twenty-five.

NARRATOR (V.O.)

Consider, if you will, one Justin Blake, a willing participant in a lonely

exercise of mind over matter. An exercise of which the only aim is to lay

one’s self peacefully down in this solitary bed of the finite.

The CAMERA spins and we see our NARRATOR’s

hand—forming a mudra Mudras are a non-verbal

mode of communication and self-expression,

consisting of hand gestures and finger-postures.

They are symbolic sign based finger patterns taking

the place, but retaining the efficacy of the spoken

word, and are used to evoke in the mind ideas

symbolizing divine powers or the deities themselves.

The composition of a mudra is based on certain

movements of the fingers; in other words, they

constitute a highly stylized form of gestureal

communication. It is an external expression of 'inner

resolve', suggesting that such non-verbal

communications are more powerful than the spoken word http://www.exoticindiaart.com/mudras.htm

—in shadowy darkness. He holds a burning stem of incense, positioned in a hand-carved wooden sculpture of Shiva.

NARRATOR

For Justin Blake, here in self-induced repose was

terrified of his past and obsessed with the beyond. And thus, taking

poetic liberties with an archaic maxim, spoke these final words: "Those of

you who have forgotten my past are destined to relive it--with a slight

revision."

CLOSE-UP on the sculpture including the Narrator's hand. We follow as he moves it OUT OF FRAME and INTO NEW FRAME, where his hand DISSOLVES and becomes a NEW CLOSE-UP of a woman’s' hand, now holding the sculpture.

WIDER SHOT

Revealing GISSELLE BLAKE admiring the piece of art. She is 30 and quite beautiful, a model.

GISSELLE This is interesting. Mmm, nice smell. It gives the room a ••• mysterious aura.

(CONTINUED)

CONTINUED:

TWO SHOT which now includes her brother NICK, slightly older. An unattractive, pompous man whose face and

actions are (con-) Con is a Latin preposition meaning "together with". It may refer to:

Confidence trick, also known as con, scam, or flim flam Con (TV series), secrets of the con artist revealed

-stantly betraying an outward show of bravado@[Latin contr , against; see kom in Indo-European roots.]

NICK

Mysterious, Gisselle? Hardly.

This ••• place reeks of a teenager’s pot party.

Loo~\, ~ around you. ~~~4W-> ~~-~y

FULL INT. SHOT – DAY

This is a spacious, high-ceilinged, personal library voluminous with books in

Sanskrit, and connected to what must be a stately mansion. Awash with the

colors of the wooden floor, walls and bookshelves, the room is however

subdued by a smoky haze created by literally dozens of stems of burning

incense.

Only slightly less obvious is a representation of what has to be every piece

of Hindu and Indian artifacts ever produced. Everywhere are scattered great

and small idols, rattan items, and pictures associated with India: Gandhi,

Vishnu, Krishna, Maharajas, the Taj Mahal, the Ganges River, a framed map of

Ind±a. Furnishings include elegant, leather, wing-backed arm chairs, a closed

cabinet, and a monstrous wooden desk behind which there is no accompanying

chair but a raised platform about waist high.

And above all, the open-faced casket, upstaging and seeing all.

NICK (always

sarcastic)

I feel like I’m in Gandhi’s personal museum.

GISSELLE

I kind of like it. It’s peaceful. •••

NICK

More so for some of us than others.

Gisselle winces at his loathsome allusion.

NICK

(continued)

Why do I get the feeling that at any

moment now a bunch of bald people wearing

sheets and banging tambourines are going

to burst in and begin pandering me for my

loose change?

(CONTINUED)

-------------------------------------------------------------' CONTINUED: The air falls inevitably still. SEN. BLAKE fades a few steps away and without regarding the others, withdraws a whiskey flask from the breast pocket of his fine suit, downing the contents. He shows mild disgust with the now empty bottle. NICK makes his way toward the huge desk, waving his hands before himself as though he were swimming through fog. He eyes the elevated PLATFORM which sports a single red cushion.

NICK What's that supposed to be? A throne?

GISSELLE

Obviously, that's where the Swami will sit.

Like the rising sun, wearing orange/saffron robes, he must dispense light to every nook

and cranny of the world. Wherever the evening catches him is his home whether

under someone's roof or under God's own sky. Free and ever moving like the breeze he

gives life-breath to all. Ever-flowing like a river, he quenches, cleanses and irrigates

all. Like a fire he purifies all. Like a light he illuminates all. Like the sky, he remains

untouched, clear, calm, giving his space to everyone; he invites every being to find rest,

solace, succor and consolation within his field of being that emanates from him.

By Pandit Usharbudh Arya

(Now Swami Veda Bharati)

In taking the vows of swamihood one declares "a-bhyam" to all living beings: I am a threat

to none, a danger to none; may no living being henceforth fear me. In a great fire-offering

he names each and all his organs, sense-faculties, pranas Prana ( , IAST: prāṇa) is the

Sanskrit for "breath" (from the root prā "to fill", cognate to Latin plenus "full"). It is one of the five organs of vitality or sensation, viz. prana "breath", vac "speech", caksus "sight", shrotra "hearing", and manas "thought" (nose, mouth, eyes, ears and mind; ChUp. 2.7.1)., mental states and functions,

and as he pours a libation of ghee (clarified butter) into the fire, as though offering his own

faculties to the universal fire, he declares regarding each of them, "No more mine"; "free of

all dust I had gathered heretofore, I am now sinless; I am light.

MRS. BLAKE Swami?

GISSELLE

Justin's Guru. Don't you remember?

NICK (singing) Swami, how I love ya'how I love ya', my dear ol’ Swami…

NICK taps his forehead mockingly. He lifts a very old book from the desk and begins thumbing through it. CLOSE-UP on the book, which is written in Sanskrit and looks as if on parchment.

GISSELLE Nicky, be careful with that. It's very old.

Purposely he allows it to fall. It crumbles.

NICK Tsk! Couldn't read it anyway. It was in Hindu.

SEN. BLAKE

(with authority) Sanskrit, actually. Or early Hindi. You may have destroyed something over a thousand years old.

MRS. BLAKE pats his hand.

MRS. BLAKE Marvelous, darling.

NICK (ne'r impressed) Oh. Thank you, Senator. Challenging, NICK snatches up one of the many mounted stems of incense which bears an emblem written in Sanskrit.

NICK Well, Sir scholar. Care to translate what this says? We're all DYING to know. As if speaking directly to it, Nick’s EYES fall upon the CASKET. CLOSE-UP on a matching bronze marker on the casket, reading: "JUSTIN BLAKE 1984 – 2009. Also a single word in Sanskrit. SWAMI (O.S.)

It says - Remember. Om 2 also Aum ( m) [Sanskrit om, aum.]

n. Hinduism & Buddhism The supreme and most sacred syllable, consisting in Sanskrit of the three sounds (a), (u), and (m), representing various fundamental triads and believed to be the spoken essence of the universe. It is uttered as a mantra and in affirmations and blessings.

FOUR SHOTS All heads reel to – THE SWAMI a man of eighty or more, draped in linen robes dulled in color only by his chest-length beard. His EYES cut through the smoke like beacons of fire. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yHgkOs9ZFvM http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BcpNNssOet0&feature=related http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_x9F1KPRr1I&feature=related

…a chicken being just an egg's way of making more eggs.

Not to be confused with Selfish DNA.

The Selfish Gene

Original cover from the painting The Expectant

Valley by zoologist Desmond Morris

Author Richard Dawkins

Subject(s) Evolutionary biology

Publisher Oxford University Press

Publication date 1976

Pages 224

ISBN ISBN 019857519X

Followed by The Extended Phenotype

The Selfish Gene is a book on evolution by Richard Dawkins, published in 1976. It builds upon

the principal theory of George C. Williams's first book Adaptation and Natural Selection.

Dawkins coined the term selfish gene as a way of expressing the gene-centred view of evolution,

which holds that evolution is best viewed as acting on genes and that selection at the level of

organisms or populations almost never overrides selection based on genes. An organism is

expected to evolve to maximize its inclusive fitness—the number of copies of its genes passed

on globally (rather than by a particular individual). As a result, populations will tend towards an

evolutionarily stable strategy. The book also coins the term meme for a unit of human cultural

evolution analogous to the gene, suggesting that such "selfish" replication may also model

human culture, in a different sense. Memetics has become the subject of many studies since the

publication of the book.

ACT II SAME INT. - SAME TIME The BLAKES are predictably caught off guard, none more so

than Nick. um also umm ( m, m)

interj. Used to express doubt or uncertainty or to fill a pause when hesitating in speaking. NICK Jesus Chri -- SWAMI No my friend; but thank you. I

1. am Swami Rajmayananda. Results for: rajmayananda

Your search - rajmayananda - did not match any documents.

NICK Well how the hell - how

long have you been there? for the benefit of the many, bahu-jana-hitaya for the comfort of the many, baha-jana-sukhaya

SWAMI Forgive me, I move silently so as not to disturb the wind. Nick is momentarily put off by what should have sounded like an absurd remark - had it come from virtually anyone else. Smiling, GISSELLE comes forward. GISSELLE I'm not so sure I appreciated your entrance either, but I am so pleased to finally meet you. HE bows humbly. SWAMI You are Gisselle. Justin spoke most kindly of you. NICK Ah, the infamous mystic of the east arrives. You were the last to see Justin alive. SWAMI Nick. NICK is again put off. The Swami spoke his name as if he has always known him. NICK That's right. SWAMI Justin spoke most - often of you as well •• (CONTINUED) CONTINUED:

NICK (laughing nervously) Yes, I'm sure he did. The SWAMI'S EYES catch the weight of Mrs. BLAKE'S stare. She has been trying to "figure out" this man, somehow, like the rest, sensing she does in fact "know" him. GISSELLE Mother, this is the Swami Rajmayananda. The spiritual leader with whom Justin lived the past two years. He bows to her as well. HRS. BLAKE My, you are a dramatic •••

person. Such a moment is a moment of dying; dying to one's erstwhile limited self. The

renunciate performs that ceremony to himself which is normally performed by relatives

following the funeral of someone physically dead. H. H. Swami Rama tells the story of a

man in a certain city in India. Every astrologer in the city predicted that he would die on a

certain morning. The evening before the predicted date for this man's death Shri Swamiji arrived in the city and the man went to see him. This dialogue followed:

He: Swamiji, every astrologer in the city predicts that I am to die tomorrow. Swamiji: Do you want to live on? He: Indeed, I do. Swamiji: Then renounce the worldly life and become a swami tomorrow morning; die

to your previous world. He: Oh, but what will my wife say? Swamiji: What will she say if you died in the morning?

The gentleman went home, got his wife's permission, became a swami, and lived on.

NICK (jumping back in) Never at a lack of words, eh, Mother? Moving right along, may I present the patriarch of this distinguished clan: Senator Nicholas Blake Sr. Instinctively, SEN. BLAKE presents his hand. The SWAMI simply bows. Perturbed, the Senator lets his hand fall.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

font: “Symbol”)

Step1 Center your mind and focus on the person, thing or concept to which you will bow. Try to make a mental list of why you are grateful and use this energy to give out with your bow. The Hindu tradition states that that which you give will come back, so bow with love, with honor, with respect and with thanks. Step2 Place your palms together with your fingertips together and placing up towards your heart. Your hands should rest naturally at your center, the tops of your thumbs aligned with the bottom of your chest plate. Remember that your left hand represents your consciousness, or siva, and draws energy to you. Your right hand represents shakti, or the energy of nature, and is how you send energy out. Step3

Lower your eyes and then bend forward at the hips, keeping your back tall and straight as you lean forward. The forward action of the bow in the Hindu tradition represents the energy of your conscious being bowing in appreciation for the divine, which resides in the heart of every living being. Step4 Say the word, "namaste," pronounced "naa-ma-stay," when you reach the lowest part of the bow. This word when vocalized, which means "I bow to you," helps to send your loving energy out to be received by the person or object you are honoring. Lift back to standing, lift your eyes and release your hands.

NICK Gotcha. SEN. BLAKE You'll have to excuse me, but, exactly why are you here?

GISSELLE Daddy, you know why he's here.

SEN. BLAKE

(curtly to her) I'm quite certain he can speak for himself• SWAMI Most assuredly I can. You might say that is how I make my living. (CONTINUED) CONTINUED: NICK YOU might. {wt- SWAMI Did you might receive a letter? Yes ••• .r:: c\.; ~\ ~SEN.~ BLAKE(V',?p.~ - (He produces it) ••• it says that we are all to assemble here in this - funeral parlor, for the viewing. And then there is something in Hindu. NICK Sanskrit. THEIR EYES meet for an instant. SWAMI Hindi. The problem of a diasystem. Sometimes I forget what language I am thinking in. SEN. BLAKE Well that's quite understandable. I'm accustomed to dealing with foreign languages - if you know what I mean - on the Senate floor. No one laughs. SEN. BLAKE Never mind. What does it say? Seats are taken.

SWAMI In due time. Please, Do sit. SEN. BLAKE Very well. Oh! Would there by any chance be a bar in here? MRS. BLAKE (timidly) Darling ••• SEN. BLAKE Don't start! I'll be damned if I'm going to sit through my son's funeral dry. NICK You'd be damned if you sat through anything dry. SWAMI In that cabinet. He indicates a fine piece of wood and marble cabinetry which happens to be near the alcove where the casket is situated. SWAMI It is very well equipped. NICK I'll have a scotch. We HEAR the cabinet opened with a SLAM. NICK jumps slightly, knowing his answer. NICK That's quite all right. I'll have a smoke instead. Nick produces a gold cigarette case and simple box matches. NICK Does anyone mind if I smoke, or would you prefer I just breathe the air? Poising a cigarette in his mouth, Nick strikes a match, but holds it. SEN. BLAKE (slightly surprised) Huh! MRS. BLAKE What is it? - SEN.BLAKE My favorite scotch. What a nice coincidence.

MRS BLAKE Really? NICK Ooooh. As if it were waiting for you? NICK reacts with pain as the match burns him, having forgotten it. NICK(con't) Shit! Hiding his embarrassment, Nick strikes another match - holds it tauntingly - as if daring it to burn him again. NICK You know, it's funny; I just remembered something. Justin never liked the smell of smoke, and yet this room is dense of it. GISSELLE Justin never liked the smell of cigarette smoke. NICK Oh, yes. That's right. g(otehse ~o~ut t.e y,-,}:Jf);D The match goes out again. ANGLE ON NICK'S FACE More and more disturbed by what he sees. NICK'S POV The SWAMI'S EYES, staring - penetrating. REVERSE POV - SWAMI Nick's face crumbles; his eyes flutter. NICK Didn’t anyone ever tell you that it’s not polite to stare. SWAMI (laughing lightly) Oh, yes. Many times. SEN. BLAKE, content with drink in hand, finds his place. SEN. BLAKE All right, let's proceed. What the hell happened to my son.

GISSELLE Don't make it sound like it was his fault! (CONTINUED) ~ .------.- CONTINUED: SEN. BLAKE Well I wasn't there. GISSELLE Typical.

Who are the

Floating Heads?

Salamanzar and Grand Poobah Wine Swami

Durham, NC, United States

SEN. BLAKE And what's that supposed to mean? GISSELLE Nothing. Throughout the above, the Swami has taken his place behind the desk on the platform. Sitting with his legs crossed, he looks almost as if he were floating. NICK again strikes a match, having grown more and more agitated. THE SWAMI parts his lips and breathes an imperceptible wind. NICK'S match blows out, of course. NICK (very agitated) What the hell - (he looks about) Is there a draft in here? GISSELLE Got a problem Nicky? NICK No. No problem. I just ( with a start) WTFfuat are you staring at? THE SWAHI sits, watching placidly. SWAMI Forgive me, but I was momentarily entranced by your inability to light your cigarette. NICK Well become entranced by something else! Go into a coma for all I care - just quit staring at me like you're trying to steal my soul.

SWAMI Oh, no. That could never happen. (CONTINUED) CONTINUED: GISSELLE Nick, are you entirely incapable of being polite? NICK As a matter of fact - aah, a solution. NICK finds a lit stem of incense and with great determination, lights his cigarette with it. NlIiCgKhtsfinhdiss caiglairtetstteem wiotfh inicte.ncHeG a~~d(-uwpi.)~·~h greiavt'-.,,-~\~-dn.cLeOnvttradt:i.'\on, .JW ."iP I Idbr GISSELLE The Swami has traveled half way around the world to present Justin's will and -- MRS. BLAKE -- How do you know that? That wasn't in our letter. Darling, was that in our letter ?••• (not finding her husband in sight) ••• darling? As if drawn, HER eyes fall upon the CASKET. She moves to it. ANGLE ON THE ROOM as seen from the alcove; the casket f.g., Mrs. Blake b.g. approaching. She sadly steps within the raised area as if in a dream, her face a study in remorse.

Why?

Why? Why?

an interferon drug. The drug’s prescribing information warns that this could happen. So when Dr. Marks per formed functional MRI scans on the

brains of these suicidal patients while they looked at the creepy photos, they all showed "activation" in specific brain regions that might be

associated with suicidal thoughts.

Might there be a self-destruct button embedded in our CPU, one that could be identified and disarmed in at-risk individuals? Jobes, for one,

thinks suicide will never be reduced to something so simple. "After all, we know the brain chemistry of depression, but most depressed people

don’t take their own lives," he says.

On stage in the other room, a mother is recalling one of her five children, the brightest of her brood. He could have done anything in life, she

says, but in high school, with no warning, he shot himself in the head. Suicide is murder for your loved ones. Much of her adult life has been an

attempt to find meaning in a devastating loss. THOMAS JOINER, PH.D, a professor

of psychology at Florida State University, is also dealing with that kind of loss. I’d studied his research and prepared my questions on my way to Tallahassee to meet with him, but it’s only when we sit down across from each other, alone in a huge, impersonal

conference room, that it

occurs to me: I need to ask this 43-year-old father of two sons about his own father’s death-by suicide.

"I’m comfortable talking about it," says Joiner, who also lost his maternal grandfather to suicide. "It’s important to discuss, as a way of

learning more about an important public-health problem."

As a kid growing up in Atlanta, Joiner knew his father felt down once in a while. But he suspected no thing more. Even later on, when he

studied suicide as a graduate student at the University of Texas at Austin, he didn’t make the connection. The day his dad died, his mother called

to say he’d disappeared. The police wouldn’t find the body until2Y2 days later. The cause

of death: a self-inflicted knife wound.

"My response was extreme shock," says Joiner. "Just a deep, agonizing sort of loss and sadness-what most people feel in such sudden-death

scenarios." The final page of his father’s life would remain blank; there was no note. Only in hindsight does Joiner suspect that his father had a

variation of bipolar disorder.

The hidden nature of suicidal thoughts makes me wonder if perhaps a lot of men entertain these urges. "I take your point," says Joiner.

"There is this other layer: Why did it happen? How much anguish and pain must he have been enduring? That was there for me, and it remains

there for me to this day."

The vague threat, the unvoiced desire for death, is not unusual in men who will eventually kill themselves. They may make an offhand crack

or casual remark. "They’ll hint that something’s wrong and then take it back," says suicide expert Lisa Firestone, Ph.D., the

SUICIDE HOTLINES

• 1-800-273- TALK (8255) The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline will connect you confidentially to a counselor at a suicide crisis center 24/7. (Veterans: Dial 1.)

• 211 This FCC dialing code provides links to mental health hotlines.

• 911 If someone is currently attempting to kill himself, call.

WEB SITES

• suicidology.org The American Association of Suicidology (AAS) serves as a clearing house for suicide info.

• afsp.org The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention focuses on research and education.

• glendon.org Offers a variety of suicide prevention resources.

• psychalive.org Provides self-help tools for those who may be feeling suicidal, or who know someone who’s feeling that way.

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EVERY

MAN IS CAPABLE OF REACHING A DESPERATE

PLACE WHERE SUICIDE CAN MOVE ONTO HIS RADAR SCREEN. coauthor of Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice.

Even doctors don’t know what to do half the time.

Kaplan randomly chose primary-care doctors in Illinois from the files of the American Medical Association and sent them a survey, asking how

they managed depress ion and suicidal tendencies in their patients. Roughly 50 percent of the doctors said they wouldn’t ask those patients

if they had access to a gun at home.

Mental health professionals often don’t have all the training they need to help at-risk patients, either. As part of his master’s degree program in

psychology, Jason Spiegelman served an internship as a therapist at the San Fernando Valley Community Mental Health Center, in California.

"Learning the theory and actually practicing it are two very different things," he says.

Sitting in a Baltimore restaurant, Spiegelman describes a Monday morning that began for him like any other-until he arrived at work. As he

walked in, he says, the secretary glanced up. "One of your clients commit ted suicide over the weekend," she said, as if announcing the arrival of

a FedEx package. A feeling of nausea flooded the young therapist’s bOdy as he climbed the stairwell to his boss’s office. "I’ll never forget it," he

says. "The fear. The self-loathing. Am I going to lose

my internship? And then, a second later: How can I be thinking of myself?"

Spiegelman instantly knew who was gone. Juan (not his real name), a Latino man in his 30s, had been in therapy for years. The man’s case

file spilled over with notes outlining years’ worth of mental doodling about suicide-what the experts call ideation. III':

For all of his formal education, Spiegelman hasn’t taken a single class on suicide. That’s the norm, not an exception.

"Most clinicians learn on the fly rather than in school or professional training programs," says Jobes. "It’s the most common

clinical emergency, and yet clinicians are not typically well trained to deal with it."

Spiegelman had done everything he’d been trained to do with such clients, including taking a suicide assessment: He’d

asked Juan a series of questions designed to gauge the immediacy of the threat. The more specific the suicidal thoughts are,

the greater the chances they’ll be acted upon, the theory goes.

"As often as we did the assessment, he never went beyond a vague fantasy of suicide," says Spiegelman, 35, who today

works as an assistant professor of psychology at the Community College of Baltimore County, Maryland. Juan’s father

would later say his son’s mood brightened in the days before he died. When Juan did commit suicide, he hanged himself-an

approach he had never mentioned.

Spiegelman doesn’t blame himself.

His supervisor’s review noted that

he hadn’t missed anything. EJ445463 - The Operation Was a Success, but the Patient Died: Theoretical Orthodoxy versus Empirical Validation.

http://www.eric.ed.gov/ERICWebPortal/custom/portlets/recordDetails/detailmini.jsp?_nfpb=true&_&ERICExtSearch_SearchValue_0=EJ445463&ERICExtS

earch_SearchType_0=no&accno=EJ445463 Mostly, though, he credits Juan’s father with keeping the tragic event from destroying the life of a second man. "He was as

gracious as you could imagine," says Spiegelman. "He said it wasn’t my fault, that his son spoke highly of me. The father took care of me, which

was a nice thing, because it doesn’t always go down that way."

UICIDAL MEN tend to share certain characteristics: They feel trapped in their lives. They’re commonly substance abuse rs.

Depression, bipolar disorder, and SChizophrenia are highly correlated with suicide risk. But there are still miserable men with no

desire to check out early, thank you, and others who seem well

adjusted but who flirt in their minds with suicide. Psycho tropic drugs that dampen depression don’t always douse a death wish. (For more

information on prescription drugs and suicide risk, see "A Deadly Side Effect.")

"I think every man is capable of reaching a desper-

ate place where suicide can move onto his psychological radar screen," says Jobes. "But who goes there, when, how, and why is this unique

interplay of biochemistry, social forces, family modeling, and other factors. How those queue up is remarkably complex and specific to the man

who’s struggling at that moment."

I’d always thought of suicide as a tragedy primarily affecting two groups of men: adolescents, for whom upheavals that would seem

manageable soon enough instead become matters of life and self-inflicted death; and the aged, who might feel miserably alone or who

simply can’t stand the thought of another day of nursing a hurt that’s been aching all their lives.

There’s a reason for that misperception. "Several years ago, colleagues of mine organized a National Institute of Mental Health conference on

suicide and middle-aged men, and there was sort of a ho-hum reaction," says Jobes. "Like, who cares about those guys? Most suicide

prevention focuses on subgroups, whereas few seem to notice the 800-pound gorilla."

"Men in the overall U.S. population just haven’t been the focus of a lot of suicide-prevention efforts," adds Kerry L. Knox, Ph.D., director of

the Canandaigua Center of Excellence for Suicide Prevention of the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs.

That’s mind boggling, since 70 percent of all suicides by men occur in life’s prime, not its dawning or twilight.

Suicide rates are comparatively low under age 16, rise gradually through age 18, and then jump through age 24; the normal four-to-one male-to-

female ratio of suicide deaths rises to seven to one between the ages of 20 and 24. But rather than tumbling after age 24, the rate actually levels

off at the high point.

One cause of the spike is that mental disorders often tighten their grip in a man’s early 20s. "[Patients with] bipolar

disorder and schizophrenia have a higher risk of suicide during the first 5 years of the disorder rather than later on, when people often have

learned to accept it and deal with it," says Firestone. These individuals are usually prescribed drug regimens, which can help

if they remember to swallow all of their pills. But that’s a tacit admission of mental illness, one that’s often resisted. In rare cases, taking mood-

altering drugs can make a bad situation worse.

Even if a man reaches his 20s in good shape, psycho logically speaking, suicide land mines-like the ones mentioned below-remain scattered

along the journey throughout his 30s and 40s.

RELATIONSHIPS Joiner estimates that "roman-

tic disruptions" and other relationship issues trigger depressive episodes in about 75 percent of men between the ages of 20 and 40 who commit

suicide. "Especially

in their early 20s, guys can think, This one person was right for me, I’ve lost her, and it’s all over," Firestone says. "They lack the

perspective that they’re going to have other relationships, maybe even better relation ships, in the future."

CAREER FAILURE Data going back decades shows that, like clockwork, economic downturns push more men over the brink-a fact that

should concern us

all now. Men draw much of their identity from their careers, and when unemployment rises, that underpinning falls away. Many men at that

highly vulnerable age for suicide-the early 20s-may struggle simply to begin a fulfilling career in a sharp economic downturn.

The feeling of being a burden doesn’t apply only to people failing at life. Even the most successful, driven men, the ones we perceive as

being on top of their game, can buckle under a heavy load. Which might explain why Tennessee Titans quarterback Vince Young was

reported to have mentioned suicide to a therapist earlier this season. "With so many people

BACK FROM TH E BRI N K Leading suicide expert

Lisa Firestone, Ph.D., director of research and education at the Glendon

Association, details suicide’s progression, and how to halt it.

_1- -1.1.1.

I

1 "Even very isolated She doesn’t Frequent

people have some really care excuses to

Wanting contact with family about me. avoid social-

to be alone or friends. which She’ll just izing. chronic

most or all can be used to reject me. lateness,

of the time persuade them to I’ll just bring unexplained

seek treatment," everybody absences

says Thomas Joiner, down once from social

Ph.D .. a professor they see how events, low

of psychology miserable I self-esteem.

at Florida State lam.

University.

2 "A male friend Who’s the Decreased

Won’t tell you he’s use? My work or

Losing sad, but he will tell work doesn’t academic

interest in you if he’s lost matter performance,

school, interest in his hob- anymore. giving up

bies," says John Why bother hobbies

work, or Draper, Ph.D., direc- even trying? or other

hobbies tor of the National Nothing previously

Suicide Prevention matters enjoyed

Lifeline. "Disrup- anyway. activities.

tions in those areas

are real signs."

3 "Tearing oneself I’m incom- I Statements of

Directing apart creates the petent, stu- helplessness,

psychological pain pid. I’m ugly, extreme

hatred and desperation disgusting. psychological

toward that drive the I’m a fool, pain,

himself suicidal person," a creep, a I desperation,

says Firestone. reject. I don’t increased

"Suicide becomes deserve irritability

a way to escape anything; I’m I and anger.

the pain and worthless.

aggravation."

4 "I’ve had patients See how bad Moodiness,

insist in front of I make every- lack of com-

Feeling like their wives, No, no, one around munication,

a burden to You’ll be better off me feel? lethargy,

family and without me,” says They’d be exhaustion,

David A. Jobes, better off hopelessness.

friends Ph.D., a professor without me.

of psychology at the I’ll just stay

Catholic University away and

of America. "Family stop bothering

members don’t them.

feel that way."

I I I - .....•........ - Iii

5 "As simple as it

I;d better I Reading or 1.1. il

Talking sounds, talking plan it. It’s writing about •. ; •.

about wanting to the only thing death, •

about die by suicide is a I can do. I reminiscing • _ . _ •.•.

suicidal very clear and have to buy about a dead •••

thoughts dangerous warning a gun and person,

sign," say Joiner. then find a saying things

Unfortunately, that deserted like, "I might

sign is often missed back road, as well be

or ignored. maybe. dead."

6 "People can become I can’t even Preparing

so despondent, and do this! I’ve a note, a will,

Initiating yet they hide inten- Thought or both;

his own tions," says Eric about this giving away

demise Caine, M.D., codirec- long enough. prized

tor of the Center for Look, I’m possessions.

the Study of Pre- miserable

vention of Suicide every minute.

at the University of Just end it.

Rochester. "They It’s the only

might tell a doctor way out!

They’re fine."

7 "In his own mind, This is the An unex-

he may finally be solution pected, even

Sudden, at peace with his to all my jarring

dramatic decision-not the problems. brightening

mood decision to seek I have mode of his dispo-

change- help, but the one my decision. sition, espe- to end it all," says I am in con- ciallyone

for the Firestone. trol now. All that doesn’t better

this pain will feel natural

soon be over. to you.

Jnci; at I ,

)ma

I

,

A DEADLY SIDE EFFECT According to prescribing info, these drugs are potentially linked with suicidal thoughts. (If you’re on a drug

and feeling down, consult with your doctor before discontinuing it.) 1\

• Neurontin Last July, an FDA panel announced that this and 10 other antiepilepsy drugs double suicide risk. • Antidepressants Prozac, Paxil, and Zoloft sometimes work like magic. But the FDA concluded in May 2007 that everyone ages 18 to 24 on an anti

depressant is at a small but increased risk of developing a drug induced urge to die.

• Accutane Pimples may be the least of your problems if you take this acne med: The FDA has linked it to dozens of suicides:

• Interferon No wonder some patients who take this drug for hepatitis Band C or cancer want to hurt themselves. The side effects are a cocktail for suicidal behavior.

I!

! II,!

• Amantadine This drug, used to treat Parkinson’s syndrome and influenza infections, has a list of side effects that include depression

and suicidal thinking.

• Amphetamines This class of drugs

includes Ritalin and Adderall, used to treat attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder, but could exacerbate preexisting depression or bipolar disorder.

• Reglan If heartburn weren’t bad enough, this acid reflux drug has been reported to trigger a death wish in some users.

• Chantix Last February, the FDA reported that this stop smoking pill gave a small number of users "vivid, unusual, or strange dreams"-and thoughts of ending it all.

;

1,1 identifying with and riding on his success, the bur-

den of failure can loom large," says John Draper, Ph.D., director of the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline pro gram. The higher the stakes, the more there is to lose.

SHAME AND HUMILIATION It’s one thing to fall from grace; it’s another to have that fall subjected to public display and ridicule. That

prospect was a major contributor to "executive suicides" such as those com mitted by Clinton lawyer and confidant Vince Foster, and Enron vice

chairman Cliff Baxter. Fame isn’t a pre requisite, either; going public can mean having your own family and social circle learn embarrassing

news. "There’s this very male lineage of suicide being a face saving way of resolving dire circumstances," says Jobes.

MODERN WARFARE Historically, suicide rates among soldiers have dropped "in theater" during times of actual combat, but that trend has been

turned on its head in Iraq and Afghanistan: The number of suicide attempts in the U.S. Army has increased sixfold since the war on terror began. Nearly

600 soldiers in that military branch alone-the size of an infantry battalion task force-have died by suicide. The Army itself estimates that up to 11,600 times during that span, an Army soldier has attempted to harm or kill himself.

That doesn’t bode well for returning veterans, who are at heightened risk for suicide once they leave the structure of military life. When Mark

Kaplan and colleagues used national health surveys to track 320,890 men for 12 years, they learned that the veterans in that group were no more

likely than the others to die from natural causes or by accident-but twice as likely to die by their own hand. Recent reports suggest 1,000 suicide

attempts per month among V.A. vets, a total that the V.A. spokesperson I interviewed wouldn’t dispute. SELF-PRESERVATION is our most basic instinct, so suicidal people must be mentally ill, right? Not necessarily. Joiner believes men learn

fearlessness every time they play a contact sport, fight in a bar, or experience pain or injury. This eases the brakes that stop us from doing

something contrary to our nature. Sometimes, that includes killing ourselves.

To test his theory, Joiner asked student-subjects to fill out self-reporting questionnaires on how much pain they could withstand. Male subjects

scored higher, and it wasn’t just frat-house bravado. When participants were then asked to place their forearms in water barely above freezing or have their

fingers pinched by a mechanical device, men lasted longer than women did.

At the suicide conference I attended, researchers presented the results of an experiment that tested Joiner’s theory on recent veterans of the Iraq

war. Never is "learned fearlessness" so prevalent as it is during the violence of combat, and the participants did report becoming more tolerant of

mayhem and danger. "When I was overseas, I kind of lost connection with reality ... and my feelings," said one subject. "If you don’t have any

emotions, you aren’t scared or afraid, either." If Joiner is right, many of these vets will be at high risk of harming themselves, perhaps fatally, as

civilians.

Learned fearlessness is particularly dangerous when

it’s combined with the feeling of being a burden to others. "Those pieces-isolation, fearlessness, and feeling like a burden-simultaneously lead

to suicidal behavior," says Joiner. "You think, “my death will be worth more than my life to people I love."

From study reviews, suicide experts find that isolation usually emerges as the biggest risk factor of all. Jobes has seen this dynamic unfold

among soldiers. But when men do reach out, they can regain their foot ing quickly. "Once you pull them out of that internal world, they respond

well to a two-heads-are-better than-one approach to problem-solving in therapy," says Jobes. "But it’s a conundrum because they’re not seeking

treatment."

FOR A MAN who tried to kill himself, John Kevin Hines is pretty lucky. On his descent from the Golden Gate Bridge, he threw his

head back during free fall, which allowed him to hit the water in a seated position albeit at 75 mph. He opened his eyes as he

plunged 50 feet, and as it became darker, he thought, I didn’t die. What am I going to do now? A man who moments ago tried to kill himself was desperately fighting for his life now. He broke through the surface just before passing

out.

At the moment he jumped, a woman who had a Coast Guard friend on speed dial just happened to be driving over the bridge-which is the

only reason two Coast Guard members fished Hines out of the water .

"Do you know what you just did?" one of them asked. "Yeah, I just jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge." "Why?"

"I don’t know," said Hines. "I guess I wanted to die." "Do you know how many people we pull out of this

water who are dead already?"

Of course, the best way to prevent suicide is to keep men like Hines off those bridges in the first place. In 1996, John Draper founded a crisis

hotline for the Mental Health Association of New York City. Three years after gaining national attention for its work surrounding 9/11, the

organization won a grant to run the national network of suicide hotlines. Every month, the network’s 133 independently operated call centers

receive more than 40,000 calls. A recent study in the journal Suicide and Life-Threatening Behavior found that when people call a hotline they

experience a decrease in hopelessness and psychological pain (but no reduction in intent to die). The effect lasts for weeks afterward. Twelve per

cent of callers said the hotline kept them alive.

"Sometimes when a man’s mind is locked in to suicide, there’s a paradoxical openness, too," says Draper. "If you’re open to killing yourself,

might you be open to less absurd notions as well? They just have to stay alive long enough to find other options."

Another sobering truth is that a prior attempt makes you more likely to eventually kill yourself. But Draper turns that upside down. "Past

attempts carry a life time risk estimated at about 7 percent," he says. "That means 93 percent of those who attempted suicide found ways to

survive periods when they were convinced life wasn’t worth living and to go on to live out their lives. What might they have missed otherwise?" •

NICK (exhaling haughtily) Dearest sister, need I remind you of your own highly visible imperfections of character or shall I acquire the testaments of your last six or seven lovers to attest to the fact? GISSELLE At least I am able to attract my own lovers. NICK For however short a period. GISSELLE (with great hidden implication) Perhaps even, for a single afternoon. (CONTINUED) CONTINUED: NICK What? SWAMI He wanted to learn the ways of Sanātana Dharma. GISSELLE And did he? SWAMI It was difficult. You see, in Hinduism, everything is divine. In Western thought, a single God is revered, although considered a trinity of spirits. In Hinduism, virtually thousands of deities are worshipped. NICK Pick a god, any god. GISSELLE So how do you know which one to uh, worship? SWAMI In all actuality, it doesn't matter. All forms of existence are united in Brahman. As the Vedas - the most important Hindu scriptures state: "Truth is one; the wise call it by various names" (transliterated from Sanskrit: Ekam Sat Viprah Bahuda Vadanti.)

NICK Sort of like the force in Star Wars? SWAMI If you must find a more contemporary example. •••• The SWAMI steps from the platform and considers the map of India ••

.~ (CONTINUED) 'I am a threat to none, a danger to none; may no living being henceforth fear

me.'

The word swami means master; it means striving for the mastery over one's smaller self

and habit patterns, so that the eternal Self within may come shining through. The act of

becoming a swami is not so much an acting of becoming, of adding on, of allegiance, as it is

an act of setting aside, of renunciation. A swami is a monk, one who has set aside all of the

limited, worldly pursuits, so as to devote full time effort to the direct experience of the

highest spiritual realization, and to the service of others along those lines. Renunciation is

not anti-world, in any sense of the world being a bad place. Rather, it is a matter of

priorities about how one will spend his or her time, the twenty-four hours in a day, and the

seven days in a week. Traditionally renunciation is the fourth of four stages of life, although

one who feels the call might renounce and become a swami at any stage of life.

The true samnyasi (renunciate or ascetic) does not identify with any form of division or

multiplicity. The Sanskrit word samnyasi comes from samnyasyati, meaning he renounces.

Sam means together, ni means down, and asyati means he throws. He or she throws down

any personal identity whatsoever, including not only those related to physical objects, but

also to nationality, religion, work or family identities. If there is the external appearance of

any identities such as these, it is only in the perception of, and for the benefit of others

whom the samnyasi may serve. Even the name used by the samnyasi or swami is primarily

for the convenience of others.

----------------------------------------------------------..: CONTINUED: NICK (hissing, pinpricked) Damn you. GISSELLE Swami Rajmayananda, please forgive us -- NICK -- Beg your own forgiveness. GISSELLE -- but we are all stunned by Justin's death and unaccustomed to being gathered together. It has been such a long time •••

Her VOICE becomes SOTO VOCE as we follow the SWAMI'S EYES to the ALCOVE. GISSELLE (S.V.) ••• well I'm sure Justin mentioned that our family is not very ••• uh, close and ••• MRS. BLAKE (softly, to Justin) Oh, my beautiful, beautiful boy ••• GISSELLE ••• we haven't seen him for nearly three years ••• •••

why MRS. BLAKE (crying) how could you leave me… did you do this? ••• ••• GISSELLE ••• and when we heard he had committed suicide, well naturally we were all shocked ••• ir.r\ NEW ANGLE – suddenly, the casket begins to vibrate, then actually shake. ~ MRS. Blake backs away nervously. A figure begins to rise from what appears to be within the casket. SHE screams. (CONTINUED) : The others react with natural shock. GISSELLE Mother, what is it? Having hidden behind the casket, SEN. BLAKE stands, laughing. MRS. BLAKE (gasping) Nicholas, must you? SEN. BLAKE Sorry, couldn't resist. You know, Kerry darling, sometimes I think you loved Justin more than you do me. GISSELLE Perhaps her taste has developed. Obviously, yours hasn't! SEN. BLAKE Oh, come now Gisselle, a little prank never hurt anyone.

GISSELLE (painfully) I wouldn't be too sure of that. ANGLE ON - the casket and JUSTIN. ANOTHER ANGLE ON – THE SWAMI, maintaining his patience Hold, then CUT TO: SAME INT. – LATER MRS. BLAKE What exactly is a - Swami? SEN. BLAKE (intervening) A Swami is like a Pope - the highest member of a holy order. A Guru is basically a spiritual instructor. A Guru who has earned the title of Swami is, no doubt, endowed with the finest credentials. NICK Ah, the Theologian speaks. SWAMI You do me a great honor. But I am a mere renunciate. I have no credentials as you would know them. SEN. BLAKE Well, we politicians are not entirely without a grasp of the World's religions. NICK And the Statesman. MRS. BLAKE Marvelous, Senator. GISSELLE He can speak for himself, remember? SEN. BLAKE The floor is yours. SWAMI Justin and I became closest of companions. We shared a similar interest. GISSELLE When did Justin develop an interest in Hinduism?

NICK Probably when he realized none of his dozen or so shrinks in the English speaking world were doing him any good. SWAMI Justin was unable to find peace through-- NICK (twirling a finger beside his temple) --Psycho - analysis. MRS. BLAKE From what? In what? SWAMI His ••• self •• NICK Ah, there's the rub •• Justin ran off to India to discover his self! Hell, he could have done that in California. (laughs) SWAMI (truly puzzled) Western humor is so ••• strange. NICK Well, Eastern lack of it is even stranger. THE SWAMI smiles slowly at Nick - in such a strange way - that he is made nervous again. SWAMI Oh, I think you will find our humor quite fascinating. (continuing) It is well understood in Hindu thought that there is an ultimate level of divinity; a nonpersonal, nonchanging Supreme Being which is

Brahman. It is every Hindu’s goal to reach Brahman - but first, one must discover Atman, the individual self. What is death and what is killing?

The answer is that man is not identified by the body alone but with body and Atman. The Atman was there yesterday, it is there today

and it will live forever. Therefore the words, kill or die cannot be properly applied to Atman. On the other hand, the body which is

perishable, will definitely die whether today or after 100 years. Since the Atman definitely acquires another bBody , according to the karma, there is nothing to lament for.

This Atman is never born nor does it ever die. It is unborn, ever-lasting,

immutable and primeval. It is not killed though the body is killed.

THE MESSAGE OF THE UPANISHADS

To understand the message of the Upanishads, one may get some help from Fig.

3 which shows concentric shells which are four in total. This figure also shows a

direction indicated by an arrow. The smaller the radii of the shells the subtler

are these things for the humans to understand them. For example, a human body

represented by the outermost shell is the easiest to see and comprehend. A

physical pain in the body can be very easily explained even by a child but it

would be relatively difficult for him to explain his mental conditions. Our body

has five sense organs or they can also be called as the equipments for the

perception of the external world. The mind contains memory and it is also a seat

for internal emotions and disturbances. Therefore it is referred to as the internal

equipment which shows the internal condition of a person. The mind is subtler

than the body. If we go further inside, we reach the intellect which is the ability

of discrimination. To achieve this ability one should be able to judge right or

wrong actions etc.. The subtlest of all is the Atman which is considered to be pure

consciousness in the Upanishads. It is qualitiless and is not affected by sorrow or

pleasure experienced by the human beings. This is the Real Self and not separate

from the Creator. It can neither be wetted by water nor burnt by fire. It lives

through the Kalpas. 4.32 billion years…at the end of a Kalpa the world is annihilated The

Atman is not affected by birth or death. These are only the outer three shells

which are affected.

Intense Quote:

I got on a plane and went to Mumbai to figure out how to adapt a story Vikas

Swarup called Q and A. In Mumbai, there’s none of this complexity about love

that Western cinema has. Over there, it’s really straightforward: it’s just “Me,

you, love—let’s go!” My writing has become utterly different. I won’t ever write

in the same way again having been to that city.

Simon Beaufoy, screenwriter of Slumdog Millionaire (Strong)

CONTINUED: NICK Still sounds like California to me. SEN. BLAKE I believe the Swami is referring to various means of mental, spiritual, and uh, physical exercise. NICK (competing) Meditation, worship, and uh, Yoga? SWAMI Precisely, though much simplified. Brahman and Atman, though seemingly apart, are one and the same. THE SWAMI directs their attention to an engraved plaque which reads: "THAT ART THOU." SWAMI(con't) That art thou. GISSELLE (slowly, trying to understand) That - art - thou ••• (sighs) ••• one and the same. THEIR EYES meet. There is something there she knows but cannot place. MRS. BLAKE, having grown displeased, moves. MRS. BLAKE Oh please, I don't want a lesson in religion! I just want to know what happened to Justin. Why are we here? Why are we here?!

SHE falls into her husband's chest; cruelly he pushes her aside and heads for the bar. She is left standing, crying. “When perception, as we understand it, is once admitted, memory must arise, and that this memory has

not, any more than perception itself, a cerebral state as its true and complete condition.”

Henri Bergson, 1895 (French Script MT 14)

JUSTIN'S VOICE(O.S.) Don't cry Mother, I understand. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l8CDERzun4k As someone sets light to the first fire of autumn We settle down to cut ourselves apart. Cough and twitch from the news on your face And some foreign candle burning in your eyes Held to the past too aware of the pending Chill as the dawn breaks and finds us up for sale. Enter the fog another low road descending Away from the cold lust, you house and summertime. Blind to the last cursed affair pistols and countless eyes A trail of white blood betrays the reckless route your craft is running Feed till the sun turns into wood dousing an ancient torch Loiter the whole day through and lose yourself in lines dissecting love. Your name on my cast and my notes on your stay Offer me little but doting on a crime. We've turned every stone and for all our inventions In matters of love loss, we've no recourse at all. Blind to the last cursed affair pistols and countless eyes A trail of white blood betrays the reckless route your craft is running Feed till the sun turns into wood dousing an ancient torch Loiter the whole day through and lose yourself in lines dissecting love. Startled, she spins to the Swami, having felt him to be the voice, only she has heard. He smiles. She is calmed. SWAMI Justin came to me as a student, in search of truth. (CONTINUED) ••• Arthur Schopenhauer was influenced by the Vedas and Upanishads; in his own words: "If the reader has also received the benefit of the Vedas, the access to which by means of the Upanishads is in my eyes the greatest privilege which this still young century (1818) may claim before all previous centuries, if then the reader, I say, has received his initiation in primeval Indian wisdom, and received it with an open heart, he will be prepared in the very best way for hearing what I have to tell him." (The World as Will and Representation) CONTINUED: Sen. Blake moves to the bar where he PLUNKS a couple ice cubes in a glass. SWAMI Water, of any form •••

SEN. BLAKE raises his eyebrows and cradles his drink. The SWAMI pauses by the window, draws back the curtain. SWAMI(con't) ••• trees, flowers, stones, plants, insects, animals - all may be found worthy of veneration. GISSELLE And this confused Justin?

Puja

SWAMI Puja, or worship of a God by way of his image or an abstract symbol necessitates complex rituals. Devotional, or technical skills if you will, must be mastered. THE SWAMI has drawn close to Nick who grows more uncomfortable. He lifts a figurine of Shiva. GISSELLE Oh yes, what is that? SWAMI This is an image of Shiva, the God of destruction and regeneration.

lin·gam (l ng g m) also lin·ga (l n g )

He turns the figuring upside down. Lightly laughs. SWAMI Made in China. MRS. BLAKE (somewhat frightened) These ••• devotional skills what did he have to do? NICK Probably lie on a bed of nails. MRS. BLAKE (shocked) Oh no, no! He would never have done that! SWAMI (to Nick) Would you consider crucifying yourself?

NICK (stunned) What?! SWAMI To venerate Christ, of course. Silence. SWAMI I thought not. And neither would Justin have performed a mystic’s trick to honor Brahma or Vishnu. No ••• it is expert use of the elements which Justin mastered. Water, light, sound, flowers, grasses, leaves ••• HE stoops beside Nick and picks up the fallen matches. and matchbook. SWAMI(con't) ••• and fire ••• (to Nick) which some find particularly difficult to master.,bu~~··\~f\{-¥1\~~., Nick squints. The SWAMI tosses the burned matches into a wastebasket, saving the matchbook. Sliding the small box open to reveal the unburned matches, so that only the striking end is visible, he presents himself to Nick. SWAMI(con't) Allow me. After a moment's hesitation, Nick draws a fresh cigarette from his case and, leaning forward, places it between his lips. The SWAMI extends his arm displaying the box of matches. Smiles. Nick looks up bewildered. NICK We11? Suddenly, the MATCHES ignite. Nick jumps, naturally. (CONTINUED)

-----------------------------------------------------------------

------------~--- CONTINUED: SWAMI Go on. Trembling, Nick lights his cigarette, then slumps back in his chair exhaling with notable verve. With all spellbound, the Swami calmly closes the box then tosses them into Nick's lap. SWAMI (takes a stem of incense) It was not only fire, but this final element of which Justin sought the greatest mastery. MRS. BLAKE Incense? SWAMI Scent. The sense of smell. MRS. BLAKE Justin considered the sense of smell important? GISSELLE But I thought he just wanted to find him - his self • _ ,~ ~..r<- , (..,~' SWAMI Smell is the only sense~to communicate directly with the brain. The others relay data through the thalamus before reaching the cortex, which as you know, receives sensations and controls our basic urges and emotions: Y •• (to Nick) e •• aggression •••

(to Sen. Blake) •• fear ••• (to Mrs. Blake) ••• and sex. HE replaces the incense and seats himself behind the desk, ~ having completely circled the room. SWAMI(con't) It is therefore believed the mind can be manipulated through the nose. SEN. BLAKE (becoming increasingly drunk) That's ridiculous! How would you know? SWAMI Justin and I did a great deal of

research into pathologia. Etymology:

New Latin pathologia & Middle French pathologie, from Greek pathologia study

of the emotions, from path- + -logia -logy

Date:

1611

SWAMI It was in fact how we met. GISSELLE Oh, really? Tell me how you-- SEN. BLAKE -- wait a minute. Pathology is the study of diseases. What has that got to do with smelling? SWAMI Patho - logia. Greek. The study of the emotions. SEN. BLAKE (quietly) Oh. SWAMI But meanings change. Emotions. Diseases. What’s the difference? (to Gisselle, sweetly) We met in a fragrance shop. We were both looking for a certain

SWAMI (Con’t) fragrance and ••• discovered each other. (continuing) You see, Senator Blake, unlike a telephone number or the color of someone’s eyes or even a melody, the memory of a scent is fed directly into the brain’s data bank. And these memories can be recalled and replayed years after other sensory impressions have been lost - and therefore liken to emotions. NICK (quietly stolid) Bravo. SWAMI In fact, was it not said that the smell of the incense caused someone to recall a pot party once attended? CONTINUED: NICK stutters and fidgets; obviously the thought of having this guilt placed on him is monstrously embarrassing. NICK I didn't say - I never - I only said it reminded me of a teenager's pot party. I never said I was a participant. (pause) Besides, I said that before you were even here! SWAMI You said that before you noticed I was here. GISSELLE Bravo. SEN. BLAKE I wasn't aware that Justin was such a scientist. Did he do any other "research" or did he die trying to unlock the secrets of the nose? SWAMI Justin found most fascinating and indeed conclusive the writings of Wilhelm Fliess. Would you care to-- SEN. BLAKE -- no.

SWAMI Dr. Wilhelm Fleiss was an associate of Sigmund Freud. NICK He should know him. SWAMI Dr. Fleiss believed that the right fragrance could act as an aphrodisiac and regarded the nose as man's most important sexual organ. NICK (to Gisselle) Listen up. -------------------------------------------------------------------------

Christakis and his colleague James Fowler at the University of California, San Diego, are now studying happiness contagion

in perhaps the largest social network of all, Facebook. They noticed

that people who smiled in their Facebook pro file pictures tended to have other friends who smiled. This

might simply be peer pressure at work, with members feeling obliged to flash

a smile to fit in with the rest of the group, but Christakis and Fowler are investigating whether there isn’t a more infectious

phenomenon at work.

If you still aren’t convinced that your doomsaying ways can ever be changed, consider this: only about 25% of a person’s

optimism may be hardwired in his genes, according to some studies. That’s in con trast to the 40% to 60% heritability of most

other personality traits, like agree ableness and conscientiousness. Science suggests that the greater part of an opti mystic outlook

can be acquired with the right instruction-a theory borne out in a study of college freshmen by Seligman. Pessimistic students

who took a I2-week optimism-training course devised by Seligman-which included exercises like writing a letter of gratitude

then reading it aloud to someone-were less likely to visit the student health center for illnesses during the next four years than

their similarly pessimistic peers who weren’t tutored in positive thinking. And a larger study of more than 3,000 middle-school

students who are being taught resilience techniques is under way in England. "It’s the largest-scale validation that optimism can

be taught," says Seligman, who devil oped the techniques used in the study.

The thing about being optimistic, though, is that it takes hard work-and that’s a drag. It’s an active process, say psychologists,

through which you force yourself to see your life a certain way. Indeed, the leading optimism and happiness experts consider

themselves born pessimists. But if they have learned over time and with lots of practice to become more hopeful, take heart. So

can you .•

TIME April 6, 2009

CONTINUED: SEN. BLAKE And just how did he conclusify that statement? SWAMI Some scientists and laymen believe that human pheromones exist. SEN. BLAKE That's patently absurd. Pheromones only exist in animals. It's what draws the male dog to the female when she's in heat. SWAMI Perhaps, nevertheless behavioral responses continue to exert subconscious influences. It is a fact that people who lose their sense of smell also lose much of their sex drive. MRS. BLAKE (too fast) Oh, honey! Could that be why'~- SEN. BLAKE Shut up! GISSELLE I've read that excessive drinking can damage nasal membranes. SEN. BLAKE (vehemently) I wasn't aware you had time to read between affairs - so little time elapses. ON GISSELLE - hurt. --------------------------------------------------------- CUT TO: SAME INT.- LATER THE SWAMI is in the lotus position, eyes closed, meditating on the platform that Justin’s casket rests upon. NICK How long is he going to do this? (CONTINUED) CONTINUED: SEN. BLAKE What are you so impatient about? Got a bonfire to attend? NICK No, a chain saw massacre.

GISSELLE Please you two, stop it. Can't you both just be patient? NICK Well, if you like being locked in a room with a corpse GISSELLE -- He's your brother! NICK Was! And good riddance THE SWAMI awakens. SWAMI It is time. Startled, the others fall silent. After a moment - NICK Well ••• for what? SWAMI Please for all of you to make a circle on the floor sitting as I do •• NICK Are you kidding?! SEN. BLAKE You want to get out of here? Do what he says! Reluctantly, they obey. MRS. BLAKE This is very strange. I don't know if I can even sit like that.

CONTINUED: With no little amount of confusion, the four have managed to create a circle in the center of the room, all sitting “Yoga style.” NICK I feel like I'm in P.E. in school. Like when we had to learn square dancing on rainy days. GISSELLE Be quiet. NICK Why? Is this a séance? Nick looks to the Swami for an answer - none comes. NICK Good. I want no part in bringing Justin back from the dead. SEN. BLAKE swings to strike him, but Nick avoids his hand. NICK Sorry old man, but we're not kids any more. (pause) Soon we shall all know the deepest, the darkest secrets of the mystical world of Hinduism. Let the fun begin. SWAMI Try - to concentrate. Nick feigns an intense expression, rolls his eyes. / / ~ SWAMI There are in fact five forms of Yoga, but for the sake of this demonstration, I will describe only one - the one Justin mastered - Hatha Yoga, for he felt he was working against a time clock. .• SEN. BLAKE Of sanity? SWAHI Perhaps. Perhaps not his own. (CONTINUED)

, - The central question of The Culture of Narcissism is the following: why one type of mental problem replaced

another as a dominant mental problem in the US. Why were clients with strong symptoms of classic neuroses

replaced by people with 'diffuse dissatisfactions'. Why were patients, instead of 'debilitating fixations of phobias' or

'conversion of repressed sexual energy into nervous ailments', come with 'vague, diffuse dissatisfactions with life'

with feeling 'amorphous existence' with 'violent oscillations of self-esteem', with 'a general inability to get along'.

Why was the rigorous inner sensor replaced with

'chaotic and impulse-ridden character. The new patients 'lack the capacity to mourn, because the

intensity of their rage against lost love objects... [They are] sexually promiscuous... [but] they

nevertheless find it difficult to "elaborate the sexual impulse" or to approach sex in the spirit of play.

They avoid close involvements, which might release intense feelings of rage. Their personalities consist

largely of defenses against this rage... Often these patients suffer from hypochondria and complain of a

sense of inner emptiness. At the same time they entertain fantasies of omnipotence and a strong belief in

their right to exploit others and be gratified... [The patient has to attach himself] to someone, living an

almost parasitic existence. At the same time, his fear of emotional dependence, together with his

manipulative, exploitive approach to personal relations, makes these relations bland, superficial, and

deeply unsatisfying... As a psychiatric patient, the narcissist is a prime candidate for interminable

analysis... The strength of his defenses, however, makes him resistant to successful analysis... To be able

to enjoy life in a process of involving a growing identification with other people's happiness and

achievements is tragically beyond the capacity of narcissistic personalities.' (p. 37-41) -- http://www.reviews.ctpdc.co.uk/lasch.html ------------------------------------------------------------- ..• CONTINUED: SWAMI Hatha Yoga has gained the most notice in the west because of the spectacular feats accomplished and witnessed by reputable observers. MRS. BLAKE You mean like sitting in a small box for an hour. GISSELLE Oh, mother, for God's sake! SWAMI Consider that child's play. Compare if you will, being buried alive in the earth sustaining one's heartbeat at such a severely ~~~~~~ reduced rate that it is virtually undetectable – and arising three days and nights later completely alive resurrected! MRS. BLAKE (astonished) Could Justin do that?! Slowly, all heads turn to the CASKET, expecting to see Justin leap forth. CLOSE SHOT of his face - serene, but not about to move. NICK That's enough of this crap! I don't like the implication you're making with this demonstration.

(Continued) NICK Three days and nights! Certainly you don't expect us to believe Jesus Christ was a practitioner of Yoga! SWAMI That was not my intention. GISSELLE You mean to say Justin could do that? (CONTINUED) --------------------------------------------------------------------

-------------~I CONTINUED: NICK storms away from the circle The Sanskrit word yoga has many meanings,[10] and is derived from the Sanskrit root yuj, meaning "to control", "to yoke" or "to unite".[ NICK I've had enough of this game~ You've been filling our heads with this Hindu junk for hours now, just so we'll understand why Justin would go for this~ Well what the Hell are we supposed to make of people who bury themselves in the damn

ground! As if they've got nothing better to do - they're starving by the millions. They should be thinking of a way to feed themselves! GISSELLE Oh! What's this? A fleeting moment of humanitarianism? Coming from mister pro nuclear bomb himself. NICK And you, the bleeding heart liberal! Let's spend millions of dollars on people who live in the dirt. Hiding in the womb of some self-hypnotic religion does nothing to prevent world war. GISSELLE And neither does creating more bombs! NICK You are so naive. It is their presence that's necessary, not their detonation. It's more a matter of deterring those who would~ SEN. BLAKE He's right. For once in his life, he's right •. GISSELLE He is not! NICK Besides, bombs become obsolete almost as soon as they're built. For everyone made, there's a laser blast or a … twist of atoms to disintegrate it. GISSELLE And there's always something to replace it - something bigger and more powerful. NICK And something to destroy it. GISSELLE And another one invincible to that! SEN. BLAKE And something to destroy it! GISSELLE And so on and so on.

MRS. BLAKE Stop it! Stop it! Please! What does any of this have to do with Justin? I just want to know why he killed himself. GISSELLE Mother, Justin certainly saw the triviality of life as easily as we just have. It's never-ending •• It's pointless. It might be the reason he wanted to •••• die. MRS. BLAKE No! No, I don't believe that .• Justin would never have ••• quit. THEY have all risen now in the heat of the argument. MRS ..BLAKE(con't) There must have been something else. Something he wanted •• (CONTINUED) CONTINUED: GISSELLE Yes, something he was willing to die for. SEN. BLAKE He wanted us to know. NICK He planned it this way - purposely! MRS. BLAKE What? What was it? Tell us what he wanted! ZOOM IN on the Swami's face and eyes. SWAMI The Kundalini - the Serpent Power. FADE OUT:

However, the intensive spiritual practices associated with some Asian traditions are not without

their problems. Psychiatric literature [20]

notes that "Since the influx of eastern spiritual practices

and the rising popularity of meditation starting in the 1960s, many people have experienced a

variety of psychological difficulties, either while engaged in intensive spiritual practice or

spontaneously". Among the psychological difficulties associated with intensive spiritual practice

we find "kundalini awakening","a complex physio-psychospiritual transformative process

described in the yogic tradition" [20]

. Also, researchers in the fields of Transpersonal

psychology,[21]

and Near-death studies[22][23]

describe a complex pattern of sensory, motor,

mental and affective symptoms associated with the concept of Kundalini, sometimes called the

Kundalini Syndrome.

Scotton, Bruce (1996) The phenomenology and treatment of kundalini, in Chinen,

Scotton and Battista (Editors) (1996) Textbook of transpersonal psychiatry and

psychology. (pp.261-270). New York, NY, US: Basic Books, Inc.

Turner, Robert P.; Lukoff, David; Barnhouse, Ruth Tiffany & Lu Francis G. (1995)

Religious or Spiritual Problem. A Culturally Sensitive Diagnostic Category in the DSM-

IV. Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease,Vol.183, No. 7 435-444

Kason, Yvonne (2000) Farther Shores: Exploring How Near-Death, Kundalini and Mystical Experiences Can Transform Ordinary Lives. Toronto: Harper Collins Publishers, Revised edition, ISBN 0-00-638624-5

ACT IV FADE IN: SAME INT. – LATER The SWAMI stands before the desk, holding a small box~ The rest await his word with anticipation~ SWAMI It is time for all of you to know what Justin sought - and found~ In this box lay the secrets of his past~ And to each of you he has willed a part~ Various looks of dismay~ From the box, the Swami produces four tiny vials of colored liquid, each sealed and labeled~ SWAMI (holding one) For Gisselle •• GISSELLE (surprised) Oh? She comes forward and takes the vial •• SWAMI For Mother_ Come Mrs.~ Blake~ Timidly, she complies~ SWAMI Father. Senator Blake •• He does the same •• NICK Anything there for me in your little black box, Oz? The Swami draws the fourth and last vial from the box~tosses it to Nick who catches it deftly as if he feared it were nitroglycerin~ NICK Now do I click my heals? What is it? Are they all the same? GISSELLE I think it's perfume, or cologne~ tV\d :r \.16+ W ~1:J"~~ e;.\wtJ.'t~ 1\e..~Jc..J. (CONTINUED) CONTINUED:

Pause •• SEN •.BLAKE Well Swami, what's the meaning of this? Justin kills himself just to will us all a bottle of perfume? SWAMI They are all the same - yet each has its own personal effect on whomever experiences its scent •. C,<.) V" :~~ (:~.\ .X:.'2 (" NICK Experiences, huh? What, does it get you high? Is this some kind of weird Indian hallucinogenic that Justin cooked up in his lab? SWAMI It is called "The Essence of Remembrance." NICK This is it? I travelled 60 miles to this - mausoleum - for a bottle of "The Essence of Remembrance?" What the hell is that supposed to mean? SWAMI That is up to you •. NICK How profound! I knew you would say something like that - and I knew to expect this of Justin •. MRS. BLAKE Nicky, why do you resent him so? Why do you hate him? He was your brother - he never did anything to hurt you .• NICK Why Mother, why? Isn't it obvious? Don't you really know? Speaking of smells, I think it stinks the way you only loved him •• Talk about an Oedipus Complex. You and that kid were a walking Freud handbook! CONTINUED:

MRS. BLAKE

That's not true! I never - I swear -- 'The "immature, narcissistic" American

mother "is so barren of spontaneous manifestation of maternal feelings" that she redoubles her

dependence on outside advice. "She studies vigilantly all the new methods of upbringing and reads

treatises about psychical and mental hygiene." She acts not on her own feelings or judgment but on the

"picture of what a good mother should be."' (p. 170)

'The narcissistic mother's incessant yet curiously perfunctory attentions to her child interfere at every

point with the mechanism of optimal frustration. Because she so often sees the child as an extension of

herself, she lavishes attentions on the child that are "awkwardly out of touch" with his needs, providing

him with an excess of seemingly solicitous care but with little real warmth. By treating the child as an

"exclusive possession", she encourages an exaggerated sense of his own importance; at the same time

she makes it difficult for him to acknowledge his disappointment in her shortcomings. In schizophrenia,

the disjunction between the child's perceptions of his mother's shallow, perfunctory care and her

apparently undivided devotion becomes so painful that the child refuses to acknowledge it. Regressive

defenses, "loss of the boundaries of the self", delusions of omniscience, and magical thinking appear, in

milder form, in narcissistic disorders.' (p 171) SEN. BLAKE Shut up Nick! Just shut up! NICK No, you shut up - you drunken, impotent ••~ sadist! SEN. BLAKE Damn you! The Senator makes a desperate lunge at Nick who easily sidesteps him, sending him crashing to the floor. NICK And look at her, sweet Gisselle always so loving, so protective of dear perfect Justin - always there to make him feel better - always on his side. Well, where were you darling sister when Justin was busy offing himself? At a mass orgy? Quickly and furiously, Gisselle has managed to slap Nick hard. Stunned, but not silenced, he continues his raving. NICK(con't) Oh, I see it now. It's all clear. Justin's final play on all of us. A psychological dragging out of his past - so that we must relive all the horrible atrocities that we perpetuated on his poor, innocent childhood. The Essence of Remembrance! Isn't that right? Isn't that what it means, eh Guru?

ANOTHER ANGLE - the Swami is gone. GISSELLE He's gone! NICK How dramatic .• GISSELLE I don't blame him. SHE moves to the desk, finding the box .• GISSELLE He left something. Discovering a small scroll in the box, she unrolls it. GISSELLE (reading) THE KUNDALINI POWER. Their attention is suddenly focused. Nick freezes. GISSELLE(con't) (reading) Said to lie in quiescent state at the base of the spine, the Kundalini is a sleeping snake which if awakened will raise itself up the spinal cord passing five wheels of psychic energy. The uniting of this Kundalini with the potent lotus center in the skull gives a yogi extraordinary powers, not only over himself, but over other life forces and phenomena. FOUR SHOT - THEIR FACES, bewildered. NICK That's it. I'm leaving. NICK bolts for the door once more - stops - reconsiders. GISSELLE It's in Justin's handwriting. MRS. BLAKE Was he bitten by a snake? SEN. BLAKE Oh, for God’s sakes. What's the meaning of these vials? What are we supposed to do with them? Does it say? GISSELLE Yes.

GISSELLE (reading) To discover the Essence of Remembrance, we must open and smell the contents. SEN. BLAKE Well, I'm not going to smell the damned stuff~ No telling what it will do~ MRS.BLAKE I'm frightened. Why would Justin do this to us. NICK Oh, come now, Senator – where’s your:'(' -spirit of adventure •• GISSELLE There's more. (reading) This is my final request: that each of you take this experience. Gather yourselves, one at each corner of my casket, and at the same time - uncork your vial. This is the only way my spirit will find peace. There is a definite stillness to the air as all EYES fall upon - THE CASKET •• NICK Well there you have it: Justin's destiny is in our hands - or noses rather •• GISSELLE It's his last request. We have to do it .• MRS. BLAKE Oh dear, it was his last request .• SEN. BLAKE This is ridiculous •• NICK Scared, Father? Determined, Sen. Blake sobers himself and stands •• SEN. BLAKE (to Nick) You first •• NICK

Anything to get this over with •• rajasik (CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: Nick takes his place at the casket. The others nervously follow, holding their vials. NICK (con' t) Well ••• are we ready? FOUR SHOTS - THEY NOD NICK(con't) Then on the count of three. (slowly) One ••• two ••• three! At once, they all uncork their vials and lift them to their noses - breathe in. Pause. They look at each other, waiting. Nothing. Then, slowly the air before them begins to change color - becomes opaque. Then-

French term or phrase: grand récit

"...les citoyens ont perdu toute confiance dans les grands récits et les

grandes utopies. Ils sont devenus sceptiques face aux grands projets

de société, car ils sont devenus pragmatiques et recherchent des

solutions fonctionnelles."

Crystal Samples

United States

Local time: 11:56

high-flown rhetoric

Explanation:

ornate rhetoric, elaborate rhetoric, grandiose rhetoric etc. - some ideas

that may spark a few more.

representamen: the sign that denotes the object (cf. Saussure's "signifier"); object: anything that can be thought, whether as a concept or thing, so long as it is capable of

being encoded in a sign; and interpretant: the meaning obtained by decoding or interpreting the sign which may be:

o immediate, i.e. the denotative meaning, o dynamical, i.e. the meaning actually produced by the sign, or o final, i.e. the meaning that would be produced if the sign were properly understood.

Peirce explained that signs mediate the relationship between their objects and their interpretants

in a triadic mental process. Firstness

111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111

is a general state of mind in which there is awareness of the environment, a prevailing emotion,

and a sense of the possibilities. This is the mind in neutral, waiting to formulate thought.

Secondness

22222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222222

moves from possibility to greater certainty shown by action, reaction, causality, or reality. Here

the mind identifies what message is to be communicated. Thirdness

333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333

is the mode of signs shown in representation, continuity, order, and unity. The signs thought

most likely to convey the intended meaning are selected and the communication process is

initiated. This will involve either interpersonal behaviour using nonverbal systems to supplement

verbal meaning through intonation, facial expression, or gesture, or as in the exercise of

producing this page, the writing and iterative editing process to arrive at the final selection of

words now appearing.

Molino and Nattiez's diagram:

Poietic Process Esthesic Process

"Producer" → Trace ← Receiver

(Nattiez 1990, p. 17)

It is now agreed that the effectiveness of the acts that may convert the message into text

(including speaking, writing, drawing and physical movements) depends upon the knowledge of

the sender. If the sender is not familiar with the current language, its codes and its culture then he

or she will not be able to say anything at all, whether as a visitor in a different language area or

because of a medical condition such as aphasia (see Roman Jakobson).

Justin could not—did not—speak, or, therefore, understand Hindi. Aphasia (from Greek,

aphatos : 'speechless'), also known as rhymnasia, is a loss of the ability to produce and/or

comprehend language, due to injury to brain areas specialized for these functions, such as

Broca's area, which governs language production, or Wernicke's area, which governs the

interpretation of language. It is not a result of deficits in sensory, intellectual, or psychiatric

functioning,[1]

nor due to muscle weakness or a cognitive disorder.

1. ^ Brookshire, 1992; Goodglass 1993

2. http://www.shabdkosh.com/

3. thirdness

4. . पर ! 5. और

और आप और

.

! 6. This is what Microsoft Word does when you copy and paste a lovely phrase in Hindi.

Date English Hindi User

06 Apr 09 chewable amit_btb

03 Apr 09 cleanness amit_btb

30 Mar 09 conclusion guest

29 Mar 09 installer guest

29 Mar 09 adjoined bsskchaitanya

23 Mar 09 Contract bsskchaitanya

22 Mar 09 death penalty amit_btb

Signs and signifiers.

CUT TO: EXT. A BEAUTIFUL POND IN A WOOD - DAY The FOUR are suddenly standing in the scene – Gisselle in the f.g. Sitting by the pond are GISSELLE AND JUSTIN as they were as children, smiling and silently talking, enjoying the serenity of the landscape. THE SENATOR, HIS WIFE, AND NICK struggle, but are unable to move or speak. They are like statues with living eyes. GISSELLE (frightened and enthralled at the same time) Yes! Yes, I know this. SHE steps forward, inhaling deeply. GISSELLE(con't) This is what is in my vial - every thing - the trees, the grass, the flowers, the sky, the water. Gasping, SHE sees herself and Justin, as boy and girl. GISSELLE (wonderfully astonished) That's ME! And JUSTIN! This is where we used to come to hide. SHE begins to cry with joy, once lost and now re-found. GISSELLE(con’t )//-'\ It's so beautiful" I had forgotten.> it all •• YOUNG JUSTIN turns to her, seeing her •• He smiles sweetly and waves his little hand •• Astonished, she waves back, tears running down her face •• She reaches for him, and he for her . . A teenage boy appears and waves from a distance to YOUNG GISSELLE. YOUNG GISSELLE rises and goes to him, leaving Justin sitting alone by the lake. All present look to Gisselle. GISSELLE (somewhat defensively) I couldn’t be his only company forever… •• everything begins to fade •• DISSOLVE TO:

INT. THE BASEMENT TOOL SHOP OF THE BLAKE’S HOME – DAY THE FOUR now stand within this scene, Sen. Blake in the f••g••, horrified, instantly recognizing. Behind him stand the others, frozen, staring like angry jurors. SEN. BLAKE What is this? What the hell is this? CAN'T ANY OF YOU HEAR ME? This can't be happening! The SCREAM of a circular saw pierces the air •• Sen. Blake spins to the sound and GASPS. HIS POV - himself, fifteen years younger, in work clothes, sawing a board with a loud circular saw. YOUNG JUSTIN watches •• SEN. BLAKE SAWDUST! My vial smells of sawdust •• And OIL - oil for the saw .• No, NO! HE tries desperately to throw the vial from his hand--it sticks - as if by will. SEN. BLAKE I don't want to remember this! As he watches in horror, the others staring, the episode repeats itself •• YOUNGER BLAKE, looking with evil sadism at YOUNG JUSTIN, pretends to shear off his own hand •• HE screams insanely as fake blood gushes from the empty socket of his wrist •• A plastic hand falls to the floor, amidst a pool of red~ YOUNG JUSTIN SCREAMS in terror. Laughing wildly, YOUNGER BLAKE produces his real hand from within the sleeve of his shirt~ YOUNGER BLAKE Fooled ya' didn’t I? It's just a trick! A joke! YOUNGER BLAKE then steps menacingly closer to YOUNG JUSTIN, causing the circular saw’s blade to spin and spin, making its awful SOUND~ YOUNG JUSTIN backs away in terror, falling into a pile of cut wood and sawdust~ Shards of wood and glass cut his face and hands. SEN. BLAKE (appealing to the others) I didn't mean it - I didn't! It was just a joke - a practical joke! I didn't mean for him to get hurt!

THE THREE others stare. Gasping, Sen. Blake spins back toward the scene~ YOUNG JUSTIN turns to face him - a look of profound childish hurt on his face. SEN. BLAKE Justin, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, OK? I didn't mean it. YOUNG JUSTIN stands and picks up the circular saw. YOUNGER BLAKE turns also, and now menacingly approaches Sen. Blake. YOUNG JUSTIN comes at him, spinning the blade. The Senator backs away. YOUNG JUSTIN puts his hand in front of the spinning blade, saws it off. SEN. BLAKE NOOOOO! ! ! DISSOLVE TO: INT. THE BLAKES' BEDROOM – NIGHT Again, the FOUR mysteriously appear into the past •.. MRS. BLAKE finds herself standing at the foot of her own bed, as it appeared many years earlier •..She too gasps at the sight designed for her to experience again •.. HER POV - herself, many years younger, in bed with a man not her husband MRS. BLAKE (shocked) That smell! No, it couldn't be •.. Not him - the smell of – She spins to her husband - humiliated •.. MRS. BLAKE He meant nothing - nothing. You never knew •. After Justin was born you wouldn't make love to me - you couldn't. The DOOR to the bedroom opens slowly, light spilling in •. YOUNG JUSTIN steps innocently in •.. MRS. BLAKE Don't come in •. YOUNG JUSTIN Mommy? It’s dinnertime. YOUNGER MRS. BLAKE AND MAN make love, unaware YOUNG JUSTIN has neared the bed •..He watches in confused wonder at his mother's changing expressions .• r O--L.~'/ I· " """'ti (-.~ IJ 7/vlH~)

Slowly her eyes open - react •.. YOUNGER ~MRS.BLAKE Justin. Hi sweetie. Just a minute. THE MAN lifts his head - eyes Justin. Justin backs away scared .• MRS. BLAKE Really. This kind of thing happens all the time, I’m sure. How was I to know he’d make so much of it? YOUNG JUSTIN turns and comes near her. MRS. BLAKE Hi baby. Let me hold you. I'm sorry, I know you never told. You were always such a good boy. He comes nearer. MRS. BLAKE Yes baby, yes. Please let me hold you. He stops - outstretched arms - a hurt face penetrating her heart then - FADES AWAY. The OTHERS take his place - staring judgmentally. She cries - then - 'DISSOLVE TO: EXT: THE BLAKE’S BACKYARD - YEARS EARLIER – DAY The four are now suddenly in the past once more, NICK in the f.g. He is panic stricken by this aberration. NICK Wait, no! This isn't what I smelled. I don't know why I'm here. YOUNGER JUSTIN, 15, sits in a lover's swing with his first girl friend, a pretty girl his age. They are holding hands. NICK That's Justin and his girlfriend. This can't be! This was ten years ago. YOUNGER NICK stealthily approaches the couple, a cigarette in his lips. They are unaware. Vengefully, he attacks, knocking YOUNGER JUSTIN unconscious. The girl tries to run - NICK I didn’t do that! Nick overcomes her - forces her into the nearby-

SHED - INT. - DAY The four are now within the shed, Nick in F.G. HE watches in helpless humiliation as he sees – HIS POV - YOUNGER NICK rapes the girl. NICK I didn't do it - it didn’t happen that way. The girl cries, helpless. Younger Nick stands, triumphantly lights a cigarette - throws the match – Suddenly, the floor of the wooden shed—-filled with sawdust--is in flames. NICK Gasoline! That’s the smell. There was gasoline all over the damn floor! It was an accident - The girl screams - her tattered dress has caught fire. Panicking, YOUNGER NICK bolts for the door - escapes. NICK That's not the way it happened. I tried to help her - I swear! EXT. – The SHED roars in flames. We HEAR the screams of the girl, trapped. They continue throughout-- YOUNGER JUSTIN has recovered. He stumbles toward the shed, agonized. He then turns to elder Nick - fury in his eyes. NICK Justin! I swear-- (to the others) Help me! YOUNGER JUSTIN is before him, his arms raised towards Nick's face. Suddenly they burst into flames, like torches. Nick screams insanely, cowers. CLOSE ON THE FLAMES - brighter - whiter. Nick's SCREAMS – CUT TO:

(CONTINUED) CONTINUED: INT. - OPENING SETTING - SAME TIME NICK'S SCREAMS continue, even as the others discover themselves around the casket again~ Nick catches himself~ A SERIES OF QUICK SHOTS THE CASKET – EMPTY THEIR FACES – SHOCKED THE ROOM-- ANGLE ON JUSTIN - standing, in a linen robe. Strangely, none are struck with fear - but with wonder and love. Justin reaches out his arms - Gisselle slowly comes to him .• GISSELLE (utterly confused) You're not •••• ? JUSTIN Yes. http://essenceofremembrance.blogspot.com/