The Courier Week 12

Friday, May 13, 2011Edition 12 www.thecourier.es

LORCA CRUMBLES90,000 sleep on the streets as biggest quake for 50 years hits medieval town

By Dave Bull in LorcaAS I walked the streets of Lorca yesterday morn-ing, Lorca was still shrouded in the eerie quietwhich had descended on the town since the sec-ond of two devastating earthquakes that killed atleast two pregnant women and up to eight othersthe previous evening. People stood around either stunned or with noth-

ing else to do. Their home, business or job gone,there was nothing left for these poor people to doother than wait. What they were waiting fornobody seemed to be sure, apart from the hopethat the authorities would somehow organise theessentials that we normally take for granted, suchas water and power and food.

Lorca’s 90,000 population suffered onWednesday, with at least 130 injured and damageeverywhere you look in this beautiful and historictown. Every building I passed had been affected insome way and every street had a similar story. Intotal, some 20,000 buildings are estimated to havebeen damaged by the quakes.

Devastating

On Wednesday evening at 6.45pm the secondand most devastating tremor hit Lorca. A quakeregistering 4.4 on the Richter scale had rocked thetown at five o’clock without causing too muchdamage. But the one that followed reached 5.2 tobecome the worst earthquake to hit Spain in morethan 50 years.

As I walked the streets yesterday, hundreds ofContinued on page 2

Spain ‘united’ to help residents

Continued frompage 1

people passed me carry-ing suitcases and boxescontaining their worldlygoods. I stopped severaland asked them wherethey were going; themajority hadn’t a clue butwere just following thecrowds. Most had spentWednesday night sleep-ing outside for fear ofanother tremor and thecar parks of supermar-kets and local playingfields were already fullwith people camping onthe tarmac. Some hadhomes to return to, manydid not.

Spirit

At the entrance toLorca’s main street, andthe location of what wasthe epicentre of thequake, a lone policemangamely tried to direct

chaotic traffic. He sym-bolised the spirit of thetown as firemen andambulances, their sirensconstant in the back-ground, fought their wayin and out of the town.

The Red Cross hasmoved in 24 ambulancesand set up three fieldhospitals and as I depart-ed the army were movingin. Hundreds of militaryteams were beingdeployed to search therubble for victims andsurvivors, beginning theclean-up and checkingwhich buildings are safeto enter.

In addition, the RedCross used 350 ambu-lances to move patientsfrom two hospitals thathad to be closed down.

Lorca's Mayor,Francisco Jodar met withprime minister Zapateroand his interior ministeron Thursday lunchtime inthe centre of Lorca alongwith the president of the

Murcian region, RamónLuis Valcárcel Siso, toassess the damage andreassure residents thatthe whole country was‘united’ in helping the cit-izens of Lorca.

The scene in Lorca isone of utter devastationwith residents eitherhomeless or being toldthat they can’t return totheir homes for safetyreasons. The town’sparks and open spacesare filling with peoplewho have nowhere elseto go, or those who fearanother tremor.

Never have I seen aplace where everywhere Ilook there is somethingthat needs sorting outand quickly. The logis-tics of getting Lorcaback on its feet areincredible but the onething that has risen fromthe rubble is the unity ofa nation that so often isready to denounce itsneighbours.

Spain has hundreds ofearthquakes every year,though most of them aretoo small to be noticed.But Murcia is the coun-try's most seismicallyactive area and sufferedtremors in 2005 and 1999.

It is close to the largefault line beneath theMediterranean Sea wherethe European and Africancontinents meet.For more exclusiveimages of the devastationgo to www.thecourier.es

2 Friday, May 13, 2011

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MyraQuesada, Rojales,

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GuardamarTel. 638 741 847

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WritersDave Bull

Malcolm PalmerMick HardyDonna Gee

Suzanne MannersSpike

Paul PayneSally Bengtsson

Tony MayesJake Monroe

Dan SmithPhotographerMark Welton

The Courier, its publishers, members ofstaff and its agents do not acceptresponsibility for claims by advertisersnor can it be held responsible for anyerrors in advertisements which arereproduced from poor artwork, low qual-ity electronic data or inadequate instruc-tions for text or other layout features.Further no responsibility is accepted forany loss or damage caused by an error,inaccuracy or non-appearance of anyadvertisement, although all advertise-ments produced are checked prior toinsertion. We regret that we cannotaccept responsibility for more than ONEincorrect insertion and that no re-publi-cation will be granted in the case oftypographical or minor changes whichdo not affect the value of the advertise-ment. E&OE. NO PART OF THISNEWSPAPER MAY BE REPRODUCEDWITHOUT THE WRITTEN CONSENTOF THE PUBLISHERS.

Published byRainbow Media, S.L.

Printed by Localprint S.L

Depósito legalA - 132 - 2011

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Today Saturday Sunday

ThursdayWednesdayTuesdayMonday

Lorca's Mayor, Francisco

Jodar shows the strain,

and pictured the devasta-

tion following the 5.2

magnitude earthquake

on Wednesday evening.

By Dave BullAn advertising campaign offering the chance for mar-

ried women to sign on to a website so that they can findmen willing to have affairs has provoked a furious reac-tion in the Spanish capital Madrid…especially amongsttheir husbands.

Posters by the victoriamilan.es company on streetadvertising hoardings in Madrid invite women to"Relive your passion. Have an affair!" And are accom-panied by a photograph of a smiling woman with herarms around her illicit lover.The website claims it can find the desperate (or not so

desperate) woman both cyber-lovers and real onesfrom as far away as Scandinavia and includes testi-monies that it boasts are from contented clients. "I'vefound love and several men to enjoy spending timewith" stated Maria who says she is married and anoth-er who claimed her life ‘has improved enormously’since joining the website and saying to those whowould knock what they are up to, "You don't knowwhat you are missing until you try it."

However husbands were up in arms at the site withone telling the women who have signed up, "Youshould be ashamed of promoting infidelity, this sitemakes me sick. What kind of morality are you trying topromoteBut the website is obviously aiming at a different kind

of clientele and defended its actions in a statementsaying, "You only live once as they say, and we want tohelp you live it to the fullest by establishing this excit-ing friendly meeting place to privately spice up youreveryday life," it promises. The company claims tohave created the first dating website in Europe to tar-get people who are married or already in a relationship.

"We offer an atmosphere in which you can have fun,flirt, get to know someone and have an affair eitherclose to home or far away," claims the website, whichgives its address as a PO Box in Oslo, Norway.

3Friday, May 13, 2011

CARREFOUR WASH ‘CUSTOMER CARE’RIGHT OUT OF THEIR HAIR!

"Relive your passion. Have an affair!" Spanish website upsets husbands

Yet more reported problems for French conglomerateBy Spike

Following our exclusive story three weeks ago reportingon Cathy and Bob Ashe’s horrendous experience withthe uncaring supermarket giant we have been inundatedwith letters from readers who have all suffered someform of ‘snub’ from ‘uncaring’ Carrefour.One reader’s experience, Cheryl, was at the same store as

Cathy and Bob, here’s what she told us, ‘We don't live inSpain but we own an apartment which we use for holidaysfor family and friends each year but in the Autumn of lastyear my daughter and I went to Carrefour near theHabaneras centre looking for shampoo's. The floor in thatarea is laminate and as I walked down theaisle I slipped on what seemed to be aclear gel type liquid which must haveleaked from somewhere nearby. I slippedover and landed on my knee first andthen my wrist. I was in agony, not to men-tion feeling stupid, and my 15 year olddaughter tried to get help but none ofthe staff even looked our way.’By this time both mother and daughter

were getting rather distressed, andfrustrated, as even a Spanish womanfurther down the aisle completelyignored the struggling pair and whenthey tried to attract some help fromstaff within the store they werewaved off, or told that they wouldcome back but never did.Eventually Cheryl was left to hob-ble out of the store with the help ofher daughter. He knee by nowwas very swollen and Cheryl had to spendthe last day of her holiday not walking.

On return to the UK she went to her local hospital for an x-ray where the doctor told her that she had cracked her knee

cap and sprained her wrist. Cheryltold us she was home and treatedproperly but angry with Carrefour fortheir uncaring attitude, adding, ‘Theyare a total disgrace and I choose notto go in there now. In general I find theSpanish very rude as I do try to speak

their language when communicating and spend a lot of

money when we come over. Even though we’ve had abreak-in and another attempted break- in to our apartment.it's no wonder a lot of ex pats are trying to sell up and gohome, I'm very wary of all of them now in terms of attitudeand safety, I could have been having a heart attack butclearly would have been left to die!’

At the time of going to print we still have not received anyreply or comment from Carrefour.


SAYSBABY SELLERS

HAVE NO RIGHT TO BE PARENTS

THE couple selling their own baby on thestreets of Murcia makes you feel unwelldoesn’t it? Don’t begin by thinking thatthis couple were so desperate this was theonly option left open to them. It wasn’t. They had a roof over their heads where

their four other children lived and if theywe so desperate for their children to eat,why didn’t they put the baby into carerather than trying to grab a nice feweuros for their offspring?

And what now, if they are imprisonedwhat happens to the other four children(the baby has been taken into care)? Andif they let them off, then what? I’ll tellyou what; they’ll be at it like rabbits try-ing to produce another bundle of cashbecause they just lost the last one. Why don’t they make that the sentence –castration for them both? Either that or Ihope he becomes impotent…and soon.

THE EDITOR

ROJALES ROCKSHow the expats celebrated The idea was to have the biggest street party of all time, especially for those who remembered the greatstreet parties of the Silver Jubilee and the idea was to recreate the feel good factor of 1977. The idea was born on New Year's Day after a very bravegroup of people from The Pint Depot in the El Galan areadid Dip and Dive at La Zenia Beach.

Whilst talking to the Pink Ladies about their plannedcelebrations, there was the germ of an idea to have a cel-ebration in Quesada or Rojales.

After many discussions with many advisors it wasdecided to 'chance the weather' and have a big open airall day and night party in Rojales, to have the feel goodfactor of everyone celebrating together. Especially as a

lot of people would remember The Silver Jubilee - what Inow remember most is that it did not rain in 1977!!

Working in association with Rojales Town Hall and withthe backing of TKO everything was all set for a fantasticday! Best laid plans and all that! However, looking back on the enormous press coverage

in the Spanish Newspapers and on Spanish TV and thephotos lots of people were having a good time once thesun made an appearance and TKO who were fantastickeeping the whole thing rocking all day and into the night.

It’s May day in April!GEORGIE MAY has almost overnightbecome 'the face of Paul CunninghamNurses', we asked Georgie, why she chosethis charity.

"From the moment that I heard about thePaul Cunningham nurses charity I wasinstantly inspired; I was inspired by the storybehind the creation of the charity as well asthe amazing work that every individual doesbehind the scenes to raise funds for thecharity and make it a success.

The Royal Wedding Celebrations on the29th was an eventful day, the rain camedown but that did not stop us from celebrat-ing this memorable event together. Arrivingin a beautiful red, Ford Galaxy was anamazing experience, Emmanuel, the driverand owner of the car was a credit on theday, we have become good friends and weare both looking forward to working togetherin the future.

Being published by all Spanish press andbeing looked upon as the face of the charitywas a true honour. To be titled the face ofsuch an amazing charity, one that is veryclose to my heart and that does such anamazing job in the care and support theyoffer to terminally ill patients in their lastdays, I am, as I said, truly honoured. Oversuch a short amount of time I have beeninvolved so much with the charity, from cel-ebrating the royal wedding as mentioned, to15km walks, casino nights and even scubadiving, to name but a few!With regards to the scuba diving, I first met

Tony from Max Scuba Diving Centre at anevent in aid of the charity. Little did I knowthat on that day I would be getting into a wetsuit and scuba diving for the first time! Pulling in SusanReader in with me. Max Scuba Diving and I continue to worktogether with many projects in the pipe line. They have givenme a passion for scuba diving and I am now taking on thechallenge of an open water scuba diving course in aid of the

charity in the near future! They are also sponsoring my offi-cial 2012 charity calendar. Working with and supporting PaulCunningham Nurses is like a journey and along the way Ihave met the most amazing people, formed strong friend-ships and above all, raised funds for such a fantastic cause!"

I AM FRENCH, my wife isAmerican from Texas and 4years ago we arrived to livein Spain. In 1989, an oldfriend and I found this 1964Ford Galaxi 500 XL convert-ible by chance in the scrap-yard of the Canadian AirForce in Solingen Germany.It was the only convertiblecar in this yard, and we hadalready remodelled someAmerican cars but never hada convertible.This car was white, the soft

roof was gone, and the carwas half buried in mud, the

mud was all over the seatsbut never mind, we boughtthe car.

The next week we cameback with a truck we had ahard time to shovel and liftthe car out of the mud. Backto France and we first wepower washed it and thendisassembled it all ready toremodel. We both workedon the car every day afterour regular work, and it tookus 2 years to remodel itcompletely and only withoriginal parts. The engine isa V8 - 352 CI (5.8l) XLmeans extra luxury. So thecar is all electric, automaticgear-box, power windows,roof and seat. Power-brakes and power steeringtoo.

In august 2009 I broughtour car by road fromStrasbourg France. I drove3 days by the country roadsI had no problem at all to dothis 2500 km, but I used 9

tanks of fuel.Just six weeks ago I was

asked if Paul CunninghamNurses could use our car forsome publicity shots for aWedding Show at LaHerradura in LosMontesinos and then for TheRoyal Wedding Fiesta inRojales. I have to say I wasdelighted to have my carchosen by the bride above aRolls-Royce or a limo....Georgie May, who hasbecome the face of PaulCunningham Nurses is astunning and lovely girl.Georgie has become myMuse and has kindly agreedto be on our business-cards.(There is no easy translationfor Muse but Emmanuelexplains - I mean like a god-dess that inspires an artist)The car is available with the

driver in Texan’s clothes forany events; please [email protected] you would like details.


WITH ROYAL REVELRY!THE spectacular open-air event spanned fully13 hours - from 11am until midnight!In association with Rojales Town Hall, and withenormous support from TKO radio, it was amemorable day for The Courier - and for thelocal community. Once the sun came out, lotsof people had a really good time and TKO werefantastic in keeping the whole thing rocking allday and into the night!

JUST SPECTACULAR!

HOW MY CAR BECAME FAMOUS THE DAY WILLS AND KATE GOT MARRIED

Britain’s special day with William and Kate

Prices for UKPounds Stirling

Average House Price£24,188Gallon of Petrol £1.32 Yearly Inflation Rate UK11.9% Interest Rates Year EndBank of England 14.38%

Popular Culture

• MTV (Music Television) islaunched August 1st • Simon And GarfunkelReunite for concert in NewYorks Central Park

Popular Films

• Raiders of the Lost Ark • Superman II • Nine to Five • Any Which Way You Can • Arthur • The Cannonball Run • For Your Eyes Only • On Golden Pond • Chariots of Fire

PopularMusicians

• John Lennon • Blondie • Dolly Parton “9 to 5” • Sheena Easton • Diana Ross and LionelRichie with “Endless Love” • Olivia Newton-John with“Physical” • Roxy Music

• Bucks Fizz • Adam and the Ants • Michael Jackson • Queen • David Bowie

Technology

• Scientists identify The AidsVirus• First Flight of US SpaceShuttle Columbia• The European Rocket"Arianne" is launched• IBM in US launches its firstPC which uses MicrosoftSoftware MS DOS • The term INTERNET firstmentioned • Post It Notes launched by3M Corp • The World’s Fastest Trainthe French TGV goes intoservice between Paris andLyons

• China Clones the first fish(Golden Carp) • Artificially Produced Insulinbecomes the world’s firstgenetically engineered pro-tein to treat human diseaseDiabetes • MS-DOS released byMicrosoft

What EventsHappened in

1981?Iran • Iran releases 52 Americanhostages, who had beenheld for 444 daysPoland • Solidarity inspired popularprotests and general strikelead to imposition of MartialLaw and eventual outlawingof solidarity party in Poland

UK • Thatcher Government inEngland begin privatisationof Nationalised Industriescreating economic revival,this format is later emulatedin many other countriesthroughout the world U.S. • Air traffic controllers strikecausing chaos in the US andthe US President RonaldReagan Fires Them Northern Ireland • Irish Republican Armymember Bobby Sands dieson May 5th while on thehunger strike, during thattime Bobby Sands is electedto Westminster as the MPfor Fermanagh and SouthTyrone. U.S. • Ronald Reagan becomesUS President

France • The first high speed trainservice in Europe beginswith the French TGV /high-speed train betweenParis and Lyon UK • Following plans betweenEuropean Countries andthe US to base NuclearMissiles in Europe protest-ers including those atGreenham Common pick-et US bases U.S. • Anti-nuclear protestersinvade the Diablo CanyonNuclear Reactor inCalifornia U.S. • Researchers find thewreck of the Titanic in theNorth Atlantic U.S. • Muhammad Ali finallyretires with career recordof 55 wins and 5 defeats U.S. • US brings in new disabil-ity eligibility rules for thoseclaiming disability affecting500,000 who lose benefits UK • Rupert Murdoch shutsdown the Sunday Timesdue to an industrial dispute U.S. • Washington Post reporterJanet Cooke admits herfeature was fabricated andrelinquished the PulitzerPrizeU.S. • The U.S. Supreme Courtruled that states couldrequire parental notifica-tion when teenage girlsseek abortions. UK • Peter Sutcliffe, theYorkshire Ripper is caught,and imprisoned for life for13 counts of murder Greece • Earthquake hits Athens,killing 16 people

Vatican • Pope John Paul II, is shotbut not killed in Vatican City UK • Lady Diana Spencer mar-ries Charles, Prince ofWales. Egypt • Egyptian president AnwarSadat is assassinated U.S. • Sandra Day O'Connor isnominated to become thefirst female justice on theU.S. Supreme Court. U.S. • The first American test-tube baby, is bornUK • Riots break out in a num-ber of UK Cities includingBrixton (London), Toxteth(Liverpool), and Moss Side(Manchester) U.S. • The introduction of the firstFrequent Flyer MilesAdvantage introduced byAmerican Airlines (frequentflyer miles can be redeemedfor free air travel) UK • Four senior Labour MP'Sannounce they will breakaway from Labour Party andset up the SocialDemocratic Party SDPunder the leadership of RoyJenkins Syria • 147 passengers and crewof a Pakistan Airways aretaken hostage and releasedin Syria Bangladesh • Attempted coup inBangladesh and thePresident Ziaur Rahman ismurdered Antigua • Antigua and BarbudaGains Independence fromGreat Britain UK • The First London Marathonis run in England


THE GOOD OLD DAYS

1981Many notable technological advances happened in1981 one of the most exciting was the First Flight ofthe Space Shuttle Columbia. This was also the firstyear that the Word Internet was mentioned and MS-DOS was released by Microsoft along with the firstIBM PC. On the world stage the events that capturedthe imagination included Lady Diana Spencer marry-ing Charles, The Prince of Wales. In Politics a littleknown group before Solidarity inspire popularprotests and a general strike in Poland and the gov-ernment in the UK starts the process of privatizationof Nationalized Industries which is later followed bymany other countries around the world.


CAM BANKS ONLYINTEREST IS ‘INTEREST’

I know Tony Mayes is going to have a goabout banks in his column next week,and I know from talking to readers thatmany have had an ‘interesting’ or frus-trating experience in a Spanish bank. SoI thought I’d chuck my two-penneth worthin too.

Do you need some time on your own?Need to be undisturbed for hours on end andjust left to your own thoughts? We all dodon’t we? I know I certainly do and I’ve foundthe perfect place to do it…my local branch ofCAM bank. There I can guarantee that, whilethere are others around me, in my (or any?)branch of CAM and I stand and think (alsoknown as queuing) for hours on end withoutthe distraction of a bank clerk calling myname. and even if I should reach the front ofthe queue before winter I am safe in theknowledge that once I reach her desk she’llpick up the phone and deal with Mr ‘Lucky’

(or MR Smart…?) on the other end leavingme a good ten more minutes to, er, think.

If it comes across that I don’t like the CAMbank then that’d be about right. The bankthat likes to say ‘commission’ has not doneme any favours over the years, one or two Icant even write about but it sums it up reallywhen I tell you that I even put in a complaintform at my local branch but I guess I’m beinga little optimistic in expecting a swift reply,after all it was only two months ago…I asked for an appointment with the manag-er, they said she’d call, she didn’t. I phonedtheir central office and said I wanted to com-plain about my branch. They told me I had toask THE branch for a complaint for and handit back in…to the branch that I’m complain-ing about.

I wonder how long it was before my letterhit the bottom of the bin? However, knowingthe CAM they’ll charge me a commission forreading it…

I must have a guilty faceReading (and writing) the story of the

couple terrorised by the car-jackers nearMadrid made me think of something.These guys have been at it now (robbingforeigners) for a couple of months or soand they haven’t been caught. TheGuardia haven’t even got a sniff of them.And, they’ve car-jacked or attempted torob foreigners in their cars some 90times! And the police miss them everysingle time.

Now, I can bet you next months salary(trust me, don’t get excited…) that if I goalong the motorway, in a Spanish regis-tered car by the way, keeping within thespeed limits and driving safely and con-siderately – some git in a police car willstop me. Ok, so ‘git’ is probably a littleunfair but he (invariably it’s a ‘he’) willthen proceed to go through my paper-

work as if I was an Arab trying to get apart-time job in the US senate.

The fact that my NIE has my very firstaddress in Spain on it is ‘wrong’ andwhen I point out that most of the popula-tion have the same problem – he tells me(accurately as it happens) that he hasn’tstopped most of the population, just me.Ok, fair enough, go about your duty guysbut just one thing? How is it that ‘threeforeign looking gentlemen’ can cruise thehighways surrounding Madrid in a nickedMercedes, carrying guns and lookingshifty (well they do don’t they…) while Iget pulled over more often than aMoroccan in a white van.Having said all that I’m due to spend the

night out with a pair of officers from theGuardia Civil this month, so I’ll ask…ormaybe not…

Morons are rubbishI’ve written about this before and, mainly

because of two reasons I’m gonna do itagain. Litter. Or more specifically litterthrown from cars. If you do it, then you area moron. Pure and simple. Sorry but whycant people take it home with them andwhy, and how do they justify chucking aMcDonalds carton out of

the window – when I’m on my motorbikebehind!

There’s one particular guy in my townthat drives a pick up truck and throws hisempty cigarette packets onto the street ashe drives. He did it in front of me once andI stopped and picked it up. When hestopped at the next junction I pulled along-side and dropped the fag packet into the

back of his truck. He went mental.Jumping out of the truck he raced

over and started calling me‘hijo de puta’ which I trans-

lated to ‘hi, I’m a moron’.He was livid and it didn’t

take long for the com-motion (his car wasalso blocking theroad) to attract theattention of the boysin blue, the locals. Great, someonewith some sense tosort it out I’dthought. Ten minutes later I’d

been cautioned foradmitting to throwing

the litter into his truckand severely warned not

to do it again. The other guydrove off with no problems…

the reason said the officer – ‘youadmitted it….’

RETURN-A-BULLS

Just a quick note to let you know thatthe Bull Ring are back at the BSAschool in Alicante this week and wecant wait to see what ideas the kidshave come up with. Having spoken tohead of business studies, JohnThomas I know that the lads and lasseshave been busy coming up with someinteresting ideas.The team will be at the school from

3pm on Tuesday to listen as the kidspresent their ideas to the Bulls in frontof an audience. Those whose ideasappeal to the ‘Bulls’ will be rewardedwith the help and advice that the youngentrepreneurs may need to get theiridea off the ground.We’ll have a full report in next weeksCourier…unless they’ve tired me outby then.



It’s turning out not nice againAs the North Pole melts the famous enjoy an ice

and a slice and a nice clean gagging orderTony Mayes asks why a blanket of ice is dis-appearing and how ‘celebrities’ can hidebeneath a gagging order.

Do you think that all the talk over recent yearsabout global warming is just a load of scare tacticsto try to con more out of us through green taxes, ordo you believe there's a real threat?

Personally, I believe that global warming and itseffects represent just as great a threat to mankindas the proliferation of nuclear weapons back in the'60s and '70s. And the latest bit of data from scien-tists I find the most worrying yet.

They have been watching the loss of ice fromGreenland and Antarctica and have discovered thatover the past 20 years ice has been disappearingat an ever increasing rate.

The two ice sheets are now losing enough ice tobe able to raise sea levels by 1.3mm each year.Add to that ice melt from mountains and glaciersaround the world and the natural effect of theexpansion of water as it warms, and the overalleffect will be to raise sea levels by a foot within 40 years. Bythe end of the century sea levels would be 22ins higher.That's sufficient to swamp many low lying areas around the

world, and unfortunately many of these places have veryhigh populations. It puts at risk low lying parts of Torreviejaand the seafront towns and urbanisations around the MarMenor, for example.

But global warming does not end with just sea level rise. Itbrings about huge changes in weather patterns and makesour weather far more extreme. The recent storms across themid-west of America, the most violent in living memoryresulting in the loss of at least 250 lives, is yet another wakeup call, that is if we really need yet another.

OK, the sceptics among us will say we have always hadsevere weather events and the planet will compensate forthe effects of increased pollution and high greenhousegasses.

I would suggest that these people trying to dismiss theeffects of global warming are those with a vested interest inpreserving the status quo - for example those making a for-tune out of the oil industry and continued manufacture ofvehicles driven by fossil fuels. It was exactly the same denialwhich for years hushed up the scientific studies whichshowed the direct link between smoking and lung cancer.

So, next time you hear a global warming warning, don'tbury your head in the sand - in a few years’ time that sandmight be under the sea.

GAGGING TO HIDE THINGS

If there's one thing I hate it's the "great andthe good" looking after themselves at theexpense of the rest of us. Latest example isthe legal profession and judges building upcase law to create super injunctions to preventthe publication of the wrong-doings of the richand famous.Don't get me wrong, I hate those publications

whose continued existence is based onpathetic tittle-tattle. But I hate more, the abilityof people in the public eye - footballers, politi-cians, actors, TV personalities and many oth-ers with clout to be able to rush to a court andget a gagging order to hush up their horriblewrong-doings.

I'm glad that at long last BBC journalistAndrew Marr confessed that he was one ofthose who obtained a super injunction to pre-vent the disclosure that he had had an affair.He was a total hypocrite as a journalist inter-viewing others about wrong-doings and gag-

ging the Press about his own indiscretion.Equally the BBC must have been aware and yet continued

to employ him in his 600,000 pound a year job.The problem is that judges are often only too willing to push

the boundaries in gagging the press because who knows,they might be next in wanting to suppress some murkywrong-doing in their own lives.

So let's get sensible legislation that establishes properboundaries over what is an intrusion in private life and whatis in the public interest. A person who has got rich andfamous by performing in public and becomes a person whosociety looks up to, should not be able to use the law to gagthe press if he or she falls from grace.

10 Friday, May 13, 2011


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only made to measure butpriced accordingly. All the tim-ber we use is specially treatedand coloured for all differentconditions on the CostaBlanca e.g. sun for pergolasand decking. Our decking isalso covered against chlorineand colour depreciation.

For a free no obligation quo-tation and site visit please donot hesitate to contact us dur-ing office hours and we canassist you with any informa-tion you require and give youa competitive price for yourpergola, decking, summer-house or shed.

For further informationplease contact us between9.00 am – 5.00 pm Monday-Saturday on:Tel: 610 180 040693 039 794 (Espanol)www.sanpedropergolas.esE-mail: [email protected]

San Pedro Pergolas

12 Friday, May 13, 2011

SMUGGLERS MAKE A HASH OF IT

By Spike

A LORRY intercepted by Spanish policetravelling along the A-7 in Benidorm wasfound to be carrying a ton of hashish. The38 tonne truck had a lookout van drivingsome distance ahead to keep an eye outfor police but the authorities got suspiciousand following a check on vehicle registra-tions, they decided to pull the truck over.

The journey is believed to have begun inAlmería with the vehicles steadily makingtheir way up the coast to Barcelona whichwas the final destination for the truck full ofdrugs. Police believe the haul they recov-ered last week is just part of a major drugsmuggling operation by gangs in theCatalan capital. They have evidence thatthe gang was based in Terrassa,Barcelona, and carried out drug traffickingon a grand scale but now are on the run.

The investigation is being run in partner-ship with several other authorities includ-ing the participation of the GRECO agentsfrom the Levante, plus Judicial Police fromAlicante and Barcelona, and CrimePrevention and Reaction unit fromAlicante. The police made two arrestswhich were the drivers of two vehicles.

This incident shows the increased drugtrafficking that Spanish authorities are nowfighting; just a few days before a gang of18 people were arrested after two tons of

drugs were recovered in two separatepolice operations in Dénia. The local judgeeven decided in this case, due to theamount of drugs involved, to send seven ofthose arrested directly to jail on remand.

The operation to capture the smugglerswas led by the EDOA anti-drug and organ-ised crime team from Alicante alongsidethe Calpe judicial police.

The 16 arrested are Spanish; most ofthem have previous police records, andwere detained in Dénia and Ondara in thenorth of the Alicante province. Otherarrests were made following information inBarcelona and Girona.

It is suspected that the gang operatedalong the Mediterranean coast and hiredluxury yachts to travel to Morocco to col-lect the drugs.

The other operation, which was imple-mented by the National Police UDCO unitfrom Alicante, a further two people werearrested at motorway toll booths on theAP-7 near Dénia. They were arrested onsuspicion of transporting 10,000 kilos ofdrugs every month from Almería up anddown the coast. Both were detained pend-ing further investigation by the judge lastweek.

One of the men, a 55 year old Spaniard,is alleged to have transported cocaine hid-den in wooden planks while his co-conspir-ator acted as a look out.

BABY FOR SALE ON MURCIA’S STREETS

Desperate couple try and sell their fifth childTOURISTS and locals were shocked lastweek when a couple were seenapproaching people in the streets ofMurcia and offering ‘their’ baby for salefor just 5000€. They were arrested afterconcerned observers called the policeand reported the strange behaviour.

In a statement police said the couple,who have not been named, were report-ed to have approached at least four dif-ferent women during the day on thestreets of Alcantarilla, which is near thecoast of Murcia, offering to sell theirfive-month old daughter for the sum5,000€.

However, having been turned downevery time the persistent, and desperate,

left their mobile phone number withsome women just in case they changedtheir minds. Obviously not the sharpestpencils in the bag the two were immedi-ately traced by police.

At first nobody could believe that thechild did in fact belong to the couple andPolice said they at first suspected thechild may not have belonged to the pairbut they later confirmed by showingpaperwork that in fact they were tryingto sells their own daughter.

The couple have four older children allliving with them at their home inAlcantarilla but this baby has been takenaway from them and has now beenplaced in care.

BUMPER EASTER EGGS ONTOURIST INDUSTRY

By Spike

AN unexpected bumper Easter came tothe Costas last month with 34 per cent ofthe tourists visiting Alicante at Easter com-ing from the U.K., according to info fromthe Patronato Municipal de Turismo whichwas released last week.

25% of visitors to Alicante over the holi-days were from the Madrid region andmost visitors to the tourist office innAlicante wanted more information on fies-tas, leisure options, cultural activities, localcuisine and the local transport network.

In a statement, Councillor for Tourism,Marta García-Romeu, said that the townsand cities of the region had seen theirstreets and squares full of tourists who hadcome to enjoy the regions many proces-sions and the variety of attractions on offer

during Easter. Despite the bad weatherexperienced on some days.

This comes on top of the news that thenumber of flight seats booked for this sum-mer in Spain has seen an increase of7.4per cent compared to this time lastyear.

And according to the Ministry forDevelopment, over 40 million travellersused Spanish airports during the first quar-ter of the year signalling an increase whichis so important to the region as tourism willbe the mainstay of recovery in the num-bers of air traveller for Spain.

At Barcelona’s El Prat airport the numberof travellers rose by 15.5% to 6.6 million inthe first quarter, compared to last year andinterestingly the first quarter also saw a3.9% increase in the number of peopletravelling by train in Spain.


THEY were dancing inthe aisles at TheMunicipal Theatre inTorrevieja on Saturdaynight! This was abrand new venue forHeatwave Promotionsand something of anunknown quantity butthere was no need toworry; the wholeevening was a com-plete triumph.

HeatwavePromotions had flowna top Blues BrothersTribute Show in fromthe UK to support theheadline act fromIreland, DaveF i n n e g a n ' sCommitments. The highlyexpectant audience werenot disappointed and wereup on their feet dancingwithin the first few numbers.Ever keen to provide thebest value for money thatthey possibly can, HeatwavePromotions had engagedthis fantastic tribute to TheBlues Brothers for a onehour set and it flew by asthey treated the audience toone hit after another.

There was barely time toget your breath back beforeDave Finnegan and hissuperb 8 piece band took to

the stage. Finnegan playeddrummer Mickah Wallace inthe 1991 classic movie, TheCommitments and it wasclear from the reception thathe received that the majorityof the audience were bigfans of the movie, the manand the music. The set ranalmost two hours and includ-ed every one of the tracksfrom one of the most famousmovie soundtracks in histo-ry.

The sound quality in thissuperb venue was spot onand two minor hitches withthe equipment were swiftlyand expertly resolved,

detracting not at all from theenjoyment of the fans.It wasgood to see such a cosmo-politan audience too. Thiswas thanks in part to the uni-versal appeal of both actsand also to the involvementof the Torrevieja Town Hallwith the advertising and pro-motion of the event.

The next HeatwavePromotion presentation isThe Temptations on 10thJune, again at the MunicipalTheatre. This concert wasoriginally due to take placein December 2010 at TheOrihuela Costa Resort butwas unfortunately post-

poned due to thesnow which broughthalf of Europe to astandstill at thattime. The venue hasbeen changed to alarger one in order toaccommodate thoseconcert goers whowere unable to get aticket to last year'ssold out event. Allticket holders fromthe postponed con-cert have been allo-cated new ticketsand these can becollected from theoffices of SunworldReal Estate in LosDolses from today

onwards. Previous ticketholders need to take theiroriginal tickets along toSunworld in order to receivetheir new tickets.

There are a limited amountof tickets left for TheTemptations and after see-ing the show on Saturdaynight, it is guaranteed thatthere will be a rush for thisshow too. Visit www.heat-wavepromotions.com fordetails of how and where toget your tickets. Oh yes, anddust off your dancing shoestoo – you're going to needthem!

The Commitments Rock the House PEELING ONIONSMAKES YOU CRY

Especially when the woman doing it stabs you!By Spike

HAVING stabbed a man just a few moments before amiddle aged woman asked police for her knife back asshe wanted ‘to peel some onions’, and while the emer-gency services were trying to carry out their work, thewoman came down to the doorway where they weretreating the injured man and calmly made her request.Witnesses told us that they thought she was ‘probablydrunk’ as police stormed the building and arrested herbefore taking her away for questioning in Alicante. Thewoman claimed innocence stating that the victim hadsomehow decided to stab himself, but a spokesman forthe police said he thought that was ‘unlikely.’The victim was attended to by a mobile SAMU unit in thedoorway of the block flats where he lived and where thestabbing happened in Calle Berenguer de Marquinaaround midday and after arresting the woman theNational Police from Alicante said that they believe thatthe woman stabbed the 41 year old man from EasternEurope over a debt of 500€.

Exercise goes down a bomb!A French minesweeper, the Orion, which was happily takingpart in naval exercises off the coast of Alicante, has recov-ered an old sea mine in waters off the Isla de Tabarca. Found by on April 29, the French ship had been taking partin the ‘Spanish Minex-11’ manoeuvres, which is a multina-tional exercise for training in mine warfare that takes placeannually. The event is cooperation between naval fleets fromSpain, Portugal, Poland, Germany and France who are allinvolved in tracking and making safe fake mines which inreality could have been planted by terrorists to disrupt mar-itime traffic. Although this time the naval fleets got a bit of a shock whenthe real thing was found, it was made safe and identified asItalian…so it probably wasn’t reliable anyway…

14 Friday, May 13, 2011


ROGUETRADERS

DON’T GET RIPPED OFF – FOLLOW OUR USEFULGUIDE TO SPOTTING THE GOOD, THE BAD AND

THE UGLY OF THE TRADES OUT THEREHad so many letters about this wethought it was time to help our readerswith The Courier guide to spottingcowboy traders

Spotting a Rogue Trader

Traders such as these will often use arange of techniques to encourage you tohand over your cash there and then.

So - beware of people who say thingslike: • "Congratulations! You've won a prizewhich means you can get a special dis-count for replacing and repairing roof tiles.Just sign here to claim…" • "I was just passing and noticed your gut-ter is starting to come away…" • "I don't mean to worry you, but therehave been a lot of burglaries in the arearecently" • "This offer is only available today. If youdon't sign up to this now the price will be50% higher come tomorrow." • "If you pay cash right now I can give youa special discount..."

Of course, we all need home improve-ment work on occasions. But you can pro-tect yourself from rogue traders by askingthese questions: • How long has your company been inbusiness? • Do you have a trade premises I canvisit? • Are you a member of a TradeAssociation? • Can I see some references for similarwork you've done in the past and can Ispeak to the people for whom the workhas been done? • Have you got insurance to cover againstany damage to my or my neighbour'sproperty? • Is all your work guaranteed and will thisbe insurance backed*?

(* An insurance backed guaranteemeans that an insurer will make certainany guarantee work is performed even ifthe business with which you contractedhas ceased trading)

You can never presume that a trades-man will answer such questions correctlyand honestly – but any who stumble overtheir answers or are uncomfortable orunconvincing are best avoided. Better stillcall the Fair Trading Service, who canhelp you check whether what you havebeen told is correct or not.

Choosing a Good Trader

Don't just think about questions to ask atradesman – there are questions youshould really ask yourself before agreeingto any work: For example: • Can I afford this work? • Do I normally pay large sums of moneyto firms I know nothing about? • Do I need to have this work done straightaway? • Will this work be good value? • Would I have got this work done even ifa doorstep trader had not called? • Do I know how to contact the seller ifthings go wrong? • What happens if I change my mind? • Is this offer too good to be true?

If, after all of this, you still decide to goahead and get work done, it is recom-mended that you get at least 3 quotes.Make sure that you clearly specify whatneeds to be done, and that all parts of thejob you require are outlined in a writtenquotation.

When you come to consider the threequotes, remember to take into account notjust the price, but issues such as the trad-er's reputation and status within the indus-try.

Choosing a Rogue Trader

If you have not followed the above adviceand find that you have agreed to somework that you did not want or cannotafford, then remember - you may still beable to get out of the contract. And remember: Never sign something towaive you right to cancel.

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We are based in Jacarilla and on theOrihuela Costa, operating throughoutthe Costa Blanca and Costa Calidaregions. See our catalogue online atwww.EmbroideryWorkshop.net or emailus at [email protected] ortelephone us on 966 770 964.

By Dave BullSPAIN’S housing minister Jose Blancoopened the Spanish Property Roadshowwith a pledge of ‘trust us’ as he was trying toencourage British buyers back by promisingthat their investments will be safe.

The show which is on in London is part ofthe effort to show that Spain has changed itsspots with Blanco claiming that now was anideal time to buy in Spain due to low pricesand new legislation to protect investors.

He went on to say that a new 'solid frame-work' guaranteed that 'it is safe to buy ahouse in Spain' and his promise comesdespite the on-going saga in Spain whichhas seen some British homeowners evictedfrom their homes and, in some cases, hav-ing their properties bulldozed.Another problem to hit Spain has been that

many foreign buyers have been affected bylax legislation which allowed properties tobe built on rural land, only to be declaredillegal once completed and it includes asmany as 300,000 supposedly illegal proper-ties in the Andalucía region, of southernSpain, alone.Other problems have included several ruralbanks collapsing after taking on too manyrisky mortgages and construction compa-nies going bust after accepting depositsfrom buyers many of whom were expats.

But, Mr Blanco insisted that of the 850,000Britons currently living in Spain, it is onlyone per cent that was affected by the scan-dal. And went on to promise that new legis-lation had increased transparency in themarket and he unveiled plans for an onlineregistry which allows British buyers to checkif there are outstanding debts or other mat-ters relating to a property before buying.

In the last two years property prices inSpain have dropped by around 24 per centalthough in the south that has been as muchas a 40 per cent per cent drop but Blancoinsisted that the Spanish economy is show-ing the green shoots of recovery.

The resale market is doing very well withmany people taking advantage of bargainsthat are plentiful at the moment.

WHAT THE SPAN16 Friday, May 13, 2011

SPAIN GETS A MAKEOVERBetter legislation for foreign house-buyers Zapatero admits he’d rather have

seen Al-Qaeda leader in courtBy Spike

JOSE LUIS ZAPATERO, Spain’s PrimeMinister became one of the first westernleaders to admit that he would have pre-ferred to have seen bin Laden go on trialsaying, "Any democrat would have pre-ferred to see him stand trial,"

However, he refused to criticise thekilling of the world's most wanted man inthe raid by US Special Forces last weeksaying that bin Laden had "sought hisown destiny."

But extremist Gaspar Llamazares,deputy of left wing party Izquierda Unida(IU), said the killing of bin Laden's was"extra-judicial murder" and an act of"state terrorism" and asked why theSpanish leader was so enthusiastic abouthis death following Zapatero’s congratu-latory message to US President BarackObama.

At a press conference last weekZapatero said, "It's likely that bin Ladensought his own destiny, the blood on binLaden's hands sealed his own fate."Going on to add that he would haverather seen the man brought to justice hesaid, "any democrat would have pre-ferred bin Laden stood trial, but that Iunderstand why it happened in the way itdid for one of history's bloodiest crimi-nals."

In a telegram sent Monday to the USpresident, Mr Zapatero wrote: "I wouldlike to express to you, on behalf of myGovernment and Spanish society, thesatisfaction shared with the American

people over the result of the anti-terror-ism operation which has led to the deathof Bin Laden.

In 2004 Madrid was the site of the worstterrorist attack in Europe carried out inthe name of al Qaeda when Islamist mili-tants detonated bombs in four packedcommuter trains at the same time killing191 people and wounding more than2,000. In a statement afterwards terroristsclaimed that the attacks were inspiredbut not ordered by al Qaeda.

Leftist, Llamazares had asked for anapology from the FBI in January 2010after they used his image from an oldcampaign poster to create a mock-up ofhow bin Laden might have looked digital-ly enhancing the image using Llamazaresforehead, hair and jawline and cut-and-pasting bin Laden's features on it toshow how he might look.

BETTER IF HE’D GONE TO TRIAL

Gaspar Llamazares

Jose Blanco

NISH PAPERS SAY17Friday, May 13, 2011

CHE’S MOTORBIKE PARTNER DIESAGED 88

ACCORDING to the a report conducted byNatWest Nine out of 10 Britons livingabroad say they have a much better qualityof life than they would enjoy in the UK. Also,those who work reportedly earn up to20,000€ more and the vast majority (87 percent) believe their work-life balance is bet-ter than it would be in the UK.It goes to show that far from an ‘exodus’ of

expats from Spain most are very happilystaying here and even more said livingabroad exceeded their expectations - 92per cent compared with 86 per cent in2008,.Another change in recent times is that nowjust one in five now say they will return tothe UK compared to 26 per cent in 2008.Dave Isley, head of NatWest's InternationalPersonal Banking division, said: ''It seemsthe grass really is greener for Brits livingabroad as our study shows.''The fact that fewer expats say they willreturn to the UK in the future, compared tothree years ago, proves that the pace of life,work-life balance and earning potentialabroad means life as an expat is sunnier in

more ways than one - and that they areweathering the financial storm.''A majority of 53 per cent of Spanish expatsare still confident they will be better offfinancially in five years' time, but life abroadis not only about money apparently- thehighest reported earning countries(Singapore, UAE, China and Hong Kong)ranked bottom of the quality index, with themajority of expats in these areas planningto return home in the future (62, 67, 84 and69 per cent respectively) while us lot arequite content to put up with the sun andsangria here, well most of us. The survey was carried out by the Centrefor Future Studies for NatWest IPB.1,306 expats living in Australia, Canada,China, France, Hong Kong, New Zealand,Portugal, South Africa, Singapore, Spain,UAE and USA were surveyed betweenOctober and November 2009.They rated natural environment top, fol-

lowed by climate, culture and leisure, healthcare, education, financial security, safetyand security, financial well-being and infra-structure.

SCOTS VICTIM OF FRANCODEMANDS JUSTICE

Stuart Christie was on a mission toassassinate General Franco when he wasarrested in Madrid in 1964.

A Scottish anarchist, Stuart Christie, 65was caught in 1964 with plastic explo-sives after collecting them from fellowanarchists in Paris and then he crossedthe Spanish border with them hidden onhis body, has accused the Spanish gov-ernment of ignoring his attempts to berecognised as a Francoist victim.

Christie spent time in General Franco'sjails following the smuggling of explo-sives which were to be used to assassi-nate the dictator and in his book he says,‘with the plastic explosive strapped tome, my body was improbably misshapen.The only way to disguise myself was withthe baggy woollen jumper my granny hadknitted to protect me from the bitingClydeside winds. At the risk of under-statement, I looked out of place on theMediterranean coast in August.’

Christie spent three years in prisonbefore the Franco regime answered themany protests in Britain and releasedhim.

However, Spain’s historical memory lawstates that Francoist sentences cannotbe overturned but his lawyer ServandoRocha demanded that he be offeredrecognition for having suffered at thehands of Franco’s illegitimate court. He went on to accuse the government of

stalling the process of recognisingChristie’s case and giving him with whatis known as a "certificate of personalrecognition and reparation".The certificates, are designed to avoid

giving claimants such as Christie anyreason to demand compensation fromthe Spanish state over matters thatoccurred inn Spain's complicated past.But Spain's justice ministry has not yetmanaged to produce a certificate eventhough it has already admitted that it hashad all the necessary paperwork fromChristie for two years. Christie has askedthat the 20-year prison sentence, given tohim when he was an 18-year-old by aFrancoist council of war in 1964, to beoverturned. He said in an appeal to thegovernment, "I hope you can explain tome, once and for all, the real reason whymy application, submitted on 22 June2009, still remains unresolved,"

His solicitor, referring to elections dueby next March, added, ‘They will have togive it to him in the end, but they arestretching time out as long as possible,perhaps because they want the next gov-ernment to deal with it,"

Expats: ‘quality of life better here than UK’

Stuart Christie fought against Francoand was sentenced to 20 years

18 Friday, May 13, 2011

MAR AZUL SPORTS DAY

Mar Azul International School held theirannual Sports Day on the 12 th of April atTorrevieja Sports Centre. The wholeschool took part in this fantastic event.Rachel head of Mar Azul School told us ”I was overwhelmed with the support fromthe parents and pupils on the day, all ofthe staff put in a lot of effort to ensurethat the sports day was fun for everyone.The school really pulled together to pro-vide a fantastic day of sporting achieve-ment, well done”Geraldine Finnegan four times WorldChampion Heptathlete presented the chil-dren of Mar Azul International Schoolwith their wining medals which werekindly donated by Junior StrikersFootball School. Geraldine is now work-

ing with the school’s Sports Academy tohelp grow and develop their sportingstars of tomorrow. Rachel told us” Geraldine is absolutelybrilliant, she is having such a positiveeffect on the children of the sports acad-emy, she is a real inspiration for all chil-dren at the school” Rachel would like tothank Geraldine for all her hard work.

To view all pictures of the sports dayplease visitmarazulinternationalschool.com if yourequire information about Mar AzulInternational School and their forthcom-ing Holiday Club please contact theschool on 965 720785 or [email protected]

Sports Day Results:100m Sprint - Girls - Cortni Serwotka100m Sprint - Boys - James Brown 100m Sprint - Girls - Paige Dawson 100m Sprint - Boys - Shane Townsend 100m Sprint - Girls - Hannah Cox 100m Sprint - Boys - Daniel Izaguirre 100m Sprint - Girls - Dominique Turner100m Sprint - Boys - Harry Smith100m Sprint - Girls - Maisy Brown200m Sprint - Boys - Victor Brooks200m Sprint - Girls - Kirsty Ferries200m Sprint - Boys - Callum Johnson200m Sprint - Girls - Paige Pickford200m Sprint - Boys - Aiden Lech200m Sprint - Boys - James WilsonPestell200m Sprint - Girls - Cortni Serwotka

200m Sprint - Boys - Joshua Charles200m Sprint - Girls - Maisy Brown400m - Boys - James Brown400m - Girls - Nadya Cheetham400m - Boys - Liam Johnson400m - Girls - Jodi Watts800m - Boys - Akash PanchalChampionship Races 50m Primary Girls - Maisy Brown50m Primary Boys - Ludvik Sandstrom100mSecondary Girls Yr 7&8- Nadya Cheetham100mSecondary Boys Yr 7&8 - James Brown100mSecondary Boys Yr 9,10&11- India Pirie100mSecondary Girls Yr 9,10&11-Shane Town


KIDDIES CORNER

Kids News

ExperiMENTAL!!!Welcome to: THE COURIER LABORATORY

Make an Egg Float in Salt Water An egg sinks to the bottom if you dropit into a glass of ordinary drinkingwater but what happens if you addsalt? The results are very interestingand can teach you some fun factsabout density.

What you'll need:•One egg•Water•Salt•A tall drinking glass

Instructions:1.Pour water into the glass until it isabout half full.2.Stir in lots of salt (about 6 table-spoons).3.Carefully pour in plain water untilthe glass is nearly full (be careful tonot disturb or mix the salty water withthe plain water).4.Gently lower the egg into the waterand watch what happens.

What's happening?Salt water is denser than ordinary tapwater, the denser the liquid the easier

it is for an object to float in it.When you lower the egg into

the liquid it drops throughthe normal tap water

until it reaches thesalty water, at thispoint the water isdense enough for theegg to float. If youwere careful when

you added the tapwater to the salt water,

they will not have mixed,enabling the egg to amazingly

float in the middle of the glass.

SPOT THE DIFFERENCE AND WIN!Take a look at eachof the pair of pic-tures. The photobelow haschanged. Items inthe photographmay have grownbigger, smaller,shorter, taller, thin-ner, thicker andeven curlier! Someobjects maychange colour,rotate, or even flipupside down.Sometimes, brandnew objects orpeople have creptonto the scene.Once you've foundall of the changes,drop them in toone of our outletsand the first threewill win a prize!

Scenes From a RoyalWedding

Prince William and Kate Middletonmarry at Westminster Abbey inLondon, EnglandLove is in the air! Hundreds of thou-sands of fans lined the streets ofLondon and millions worldwidewatched on television as Britain'sPrince William married KateMiddleton in London's grandestchurch, Westminster Abbey. Prince William is second in line toBritain's throne, after his father,Prince Charles. After the ceremony,Queen Elizabeth II gave the newly-weds new royal titles. They are nowthe Duke and Duchess of Cambridge.For the wedding, William, a militaryman, wore the scarlet red tunic of anIrish Guards officer. Kate revealed hermuch-anticipated, highly secret satinand lace white dress.Their smiles and joy lit up the churchand drew cheers from excited onlook-ers as the bride and groom rode in anopen carriage from the ceremony atWestminster Abbey to BuckinghamPalace, to begin a full day of partiesand receptions.

A Strike Against TerrorPresident Barack Obamaannounced the death of terroristOsama bin Laden on Sunday nightOsama bin Laden, leader of the ter-rorist group al-Qaeda, was killed in afirefight with U.S. forces on Sundaynight in Abbottabad, Pakistan. Themilitary operation took about 40 min-utes. No Americans were killed.

The world's most-wanted terroristwas tracked down in a hideout about90 miles north of Islamabad,

Pakistan's capital. U.S. helicopterscarried about two dozen troops intothe compound, which is surroundedby 18-foot-high walls and topped withbarbed wire. Bin Laden was killed,officials said, after he and his body-guards resisted the assault."Justice has been done," PresidentBarack Obama said in a televisionappearance late Sunday night.

Why Bin Laden? Bin Laden's death marks the end of a10-year search that began after theSeptember 11 attacks by al-Qaeda,the terrorist group he founded.Hijackers flew planes into the WorldTrade Center twin towers in New YorkCity, and into the Pentagon—head-quarters of the U.S. Department ofDefense—in Washington, D.C. Afourth plane crashed into thePennsylvania countryside. Nearly3,000 people were killed in theattacks.Al-Qaeda was also blamed for the1998 bombings of two U.S.embassies in Africa that killed 231people, the 2000 attack on the USSCole that killed 17 American sailors inYemen, as well as countless otherplots."We have rid the world of the mostinfamous terrorist of our time," LeonPanetta, director of the CentralIntelligence Agency, wrote in a memoto employees. Panetta was in chargeof the military team during the opera-tion, according to one official.Speaking at the White House onMonday, President Obama said theworld is safer after the death of binLaden. "We can all agree that this is agood day for America," he said.

20 Friday, May 13, 2011

MADDIE MUM: MY TORTURE

Madeleine McCann's moth-er Kate reveals paedophilefears in new book in TheSun By ANTONELLA LAZZERIand OLIVER HARVEYMadeleine McCann's moth-er has told for the first timeof terrible visions that herkidnapped daughter isbeing abused by a pervert. In a heart-rending bookserialised from today inThe Sun, Kate, 43, writeshow she is haunted by

"flashes" of Madeleine"screaming" for her andhusband Gerry. The couple also tell TheSun exclusively aboutbeing at the centre of oneof the most harrowing sto-ries of modern times. Kate says four years after

her three-year-old wassnatched on a family hol-iday in Portugal: "The

idea that my Madeleine wastaken by a paedophile ismy worst fear. "I became consumed withit. It was torture for me. Itwas horrible, so vivid. "It's worse when I go to bedand think about that firstawful night again, whenMadeleine went missing. "That sense of dark andfear, of being desperate to

sleep but not being able to.I just end up plummetingdown again."The emotion-charged bookby ex-GP Kate is titled sim-ply Madeleine. She and consultant cardi-ologist Gerry, 42, admitthey are plagued by guiltover the night Madeleinevanished from their holidayapartment in Praia da Luzwhile they enjoyed a mealwith friends at a tapas bar.Read more: http://www.the-sun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3567599/MADDIE-M U M - M Y - T O R T U R E -Madeleine-McCanns-mum-Kate-reveals-paedophile-fears-in-new-book-in-The-Sun.html#ixzz1LgKVUT5O


WHAT THE BRITISHPAPERS SAY

From (SUN LOGO) last week:Clegg crisis after vote

disaster DOES Nick Clegg's thrashing signalthe end of the Coalition? The answeris no - not yet. But it must surely bethe beginning of the end.The voters' message is that the Lib

Dems are catastrophically damagedand perhaps finished as a politicalforce.They must now cling to their detested

Tory partners for dear life - or risk oblit-eration in a general election. Equallyobvious is Ed Miliband's failure as acharismatic leader in his first major test.

He scored a few extra council seats -but LOST the AV campaign he led andwas humiliated in Labour's formerScottish heartlands. But this was a stun-ning result for David Cameron. TheTories, braced for sweeping losses,actually gained a couple of councils andheld more seats than they had daredhope.Labour and the Lib Dems now know

that anyone who pulls the plug on theCoalition and forces a snap electioncould see the Tories storm to victory.Nick Clegg's arch-enemy, Chris Huhne,will think carefully before trying to kickhim out. It could be suicide.

Yet all this makes it much harder forDavid Cameron if he is tempted to throwface-saving concessions to the LibDems to save Mr Clegg's neck.

Right-wing Tories feel they havealready swallowed plenty on issues likelaw and order, tax rates and EU med-dling.The results may encourage them to digtheir heels in. By TOM NEWTON DUNN PoliticalEditor, and GRAEME WILSON, DeputyPolitical Editor. Read more:http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/home-page/news/3567462/Clegg-crisis-after-vote-disaster.html#ixzz1LgJz5mlq

‘DISABLED’ SWINDLER IS CAUGHTSKY-DIVING

A BENEFITS cheat who claimed she couldonly walk with crutches sky-dived from aplane at 12,000ft, a court was told yesterday.Clare Jones, 37, gave a thumbs-up sign asshe made the tandem jump harnessed to anexperienced parachutist.She had paid another sky-diver to film herhurtling towards the ground at 120mph.The film shows her landing comfortably onboth feet and smiling and chatting with thecamera operator. But investigators, acting onan anonymous tip-off, later seized the damn-ing footage as proof of her fraud.It was viewed yesterday by magistrates atPontypridd, Mid Glamorgan, as the mother-of-three admitted fiddling £6,000 in incapac-ity benefits and disability living allowance.Jones, of Tonypandy, had made at least 40visits to a gym using the facilities, swimmingpool and sauna.

By John Tworney Read more:http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/245194/-Disabled-swindler-is-caught-sky-diving--Disabled-swindler-is-caught-sky-diving-#ixzz1LgMYlulc

INSIDE OSAMA'SSQUALID HIDEAWAY

New pictures emerge as The White Housegets set to release Bin Laden pics.Shaky footage shows a litter-strewn com-

pound in a barely habitable state.U.S. may also release home videos foundduring raid .

House worth no more than $250,000 sayexperts.

Extraordinary footage of Osama BinLaden's secret compound in Abbottabadshow the terror leader had been living invirtual squalor. Strewn with rubbish andwith paint peeling off the walls, the dirt-infested compound appears barely habit-

able and is a far cry from initial claims thecompound was a sophisticated £1m hide-away.

The ramshackle structure resembles abuilding site and the pictures of the out-side show steel rods protruding from theroof, suggesting it may have been incom-plete.

Of course, some damage would havebeen caused during the American NavySeal mission to capture the 9/11 master-mind, but the footage is still very reveal-ing.

By Daily Mail Reporter Read more:http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1384573/Osama-Bin-Ladens-squalid-hideaway-pictures.html#ixzz1LgNiPkUY

Clare Jones, 37, gave a thumbs-upsign as she made the tandem jump

The Daily Express Saturday May 7

From the Daily Mail last weekend

22 Friday, May 13, 2011


Richard moved to Spain four years ago havingleft his management background behind inthe UK and decided to use his IT skills to helphome users and small businesses with theirPC problems. Now a relaxed 'computer man'he is out and about in the Spanish sun everyday, making house and shop calls and usinghis vast experience and qualifications to (usu-ally) sort out the problem there and then.Computers are his hobby as well as his workso don’t be surprised to get an answer to youremail in the early hours!

RICHARD CAVENDERBluemoon Solutions www.bluemoonsolutions.es

BlueMoon Solutions is the computer and IT services com-pany on the Costa Blanca, they provide quality computerservices at realistic prices and specialise in working with

home users and small businesses.

[email protected] www.bluemoonsolutions.es

Mobile: 655 044 970 Office: 902 906 200

FIXED FOR FREE: Caroline came along to out ourComputer Clinic and got her laptop fixed for free!

Caroline had a problem with her laptop in that she used to beable to connect wirelessly to the Internet at her home, howeverfor the past few days she has not been able to connect andevery time she starts her laptop the wireless icon shows as dis-connected. After investigation we found that she had inadver-tently turned off the wireless on her laptop. This is so easilydone accidentally – most laptops have a button somewhere toenable or disable the wireless receiver, if you don’t know whereyou’re is then you should locate it now so that you know if thesame thing were to happen to you in the future. Most laptopshave a light to indicate whether the receiver is turned on or off– some have a display that appears on the laptop screen as in this case. The fix was simple, wejust turned on the wireless receiver and everything was working again.

Dave was having difficulty typing emails because hekept accidentally pressing the caps-lock key

Hi Richard, love the column, thought I would write to ask you about my new laptop, Ihave had it only 3 weeks and it's driving me mad! I keep accidentally pressing the caps-lock key and I dont notice until I have been typing for ages. I'm not great with a computerand the problem is that whilst I have been concentrating on the keyboard I look up andfind a whole paragraph of text, half of which is in capitals, I then have to delete it and

start again - you won't believe how long it takes me to write an email! Is there anything I can do?

Hi Dave, well my gut reaction was no, there is nothing you can do, other than stop press-ing the caps-lock key, however following a bit of research and talking to my partners in theUK, it seems that you can disable the key that is causing you problems in Windows 7 andgiven that you mention you have had your computer for only 3 weeks I am going to

assume that is what you are using? To disable the caps-lock key you will need to edit the registry,this is something that is really well "under the bonnet" stuff and should only be considered by anexperienced engineer so I would advise you don't do it yourself. What you need to do is to editthe registry key "Scancode map" which can be located at..

HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SYSTEM\CurrentControlSet\Control\Keyboard Layout

...what you need to do is change the value to 00000000 00000000 02000000 00003A00 00000000after that you should restart your computer and your caps-lock key should be disabled.

SOLVED: Bob was having problems with his Windows Updates.

Richard, since my laptop recently updated Windows 7, when-ever I switch it on; a message appears to say “Updating win-dows 0% completed”. This stays on the screen for up to 10minutes and then changes to “update failed” before allowingme to use the computer normally. What can I do?

Hi Bob, it sounds to me like your Windows Update folder has becomecorrupt, what you need to do is to clear it out, that will clear outthe “bad” windows update that is causing this problem, to dothat you should navigate to c:\windows\softwaredistribution and in that folder you will findanother folder called “downloads”, just delete the contents of the downloads folder and

then restart your computer, that should fix the problem with the boot up. It does still mean howeverthat you have missing Windows updates, so you should also run windows update and manuallyinstall any updates that are missing. If you have trouble deleting the contents of the downloadsfolder then it could be that you will need to stop the Automatic Updates service before you deletethe files and start it again afterwards, if this is the case then just give me a quickring as its easy to talk through on the phone.

Q

Q

A

A

Read Richard’s fantastic computer page onlyin Jungle Drums Magazine.

OUT NOW

SOLVED: Jackie was having some trouble with InternetExplorer displaying incorrectly

Richard, I don’t know why but when I go online on mynetbook, the image is bigger than the screen so I can’tsee the toolbar at the top and therefore can’t get offwhatever web page I am on. It hasn’t always been likethis. What have I done to cause this? The computer is

working fine apart from that.

Hi Jackie, it wasn’t at first obvious to me what your prob-lem was, however after a quick phone call it was clearthat you had inadvertently pressed the F11 button whilst

using Internet Explorer. What this does is place the program in“full screen” mode and it removes the navigation bars from the top and bottom leaving you with justthe web page. It can be pretty disconcerting if you don’t know you have done it, but just pressingthe F11 button again will put things back to how they should be.

QA

Steve had a question about his AVG antivirus runningout and what he could do.

Hi Richard, my AVG anti virus tells me that itneeds to be updated, but every time I clickon the link it tries to sell me the full version,is the free version not available any more?

Hi Steve, AVG do this from time to time,when they release a new version of their excellent antivirus product they promote the 'paidfor' new alternative - I assume that it's their way of making extra sales. You're right

though, the free edition is still available and you can download it from this link -http://free.avg.com/us-en/download. You don't need to remove your old version as the new one willautomatically detect what is missing and upgrade it where necessary. One of the bad things aboutthe new version is its sheer size, it's a download of over 100Mb, so if you fancy a change or yourInternet connection isn't that good you should consider swapping to Microsoft Security Essentials,it a much smaller download, it's also free and its doing pretty well in critical review as well - it canbe downloaded from http://www.microsoft.com/en-us/security_essentials

QA

Don’t forget that we have a computer clinicevery Wednesday at Print Solutions shop in LaMarina (Calle Londres, near the Pasty Shack)from 4pm to 6pm, bring along your computer,you never know you might get it fixed for free!

24 Friday, May 13, 2011

THAI TO DIE FOR!Feeling adventurous? How about rustling up something authentic and

tasty tonight with the Courier guide to Thai food – delicious!

THAI food is adored and savoured forthe perfect aroma and taste of its vari-ous dishes and Thai food is a perfectblend of neighbouring regions like Indiaand China, which seems to satisfy theWestern palate.

Similar to various types of Asian cuisine,Thai food mainly includes rice and noodlesbut Apart from rice, Thai cuisine alsoincludes numerous savoury fish recipes,vegetables, herbs and spices that bring asalty, saucy and sour flavour to this irre-sistible Eastern delight.

However, those health conscious people

among you (yes, there are!) are inquisitiveabout a basic question - "Is Thai foodhealthy?" Frankly speaking, health benefitsof Thai food entirely depend on the kind ofThai recipes that you consume.

Important Thai Food Facts

Harmony of taste is the basic principle ofThai food, which you can easily find in allthe Thai recipes that you make or order andremember that Thai food recipes like TomYum soup, chilli hot chicken, fish cakes andPhad ka Prao are all made with a perfectbalance of ingredients and flavour.

So before finding the answer to the ques-tion - "Is Thai food healthy?” we need tounderstand that Thai food doesn't containbig meat chunks or large dead animals. Themeat that is included in the Thai food is for-tified and shredded with various herbs andhealthy vegetables and it’s this that makesThai food all the more healthy and tempt-ing.

Secondly, authentic Thai food recipes areprepared with some of the healthiest cook-ing methods such as stewing, grilling andbaking, that include least amount of oil andhence they preserve the food's nutrition tothe fullest.

Other cooking methods like frying, deepfrying and stir frying were introduced tothem by foreign countries like China andJapan and, surprisingly, Thai food is alsohugely influenced by Dutch, French andPortuguese cuisine and other nearby Asianregions like Vietnam, Burma, Malaysia andLaos but not, thank goodness, the USA…

Aside from being one of the most popularsoups in Thailand, Tom Yum Soup hasmany health benefits, due its potent combi-nation of herbs and spices. In fact, this Thaisoup is currently under scientific study, as itappears to have immune-boosting poweras a natural remedy for cold and flu viruses.

Thai food street style

EXPERIENCE the taste of real India at the award winning Rani’s Indian Restaurant, ahidden treasure which is most certainly full of Eastern Promise.

Rani’s which means Queen in India and named after the owner, creates the rightambience for whatever the occasion as customers are treated like royalty. With thechefs each bringing their own wealth of experience, ideas and flavours, blendedtogether, it’s the winning combination their aim to serve authentic home cookedIndian Cuisine. With the relaxed settings, friendly warm atmosphere and of coursearoma of exotic spices and the finest Ingredients it’s little wonder Rani’s won theCoastRiders Culinary Award last year for Best Indian Restaurant .

Established over 2 years, this ever popular restaurant hosts a first class menu of alltraditional home style Indian specialties. Situated in Citrus Centro Commercial withinUrb Horizonte, Playa Flamenca, a warm welcome awaits you.

Along with the cosy Interior the restaurant features a large sun terrace, ideal forthese long hot summer days, fantastic food and good company, that’s why customerskeep coming back, Rani’s motto ‘ a night to remember’ is very appropriate, and highlyrecommended for all curry lovers.

The menu home to all our favourite dishes whether it be Korma, Tandoori, FishPunjabi or Chicken Jalfrezi also has an excellent choice of vegetarian dishes.From Naans, starters, rice to main dishes the menu is vast, with Chefs specials, there

is something to tempt your palates, for the youngsters there is kids meals or why notorder a take-away Indian Style Pizza any naan bread and a curry topping of yourchoice.

If it’s not on the menu, the chefs will prepare all dishes to suit customer’s require-ments. It’s not only the taste that is important the presentation also adds to thisunique dining experience.

With their early bird menufrom 5.00 p.m. – 7.00 p.m.the 4course meal at 7.95 euro’s isperfect for after work, there isalso a 10 % discount on take-away orders over 20 euro or ifvino is your tipple, you can optfor a free bottle of wine.

You can find them on face-book and as booking is advis-able telephone 966 197 677 andlet your taste buds sample thefinest authentic Indian Cuisine.

Open 7 days its award win-ning style makes Rani’s IndianRestaurant Bar and Take-Awaya hit with regulars and visitorsalike and why it’s such a suc-cess in the area.


and get along to Rani's

Ingredients

2 tablespoons Butter or Margarine1 (20 ounces) package Boneless SkinlessChicken Breasts, cut into 1/2-inch cubes 1 medium (1/2 cup) Onion, chopped 1 teaspoon ground Cumin 1 teaspoon Lemon Pepper 1 teaspoon Dried Oregano Leaves 1/2 teaspoon Garlic Salt 2 (14.5-ounce) cans Chicken Broth 2 (15-ounce) cans Pinto Beans withJalapeños2 (11-ounce) cans White Corn 1 to 2 teaspoons Chipotle Chilli’s in AdoboSauce, chopped 2 Bay Leaves 2 tablespoons Fresh Lime Juice 2 tablespoons Sugar 1/4 cup chopped Fresh Cilantro

Garnish Ingredients:

Finely chopped Red Pepper, if desired Fresh Lime Wedges, if desired

How to make it

1. Add butter to large saucepan. Heat overmedium heat.2. Sauté chicken pieces, onion, cumin,lemon pepper, oregano, and garlic salt untilchicken is cooked through.3. Stir in chicken broth, dried pinto beans,corn, chipotle chillies and bay leaves.4. Continue cooking over medium 8 to 10minutes.5. Reduce heat to low, and simmer 30 min-utes.6. Remove from heat. Remove bay leaf. Stirin fresh lime juice, sugar, and cilantro.7. Serve in individual bowls, and top with redpepper and fresh lime wedges.

Hot Chicken Chilli

Ingredients

4 pints of chicken broth, 2stalks of lemongrass(sliced on a bias in 2 inch-es pieces), 4 kaffir limeleaves, 1 inch piece offresh galangal or ginger(sliced), 2 red chillies(sliced), 2 tablespoons offish sauce (e.g. nam pla),1.5 teaspoons of sugar, 1can of straw mushrooms(rinsed and cut into half), 1pound of large sizeshrimps (peeled but keep

the tails), juice from 2limes, 2 green onions(sliced), 1/2 cup of freshcilantro (chopped).

The Making

Firstly, prepare asaucepan, pour in stockand bring to boil overmedium heat. Add inlemongrass, kaffir limeleaves, galangal and chill-ies. Reduce heat to medi-um low heat; simmer thesoup for 15 minutes.

Add fish sauce, mush-rooms, and sugar.Simmer for another 5minutes. Add in shrimpand cook for another 8minutes. Remove the heat and addlime juice, green onion,and cilantro. Taste for saltand spices, you shouldhave an equal balance ofspicy, sour and salty. Note that lemongrass andlime leaves are for flavouronly and avoid from eat-ing.

TOM YUM SOUP

CURRY UP!

A HOT, clear day. Me, my scooter and a ride out to LaFuente commercial centre adjacent to the picturesqueCampoamor Golf and Los Ramblas Golf to have a lookaround. I’d not been down there for a couple of yearsand it’s changed a bit in that time; more new businessesfilling the place, always a promising start.

Firstly, if you’ve never been, La Fuente is not one of thosecommercial centres that look like they’ve been dropped froma crane, it’s been planned rather well and I found my wayaround easily. (I have been known to be ’lost’ I commercialcentres before…).

The first place I went into had a great name; Footsteps avery fashionable shop on first inspection and after a little

nosing around I discovered the family run business’s own-ers, Julia and Alan who told me that they have many yearsexperience in the footwear and fashion trade and are dedi-cated to providing their customers with the very best ofappealing items - and fortunately for us customers, they doit at the most affordable prices. I can’t list the vast stock herebut suffice to say they stock a lot! Including, a large selectionof Maxi Dresses from 10€ and Sandals and Flip Flops from10€ too. They refresh the stock weekly and are open everyday of the week, or if you can’t wait, take a peek at their web-site: www.footstep-spain.com

It always good to find a business that obviously takes apride in what it does and one look inside Tu Baño and youcan see the quality of their work. They don’t only offer newbathrooms though as they have a wealth of experience inhousehold maintenance, repairs and improvements. Theseare handy people to know, how many times have you calledaround trying to find a plumber or an electrician and wouldn’tit have been handy to have just one place to call for all that.Their experienced tradesmen offer central heating installa-tions, replacement windows and much more. Has the oldboiler packed up (there’s a joke there fellas) or are you con-sidering solar heating, Tu Baño can advise, quote and assistwith your options, and they are very friendly to deal with andbest of all not pushy at all. Just what I like. Give them a callon 636 844 515 or pop in – and by the way, that number isworth keeping as they offer a 24 hour emergency call outservice.

Moving on and there’s another familiar name in front of me,Magellan Properties, I know these guys have been aroundfor a while which in the current climate says a lot for anestate agent and they are, I discover, one of the longestestablished and trusted estate agents in the area.

Inside it truly is an international office and all sorts of lan-guages can be heard manning the phones and dealing with

clients, Russian, German and Scandinavian, plus, of course,English and Spanish the staff at Magellan operate an inter-national network and the multilingual staff offer properties forsale to a wide range of clients including abroad and in Spain.

At the moment they told me that they urgently need wellpriced properties for waiting investors and the best bit is theywill market your property without compromise so there areno costs if they do not achieve the sale of your property. Atthe moment they are featuring the popular Las RamblasCentre and they are specialists in the Ramblas Golf Resort,see for yourselves at: www.magellan.es and www.lasram-blas4u.co.uk.

I’ve built up a thirst already so it’s over to what’s popularlyknown amongst golfers as the 19th hole - the famous Irish

26 Friday, May 13, 2011

ON YER BIKE…and off to La Fuente, Centro Comercial

Bar Bernie D’Arcy’s. Handily, for golfers and the rest of us,it’s ideally situated here, close to Campo del GolfCampoamor and, its the perfect place to celebrate thatBirdie (pretend, I did) with friends and family or worry aboutyour handicap over a few Irish whiskeys. I settled for an Irishcoffee which did its job perfectly but D’Arcy’s also claims toserve the best pint of Guinness on the Costa Blanca. That isobviously a claim that I will need to test, if not daily then atleast weekly until I can confirm their claim – test them outyourselves! They’re open from 3pm till late you can be sureof a good old fashioned Irish welcome.

Refreshed and off to explore once more, Viva la Vida hasan inviting sign, ‘Come and try our fabulous new menuinspired by our new Chef Steve’ so I go in. I’m not actuallyhungry yet, but there’s something to be said about lookingaround a restaurant and then booking at a later date withthat knowledge. There a busy lot here with breakfast, Lunchand three course evening meals served everyday, plus aThursday Quiz night and a Sunday Cabaret/Karaoke withSteve Clarke.

Happy Hour is seven days a week 4pm till 7pm, and that’sthree hours – but don’t tell them in case they’ve not noticed!Beers are well priced too with all Draughts at 2€ a pint andif you like your spirits a house spirit and mixer is just 2.50€.a large sunny terrace is pleasant for a meal and the friendlyStaff and relaxed atmosphere makes Viva la Vida a certaintyfor a return from me, interestingly too every Tuesday theyhave a Tarot and Palm Reader from 7.30pm, so I guessthey’ll know when I’m coming too, but I guess it’s alwaysbest to ring and book, just in case.

Going Spanish now and again suits me, especially whenthe friends and relatives are over and wanting to go ‘authen-tic’ but with some chips. A visit to Fuego Tapas & Wine BarBistro will satisfy them trust me. Their fine selection of Tapaswill have something for even the fussiest palette and is con-stantly refreshed to keep your mouth watering, sizzlingPrawns and Al a carte specials offer even more of a tastychoice and if you fancy getting out and about in the eveningwhy not start the weekend with the Bistro’s barbeque everyFriday night from 7pm with live entertainment.

For those with a homesick palette, no problem as they arefamous for their home made Burgers and the ‘fabulousSunday Lunch’ (that’s how one diner described it to me) hasa choice of pork, beef or chicken, and four veg. mash, roastpotatoes, home made yorkshires, bacon and sausage meat

stuffing and gravy make up the choices for just 6.95€ notbad eh? Open Monday to Friday 5pm till late with a Happyhour Monday to Friday from 5pm until 7pm they offer LiveSports on a big screen and can cater for parties. Ladies?Thursdays are for you with cocktails 2 for 1. Saturday andSunday they open from 1pm till late.

I do like a shop that sells just about everything. Not only arethey handy, but for a nosey bloke like me, it’s fascinatingwhat you can find.Inside Spar Mini Market they stock all the leading Englishbrands at low prices, many of their prices are even lowerthan bigger English supermarkets plus they stock a goodselection of frozen food and top quality frozen meat( handyfor those summer Barbies? ).

Somewhere I could smell some of the fresh hot pies thatare cooked daily but lunch was going to have to wait as Ichecked out the other services on offer. Bike hire for onething! Either daily or weekly, and at great rates with discountfor weekly hire. Unconnected but just as important for someare the photocopying and fax facilities and if you need to getpost off to family back in the UK they offer an Easypost mailservice daily to the UK and beyond plus passport renewalservice and mailboxes which are very reasonable at 49.99€a year

Further investigation revealed that Spar offer brand newand unlocked mobile phones with the cheapest call rates onthe market- i.e. calls to UK landlines from 5c per minute, andwith the phones costing from 49.99€ and ready to use with5euro free credit, I’m buying one! There’s not enough roomon this page to mention everything they do but I cant gowithout letting you know that they do have a large choice ofgreetings cards for every occasion and every card is pricedat only 1.50€.Stop press: they’ve told me to let readers know that coming

soon they will have Spanish red & white wine supplied by atraditional Spanish bodega. Sold by the litre so bring yourown container and fill up as much as you like - at unbeliev-able prices.

If you’re looking for something different, from the dining tothe décor, you must pay a visit to Crystals Restaurant.

The superbly decorated interior is dominated by an impres-sive chandelier (I wouldn’t want to clean it…) but the aromais pure home made and talking to Sarah Collins who runsthe front of the house I find out that everything is made inhouse, from Breads to ice creams and desserts - with onlyfresh produce used, it smells superb and I’m getting serious-ly hungry as chef Greg Collings artfully prepares more dish-es for the diners around me. Their tasty Menu del Nochechanges every two weeks and is worth keeping your eye outfor at just 12.50€ for three delicious courses. Sunday Lunchis affordable and good value at 10€ for a three course mealand if you like a little music while you dine every Tuesdayand Friday you can enjoy your meal with Dan Davy vocalistand/or on a Saturday Adam Slater, the award winning vocal-ist. Weddings and any type of celebrations are catered forbut, of course, as with those looking to book a table a reser-vation is a must if you don’t want to be disappointed.

At the end of May a Moroccan Theme night including 5/6courses with a different wine for every course should leavepeople smiling (or singing) and further details are comingsoon. To find out more or book a table give them a call on966 774 439 or 652216608 or you can check them out your-selves online at: www.crystalsrestaurant.com


It’s that time of year againthat causes millions ofpeople to live in terror for24 hours. Another Friday13th is upon us.

Millions of people through-out the world live in terror ofthis particular day and virtu-ally become a recluse intheir own home with an irra-tional fear that somethingawful is about to befall them.

Such superstitious beliefsare also quite prevalent inGreece and Spain whereusually Tuesday the 13th isconsidered the unluckiestday.

In 2009 there were THREEFriday the13ths for the poorphobic person to endure –February, March andNovember. Thankfully thisdoesn’t happen again until2015 and 2026 but eachyear has at least one ofthem and 2011 falls into thatcategory this month.

But did you know that fearof the number 13 is calledTriskaidekaphobia and fearof Friday the 13th is knownas Paraskavedekatriaphobia?

Paraskavedekatriaphobiaderives from a word madeup of a combination of theNorse and Greek root wordsfor 'Friday' (Paraskeví), '13'(dekatreís) and 'fear' (pho-bia).

Friday has long been con-sidered unlucky for many

reasons such as in religion,with Jesus being crucifiedon a Friday, to the mythical. Frigga was a Scandinavian

love goddess who was wor-shipped on the sixth day ofthe week. Christians calledFrigga a witch and consid-ered Friday to be the witch-es' day.

Some academics suggestthat the fear of the number13 originated in a myth,whereby 12 gods were hav-ing a feast in Valhalla. It’ssaid that the naughty andcrafty Loki disrupted theevent and appeared as the13th guest. This made Hod,(the blind god of darkness)throw a branch of mistletoeat Balder (the god of delightand cheerfulness). Balderwas instantly killed and theEarth was forced into eter-

nal darkness and mourning.One famous person whosupposedly had a fear of thenumber 13 was QueenVictoria. The story goes thatshe was invited to a dinnerbut refused to join the otherguests because she wouldhave been the 13th at thetable - until someone point-ed out that one of the guestswas pregnant!

Millions of people through-out the world have strangephobias and over the years Ihave helped some to over-come them using Fast TrackHypnosis, which normallytakes four sessions. Using the calming effects ofmy method, the subcon-scious mind is allowed tosee the phobia in a veryfunny way. The theorybehind this is quite simple -by laughing at your phobiayou cannot be frightened ofit, and if you are not fright-ened of it, it goes away.

What started out as a per-sonal interest about the var-ious phobias that peoplecan have, ended up with mecompiling a list and puttingin on my website. They range from fear of the

mother in law,Penthraphobia, to the fear oflong words, Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia ,which would in itself makethe person have a phobiaabout a phobia!

Oh, and guess what, that’scalled Photophobia!Over the years I have com-

piled a list of phobias andtheir names - and it may sur-prise you to know that it nowextends to over 250 and isstill growing.

Two fears I have success-fully treated but as yet havefound no name for, is a pho-bia of hair remover andanother of plastic spiders!

Alan Gilchrist holds hisFast Track Hypnosis ses-sions in Cabo Roig,Guardamar and Benidorm.For an appointment,brochure or free initial con-sultation, contact Alan on659 229 408 - or visit hiswebsite www.alangilchrist.com.

Friday 13th Facts

• Famous people born onFriday the 13th includeSamuel Beckett (13 April1906), Margaret Thatcher(13 October 1923), FidelCastro (13 August 1926)and Steve Buscemi (13December 1957).

• Every year has at least oneand at most three Fridaythe13ths.

• The longest period that canoccur without a Friday the13th is 14 months.

• The Uruguayan rugbyteam’s plane crashed in theAndes mountain range onFriday 13 October, 1972.

• Black Sabbath's epony-mous debut album wasreleased in the UK onFriday, February 13, 1970.

• Tupac Shakur died onFriday, September 13, 1996.

• The independent horrorflick Friday the 13th wasreleased in May 1980 anddespite only having a budg-et of $550,000 it grossed$39.7 million at the boxoffice in the United States.

• Its sequel, Friday the 13thPart II, was released a yearlater in May 1981.

• The remake of the originalFriday the 13th was sched-uled for release on Friday,February 13, 2009.

28 Friday, May 13, 2011

By Alan GilchristCosta Blanca's Top Hypnotherapist

Time to panic - it’s Friday the 13th!

Queen Victoria

Tupac Shakur


OUT ONTHE 5thEVERYMONTH

Sing In the car and you’ll be safer!According to a recent British report, people who listen to music in the carhave less accidents so we thought we’d give you a list of great driving music.1. Golden Earring - Radar Love (1974)

With that chugging beat andlyrics that begin "I've beendriving all night, my hands weton the wheel," "Radar Love" isthe perfect song for cross-country night driving with noobjective other than beingwith the one you love ASAP.Surprisingly, this universallywell-known classic did noteven make the pop top 10upon its initial release.2. Stealers Wheel - Stuck In the Middle with You (1973)

This parody of Bob Dylan's style by Scots Gerry Raffertyand Joe Egan locks into an outstanding rhythm for gentle 4-wheel cruising. The song was produced by classic pop song-writers Jerry Leiber and Mike Stoller. Who can help but joinin with the instantly memorable chorus "Clowns to the left ofme, jokers to the right, here I am...stuck in the middle withyou?"3. The Cars - Let's Go (1979)

"Let's Go," from the Cars second album Candy-O includesone of the most brilliant pauses in the history of pop music.Those few seconds between "She says" and "Let's go"make the entire song work. I must admit I still don't com-pletely understand "She's so beautiful now, she doesn't wearher shoes." As one would expect from their name, the Carsmade several great driving songs, but "Let's Go" is the best.4. Derek and the Dominos - Layla (1972)

"Layla" by Eric Clapton'salter ego band, Derek andthe Dominos, is one of thetop rock classics of alltime. The extended instru-mental fade out is a warmantidote for a long, lonelydrive. Duane Allman'sslide guitar solo willexpose and soothe anybrand of emotional distur-bance. Lock it in for anylengthy solo drive.

5. John Mellencamp - Authority Song (1984)You might find yourself pounding the steering wheel along

as the crack of the drums and guitar kick in. Irresistiblemelody, defiant singalong lyrics, and a big dose ofattitude...in other words, great for driving!6. Wall of Voodoo - Mexican Radio (1982)

It's a bit of a left-field selec-tion, but this classic is addic-tive from hearing it the firsttime. It's all about dialling in aMexican station from dustyborder territory. The next timeyou're headed along dustyhighways from Texas toCalifornia, make sure thisclassic is on your playlist.7. Billy Ocean - Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car(1988)It may be crass and commercial, but it's also great carmusic. Billy Ocean launched a song that has the perfect beatfor slow top-down convertible cruising along the city strip.You'll be singing along in no time.8. Beatles - Drive My Car (1966)

"Drive My Car" kicks off the Beatles' Rubber Soul, one ofthe greatest pop albums of all time. It's easy to enjoy on adrive and sing along to the chorus, but when listened toclosely, the lyrics are among the Beatles' most witty. "Beepbeep, beep beep, yeah!"9. Beach Boys - Little Deuce Coupe (1963)

Cars were a keyelement of a numberof the Beach Boys'early classics. "LittleDeuce Coupe" ispossibly the best. Ifthere was ever alove song written to acar, this is it. Justsubstitute whatyou've got for thewords "little deucecoupe," and yourauto will be purring in loving response.

10. Eagles - Take It Easy (1972)For many, "I’m running down

the road tryin’ to loosen myload, I’ve got seven womenon my mind," were the firstwords they ever heard fromthe Eagles. The song contin-ues on exploring the joys ofcruising around beingadmired by members of theopposite gender. It was an 8-track classic, now burn it tothe nearest CD.What are your top driving songs? Let us know [email protected]

ARE YOU CAR-BERA STREISAND?Or JOHNNY CRASH?!

ARE YOU A SINGER OR A WHINGER IN YOUR MOTOR?

We went out on the streets and asked Courier readers– Do you sing in the car?Julie from La Zenia said: I’m one of those people......Your

sitting at a red light, minding your own business, sippingyour coffee when you look over and see them. That’sright, they're bobbin their head, singing into an air micro-phone, and all the while dancing. That’s me. I feel likewhen I’m in my car that's my time to jam. Turn the stereoup, pop in my favourite cd and start cranking it up.

I love to sing in the car, it totally destresses me whetherit is from work, kids or just life in general. I just get in mycar crank up the music and sing and dance....safely, safe-ly of course said Pam from La Marina

Our sales team member, Myra had to admit: ‘I probablylook like a nut or some mental patient talking to herselfsometimes, I don't care cause I am enjoying myself.’

Vanessa in Gran Alacant confessed: I don't think I havea bad voice, but I find it funny when my daughter says‘mum no more singing’ But now she's starting to sing inthe car with me....I absolutely love that.Finally we found a man who would admit to singing in the

car, Alan from Villamartin Confessed: ‘Yes. I'll admit it. I dosing in the car. Especially when I'm really bored and havenothing better to do. Sometimes under my breath, some-times as loud as I can. Just to wake up the person driv-ing!’His friend Graham also confessed: ‘I usually listen to theCD and play OLD country songs. Johnny Cash, PatsyCline...etc., I know the words to Most all of them. That'swhat I grew up listening to when I was a kid. I like to turnup the stereo and sing but my daughter will look at me likeI am mad.

30 Friday, May 13, 2011

FRIDAY 13th

SATURDAY 14th

SUNDAY 15th

MONDAY 16th

TUESDAY 17th

WEDNESDAY 18th

THURSDAY 19th

Celtic Drop in Playa FlamencaBar Horacios in Las MimosasBlack Bull in El ChaperalCoopers Arms in Dona PepaInn at the Green in Entre NaranjosMosquito’s Bar in La FloridaThe Black Bull in San LuisLos Belgas in Gran AlacantCheers Bar in Eagles NestMariposa Hotel in Sierra de EspunaRusty Nail in Campoverde

Celtic Drop in Playa FlamencaBar Mary in Pinar de CampoverdeLa Batalla in RoldanBushwacka in Cabo RoigInn at the Green in Entre NaranjosTemptations in Cabo RoigLos Belgas in Gran AlacantManga Norte Restaurant in La MangaThe Club in Quesada Bull in Gran AlacantThe Cavalier in San LuisLas Naciones in QuesadaJudges Chambers in Playa Flamenca

Pablo’s International bar in La FloridaMorgan’s Bar in Eagles NestSnug Bar in Torre de la HorredadaInn at the Green in Entre NaranjosBar Liquid in Cabo RoigSmiling Jacks in Cabo RoigBar Catorce in BenijofarCasa Ventura in San LuisWaikiki in Las SiestaSmiling Jacks in Cabo Roig

Inn at the green in Entre NaranjosCheers Bar in Eagles NestBar Rosa in Los MontesinosCeltic Drop in Playa FlamencaThe Stray Sod in La FuenteInn at the Green in Entre NaranjosMorgan’s Bar in Eagles NestMontes Bar in Los MontesinosAbbey Tavern in La FloridaRestaurant La Boca in Playa Los LocosCheers bar In Eagles NestThe Cavalier in San LuisInn at the Green in Entre NaranjosBerny D’arcys in La FuenteStray Sod in La FuenteSlievenamon in Cabo RoigThe Priory in El Galan

Kens QuizNikki GQuiz night with Darren JamesCut looseJohnno O’KeefeCrazy Bingo with SpikeCurtisFun Music QuizCelena DeansB.J BluesmanQuiz NightWoodyFun Music Quiz with Lynden BCutlooseCelena DeansJim KellyLenny Mitchell

Celtic Drop in Playa FlamencaThe Judges Chambers in Playa FlamencaPirate Bar in Playa Flamenca

Cabaroke with Davy JonesThe FaithLoose ChangeLorna MichelleMaria O’HaraCabaroke with BonoLoose ChangeMr BojanglesKye JaymesLenny MitchellTerry Jay

Cabaroke with Davy JonesThe TrioLynden B’s KaraokeThe Mono’sMark Bailey as Michael BubleFlamenco NightBob Marley tributeLenny MitchellJustin Sane & Alan WardenKye JaymesJust Bono U2 TributeLorna MichelleTerry Jay

Cabaroke with Davy JonesCelena DeansLenny MitchellCabaroke with Matt ChristianCabaroke with BonoTerry JayLorna MichelleFun Music Quiz with Lynden B

Jon SummerTerry Jay

Fire and WaterLiam CullenNick Barker

Starting at 10pm

Starting at 10pmEasy listening Latin & Jazz 10pm

Starting at 8pm4pm

Starting at 1.30pmStarting at 5pmStarting at 4pmStarting at 10pm

Starting at 9.30pm

Starting at 9pm

Starting at 10pm

Starting at 4pm

Starting at 9pmStarting at 10.30pm

Starting at 10pmStarting at 10.30pm

DATE VENUE ACT/ EVENT OTHER INFO

WELCOME to another week of great entertainmenthere on the Costa Blanca, well not long now for allyou fans of the hit T.V series Benidorm till the manhimself, Mr Shaun Foster Conley arrives in LaZenia. He will be performing at the new concertsuite – La Zenia 4* Hotel with a full supporting acton Saturday 11th June.

Shaun, a 38 year old father of two originally fromSunderland, had been a resident singer inBenidorm for ten years before he got his big breakon T.V. he got written into the show when the writersaw him performing out here and fell in love withhis voice - particularly when he sang an Al Martinosong that he does called ‘Here in my heart’.As well as striking up friendships with the cast healso became good friends with ex cast memberJohnny Vegas who is now a big fan and says‘Shaun has a fantastic voice, he will be very suc-cessful as he is a big talent with a big voice’

In the show Shaun belts out hits from Tom Jones,including SexBomb, and just likethe Welsh singinglegend he admits hetoo has had a fewknickers thrown athim on stage whiledoing his cabaretact in Benidorm (Icouldn’t bringmyself to tell himthat it was probably

Sticky Vicky in the audience!!!!)But when he was younger he wanted to be a foot-

baller and his dream was to play for Sunderland. Hemanaged to play for the schoolboy side but he did-n’t make the grade to play professionally, so it wasa good job that music was in his blood as his dadPeter was lead singer with sixties group TheApaches.

As a child he grew up listening to Country &Western music and Elvis, then, after leaving schoolhe went on to be an apprentice - serving his time ina shipyard in the Eighties - he would sing in thetanks because he liked the deep echo it gave hisvoice, but back in those days the only thing he gotthrown at him was spanners from the welderstelling him to shut up!

Shaun still performs in Benidorm, which he says

is like a little England with all the Brits on holiday.That’s why the T.V show is such a hit; it captures itexactly. He loves the recognition that the show hasgiven him, especially when people just stop him inthe streets, but he says he hasn’t changed and willalways be himself.

His only great sadness is that his parents aren’taround to see his TV success; his mum passedaway in 1999 and his dad two years ago after suf-fering from kidney failure while Shaun was filmingBenidorm.

So don’t hang around! These tickets will sell outat a price of only €12 or €15 for VIP!Pop into Easy Ads in La Zenia or go online at

www.ticketplanner.esBut whatever you are doing this weekend, have

fun and don’t forget the May fair is still on untilSunday, and also Ben Mills from the X Factor is livein-concert tomorrow for ONE night only with sup-port from Abba Elite and hosted by Nick Gold.

Ring Night Out promotions on 966732215 or672885418 to get your last minute tickets.

Well that’s me finished for another week so ifyou’re a bar or an entertainer and want to appear inthe gig guide, or you have any events coming upthat you would like me to tell everyone about thenplease contact me by email on [email protected] or call me on 685302529 or just visit mywebsite www.starsinbars.org

Mandy


Pop Quiz May 13

1 Who sang Puppet On A String?2 This male singer had hits with If You Let MeStay and Dance Little Sister.3 Which Swedish singer recorded Save Tonightin 1997?4 Who sang We´re Going To Ibiza?5 Which legend of rock n roll died on 16thAugust 1977? 6 Who is probably the best known and originalPhantom Of The Opera (1986)?7 Which female singer sang Flashdance?8 The Who sang about Pictures Of…?9 Which “mod” band released Poison Ivy in1980?10 Which American vocalist was posthumouslychampioned by Terry Wogan and had an albumSongbird released after her death in 1996?11 Which show does Sweet Transvestite comefrom?

FIND THE KEY WORD AND TO TAKE PART LISTEN TOCHRIS ASHLEY’S SHOW ON TKO GOLD, 8AM TO 11AMEVERY MONDAY.

CHRIS WILL ASK YOU TO TEXT OR EMAIL IN THE KEYWORD AND THE WINNER OF THIS WEEK’S ANSWERWILL BE ANNOUNCED.

WIN A MEAL FOR TWO AND WINEAT QUESADA FISH & CHIPS

TKO MEDIA GROUP

TKO Gold Featured ArtistCLARE TEAL

HOT GOSSIPLook who´s back where he belongs, at last?! Lee Fox has returned tohis spiritual home after nipping out for a packet of ciggies 2 years agoand never making it back!

Foxy joined TKO FM back in 2006 when he presented the weekendbreakfast show from the Towers. He then took over our Tuesday nightsounds show “The Love Zone” which was a hugely popular show. Leethen moved to presenting the weekday early breakfast show, where he,again had a huge listenership and made the show his own.

His cheeky, smooth style has always been a hit with our listeners andwe are chuffed to have him back on TKO FM.

Lee will be presenting the weekend breakfast show, sponsored by NightOut Promotions, between 9 – midday every Saturday and Sunday. Hewill be playing a mix of classic hits and current tunes, as well as run-ning some great competitions and fun and games. You can get yourrequests in to him on 667 287 588. Go on lets get Foxy working!

Clare Teal is one of the most successful FemaleBritish jazz singers in decades with a string ofalbums behind her, including the UK National Top 20hit "Don't Talk".She has become famous not only forher singing, but also for having signed the biggestever recording contract by a British jazz singer.

Her 2004 critically acclaimed album Don't Talkreached number one in the UK Jazz Chart and num-ber twenty in the mainstream UK Albums Chart. In2005 she won the award of British jazz vocalist ofthe year, and in 2006 the award of BBC jazz vocalistof the year.

As well as her success behind the microphone sheis also a well respected radio presenter, having hadher own Big Band Show on Radio 2 for some timeand now has a second show on Sunday evenings.

You may remember that we featured her latest sin-gle One More as our Future Gold Track and thissong got a phenomenal response from not only ourlisteners but the Gold presenters too. AlthoughClare has been on the scene for a number of yearsit looks as if she may be about to break into themusic mainstream very soon. Watch out for her andremember where you heard her first.

THE RETURN OF THE PRODIGAL SON!!

TKO Media Group would like to apologise to all their loyal listeners for the disruptionin the service, earlier this week. Normal service has now been resumed and TKOwould like to say a big thank you to all their loyal listeners for bearing with them.

32 Friday, May 13, 2011

Code Cracker is a crossword puzzle with no clues;instead, every letter of the alphabet has beenreplaced by a number, the same number representingthe same letter throughout the puzzle. All you have todo is decide which letter is represented by whichnumber. In this week's puzzle, 18 represents D and 25represents M, when these letters have been enteredthroughout the puzzle, you should have enoughinformation to start guessing words and discoveringother letters.

CODE CRACKER

CRYTPIC CLUESAcross1 Drinks very softly inTom’s nightly haunts5 Following competentlegend (5)8 Intended to be heardat the closing ofParliament (5)9 Hooligan accepting oldfine, be careful! (7)10 Dispatched men in it,with some feeling (9)12 Notes fade away (3)13 I merge change ofgovernment (6)14 Make case withoutEngland’s leader (6)17/22 Fatigue from beinglet out in a fast car (3,3)18 Retrospection fromthings hid (9)20 Cecil is made fromfreezing water (7)21 Papers from govern-ment department back-ing fuel (5)23 Maintain formermonarch’s car (5)24 The enjoyment ofFrench dawn (7)

Down1 Born in the cats’ burialplaces (5)2 A pulse may be visible

in the speaker’s neck (3)3 Light metal ignited

him outside the universi-ty (7)4 If I were present, a

military man, but as it is,just a joiner (6)5 Seaside feature is a

cover for illegal activities(5)6 A large kangaroo, a

new Guinea weapon (9)7 Something palatable

came from the weddingof Catherine the Great, ablessed event (7)11 Timing the assemblyafter dark (5-4)13 Be glad about saidlady (7)15 Fluster charactersbecoming promotive ofrelaxation (7)16 New sun due (6)18 English composerpossibly lost by the hos-pital (5)19 Water creature seenin first routemarch (5)22 See 17 Across

Last weeks SolutionAcross: 1 Itch, 3 Lacrosse, 9 Prosper, 10 Flute, 11 Rodeo,12 Uneven, 14 Across, 16 Endear, 19 Anchor, 21 Vests, 24Bulge, 25 Tactile, 26 Disaster, 27 Wept. Down: 1 Imperial, 2 Cloud, 4 Airbus, 5 Rifle, 6 Shut-eye,7 Eden, 8 Aprons, 13 Crescent, 15 Rankles, 17 Novice,18 Writhe, 20 Heels, 22 Spire, 23 Abed.

DOUBLE CROSS-WORDSolve the Double Cross-Word puzzle using either the

standard or cryptic clues, the answers are exactly the same.

2 letter words AnAtDoIsItOfOnWe

3 letter words AirAnyAskAspAteGasLadOld

PlySeaSumYou

4 letter words AtomBodeByteCowsCystDuneGlib

KneeLazeLeekMoanOozePenn

SeatSiamSofaSuetTile

TogaToss

5 letter words Alley

KeyedSpeedSteep

7 letter words EarnestEpitomeEyesorePartial

FILL IT INComplete the crossword grid by using the given words:

Across 1 Spans (5)4 Warts (5)6 Tan (3)7 Pills (5)8 On cue (5)

10 Apt (3)12 Aide (4)14 Apes (4)15 A riot (5)16 Tern (4)

18 Late (4)20 Cat (3)22 Dingo (5)23 Manor (5)24 Are (3)25 Sages (5)26 Plead (5)Down 2 Aries (5)3 Last (4)4 Opts (4)

5 Anger (5)7 Strider (7)9 Nearest (7)

11 Tacit (5)13 Tar (3)14 Top (3)17 Snail (5)19 Media (5)20 Sage (4)21 Rapt (4)

QUICKIE

Last weeks SolutionAcross: 1 Waits, 4 Seals, 7 Drama, 8 Error, 9Difference, 11 Quarrelled, 15 Alive, 16 Scene, 17 Heels,18 Rates. Down: 1 Wide, 2 Imaginative, 3 Staff, 4 Swear, 5Arrangement, 6 Sorted, 10 Squash, 12 Reeds, 13 Loser,14 Less.

Across 1 Spoons (8)7 Humo (de fuego, cigarro)(5)8 Aubergine (9)9 Ojo (3)10 Years (4)11 Skirts (6)13 Dessert (6)14 Scarce (reserves,resources) (6)17 Paths (6)18 Peine (4)20 Spanish high speedtrain (abb) (3)22 In love (with a person)(9)23 Tallos (de flores) (5)24 Globos (de aire) (8)

Down 1 Goat (5)2 Zanahorias (7)3 Tía (4)4 In addition (6)5 Zorros (5)6 Straight (direction) (7)7 Serrín (7)

12 French (7)13 Paradise (7)15 Aguacate (7)16 Plátano (6)17 Siete (5)19 Libros (5)21 Herramienta (4)

SPANISH-ENGLISH CROSSWORDImprove your Spanish - clues in Spanish, answers inEnglish or vice versa.

STANDARD CLUESAcross1 Imbibes (7)5 Allegory (5)8 Supposed (5)9 Sentry (7)10 Emotion (9)12 Recede (3)13 Government (6)14 Make (6)17/22 Travel weariness(3,3)18 Perception after thefact (9)20 Spears of frozenwater (7)21 Pieces of paper (5)23 Wield (5)

24 Enjoyment (7)Down1 Crypts (5)2 Legume (3)3 Light metal (7)4 Join metal (6)5 Face (5)6 Throwing stick (9)7 Edible (7)11 Hours of darkness (5-4)13 Celebrate (7)15 Soothing (7)16 Brand new (6)18 Famous composer(5)19 Fish (5)22 See 17 Across

In this week’s Quickie crossword, all the answers areANAGRAMS of the clue words:

33Friday, May 13, 2011Across 7 From the French for ‘on equal terms’, what name is givento a young foreigner who lives with a family in return fordoing light housework? (2,4)8 Which is the southernmost country of Central America?

(6)10 By what name is a solemn procession, especially for afuneral, normally known? (7)11 Formed in London in 1989, which alternative rock band’smost prominent early line-up featured singer BrettAnderson, guitarist Bernard Butler, bass player Mat Osmanand drummer Simon Gilbert? (5)12 What can be either a ‘dance originating in the US in the1930s and 1940s’ or ‘a coarse kind of cut tobacco’? (4)13 Which rock group’s first Britishhit single was Seven Seas ofRhye? (5)17 Which small Old World thrushrelated to the chats, typically has abrown back with red on the breast?(5)18 What is the name of the centralpart of a church building, intendedto accommodate most of the con-gregation? (4)22 Which city is the capital ofMorocco? (5)23 In which 1988 film did Dustin Hoffman play Tom Cruise’sautistic brother Raymond? (4,3)24 In which town in southwest-central Georgia was formerUS president Jimmy Carter born? (6)

25 By what other name is the chess piece the rook alsoknown? (6)Down 1 What was the title of Émile Zola’s celebrated 1898 articleon the Dreyfus affair? (7)

2 What name is given to the small pouch worn around thewaist so as to hang in front of the kilt as part of men’sScottish Highland dress? (7)3 What is the name given to a

female fox? (5)4 Which plant with white flowers

and aromatic leaves that are eithercrinkly or flat is used as a culinaryherb and for garnishing food? (7)

5 What is the surname of thesinging partner of Daryl Hall? (5)

6 Which French painter’s mostfamous works included Dejeunersur l’herbe, Olympia and A Bar attheFolies-Bergeree? (5)

9 What word means ‘of, relating to, or consisting ofmoney’? (9)14 What is the surname of the English-born Americanauthor of a series of children’s classics about Dr Dolittle?(7)15 Which large extinct hairy elephant of the Pleistoceneepoch had a sloping back and long curved tusks? (7)16 Which cartoonist illustrated Lewis Carroll’s Alice’sAdventures in Wonderland and Through the LookingGlass? (7)19 What is the name given to an underground room or vaultbeneath a church, used as a chapel or burial place? (5)20 What name was given to a German submarine used inthe First or Second World War? (1-4)21 Which Super League team are known as the Warriors?(5)

Quiz Word

Last weeks Quiz WordsolutionAcross: 1 Skiff, 4 Acacia, 9 Upstage, 10 Shaft, 11 Sony,12 Treacle, 13 CIA, 14 Apia, 16 Tara, 18 See, 20 Sackbut,21 Mayo, 24 Triad, 25 Elysium, 26 Elijah, 27 Eliot. Down: 1 Squash, 2 Ibsen, 3 Fiat, 5 Cassette, 6 Chaucer,7 Antler, 8 Vesta, 13 Cambodia, 15 Puccini, 17 Tsetse, 18Steer, 19 Bon mot, 22 Alibi, 23 Tyne.

SUDOKU SALLY’S SIMPLE SPANISH

Last Week’s Solutions

Code Cracker

Soduko Span - Eng Quizword Fill It In

1. Who played the role of the pawnbroker in the film'Pawnbroker'?2. Who did Michael Caine play in the "Ipcress File"?3. Who or what was Skippy ( on TV )?4. What was James Bond's father's name?5. Marilyn Monroe was the model for which DisneyCharacter?6. Who steals the Pink Panther in the original film?7. Maurice Micklewhite became famous as who?8. Natasha Gurdin became famous as who?9. Who played the girl on the motorcycle in a film of samename?10. Margie Belcher provided the body movements forwhich character?11. Who played the Fugitive?12. Ben Veeren played what character in Arthur Hailey'sRoots?13. Which country made the world's first feature film in1906?

ANSWERS1. Rod Stiger 2. Harry Palmer 3. The Bush Kangaroo 4.Andrew 5. Tinker Bell 6. The Phantom 7. Michael Caine 8.Natalie Wood 9. Marianne Faithful 10. Disney's SnowWhite 11. David Jason 12. Chicken George 13. Australia,the film was the 'Story of the Kelly Gang.'

movies/tv QUIZ

Match these words with their Spanish translations then find them in the wordsearch. (Answers below)

Colores - Colours

C T I Z C O U N B X A L O B YE T S E L E C E Y D U N J A WO S C U R O I N L Z G O O P LG R A I X G I A A M Y R R H IR K R T E U R O T L WR I Y LT B R WA E R U S J B A U S AE U WG M L V E A C V M X K XU P R S E I P D A S V E J H EG S E Q O M A F I N E O R O HB U C L U R E V Z A WT J D NB S E I O E A M A R I L L O ES T C M T X S O R A L C Y U GA S C K F H E A WN D U A U RF G U C S P M B B J J A G I OC I E E R O S A V A V WS V G

AMARILLOAZULBEIGE

BLANCOCAFE

CELESTECLARO

ESMERALDAGRISLILA

MARRON

MORADANARANJANEGROORO

OSCUROPLATAROJOROSA

TURQUESAVERDE

VIOLETA

1. AMARILLO, 2. AZUL,

3. BEIGE, 4. BLANCO, 5.CAFE,

6.CELESTE, 7.CLARO,

8.ESMERALDA, 9.GRIS,

10.LILA, 11.MARRON,

12.MORADA, 13.NARANJA,

14.NEGRO, 15.ORO,

16.OSCURO, 17.PLATA,

18.ROJO, 19.ROSA,

20.TURQUESA, 21.VERDE,

22.VIOLETA

a. blue, b. pink, c. yellow,

d. white, e. violet, f. green,

g. beige, h. turquoise,

i. sky blue, j. light, k. orange,

l. silver, m. red, n. grey,

o. black, p. dark, q. coffee

coloured, r. emerald green,

s. lilac, t. brown, u. purple,

v. gold.

Answers: 1c, 2a, 3g, 4d, 5q, 6i,7j, 8r, 9n, 10s, 11t, 12u, 13k, 14o,15v, 16p, 17l, 18m, 19b, 20h, 21f,22e.

34 Friday, May 13, 2011

HoroscopesBy Pandora

Aries March 21 - April 19 Damage caused by rage might cost youaround €250 this weekend. Avoid poshbars. The best of excuses are those thatare plausible (so, not ones that involveyou, super-powers and hordes of sexyfriends).

Taurus April 20 - May 20 With all you've been through you shouldbe glad that this week will actually cometo a close. Banking on anyone this week?Don't let them let you down like they didme. I'm still picking up the pieces of a tat-tered life.

Gemini May 21 - June 20You may be better off taking charge ofyour own laundry today for reasons thatthe stars do not make clear. Many of yourhang-ups would disappear if you startedwearing clothes that more suited you.

Cancer June 21 - July 22Placing your mouth around the exhaust ofa car stuck in traffic is bound to causemore traffic problems. Please take intoconsideration the needs of others.

Leo July 23 - August 22You will find you get better sex advice ifyou stop talking to what you call "littlepeople" in your nearby park. You're doingreally well, keep it up!

Your footsteps will seem louder today asyou break in new shoes. However, thiswill not be a metaphorical sign of any-thing greater. Heavy drinking can lead toa certain number of social problems.

Libra September 23 - October 22Your mind is filled with thoughts of sexualinadequacy and hey, maybe you're right.Night terrors will plague you throughoutthis month and you may feel that people,both living and dead, are out to get you.

Scorpio October 23 - November 21Test yourself, know your limits! Your abilityto perform open heart surgery may bebrought into question today as you attemptto help an asthmatic in the local park that’shaving breathing difficulties.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21Everything you have been taught will beforgotten in a crazy moment of rashbehaviour. All the things you're unsure ofwill almost certainly remain enigmatic bythe end of the day.

Capricorn December 22 - January 19This month provides you with the great-est chance of making it. So pray to theplanets that they stay in alignment orthese horoscopes will not be fulfilled.

Aquarius January 20 - February 18Your friends won't forgive you if you don'ttake the opportunity you are presentedwith. The very thought of coming up witha horoscope for you made me laugh.

Pisces February 19 - March 20Pickles are a source of joy for you this week.Your brain is overflowing with ideas, some ofwhich are truly brilliant and you must focuson making your dreams a reality. Ten weeksof doing what you do best, and you're still nocloser to achieving your goal.

Virgo August 23 - September 22

I DON’T WANTTO BE ALONE

Dear Tia MariaI have just finished a relation-ship with my boyfriend who Ihave been seeing for 4 years.Over the last couple of yearswe have been living together.

We did split up about 18months ago and got backtogether after I had managedto get my own place. Life withme is complicated and I amvery jealous, I hate it if we areout and another girl talks tohim and I think this is whathas finally pushed him away. Ijust feel so alone and that I

can’t move on. When he waswith me he was not very nicebut I would always think wellit’s better than being alone,now I believe that more thanever. What am I going to doas I feel that now my life is notworth living!Sophie x

Hi SophieThis sounds like it hasbeen a difficult relationshipfor a while; you say thatyou feel your life is notworth living, I am sorryabout this as your life wasnot so great when yourman was in it. You need togive your new life a chanceat what it could be like with-out the negativity of a part-ner who is not particularlynice. You say you havebeen jealous in this rela-tionship that puts a lot ofpressure on you when yougo out, try going out nowas a single woman and seewhat a good time you couldhave. I think maybe youshould get some relation-ship help as you need tolearn how to control yourjealousy as this could ruinnew relationships to come,this could be a very posi-tive thing as you could dis-cover how not to be in anabusive relationship andhow a relationship shouldbe fun and exciting. Good luck Tia Maria

ADDICTED TOTHE ‘NET

Dear Tia MariaI have a serious problemthat is ruining my life, I keepwriting every single move Imake on Facebook. I com-ment on everything, evenwhen my boyfriend and Iargue, I even ask him whathe wants for tea on it if weare not in the same room!My friends never ring and

ask me what I am doing asthey say they don’t need toand they don’t want to goout with me as I am alwaysupdating my status as to,where I am, who I am withand what we are doing!Sometimes I get drunk whenI go out and update my sta-tus without even remember-ing!!! How can I stop this!

Alexis

Hi AlexisThese things always startoff as a bit of fun, but theycan take over before younotice it. You have to thinkwhat is more importantyour friendships or yourFacebook status? When something starts toaffect your relationships ithas then become a prob-lem. You need to thinkabout how you can stopthis behaviour. First thingthat would maybe a goodidea maybe is to take offthe face book applicationon your phone; this is cut-ting down an access. Ask for support from yourfriends and partner. Admityou need support and seehow they think they couldhelp. You may also needto have so addiction thera-py if you feel that thisFacebooking is way out ofhand. There are many sup-port systems out thereyou just need to accessthem. I would be more thanhappy to recommendsome to you.Take care for now,Tia Maria


WHAT’S ON THE TELLY..?

BBC 1 Sunday, May 15th, 9:00pm to 11:10pmEccentric Captain Sparrow is on a mission to rescue the Governor’s beautifuldaughter, Elizabeth, and his ship, the Black Pearl, both of which have been capturedby curse-ridden pirate, Captain Barbossa. They brave the deadly seas and headtowards the mysterious Isla de Muerta in an attempt to stop the skeleton piratesfrom spilling Elizabeth's blood to lift the curse that keeps them in limbo.

The Graham Norton Show

BBC 1 May 13th 11:35pm to 00:20amUnique talk show with award-winning host, Graham Norton. Expect the unexpectedas top celebrity guests join in the fun with Graham and his irrepressible audience.Graham is joined by Lady Gaga as she performs two numbers - Judas and BornThis Way - and showcases some spectacular costumes. Plus comedian JasonByrne and Oscar-winning actor Geoffrey Rush star of The King's Speech and newfilm Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides.

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (Film, 2003)

ITV1 Monday, May 16th, 10:00pm to 11:00pm Documentary series following inmates andstaff at Manchester's Strangeways prison.This episode focuses on the healthcare unitat Strangeways, and it is the first time thatsuch access has been given to what is oneof the most challenging and sensitive areasin the prison. The most disruptive prisoner,David Charlton, is often a resident here ashe cannot function in the normal wings.Charlton is abusive to staff and frequentlysoils his cell, but despite all this, he regardsStrangeways as his home and commitsoffences to get back into prison. Staff mustalso deal with a violent inmate who hasbeen brought in after clubbing a prison offi-cer over the head.

Strangeways (Documentary, 2011)

The Untold Battle of BritainChannel 4 Saturday, May 14th, 9:00pm to10:00pmThis dramatised documentary recountshow, during the most decisive phase ofthe Battle of Britain, a single squadron of34 Polish fighter pilots wreaked havoc onthe Luftwaffe, overturning RAF prejudicesand helping to change the course of histo-ry. Based on a diary kept by the pilots ofthe squadron, it is a story of increasingfrustration on the part of the Poles whohad already fought the Luftwaffe and nowfound themselves having to learn Englishand the RAF way of doing things. By thetime the Battle of Britain was won, theyhad claimed 126 enemy planes. But as thewar ended, their joy turned to despair asthey saw their own country handed toStalin.

36

00:35 This Week01:25 The Death of Bin Laden -Panorama01:55 Countryfile02:55 Antiques Roadshow03:55 Neighbourhood Watched04:40 Our World05:00 BBC News05:30 Hard Talk06:00 The World Today06:30 World Business Report07:00 Breakfast10:15 Missing 201111:00 Homes Under the Hammer12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom12:45 Cash in the Attic13:15 Bargain Hunt14:00 BBC News; Weather14:30 Regional News and Weather14:45 Doctors15:15 Escape to the Country16:00 BBC News; Weather;Regional News16:05 Copycats16:40 Wingin' It17:00 Remote Control Star17:30 All Over the Place18:00 Newsround18:15 Weakest Link19:00 BBC News19:30 Regional News Programmes20:00 The One Show21:00 EastEnders21:30 The Comedy Genius of JohnSullivan22:00 Have I Got News for You22:30 Outnumbered23:00 BBC News23:25 Regional News and Weather23:35 The Graham Norton Show

BBC2

00:20 Business Nightmares withEvan Davis01:20 Children's CraniofacialSurgery02:20 BBC News02:30 ABC World News withCharles Gibson03:00 BBC News03:30 The Record04:00 BBC News04:30 Our World04:40 Close

07:00 Wibbly Pig07:10 Penelope07:15 Toddworld07:30 Tinga Tinga Tales07:45 Charlie and Lola08:00 Natural Born Hunters08:25 Newsround08:30 Trust Me I'm a Genie08:40 League of Super Evil08:50 Frankenstein's Cat09:00 Wait for It!09:30 LazyTown09:55 Bob the Builder10:05 The Koala Brothers10:15 Guess with Jess10:30 Big & Small10:40 Buzz and Tell10:45 Big Cook Little Cook11:05 Timmy Time11:20 Nuzzle and Scratch11:45 Waybuloo12:05 In the Night Garden12:35 The Pink Panther Show13:00 Daily Politics13:30 GMT with George Alagiah14:00 Diagnosis Murder14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy15:15 Real Rescues16:00 Flog It!16:30 Put Your Money Where YourMouth Is17:30 Pointless18:15 Show Me the Monet19:00 Eggheads19:30 Great British Menu20:00 Windfarm Wars21:00 Gardeners' World21:30 An Education23:00 Later with Jools Holland23:30 Newsnight

00:35 The Last Word01:05 Grimefighters01:30 The Zone03:35 Human Rights and Wrongs:Tonight04:00 ITV Nightscreen05:35 Jeremy Kyle: MorningSurgery06:30 ITV Morning News07:00 Daybreak09:30 Lorraine10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show11:30 This Morning13:30 Loose Women14:30 ITV News and Weather14:55 Meridian News and Weather15:00 60 Minute Makeover16:00 The Alan Titchmarsh Show16:59 Meridian Weather17:00 Midsomer Murders18:00 Britain's Best Dish19:00 Meridian Tonight19:30 ITV News and Weather20:00 Emmerdale20:30 Coronation Street21:00 Baboons with Bill Bailey21:30 Coronation Street22:00 Paul O'Grady Live23:00 ITV News at Ten andWeather23:30 Meridian Tonight andWeather23:35 The Cube

00:45 The Big Bang Theory01:15 The JD Set: Manchester01:30 Album Chart ShowIntroduces - Jamie Woon01:45 4Play: Oh Land02:00 The Model Agency02:55 Supersize vs SuperskinnyKids03:50 A Year Inside Number 1004:45 Hill Street Blues05:35 Great British Brands05:50 Wogan's Perfect Recall06:15 Countdown07:00 The Treacle People07:10 The Hoobs08:00 Freshly Squeezed08:25 Everybody Loves Raymond08:55 Frasier09:25 Friends09:55 Jo Frost: Extreme ParentalGuidance10:55 Relocation, Relocation11:55 A Place by the Sea13:00 Channel 4 News Summary13:05 Make Do & Mend13:35 Jamie at Home14:05 Channel 4 Racing16:10 Countdown17:00 Deal or No Deal18:00 Come Dine with Me19:00 The Simpsons19:30 Hollyoaks20:00 Channel 4 News20:25 Unreported World20:55 4thought.tv21:00 A Place in the Sun22:00 The Million Pound Drop Live23:25 That Peter Kay Thing23:55 PhoneShop

00:05 Banged Up Abroad01:05 SuperCasino05:05 Meals in Moments05:15 How Not to Decorate05:55 County Secrets06:10 Wildlife SOS06:35 House Doctor07:00 Thomas & Friends07:10 The Beeps07:20 The Adventures of Bottle TopBill and His Best Friend Corky07:35 Bert and Ernie's GreatAdventures07:40 Rupert Bear07:50 Peppa Pig07:55 Milkshake! Music Box08:00 Little Princess08:15 The Mr Men Show08:30 Thomas & Friends08:45 Make Way for Noddy09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots09:15 Peppa Pig09:30 Roary the Racing Car09:40 Olivia09:50 The WotWots10:00 Ben and Holly's LittleKingdom10:15 The Wright Stuff12:05 Extreme Fishing with RobsonGreen13:05 Meals in Moments13:10 5 News Lunchtime13:20 Law & Order14:15 Home and Away14:45 Neighbours15:15 The Vanessa Show16:05 Chinese Food in Minutes16:10 Perfect Romance18:00 5 News at 518:30 Neighbours19:00 Home and Away19:25 OK! TV20:00 5 News at 720:30 Fifth Gear21:00 Ice Road Truckers22:00 The Mentalist23:00 Law & Order23:55 The Walking Dead

Friday13th May

THE COMEDYGENIUS OF JOHN

SULLIVANA tribute to the TV comedy writer, who diedlast month, leaving behind such favouritesas Only Fools and Horses, Just GoodFriends, Citizen Smith, Roger Roger andDear John.

00:20 The National Lottery FridayNight Draws00:30 The One Show01:30 The Best Man03:05 The Hairy Bikers: MumsKnow Best04:05 The Boat That Guy Built04:35 Great British RailwayJourneys05:05 BBC News05:30 Five Minutes With06:00 BBC News07:00 Breakfast11:00 Saturday Kitchen Live12:30 Great British Menu13:00 BBC News; Regional Newsand Weather13:15 Football Focus14:00 Olympic Dreams14:30 Cash in the Celebrity Attic15:15 Bargain Hunt Famous Finds16:00 Father of the Bride17:40 Don't Scare the Hare18:15 BBC News; Regional Newsand Weather18:30 So You Think You Can DanceLive19:30 Doctor Who20:20 So You Think You Can Dance20:50 The National Lottery SaturdayNight Draws21:00 Eurovision Song Contest2011

BBC2

00:00 The Review Show00:50 Later with Jools Holland01:55 Sugarhouse03:25 BBC News03:30 The Weather Show04:00 BBC News04:30 Click04:45 Newswatch05:00 BBC News05:05 Close07:00 Wibbly Pig

07:10 Penelope07:15 Toddworld07:25 Tinga Tinga Tales07:40 Octonauts: Creature Reports07:45 Charlie and Lola08:00 One Minute Wonders08:25 Arthur08:50 Shaun the Sheep09:00 Fee Fi Fo Yum09:30 Prank Patrol Down Under09:55 Sam & Mark's Guide toDodging Disaster10:00 Dick & Dom Go Wild10:30 Serious Explorers:Livingstone11:00 Relic: Guardians of theMuseum11:30 League of Super Evil11:40 Wolverine and the X-Men12:00 Mortified12:25 OOglies12:40 MOTD Kickabout13:00 The Spanish Main14:35 Battle Cry17:00 Two Greedy Italians18:00 Flog It!18:45 Dad's Army19:15 The Comedy Genius of JohnSullivan19:45 Citizen Smith20:15 The Two Ronnies21:00 Domesday22:00 Have I Got a Bit More Newsfor You22:45 Blood Diamond

00:35 Take Me Out01:30 The Zone03:35 In Plain Sight04:20 ITV Nightscreen06:30 ITV Morning News07:00 Mini CITV08:25 CITV09:25 House Gift10:25 Coronation Street12:45 This Morning: Saturday13:45 ITV News and Weather13:59 Meridian Weather14:00 Live FA Cup Final18:30 Meridian News and Weather18:45 ITV News and Weather19:00 New Animals Do the FunniestThings20:00 Sing If You Can21:00 Britain's Got Talent22:00 Piers Morgan's Life Stories:John Prescott23:00 ITV News and Weather23:14 Meridian Weather23:15 FA Cup Final Highlights

00:30 The Ricky Gervais Show01:00 Mercury Prize Sessions01:20 Album Chart Show01:35 My Name Is Earl02:30 Supersize vs SuperskinnyKids03:25 Enough03:30 Whatever Turns You On03:35 Night Walking03:40 Laid Off03:55 Ugly Betty04:40 Hill Street Blues05:30 Wogan's Perfect Recall06:00 Countdown06:45 Yo Gabba Gabba!07:10 The Hoobs07:35 That Paralympic Show08:00 FIM Superbike WorldChampionship08:25 British Formula FordChampionship08:55 The Morning Line09:55 Friends10:25 Koko Pop11:00 The Saturdays11:20 Glee12:45 Friends13:20 The Saturdays: What Goeson Tour13:40 The Big Bang Theory14:15 That Paralympic Show14:50 Channel 4 Racing17:00 Come Dine with Me DownUnder19:30 Channel 4 News19:55 4thought.tv20:00 The Restoration Man21:00 The Untold Battle of Britain22:00 The Million Pound Drop Live23:20 Stand Up for the Week

00:55 Cops in Crisis01:15 SuperCasino05:05 Motorsport Mundial05:30 Fifth Gear05:55 County Secrets06:10 Wildlife SOS06:35 House Doctor07:00 Peppa Pig07:05 Roary the Racing Car07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots07:25 Fireman Sam07:35 Miss Spider's Sunny PatchFriends07:50 The Beeps08:05 Chiro08:15 Harry and His Bucket Full ofDinosaurs08:25 Noddy in Toyland08:40 Hana's Helpline09:00 Little Princess09:10 The Adventures of Bottle TopBill and His Best Friend Corky09:25 Mist: Sheepdog Tales09:45 Rupert Bear10:00 Olivia10:15 The Mr Men Show10:30 Gerald McBoing Boing11:00 Animal Rescue Squad11:20 The Gadget Show12:20 The Green Berets15:05 Mystery Woman: In theShadows16:50 Murder 101: College Can BeMurder18:30 Major Dundee20:55 5 News Weekend21:00 NCIS22:00 CSI: NY23:00 CSI: Miami

37

DOMESDAY

Historian Stephen Baxter explores his owntheory that the Domesday Book was com-missioned to confer revolutionary powers onthe monarchy in the 11th century, and notintended as a means to collect taxes. Heexamines how the first great national survey,which recorded who owned every piece ofland and property in England, was a massivelogistical exercise that documented the trau-matic impact of the Norman Conquest.

Saturday14th May

38

Sunday15th May

00:15 National Lottery Update00:35 Match of the Day01:35 Black Sheep03:00 BBC News03:30 HARDtalk04:00 BBC News04:30 Our World05:00 BBC News05:30 Click06:00 BBC News06:30 The Record Europe07:00 Breakfast08:55 Match of the Day10:00 The Andrew Marr Show11:00 The Big Questions12:00 Country Tracks13:00 The Politics Show14:00 EastEnders15:55 Bargain Hunt16:20 Escape to the Country17:20 Life of Riley17:50 Lifeline18:00 Points of View18:15 Songs of Praise18:50 BBC News; Regional Newsand Weather19:10 Land Girls20:00 Countryfile21:00 Pirates of the Caribbean: theCurse of the Black Pearl23:10 BBC News; Regional Newsand Weather23:35 Meet the Multiples

BBC2

01:00 Later with Jools Holland02:05 The Hotel New Hampshire03:50 Close07:00 Wibbly Pig07:10 Penelope07:15 Toddworld07:25 Tinga Tinga Tales07:40 Octonauts: Creature Reports07:45 Charlie and Lola08:00 Space Hoppers08:25 Arthur08:50 Shaun the Sheep09:00 Fee Fi Fo Yum09:30 Gimme a Break10:00 Friday Download11:00 Live Athletics13:00 World Olympic Dreams13:30 Live MotoGP15:00 Live Swimming16:30 Live Athletics18:05 McLintock!20:10 Richard Hammond'sEngineering Connections21:00 Britain's Secret Seas22:00 Operation Crossbow23:00 Match of the Day 2

00:15 The Enforcer02:15 The Zone04:15 Swingtown05:05 ITV Nightscreen06:30 ITV Morning News07:00 Mini CITV08:25 CITV09:25 May the Best House Win10:25 Dickinson's Real Deal11:25 Sing If You Can12:30 This Morning: Sunday13:30 Dinner Date14:25 ITV News and Weather14:39 Meridian Weather14:40 Columbo: Dead Weight16:10 Britain's Got Talent17:10 The Spy Who Loved Me19:30 Meridian News and Weather19:45 ITV News and Weather20:00 The Cube21:00 Vera23:00 ITV News at Ten andWeather23:14 Meridian Weather23:15 Perspectives: Hugh LaurieDown by the River

00:10 Epic Movie01:50 Supersize vs SuperskinnyKids02:45 The Dead Zone03:25 The Astronomer's Sun03:35 Tomorrow03:40 The Cooler05:20 Wild Thing I Love You06:15 Countdown07:00 Sali Mali07:05 The Hoobs07:30 The Grid08:00 Freesports on 408:25 The Saturdays: What Goeson Tour08:45 Hollyoaks11:15 The Saturdays: What Goeson Tour11:35 Being N-Dubz in America andBeyond12:10 The Saturdays: What Goeson Tour12:30 Glee13:50 The Simpsons14:55 Celebrity Coach Trip17:30 Deal or No Deal: Banker'sBirthday18:30 Time Team19:30 Channel 4 News19:55 4thought.tv20:00 Come Dine with Me21:00 The Hotel22:00 Die Hard 4.0

00:00 CSI: Crime SceneInvestigation01:00 SuperCasino05:00 Rough Guide to Beaches05:10 Nick's Quest05:35 HouseBusters06:00 Hana's Helpline06:10 The Milkshake! Show06:35 Thomas & Friends06:45 Roary the Racing Car07:00 Peppa Pig07:05 Roary the Racing Car07:15 Fifi and the Flowertots07:25 Fireman Sam07:35 Miss Spider's Sunny PatchFriends07:50 The Beeps08:00 Mio Mao08:10 Chiro08:15 Harry and His Bucket Full ofDinosaurs08:25 Bert and Ernie's GreatAdventures08:30 Noddy in Toyland08:45 Hana's Helpline08:55 Milkshake! Music Box09:00 Little Princess09:15 The Adventures of Bottle TopBill and His Best Friend Corky09:25 Mist: Sheepdog Tales09:45 Rupert Bear10:00 Olivia10:15 The Mr Men Show10:30 Gerald McBoing Boing11:00 Family Food Fight11:30 OK! TV Sunday12:30 The Hotel Inspector13:30 Extreme Fishing with RobsonGreen - At the Ends of the Earth14:30 Ice Road Truckers15:35 Gunsmoke17:10 5 News Weekend17:20 Are We Done Yet?19:05 Zathura: a Space Adventure21:10 Practical Magic23:00 The Walking Dead

OPERATIONCROSSBOW

Documentary providing an insight into a lit-tle-known story of Spitfire pilots and Alliedtechnicians whose work helped to thwart theNazis during the Second World War. Theprogramme reveals how stereoscopic 3Dphotographs were used to help interpretersmap every contour of the enemy's territory.

39

Monday16th May

00:35 The Night Listener01:55 The Apprentice02:55 MasterChef03:55 Holby City04:55 Churches: How to ReadThem05:25 BBC News05:30 HARDtalk06:00 BBC News06:30 World Business Report06:45 BBC News07:00 Breakfast10:15 Fake Britain11:00 Homes Under the Hammer12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom12:45 Cash in the Attic13:15 Bargain Hunt14:00 BBC News; Weather14:30 Regional News and Weather14:45 Doctors15:15 Escape to the Country16:00 BBC News; Weather16:05 Copycats16:35 Sam & Mark's Guide toDodging Disaster16:40 Wingin' It17:00 Sadie J17:30 Blue Peter18:00 Newsround18:15 Weakest Link19:00 BBC News19:30 Regional News Programmes20:00 The One Show20:30 Saints and Scroungers21:00 EastEnders21:30 Track My Trash: Panorama22:00 The Street That CutEverything23:00 BBC News23:25 Regional News and Weather23:35 The Street That CutEverything

BBC2

00:20 The Shadow Line01:20 On a Clear Day02:55 Reporters03:00 BBC News03:30 Dateline London04:00 BBC News04:30 The Record Europe05:00 The Super League Show05:30 Close07:00 Wibbly Pig

07:10 Penelope07:15 Toddworld07:30 Tinga Tinga Tales07:40 Octonauts: Creature Reports07:45 Charlie and Lola08:00 Natural Born Hunters08:25 Newsround08:30 Trust Me I'm a Genie08:40 League of Super Evil08:50 Frankenstein's Cat09:00 Wait for It!09:30 LazyTown09:55 Bob the Builder:10:05 The Koala Brothers10:20 Guess with Jess10:35 Big & Small10:45 Buzz and Tell10:50 Big Cook Little Cook11:10 Timmy Time11:20 Nuzzle and Scratch11:45 Waybuloo12:05 In the Night Garden12:35 The Pink Panther Show13:00 Daily Politics13:30 GMT with George Alagiah14:00 Diagnosis Murder14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy15:15 Animal 24:716:00 Helicopter Heroes16:45 Flog It!17:30 Pointless18:15 Show Me the Monet19:00 Eggheads19:30 Great British Menu20:00 The Story of Ireland21:00 Business Nightmares withEvan Davis22:00 Children's CraniofacialSurgery23:00 Never Mind the Buzzcocks23:30 Newsnight

00:15 Surgery School01:15 Premiership Rugby Union01:55 The Zone03:00 Motorsport UK03:55 ITV Nightscreen06:30 ITV Morning News07:00 Daybreak09:30 Lorraine10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show11:30 This Morning13:30 Loose Women14:30 ITV News and Weather14:55 Meridian News and Weather15:00 60 Minute Makeover16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal16:59 Meridian Weather17:00 Midsomer Murders18:00 Britain's Best Dish19:00 Meridian Tonight19:30 ITV News and Weather20:00 Emmerdale20:30 Coronation Street21:00 The Dales21:30 Coronation Street22:00 Strangeways23:00 ITV News at Ten andWeather23:30 Meridian Tonight andWeather23:35 A Perfect Murder

00:30 The Business02:15 The Dead Zone03:00 Civilization: Is the WestHistory?03:55 Hill Street Blues04:45 Wild Thing I Love You05:45 Wogan's Perfect Recall06:10 Countdown06:55 Sali Mali07:00 The Treacle People07:10 The Hoobs08:00 Freshly Squeezed08:30 Everybody Loves Raymond08:55 Frasier09:25 Friends09:55 Jo Frost: Extreme ParentalGuidance10:55 Relocation, Relocation11:55 A Place by the Sea13:00 Channel 4 News Summary13:05 Jamie at Home13:35 River Cottage Bites13:40 Distant Drums15:40 Baking Mad with Eric Lanlard16:10 Countdown17:00 Deal or No Deal18:00 Come Dine with Me19:00 The Simpsons19:30 Hollyoaks20:00 Channel 4 News20:55 4thought.tv21:00 Dispatches: The Truth AboutGoing Under the Knife22:00 Gordon's Great Escape23:00 The Sixth Sense

00:05 House on Haunted Hill01:50 SuperCasino05:00 Rough Guide to Cities05:10 Divine Designs06:00 Hana's Helpline06:10 The Milkshake! Show06:35 Thomas & Friends06:45 Roary the Racing Car07:00 Thomas & Friends07:10 The Beeps07:20 The Adventures of Bottle TopBill and His Best Friend Corky07:35 Bert and Ernie's GreatAdventures07:40 Rupert Bear07:50 Peppa Pig07:55 Milkshake! Music Box08:00 Little Princess08:15 The Mr Men Show08:30 Thomas & Friends08:45 Make Way for Noddy09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots09:15 Peppa Pig09:30 Roary the Racing Car09:40 Olivia09:50 The WotWots10:00 Ben and Holly's LittleKingdom10:15 The Wright Stuff12:05 Warship13:05 The Family Recipe13:10 5 News Lunchtime13:15 Law & Order14:15 Home and Away14:45 Neighbours15:15 The Vanessa Show16:05 Chinese Food in Minutes16:10 Returning Lily18:00 5 News at 518:30 Neighbours19:00 Home and Away19:25 OK! TV20:00 5 News at 720:30 How Do They Do It?21:00 The Gadget Show22:00 The Hotel Inspector23:00 There's Something AboutJosie

THE STORY OFIRELAND

New series. Fergal Keane explores Ireland'scultural, economic and social history, docu-menting its role on the international stage.He begins by revisiting the origins of theCeltic people, detailing the impact ofChristianity and monasticism, the emergen-ce of early literature, and the formation oflaw tracts that provide an insight into theday-to-day life of people nearly 1,500 yearsago.

40

Tuesday17th May

00:05 The Graham Norton Show00:50 Churchill: the HollywoodYears02:15 The Apprentice03:15 Arena: Produced by GeorgeMartin04:45 MasterChef05:45 HARDtalk06:00 BBC News06:30 World Business Report06:45 BBC News07:00 Breakfast10:15 Fake Britain11:00 Homes Under the Hammer12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom12:45 Cash in the Attic13:15 Bargain Hunt14:00 BBC News; Weather14:30 Regional News and Weather14:45 Doctors15:15 Escape to the Country16:00 BBC News; Weather16:05 Copycats16:35 Sam & Mark's Guide toDodging Disaster16:40 Wingin' It17:00 Sadie J17:30 Blue Peter18:00 Newsround18:15 Weakest Link19:00 BBC News19:30 Regional News Programmes20:00 The One Show20:30 EastEnders21:00 Holby City22:00 Crimewatch23:00 BBC News23:25 Regional News and Weather23:35 Crimewatch Update23:45 See You in Court

BBC2

00:20 Richard Hammond'sEngineering Connections01:10 BBC News01:30 HARDtalk02:00 BBC News02:30 ABC World News03:00 BBC News03:30 Reporters04:00 BBC News04:30 Our World05:00 BBC News05:05 Close

07:00 Wibbly Pig07:10 Penelope07:15 Toddworld07:30 Tinga Tinga Tales07:40 Octonauts: Creature Reports07:45 Charlie and Lola08:00 Natural Born Hunters08:25 Newsround08:30 Trust Me I'm a Genie08:40 League of Super Evil08:50 Frankenstein's Cat09:05 Wait for It!09:30 LazyTown09:55 Bob the Builder10:10 The Koala Brothers10:20 Guess with Jess10:30 Big & Small10:45 Buzz and Tell10:50 Big Cook Little Cook11:10 Timmy Time11:20 Nuzzle and Scratch11:40 Waybuloo12:00 In the Night Garden12:30 Daily Politics13:00 The Queen in Ireland: BBCNews Special14:00 Diagnosis Murder14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy15:15 Animal 24:716:00 Helicopter Heroes16:45 Flog It!17:30 Pointless18:15 Show Me the Monet19:00 Eggheads19:30 Great British Menu20:00 Britain's Secret Seas21:00 Britain's Next Big Thing22:00 The Country House Revealed23:00 Later Live - with Jools Holland23:30 Newsnight

01:35 The Zone03:35 UEFA Champions LeagueWeekly04:05 ITV Nightscreen05:30 The Jeremy Kyle Show06:30 ITV Morning News07:00 Daybreak09:30 Lorraine10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show11:30 This Morning13:30 Loose Women14:30 ITV News and Weather14:55 Meridian News and Weather15:00 60 Minute Makeover16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal16:59 Meridian Weather17:00 Midsomer Murders18:00 Britain's Best Dish19:00 Meridian Tonight19:30 ITV News and Weather20:00 Emmerdale20:30 Military Driving School21:00 Countrywise22:00 Home Is Where the Heart Is23:00 ITV News at Ten andWeather23:30 Meridian Tonight andWeather23:35 The Pelican Brief

01:05 The Event02:05 Poker03:00 The Dead Zone03:45 The Moonbird04:00 Empire: How Britain Madethe Modern World05:00 Saxon Gold: Finding theHoard05:55 Wogan's Perfect Recall06:20 Hill Street Blues07:10 The Hoobs08:00 Freshly Squeezed08:25 Everybody Loves Raymond08:55 Frasier09:25 Friends09:55 Jo Frost: Extreme ParentalGuidance10:55 Relocation: Phil Down Under11:55 A Place by the Sea13:00 Channel 4 News Summary13:05 River Cottage Every Day14:05 Water Stories14:10 Very Important Person16:10 Countdown17:00 Deal or No Deal18:00 Come Dine with Me19:00 The Simpsons19:30 Hollyoaks20:00 Channel 4 News20:55 4thought.tv21:00 Supersize vs Superskinny22:00 The Secret Millionaire23:00 Jamie's Food Revolution HitsHollywood

00:00 Evil Woman01:55 Rough Guide To02:10 SuperCasino05:05 Meals in Moments05:15 How Not to Decorate05:55 County Secrets06:10 Wildlife SOS06:35 House Doctor07:00 Thomas & Friends07:10 The Beeps07:20 The Adventures of Bottle TopBill and His Best Friend Corky07:35 Bert and Ernie's GreatAdventures07:40 Rupert Bear07:50 Peppa Pig07:55 Milkshake! Music Box08:00 Little Princess08:15 The Mr Men Show08:30 Thomas & Friends08:45 Make Way for Noddy09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots09:15 Peppa Pig09:25 Little Lodgers09:30 Roary the Racing Car09:40 Olivia09:50 The WotWots10:00 Ben and Holly's LittleKingdom10:15 The Wright Stuff12:05 Warship13:05 The Family Recipe13:10 5 News Lunchtime13:15 Law & Order14:15 Home and Away14:45 Neighbours15:15 The Vanessa Show16:05 Chinese Food in Minutes16:15 Always and Forever18:00 5 News at 518:30 Neighbours19:00 Home and Away19:25 OK! TV20:00 5 News at 720:30 Highland Emergency21:00 Supersize Grime22:00 CSI: Crime SceneInvestigation23:00 CSI: Miami23:55 CSI: NY

RIVER COTTAGEEVERY DAY

Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall takes his pas-sion for cooking into people's homes in amission to bring real, simple and tasty foodto the everyday table. He begins with waysto enjoy organic free-range meat on a tightbudget and visits a butcher to champion thecheapest cut in the shop - ox liver.

41

Wednesday18th May

00:15 The Lock Up00:45 The Football League Show01:50 The Prison Restaurant02:40 The Hairy Bikers03:40 Churches: How to ReadThem04:10 One Man and His Campervan04:40 Great British RailwayJourneys05:10 BBC News05:30 HARDtalk06:00 The World Today06:30 World Business Report07:00 Breakfast10:15 Fake Britain11:00 Homes Under the Hammer12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom12:45 Cash in the Attic13:15 Bargain Hunt14:00 BBC News; Weather14:30 Regional News and Weather14:45 Doctors15:15 Escape to the Country16:00 BBC News; Weather16:05 Copycats16:35 Sam & Mark's Guide toDodging Disaster16:40 Wingin' It17:00 Dani's House17:30 Little Howard's Big Question18:00 Newsround18:15 Weakest Link19:00 BBC News19:30 Regional News Programmes20:00 The One Show20:30 Waterloo Road21:30 Life of Riley22:00 The Apprentice23:00 BBC News23:25 Regional News and Weather23:35 The National LotteryWednesday Night Draws23:45 Not Going Out

BBC2

00:20 Operation Crossbow01:20 BBC News01:30 HARDtalk02:00 BBC News02:30 ABC World News03:00 BBC News03:30 The Record04:00 BBC News04:30 Close07:00 Wibbly Pig

07:10 Penelope07:15 Toddworld07:30 Tinga Tinga Tales07:40 Octonauts: Creature Reports07:45 Charlie and Lola08:00 Natural Born Hunters08:25 Newsround08:30 Trust Me I'm a Genie08:40 League of Super Evil08:50 Frankenstein's Cat09:00 Wait for It!09:30 LazyTown09:55 Bob the Builder10:05 The Koala Brothers10:15 Guess with Jess10:30 Big & Small10:45 Buzz and Tell10:50 Big Cook Little Cook11:10 Timmy Time11:20 Nuzzle and Scratch11:40 Waybuloo12:00 In the Night Garden12:30 Daily Politics14:00 See Hear14:30 Lifeline14:40 Coast14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy15:15 Animal 24:716:00 Helicopter Heroes16:45 Flog It!17:30 Pointless18:15 Show Me the Monet19:00 Eggheads19:30 Great British Menu20:00 Escape to the Country21:00 Two Greedy Italians22:00 Wonderland - A Hasidic Guideto Love, Marriage and Finding aBride23:00 The Apprentice: You're Fired!23:30 Newsnight

02:10 The Zone04:10 Crossing Jordan05:00 ITV Nightscreen06:30 ITV Morning News07:00 Daybreak09:30 Lorraine10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show11:30 This Morning13:30 Loose Women14:30 ITV News and Weather14:55 Meridian News and Weather15:00 60 Minute Makeover16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal16:59 Meridian Weather17:00 Midsomer Murders18:00 Britain's Best Dish19:00 Meridian Tonight19:30 ITV News and Weather20:00 Emmerdale20:30 Poms in Paradise21:00 The British Soap Awards201123:00 ITV News at Ten andWeather23:30 Meridian Tonight andWeather23:35 Cops with Cameras

00:05 Misfits01:10 UK & Ireland Poker Tour02:10 Freesports on 402:40 The Grid03:05 British Formula FordChampionship03:35 KOTV Boxing Weekly04:00 AVP Beach Volleyball04:55 Catching the Impossible05:45 Brief Encounters of theSporting Mind: Body Building05:50 Full Metal Challenge06:45 Yo Gabba Gabba!07:10 The Hoobs08:00 Freshly Squeezed08:25 Everybody Loves Raymond08:55 Frasier09:25 Friends09:55 Jo Frost: Extreme ParentalGuidance10:55 Location, Location, Location11:55 A Place by the Sea13:00 Channel 4 News Summary13:05 River Cottage Every Day14:10 Proud Parents14:20 Dark Command16:10 Countdown17:00 Deal or No Deal18:00 Come Dine with Me19:00 The Simpsons19:30 Hollyoaks20:00 Channel 4 News20:55 4thought.tv21:00 Vacation, Vacation, Vacation21:30 Superscrimpers: Waste NotWant Not22:00 24 Hours in A&E23:00 Desperate Housewives

00:55 CSI: Crime SceneInvestigation01:50 SuperCasino05:05 Meals in Moments05:15 How Not to Decorate05:55 County Secrets06:10 Wildlife SOS06:35 House Doctor07:00 Thomas & Friends07:10 The Beeps07:20 The Adventures of Bottle TopBill and His Best Friend Corky07:35 Bert and Ernie's GreatAdventures07:40 Rupert Bear07:50 Peppa Pig07:55 Milkshake! Music Box08:00 Little Princess08:15 The Mr Men Show08:30 Thomas & Friends08:45 Make Way for Noddy08:55 Mio Mao09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots09:15 Peppa Pig09:25 Little Lodgers09:30 Roary the Racing Car09:40 Olivia09:50 The WotWots10:00 Ben and Holly's LittleKingdom10:15 The Wright Stuff12:05 Warship13:05 The Family Recipe13:10 5 News Lunchtime13:15 Law & Order14:15 Home and Away14:45 Neighbours15:15 The Vanessa Show16:05 Meals in Moments16:15 McBride: The ChameleonMurder18:00 5 News at 518:30 Neighbours19:00 Home and Away19:25 OK! TV20:00 5 News at 720:15 Live UEFA Europa LeagueFootball23:00 Hollow Man

THE BRITISH SOAPAWARDS 2011

The stars of Coronation Street, EastEnders,Emmerdale, Hollyoaks and Doctors gatheron the red carpet as Phillip Schofield hoststhe 13th annual ceremony honouring TV'smost popular soaps.

42

Thursday19th May

00:15 Prime02:00 See Hear02:30 Watchdog03:30 Country Tracks04:25 One Man and His Campervan04:55 Click05:00 BBC News05:30 Panorama06:00 BBC News06:30 World Business Report07:00 Breakfast10:15 Fake Britain11:00 Homes Under the Hammer12:00 Don't Get Done, Get Dom12:45 Cash in the Attic13:15 Bargain Hunt14:00 BBC News; Weather14:30 Regional News and Weather14:45 Doctors15:15 Escape to the Country16:00 BBC News; Weather;Regional News16:05 Copycats16:35 Sam & Mark's Guide toDodging Disaster16:40 Wingin' It17:00 Project Parent17:30 My Life18:00 Newsround18:15 Weakest Link19:00 BBC News19:30 Regional News Programmes20:00 The One Show20:30 EastEnders21:00 Watchdog22:00 Inside the Human Body23:00 BBC News23:25 Regional News and Weather23:35 Question Time

BBC2

00:20 Stewart Lee's ComedyVehicle00:50 Citizen Ruth02:30 ABC World News with DianeSawyer03:00 BBC News03:30 The Record04:00 BBC News04:30 Click04:55 Close07:00 Wibbly Pig07:10 Penelope

07:15 Toddworld07:30 Tinga Tinga Tales07:40 Octonauts: Creature Reports07:45 Charlie and Lola08:00 Natural Born Hunters08:25 Newsround08:30 Trust Me I'm a Genie08:40 League of Super Evil08:50 Frankenstein's Cat09:00 Wait for It!09:30 LazyTown09:55 Bob the Builder10:05 The Koala Brothers10:20 Guess with Jess10:35 Big & Small10:45 Buzz and Tell10:50 Big Cook Little Cook11:10 Timmy Time11:20 Nuzzle and Scratch11:45 Waybuloo12:05 In the Night Garden12:35 The Pink Panther Show13:00 Daily Politics13:30 GMT with George Alagiah14:00 Coast14:05 Diagnosis Murder14:45 To Buy or Not to Buy15:15 Animal 24:716:00 Helicopter Heroes16:45 Flog It!17:30 Pointless18:15 Show Me the Monet19:00 Eggheads19:30 Great British Menu20:00 The Culture Show21:00 Business Nightmares withEvan Davis22:00 The Shadow Line23:00 Psychoville 223:30 Newsnight

00:35 Long Lost Family01:30 The Zone03:35 Hello, Dolly!06:00 ITV Nightscreen06:30 ITV Morning News07:00 Daybreak09:30 Lorraine10:25 The Jeremy Kyle Show11:30 This Morning13:30 Loose Women14:30 ITV News and Weather14:55 Meridian News and Weather15:00 60 Minute Makeover16:00 Dickinson's Real Deal16:59 Meridian Weather17:00 Midsomer Murders18:00 Britain's Best Dish19:00 Meridian Tonight19:30 ITV News and Weather20:00 Emmerdale20:30 The True Cost of a Car:Tonight21:00 Emmerdale21:30 Coronation Street22:00 Long Lost Family23:00 ITV News at Ten andWeather23:30 Meridian Tonight andWeather23:35 Piers Morgan's Life Stories:John Prescott

00:05 The Big Bang Theory00:35 Being N-Dubz in Americaand Beyond01:05 Mercury Prize Sessions01:20 4Play: Phoenix Foundation01:40 The Album Chart ShowSpotlight01:50 Against the Ropes03:45 The Dead Zone04:30 Barbarians05:25 Hill Street Blues06:10 Countdown06:55 Sali Mali07:00 The Treacle People07:10 The Hoobs08:00 Freshly Squeezed08:25 Everybody Loves Raymond08:55 Frasier09:25 Friends09:55 Jo Frost: Extreme ParentalGuidance10:55 Location, Location, Location11:55 A Place by the Sea13:00 Channel 4 News Summary13:05 River Cottage Every Day14:00 3 Minute Wonder: Good toKnow14:05 The Sheriff of Fractured Jaw16:10 Countdown17:00 Deal or No Deal18:00 Come Dine with Me19:00 The Simpsons19:30 Hollyoaks20:00 Channel 4 News20:55 4thought.tv21:00 Three in a Bed22:00 Hunting Britain's MostWanted23:00 Comedy Gala: Best Bits

01:15 Poker: Aussie Millions02:10 SuperCasino05:05 Meals in Moments05:15 How Not to Decorate05:55 Rough Guide to Beaches06:10 Wildlife SOS06:35 House Doctor07:00 Thomas & Friends07:10 The Beeps07:20 The Adventures of Bottle TopBill and His Best Friend Corky07:35 Bert and Ernie's GreatAdventures07:40 Rupert Bear07:50 Peppa Pig07:55 Milkshake! Music Box08:00 Little Princess08:15 The Mr Men Show08:30 Thomas & Friends08:45 Make Way for Noddy09:00 Fifi and the Flowertots09:15 Peppa Pig09:25 Little Lodgers09:30 Roary the Racing Car09:40 Olivia09:50 The WotWots10:00 Ben and Holly's LittleKingdom10:15 The Wright Stuff12:05 Warship13:05 The Family Recipe13:10 5 News Lunchtime13:15 Law & Order14:15 Home and Away14:45 Neighbours15:15 The Vanessa Show16:05 Chinese Food in Minutes16:10 Secrets of an UndercoverWife18:00 5 News at 518:30 Neighbours19:00 Home and Away19:25 OK! TV20:00 5 News at 720:30 Rough Guide toMediterranean Islands21:00 Emergency Bikers22:00 Extreme Fishing with RobsonGreen - At the Ends of the Earth23:00 Impossible?

THE CULTURESHOW

New series. Andrew Graham-Dixon presentsfrom London's South Bank at the Festival ofBritain's 60th anniversary celebrations.Nancy Durrant talks to Tracey Emin abouther retrospective at the Hayward Gallery,while Tom Dyckhoff explores the militarisa-tion of urban architecture. Mark Kermodeplays LA Noire, a new video game inspiredby film noir.


SPORT ON THE BOXAll the top sport on TV in your Good News paper

SATURDAYThe FA Cup Final

ITV1 2:00pm to 6:30pmManchester City v Stoke City.

Adrian Chiles introduces coverage of the FA Cup finalbetween Manchester City and Stoke City, live fromWembley. Cash-rich Manchester City are firm favourites,but their long-suffering supporters will take nothing forgranted as the club goes in search of its first major trophysince 1976. Manager Roberto Mancini has been giventhe task of making City a major force in the game and anFA Cup triumph would be the perfect launch pad. StokeCity, under the guidance of boss Tony Pulis, are playingin the final for the first time in the club's history. The longthrows of midfielder Rory Delap are sure to be a featureof the day as Stoke look to repeat the form that saw themthrash Bolton 5-0 in the semi-final. Commentary comesfrom Clive Tyldesley and Jim Beglin.

Tuesday 17th May20:45 England v Sweden

Women's Friendly InternationalsESPN (20:30-23:00)

Wednesday 18th May20:45 UEFA Europa League - Final

Football League Play-OffSky Sports 18:30pm to 11:00pm

Football League 1 Play-Off Semi-Final 2nd Leg.An npower League One play-off semi-final second leg.

LONG BALLS

by Malcolm PalmerA POINT. That’s all that separatesManchester United from mathemati-cal certainty of the title they’vethreatened to win for some time, butChelsea were incapable of impedingtheir march towards it, even thoughFrank Lampard’s scrambled second-half goal gave them hope – the writ-ing was on the wall after only 36 sec-onds, when the young Mexican starHernandez stroked coolly home. Atthe bottom, still nothing is decided,but things look decidedly grim in theEast End, as West Ham are threepoints adrift with two to play. It looksas if they won’t be travelling toNorwich next term, as the EastAnglian side have booked a place inthe top echelons, alongside QPR.Here in Spain, Real Madrid smackedin six of the best in Sevilla, no less,

and Mr Ronaldo helpedhimself to four of them,which means that he nowhas 34 goals, four behindthe record held jointly byZarra, of Athletic, some 60years ago, and the great HugoSanchez – and he still has threegames to play. But Barcelona, likeFergie’s lads, only need a point to beassured of the title they surelydeserve, after a 2-0 win in theCatalan derby against Español. Atthe dog-end, Almería are already rel-egated, readers will know thatHercuoles are favourites to jointhem, but there is a real scrap on tostay up, still featuring half a dozensides. In the second, Rayo and Betisare just about sure of promotion, andthe English-style play-off is startingto take shape, with Granada my per-sonal favourites there. (nothing to dowith the fact that they play in thesame strip as Doncaster Rovers,

honest!) Milan have been crownedchampions in Italy, and Lille look liketaking the French title.Going back to the Spanish league –money clearly plays an enormouspart in the perpetual prominence ofReal Madrid and Barcelona, but incase you are tempted to think of thisas a purely Spanish syndrome, donote that either Manchester Unitedor Chelsea have won the PremierLeague now for seven seasons, andone of them or Arsenal has beenchampion for the last sixteen! Whatto do about it? Search me, guv.

WHEN A POINT IS WORTH SO MUCH

Manchester United’s Hernandez

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THERUMOURMILL

All the transfergossip first in

SPORT!HULL CITY

Half the Hull City squad will be released/sold over the summer.Those with potential deals already in place, Tijani Belaid, DavidAmoo (Liverpool), Hope Akpan (Everton) will be released. CraigFagan, Will Akinson, Matt Duke and Anthony Gardner will all bereleased. Jimmy Bullard, Seyi Olofinjana, Paul McShane, KevinKilbane and Kamel Ghilas will all be sold/given away.

RANGERS

After Craig Whyte has given McCoist roughly 10-15 million tospend in the summer, Rangers will look to sign DavidGoodwillie from Dundee United, David Templeton from Hearts,Craig Conway also from Dundee United, and attempt to re-signDanny Wilson on a year's loan from Liverpool. Rangers arealso looking for another centre back because of Bougherra'sdecision to seek a new challenge, so Rangers will look at GaryKenneth and Christophe Berra if Wolves are relegated

FULHAM

Mark Hughes has revealed his admiration for Espanyol strikerPablo Daniel Osvaldo, who has been linked with a move toFulham. The £12million-rated Argentina-born Italian, who wason target again for the Spanish La Liga outfit in the 2-1 winagainst Athletic Bilbao last week, has also reportedly attractedthe interest of Manchester United, Spurs and Everton in addi-tion to Fulham.

BOLTON

Owen Coyle knows there is every chance he could lose GaryCahill in the summer, with a number of Premier League rivalsready to pounce.The Whites would demand a fee of around £15million for the

England international, and it appears as though they arealready considering potential replacement.

LIVERPOOL

Damien Comolli and Kenny Daglish have been finalising trans-fer targets for when the window re-opens in a couple of weekswith Jose Enrique, Ashley Young and Hulk believed to be thepriority signings. Charlie Adam, Connor Wickham, Yann M'Vila,Sergio Canales, Blause Matuldi, Keisuke Honda, Phil Jones,Alex Smithies, Gary Cahill and Sylvain Marveaux are a fewother players who have been monitored by the club and don'tbe too surprised if 1 or 2 of these turn out at Anfield next sea-son.

WEST HAM

Avram Grant is quitting West Ham after their final match. CardiffCity have contacted him about taking over at the CCS if DavidJones moves back up north to Blackburn should the Bluebirdsnot win promotion.Villa also interested in him as well as a few clubs abroad.

Replacing Grant will be Alan Curbishley, HMMM…

MAN CITY

Man city will bid for Sanchez in the region of €70m and alsoValeron is eyeing a move to Napoli for €17m. Evra & Nani toswap from City to United.

MAN UTD

Wolves are willing to loan Michael Kightly out for 2011/12 if theystay up. Reading FC are looking at him as a replacement forJimmy Kebe if they do not go up.Manchester united has made a 25 mill bid for Özil .He will havea trial there on the 11th May.

ARSENAL

Arsenal will offer Nesta a 1 year deal to join Arsenal in the sum-mer beat rivals Chelsea and Spurs have also been linked.

HE PLAYED WITH ASMILE ON HIS FACE

BALLESTEROS, a five-time major champion whoseincomparable imagination and fiery personality madehim one of the most significant figures in moderngolf, died Saturday from complications of a cancer-ous brain tumour. He was 54.

"Seve was one of the most talented and excitedgolfers to ever play the game," Tiger Woods said onTwitter. "His creativity and inventiveness on the golfcourse may never be surpassed. His death camemuch too soon."

A statement on Ballesteros' website early Saturdaysaid he died peacefully at 2:10 a.m. local time, sur-rounded by his family at his home in Pedrena. It wasin this small Spanish town where Ballesteros firstwrapped his hands around a crude 3-iron and beganinventing shots that he would display on some ofgolf's grandest stages. He won the Masters at 23, leading by 10 shots at one

point in the final round. He was a three-time winner of

the British Open, no moment greater than his 1984victory at St. Andrews. He was as inspirational inEurope as Arnold Palmer was in America, a hand-some figure who feared no shot and often playedfrom where no golfer had ever been. "Today, golf lost a great champion and a great friend.We also lost a great entertainer and ambassador forour sport," Jack Nicklaus said. "No matter the golfthat particular day, you always knew you were goingto be entertained. Seve's enthusiasm was justunmatched by anybody I think that ever played thegame."

In a long list of spectacular shots, perhaps the mostmemorable came from a parking lot next to the 16thfairway at Royal Lytham & St. Anne’s in the 1979British Open. Leading by two in the final round, hedrove his ball into the lot, had a car removed to gethis free drop, then fired his second shot to 15 feet andmade birdie on his way to his first major.

46 Friday, May 13, 2011

SPORTS ROUND-UPWith Mick Hardy from Kidease

PREMIER & LA LIGA FIXTURES

Premier League

Saturday, 14 May

Blackburn v Man Utd, 13:45 Blackpool v Bolton, 13:45

Sunderland v Wolverhampton, 13:45 West Brom v Everton, 13:45

Sunday, 15 May

Chelsea v Newcastle, 14:30 Arsenal v Aston Villa, 17:00

Birmingham v Fulham, 17:00 Liverpool v Tottenham, 17:00

Wigan v West Ham, 17:00

Tuesday, 17 May

Man City v Stoke, 20:45

La Liga

Sunday, 15 May

Almeria v Mallorca, 16:00Athletic Bilbao v Malaga, 16:00

Atletico Madrid v Hercules, 16:00Barcelona v Deportivo La Coruna, 16:00

Getafe v Osasuna, 16:00Real Zaragoza v Espanyol, 16:00

Sevilla v Real Sociedad, 16:00Sporting Gijon v Racing Santander, 16:00

Valencia v Levante, 16:00Villarreal v Real Madrid, 16:00

TOP TWO IN A THRILLERDAYA NUEVA 2 V. ALBATERA 2

Alevins under 12sTeam Sponsor, Segurlab. Kit Sponsor, bluemoon-

sport.co.uk

San Fulgencio CF 3 – 1 CF BigastroSponsored by 900telecom.com

JUNIOR STRIKERS Sponsored by the House Maids RESULTS 7/5/2011

Pre Benjamins: Sponsored by The Vegetable GardenSan Miguel 3 Junior Strikers 2

The Blues Pre Bens suffered a big blow to their title hopesand now face an uphill battle to secure a semi final place.After dominating for most periods of the first half the Bluesfound themselves behind against the run of play. Within sec-onds of the restart Junior Strikers drew level through RudiMckinley who after a fantastic run fired a shot pass the homekeeper from distance. Eddie Corbit then gave the Blues thelead with a neat volley inside the area from a Mckinley cor-ner.

Soon after the away team took the lead, the ref might aswell of changed his green shirt for a Red and white one ofSan Miguel. The Blues were then denied a blatant penaltyfor a foul that was clearly inside the area. The Ref thendecided that every time a San Miguel player was touched itwas a foul and awarded free kick after free kick until eventu-ally San Miguel drew level. With only moments left SanMiguel delivered the killer blow to take all three points. TheBlues Pre Benjamin’s season’s hard work was all undone bya one sided ref.

Benjamins: Sponsored by Kulsveen s.l.Sheffield United 0 Junior Strikers 4

The Blues Benjamin’s had to dig deep to gain maximum

points away to Sheffield United.This was a very intense match because a win for the Blues

would ensure a guaranteed semi final place with one matchstill to play. Due to the match being played on a Thursdayevening Junior Strikers were without three first team playersbut still went ahead with the game calling upon two PreBenjamin’s Eddie Corbit and Rudi Mckinley to step up andcover for their older absent team mates. The Blues had allthe possession in the first period but could not get that allimportant break in front of goal. A goal less first half meantthat the Blues needed to find a way to break the home teamdown to gain semi final status. Sheldon Green finally gavethe Blues a deserved lead after a great solo run and finishfrom an impossible angle. After a quiet first half Blues keeperKristjan Kartsson was called upon to make a great save todeny Sheffield United drawing level. Sheldon Green thenwent through the gears and delivered a 10 minute hatrick toput the game beyond Sheffield United. Both Joshua Charlesand Jordan Harding were immense in there defensive rolesthroughout the game.

Junior Strikers training sessions take place at the new sportscentre in Playa Flamenca.Monday and Wednesday 6pm-7pmMini Strikers group for age 3-5 years on Monday’s 6pm-7pmFor more info about Junior Strikers please visit our websitewww.juniorstrikers.com

TURK OF THE TOWN!

Spinner turns winner as Vettel grabsF1 glorySEBASTIAN VETTEL hailed his victo-

ry in the Turkish Grand Prix as a "greatresult" for Red Bull after his crash onFriday had presented the team with aheadache.

Vettel's spin in wet conditions duringthe opening practice session gave hismechanics plenty to keep them occu-pied, with the defending world champi-on forced to miss the second sessionlater that day.However, the car was ready in time for

Saturday morning's final session andVettel immediately leapt to the top ofthe timesheets before securing poleposition in qualifying.

Webber finished second after a longbattle with Ferrari's Fernando Alonso,who passed him on lap 29 before theAustralian took the place back withseven laps to go.

Schuey ‘likely to quit'FORMER F1 driver Johnny Herbert

believes Michael Schumacher willretire for a second time sooner ratherthan later. The seven-time world cham-pion is in the second year of his come-back with Mercedes GP but has strug-gled to date and has yet to score apodium finish.

He has also been consistently out-qualified and out-raced by team-mateNico Rosberg. Schumacher finished12th in the Turkish Grand Prix – sevenplaces behind Rosberg. Herbert, whowas Schumacher's team-mate atBenetton when he won his second titlein 1995, said he thought age was not afactor in the 42-year-old's decline,rather that the new generation of driv-ers have raised the bar.

Weylandt killed in Girotragedy

Cycling was in a state of shock thisweek after Belgian rider WouterWeylandt died following a crash duringthe third stage of the Giro d'Italia.

TV footage showed the 26-year-oldlying on the ground and bleeding heav-ily from his head after falling off his bikeon the descent from the Passo delBocco. Race doctor Giovanni Tredicirevealed the battle to save Weylandt's

life had been a desperate struggle bythe roadside with Weylandt sufferingmultiple injuries including to his skull."The attempts to revive the rider lasted45 minutes," he said. "I reached thescene barely 30 seconds after he hadcrashed, and was quickly joined byother experts, including a team doctor.But the situation was very serious, wecould not do anything despite our bestefforts." Helmets have been mandatory incycling since the death of Kazakhstan'sAndrei Kivilev during the Paris-Nicerace in 2003. Italian Thomas Casarottodied following a crash during last year'sGiro del Friuli.The last rider to die in a crash in aGrand Tour was Italy's Fabio Casartelliduring the 1995 Tour de France.

Olympic medalistsguilty of perjury

A court in Greece has sentenced twoGreek sprinters to suspended jail sen-tences for staging a motorcycle crashto avoid a doping test. Kostas Kenterisand Katerina Thanou were found guiltyof perjury and sentenced to 31 monthseach.

Their coach, Christos Tzekos, wassentenced for 33 months, though allthree were expected to appeal.

The sprinters had said an accidentcaused them to miss a drugs test onthe eve of the 2004 Olympics inAthens. But Judge Dimitris Lefkos saidthe crash had never occurred.

Two supposed witnesses and severaldoctors who treated the athletes inhospital were given shorter sentences. Kenteris, 37, won gold in the 200m atthe Sydney Olympics in 2000 andThanou, 36, took silver in the 100m.

Glover shoots downByrd

American golfer Lucas Glover beatcompatriot Jonathan Byrd at the firstextra hole of a sudden-death play-off towin the Wells Fargo Championship.The 2009 US Open champion parredthe par-four 18th after his rival madefive, both having finished on 15-underpar for the tournament. South Africa'sRory Sabbatini finished third, one shotbehind, after a seven-under 65, whileIreland's Padraig Harrington shot 68 toshare ninth place.

Seve’s Spanish Opentribute

South African Thomas Aiken claimedthe Spanish Open on Sunday - anddedicated his victory to SeverianoBallesteros.

The 27-year-old's first European Tourtitle was overshadowed by the death ofthe five-time major winner the previousday. "I definitely want to dedicate thiswin to him with it being his home Openand what he gave to his home fans andto golf," said the winner.Aiken beat Denmark's Anders Hansen

by two shots with a final-round 70 atthe El Prat course near Barcelona. Allthe players wore black ribbons in mem-ory of home favourite Ballesteros andAiken added: "He was everything to thegame of golf and I am happy to havewon for him. Any of us would have wonfor him.

"I remember Seve, how he enjoyedlife and how he enjoyed the game. Hehas been an inspiration for me and haskept me working hard." The formerRyder Cup star won the Spanish Openon three occasions during his illustriousplaying career.

Boeljon’s maiden titleglory

Christel Boeljon held her nerve toclaim her first solo European Tour titleat the Turkish Airlines Ladies Open inAntalya. The 23-year-old Dutch girlheld a one-stroke lead going into thefinal day and closed with a level-par 73for a five-under-par total.

She finished three strokes clear ofplaying partners Florentyna Parker andBecky Brewerton, who double bogeyedthe last..

Boeljon opened up a five-strokeadvantage after 11 holes and despite ashaky finish – with four bogeys and achip-in birdie over the closing sevenholes – she had the cushion to walkaway with the €37,500 first prize.

THIS WEEK: USPGA Tour: ThePlayers’ Championship, Ponte VedraBeach, Florida. European Tour:Iberdrola Open, Pula GC, SonServera, Mallorca. Ladies’ EuropeanTour: Open of Portugal, Campo RealGolf, Turcifal, Portugal.

HERCULES were still without Farinós,and, with Fritzler suspended, their mid-field had a threadbare look as they tookthe field on a sunny afternoon, marredby a brief shower, in front of a crowdthat looked to be in the region of18,000. An emotive minute’s silence forthe legendary golfer was observedrespectfully, then the play began, withtwo fouls on French winger Thomertleaving him injured, and Rufete foundhimself on the pitch after only four min-utes.

Giovani was a constant threat whenRacing came forward, his speed caus-ing problems for the Hercules defence.With fourteen minutes on the clock, hefulfilled his promise when he rose tohead home a cross from the right, for

an easy goal, with the Hercules defence‘ball-watching’ and Calatayud nowhereat all. 0-1.

At the other end, four minutes later,Tiago’s free kick drew a stunning fin-ger-tip save from Toño, whose keepingwas a notable feature of the wholegame, as he took high balls with greatconfidence. Peña was playing well forthe home side, and a combined moveby Kiko and Cortes finished with a goal-kick when the ball was somehow keptout by the Racing defenders. Kiko shotstraight at Toño, and Rufete put AbelAguilar through, only for his shot to bedeflected for a corner. Hercules hadwhat appeared to be a valid goal disal-lowed after a Cortes free kick on 36minutes, but their pressure paid off

when, three minutes later, veteranSendoa lashed home a low cross-shotto equalise. 1-1. But less than a minutelater, a break straight from the kick-offsaw Giovani with space to chip expertlyover Calatayud. 1-2. Only three minutespassed before Tiago, at the other end,rammed home an unstoppable shot tomake it 2-2. But that wasn’t the end ofthe craziness, and right on the stroke ofhalf time, Henrique Adrián took aninnocuous-looking free kick from mid-way inside the home half. Cala, whowas having a ‘bad day at the office,’flapped at the ball, as it sailed over hishead into the net. 2-3.Trezeguet (at last!) replaced Sendoa asthe second period began. The Alicanteside exerted a lot of pressure on thevisitors’ defence as the minutes tickedaway, but Toño was a tower of strength,and inswinging corners were invariably

his property. Rufete had run himselfalmost to a standstill, but still lookedthe best of the home players.Valdez appeared to foul Cismaa, andthe referee saw fit to show him a redcard after 62 minutes – Hercules onceagain committed to finishing a gamewith ten men. Cisma, who had writhedaround in agony for a while, made amiraculous recovery.

Calatayud almost spilt another cross,then a Racing shot hit the post whenthey surged forward again.

David Trezeguet hooked Rufete’scross over the bar in the dying minutes,but Racing’s numerical superiority wastelling, and time ran out with theHercules faithful lamenting a less-than-dynamic performance, especially indefence, which leaves them with a greatdeal to do – and hope for from othersources – in the last three matches.


EX HERCULANO TOÑO THWARTS THE BLUE-AND-WHITESWith the sad, untimely death of Seve Ballesteros overshadowing this vital relegation clash,

defensive errors by the Alicante side proved costly, and the second division looms.

Hercules 2 – Racing de Santander 3

by DAN SMITH

JOSÉ BORDALÁS had no intentionof letting depression set into theElche psyche after their poorresult in Salamanca 13 daysbefore. The usually quite thespoken Bordalás left playerscovering their ears duringthe habitual midweek gameagainst the reserves. Harshwords directed at thedefence and keeper mean hewas in no doubt where theblame fell for the unusual result.

Defensively Elche have one of the best recordsin the division but the grim performance inSalamanca laid doubt in some minds aboutthem coping with the added pressure ofreaching the play offs. And following a week of manage-

rial ear-bashing Elche tookon the surprise club ofthe division,Alcorcón, lastFriday evening whowere playing in thesecond division forthe first time intheir history and satcomfortably midtable, however theencounter was anythingbut easy.

Elche midfielder Edu Albacar's missile of ashot on 35 minutes was enough for the homeside to take the three points. In what was ascruffy but entertaining performance by bothteams with Elche defending well even though cen-tre back and Captain Samuel was told just minutesbefore kick-off that he would have to watch thegame from the stands, harsh punishment?

Manager Bordalás must get things back into shapeas the club begin their final run in, five games remain -three of which are away against play-off rivals starting lastnight at second placed Rayo Vallecano. On the followingMonday evening they are at home to Villarreal B at 9pm. Thenit’s two back to back away games to Celta and Granada fol-lowed by the final game of the season at home to Xerez.

Manager Bordalás tells his players to step into line if they are to reach La LigaON THE BORD-WALK

EDU ALBACAR 35min rocketshot won the game for elche

JOSÉ BORDALÁS gives instructions toEDU ALBACAR the games only goal

scorer - Photos: MARK WELTON

Photo: Mark Welton

Hercules down but vowing to return

By MALCOLM PALMERAS they prepared to face the mid-tableislanders in yet another do-or-die fix-ture, the Alicante club had little realhope of avoiding relegation, as clubsjust above them continued to showgood form. Getafe, however, had fallenfoul of Real Madrid, and CristianoRonaldo in particular, whose sevengoals in two matches had put him onlyone away from Zarra and HugoSanchez’s shared all-time record.

A ray of hope had come in the shapeof the lifting of Nelson Valdez’s sus-pension, after Saturday’s red card, butthere were still notable gaps inHercules’ line-up, but Farinós wasback in midfield, and Velthuizen waspreferred to the out-of-form Calatayudin goal. It was good to see Pamarotback in the centre of defence. Valdezfound himself on the bench.

Mallorca looked like being danger-

ously quick, with de Guzman andWebo outstanding in attack.

A crowd of some 18,000 greeted theteams on a pleasant evening.

Trezeguet went very close from aCortes cross after five minutes, hisshot grazing the bar. Then, when Kikomade a great run through the Mallorcadefence, the ball was slipped back toSendoa, and the veteran wingerslammed it gleefully into the net. 1-0,and 12 minutes gone. Pamarot wasmaking his presence felt in defence,as the home side dominated play.Tiago saw a yellow card, but Marti’sfree kick went straight intoVelthuizen’s grasp. The Dutchman waslooking sound. Cendros saw a yellowcard for the visitors after 35 minutes,but much of the action was in midfield,where Abel Aguilar was next to be cau-tioned. The referee failed to noticewhen Kiko was blatantly fouled after40 minutes, but then his superb cross

found Sendoa at the far post, whocrashed the ball into the net. Is it hisbirthday? 2-0, and two minute to half-time. Trezeguet was ruled offside soonafterwards, or it would have beenthree. On the first half showing,Hercules, in their ‘Dr Jekyll’ guise,looked anything but second divisionmaterial, with young Kiko and Cortesoutstanding.

Fritzler was on for a not-fully-recovered Farinós as the second halfbegan. Mallorca started to exert pres-sure, but Pamarot made some goodstops, then Velthuizen brought off afine save. Sendoa came off to greatapplause, and was replaced by debu-tant Luis Carlos. Abel Aguilar mighthave done better with a header fromKiko’s cross, then Hercules won adangerous free kick, which Mallorcascrambled clear. Luis Carlos’ shot flewjust wide after 65 minutes. Then AbelAguilar strode through, the ball came

through to Trezeguet – in space, foronce – but he shot wide.

Things took a turn for the worsewhen, after 76 minutes, a scramble inthe Hercules goalmouth resulted inthe ball coming out to Marti, whodrove it home from just outside thearea. Two minutes later, and ‘Mr Hyde’had really taken over, as Webó racedthrough and chipped the keeperexpertly. 2-2. Valdez came on forTiago – about time! But, apart fromonce feeding Trezeguet, who againshot wide, there was little he could do.Pereira shot narrowly wide for the vis-itors. And that was the whole, sad,tale. Big hole, here we come!

After the match trainer MiroslavDjukic admitted that his players wereexhausted, and said they had giventheir all.

Barcelona, incidentally, scraped thepoint they needed to be sure of thetitle, with a 1-1 draw at Levante.


Hercules 2 - Mallorca 2

Nelson Valdez...down and outHércules sink back into the

second division

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