my precious boy Dear Hospice Staff, One year ago, on March 20, my son Darrell Sholar passed away at your facility. He had been admitted on the 19th at about 9 p.m. or so, after we were unable to care for him at home. My son went by the name of Bud, and although he was 50 years old, he was still my precious boy. Bud was in a desperate state that night and was very combative. We knew that it was the cancer of the lungs and brain that caused him to be that way, but I have thought so often since that the staff there only knew him in that condition. It was a long way from his normal. But even with him being that way, you all were so very kind and patient, doing everything possible to make it better for him and for us. As a retired RN myself, I have been so grateful to all of you because I knew that he was not the only person that you had to care for, but it seemed that he was, with all your attention to him. I don’t remember all your names, but I will never forget your faces and loving care. You truly were a shining example of your chosen profession that night. I am enclosing a picture of Bud that I love. He was the kindest little boy you ever saw, and no Mother has ever had a son that showed her that he loved her for his entire life as much as Bud did to me. A day or two before he died he was sleeping and I was sitting close to his bedside. I lay my head down on the side of the bed and felt him move. I looked up and he was smiling at me and said, “Mom, you gave me life, and then you gave me life again.” I don’t know what he meant by that, but evidently it made him happy. The last year has been the hardest of my 70 years, and I miss Bud more than words can say. A great-granddaughter born eight days after Bud died has been the absolute redeeming gift from God. Isn’t it wonderful that He has plans for us that He knows we will need in order to get through the fire? This picture was made in happier days when Bud was still that little boy to me. Just look at it occasionally, and then pat yourself on the back for the marvelous job you did that night. You are all angels. I will never forget you. Many, many thanks and lots of love to all, Jay and Pat Jones Bud’s mom and step-dad A PUBLICATION OF THE HOSPICE OF EAST TEXAS SUMMER 2008 my precious boy Nothing we could write could more eloquently express what Hospice means than this letter we received from Pat Jones, mother of Darrell Sholar who was a patient at HomePlace in 2007. With Mrs. Jones’ permission, we share her heartfelt thanks with you.
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my precious boyDear Hospice Staff,
One year ago, on March 20, my sonDarrell Sholar passed away at yourfacility. He had been admitted on the19th at about 9 p.m. or so, after wewere unable to care for him at home.My son went by the name of Bud, andalthough he was 50 years old, he wasstill my precious boy.
Bud was in a desperate state that nightand was very combative. We knew thatit was the cancer of the lungs and brainthat caused him to be that way, but Ihave thought so often since that the
staff there only knew him in thatcondition. It was a long way
from his normal. Buteven with him being
that way, youall were so
very
kind and patient, doing everythingpossible to make it better for him andfor us. As a retired RN myself, I havebeen so grateful to all of you because Iknew that he was not the only personthat you had to care for, but it seemedthat he was, with all your attention tohim. I don’t remember all your names,but I will never forget your faces andloving care. You truly were a shiningexample of your chosen profession thatnight.
I am enclosing a picture of Bud that Ilove. He was the kindest little boy youever saw, and no Mother has ever hada son that showed her that he lovedher for his entire life as much as Buddid to me. A day or two before he diedhe was sleeping and I was sitting closeto his bedside. I lay my head down onthe side of the bed and felt him move.I looked up and he was smiling at me
and said, “Mom, you gave me life, andthen you gave me life again.” I don’tknow what he meant by that, butevidently it made him happy.
The last year has been the hardest ofmy 70 years, and I miss Bud more thanwords can say. A great-granddaughterborn eight days after Bud died hasbeen the absolute redeeming gift fromGod. Isn’t it wonderful that He hasplans for us that He knows we willneed in order to get through the fire?
This picture was made in happier dayswhen Bud was still that little boy tome. Just look at it occasionally, andthen pat yourself on the back for themarvelous job you did that night. Youare all angels. I will never forget you.
Many, many thanks and lots of love to all,
Jay and Pat JonesBud’s mom and step-dad
A PUBLICATION OF THE HOSPICE OF EAST TEXAS
SUMMER 2008
my precious boyNothing we could write could more eloquently express what Hospice means than this letter we receivedfrom Pat Jones, mother of Darrell Sholar who was a patient at HomePlace in 2007. With Mrs. Jones’permission, we share her heartfelt thanks with you.
it chose me“It Chose Me”
People ask, is a hospice nurse what Ichose to be?
I often ponder, did I? Or did it choose me?
Daily we deal with so much death and dyingPeople very sad and often cryingThey say, how can you remain
of good faith and cheer?I remember we all have one home.
It’s just not here!As I prepare for my day,
and see my badge with the hospice dove,It reminds me, my strength comes from above.Now when they ask is a hospice nurse
what I chose to be,I turn and answer with a smile,
no IT CHOSE ME!
By Jacob Cabrera, RN
Hospice nurses rarely describe their work as a job. Many use the word“calling”, some use the word “ministry”, to describe the certainty thathospice care is what they were meant to do. For Jacob Cabrera, RN,the word is “chosen”.
Though he’s not a poet by nature, Jacob’s eloquent words ofconnection and belonging just seemed to flow after the experience ofcaring for twelve year old Noe and his family. The sense of havingbeen chosen for that particular role was a powerful one, compoundedby Jacob’s admiration for the young patient who touched his heart.
“Noe seemed more alive than anyone I’d ever met, even though he wasvery, very sick,” said Jacob. “He lived life to the fullest, and he lovedeveryone he met. He was only 12 years old, but he was so wise, and hetaught me so much.”
How fortunate we are that hospice nursing “chose” Jacob Cabrera. Hisskills, his compassion and his creativity were a blessing to Noe andcontinue to be a blessing to us all.
it chose me
sharing memories NEW IN 2007–2008Gin AblesBobye AdamsonExa BallardMaxine BarnetteEddy BentleyCarolyn Bolton& CookieGordonBreedloveDon BrooksBill BurnsBee BynumPatricia ColburnRuth Compton &SimonValarie CowanKathy CrimMarlisCuthbertsonRoberta DensonRichard DiekmanLinda Dillard &LuluSandra DillonWilliam DillonFrieda DoolenSue DuckCynthia EllingtonRalph EverettWinnie SueEverettRudy FrancisGary GilmoreMary GermanyDarlene GraserBarbara GustValerie HardyIris HarteMary AnnHilliardRobert HughesJeanie HulseySusan JasperBeverly JimersonCrystal Jones &Buster, Brittany& ChaseSharon Kelley
Patty KirbyJudy KitchingsJim KurtzJennifer LacefieldMary LambersonJanet LathamNancy LeeBetty LeFloreCarrie LindleyJanetteMaldonado-JohnsonTony MartinDonna McEwenHailey MillerJoan MillsFaye MitchellMartelleMoronkoPatty Morris andElleEstha NowlinShirley O’KeefeSusan ParksBarbara PattonDonna PirtleMarilynn Pryor,Katie & FredoMichelle RabbEva RamirezJune ReaghBruceRhiddlehooverLarry RichardsonChristi RoyNadine RussBeverly RussellKarin SandersSusen Santoro,Bebe & BobShannon Sieber,Luke & LucyMartha SmelleyPenny StephensAlice ToddBillie TurknettAnn UsseryElaine Walters
“I just let them share their memories,” says Grady Stewart. “There is so muchpain, and talking seems to help. If I have a gift, it’s the ability to share the painthat people are feeling and tell them I really understand, because I think I do.”
As a bereavement volunteer, Grady logs many hours on the phone, talking tofamilies of patients served by The Hospice of East Texas. “They are missingtheir loved ones so much and it seems to mean a lot to them that we call,” hesays. “I just tell them we’re thinking of them, and we know it’s hard and wewant them to know we care and we’re still there for them.”
It isn’t easy work, but Grady is clear about the benefits. “It’s the mostemotional thing I’ve ever done, but I’m the one who gets the bigger blessing.You always do, when you give of yourself, you know?”
sharing memories
“It’s the most emotionalthing I’ve ever done, but I’m the one who
gets the bigger blessing.”
Grady does know. He’s spent a lifetimefinding ways to help others. Growing upin rural Georgia, “we never had enough togo around, but we always had enough toshare,” he says. In his career as asupervisor for GE and Welex, he was the one who searched out people havingtrouble. “Sometimes they just needed a ride to work to keep them from losingtheir job,” he says. “It was the little things that got in the way”.
A Hospice volunteer since 1997, Grady has done everything from answeringthe phone to working with home care patients, and he has served in thebereavement department for four years. His kind voice and caring words driftdown the hall in the Pat Oge Center for Living, an inspiration to the staff whowork close by. “You can feel the love in his voice,” says Mary Guin,Bereavement Coordinator, “and he always ends his calls the same way, saying“ ‘I wish I was there to give you a big hug!’ I know that those he talks to canfeel that hug too!”
HOET volunteers
(continued on page 5)
Vince Piotet shares his music with patients and families at HomePlace.
Dr. Helen Graham served Hospice of East Texas for manyyears as Medical Director. Dr. Wiley Roosth and Dr. Arielle Leecelebrated Dr. Graham at her retirement reception.
Dr. Helen Graham and Dr. Duane Andrews.
HOET celebrated its 25thanniversary in 2007 with apresentation by MitchAlbom, author of Tuesdayswith Morrie and For OneMore Day.
Tony Houstonvolunteered for Hospice
almost every day for six years. His wife and
daughter gathered with staff and volunteers to celebrate the placing
of a brick in his memory on the Walk of Friends.
HOET volunteersThelmaWashingtonCindy WelchPat WhiteSue WhitePatricia WilliamsDarla WogamanTonya WrightGlen Wierick
UP TO 5 YEARSMarge AdamsCountice AllenAl AmundsonPat AndersonAnne BallardJames BallardCindy BlakeDorothyBramblettMary BreedloveBarbara BrooksLilie BroughtonOrlinda BrownRobert BrownWilli BuhlWes BynumJane CarrollJeanie CarterBee ClarkJean CowenGlenna CrosmanYvonneCrumptonPatty CurtisDoris DavisEva DavisonJohn DrakeVirginia DuncanLee EdmondsonPaula EdwardsJudy EllisCamella FieldsJudy FloydSarah FordBobbie ForsytheRuby FrazierTerri FrazierHomer Gilbert
Debra Grant-NewsomeMarie GreshamClassie GunterLynda HarrisonNancy HartGil HayhurstMona HillVictoria HolmesAmy HowellLouise HubbardMary JenningsKimberli JohnsonKathy JohnstonMarian KaplitaPeggy KeelingKathrynKilpatrickRichard LiptakJim LinneyKatie LundShermanMayfieldIris McCraryMarjorieMcGannonGinger MeesLee Anne MeyersKathryn MillerElizabeth MinorMim MoorePauline MooreBillie MorganD’Anne MoxonMarionMurphreeBeth MyersKen NeffReba NewtonMartha OatesMelba Jean PageJoyce PerryDean PhillipsVince PiotetBill PittsBetty Porter James ReeseGlynda RossSue Sawyer
(continued on page 7)
When Nickie Knighton’s husband was apatient in HomePlace, she learned first-handwhat comfort a homemade quilt could be.Mrs. Knighton has made 12 quilts forHospice, each one an expression of hercreativity, and a beautiful symbol of the loveand care Hospice provides for our patients.
Macy Adams madehomemade cookies to sharewith families at HomePlace.
Sometimes laughter is very good medicine! TheHospice social workers were fierce competitorswith their “jailbird” chili at the annual Hospicechili cookoff.
Penny Stephens’ welcomingsmile greets families andvisitors at HomePlace.
holiday remembrance
Your gifts ensure our ability to care.Private support makes it possible forThe Hospice of East Texas to offer itscaring services to all who need them,regardless of their life situation or theirability to pay. Gifts of all sizes and allkinds from generous friends throughoutEast Texas are essential to our work andare very much appreciated.
MEMORIALS OR HONORARIUMSGifts in honor or memory of lovedones, friends or businessassociates are a great way to
give to The Hospice ofEast Texas. A card
acknowledgingyour gift is
mailed tothe
recipient, with no mention of the giftamount.
PLANNED GIVING
Remember The Hospice of East Texasin your will or estate.
BRICKS AND TILES
The Walk of Friends in the gardens atHomePlace and Recognition Tilesthroughout the facility are enduringlegacies of those who have touched ourlives.
IN-KIND GIFTS
There are many opportunities for in-kind gifts, especially at HomePlace—toys for the playroom, quilts for thebeds, food for families.
RESALE SHOPPE
The Hospice Shoppe in Hendersonaccepts donations of gently usedclothing and household items. Items
may be dropped at the Shoppe inHenderson or at the Hospice offices at4111 University Boulevard in Tyler.
For more information about donating to TheHospice of East Texas, contact the CommunityRelations Department at (903) 266-3400 [email protected]. To donate on-line, visit www.hospiceofeasttexas.org.
VOLUNTEER OPPORTUNITIES
Throughout our 18 county service area,there are many ways to get involvedwith The Hospice of East Texas.Volunteers are needed for office work,direct involvement with patients andfamilies, and special projects. If youhave a gift, we can use it!
For more information, contact ChristineMorawski, Director of Community Relationsand Outreach at (903) 266-3400 [email protected].
holiday remembranceAt holiday time, each ornamentgleaming on the Hospice Tree ofRemembrance commemorates thelife of a patient served by TheHospice of East Texas. Chosen withcare by those who loved them, theornaments are symbols of lives notforgotten. A little RV is a reminder ofthe joys of retirement years, an angelcommemorates a much-lovedgrandmother. A handmade spherecolored by children, a photo in asilver frame, tiny plaques withcomforting words of scripture, eachornament is an opportunity to expresslove and remembrance once again. Aspecial gathering brings families tothe Pat Oge Center for Living to hangtheir ornaments on the Tree ofRemembrance, and offers them thechance to share their memories with
each other and Hospice staff.
The Hospice Tree of Remembranceis one of many opportunities forhealing offered to grieving families byThe Hospice of East Texas. Eachfamily served by Hospice is followedfor a year following the death of theirloved one, receiving regular phonecalls, mailings and information ongrief workshops and support groupsoffered throughout our 18county service area.
All bereavement servicesoffered by The Hospice ofEast Texas are open toanyone dealing with theloss of a loved one,whether that person was ahospice patient or not, andall services are offered to
ourcommunitiesfree of charge.
For currentinformation onbereavementservices offered byHospice of EastTexas visit ourwebsite at www.hospiceofeasttexas.org.
W A Y S Y O U C A N H E L P
This edition ofLifeTimesabounds withexamples of “TheHospice of EastTexas Difference”,those things which
make this organization soextraordinary and which have been thehallmarks of its work for more than 25years.
Our staff feel “chosen” for this work, asJacob Cabrera does. Their skill anddedication results in thecompassionate, coordinated, clinicallyexpert care Pat Jones so eloquentlydescribes in her letter on page 1. At alltimes of the day and night and 365days a year, they serve in patients’residences (whether their privatehome, assisted living facility or nursinghome), in HomePlace, our state-of-the-art, in-patient hospice facility, or invarious hospitals in our 18 countyservice area.
Grady Stewart, whose service as abereavement volunteer is highlightedin this issue, is but one example of theextraordinary commitment our 250plus volunteers have to their work. In2007 they contributed 18,794 hours ofservice to The Hospice of East Texasand the patients and families we serve,bringing their many gifts to share withthose who need them. We are blessedto count among our volunteers anexceptional volunteer Board ofDirectors who give their expertise aslawyers, accountants, economists,physicians, clergy, educators, businessand community leaders, and above all,
patient family advocates. It is ourprivilege to list the names of ourvolunteers in this LifeTimes as a way torecognize and thank them for all theydo.
The cornerstone of the “Hospice ofEast Texas Difference” is ourcommitment to serve all who need ourcare. In part, this is a financialcommitment, and in part it is acommitment to quality, a willingnessto do whatever it takes to offer all ourpatients and families exceptionalservices. Admission staff work lateevenings to relieve a patient’s sufferingand a family’s anxiety about thejourney ahead. Pharmacists andpharmacy technicians fill prescriptionsfor patients with new needs at allhours. Staff and volunteers work withothers in the community to be sure adying adolescent and his family haveheat in their home. Volunteers takevacation days from their jobs to sit withpatients. Community support and yourdonations allow us to provide this“difference”, and to fulfill anextraordinary commitment. Everypatient receives the same exceptionalcare, regardless of their financialsituation and no patient family receivesa bill for basic services from TheHospice of East Texas.
Thank you for what you make possible.I am honored and humbled to be a partof an organization with a rich heritageand a bright horizon of opportunityof service to East Texas.
Marjorie ReamPresident/CEO
a note from Marjia note from MarjiSharon SenterNelda ShankCarolyn SherrellRichard SmithFran SonkaDorothyStracenerPeggy SullivanChris TeepleTheola ThedfordCliff ThomasonMarilynTrollingerLori VickJude VurgasonEllen WallaceNancy WarrenMary WilkinsJerry WilliamsShelley Williams& RioNadineWilliamsonCarole WilsonPhyllis Wood
5 – 10 YEARSDot BradfordRubyBreckenridgeOtis BrooksLes BurkettCathy GibbonsFrances HarrellJuanna HudsonVema HydeMarguerite JonesCathy LinneyCathy LittlePat MaxwellJohnnie ParkerDoris SearsRosemarySlaytonJanet SquiresGrady StewartLee StewartSuzy StewartWandaSummerfordEvelyn Tate
Emilie TiermanMary UptonBob WaldmanLarry WhitisAnita WilkersonVida Wooten
10 – 15 YEARSDorotha BurgeRosalee BurnsRamona ClarkNeta HannaChris LoederKenneth MelvinDonna MorrisFrances ReidBea SchroederBernie WoodfordVena Woods
15 PLUS YEARSJean AllenIrene CundiffMargie HallChuck HaworthLavonn HiggsJann McGaugheyMaudean West
STUDENTVOLUNTEERSErin CampChelsea CohenCorey CruzCaitlin DeanJazmyne JohnsonKatrina JohnsonJeff KleinJamie LehmanKendallMcAllisterStephenMorrisonBrittany ReedKelcy ScibaTaylor TennisonChauncieThompsonJake VinsonJaredYoungblood
HOET volunteers
board of directorsboard of directors
Marjorie ReamPRESIDENT/CEO
Myanh BuiVICE PRESIDENT OF FINANCE
Danny HardmanVICE PRESIDENT OF
CLINICAL OPERATIONS
Nancy LamarVICE PRESIDENT OF
COMMUNITY RELATIONS
Janet BrandDIRECTOR OF
PROFESSIONAL OUTREACH
Shane LeeDIRECTOR OF
FACILITIES MANAGEMENT
Kurt LorenzDIRECTOR OF PHARMACY
Susan MayfieldDIRECTOR OF INPATIENT CARE
Christine MorawskiDIRECTOR OF
COMMUNITY OUTREACH & DEVELOPMENT
Christi MorrisDIRECTOR OF
INFORMATION MANAGEMENT
Kristy MorrisDIRECTOR OF
OUTPATIENT CARE
leadership teamleadership team
Glenn CollinsCHAIRMAN
Tim AlexanderVICE CHAIRMAN
Holly BoydSECRETARY
David NelsonTREASURER
Margo AdamsSissy Austin
Britt BrookshireTaylor Burns
Jeannette CalhounMary Ann Cozby
Bob EvansGenny HoraneyKeith Ingram
Mary Elizabeth JacksonRick Jett (Ex Officio)
Mel Lovelady
Dr. Jonathan MacClementsDr. Michael MassarJennifer McLeodDebbie RoosthRay ThompsonMarty Wiggins
4111 University Blvd | Tyler, Texas 75701903-266-3400 | 800-777-9860www.hospiceofeasttexas.org
Non profitCommunity Service Since 1982
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US Postage
P a i D
Tyler, Texas
Permit No. 168
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