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you need Carolinas Hospital System. When someone you love needs emergency care... It could be a fall in the home for an older person. Chest pain for a boomer. A car crash for a teenager. Spiking fever for a baby. Or so many other things. Whatever the cause, when someone you love needs emergency care, you need Carolinas Hospital System. The Emergency Department at Carolinas Hospital System offers a highly experienced medical team under the direction of Dr. William Cauthen, a 15-year veteran of emergency care at Carolinas. With shorter wait times, a calmer atmosphere and cutting-edge technology, the Emergency Department at Carolinas Hospital System is your destination. Discover the Carolinas difference. 805 Pamplico Highway Florence, South Carolina (843) 674-5000 www.carolinashospital.com She Magazine www.shemagazine.com Volume 7 • Issue 11 HAPPY NEW ( AND IMPROVED) YOU ! JANUARY 2010 She She MAGAZINE ...it’s a woman thing! CH- CH- CH- CH- CHANGES - THEY DID IT; SO CAN YOU! MEET THE WOMEN IN OUR LIFESTYLE TRANSFORMATION STORIES HEALTHY WEIGHT LOSS RESOLUTIONS - (THAT ARE KEEPABLE!) HOW’D SHE DO THAT? ONE WOMAN’S RECIPE FOR REACHING ONE-HUNDRED IT'S ABOUT TIME - WHAT’S THE BIGGEST TIME-WASTER IN YOUR LIFE, AND WHAT WILL YOU DO ABOUT IT THIS YEAR? HERE’S TO BETTER RELATIONSHIPS IN THE NEW YEAR - THE DEBUT OF ASK DR. AVIE BEAUTY BUZZ - HELP FOR DRY, WINTER SKIN HAPPY NEW (AND IMPROVED) YOU! cover spread JAN 2010 12/16/09 2:48 PM Page 1
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cover spread JAN 2010

12/16/09

2:48 PM

Page 1

When someone you love needs emergency care...

She...its a woman thing!

She MagazineHAPPY NEW ( AND IMPROVED) YOU HAPPY NEW ( AND IMPROVED) YOU !JANUA RY 2010

M A G A Z I N E

CH- CH- CH- CH- CHANGES THEY DID IT; SO CAN YOU! MEET THE WOMEN IN OUR LIFESTYLE TRANSFORMATION STORIES HEALTHY WEIGHT LOSS RESOLUTIONS (THAT ARE KEEPABLE!) HOWD SHE DO THAT? ONE WOMANS RECIPE FOR REACHING ONE-HUNDRED

IT'S ABOUT TIME WHATS THE BIGGEST TIME-WASTER IN YOUR LIFE, AND WHAT WILL YOU DO ABOUT IT THIS YEAR? HERES TO BETTER RELATIONSHIPS IN THE NEW YEAR THE DEBUT OF ASK DR. AVIE BEAUTY BUZZ HELP FOR DRY, WINTER SKIN

you need Carolinas Hospital System.Chest pain for a boomer. A car crash for a teenager. Spiking fever for a baby. Or so many other things. Whatever the cause, when someone you love needs emergency care, you need Carolinas Hospital System. The Emergency Department at Carolinas Hospital System offers a highly experienced medical team under the direction of Dr. William Cauthen, a 15-year veteran of emergency care at Carolinas. With shorter wait times, a calmer atmosphere and cutting-edge technology, the Emergency Department at Carolinas Hospital System is your destination.

www.shemagazine.com

It could be a fall in the home for an older person.

Volume 7 Issue 11

Discover the Carolinas difference.805 Pamplico Highway Florence, South Carolina (843) 674-5000 www.carolinashospital.com

HAPPY NEW (AND IMPROVED) YOU!

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Dr. Joe L. Griffin Jr. DMD Dr. H.W. Herbert DMD Dr. John Hess DDS Dr. Christopher Mohler DDS Dr. Paula Haley DMD Specialist in Prosthodontics Visit

www.carolinasmile.comfor valuable offers

Call Now! 843-629-8000Which best describes you?I work all week and cant take off of work. I simply dont have time to get all the dental work I need. I fall somewhere between a little afraid to terrified of getting dental care. Its been so long since Ive been to a dentist, Im afraid I cant afford all the dental work I need.

If you checked one or more of the above...WE CAN HELP YOU!

NEW OFFICE HOURS! 2214 W. Palmetto St. Florence, SC 29501

Call Now! 843-629-8000

GET ACQUAINTED SPECIAL $99 EXAM Oral Exam, X-Rays & Gum Disease Screening Valid for new patients only!(On initial visit, valid thru Dec. 2009)

COMPLIMENTARY SAFE SLEEPY MEDICINE, MONITORING & AROMA THERAPY! You are not alone if you experience dental anxiety. We use simple tried and true calming methods.

SHE MAGAZINE SPECIAL FREE Whitening Trays Come in for X-Rays, cleaning and dental exam and you will receive custom whitening trays and bleach.(New patients only, valid thru Dec. 2009)

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Florence Wellness & Weight-loss Centerunder the direction of

Florences Only Certified Bariatrics Center

J. MARSHALL DENT, M.D., FLORENCES ONLY BARIATRIC PHYSICIAN

NOW OFFERING FULL & MODIFIED FAST AS WELL AS OTHER PROGRAMS TAILORED TO YOUR INDIVIDUAL NEEDS

Ive lost over 59 POUNDS!Janice Huggins tells her story.

HER STORY... I was motivated to start a weight-loss program because I was tired of being tired and having no energy. I wanted to feel better about myself. A co-worker had been on a weight-loss program at Florence Wellness & Weight Loss Center for about two months, and she made it look simple. I decided to make an appointment to see Dr. Dent, and it was one of the best decisions Ive ever made. When I first talked to Dr. Dent, I told him about the problems I had losing weight. I could lose twenty pounds easily; but, after that, the weight loss would just stop. Discouraged, I would give up and gain the twenty pounds back. This was a continuous cycle. I had been on a high dose of hormone therapy for several weeks when I started seeing Dr. Dent. He talked to me about reducing the dose, and I immediately started crying. With the hormone therapy, I had stopped having hot flashes and was able to sleep all night without waking up. He saw how upset I was, and he immediately reassured me that he wouldnt change anything until I was ready and agreed to it. He took the time to explain to me, in detail, how balanced hormones affect the body and hinder weight loss. I traded in the oral hormones for a patch and began weaning myself to a lower and lower dose each time I changed the patch. I was completely off the patch in a couple weeks. At that time, Dr. Dent checked some labs and, of course, they were not in normal range. That day, I started with a monthly injection. The first injection was a miracle in itself. I had so much energy, I couldnt stand it. I dont mean an unnatural type of energy; it was the kind you have in your early 30s. I could think clearer, and I had a smile that wouldnt wipe off. I started walking on my treadmill and actually started running some. Before I knew it, I had dropped 40 pounds. I never knew how bad I did feel until I started feeling better. I was amazed at the difference that having my hormones balanced made in my weight loss and in my everyday life. I appreciate the knowledge Dr. Dent has about hormone therapy. It has made all the difference in the world. I started out at 223.5 pounds on May 4th, 2009. By September, I was down to 165 pounds. Ive maintained my weight since then. Ive lost a total of 58.5 pounds. And, you can do it, too. Youll have all the support and motivation you need with this program. Take the challenge and the chance. You have nothing to lose except your unwanted weight.

after before

Top 10 reasons to chooseFlorence Wellness and Weight-loss Center1. The ONLY board certified bariatric physician in the Pee Dee 2. The ONLY certified Bariatric Center in the Pee Dee 3. The most cost effective program in the Pee Dee 4. Individual programs tailored to your needs and the flexibility to change programs 5. Thorough metabolic laboratory evaluation on every patient 6. The knowledge and experience to offer hormone balancing to enhance weight loss 7. Bonafide maintenance program once goal weight is obtained 8. Each patient seen by physician every visit 9. All inclusive plans (no hidden cost) 10. Flexible hours and late hours to better accommodate your schedule

See Dr. Dents article on pg. 106

Complete Womens Health CareJ. Marshall Dent, M.D.Member of North American Menopausal Society Member of American Bariatrics Physicians

410 South Coit Street Florence 665.5055

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DIAGNOSIS:

Lung Cancer

PROGNOSIS:

Recovering well and spending quality time with her husband.Jeannie Funderburk with Dr. Michael Gibson.

In the summer of 2009, longtime Hartsville residentJeannie Funderburk went to her doctor with allergy symptoms. But after a chest x-ray revealed a spot on her lung, Jeannie was referred to Carolinas Hospital System (CHS). After her case was thoroughly reviewed, the CHS Tumor Board diagnosed Jeannie with Stage One Lung Cancer. While the cancer diagnosis was certainly a shock, Jeannie was comforted by the professionalism of the CHS team. They explained everything they were doing and why, she stated. We were able to make really informed decisions. Fortunately, Jeannie was a perfect candidate for the VATS (Video-Assisted Thorascopic Surgery) Lobectomy. Using this advanced, less invasive procedure, Dr. Michael Gibson successfully removed one lobe of the lung through a two inch incision with the assistance of a camera. This is the same technology used for laparoscopic gallbadder surgery. Its good to know that we have this caliber program in Florence, Jeannie said.

After the surgery, she and her husband received the kind of compassionate, thoughtful care that CHS is known for. The doctors are very knowledgeable, thorough and conscientious, she said. Everyone took really good care of us. Today, Jeannie is feeling great and doing what she loves most: spending quality time with her husband. She sums up her experience perfectly: My husband was by my side every step of this journey. And thanks to the entire CHS team, Im going to be by his side for many more years to come. For more information on the VATS Lobectomy, please call (843) 676-2760.

All the technology. All the heart. All the time.

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Relief for Children & Adults from: Hay Fever Asthma Skin Allergy Sinus Problems Bee & Fire Ant Allergy Sinus Endoscopy CT Scans

Allergy Asthma & Sinus CenterWith Help From DOCTORS who CAREJoseph Moyer, M.D., FACAAI Danny Douglas, M.D. H. David Stone, Jr.,M.D., ACAAI Timothy Crouch, M.D. Stephen A. Imbeau, M.D., FACP, FAAAAI, FACAAI

Call Toll Free 1-800-253-6697

McLeod Medical Plaza 800 E Cheves St Suite 420 Florence 679-9335

Carolina Pines Medical Ofc. Bldg. 701 Medical Park Dr. Suite 104 Hartsville 332-3191

Tuomey Medical Building 115 N. Sumter St. Suite 400 Sumter 803-934-1488

South Strand Medical Center 5046 Hwy. 17 Bypass S. Suite 105 Myrtle Beach 293-5000

Seacoast Medical Center 4000 Hwy. 9 E. Suite 240 Little River 399-9033

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The Art of Style

843-292-0150 www.gallowayandmoseley.com

2000 Block of Hoffmeyer Road Florence, SC

843.656.0399

the toy shopExperience a Truly Unique, Upscale Shopping and Dining Experiencespecializing in creative and educational playthings

MAG FORMERS AUTOMOBLOX & MORE EZY ROLLER

CYNTHIA ladies fine shoes843-661-7474 Mon-Sat 10-6

843-664-8383

ButlersFINE MENS CLOTHING843-667-9671 www.butlersfineclothing.com

Glo Minerals . Pureology . Redken Keratin Complex System . Brocato

the plazaAN ELITE SALONOur Stylists/Color Specialists: Tammy Chapman-owner, Lois Still, Becky Cooper, Steve Connell, Anna Mcpherson, Kathy Hutchinson, Ashley Turner

CYNTHIAladies fine apparel843-665-7669 Mon-Sat 10-6

Call Tiffany for your appointment today.

843.665.5668

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Our Assisted Livingis a picture of the top of the line...where it feels like family and where you know your loved one will be in the best care. We feature professional staff and the best living accommodations for your family member. At PEE DEE GARDENS, your loved one is in the best of hands.

Call Shannon Berg & inquire about our friendly assisted living today! CALL TODAY FOR A CONFIDENTIAL ASSESSMENT AND TOUR.3117 West Palmetto St. / Florence 843-667-6699

www.peedeegardens.com

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Are You Ready to Lose Weight?WE OFFER CUSTOMIZED WEIGHT MANAGEMENT PROGRAMS!

Physician Monitored Weight-Loss Plan Prescription Strength Appetite Suppressant Fat-Burning B12 Injections to Increase your Metabolism

A Healthy, Gorgeous You Awaits...OTHER SERVICES INCLUDE:

CALL TODAY FOR YOUR CONSULTATION!

We offer

SmartLipo

TM

The Revolutionary Alternative to Liposuction!Facials and Sugar-Scrub Exfoliation & Hydrating treatment Dermaplaning with Mini-Facial Obagi Nu-Derm Rx Skin Care products Chemical Peels: Skin Medica Vitalize & Illuminize and Obag'is Blue Peel Full Body Waxing, including Brazilian Bikini Treatment of Leg Spider Veins and Facial Spider veins Laser Skin Tightening for face and neck Acne Treatment plan for DRAMATIC improvements -- teens and adult Photo-Dynamic Therapy for Sun Damage Active Acne Permanent Makeup Latisse - Rx only lash growth technology Rejuvenize Peel, which can give excellent results without the expence and downtime of lasers

Nancy Windham, M.D.

Windham Aesthetics509 S. Coit Street Florence, SC 843-676-1435 843-667-1919

Susan Zavell, R.N., B.S.N.,Licensed Esthetician

www.windhamaesthetics.com

|

www.myheavenlyskin.com

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She january 10Happy New (And Improved) You!in every issue 14 16 28 34 36 41 42-43 48 51 57 60 64 68 70 72 100 102Letter from the Editor She mail In His Own WordsRobin Thompson

Shop TalkEastern Carolina Medicine

contributing writers 22 26 30 32 38 44 52 67 114Jumana A. SwindlerWouldnt It Be Wonderful If...

The Sir-Vey The World According toHolly Young Beaumier

feature stories 76 78 80 82 84-85 86 88 90 92 94 96 98Polly Jones Billie Jo Pilotte Courtney Sullivan Joan Shelley Helan & Randy Ellis Bree Boyce Lesley Kirby, AuD Brenda Jacobs Ashley Hanna Glenette Eaddy Jessica McQuage Mary Lee Summerford Maxwell

Marti MillerExercising Futility

Women at WorkToni McGiboney, RN, BSN

Cookie CawthonOut of Africa

Shes Closet Chick LitEmily Phillips

Ferebe GasqueA Time of New Beginnings

She Wants to Know What Advertisers SayFirst Impressions

Latrelle P. Fowler, RN, PhD, Life CoachIts About Time!

Anna K. PittsSay Yes to the Dress!

Wee SheEmily Frances SantiAnna

Paige Self ThomasWhy You Love Me So

Fabulous Finds Wings for the SpiritSherry S. Page Atkinson

Ouida K. Page, RN, LPCOut With the Old, In With the New!

And She Cooks,Too! Purse StringsAngela Polk

Molly SymonsDive In to Being Fit: At Any Age!

Chicks of the MonthThe Pathology Service Associates Billing Team in Florence

medical experts 62 104 106 122Edward Buddy Scearce, Psy. D.The Emotional Energy Crisis

108 110 112 116 118 120 128

SheroKaren Galloway

There She Goes Whats She Doing? Ask Dr. AvieAvie J. Rainwater, III, PhD, ABPP

Krista M. Kozacki, MDA New Year, A New You

J. Marshall Dent, III, MDWhy Do I Gain Weight Every Time I Eat?

Beauty Buzz Mary UnmarriedMary R. Dittman, MBA

Dr. Maria RecioThe Power to Prevent Stroke

Whos That Girl?Alexis Reid Johnson

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She Magazine January 2010 13

She

M e l ia F l o w e r s B e r r y aPublisher/Editor [email protected]

Tuesday Taylor

we are

General Manager Advertising & Graphic Design [email protected]

Dresden TuckerGraphic Design [email protected]

Thanks To Our Past, Present, And Future Customers For Keeping Us Florences #1 Jeweler.

Le ig h C l a r y A b d o u gProduction Manager Advertising & Design [email protected]

Heather FrickEditorial Assistant / Advertising [email protected]

Quality Jewelers Since 1948

A sh l e y R o g e r sGraphic Design [email protected]

Beverly Kelly Ray Gasque

- Executive Assistant

- Distribution Manager - Distribution

Jacob Tucker

...Always Dancing and Creating Performance Memories to last a lifetime!

She

mail

RAISING THE STANDARD!The Kelleys Fine GYM PIZZ Art Extreme A P JAN ARTY Team performs . 29 TH Raise It Up 6-9p m Op for the Festival for a en Gym 2 1/2 ges 2 of Trees 2009. hrs -12pizza of gym t & dr inks ime

E m a i l t o : e d i t o r @shemagazine.com Mail to: 609 North Main Street Marion, SC 29571 Call us: 843.423.2393 office line 843.423.9837 fax line

take us homeFor a copy to be placed in your mailbox, send a check or money order for $38 to the above address for a year's subscription.

She Magazine is published monthly and distributed at over 500 locations throughout the Pee Dee. She Magazine reserves the right to refuse any advertisement or content we deem inappropriate for the publication. Editorial contributions are welcome and will be considered by the editor. Please include name, address and contact number (email [email protected]). Letters to the Editor may require editing due to space limitations. The design, editorial and photo content in of

Flying High Academy/KFA is now enrolling for: cheerleading, tumbling, high school cheerleading programs, private tumbling, and all star cheerleading for info call: 877-982-4337 or 803-513-3755

629-0033 or 374-4KFAFlorence Lake City Olanta

She is copyright

She Magazine and may not be reproduced without written permission by the publisher. She Magazine is a registered trademark.

HOME OF THE KFA DANCE COMPANY

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letter from the editor:JANUARY 2010

Happy New (and Improved) You!not making exercise a priority. When I realized I had to start taking care of myself, I slowly began to find ways to fit exercise back into my life. It hasnt been easy, and I have gone through phases of dedication and periods where I couldnt find the time or willpower. Thankfully, the hiatus was always short-lived as my body reminded me how much better I felt when exercising, and that was motivation to get moving again. Alas, as the New Year approaches, I have, again, begun to ask myself the question that millions ask each year, What can I do to improve the quality of my life? As someone who has always made Resolutions and broken most everyone Ive ever made, Ive learned a few things about setting goals at least those that follow the phrase,This year I will . . . Instead, I choose to say,This year, I will try to . . . And, to increase my chance of actually doing what I will try to do, I limit it to one or two things instead of the list that is long enough to be mistaken for something that Santa left behind. This year, I simply want to kick my Diet Pepsi addiction and add Pilates to my workout routine (while keeping my relationship going strong with the elliptical). What about you? If cultivating a healthier new and improved you is your goal for 2010, you are in the right place. What provides more inspiration than learning about an actual persons success? Nothing, I say. For this Annual Health and Fitness Issue, HAPPY NEW (AND IMPROVED) YOU, we chose an eclectic bunch of women who, through various means, have made lifestyle transformations. Some did it the old-fashioned way and on their own; others sought the support, advice and resources of weight loss and fitness professionals. All achieved success. Read their stories and decide for yourself which route you think will work best for you. Or, you may gain inspiration and come up with your own plan. Beyond health and fitness goals, I have been burdened for some time with the realization that Im not utilizing the awesome resource I have in this magazine to help others to the fullest. . . .When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required (Luke 12-48). With She Magazine, I have been entrusted with much and much is expected of me in return. (I hear You Lord, and I'm working on it). My staff and I are working to establish She CARES in which we will tap into She Magazine ability to reach thousands to raise awareness of non-profit organizations within our area whose purpose is to help the disadvantaged and numerous other important causes. If you are working for the good of others and would like She to join your cause in 2010, send an e-mail to [email protected] with SheCARES in the subject. I am very excited about the coming year! Just saying 2010 sounds intriguing. I feel like a breath of fresh air has been breathed into She Magazine even as we prepare to enter our eighth year. I have been blessed with a renewed sense of excitement for my work, which has been a God-send. We have added two new IN EVERY ISSUE features. Mary Unmarried by Mary R. Dittman, MBA, is proving to be quite a provocative account of singledom. The first column was printed last month and has already produced quite a bit of She mail. ASK DR. AVIE, authored by Dr. Avie Rainwater, PhD, ABPP, debuts this month and gives our readers the opportunity to write in anonymously with questions about relationships and men to get a mans perspective on things women care about. Looking ahead, in February, Lisa Hudson, a local vocal talent will join our fabulous lineup of contributing writers to bring us a look at a local artist each month. Some time ago, a reader made the comment to me that She Magazine has life, saying, She breathes. That was one of the most touching things anyone has ever said to me about She. I often think about that comment. And, believing that it is true, She breathes, I realize that you our readers make it come alive. With your letters and comments and interaction through the stories you share, She does breathe! We really are a family our Staff, our Readers, our Advertisers were all connected through this magazine. It is my prayer, for each of you, that this New Year will bring you Health, Happiness, Peace and Love. Like a pretty new journal filled with clean, crisp pages, twelve new months lie ahead. I feel giddy at the thought of all that we can dream, explore and create with each new issue. Ah, the possibilities! Happy New Year! Enjoy this issue . . . Its a woman thing!

Thats the question Im struggling with as this lazy Sunday comes to an end. The exercise angel sitting on my right shoulder says,Yes, do it! You know youll feel better afterwards. The enemy on my left shoulder coaxes, Ah, come on. You worked out three times this week. Thats not so bad. Besides, think about how good this chair feels. The lights are down, candles are lit, and the glow from the Christmas tree adds to the tranquility of the room. The odds are definitely stacked up against me moving from this chair. I would like to say Im one of those (very few) people who love to work out. However, Im not and the struggle taking place in my mind is one that plays out most every day. Very rarely is it because Im being a couch potato or, as I am in this moment, a chair potato. The opposite is usually the case. Im busy! I get home from work and rush to cook dinner, all the while doing laundry and tidying up around the house. Then, most evenings, I go to check on my mother before rushing home to change into my workout clothes. By then, Im tired, and my elliptical machine begins to look like a torture device. My heart desires to get a bath and snuggle up on the sofa for the rest of the evening. And, as much as my mind and body do not want to go 40 minutes on the elliptical, they know its what I need and theyll both thank me when its over. The truth is; that elliptical machine is the best gift I ever gave myself. After continued frustration over not being able to fit going to the gym into my crazy life, I broke down and made the investment last January. That piece of equipment and I have become quite close. Through sweat and struggle, Ive worked off more stress and worked out more problems than a shrink in a beauty parlor. All through the winter months last year, I remained faithful and worked out from four to five nights per week. Then, when summer rolled around, I began wogging (walking and jogging) until the herniated disk in my back decided it had enough of the pavement pounding. So, it was Hello, old friend, elliptical once again. Although Im honest in saying Im not a lover of the actual act of exercising, I do love the way it makes me feel afterwards. I know that once Im done, my energy soars, Im calm and the stress of the day lessens somewhere between minute five and Yah!, Im done. I aim for five nights per week but usually make it four and, occasionally, like this week, only manage to fit in three. Ive learned to accept that three workouts are better than no workouts. An off-week, however, is not an excuse to take the month off; its reason to try harder to fit that extra day in next week. Honestly, I get scared when I start to slip because there was a long period in my life, in the early years of She Magazine, when I cheated myself and my health by

To work out or not to work out?

Melia Flowers Berry

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She Magazine January 2010 15

The Kings AcademyMind, Body, Spirit...Educating the Whole Student

Do you have questions about

The Kings Academy?Join us for "Getting to Know Us Night" Thursday, January 28th 6:30 pm at the Fine Arts and Athletic Facility. 4K-12th Grade Teachers will be available to discuss curriculum, spiritual life, fine arts and athletic opportunities offered at The King's Academy. TKA is an independent, Christ-centered 4K-12th grade school offering Honors, College Prep and Dual-credit classes.

Accredited by SCISA (South Carolina Independent School Association) Member of ACSI (Association of Christian Schools International)

843.661.7464 1015 S. Ebenezer Rd. Florence www.tkaflorence.comTKA does not discriminate on the basis of race, gender, national or ethnic origin.

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Dear

MAIL SheShe,Dear

I love what you do every month with She Magazine! And, now Im a fan of Mary Unmarried the new feature by Mary Dittman. Its hard being single at our age, and I can relate to what she says. Im glad you thought about us single ladies.Sincerely,

She,

I am a big fan of She Magazine! I love the layout and design. Its colorful and edgy, and the artwork on the front is always great. The articles are so meaningful to women. And, because it features locals, I think it fosters a great She community. The advertising is applicable things we want and things I didnt even know were available. Plus, through She Magazine, Ive found out about more specialty shops and items than I ever knew existed in this area. I think She Magazine is a great platform for building awareness of sensitive and important topics. I feel like I know She and her Staff (as Im sure most of your readers do). Its like one of our friends publishes it. But, even so, Im still amazed and thankful that we still get She Magazine for free!

Melissa Bartick Brown, Hartsville, SC Dear

She,

I love She Magazine! Is there anywhere in Robeson County, North Carolina, that your wonderful magazine is distributed? I like to read the personal stories and look at the girly-girl advertisements. Ive been to several stores that were advertised in She Magazine and made purchases. Thanks,

Last but surely not least I believe that you believe in what you are doing. The entire tone of She its articles and ads are connected, meaningful and, many times, blessings. Thanks for the product you all put out.Im a Sales/Marketing Manager for Coca-Cola, and I enjoy selling it every day because I believe in it and know its a good product. I imagine the same is true of the She Team. I envision good friends, having great times and enjoying their work when I think of what it must be like at the She office. Blessings to You All and Happy, Happy Holidays!

Jennie Lee, Robeson County, NC Dear

Sincerely,

She,Dear

Nicole Cribbs, Florence, SC

I enjoy the articles in She Magazine every month. The story about Rebecca Smith in the Novembers Remarkable Women Issue was really good. I know Rebecca personally, and she is a great person and a good friend. I hope you will continue the good work with She by printing stories about people we know.

She,

My husband and I really enjoy She Magazine. The articles and pictures are great! We scurry around eachmonth just to find one; they disappear quickly. I like being informed about not only Florence but surrounding towns, as well. Keep up the good work! Sincerely, Judy Port, Florence, SC

Annie Goff, Florence, SC Become Friends with us on Facebook!

{

Send an E-MAIL to [email protected] or MAIL us at 609 N. Main St., Marion, SC 29571

}

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She Magazine January 2010 17

The Earring Lady These earrings are hand crafted in Florence from American materials and sold by galleries nationwide Here you will find the largest selection and this is the only place to buy discounted seconds Many new styles this season

Van ELi J. Rene A. Marinelli La Plume Onex BCB Girls Luichiny Jessica Simpson Carlos Santana Jeffery Cambell Jack Rogers Everybody Dansko Ara Trotters Soft Spots Naturalizer Helle Comfort Tsubo Daniel Green Poetic License Ros Hammerson And More!

2717 Second Loop Road Florence(Look for the Lavender House)

Monday- Saturday 10:00-6:00843-317-17321806 W. Palmetto St. Florence 843-662-9781

A new year has unfolded Have you made your resolutions? Let us help you reach your gaols atGRIFFIN PLASTIC SURGERY513 S. Dargan Street Florence (843) 664-1122MEMBER AMERICAN SOCEITY OF PLASTIC SURGEONS, INC.

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JAN 2010 In

Every Issue

1.

2.

Contributors Contributors

1. J. Marshall Dent, MD is Board Certified in Family Practice & Obstetrics and Gynecology and also holds an Advanced Certification in Menopausal Medicine. He can be contacted at Complete Womens Health Care in Florence. This month, in keeping with the health and fitness theme, Dr. Dent explains how insulin resistance leads to weight gain.

5 3 4

2. Avie

J. Rainwater, III, Ph.D., ABPP This month, She Magazine is happy to bring to our readers the debut of ASK DR. AVIE - A MANS PERSPECTIVE ON THINGS WOMEN CARE ABOUT. A Senior Partner of LifeCare Psychology Group, LLC, Dr. Avie J. Rainwater is the only Triple-Boarded Psychologist in SC, holding Specialty Certification in Clinical Psychology and Sub-Specialty Designations in both Biofeedback and Pain Management. He and his wife of 31 years, Karen, have three children together. Chelsea, Seth and Josh.

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3. Marti Miller lives and writes in Marion, SC. She cherishes her children, loves one man, tolerates the pets and thanks God every day for the many blessings bestowed by faith. And she has an overpowering urge to bake chocolate chip cookies right now. 4. Ouida K Page is a Licensed Professional and National Board Certified Counselor with a Bachelors Degree in Nursing and is a member of the International Honor Society of Nursing. She specializes in families and issues relating to children, adolescents and women of all ages. 5. Cookie

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Cawthon is wild about her family. She totally digs serving as a greeter at NewSpring Church every week, and she flat out loves reading, writing, speaking, teaching, and blogging www.cookiecawthon.com.

6. Jumana Swindler is the Director of Marketing and Public Relations for McLeod Health. Her personal favorite pastimes, reflected in her writings, are RV'ing, movies,Theater, fishing, reading and spending time with her son and family. 7. Ferebe Gasque is looking forward to the opportunities that 2010 will bring. She loves her work at McLeod Hospice House, selling Pampered Chef Kitchen tools, and writing for She Magazine. Friends and fans can reach her at [email protected]. 8. Sherry Page Atkinson lives in Marion with her husband, Jimmy. This month in Wings for the Spirit, she asks the question, Will This Be The Year?

In12.

This Issue

Robin Thompson lets us know what men think about the topic of weight loss in N HIS OWN WORDS this month as he talks about his own experience. A lifelong resident of Florence, Robin is the Director of Music & Organist at Main Street United Methodist Church of Dillon.He is a graduate of Francis Marion University & Coker College. Robin sings with the Masterworks Choir and has served as Musical Director and Accompanist for over 50 productions at the Florence Little Theatre. He is currently directing the music & playing piano for The Fantasticks, the musical which will open at FLT on January 15, directed by Scarlett Knight.13. Angela Polk This months author of PURSE STRINGS, works in Florence Office of WebsterRogers, LLP, and is a Manager for Wealth Management and Tax Services. She also provides ProSystem Support. She obtained her Undergraduate Degree from Francis Marion University and her Masters Degree in Accountancy from the University of South Carolina. 14. Donna Squires is a skin care specialist at Dr. David Chapmans office in Florence, where she lives with her husband Jay and daughter Kelsey. Donna answers this month's Beauty Buzz Question which relates to keeping skin healthy and moisturized in the winter.

9. Anna

lives in Florence, SC. She is currently pursuing her career as a School Library Media Specialist and loving every minute of the journey! This month, Anna continues to write about her upcoming wedding and fitting into her dream dress.

Pitts

10. Paige

Self Thomas lives in Florence with her husband, Joey, and two Sheltie children,Timmy and Buddy. Together, Paige and Joey have seven grown children. She works part-time as Business Administrator for the Francis Marion University Center for the Child and is a Licensed Realtor with Prudential Segars in Florence.

11. Mary Dittman, MBA, is an Instructor of Marketing and Director of the Internship Program in the School of Business at Francis Marion University. She consults for a variety of local and regional companies and is actively involved in the Florence community. Her new column Mary Unmarried is catching on quite quickly.

15. Latrelle Fowler, RN,PhD and Life Coach, lives in Florence with her husband, Tony. For this issue, we asked Latrelle to tackle the issue of TIME. In her article,What Is the BIGGEST TIME-WASTER in Your Life, And What Will You do About It This Year?, she offers advice on making the most of your time in New Year.16. Edward Scearce, Psy.D., also known as Buddy is a Licensed Psychologist practicing in Florence. He specializes in treating depression, anxiety, marriage, and family issues and chronic pain. Dr. Scearce joined LifeCare Psychology Group in 2009 after moving to Florence with his family. He enjoys family time, college football and reading. 17 Krista M. Kozacki, MD is Board Certified in Family Medicine. She is affiliated with Florence Health Care, PA, and is a member of the medical staff at Carolinas Hospital System. Her article, New Year, New - Healthy Weight Loss Resolutions can you help cut through the fads and get real results. 18. Molly Symons shares her experience of fitness through swimming and winning two gold medals in the Senior Olympics while doing so.

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Artist Spotlight19. Collin Smith is repsonsible for the fabulous after shots for the women in this months feature stories. A portrait and wedding photographer based out of Florence, Collin launched the $100 Portrait Project that donates 50% of its revenue to the Childrens Miracle Network & stays in the Florence area. He is also the man behind the creative photos in the CYNTHIA ads. cmsmithportraits.com

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Wouldnt It Be Wonderful If...Sincerely Yours, Jumana A. Swindlerust when I felt comfortable writing "2009" on all my correspondences or checks, it's apparently time to change the date to 2010. Now dont get me wrong. Being around for this new decade is certainly better than the alternative. And besides, I do love the number Ten. My old college sweetie had that number on his intramural baseball jersey. He wasn't really a good athlete, but he was a great sport. (And forget any ideas of matchmaking out there; he's a happily married investment banker up north now. It never would have worked anyway. I hate dealing with math figures and I love the south. He travels to Europe once a year and I rather enjoy RV roving around the country when I get a chance. It would have been a big disconnect, except for the fact that we both love to eat. Once, he ordered a His and Her Steak Dinner special just for himself.) At any rate, it's a New Year, and whole new decade in the new millennium.That means lots of opportunities to make changes and get things better than ever. So I would like us all to consider at least ten new ventures as part of 2010 to wish for and try to be a part of as we improve ourselves and the world around us. Wouldn't it be wonderful .. Number 1 if this year, we could all AFFORD to buy the car of our dreams, (a convertible BMW in my case) and it wouldnt wear out, require gas, repairs or any attention, except what you give it behind the wheel or the stares it may bring you while you drive it around friends. Number 2 if carrots were made this year to taste like chocolate, bacon or butter pecan ice cream flavors. And, better yet , says Erin Faile, my Weight Watcher partner, "What if they could make chocolate taste like carrots - - so we wouldnt crave it as much!" Number 3 if people in Florence actually stopped at red lights instead of pretending they are yellow and proceed driving straight through them at local intersections. Number 4 if The Lifetime Movie Channel never aired reruns or commercials. And, just how many times are they going to show "The Notebook" or "The Woman Next Door" this year? Number 7 if there was a side road set apart for fearful and cowardly navigators like me, so you would never have to drive down I-95 to get anywhere. Number 8 if money actually did grow on trees, the way your mother said you thought when you were a kid. Number 9 if smart manufacturers could make dress shoes that are as comfortable as tennis shoes or flip flops for both men and women and pantyhose that always fit and never run. Number 10 And on a serious note, wouldnt it be wonderful if we could really eradicate disease, eliminate poverty, preserve the dignity of all life and create a climate of compassion and respect for each other around the world. Number 10 and One-Half. And wouldnt it be wonderful if number 10 could really be achieved in 2010 or one day soon. Happy New Year to All Our Readers. John 6:35Jumana A. Swindler, a resident of Florence, is the Director of Marketing and Public Relations for McLeod Health. Her personal favorite pastimes, reflected in her writings, are RV'ing, movies,Theater, fishing, reading and spending time with her son and family.

J

Number 5 if it did not rain on the very same afternoon that you retrieve your pooch from the groomer. (This, for me, is every Friday.) Despite sunny skies everywhere else in the Great Pee Dee Region, there is always a sudden torrential shower or downpour overhead just at the pick-up time and place when my dog is clean and freshened up.And, when it's not raining,Vegas, my pup, skillfully romps through the very part of the yard where there happens to be one puddle, no matter how big the surrounding acreage is. Number 6 if the nation and president quit bickering about all the political stuff going on in Washington and just got down to the basics of what we all need and want. If they would pass one bill that essentially fits the criteria for everyone's work and school schedule. Congress, since it seems responsible for everything in our lives lately, should make it mandatory that we all have a three day weekend - one to do all the stuff needed around the house, one day to play and one day to worship. Choose the order that you prefer.

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2010 Pro BowlMiami Fl. $350pp hotel/bus/prime ticket. January 30-31st.UPCOMING EVENTSValentine Dinner Trip for 2 (February 13, 2010) $125 (per-couple) NY Shoppng & Tour (March 18-21) $299pp(2) $275pp(3) $245pp (4) Disney Trip (June 13-15,2010) $285pp(2)$265pp(3)$245pp(4) Essence Music Festival (July 2-5, 2010) $495pp(2)$395(3) Labor Day Weekend Nassau/Freeport Bahamas Cruise from Charleston, SC Sept. 1-6, 2010, $395pp-IN, $425-OV **All trips include Motor Coach transportation.**

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Let Old Man Winter

Toot His Horn...

Winter Must-Haves:Cute, colorful coats Cozy tunic sweaters Spanx tights AG legging jeans Joes black ponte legging jeans Frye boots Love quotes scarves

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Exercising Futility: Letting WHAT IF Run You Raggedby Marti MillerNew Year being pulled from the calendar oven! Is there any better scent in this world? Well, maybe.Theres always some healthy competition from bathed and powdered baby and brand new car interior (okay, or truck) and ooey-gooey chocolate chip cookies cooling on a tray. Nothing scents up a room like the first page of a new year though. It brings with it freshly-picked resolutions and clean slates galore. But wait WHAT IF this New Year brings the scent of troubles anew? WHAT IF I cant lose those holiday pound cakes hanging off my inner thighs? WHAT IF theres too much month left at the end of my money when the Christmas bills arrive? WHAT IF this new love I cherish beyond words disappears as quickly as it arrived because the doubting words wont stop spewing from my mouth? WHAT IF my son does not return from Afghanistan? WHAT IF he returns broken? WHAT IF he returns changed and angry? WHAT IF I cant keep up with the aerobics class after a self-destructive one month break? WHAT IF I have a heart attack trying? WHAT IF my friends forget about me because its winter and the pool waters too cold (and leafy)? WHAT IF those two great people decide not to be one anymore? WHAT IF my daughter doesnt call at the anticipated time? WHAT IF I burn the grits? WHAT IF theyre lumpy? WHAT IF I cant ever be southern enough to fit in here? WHAT IF I never know for sure what grits are? WHAT IF I lose my ability to find the humor in anything because Im so doggone determined to worry about every little (and big) WHAT IF that pops into my sorry brain? WHAT IF I continue to live on my feelings instead of my faith? WHAT IF God tires of my seeming inability to let go of this futile WHAT IF exercising? Its simply exhausting, this WHAT IF list seems to get longer each day. Try living inside my tiny little mind for a day or twopleaseIm so tired of me I could sleep for weeks. If only I could shut off that annoying, gnat-like WHAT IF tape playing in my head. As I attempt to attack this months topic, I am so focused on the WHAT IF exercises regarding my son (he deploys January 8th to Afghanistan prayers are appreciated) and my new love life (next months topic) and my friends lives (both northern and southern) that I am too tired to go to aerobics class the place where endorphins are released and peace descends for at least a few brief, breath-catching, sweaty moments. I missed the ENTIRE month of December. Lets not even discuss the upper arm flapping. Lets just say that the breezes created when I raise my arm to point or wave or reach out for something could cool off a hot pastrami sandwich in a heartbeat.

Ah, the sweet and wonderful smell of a freshly baked loaf of

Worry has been a relatively constant companion of mine for a very long time (yes, Im way old enough to make that statement).When I took a biblical self-confrontation class (several timesIm a slow study) and learned that it is a sin to fear and worry, it caused me to feel incredibly guilty as I continued to worry (slow learner, remember?) but decided to call it concern instead. It was still worry. I just renamed it so it wouldnt sound so ugly.When we allow fear and worry and WHAT IF thinking to cloud our faith, we do not give our Father his due. And then, as God would have it, something wonderful happened just in the nick (my sons name, by the way) of time, to allow me the grace to move away from exercising futility and running myself ragged.A friend who knew the struggle I was facing with the news about my sons deployment and the concern over possible relationship cracks, copied a Journey devotion page for me. It was entitled What If Vs. Who Is. Basically, it cautioned the reader to let go of WHAT IF thinking and remember who God is and what He can do. He is in charge.When we exercise the WHAT IF, we place ourselves in the drivers seat. We rob today of its joy by worrying about tomorrow or yesterday. God expects more of his children. He expects us to trust Him. Because it spoke so clearly to me, I shared it with the aerobics group at our Christmas party (nope, I didnt miss THAT event cranberry eggnog cheesecake hello?). Evidently, Im not the only one who lets WHAT IF thinking rule her life sometimes. Everybody wanted a copy. So that one shared page had a lovely ripple effect. God showed who He is through a friends kind gesture. The relationship cracks got fixed because we chose to look at our concerns through the filter of faith instead of listening only to the white noise of WHAT IF. God is who He says He is, if we just believe - and communicate biblically rather than emotionally. Or maybe we fought just so we could make up? Isnt that a song? Yes and what beautiful music it makes...and the older I get the more I wander off the topic. Plus, I tried to write a note with my car keys last month. Sorry.Too much information? But heres the troublesome undercurrent of exercising the futility of WHAT IF. It keeps coming at us. Even after grasping the reality of who is in charge, I slip back to WHAT IF thinking every day. Perhaps it is in this exercise that we have the chance to strengthen our faith muscles over and over again? I surely hope so. Meanwhile, I will seek the following verses for continued fuel: Romans 8:28, Matthew 6:33-34, I John 4:18, Philippians 4:6-9.Worry never illuminates anything. It only shadows our joy. May this year bring more joy than worry, more prayer than pain, and, please Lord, more love than loss.

Marti Miller lives and writes in Marion, SC. She cherishes her children, loves one man, tolerates the pets and thanks God every day for the many blessings bestowed by faith. And she has an overpowering urge to bake chocolate chip cookies right now.

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She Magazine January 2010 27

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IN his OWN WORDSWhile controlling weight can be one of the most difficult issues a person faces, I feel its even more difficult for women than men.

ROBIN THOMPSON feeling Fantastick

MY WEIGHTMy weight has been an issue for me since my teenage years. Now, as an adult and a musician, most of my time is spent seated at a piano or desk with very little physical activity. I also eat many meals later in the evening after rehearsals. Therefore, my weight rose gradually over time. I dont think that people has allowed my weight to influence their opinion of me adversely; Im simply seen as the overweight musician. I can remember, however, being hurt when a good friend asked me once if I had always been plump. What a horrible word to describe a person! My heaviest weight was when I graduated from Coker College in 1991 290 pounds. When I first started my job at Main Street in Dillon, I lost down to 225. But, the weight slowly crept back. And, in about two years time, I was back up to 265 pounds, where I stayed until the beginning of 2007. In the summer of 2006, I was attending the United Methodist Annual Conference at Wofford College. I was so short of breath from walking up and down the hills and stairs; I had no energy at all. After climbing a particularly steep set of steps, I experienced sharp pains in my arm. I was afraid that I was having heart problems. When I got back to Florence, I saw my doctor and had a stress test. Fortunately, I passed and no severe problem was diagnosed. Needless to say, the situation got my attention. I was on blood pressure medication and my cholesterol count was rising. Quickly approaching my 47th birthday, I knew I had to take control of my health and make some changes. I didnt want to say I was going on a diet for fear that I would fail. I began to watch how much food I was eating, and I started reducing that amount little by little. By the end of 2006, I had lost down to 250 pounds. At the beginning of 2007, I began weighing myself each morning. I tried not to eat between meals, and I eliminated second and third portions. By the summer of 2007, I was down to 225 pounds. I joined McLeod Health and Fitness Center and started walking and working out with the FitLinxx machines two to four times a week. By the end of 2007, I was down to 210 pounds. 2008 was quite a year! I finally reached one of my goals, which was to weigh less than 200 pounds. When I attended my 30th Class Reunion in July, I weighed 185 pounds the exact same amount I weighed when I graduated from West Florence High School in 1978. I have fluctuated between 190 and 195 since then, but my loss from 265 to 195 gives me a total loss of about 70 pounds. My main goal is to stay between 185 and 190, so Ive almost met my goal. The biggest challenge is to maintain the weight loss. Thankfully, I met this challenge for all of 2009. The most difficult thing about my weight loss journey is the fact that I love good food, and I enjoy eating. I will never be a salad or broccoli eater. Therefore, to maintain my desired weight, I must learn moderation in what I do eat and keep working with my exercise program. Taking control of my weight has given me more energy to do the things I love to do play for the musicals at Florence Little Theater and singing. I can also go on trips and walk and not feel like an old man. Another good thing about losing the weight is I dont mind looking in mirrors or at pictures of myself anymore. And, I thoroughly enjoy buying clothes again. However, the best thing about my accomplishment is that I feel good about my health. I enjoy my life and hope to have many, many more good years. While controlling weight can be one of the most difficult issues a person faces, I feel its even more difficult for women than men. Women are more aware of being overweight and are more adversely affected because society is less accepting of overweight women. Men are big guys, but women are fat. That attitude isnt fair. The show Im preparing for right now, The Fantasticks, is about a young girl and young boy maturing and learning the ways of the world in an effort to find happiness. As the young couple learns, there are many important issues that people must face. And, although I hope that a person's happiness is not controlled by his or her size, if controlling your weight can make you happier, then make every effort to be the size you would like to be. My encouragement to others faced with being overweight is this: just make a start and try. There will be times when you fail and have to begin again, but dont stop. Slow progress is the best progress. If I can control my weight, you can, too.Robin Thompson, a lifelong resident of Florence, is the Director of Music and Organist at Main Street United Methodist Church of Dillon, a position he has held since 1991. Robin is a graduate of Francis Marion University and Coker College. An active local musician, Robin sings with the Masterworks Choir and has served as Musical Director and Accompanist for over 50 productions at the Florence Little Theatre. He is currently directing the music and playing piano for The Fantasticks, the musical which will open at FLT on January 15, directed by Scarlett Knight.

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by Cookie Cawthon

kay, I dont do well with endings. I dont prefer them. They generally make me sad. Im not a huge fan of beginnings either. They tend to be difficult. So the close of one year and the start of another isnt really my favorite time of year. 2009 may well have been one of the most eventful years of my life, and it sped by faster than any other for sure. Certainly the highlight was my trip to Kenya in November. I still cant stop talking about it, much to the dismay of those who have to listen to me on a regular basis (thank you for your patience, guys!). True to form, I had a difficult time during the first two days of the trip; beginnings are hard. I missed home. I missed my family. I missed the comforts of my life. I was sleep-deprived and missed my Diet Pepsi. I remember sitting at dinner on the second night, clenching my jaw - working diligently to dam tears. After eight hours of sleep and a hot Diet Coke with my breakfast the next morning, I loved every minute of the trip. Then. We came home, and though I was beyond grateful and excited to be home with my kiddos and my man, the end of that experience has made me quite sad. While in Kenya, one of our groups goals was to work alongside the people of the Segera area as they pursue solutions to their communitys needs: clean water, improved hygiene and personal care, and higher quality education. They determined the greatest needs, prioritized them, established a plan for addressing the problems, and then set out about the work. We brought manpower and resources, in Jesus name, to join them in their efforts. Theres a big fat reason we didnt go in with our own plan and agenda, and its called sustainable change. The long term goal is that the locals will own the process for change and will continue to move forward to better their quality of life. Even when teams and resources are no longer visiting the area. That principle so resonated with me. So, I came home and found myself caught between two worlds. What I had seen and felt and cherished about that place and those people didnt at all fit into my life here. My experience there was not a nice little puzzle piece that I picked up in Africa and fit cutely back in my life in America. I am still wrangling with how to be different. I feel differently. I see differently. Now how do I live differently? Cause my greatest fear is that over the course of time my eyes will forget what they have seen and my heart will forget what it feels and I will be unchanged in the end. Sustainable change. How does that happen? When the memories are no longer as fresh as they are right now. When I am back in the saddle and moving smoothly through the well-oiled routine again, how can I ensure that the change sticks? Many of you may be pondering the same question in a different context. Theres probably some change that you are claiming as your New Years resolution even if you

O

vowed not to tell anyone what it is. The hope and promise of a new year gets us all. In January 2007, I made a commitment to lose weight and seriously live a healthy lifestyle. Through the help of First Place, I lost twenty-five pounds, exercised on a regular and consistent basis, and took the best care of myself I ever have. I ran a half marathon in February of 2008 and wrote about that year of transformation in the March issue of SHE before I became a contributing writer. People who read that article continue to ask if I still run. The answer is a little greyer than it used to be. Cause I dont run as consistently or as often as I once did. I have kept most of the weight off, but I have gained some back, and I sure do like to dabble in some unhealthiness more than I should. Did sustainable change happen in my life? I think the verdict is still out on that one. I am different. I have changed, but I am now looking at the place where I do what it takes to move towards my goals again or I throw it all to the wind and rush headlong back to the place I have no desire to revisit. Sustainable change. How does that happen? It happens when we own the process for change and continue to move towards a better quality of life against all the odds. It happens when we educate ourselves and then act on our knowledge. It happens when we invite accountability and when we disallow excuses. It happens when we live day to day celebrating the good days without permitting the bad ones to sabotage the whole process. We acknowledge that this is hard, that it feels hopeless, that the journey makes us crabby and ill, and that we want to give up, and then we fight harder to be true to what is at work within us. It happens when we prioritize, make a plan, and set out about the work. It happens when we are strong. It happens when we choose what is best over what is good. So. Here goes. I invite your accountability on my two areas of change. If you see me out and about, you are free to ask me how I am living differently because of Africa (though you will then be obligated to listen to me ramble on endlessly) and you may ask if I am running on a consistent basis. You are not, however, free to ask how much I weigh because I may punch you [sweet smile with head tilt]. Sustainable change. Make it happen.

Cause my greatest fear is that over the course of time my eyes will forget what they have seen and my heart will forget what it feels and I will be unchanged in the end.

Cookie Cawthon shares much more than you care to read about her trip to Kenya and other randomness about her life on her blog at www.cookiecawthon.com.

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MONOGRAMMING BABY ITEMS GIFT ITEMS PURSES JEWELRY

Students dance and sing for residents and guests at Elmcroft Assisted Living bringing Christmas cheer

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Toni Adams, Owner/Director Instructors: Carl Askew, Brittany Jeffers, Mary Jones New classes in tap and/or ballet/jazz beginning January 5, 2010, for ages 3-5 and 6-8. Call now for registration information. We offer a limited number of students in each class. A few spaces are available in hip hop, tap and/or ballet/jazz for older students. Private classes available. Current openings in the Ladies adult tap class. We offer our spring performances at Francis Marion University and an annual recital. Regional and national competitions. Viewing window for parental observation during class. Accepting ages 3-Adult CLASSES: 2:30pm-8pm Mon.- Thu. 130 A N. Coit St. Florence, SC 8 4 3 - 6 1 7 - 9 6 0 7

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a time of

by Ferebe GasqueI said to the man who stood at the gate of the year 'Give me a light that I may tread safely into the unknown.' And he replied, 'Go into the darkness and put your hand into the hand of God That shall be to you better than light and safer than a known way!' first time in the Trauma Unit at MUSC, he died the final time. When my aunt (my dads maiden sister) was stricken with Alzheimers disease, my mother once again became those things for her sister-in-law. So, to take care of my mother was an honor for me. Having studied classes in grief and counseling both in college and seminary and being a Board Certified Music Therapist working at Hospice House, I thought I knew how my life would change. I could not have been more wrong. Grief is a strange animal. It runs its course at its pace in its own way with each circumstance. Sure, there are predictable stages. However, the order of the stages and the length of each stage are in a to-be-determined category. So, February 1, 2008, began my search for my new normal. Thankfully, my faith and trust in Gods control started long before that day. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that He had placed me at Hospice House in His time. I knew He had placed Christian friends and co-workers around me to support me and pray for me and cry with me. I knew He had me securely in the palm of His hand. But, it still wasnt easy. During the next eighteen months, I continued to struggle with Gods leadership and direction in my life. I knew He was there. I knew He had plans for me. I knew He was still in control. But, I was also reminded that when we are seeking Gods best in our lives, Satan is not a happy camper. So, there were days when my security was a little wobbly. I still knew deep down but, sometimes it was WAY deep down. This past summer, I felt Gods movement in my life. I didnt know where nor how He was leading. But, I knew something was going on. I loved my job. I had been a Service Coordinator for Florence County Disabilities and Special Needs Board for five years. Granted, I loved the hands-on advocacy and meeting the needs of those I served much more than I enjoyed the paperwork. But, I loved my job. Additionally, I knew that I needed the job and the benefits. After all, as a single woman, I had no other source of income than that which I brought to the table. However, in August, I felt Gods strong leadership to resign. I knew, again, that He knew best. And, He did. There was yet another period of grief in my life after leaving that position. And, I continue to miss the people I served so very much. As I stood at that crossroads, I admitted to God that I could no longer hold on. He would have to hold on to me. He has continued to do so. He has provided for me through my continued work at McLeod Hospice House, through my Pampered Chef business, and through little surprises every now and then that only He could have orchestrated. So, as I begin this new year with my hand securely in His hands, I know that He will never let go. He never promised it would be easy. But, He did promise that He would be there always, no matter what.

I

first heard this quote many years ago from the pulpit of First Baptist Church, Florence, as Dr. Edward L. Byrd preached his New Years sermon. I dont remember much else about the sermon today; but that quote has stayed with me through the years. In fact, I once saw it in a church bulletin in some other city, cut it out, and taped it to the inside cover of my Bible. I learned later that it was from a then-obscure poem, written in 1908, quoted by King George VI in his Christmas speech in 1939. It is just as true today as it was on the brink of World War II. January is traditionally a time of new beginnings. While January 1 is just another day, sometimes we need that extra push to begin again. This issue of She Magazine is on lifestyle changes. Some of those changes are by choice. Losing weight, stopping smoking, changing less-than-desirable habits, starting new projects, and other similar resolutions are typically by choice. There are other lifestyle changes, however, that are unplanned and often unwelcomed. How we act and react during those changes (whether or not by choice) speaks volumes to those around us. But, Ive learned that my actions and reactions speak most loudly to me. As many of you know, these last two years have been a time of transition in my life. For more than four years before my mother went to Heaven, I spent every night at her house, taking care of her needs. For me, it was a labor of love. But, trust me, there were times when it was also a labor of commitment. I will be the first to admit that I am human and I get tired. But, I will also tell you that I watched my mother take care of others without complaint. When my dads mother broke her hip, my mother stayed with her every weekday for seven years so my aunt (who lived with her) could go to work. In 1973, Momma and Daddy were in a near-fatal automobile accident which left Daddy in Medical University for months and then at home in a body cast for a year. In 1978, he developed ALS (Lou Gehrig disease). Though it is well known now, ALS was rare at that time. She never left his side. She was his nurse, his chauffeur, his banker, his maid, and his source of strength. Seven years after dying the

Ferebe Gasque is looking forward to the new adventures of this new year in her continued search for her "new normal" -- whatever that may be.

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She Magazine January 2010 33

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shop talk

Pictured Top: (left to right) Bottom row: Alexus Lee, Alison Jordan, Kay Collins, Sandra Feagin Second row: Dr. Dipali Patel (Intern),Teresa Evans,Wanda Coates, Ashton Lowman Top row: Alfred Mitchell, Dr. Stephen Tuel, Dr. Joseph Carter

Eastern Carolina Medicinewith Dr. Joseph Carterfrom The University of South Carolina School of Medicine in 1987. He became a Diplomat of the National Board of Medical Examiners in 1988 and Board Certified in Anesthesiology in 1992. Dr. Dipali Patel (Intern) has been an Intern under Dr. Carter since October and recently completed her residency Dr. Stephen Tuel, Dr. Joseph Carter, Dr. Dipali Patel (Intern) in Chiropractic Medicine at Logan College of St. Louis. She also studied under Dr. Carter at ABOUT US: Eastern Carolina Medicine serves the National University of Health Sciences for Acupuncture. Greater Florence and Pee Dee region with a variety of Alfred Mitchell works directly with our patients concennon-invasive treatments and procedures based on long- trating on Myofascial Release and Increased Range of Motion. standing principles of Alternative Medicine Acupuncture Teresa has worked with Dr. Carter for 16 years as and Chiropractic Treatment. Pain Management is our spe- Administrative Assistant. As Senior Ranking Associate, she cialty. Eastern Carolina Medicine was established in 2002. handles all day-to-day office functions. Sandra is the Receptionist for Dr. Carter. She schedules OUR STAFF: Our Doctors and Office Staff are here to appointments for Chiropractic and Acupuncture, as well as make your visit a pleasant experience. all referrals for Dr. Carters patients. Dr. Carter attended East Tennessee State University and Alexus has a myriad of responsibilities in our office. She Logan Chiropractic College in St. Louis, Missouri. He holds handles all aspects of patient billing, electronic claim filing, a Bachelor of Science Degree in Science and Human personal injury cases and workers compensation claims. In Anatomy. He received his Doctorate of Chiropractic addition to those duties, Alexus is our LPN, Nerve Degree from Logan College in 1979. He also holds a Conduction Technician and is CPR Certified. Certificate in Impairment Rating from National College in Alison is our newest addition to the insurance department, Chicago and Logan College in St. Louis. He has served working as our Patient Account Representative. She is three times as Vice President of the South Carolina responsible for electronic claim filing, patient billing and perChiropractic Association. Dr. Carter is the first chiroprac- sonal injury cases. She has been cross-trained in front desk tor in South Carolina to be given permission to practice duties, as well as assisting Dr. Carter when needed. Acupuncture by the South Carolina Board of Medical Ashton is the Receptionist for Dr.Tuel and Dr. Honaker. She Examiners. He is on the Post-Graduate Faculty of Logan schedules appointments, handles referrals and works directCollege and the National University of Health Science in ly with the patients. Chicago. Dr. Carter has been in practice for 30 years. Wanda and Kay are the Chiropractic Assistants that work Dr. Stephen Tuel joined the practice in 2006 and added directly with Dr. Carter. Wanda also assists with physical Physiatric Care for our patients. Dr.Tuel graduated from the therapy patients and proudly represents our office at local University of Texas in 1980 with a Masters Degree in job fairs. Biomedical Engineering and in 1983 with an M.D. Dr. Tuel treats pain and disability from neuromuscular trauma, includ- WHAT WE OFFER: With three doctors and a trained ing injuries to the head, neck and back. He specializes in the support staff of Nurses, Clinicians and Administrative diagnosis and treatment of trigger points, which are very Personnel, we can provide the best possible alternative care painful spots in the muscles, and musculo-ligamentous strain in the region. in the neck and back. In his experience, most pain in the Acupuncture is an ancient, non-medical technique used to head, neck and back can be treated successfully without sur- treat and relieve chronic pain. It is the oldest natural-healing gery or narcotic drugs. method known to man. For more than 2000 years,Asian cul Dr. Patrick Honaker joined the practice in 2007 and added tures have depended upon the skilled application of Anesthesiology Care for our patients. Dr. Honaker graduat- Acupuncture as treatment and a preventative for a variety of ed from the University of South Carolina in 1983 with a conditions, as well as a means of enhancing recuperative Bachelors of Science in Biology, and he received his M.D. power and immunity. The Clinical Experience: Thin, solid, sterile stainless steel acupuncture needles are inserted into acupuncture points. Insertion of the needles goes unnoticed by some patients, while others feel a small pinch followed by a sensation of tingling, numbness, ache, traveling warmth or heaviness. Needles remain in place for 15 to 40 minutes, during which time most patients experience a sense of profound relaxation. Acupuncture is most commonly known for its benefits as they apply to the following musculoskeletal and neurological conditions:

Arthritis (rheumatoid, degenerative and osteoarthritis) Neuralgia Infertility Back Pain

Neurogenic Pain Bells Palsy Sciatica Bursitis Spinal Stenosis Carpal Tunnel Syndrome Stiff

Neck Fibromyalgia Shingles Headache Tendonitis Herniated Disc Trigeminal

Patients typically feel some relief from their symptoms two to four weeks after treatment begins. Cervical and Lumbar Epidural Injections: To help relieve pain, medication is injected into the epidural space. This space surrounds the dura within the spinal canal. During this procedure, medication is injected near a specific nerve root (the part of the nerve that leaves the spinal canal). A nerve block can help your doctor find out which nerve or nerves are the source of your pain. Trigger Point Injection: A trigger point is a tight, painful knot of muscle fiber. It can form where a muscle is strained or injured. The knot can sometimes be felt under the skin. A trigger point is very tender to the touch. Pain may also spread to other parts of the affected muscle. Muscles around a knee, shoulder blade or other bones are prone to trigger points. This is because these muscles are more likely to be injured. Electromyography (EMG) and Nerve Conductions Studies (NCS): These are tests that measure muscle and nerve function. During a NCS, mild electrical currents are applied to the skin on some parts of your body. This is done to see how quickly impulses travel between nerves. An EMG assesses muscle function. A fine needle is placed under your skin into the muscle being tested. No electrical currents are applied with the needle. FIND US: Eastern Carolina Medicine is located at 3124 South Cashua Drive in Florence. We can be reached by telephone at 843-665-2600 or 843-665-7500. Call today for an appointment, and see how we can improve your quality of life.

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She Magazine January 2010 35

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In what area of your life do you need the most growth, and what will you do about it in the New Year?1Walt Peterson - HartsvilleI need more growth and knowledge concerning todays technology like Twitter and Facebook in marketing insurance products. My son and daughter should be able to help me with this unless they get frustrated trying to teach an old dog new tricks. I certainly need a tune-up using our computers in the office. I plan on attending seminars, webinars and asking my wife for help.

2

Tommy Benton - ManningAt this stage in my life, I need to slow down and not work as many hours. I want to spend my time with my grandchildren and my family.

3

Don Walter - FlorenceThe Lord has blessed me with so much throughout my life. I have a wonderful family and great friends. While there are many areas in my life that need growth, perhaps the most pressing is giving back to the community that has been so special to me and my family over the past 25 years. So often, busyness prevents us from using our time in the most effective ways. So, in 2010, Ill be looking for ways to prioritize my time and find ways where I can honor God and serve others through giving back. As a new Rotarian, Ive already seen some excellent ways where they are doing just that.

4

Arden Gatchell - FlorenceIn my opinion, the area of my life which needs the most growth is in the spiritual arena. With extended family, a newly opened business, children, service organizations and the economic conditions we now live in, its hard to focus on the true reason were here on earth. You can go to church, temple or mosque, but each of us must strive to have a personal relationship with what we deem to be our higher power prior to anything else materializing spiritually in our lives. Sometimes, this gets lost in the hustle and bustle of our daily lives at least it has in mine. This year, I plan to get back to the basics read the Bible, enjoy nature at every opportunity and improve my relationships with family and friends. I plan to ask if what Im doing is in the plan He has for me and try my best to listen and be aware of potential answers that may come my way.

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12/21/09

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Its About

TIME!What Is the BIGGEST TIME-WASTER in Your Life, And What Will You do About It This Year?

by Latrelle P. Fowler, RN, PhD, Life Coachthe clutter left from Christmas family time and stack the boxes, I notice the camera with all the pictures just waiting to be printed. This leads me to burn a CD, send the pictures to a website for printing and all sorts of other thoughts. Then, I notice that my desk is cluttered with old mail and bills needing attention. Before I know it, my day is gone and the clutter still remains, some pictures are printed and some bills are paid. Do I have an attention disorder? I privately wonder. What is my biggest time waster and what can I do about it? In my role as a Teacher, Mentor and Life Coach, I see distraction or lack of ability to focus as the number-one killer of quality time. While procrastination, perfectionism and overload haunt many women who perform multiple roles, some individuals just do not know where to start to prioritize their tasks within a limited timeframe. Lets meet Judy (a hypothetical person) who works full-time in retail, serves as the single mother of a two-year old and is starting college part-time. With the added responsibilities of studying, on top of her already-full schedule, she quickly realizes that she is overloaded. How can she manage her time to effectively achieve her number-one goal becoming a nurse so she can earn more money and do what she has always dreamed? She has to put first things first. What is the most important goal, right now, in her life? For example, juggling motherhood, work and college seems impossible. Each hour of each day counts and our example mom will get no extra time in her schedule just because she adds college courses. Where can she find time to study? I suggest she write down two columns. One column will include the goals she must do for the month. In the next column, beside each goal, she will list each available resource needed to accomplish the goal. While she pictures all she has to do, she may discover she has family or friends who will help her with childcare, grocery shopping, etc., during study time. Next, she should number each goal/task in priority order. This will lead to the next step realigning daily routines that fit her prioritized schedule, like having a routine at home with her child between 6 and 8 PM. And, a specific bedtime can help her feel good about her actual number-one priority motherhood before moving to the next priority of making a B in the courses. Perhaps, she then lists all the other goals/duties that she must meet in the next six months with another list beside it of resources to achieve these goals. If this

AS I PICK UP

seems impossible, then she might ask for help with finances, work less, take less than a full-time college course load or move in with a supportive friend to share expenses. Nothing is impossible when one believes in Gods sovereign will to provide the way to reach ones higher call. The daily struggle many of us have is to focus on the number-one priority. The important thing is not always the seemingly urgent matter at hand. Discerning what is important and taking care of urgent fires that we keep getting thrown our way is the art of motherhood, womanhood and especially career building. Successful leaders have repeatedly shown that putting out everyones urgent fires cloud the prime vision, and thus they quickly move into the not-so-urgent but important list of goals for the organization. Stephen Covey and others find effective leaders operate more with planning and doing the important tasks and shy away from urgent/unimportant tasks. How do I get the Christmas mess cleaned up and get important goals like my Bible study met? Sometimes, I literally set a time-limit to do the de-cluttering and then reward myself with a cup of coffee as I transition to focusing on what I really need to do. Other times, I have to choose to ignore the unimportant, obvious problems and focus solely on getting the hardest task of the day done first. I can save email, Facebook and bills to pay until I have given my mental energy to the articles I have to read or write. Urgent may be redefined when you prioritize the important things in your life. Having a regular time to do the messy jobs and hardest jobs can prove helpful. When the focus of life seems entirely confusing, an outside party like a counselor or life coach can help. We define our values daily by how we spend our time and money, but to decide ahead of time how to live life with purpose takes regular focused energy. Try answering these questions: How do you want to feel at the end of this month? How do you think your friends/family see you spending time? How do you want to be remembered when you are no longer in their lives? If all you see yourself doing is putting out fires for others, when will you refill your cup? In other words, what is your purpose and highest calling? Its never too late to redefine the focus of your life, yet some may wait until crisis of life and death calls. Its never too late to refocus on our main purpose. What is yours today?

Latrell