Session 4 healthy authority unlocked

Healthy Authority

Unlocked

Briefly discuss your

‘authority’ experiences (good

or bad) and try to see what

impact they have had on your view of authority figures

Being hurt by authority figures can

result in inner vows being made:

• ‘I wont come under authority again’

• ‘I wont be controlled by authority again’

• ‘I wont trust authority again’

These vows may give the

feeling of protection but in

essence they cut you off

from the blessing that

honouring authority brings

He who gives honor to a prophet,

in the name of a prophet, will be

given a prophet's reward; and he

who gives honor to an upright

man, in the name of an upright

man, will be given an upright

man's reward.

Matthew 10 v 41

Children, obey your parents in the

Lord, for this is right. “Honor your

father and mother” - which is the

first commandment with a

promise - “so that it may go well

with you and that you may enjoy

long life on the earth.”

Ephesians 6 v 1-3

Fathers, do not exasperate your

children; instead, bring them up in the

training and instruction of the Lord.

Ephesians 6 v 4

Key phrase for the unhealthy authority

figure:

‘I have to be in control’

Key phrase for the healthy authority figure:

‘I have been put in charge’

UNHEALTHY

AUTHORITY

HEALTHY

AUTHORITY

1. Controls through fear

and manipulation

1. Creates a culture of

order and empowerment

2. Provides no safety or

protection

2. Provides safety and

protection

3. Discourages and

shames

3. Encourages, forgives

and strengthens

4. Refuses to pass on

skills or information

4. Informs and equips

5. Order comes through

external control, not

self-control


honour, trust and

self-control

UNHEALTHY

AUTHORITY

HEALTHY

AUTHORITY

1. Controls through fear

and manipulation

1. Creates a culture of

empowerment

and order

• Punishments given for

disobedience or mistakes

• Made to feel responsible

for the authority figure’s

results or feelings

• Trust is established

• Unconditional

acceptance provided

• Thoughtful correction

given when needed

UNHEALTHY

AUTHORITY

HEALTHY

AUTHORITY

2. Provides no safety

or protection

2. Provides safety

and protection

• Fear of abandonment

• Fear of punishment

• Unpredictable responses

• Don’t feel valued

• No fear of abandonment

• No fear of punishment

• Secure in expected

responses

• Feel valued

UNHEALTHY

AUTHORITY

HEALTHY

AUTHORITY

3. Discourages

and shames

3. Encourages, forgives

and strengthens

• Uses insulting language

• Shares ‘failings’ with

others

• People end up lying or

hiding to cover up

mistakes

• Brings consistent

affirmation

• Quick to forgive

• Wont bring out the ‘list of

failures’

• People able to be honest

about mistakes

UNHEALTHY

AUTHORITY

HEALTHY

AUTHORITY

4. Refuses to pass on

skills or information

4. Informs and equips

• Is insecure

• Wants to stay ‘top dog’

• Secure in themselves

• Delighted when

subordinates ‘go further’

UNHEALTHY

AUTHORITY

HEALTHY

AUTHORITY


external control, not

self-control


honour, trust and

self-control

• Compliance under the

‘watchful eye’

• Rebellious and unhealthy

‘independent attitude’

• Refuse to listen or be

taught

• No sense of

corporate/family

responsibility

• Even in disagreement

there is honour

• Self management is

learned practised

• Happy to ask and be

taught

• Values corporate/family

responsibility

ABDICATION OF AUTHORITY

Thinks freedom means ‘no boundaries’

and therefore doesn’t provide safe or

secure environment

Doesn’t bring correction in a consistent manner

Peace and order come through the

‘path of least resistance’

Has a higher value for ‘peace and harmony’ than

healthy confrontation or discussion of issues

‘Mis-use’ should not result in ‘no

use’ but in exercising ‘proper use’

in other words…

Experiencing unhealthy authority

should not result in the abdication

of authority but in the exercise of

healthy authority

Questions to ask:

1. What is my authority style?

Healthy, unhealthy, abdicating or a mix?

2. What are the specific strengths I have in my

authority role?

e.g. I am a good mentor, I am a great encourager, I

always deal with things head on, etc…

3. How can I build on these strengths?

Think of at least 5 things that you could do

4. What are my weaknesses as an authority figure?

Do I try to control too much, am I too harsh with my

tongue, am I afraid to give people a voice, do I avoid

confrontation, am I unclear in my requests from

people…?

5. What can I do to address these weaknesses?

Think of at least 5 things you can do

6. What would it feel like to be in subordinate’s

shoes? ( or team/family member/etc.)

Your view of God will

ultimately affect what kind of

authority figure you become

When we look at Jesus we see

‘God with skin on’

• For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in

bodily form Col 2 v 9

• The Son is the image of the invisible God, the

firstborn over all creation Col 1 v 15

• The Son is the radiance of God's glory and the

exact representation of his being Heb 1 v 3

Jesus – the best authority figure!

• He established trust Dining with Matthew the Tax Collector (Matthew 9)

Rescuing Peter whilst walking on the water (Matthew 14)

Demonstrated he was ‘a safe place’

• He empowered Equipping, instructing, warning, reassuring (Matthew 10)

• He modelled love and forgiveness Example of restoring Peter after his denial (John 21)

• He was a ‘Legacy Thinker’ He poured out his life into his disciples and his prayer in

John 17 exemplifies his heart for them and ultimately for us

‘I have made you known to them, and will continue

to make you known in order that the love you

have for me may be in them and that I myself

may be in them.” John 17 v 26

That same love that the father had for Jesus is

imparted into us, as we get a revelation of ‘knowing

the father’

Question: How can I love like Jesus loved?

Answer: ‘Know the Father’

Question: But how can I know the Father?

Answer: ‘Jesus makes him known to you’