theScribe September 28 to October 4, 2010 [Volume 35; Issue 5] Inside this issue... featured Clyde’s page 8 Students march in support of the men’s and women’s soccer teams (page 12) Being iced pushes students to be creative about drinking (page 9) Hole in (Division) one Page 11
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theScribeSeptember 28 to October 4, 2010 [Volume 35; Issue 5]
Inside this issue... featured
Clyde’s page 8
Students march in support of the men’s and women’s soccer teams (page 12)
Being iced pushes students to be creative about drinking (page 9)
Hole in (Division) one
Page 11
When I was very young, I was determined not to learn to read, be-cause my parents read to me nightly, and I had no reason to ever learn to do it myself. My dad read me books by Dr. Seuss, from “One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish” to “And to Think that I Saw it on Mulberry Street.” I recall the Lorax and Sam I Am and Yertle the Turtle like childhood friends, and the words to “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch” are per-manently ingrained in my brain. (My dad still sings it each holiday season, and I can’t help but chime in.) Mom and I journeyed through Narnia together, and each time I revisit it now, I remember with great fondness those nights curled up with her, reading about Aslan and Reepicheep and the Dawn Treader. Later, Dad intro-duced me to Harry Pot-ter, and my folks and I read each of the seven together; though when I hit college, it took us months to plow through the hundreds of pages, because finding time to visit Hogwarts together became more difficult. Despite my previ-ous unwillingness and thanks to my parents’ heartfelt love of litera-ture, I did learn to read, and I began to do so vo-raciously from a very young age. The first chapter book I ever read by myself was “The Cow-Tail Switch: And Other West African Stories,” by Harold Courlander and George Herzog. I remember the feeling of triumph that surged through me when I turned the last page and realized I had just read a book all by myself; I
think it might be like nothing I’ve ever felt since. My parents never restricted my reading. They never once, in all our lives, told me that I wasn’t allowed to read something. There were times, such as my brief prepubescent foray into the works of Kurt Von-negut, when they sug-gested that I wait a few years in order to better grasp the material; but even then, I was not banned from reading those texts. I just didn’t understand “Cat’s Cra-dle” for a couple of years after I finished it. No…maybe I still don’t understand “Cat’s Cradle.” I can only remember one instance of my par-ents placing an age pre-requisite on a book, and that was none other than my father’s favorite, “A Confederacy of Dunc-es,” by John Kennedy Toole. Mom, appalled at the content, laid down one of her rare decrees: that I was not permit-ted to read “A Confed-eracy of Dunces” until I turned 16. Shortly after that birthday passed, I picked up that book, and set it down again not 50 pages later. I’d never encountered a book like it, that addressed such content blatantly, and I hadn’t been prepared. I still haven’t read that book, because I remem-ber my teenage shock; but one of these days I’ll get around to it, and be able to enjoy yet an-other literary frontier with my father. My parents did right by me, and I’ll never be able to thank them enough for that. They encouraged me to read, to read everything, to enjoy the art of story and to embrace litera-ture and life. Through reading, I learned about the good and evil of the world, who I was, what it means to be human and about some parts of the world so dark that I never would have guessed at them other-wise. And that’s what lit-erature is supposed to do. It’s a window, a gateway, a tattoo, a les-son and a web that con-nects each of us to the
others. The stories we are taught as children help us to remember our roots, guide our lives and decide how we will live each day. That’s why book banning has never made sense to me. I under-stand that to censure is a violation of our First Amendment rights, and that to regulate the flow of information on a ba-sis of arbitrarily-deter-mined restrictions is an abhorrent crime against progress and memory, but mostly, the reason I cringe at censorship is the abridgement and PC revision of story. My grandfather and I once had an argument about the “His Dark Ma-terials” trilogy by Philip Pullman, the first book of which, “The Golden Compass,” was made into a movie a couple of years ago. He suggested that the books, as a sort of secular response to C.S. Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia, be disal-lowed from Christian households and the eyes of younger readers in general. I replied that I had really enjoyed those books as a young teen, and other kids shouldn’t be denied the power and beauty of those stories just because they de-parted from their own personally held ideolo-gies. Grandaddy had some really good points, and I’m still not sure which of us is right. All I know is that I view the institutional regulation of available literature with a slanted eye and a skeptical heart, because stories are a large part of what made me who I am today. It is up to families to determine the sto-ries that enter the minds of their children, not schools or communi-ties or states at large. I celebrate Banned Book Week proudly, because my home was an open forum of discussion and learning and growth and the appreciation of lit-erature of all types, and because there can never be enough stories. Thank you, Mom and Dad, for making me who I am today, and for teaching me to read. Happy Banned Books Week.
editorial Page 2
The official sTudenT newspaper of The universiTy of colorado
aT colorado springs
the scribe
Editor-in-ChiEf.............................AvAlon MAnly
MAnAging Editor.............................JEssiCA lynCh
BusinEss MAnAgEr.....................roBErt rodriguEz
AdvErtising/sAlEs MAnAgEr..............luis hidAlgo
nEws Editor..............................CAthErinE JEnsEn
CulturE Editor..............................BroCk kilgorE
AthlEtiCs Editor...........................MAtt CrAndAll
opinion/sCriBBlE Editor...................JAsEn CoopEr
photogrAhy Editor......................AriEl lAttiMorE
Copy Editor..................................ChErisE fAntus
wEB dEsignEr................................doriAn rogErs
lAyout dEsignErs...............................J.d. osorio
.........................................................shrEyA rAJ
rEportErs.........................................roB vErsAw
......................................................AlEx CrAMEr
photogrAphErs.........................CArriE woodruff
................................................ChElsEA BArtlEtt
..................................................MiChEllE wood
Junior rEportErs..............................J.p. niEhAus
...................................................grEg williAMs
.................................................Elliot rEynolds
.....................................................ivory wAlkEr
......................................................AMAndA putz
.....................................................kristin gArst
ContriButors...............................stEvEn fArrEll
....................................................AndrEw roAkE
CArtoonist.................................................Arno
distriButor................................donAld truJillo
Advisor..........................................lAurA EuriCh
-----------CovEr photo By MiChEllE wood------------
September 28 to October 4
A shameless letter of appreciation
Editor-in-ChiefAvalon Manly
The ScribeUC 106
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inforMAtion
Letters to the EditorThe Scribe strongly encourages letters to the editor. Letters intended for pub-lication must not exceed 350 words, must be legible and include the writer’s name and contact information. Letters must be submitted to The Scribe via email at [email protected] by 5:00 p.m. on Thursdays before publication. The Scribe reserves the right to reject letters to the editor that are libelous, obscene or anonymous and has the right to edit as necessary due to space limitations, spelling or other grammatical errors and AP style guidelines.
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student lifePage 3September 28 to October 4
Fill out the sudoku puzzle below so that each row and column contain the numbers 1 through 9 with none repeated. Return it and the adjacent crossword to the Scribe office when finished; if you’re the first one done (and they’re done right), you’ll be en-tered into a drawing for two free tickets to the Haunted Mines.
the failboat
all aboard
FTW
Bear eating your dog? Just throw some vegetables at it.
On Wednesday Sept. 15, a Montana woman bypassed her shot-gun for a homegrown vegetable when a 200-pound black bear at-tacked her dog just after midnight on the back porch of her home in Frenchtown. The woman, whose name has not been disclosed, screamed to distract the bear from her 12-year-old collie. The bear charged, making a swipe at her leg. As she clamored back inside her house, she grabbed a 12-inch zucchini sitting on her kitchen coun-ter and hurled it at the bear. With precision only acquired from life in the country, the woman nailed the bear on top of the head, caus-ing it to run from the premises, explained the Associated Press.
Love and marriage...three times over. It’s enough to make Al Bundy implode.
“I just fell in love. Then I fell in love again, and I fell in love again,” Kody Brown explained in the opening episode of “Sister Wives,” TLC’s latest re-ality series about an excessively large family. This one is set in Utah (sur-prise!). And with a polygamist twist, a man with three wives, claiming to have fallen in love three times is sure to lift more than just a viewer’s right eyebrow. “I never wanted to just be married to a man,” says Christine, who is pregnant with Kody’s 13th child. She’s glad to be his third wife and en-joys having sister wives. The show asks viewers to “rethink marriage,” and reminds us to steer clear of men looking to date us and our little sisters.
“Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what if I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn’t seem quite so funny”
- Jack Handey
“A person with a new idea is a crank until the
idea succeeds.”Friday, Oct. 1, at 2 p.m., Mark Twain himself will host a discus-sion of invention and innovation in the Kraemer Family Library. Twain (played by Alan Kitty) will be here in solidarity with the play about his contemporary, Nikola Tesla, which appears on the The-atreworks stage for the last time
this weekend.
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Puzzle 1 (Very hard, difficulty rating 0.80)
Generated by http://www.opensky.ca/~jdhildeb/software/sudokugen/ on Mon Sep 27 02:58:49 2010 GMT. Enjoy!
It’s annoying when people do this in real life and online, as this one doesn’t hurt. “We had one class together freshman year, let’s be friends” This let’s the entire world know how much your life sucks and what color your tooth-brush is __ you’re it and now everyone knows about what you did in the hot tub that one time.I have more of these from Facebook than I do from anyone else. The pop-up box of doom. It will keep you online for hours.
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ACROSS 2 Today my rabbit was hit by a car and so I failed the chem quiz and my heart hurts.
4 You hit this button when you are not so jazzed about something. At all.
6 Would you like to cancel this? 7 This is what you do to your significant other once you've broken up and they've begun to stalk you.
9 Because you have nothing better to do than plant virtual vegetables and watch them die.
DOWN 1 A place to make friends without having
to get to know or keep them. 3 The button you hit when you are really
jazzed about something. 5 You have 324.5 of these. 8
The area where your bf or gf posts how much they love you and your mom reminds you to do your laundry
10 This changes every time you get a new outfit
11 You write one of these when you have something you can't say on someone's wall without shaming them.Laughing Out Loud has never been so simple
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newsPage 4 September 28 to October 4
On Sept. 14, the Univer-sity Center Ballroom was renamed Berger Hall in honor of James C. Berger. Berger, a 1956 CU-Boul-der graduate, put great time and effort into this recent project. Recently remodeled, Berger Hall will be used for confer-ences and other meetings. Chancellor Shockley-Zalabak explained, “It is fitting that this space, which is so critical to the mission of our campus, be named in recognition of Jim Berger.” Since Berger’s gradua-tion, he has been involved with the UCCS campus and the student communi-ty at large. The vice presi-dent of the CU foundation,
Brian Winkelbauer, said, “Jim’s involvement with the university - through his vision, counsel and personal generosity over the span of many years - helped form the solid foundation that has en-hanced the ability of this campus to progress at an impressive pace.” Without Berger’s help, the campus would not have been able to succeed as much as it has in previous years. With the support of the UCCS faculty and Berger’s pertinent in-volvement, the gym has been appropriately named. Winkelbauer stated, “Jim is tremendous, he is all about character, integrity and honesty; he is always up front with people and
that’s what makes him such a good businessman. He also loves the Univer-sity of Colorado.” On top of his numerous contribu-tions to UCCS, he has also worked on several aca-demic boards for UCCS administration. He served on the CU Real Estate Foundation Board from October 2002 to Septem-ber 2009, and is now a part of an advisory board at UCCS known as the Chancellor’s Round Table. Winkelbauer added, “He is a wonderful advocate and offers amazing advice for the University”. Berger’s contributions also include plans for a scholarship fund for low-income, high-potential students.
University Center Ballroom takes new nameKristin [email protected]
If only everything about college were this easy.
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Formal and Casino Night will be held on Oct. 2 from 8:30 p.m. to 2 a.m. Tradi-tionally held in the upper plaza, this year’s night will take place in Berger Hall (formerly known as the Ballroom, known before that as the Old Gym and originally known as the Lion’s Den). Student and alumni tickets can be pur-chased for $10 and non-students for $20 at the UC front desk or at the door. OSA Advertising and Marketing Coordinator Nic Hostetter said that the location change has OSA members expecting more people than usual because they won’t have to worry as much about the weather. “In previous years it has been absolutely freezing
so we are looking forward to it being inside. We also have an actual ballroom area we can use now,” he said. Last year between 350 and 400 people attended, ac-cording to Hostetter. He adds that the majority of students who attend are upperclassmen and com-muter students. In an at-tempt to get more fresh-men involved, OSA made sure to place more adver-tising in campus housing and build “stronger con-nections with the RAs,” he said. Casino Night will oc-cur in conjunction with the formal in a different area of the UC. Games will include poker, roulette, Texas Hold ‘em, blackjack and craps. Deuces Wild, a casino company in town, will be bringing several professional dealers; the
rest will be student vol-unteers. The night will in-clude free food and drinks and lots of prizes, said Hostetter. Student Nancy Hoist, who has attended formal twice during her time at UCCS, said, “I’ve always enjoyed going. I think it’s one of the better events OSA puts on.” She is ex-cited that it will be inside and looking forward to taking her girlfriend. “I think it’s an opportunity for people who didn’t get to attend their high school prom to go to a nice dance. It’s nice because this is less formal and goes until two in the morning.” The event requires a lot of volunteers said Hostetter. Student clubs or indi-viduals who wish to help should contact Michelle Wood or Rob Burton in OSA.
Formal to be held indoorsCatherine [email protected]
Group projects are dif-ficult for a number of reasons. For the major-ity of students, finding a time and a place to meet is nearly impossible. Fortunately, there is a reprieve for those strug-gling to shoehorn time in their busy schedules: the internet. There is a lot of tech-nology for students to utilize on the internet to communicate with their groups: Adobe Con-nect, Blackboard, blogs, email, Facebook, Google Docs, instant messaging, Skype and wikis. Several professors are encouraging the use of technology for group work outside of the classroom. Janice Thor-pe, an instructor in the communication depart-ment, encourages her students to use the re-sources available to them to overcome physical limitations. In one of her courses, COMM 3240, Business and Profes-sional Communication, she utilizes Adobe Con-nect online conferencing software for class meet-
ings. Her students also use the Adobe Connect file sharing utility to cre-ate documents together in smaller groups, all in a virtual environment, she said. Dr. Winograd is also encouraging the use of technology in her courses. This year, she is using Blackboard. She hopes to utilize it in a way that helps stu-dent groups learn how to collaborate virtually, quite literally becoming “virtual teams.” With Blackboard she is able to set up a group feature, allowing members in a project team to commu-nicate and share docu-ments. “As a former user of eCompanion for my courses, I find Black-board as an improvement, even though I haven’t yet explored how to le-verage all its capacity or features,” she said. Thorpe finds that most students like Blackboard, most notably the ability to view their grades in “real-time” online. “It’s been time consuming to create a [Blackboard] for each of my courses, but I think it will save me time in the long run
because it forces me to be more organized and helps to keep everything in a central location.” Skype can also be used to do more than talk to your grandmother across the country or your friends back in your hometown. Dr. Winograd has utilized Skype to talk to graduate students. She and the stu-dents conducted weekly meetings via Skype, and used it to simultaneously edit documents. Thorpe also hopes to use Skype to talk with students who are unable to come in during her office hours and will be able to utilize it for guest speakers. While there is a definite need for face time for student projects, there is no denying the benefits of online interactivity. Thorpe says one of the foundations for her new course COMM 3400 (Digital Communication Technologies), is “like it or not, this is the world we live in, so we need to be exposed to these tools and have a better under-standing of their power and limitations.” Tech-nology will continue to be an integral aspect of group communication.
Let’s get together...onlineCorey [email protected]
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In Memoriam: Jerrod Elsemore
Jerrod Elsemore, 19, died last week on Sept. 15. Elsemore was reported missing by family members late the night of the 15th; his car was discovered the next day, abandoned on Lower Gold Camp Road. Searchers from the Colorado Springs Police and Fire Departments and El Paso County Search and Rescue found Elsemore’s body in the woods just south of the place where his vehicle was left.
Elsemore was a freshman at UCCS and a student of the Chemistry program. Funerary services were held last week, and his family asks that, in lieu of flowers, donations be made to El Paso County Search and Res-cue. University counseling services are available for stu-dents, staff and faculty struck by Elsemore’s passing. The Counseling Center can be reached at 255-3265.
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newsPage 5September 28 to October 4
Dr. John Brock knows supply and demand. In the recent spiraling economy, it has come to his attention that there is a huge demand for knowledge but little supply. Dr. Brock, an international educator in economics, is doing something about it. Brock holds a doctor-ate in economics from Cornell University and has published articles and a handbook on us-ing experimental eco-nomics in the classroom. In addition to teaching economics at the United States Air Force Acad-emy and then UCCS, he is the Director of the Center for Economic Education the “national nonprofit that assists kindergarten through 12th grade teachers with
understanding econom-ics,” he said. Brock’s father was a Naval Aviator and he said that he too want-ed to be a pilot, until he found economics. “When I was a little boy I wanted to be an Air Force Pilot… I was of-fered to do flight train-ing but I didn’t enjoy it, and my major was eco-nomics.” His attitude toward his students and his sub-ject can be found in the statement on each of his syllabi: “Economics is not a body of knowledge but a way of thinking.” He spoke adamantly about the importance of economics and wants students to remember that the classes he and the other professors have created “…don’t just bore students with statistics and theory. Often times we will
set up fake markets for students to trade and practice with; they get excited running around and earning fake mon-ey.” The lessons learned in these classes will be very practical in the real world for most majors, he said. In addition to hav-ing a passion for econ., Dr. Brock has a love for travel and family. His wife was a high school teacher for 22 years; he has a son who is a base-ball coach most recently at Georgetown Universi-ty and a daughter who is a family Medicine Doc-tor in Seattle. Brock is well travelled and has been to Africa, Egypt, Jordan, Indone-sia, Russia, the Czech Republic and many other places in order to teach teachers how to help their students learn economics.
Catherine [email protected]
Faculty Spotlight: Dr. John Brock
Last week, Penn-sylvania’s Harrisburg University of Science and Technology banned social networking sites on its campus. Provost Eric Darr authorized the week-long ban of Face-book, Twitter and online messaging as part of an “academic exercise” to see how students would cope without the constant updates, statuses and im-mediate electronic com-munication. Darr decided to initiate the ban after watching his 16-year-old daughter juggle multiple social networking sites on a daily basis. Darr explained in an NPR transcript, “If some-one feels the need to bor-row their friend’s phone to go check Facebook, it’ll be interesting to ask the question at the end of the week: Why did you
feel the need to do that? What compelled you to do that? We’re not try-ing to stop all access to these sites. We’re trying to at least put in a hurdle and make it enough for people to think about it.” Many students found the ban a relief, as Har-risburg’s Ashley Harris explained, “I’m going to commit, and I’m going to see what it’s like for a week if I talk to people face to face more - if I connect more. I might get some homework done.” As the week progressed, Harris felt liberated by the blackout, able to fo-cus more on her class work and less on her Fa-cebook “friends.” Social media can be an addiction that disrupts and takes the place of daily face to face com-munications. As UCCS Professor Maja Kra-kowiak explained, “They [students] may start to rely on social media to
fulfill certain needs, such as stress relief. Some stu-dents may feel a sense of withdrawal or loss from not being able to check their Facebook pages; they may wonder what they are missing. On the other hand, perhaps ban-ning social media for a week will make some students realize just how much time they spend keeping up with social media sites.” Technology, and social networking in particular, is not without its ben-efits. For instance, when students struggle to coor-dinate time to meet for a group project, the inter-net makes it possible to “meet.” While this is one benefit of the internet, so-cial networking sites are only as useful as they are time consuming. Finding a healthy balance and a safe reliance on these sites is important to the student’s functionality in school.
Facebook ban hits PennsylvaniaRyan [email protected]
WORK@SCRIBENow hiring writers and photographers!
Email [email protected] or call (719) 255-3658 for details.
Photo by Ariel LattimoreDr. John Brock, international economic educator.
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newsPage 6 September 28 to October 4
Students, administrators and the Chancellor gath-ered in the free speech zone by the mountain lion on Friday, Sept. 24 to pro-test Amendments 60, 61 and 101, scheduled to ap-pear on the ballot this No-vember. Chancellor Pam Shock-ley-Zalaback opened the event, “I, along with other administrators here, are on leave so that we might address our personal opinions of these issues.” Shokley-Zalaback took a leave of absence so that at the rally she would not be speaking as a public figure but as a concerned citizen and member of the higher education community. “It is incumbent to edu-cate ourselves and those we come in contact with about these issues,” she continued. “This upcom-ing election is about the future of Colorado.” Proposition 101 pro-poses amending the Colo-rado statutes to: reduce the state income tax rate from 4.63 percent to 4.5 percent in 2011, and to 3.5 percent gradually over time; reduce or eliminate taxes and fees on vehicle purchases, registrations, leases and rentals over the next four years; eliminate all state and local taxes and fees on telecommu-nication services, except 911 fees; and require voter approval to create or increase fees on vehicles and telecommunication services.
Amendment 60 propos-es amending the Colorado Constitution to: repeal the current voter-approved authority of local govern-ments to keep property taxes above their consti-tutional limits; establish expiration dates for future voter-approved property tax increases; require publicly owned enterpris-es to pay property taxes and reduce local property tax rates to offset the new revenue; and provide new voting rights to certain property owners in Colo-rado and permit citizens to petition all local govern-ments to reduce property taxes.
Amendment 61 propos-es amending the Colorado Constitution to: prohibit
all new state government borrowing after 2010; prohibit new local gov-ernment borrowing after 2010, unless approved by voters; limit the amount and length of time of local government borrowing; and require that tax rates be reduced after borrow-ing is fully repaid, accord-ing to ballotpedia.com. Those in opposition to these measures said the cut in taxes would only be detrimental to higher edu-cation and the community at large. The University of Colorado Board of Re-gents passed a resolu-tion on July 16 to oppose Amendments 60 and 61 and Proposition 101. Cit-ies that have spoken out or passed resolutions against the proposed measures in-clude Monte Vista, Frisco, Ouray County, Colorado Springs and Grand Junc-tion among others, accord-ing to ballotperdia.com. According to opponents, Amendment 60 will result in a loss in more than one billion dollars in funding for schools, and school districts will be required to cut property taxes by 50 percent, leading to school closures and fewer teach-ers. Amendment 61 oppo-nents argue that it would eliminate Colorado’s abil-ity to build or expand its schools, roads, hospitals, college buildings, light rail, water and sewer sys-tems and prisons through the elimination of long-term bonds. Proposition 101 elimi-nates funding for road and bridge construction across the state. This will mean more potholes and crum-bling bridges, they said. The reduction in income tax would also “eliminate a quarter of the state’s revenue from income tax when state budget has al-ready been severely im-pacted by the recession. Such a drastic reduction would mean even more cuts in critical state ser-vices,” according to Don’t Hurt Colorado, an opposi-tion website. Lynne Telford, with Pikes Peak United Way, ex-pressed concern for the ef-fect Amendment 60 could have on the library system. Telford spoke of the im-portance of public librar-ies, “Twenty-six percent of local third graders are not reading at the appro-priate level,” she told the
crowd. “This is not okay with me. Libraries pro-vide services for educa-tion. If this passes we will see a severe decrease in the budget for Pikes Peak Library District staff.” Telford said the Pikes Peak Library District sys-tem has developed two budget plans for the out-come of the election but cautioned those in the crowd that the approval of the Amendment would lead to “the loss of librar-ies; some branches may have to let go of six or seven; 150 staff positions will be lost, and programs will be discontinued.” Colorado Chamber of Commerce member, Donna Nelson, also ad-dressed the crowd. “I, like you, would like to have a little extra money in my pocket. Lower[ing] taxes sounds good. But when we dig deeper, we realize this isn’t the pretty pack-age we were presented with.” Drew Anderson and Kristina Achey were the final speakers. Anderson is one of the 900 trans-fer students welcomed to UCCS this fall. He shared with the crowd how, af-ter dropping out of high school at 15, coming back to school later was one of the best things he could have done. “Education is the process of becoming an active member of soci-ety. If access to education becomes less accessible for you and me and our children, our future is go-ing to be grim.” Anderson called this proposal passing, “the Ar-mageddon of higher edu-cation” and encouraged those present to spread the word. Student Body President Kristina Achey said, “The UCCS Student Govern-ment Association formal-ly opposes these destruc-tive Amendments on the November ballot. These measures will only make a bad situation worse for students, the future work force of this state.” Achey expressed fear for her four-year-old daughter, an increase in tuition and the elimination of programs. Shockley-Zalaback con-cluded the rally with a call to action, “I feel all of us here believe in a better fu-ture for Colorado. We can only do that if we come together and help put an end to these measures.”
Students speak outagainst AmendmentsCatherine [email protected]
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riverrun, the UCCS student and arts journal, is now accepting the following original student work:
-Poetry
DEADLINE: October 29th, 2010
Nothing to submit? Join a commission committee to decide what gets in.
Email [email protected] for submission guidelines and committee information
-Fiction-Non-Fiction
-Drama-Essays
-Photography-Visual Art
The student-run publication, riverrun, is devoted to constructing a creative community. Begun in 1971 by Dr. C. Kenneth Pellow, it has long since been
an avenue through which artists and writers have been able to express their voices.
Photo by Ariel LattimoreKindergartener Anna Starkey cuts the ribbon on the older preschool’s new greenhouse at the Family Development Center.
Preschool debuts new greenhouseAvalon [email protected]
Late last week, the older preschool class of the Fam-ily Development Center hosted the ribbon-cutting ceremony of their new greenhouse. “It’s a lifelong dream of mine,” said Carol Quillin, one of two teachers of the older preschool class. Quillin has been gar-dening with her classes for more than five years. The garden spans the length of the playground outside the classroom, and hosts such variety as carrots, rosemary, peppers, pumpkins, straw-berries, peas, potatoes, salad fixings and native flowers. Quillin uses the space to teach children not only how to care for plants, but also about the science of growing things. The class maintains its own compost pile and, combined with do-nated grounds from nearby coffee shops, prepare their own fertilizer. They also prepare their harvests using
a solar oven and eat togeth-er the fruits – or vegetables – of their labor. The greenhouse is adja-cent to the existing garden, and will be used to further the children’s experiences with nature. Quillin plans to plant a thermometer both inside and out, to help the kids learn about the reten-tion of heat and moisture in-side the greenhouse as well as the solar energy involved in such growth. Nick Starkey, a contrac-tor whose daughter was in Quillin’s class last year, was remodeling a local house and offered unneeded win-dows to Quillin so she might begin building her dream greenhouse. University code dictated that those particular mate-rials couldn’t be used, ex-plained Quillin, but Starkey posted the panes on eBay and donated the proceeds of their sales to Quillin and her class. That money, pooled with a grant from the Mani-tou Springs Garden Club, equated to about $450 and was enough to build the
greenhouse. The ribbon-cutting was accompanied by the older preschool class singing – and signing – a song about gardening, and the reading aloud of a short story about the greenhouse’s construc-tion the kids had created themselves. Anna Starkey, Starkey’s kindergarten-aged daugh-ter, cut the ribbon, after presenting Quillin with a greenhouse-warming gift: a garden gnome, dubbed on the scene as Starkey. “It’s great to watch the kids go pick peas in June, when they first come out,” said Quillin’s husband, Pat-rick, laughing. Patrick regu-larly helps tend the garden and is just as pleased as his wife to be providing the kids with a place to learn to grow. Each spring, the children themselves get to choose what they will grow. “We’re going to start with spinach and cold-weather plants,” said Quillin, ex-plaining the greenhouse’s inaugural season. S
culturePage 7September 28 to October 4
For the frugal college student, chucking a large heavy ball down a nar-row alley is comparable to our childhood days of playing in sand boxes and making mud pies. Consequently, many stu-dents have discovered the simple delights of a competitive bowling game.
Brunswick Zone Bowl-ing Thursday night is col-lege night and with a valid student ID; college students bowl for $1 per game, and $1 for shoes from 9 p.m. to 12 a.m. Wednesday nights are also great nights to go bowling at the Bruns-wick Zone Bowling al-ley. The rate is still $1 per game, however the shoes are $2.99.
Peak Bowl They have the best specials in Colorado Springs. Peak Bowl is 75 cents per game Monday
through Thursday, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Thursday and Sunday after 9 p.m. are dollar bowl nights. That means $1 for shoes and $1 per game. Friday is all-you-can bowl day. The price is $12 and includes shoes as well as unlimited games of bowling.
Harmony Bowl Every night has a dif-ferent special. The best two specials are Tues-day 2-fer nights and Wednesday $1.50 nights. On 2-fer night, a person can get two games for $2, two orders of fries for $2 and two sodas for $2. Wednesday nights are also a great deal with free shoe rental and $1.50 per game played. Sunday is also a great deal with all you can bowl for $8. All week-day specials are applied only after 9 p.m., and the special on Sunday runs all day.
King Pin Lanes They offer great day-time bowling. Specials run all day Monday through Friday 1 p.m. to 5:30 p.m. The price per game is $1.25 and shoe rental is always $2, no matter what time a per-son comes in to bowl. After 9 p.m., the price per game is $1.50 and $2 for shoe rental. If you want to come bowling at King Pin Lanes, it is cheapest to come during the day on a week day.
Mr. Biggs Bowling Al-ley It’s a cosmic experi-ence. Mr. Biggs bowling alley may be a little bit more expensive than the others, but it’s worth the totally cosmic experi-ence. The lanes are lit with black lights, which proves to have a fun at-mosphere for everyone involved. The price is always a constant $2 per game and shoe rental is $3. The extra price may also be worth it for the smoke-free environment offered at Mr. Biggs.
The student guide to bowlingKristin [email protected]
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I don’t like to write bad restaurant reviews. I would rather send patrons somewhere else than vil-ify a particular restaurant on a bad day, and poorly run places tend to fizzle on their own. Because BJ’s Restaurant and Bre-whouse just opened in the new University Vil-lage close to campus I felt obliged to review it, even though I was not that im-pressed. The problem with BJ’s is that it is just too big. It is a combination of every food marketing concept in the last twenty years, thrown into a Wall-Mart sized shell and trimmed out in bad Home Depot. It’s a brew pub (although they don’t actually make any beer in those faux tanks in the wall) mixed with an upscale pizza joint, PF Chang’s, Chile’s, Applebee’s, The Cracker Barrel, Outback Steakhouse, Noodles and Texas Roadhouse. The only thing they lack is a dollar menu and a drive-through Starbuck’s on the side. Copying trends is not creative. Food and drink
are the literal lifeblood of our existence so any mor-sel or beverage qualifies, but making morsels into meals and water into wine are the creative forces that keep dining interest-ing, and restaurants open. The underlying problem is that this much food means too many cooks in the kitchen with too many ingredients in too many individual containers that sit around for way too long. They have sliders, let-tuce wraps, southwestern egg rolls, calzones, ten house specialty pizzas, sixteen sandwich selec-tions, nine signature sal-ads, five kinds of soup, six burgers, eight pasta favor-ites, five types of stuffed baked potatoes, sixteen entrees, nine dessert se-lections and a gluten-free menu. It’s like they raided God’s pantry. My visit was as un-expectedly uncomfort-able as going through the interrogation-room-like, one-sided-glass-covered revolving front door. I asked to sit at the bar, pulled out my laptop, and tried to make smile con-tact. Ten minutes ended in an irritated wave to an obviously doing noth-
ing dudebro behind the bar. He got me a beer, but promptly disappeared to the service end of the bar to resume doing nothing. The only upside of the experience was the polite and prompt young lady who eventually got me the tome of a menu and took my order. A sign ad-vertised happy hour in the bar area with $1-off pints
and half-off mini pizzas, so choosing amongst the endless list of overpriced items wasn’t difficult. Not surprisingly, BJ’s has a version of nearly every type of microbrew. I chose their signature brew, the Jeremiah Red Irish-Style Strong Ale. It wasn’t particularly Irish or strong, so I tried the Berry Cider; but it was
like the Bartles and James version of a Shirley Tem-ple. The mini pizza on a crispy crust with Roma to-matoes, wafer-thin strips of fresh basil and a pinch of sausage was OK, but only worth $4.50 at half price on happy hour. My tab for a beer, cider and mini pizza with tip was over $20, which is too
much for a happy hour. Potential UCCS stu-dent restaurant workers might be tempted to cash in on the dollars filtering through this potential em-ployer, but the corporate restaurant means dealing with managers who use terms like profit and sell-ing potential instead of good customer service; so be careful.
BJ’s Brewhouse: Too big with too many options Brock [email protected]
Photo by Ariel LattimoreDespite the large amounts of money you have to throw down at BJ’s, you do NOT get a happy ending.
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Coco Chanel once said, “Fashion is not some-thing that exists in dress-es only. Fashion is in the sky, in the street; fash-ion has to do with ideas, the way we live, what is happening.” Fashion is confidence and an art. Although the outfit may be laid back and messy, everything has been stra-tegically placed; that’s the art of it. Throughout the de-cades, there is always at least one fashion icon that sets the standards. In the 1960s, the top fash-ionistas were Audrey Hepburn, Jackie O. and Edie Sedgewick. In the 1980s, icons Madonna and Cyndi Lauper were huge. Today, the forefront of fashion is dictated by worldwide superstars like Lady Gaga and her outrageous get-ups. Fashion, like history, music and art, tends to run
in cycles. What was “in” when our parents were young has swung back to the limelight. Right now the 1960s and 1980s are huge. Everything about these generations rocked: the music, the hair and especially the fashion. Not only are the threads of the Terminator’s day back; they are ready for their close up. From the 1960s we have copied the fur vests (faux of course), the adorable fedora hat, and the high-waisted pant. From the 1980s, bold neon prints and colors are all the rage, along with oversized jewelry, perfected layered clothes, knee high boots and leg-gings. The challenging part about all these looks is that they require certain masteries. The previous generations were more about music and fashion because they had no In-ternet, and much less to distract from everyday
life. Thanks to Google and iTunes, we are able to relive these genera-tions and not just read about them. Take some tips from Madonna and her “Des-perately Seeking Susan” era. Madonna is the epit-ome of the 1980s, and lucky for us, she and her daughter Lourdes (Lola) Leon have created their own clothing line called Material Girl. These out-fits seem to have literally come out of her virginal closet. Sold at Macy’s, this line is pretty afford-able. If the corporate feel gives you hives, skip Macy’s and head to The Leechpit at 708 N. Weber St. in downtown Colo-rado Springs. This indie shop sells great vintage clothing from the 1950s straight through to the 1990s. Not much for shopping in person? Check out on-line stores like Modcloth.com and Lulu.com.
The past called: They want their clothes backAmanda [email protected]
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After 18 months of planning, renovating and remodeling, the former Pub opens tonight as Clyde’s, a new campus hangout for students, staff and faculty alike. At the soft opening late last week, Susan Szpyrka, Associate Vice Chancellor of Adminis-tration and Finance, be-gan by thanking every-one involved in making Clyde’s a reality. Those recognized included University Center Di-rector Jeff Davis, UCCS Architect Carolyn Fox, Student Activities Coor-dinator Mitch Karstens, Director of Auxilarly Services Marketing Ta-mara Moore, Sodexo General Manager Russ Saunkeah, former SGA President Daniel Garcia and current SGA Presi-dent Kristina Achey, as well as a number of other contractors, architects, mechanical engineers and designers. “It was really unique for us,” expounded Sz-pyrka, smiling, “to hire a designer…It was a la-bor of love for our stu-dents.” Obtaining a liquor license was one of the largest stumbling blocks in the development of Clyde’s. Ultimately, Saunkeah, Chief of Po-lice Jim Spice and Direc-tor of Emergency Servic-es Steve Linhart helped it along – which, noted Szpyrka, was somewhat unusual. “To have been helped out by the Chief of Po-lice,” she said, laughing. Three-two beer is a thing of the past for UCCS. Clyde’s serves a full selection of beers, ten domestic and elev-en imported; there are a number of white and red wines from which to
choose, including a Cup-cake merlot and a fruity white zinfandel. “I’m so excited this place is serving real beer now,” said student Spen-cer Foote. The bartenders have to be constantly vigilant to ensure that no under-age students are able to purchase alcohol and to prevent older students purchasing it for them. “We’ll be very strict,” said Sodexo’s Jen Voor-hes, a bartender at Clyde’s. “If you order a pitcher, I need an ID for every cup that goes out.” Voorhes noted that if underage students at-tempt to purchase alco-hol, or if an older student buys drinks for those un-derage, “they can do it once and aren’t allowed back in.” Szpyrka said, “If someone’s procuring alcohol for another per-son, the student will face criminal charges. But we need this place for people 21 and older. We need this place.” When discussing the decision not to have mixed drinks available in Clyde’s, Voorhes said, “It’s a gathering place, not a bar inviting stu-dents to get drunk.” There is also a full menu available at Clyde’s, including slid-ers, chicken wings, piz-za, cheese sticks, salads, fries and more. Popcorn is always free for stu-dents – when it’s made, qualified Szpyrka – from the popcorn-maker just inside the doors. Clyde’s has seating for 90, but can fit 151, will be open seven days a week and close just a half hour before the UC, which leaves it open till 10:30 p.m. on week-
nights. “We’ve never had that kind of service before,” Szpyrka said. Throughout the year, Clyde’s will host a num-ber of student events, in-cluding karaoke Fridays, poetry slams, club events, concerts and the broad-casting of sports events on three flat screens and a projector. On Nov. 2, Clyde’s will offer a pay-per-view boxing match. “Mitch has it booked,” Szpyrka stated. While clubs and or-ganizations can request Clyde’s for their gather-ings or events, the new pub cannot be scheduled for private events. Any event must be open to the public and not restrict others from enjoying the space. To schedule an event, contact Mitch Karstens in OSA. Szpyrka also looks forward to the return of Café Scientifique to UCCS at Clyde’s, where the Office of Research and Innovation can meet to discuss the latest breakthroughs and ideas of the scientific commu-nity. “I think [Clyde’s is] wonderful,” said Chan-cellor Pam Shockley-Zalabak, “I love the new Clyde’s. It’s wonderful for students, but I think a lot of faculty and staff will enjoy it as well.” “It’s going to work,” encouraged Anthony Cordova, MOSAIC di-rector, “I wanted it dark with a good atmosphere. That’s the way a club is supposed to be.” “It’s my new favorite place on campus,” said Achey. The grand opening tonight will welcome Clyde, the mountain lion after whom the bar is named, on the lawn di-rectly outside.
clydesPage 8 September 28 to October 4
Game onStory by Avalon Manly I Photos by Ariel Lattimore
Clyde’s: Where the popcorn is always free.
Clockwise from top: Evan Shelton plays pool during opening night. People mingle and enjoy the food. Daniel Garcia enjoys a drink at the open bar.S
culturePage 9September 28 to October 4
For generations, we have held true to our American values. We have looked alcohol-ism in its ruddy face, and we have scoffed. We have turned to our beers before our friends, and we have shed more than a few tears and gained more than a few pounds over an empty case of Bud Light. Drinking games erupt-ed from a society at-tracted to competitively induced inebriation. Flip cup, king’s cup, quarters and beer pong inundated the party scene. This forced individuals to part with their morals, throw back a couple shots and let freedom ring…them onto the floor like a life-less blow-up doll. Last May, “The most badass thing to hit the streets since electronic monopoly,” came face to face with the revered masculinity of every pre-tentious college male in
America. Originating in the South, “bros icing bros” scoured the lands, drink in hand, preying on the homophobic; it uses wit, creativity and dick-like behavioral traits to embarrass co-workers, friends and students abound. “Icing” or “getting iced” has very simple rules, and like most drinking games is sure to amuse, emasculate and facilitate a drunken rage when properly played. For those unfamiliar with the game, if a per-son sees a Smirnoff Ice, he or she must get down on one knee and chug it. This is to be done with little or no hesitation, but slowly enough to al-low the “icer” to snap a few pictures. One UCCS student explained, “[Be-ing Iced] sucked, it was super warm and tasted like aged piss.” Defense mechanisms include getting a new group of friends or always hav-ing a Smirnoff on hand. In which case, an “ice
block,” occurs and the original icer must serve the intended punishment. Icing is an art and while many college stu-dents would rather throw a Ping-Pong ball into a red cup or put a finger down in “never have I
ever,” there are those with enough tact and ef-fort to ice their fellow neighbor with audacious indignity. Try strapping a bot-tle to the back of a dog, burying one in Creatine powder, hiding one in a
hanging plant, a back-pack, behind beer in the fridge or under the covers. Shoot for early morning hours, outside a downtown coffee shop, during a mid-day break or before a large group of people. Liven up a sau-
sage-fest with a few de-meaning Smirnoffs stra-tegically placed around the house. Effort is key; creativity is crucial, and if you don’t have over a 3.0 you probably won’t find this game very fun anyway.
Bros icing bros: The art of humiliated drinkingJessica [email protected]
Photo by Carrie WoodruffTwo students of age take a knee after being “iced”
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The odd but cool part about “I am Niko-la Tesla” is that it is not about Nikola Tesla. It’s about a guy in a hole wearing a “dork” shirt. Artistic Director and playwright Murray Ross wrote, “We felt that Tesla was so much about the future, so deep-ly committed to innovation, the proper way of honoring him was to create an entirely new play, set in the present.” Those, and there will be many, look-ing for a documentary about Tesla’s ex-traordinary summer spent here in Colo-rado Springs may be disappointed; but, as Ross suggested, that’s what the exist-ing works about his life are for. This play is about innovation or, more precisely, our collective modern conceptions of it. Luke, the lead character, is a bright American young man of Serbian descent who languishes throughout the play, digging a hole in his mother’s basement. He literally digs himself deeper as the play unfolds around him. The constant hum of Tesla’s 60-cycle generator fills the darkened, wire-and-transistor-filled theatre, and gives the play a mad scientist feel. Luke’s mother, Andjela, is concerned that he spends too much time in the basement working on a replica of Te-sla’s wireless electricity broadcaster, so she hires Rex, a hilariously pathetic new-age hipster psychologist (complete with ponytail and tight jeans), to “talk” with Luke.
Luke, who is the only relatively sane character in the play despite his delu-sions of Nikola Tesla, enjoys talking about his very real problems of not hav-ing a girlfriend – at first. He soon figures out that Rex is sim-ply spying on him and making moves on his mom. Luke calls him “Ziggy Doo-schmeister.” Nikola Tesla appears to the audience, and to Luke, as the white glove-wearing Serbian germiphobe that history tells us he was. He is only a delusion, but through his dialogue, taken entirely from Tesla’s actual writing, we learn about his inven-tions…and his madness. The heart of the play resides in our modern conceptions of the fine line be-tween genius and madness. Luke, com-plete with Superman tattoo (hint, hint) represents the genius; and Tesla, the ge-nius gone bad. This much is clear to us, but the comedy of this play lies in the other characters’ perceptions of Luke and his apparent delusions. Izzy, Luke’s cleaning lady and poten-tial girlfriend, represents the resolution of the play – that is, getting out of the hole and talking to real people. Her de-scription of alternating current as “ping pong in a hose” is not only funny, but apt. This play is not about invention; it’s about real life. My favorite line of the play is when Luke replies to his mother, “At least there’s no bullshit in the basement.” And he is right. Too much of our modern world is focused on the extraordinary, and the real brilliance of our time, the Lukes, are often stuck in their mother’s basement.
I am not Nikola Tesla, but this guy thinks I amBrock [email protected]
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Photo courtesy of Wikimedia CommonsS
culturePage 10 September 28 to October 4
The Silly Bandz revo-lution has taken off at a remarkable speed, in mul-tiple age groups and with unprecedented results. They seem to be no more than rubber bands shaped in many different themes, but based on society’s addiction, there must be something more, right? There are football team Silly Bandz, Disney Silly Bandz, Marvel superhe-roes, Hello Kitty, ani-mals, holidays, religions, other sports and many more themed bandz. There are themes geared toward boys, some geared toward girls, and they are quickly becom-ing the fashion statement of the year. Elementary school students are wear-ing them, as are middle school, high school and even college students. As rubber bands, silly bandz do stretch out and do not retain their shape, so it makes little sense why people are so deter-mined to wear particular shapes. However, fash-
ion often rarely makes much sense. People of all ages love to express themselves and silly bandz give people a quick and easy way to do so. They are relatively cheap, easy to find and there is enough variety that there is something for everyone. As men-tioned, there are plenty of themes to choose from in all kinds of colors. Silly Bandz are prac-tically trading cards now. Elementary and middle school students will pull out their silly bandz and trade each other for the prettiest colors and cool-est designs. They choose their favorites and try to trade these with their friends. Kids collect them the way our genera-tion collected and traded Pokemon or Yu-Gi-Oh cards. Silly Bandz have be-come not only a fashion statement, but a status symbol as well. They can represent what a person likes; this could elevate or lower a student’s sta-tus within his/her school. Students are judged by
how “cool” their Silly Bandz are, and even by whether or not they have them at some schools. Students are even con-sidered nicer and more popular if they give away their Silly Bandz in the elementary school envi-ronment. Self-expression by Silly Bandz can take in-teresting and unexpected forms. A high school boy who considers him-self a “hippie” wears red, yellow and green Silly Bandz. A college student might wear a cross one to represent his faith or your teacher might have one shaped like Elvis Presley. Silly Bandz are an ingenious invention be-cause they are cheap and easy to make. They play into our individualistic society, and allow wear-ers to choose Silly Bandz that reflect personal val-ues, ideas, likes and dis-likes. People use Silly Bandz as a form of self-expression in new and surprising ways, but the trend will probably last as long as most childhood trends do.
Rubber bands of self-expressionShelby [email protected]
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“The Town:” Better than Afflecks’s first directorial
Ben Affleck’s “The Town,” had a fast paced, holy hell this is going to be good, look at his abs, movie trail-er. As it turns out, I should have brought my laptop and paused the trailer at 1:08 so I could watch the film, that failed to give his stomach adequate screen time, and drool over his still-frame image shirtless doing pull-ups. Next time I’ll go pre-pared with a wallet-sized cut out. But I digress. In the film, Ben Affleck plays Doug Makay, a bank robber in the Charleston area based on the novel “Prince of Thieves.” He and his crew pride them-selves in their ability to take what they want when they want it. When Doug was six years old, his mother disappeared. Shortly after, his father was sent to prison. After these events Doug turned to Jem, his quick triggered, closest thing to a brother, friend. Jem’s tendency to bash heads and abduct innocent women establishes the premise of the film: bank
robber turned potential good guy hoping to get away and find himself. The film opens with four men in terrifyingly grue-some masks; if I saw one to-night I might Mother Nature kick them in the face with my energy legs. With guns, gruff voices and skill, the robbers successfully bring the bank to its knees, but not before abducting Claire, the bank’s sweet and terrified manager. After releasing her un-harmed, the crew discovers she lives just on the other side of the Monument. Her proximity puts them all in danger and Jem begs Doug to let him scare her into hid-ing. Doug promises to keep an eye on her and spends a few days on surveillance before bumping into her “accidently” at a local laun-dromat. After watching her fold clothes, tears in her eyes, clearly rattled from the week’s events, Doug steps in and offers to buy her a drink. A romance blooms, and while this relationship is cliché and we all know what’s going to eventually happen, it works. The romance works be-cause it is a successfully
implemented movie device and although coincidental, Doug and Claire are a good match on film and in bed. (Although this scene was a little brief for Hollywood) As their relationship deep-ens, the FBI closes in, deter-mined to bring the four men to their knees. Doug’s father, Stephen, is serving time for a past robbery and murder. In the film, Doug visits his father whose callous behav-ior reminds Doug he has a choice. Soon after his visit, Doug decides it is time to leave the life of crime, do one last job and run away with Claire to only God knows where. However, countless obstacles, both within the crew and behind police lines make this nearly impossible to execute. What a surprise. Quite honestly, I left the theatre slightly disappoint-ed; I expected more action, more sex and more scenes with a shirtless Ben Affleck. I mean, that is why I de-cided to go in the first place. Not that I don’t like a good action film or a little blood around the edges, but the ending left me feeling more or less despondent. And that’s never a good thing.
Jessica [email protected]
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As the UCCS golf team headed home Mon-day, Sept. 20 after win-ning their second tourna-ment of the season at the 2010 Gene Miranda Fal-con Invitational, the men sent an alarming message nationally and locally to the Rocky Mountain Athletic Conference. By winning their first two tournaments of the sea-son, the men’s golf team may make a serious run for a national champion-ship this year. The Mountain Lions outlasted and outplayed 17 other Division 1 schools to claim the Fal-con Invitational award at the Eisenhower Golf Club’s Blue Course. The men flew solo as the only Division II squad competing in the tourna-ment. “Talent-wise, there’s absolutely zero differ-ence from our team com-pared to a D-I school; the results show that,” commented senior Riley Andrews. In an event where UCCS has never placed higher than seventh (2007), the team man-aged to defeat every Colorado-based Division 1 school, including sister school University of Col-orado at Boulder, Colo-rado State, Air Force, University of Denver and Northern Colorado. The most salient statistic atop the list may be how UCCS knocked off No. 16 San Diego and No. 19 UNLV. UCCS was tied af-ter two rounds of play on Sunday, Sept. 19 due in part to a five-under
par 139 finish by senior Chris Shoop. The Moun-tain Lions shot a team score of 573, which marked them at three-under par. Shoop also placed second in running for best individual med-alist after the first day of competition. The men concluded the tournament Sept. 20, shooting a three-under par 861 and finished as the only team to shoot under par for the event. Sophomore Spencer Biersdorff shot a team high two-under par 70, while Andrews and se-nior Brian Morfeld each were at an even par 72. Shoop shot 74 and ju-nior Michael Tilghman recorded a solid score of 75. The squad appears to be off to a phenomenal start, and while tourna-ments are won during the season, players are made during the offsea-son. According to head coach Phil Trujillo, the team continued to work hard and improve over the hot, dry summer months. “The team played in many tournaments throughout the sum-mer to keep their games sharp. We require them to play in at least seven top events such as US OPEN Qualifier and State Amateur tourna-ments,” Trujillo said. “They got a chance to work with their own swing coaches and get themselves prepared for the season. The sharp-ness of their play is [due to] the fact that we have a bunch of seniors with experience at this level.” Early season success is nothing foreign to the
team and Trujillo made it clear that the men will have to remain at a con-sistent level of error-free golf in order to obtain their sixth consecutive RMAC Championship title and contend for a national championship. UCCS fell just short of pursuing a national title last year.“We will have to con-tinue to grow as a team and pay attention to the basic things,” he said. “Staying focused on the little things, like not missing short putts and staying focused on every shot. The teams that win championships don’t make mistakes,” he added.“We didn’t play well enough to make it last year. Some guys didn’t play to the level that we needed them to and that hurt us,” Trujillo said.
“It’s a tough thing to do getting to the NCAAs and most people don’t understand how hard it is to make it. We play against the West Region which is all the Califor-nia schools who play
year round. I always feel like we can make it; it’s what we work for and spend so much time re-cruiting the best players we possibly can.” UCCS will look for continued success as
they travel to Phoenix, Arizona to compete in the Grand Canyon Fall Invitational Oct. 4-5. For updates, game scores and coverage, students can check www.GoMount-ainLions.com.
sportsPage 11September 28 to October 4
Men’s Golf makes school history by winning Division-1 Falcon Invitational at Air ForceMatthew [email protected]
Photos by Michelle WoodUCCS golf showcases their talents at the Falcon Inivitational, proving why they will be contenders for the national championships this year
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sportsPage 12 September 28 to October 4
September has been both a challenging and re-warding month for the men’s and women’s soccer pro-grams. As of late, the men’s soccer team has struggled to find the back of the net, and while this has not stopped them from battling day in and day out, going over 400 min-utes without a goal can be mentally taxing. Through these difficulties, however, the Mountain Lions know the points will come as long as they keep working hard. “The character of our team right now is still really strong, we’re still fired up to play, and we’re still ready to get after it,” said Coach Henry Ellis. Following Fri-day’s tie against Mesa State, Coach Ellis expressed his optimism about ending the goal-scoring drought. “To score a goal, which we’ve struggled doing even though we’ve had numerous opportunities, you know we’ll take that. Walking away with a point after what we’ve been through, we’ll take it.” Senior goalkeeper Adam Liszewski has been a con-sistent presence, keeping his GAA low at just over 2 per contest. The team’s leading scorer so far this season is junior Matt Friesen with three goals, followed by fellow junior Carlos Verdugo with two. “We change line ups a lot and I think we finally found the line up that works best for us,” said Liszewski. The women’s team has played above .500 soccer with a record of 4-3 overall and 1-2 in the RMAC. Close losses against Colorado Mines and Fort Lewis has the team anxious for redemption, and show that they’re on the cusp of going from a good team to a great team. Freshman Goalkeeper Kelly Schroeder has raised her game to the collegiate level keeping her GAA just above one. Junior Kristin Preble has provided the most offense with four goals in the early season while junior Julia Saenz has led the team with six assists. The women’s team also scored the first points toward the Steel and Silver Cup with their win over CSU-Pueb-lo in a thrilling overtime victory on Sept. 22. This Friday, Oct. 1, the women’s team will face Colorado Christian and on Oct. 3, the men’s team will battle Regis. Both games will be held at Mountain Lion Stadium. S
Hard work pays off for both Men’s and Women’s SoccerAlex [email protected]
As UCCS took on the No. 12 Nebraska Kearny Lopers and Chadron State Eagles on the road this weekend, the Lady Moun-tain Lions volleyball team came out with a 1-1 re-cord. While losing in three (25-19, 25-8, 25-15) to the Lopers may have been tough, Junior Alex Nuttall appeared optimistic, say-ing, “It taught us to come together and fight as a team.” The team responded Saturday night against Chadron State with a 3-0 (25-17, 25-14, 25-14) vic-tory of their own by out hitting the Eagles .268 to .028. UCCS only had 10 errors compared to the Chadrons’ 23. “It taught us to be con-fident and to play UCCS volleyball,” remarked Nuttall after the game. “The middles did well
and all the freshmen got to play, even.” Nuttall and senior Ken-dall Utz combined for 21 of the teams 43 digs, while Nuttall and Ntuz added 11 and 10 kills, respectively. “Kendall passed really well, Lindsay Stitch led us in assists, and we scored from all areas of the court, it was a fun night,” re-called Nuttall, “We could just set the middles and expect them to score. It re-ally gives us a lot of confi-dence in playing together and playing as a team.” UCCS appears to have found their groove and after sophomore Nikki Kinzer’s record setting performance last week in which she set the school record for most blocks in a game, the women can contend high at the net. The lady Mountain Li-ons will aim to improve their RMAC success as they take on conference rival Colorado Mines Sept.28 at the Gallogly Events Center. S
Women’s Volleyball split 1-1 over the weekend, head into crucial RMAC play
Separate from the regular football intramural season is the 1st annual Chipotle Burrito Bol. Played out on the West Lawn, the three day long football tournament held during Back to the Bluffs weekend, Oct. 1 through 3, will feature students from UCCS and cross town rival Colorado College. Entry is $50, which may keep some students away, but the win-ning team will receive championship t-shirts and $20 Chipotle gift cards for their efforts. It’s open to men and women with all-male and co-ed divisions. The students running the tournament are a part of the Sports Management Program and “… will get to apply all their skills in various areas taught in the class from hiring referees to event management,” said class instructor Glenn Steimling. The championship game will be played at Moun-tain Lion Stadium Sunday, Oct. 3, with the losers going home hungry—literally.
Burrito Bol
Photo courtesy of gomountainlions.com
Alex [email protected]
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All you vegetarians and vegans out there cover your eyes, you will soon be reading about meat. No straight ladies, not that kind. We’re talking about the kind of meat you should be sinking your teeth into, meat so tasty you just want to sow it up and wear the way you wear fur…yes, ladies and gents we are talking about Lady Ga Ga’s slimy, meaty (pun indented), at-tention grabbing dress. The spectacle was worn by Ga Ga to the recent MTV Video Music Awards where she said passion-ately that it represented her gay fans...aww, how kind of you gag....*literal gag* “It is a devastation to me that I know my fans who are gay ... feel like they have governmental op-pression on them. That’s actually why I wore the meat tonight,” Gaga said at the ceremony. I just feel sorry for Cher, who had to hold her purse and then hug the woman.Members of the LGBT community cannot marry, visit their loved ones in
the hospital, have children in a way that is socially respectable (adoption is bad, apparently), serve openly in the military or expose certain aspects of their identity in certain places, which I would say, IS governmental oppres-sion…it isn’t just some-thing we feel. When my girlfriend and I can’t walk though cer-tain areas of town holding hands for fear of getting our limbs torn to pieces it isn’t just because we feel like we might get looked at funny. Take out the feel and insert some proper grammar and the meat statement would have been passable. Just in case we didn’t understand whether this meant we are the chopped meat or the cattle, Ga Ga reiterated at her rally for repealing “Don’t ask, Don’t tell.” “Equality is the prime rib of America, but because I am gay, I don’t get to enjoy the greatest cut of meat my country has to offer. Shouldn’t everyone deserve to wear the same meat dress I do?” Ga Ga asked the crowd. I understand the point that is trying to be reached here, but if everyone wore the same meat dress you do, it would cost what butchers who have ana-lyzed the dress have de-termined was only about $100 worth of beef. This means it would smell, go bad and contain only low quality beef…which those who can’t afford steak are used to eating anyway.
Wearing raw meat is just rude. That’s a waste of food. We all know you can afford to wear some-one else’s meal as an out-fit, but please, don’t actu-ally flaunt it. Ga Ga later told Ellen, “If we don’t stand up for what we believe in and if we don’t fight for our rights pretty soon, we’re going to have as much rights as the meat on our own bones. And I am not a piece of meat.”This statement is well worth agreeing with, ex-cept the part where she brings the attention back to herself. If the dress re-ally was created to make a political statement about the treatment of members of the LGBT community, then keep it there, on the community. It isn’t that I don’t appreci-ate Ga Ga’s support; I do. The LGBT movement has long been without a pub-lic figure and would only benefit from one…if they represent the community with the respect and un-derstanding it deserves. I appreciate having a public figure to draw attention to a percentage of our popu-lation that for too long has been overlooked and disregarded. I would ask, however, that if Ga Ga is to become that figure, that she remain unwavering in her support and avoid reverting into silence. I am confused by the meat dress and hope that the next time a metaphor that doesn’t detract from the community and its needs is used instead.
Earlier this month, on Sept. 11, a Florida pastor by the name of Terry Jones inflamed controversy with a plan for his church to host a burning of multiple Qurans (the holiest book of the Islamic religion) as a way of retaliating against Muslim extremists. Need-less to say, this notion did not go over well with Mus-lims and much to my own pride, most Americans. Now, I’m going to be dangerously honest here: when I first heard about this pastor’s idea a little more than three weeks ago, my former combat-minded side of me reacted instantly and I thought to myself: “So what? They have no problem burning our Bibles and American flags…” But this line of think-ing only lasted for about 10 seconds, until another thought occurred to me: the fact that the scope of this planned burning would attack far more than just one tiny fraction of Muslim extremists but all of Islam’s followers. It
would include the majority of the Muslims who actu-ally try to live their lives peacefully among others. And then, I finally real-ized that if I could come to this conclusion in a matter of 20 seconds or so all on my own, what the hell was wrong with this 74-year-old pastor? That Jones’s anger to-ward those responsible for the massacre which killed close to 3,000 innocent Americas just over nine years ago prompted him to have this thought is under-standable. Heck, I myself have plenty of reason to be angry at the most radi-cal elements of the said religion; as a former Ma-rine Corps scout having survived four IED explo-sions (two that resulted in substantial concussions), I have seen countless bullets fly past me, and witnessed numerous friends either wounded or killed all in the name of Islam (dubbed so by irrational extrem-ists); I can still conclude to myself that not only is it wrong to offend so many in this manner (by burning Qurans), but the act dou-bles as an outright vile and vicious attack at the hearts of those Muslims who live their lives harmoniously. And so can thousands of others with similar experi-ences. In the week leading up to the planned burning, Pas-tor Jones finally rescinded on his ardent stance of performing what would
have easily been one of the most outrageous acts of hate ever publicly per-formed on American soil. Jones only did this at the behest and strong advice of some of the top politi-cal leaders in this nation, who warned him that his actions would cause even more harm and danger to actively deployed Ameri-can service members; to which Jones responded by saying the following: “We are, of course, now against any other group burning Qurans,” and further add-ing, “We would right now ask no one to burn Qurans. We are absolutely strong on that. It is not the time to do it.” The fact that it took politicians to properly edu-cate Jones on the dangers that his actions would have posed to troops overseas only proves how much of an idiot he really is. In fact, it reminds me of a shirt that I’ve seen worn around with the caption reading: “Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.” Of course the “large groups” being Jones and any of his merry moron band of follow-ers who would have as-sisted him in his supreme insult to 22 percent of the world’s population – in other words, 1.57 billion Muslims. So, I guess the moral that can be drawn is this: Don’t promote idiots into positions as ordained pas-tors.
opinionPage 13September 28 to October 4
Stephen [email protected]
Ever wonder what happens when power is given to idiots?
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Catherine [email protected]
Meat gone Ga Ga
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Photo Illustration by Ariel LattimoreLady Gaga sports a dress made of meat at the MTV Musc Awards, while a hun-gry dog watches and wonders why this Earth is such a cruel, cruel place.
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On every student’s degree progress report can be found a list of required courses seemingly unrelated to his or her chosen field of study. Liberal Arts majors will find themselves taking math courses, while scientists and engineers are forced to take anthropology and writing classes. This system results in a bunch of students whin-ing amongst themselves dur-ing passing periods, grump-ily considering transfer to some magical college where they think these required classes don’t exist. The fact of the matter is that UCCS’ approach, which is the same as most every college in the U.S., is meant to make students well-round-
ed. This philosophy on edu-cation is better known as the Athenian education system, and has been around since, well, the time we all think of when we hear “Athens.” Back in the day, the popular idea in Athens was that boys must be taught to read and write, but also to wrestle and wield a spear, such that they could be productive citizens during war or peacetime. This is opposite of the policies in Sparta, of course, where boys were expected to kill things at any given moment, impregnate wom-en and have abs with which you could grate cheese. In this modern age, the same principles apply to dif-ferent types of universities. You could go somewhere like the School of Mines to learn nothing but math all the time, and you would be closer to the Spartan end of the scale of learning (ex-cepting the impregnating part; let’s be honest). Or, you could go to a school like UCCS and learn about Eng-lish, math, humanities and maps and compasses. While it would be more fun to be an extra in a movie starring Ge-rard Butler, you’re going to
find more sustainable career opportunities (and friends) by following the Athenian approach to education. So stop complaining. Se-riously, just stop it. I know, math is hard and you’ll nev-er need to find the area of a circle ever again. But devel-oping critical thinking skills while in college ensures that your job isn’t eventually replaced by a two-line pro-gram in Java. Math majors need to stop complaining about required liberal arts classes, too. Yes, you could be at home inte-grating some functions in-stead of writing a research paper on the benefits of glycerin soap for your weird-smelling humanities teacher. But being able to find the fourth root of infinity is of no use to anyone if you’re not able to communicate said knowledge to the greater public. No, wheezing while using several multi-syllabic gibberish math-words in a tone generally reserved for use by Scottish lords does not count. Develop some so-cial skills already. My point is that going to a college like UCCS and obtaining a well-rounded
education means something in today’s world. You don’t get that degree without, at some point, having to suck it up and learn something. If all the Communications majors crying about col-lege algebra had their way, their BA would be even more meaningless than it’s
already bound to be. Just imagine if your potential future employer knew you had to take only the easiest classes in the easiest major from a bunch of instructors who couldn’t care less. I doubt you’d get the job. Whereas if you graduate from an institution known
for challenging its stu-dents, for pushing them to try new and difficult things, potential future employers will give your resume more than a single glance. You might even get that invita-tion for a phone interview from Target that you’ve al-ways wanted.
I remember when a boy chased me through the halls in my slippers and pinched me so hard I had bruises all over my arms. It’s because he liked me. That was actually ter-rifying. I remember when I was in fifth grade the boy I liked – the boy with the blonde peach fuzz hair – pushed me during recess. That night I wrote in my diary, “Nathan pushed me today. He must like me.” I remember my first kiss: by the end of it I was not only out of breath, but completely certain tongues were disgusting, and pecks would be more than adequate in the fu-ture. While these physical signs of heartache and
young love have since faded, they have been replaced by a culture ob-sessed with playing hard to get. The truth is, though, it’s over-rated; in fact, those of you who think ignoring phone calls, texts, Tweets and Facebook messages is endearing, think again. Playing hard to get is something small animals do, like your roommate’s puppy. And still, after chasing him around the room for a few minutes, even he knows when to give it up and let his belly be scratched. So give it up. We’re tired of chasing you across Colorado; un-dress and let’s do this. If you’re interested, that is. Though honestly, even if you aren’t, I’m probably still game. A few days ago, real-ity struck. It struck so hard I tripped over my shoes, knocked my elbow on my desk and howled loudly to Mother Nature for making me have to pee in the middle of the night. Sitting on the toi-let more than a few ugly curse words later, I had an epiphany, and as a friend told me earlier in the week, “It’s not about
trying to be hard to get, it’s about legitimately be-ing hard to get because you are so busy. If he is interested, he’ll have to try.” Because here’s the thing: you might be able to rationalize for hours that he likes you and that really he’s just confused or he’s afraid to be hurt or he doesn’t want to appear vulnerable, but at the end of the day, he’s probably just not that into you. Men are only as compli-cated as we make them. While they might not be upfront and tell you ex-actly how they feel, the way they treat you sure as hell will. If he texts you randomly, only calls you when he’s drunk and puts you through a number of tests to prove you like him, he is wasting your time. If he tells you he likes you, don’t get too excited. He probably didn’t mean it. And if he did, he proba-bly only meant it that day, because if he’s not trying to see you, and if he’s not taking time out of his day to make you feel special, his degree of liking is similar to how much you like doing laundry—not a
whole lot. If he isn’t slam-ming you against the wall in the library to kiss you, you probably don’t stand a chance. Because really, it’s not that hard; there’s no necessary preamble. This isn’t the orchestra. Move on, be happy and forget him. Life is not a waiting game. Life
is not for those addicted to cheap romance nov-els and life is not to be played with. Keep busy, fill your life, keep your friends close, pursue your dreams and, damn it, please stop putting up with his bullshit. The problem, of course, is that we rarely
like the guys who pursue us. Instead, we like the mystery guy, the one that seems unattainable and the one who needs to be “figured out.” But if you aren’t certain he’s really into you and if he hasn’t already ripped your shirt off in a heated pre-sex ritual, get the hell out.
opinionPage 14 September 28 to October 4
Jasen [email protected]
Jessica [email protected]
I like it on the bed, on the floor and on that old ancient desk in the corner
Required to make you a better person
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Earlier today, the Facil-ities Services department announced a new study in order to “Better track stu-dent herd migrations and provide greater guidance to future walkway plan-ning.” The study, which will involve tranquilizing and fitting some two hundred unsuspecting students with radio collars and identification tags, is set to begin on Oct. 1, coin-ciding with the beginning of deer season. When asked if the aligning dates were a co-incidence, Pavit Dover, head of the department, laughed in reply. “No-ticed that, didn’t you? Yeah, that was a great idea on my part, if I say so myself. Our department’s been hit by the budget cuts, same as everybody else, and I was worried that we wouldn’t be able to get the study done be-cause of staff limitations. But then my buddy over at the CDNR (Colorado Department of Natural Resources) mentions that their deer tag sales were way down this year be-cause of the recession. Ding! I put two and two together, posted some fly-ers asking for free volun-teers at a few of the hunt-
ing supply stores around town, and had five times the needed number of ap-plications within the first forty-eight hours.” When asked if fitting students with tracking equipment during regu-lar college hours will be disruptive to campus life, Dover assured that would not be the case. “The guys I got, they’re real profes-sionals. Most times you won’t even know they’re on campus. Several of ’em spent the last few weeks scoping out the campus, and they told me that the majority of the tricks they use on the deer and other animals will work just as well on the average col-lege student.” On a related note, Do-ver recommends that stu-
dents wishing to not par-ticipate in the study avoid seemingly unattended iPods, cases of beer or ra-men and gift cards to the UCCS bookstore during the first week of October. Dover went on to out-line the implementation of the study. In order to get the best results from the study, students chosen must have as little knowl-edge of the fact that they are being tracked as pos-sible. To facilitate this, the researchers intend to take most of their sub-jects from 8 a.m. and 4 p.m. classes, with a heavy emphasis on any class that includes watching a large number of slides or videos. “Most students won’t even realize they’ve been
tranqued. They’ll just feel like they’re nodding off like they always do. And that’s when the tag team will move in. Some of these guys are able to field strip a full-grown buck in less than five minutes. Slapping on a collar and an ear tag won’t be any problem for them.” Finally, when asked if he thinks the bulky metal radio collars or bright or-ange ear tags will be both-ersome to some students, Dover laughed once again. “Have you seen what those kids are wearing these days? We expect that bulky metal collars and bright orange ear-rings will be the height of fashion by the end of the month.”
Campus police are on alert after a bear sight-ing last week, said to be the first in this area since July. “This kind of encoun-ter is way out of season,” Officer Scott Combo said during an interview. “Since their migration starts in June and tapers off rapidly throughout July, we’re used to see-ing a few stragglers dur-ing the summer months. Students are usually too busy trying to fulfill their few social science requirements to be in any real danger. But to have one show up well into fall semester, it’s
just unheard of.” The bear was first seen near the Alpine Village apartments, strutting briskly toward the Recreation Center. It stopped for about 30 minutes there, to lift weights and watch the men’s swim team prac-tice. It was kicked out when Recreation Center staff noticed the pletho-ra of zippers donning its leather chaps; zippers are considered a hazard when working out. The bear then per-formed a choreographed dance-walk toward the parking garage, where it stopped by the Student Health Center for free condoms and lube. Cam-pus police were not near
the parking garage at the time, as they were all re-sponding to a call about a dead battery. The bear was able to evade cap-ture, then, and proceed-ed across campus. It stopped briefly at the MOSAIC office in order to pick up some pamphlets and young-er male students, but no such students were available. Campus of-ficials are calling it a close call. The bear was even-tually found rummaging through Theatreworks discarded clothing bin, where it was tranquil-ized. It was then tagged and released back into its natural habitat near Acacia Park.
Students are advised to be on the lookout for any other bears entering campus grounds. They are considered generally
cuddly but potentially dangerous, especially if you insult their leather ensemble. Students can easily identify a bear by
its excessive body hair, which will be exposed under its metal-studded harness and ass-less chaps.
theScribble“Still, if a statement cannot reasonably be interpreted to be one of express or implied fact, it cannot be libelous. This means that humor columns, spoofs, cartoons and satire are protected as long as readers understand that the material is not intended to be taken seriously.”
-Student Press Law Center
TOPTEN
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Pets to hide in your dorm room
Ferret: What’s not to love about a small, carnivorous mammal that can fit into con-fined and secretive spaces like in the fur-nace or under your roommate’s mattress?
Purse sized dog: These overgrown rodents can be kept in one of those magazine racks at the end of your coffee table, just ensure the RA that the reading material isn’t that great. Turtle: name it Franklin (for old time’s sake) and hide it in the shower when room inspections come around.
Rabbit: Just make sure another rabbit doesn’t come along or you won’t be able to hide this one.
Snake: Two weeks in and you can’t stand your roommate? Problem solved.
Dwarf hamster: Not only are they quiet, they have collapsible bones and that’s just interesting.
Mouse: You can teach them to do tricks…and that’s about it. If you get sick of it you can feed it to your roommates snake and enjoy the show. Those zoo animals you can take care of on Facebook: Need something you won’t really care about when it dies because you didn’t feed it or clean it in four days? Get one of these. Tamagachi: These furry virtual friends won’t judge you or make you feel bad. Okay, so they cry and a crying tamagachi is enough to make anyone cry.
Your younger sibling: At least they aren’t part of the rodent family.
-Catherine Jensen
Jasen [email protected]
Bear sighting on campus
Photo Courtesy of Wikimedia CommonsDid you know that “bear” is also a term for an older, hairy gay gentlemen? I bet this story makes a lot more sense now, huh?
UCCS to implement new “Bag and Tag” student migration studyAndrew [email protected]
Photo Courtesy of enchantedacrescamp.comPavit Dover’s team of expert hunters. This is the last time the group was photo-graphed, and it is suspected they have had their appearances altered.
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We ate at Uchenna today. Everything was delicious and fresh. We had lamb with chiles and ginger served on the Injera (the Ethiopian sourdough pancake). The house-made lemonade with rosewater and iced tea with orange flower water were good, too. The baklava was fresh and delicious. There’s also lasagna and spaghetti on the menu for culinary weenies.
-Renee O. at yelp.com
Come experience excellent Mediterranean dishes, as well as exquisite Ethiopian cuisine that boasts authentic recipes that
are 70% organic, gluten-free and allergy-friendly.
Rave Reviews
UCCS Students!
Very good quality Ethiopian food run by a warm and friendly proprietor. I am a big fan of Ethiopian food, having been to over 20 Ethiopian restaurants around the coun-try. Uchenna offers some unique spicing to dishes that I have not had before. I highly recommend it.
-Douglas R. at yelp.com
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