Section ii my letters

SSppaannddaannee –– TThhee LLaasstt LLeeccttuurree

SSeeccttiioonn IIII

MMyy LLeetttteerrss

MMrr.. SSuuddhhiirr VVaaiiddyyaa..

Spandane – The Last Lecture Section II – My Letters

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Spandane – The Last Lecture

Index Section II – My Letters

Sr.

No.

Letter addressed to Relation Letter dated Pages

00 Preface to Section II 3

01 Mrs. Sungandha R. Vaidya Wife of cousin brother 04-12-1996 1

02 Mr. Raghunath D. Vaidya Cousin brother 04-12-1996 1

03 Thanks to Well wishers Relatives & Friends 24-07-1997 1

04 Mr. Parab Friend 01-03-2000 1

05 Sachin, Anand, Raj, Revati Assistants 15-09-1999 2

06 Mr. Bhushan Kondurkar Friend 14-12-2001 1

07 Mr. Carvello Family Friend 03-02-2000 2

08 Deven Son 29-06-2004 5

09 Meena Assistant 16-07-2007 3

10 Deven & Devyani Son & Daughter 18-07-2009 4

11 Kirti Daughter-in-law 05-06-2007 4

12 Letter to DAD Dad 31-12-2009 1

13 Aayush Grand-son 10-06-2010 2

14 Bal dada Cousin brother 27-10-2010 3

15 Letter to God God 31-12-2010 2

16 Letter to Client 28-04-2011 3

39


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Spandane – The Last Lecture

Preface to Section II – My Letters I have already mentioned in the chapter ‘My Family’ that I do not intent to include elaborate

account of my Family Life in the Autobiography. Readers would get information about my

family members such as spouse, son, daughter-in-law, daughter, son-in-law etc. in various

letters included in Section II of this book and some of the Articles in Section I & III.

Letter writing is my favourite hobby/ topic since school days. Not because it was a scoring

topic but I really enjoyed it. During college, once again I enjoyed the topic titled

’Commercial Correspondence’.

Eventually I became a Chartered Accountant. I served in the Industry for 10 years and

ventured into Practice. I became the leading Insurance Surveyor. Thus I had the ample

opportunity to shoot out letters of different variety. However you may be surprised to note

that I had cultivated the habit of sending personal letters to friends, family members and

even to my spouse inspite of my busy schedule.

Letter writing is a powerful medium of expression of your thoughts. Now a days

communication is bit easy with SMS, email, internet chat etc. I must have sent hundreds of

personal letters and thousands of official letters in my Life.

I had developed official correspondence on various topics for ready reference during my

occupational career. I still remember one phrase included in one of the Recovery Letter

namely ‘our patience is wearing thin.’ It actually created a wave with our customers.

It was a tough time to select few letters for inclusion in the Autobiography. With a great

difficulty, I could lay hands on few letters which are though personal would enable readers to

get insight in to My Family Life, My ideologies, display of Managerial Skills in sorting family

problems, counselling skill etc. I have added the notes below most of the letters for better

understanding and insight of the contents.


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I have classified these letters in various categories for ready reference.

1) Medical Counselling:

This section includes letter written to my Vahini (cousin brother’s wife) suffering from cancer

and also to cousin brother. (Letter nos. 01 & 02)

2) Thanks Giving Letters:

This category includes letter sent one year after my deadly accident on 24-07-1996 to all those

who helped me to recover from the accident, both physically and mentally. (Letter no. 03)

It also includes speech delivered at the retirement ceremony of Mr. Parab working with my

client. (Letter no. 04)

The reply was sent to thank my Assistants for sending birthday greeting. (Letter no. 05)

3) Condolence letters:

This section includes letter sent to my friend on sad demise of his father. (Letter no. 06)

Another letter was sent to my friend on sad and untimely demise of his son. Amrish was a

brilliant boy with active habits. He was studying in 1st MBBS at the time of his death. His

death was shocking because the previous night he had attended a family function and slept.

Morning he was found dead. Moreover his sister was to get married just few days after his

death. Marriage function was still conducted as all arrangements were done and it was not

possible to postpone the marriage. (Letter nos. 07 )

It also includes a letter to my cousin on sad demise of my Kaku. (Letter no. 14)

4) Family Life:

This section includes letter sent to my son when he decided to stay separately in his newly

purchased flat. (Letter no. 08)

Another letter was written to Mrs. Meena Sawant (my assistant) to share my Family Life.

(Letter no. 09)


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5) Planning after my death:

Death is only the certainty in LIFE but as the departure time is not known, I have decided to

share my feelings with my son and daughter. (Letter no. 10)

6) Marriage Counselling:

This letter was written to would be daughter-in-law before marriage to appraise her about our

family and its philosophy. (Letter no. 11)

7) Dialogue with Dad:

One day I became sentimental & felt like having a dialogue with my Dad.

I had no alternative but to express my feelings in an open letter. (Letter no. 12)

8) Dialogue with Grand-son on his 1st birthday:

As a novel concept, I decided to write a letter to my grand-son on his 1st birth day. The idea of

writing autobiography has roots in this letter. (Letter no. 13)

9) Open Letter to God:

I became sentimental at the year end & felt like having a dialogue with God. I had no

alternative but to express my feelings in an open letter. (Letter no. 15)

10) Letter to Client informing about my retirement decision:

I took retirement from Professional career this month. I have shared my thoughts on

retirement with my client. (Letter no. 16)

Sudhir Vaidya

15-05-2011


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È È EaI È È

saaO. saugaMQaavaihnaIlaa sa. namaskar iva. iva.

maaJao p~ baGaUna tulaa na@kIca AaEcaya- vaaTola. kdaicat caTkna tU malaa AaoLKNaarsauwa naahIsa mhNaUna maIca tulaa p`qama

maaJaI AaoLK k$na dotao. maI igargaavaatIla maQaukakaMcaa QaakTa maulagaa sauQaIr va rGaudadacaa caulat Baa}.

tuJaI tbbaot barI nasato ASaI baatmaI eoklaI haotI. prMtu tuJyaa saQyaacyaa AajaaracaI baatmaI kLlyaanaMtr rGaudadalaa

lagaocaca p~ pazivalao. ³p`t jaaoDlaI Aaho ´. maI tulaa BaoTlyaalaa AMdajao 20 vaYao- JaalaI AsatIla. tU rGaudadabaraobar

igargaavaat AalaI haotIsa. maI tumacyaa lagnaalaa hjar haotao va AajahI tuJaa lagnaatIla p`sanna caohra malaa Aazvatoa. maaozyaa

saUnaovar laadlaolyaa AajaarpNaacaa maI AjaUna Aqa-ca laavaU Saklaolaao naahI. prMtu maaJaI Ka~I Aaho ik tU saMpUNa-pNao barI

haoNaar Aahosa. vaOVmaMDLIMnaI na@kIca evaZo puNyasaMcaya kolao Aaho.

maI va saaO. sauima~a nauktoca puNyaalaa ApGaatat saaapDlaao haotao. %yaatUna Aataca jara saavart Aaho. %yaamauLo p`%yaxa yaoNao

lagaoca Sa@ya naahI. ‘ Get well soon ’ kaD- saaobat pazivat Aaho. mana SaaMt zovaUna dovaacaI ]pasanaI kravaI. dova

na@kIca yaSa do[-la.

hoca p~I naanaa va saaO. kakUlaa iSa. saa. namaskar va EaIQar ¸ ivajaya ¸ EaIrMga ¸ saMjayalaa Namaskar. CaoTo maMDLIMnaa

AaiSa-vaa-d. saaO. vaihnyaaMnaa namaskar.

kLavao.

04 – 12 – 1996

Note: This letter was written to my Vahini (cousin brother’s wife) suffering from cancer.


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È È EaI È È

tI. rGaudadasa sa. namaskar iva. iva.

maaJao p~ baGaUna tulaa kdaicat AaEcaya- vaaTola. pNa tuJyaa saaO. caI tbbaot barI naahI Asao kLlyaavar malaa p`qama pk̀Yaa-nao

tuJaI Aazvat JaalaI va Aaplao lahanapNaacao idvasa va %yaa Special AazvaNaI *yaat mana bauDUna gaolao. AapNa p`%yaxa

igargaavaat BaoTlaao %yaalaaca maaJyaa AMdajaanao saumaaro 20 vaYao- JaalaI. prMtu maaJyaa manaat Aaplyaa naatosaMbaMQaacao smarNa naohmaIca

rahIlao. tovhZI AaplaI maanaisak javaLIk haotI va AajahI Aaho.

lahanapNaacao idvasa iktI Cana Asatat naahI Æ tUlaa Aazvato AapNa sava-imaLUna pacajaNa AaMgaòvaaDIt pìsaw haotao. laaok

Aaplyaalaa gamatInao paca paMDva mhNat. maI tr savaa-McaI naavao sauwa zovalaI haotI. tU tr maaoza Qama- haotasa tr maI sahdova.

tulaa AazvatM ka ik AapNa Table lamp cyaa ]jaooDat ra~I daoGao AByaasa krayacaao. tU S S C laa Asatanaa maI

tuJaa vahIbar hUkUma AByaasa Gaot Asao. tuJao sauroK Axar AajahI maaJyaa najarosamaao$na hlat naahI. EaIkaMtcyaa lagnaanaMtr

tu farsaa mauMba[-laa Aalaa naahIsa va AaplaI BaoT hao} SaklaI naahI prMtu tuJaI AazvaNa maI kQaIca ivasarlaao naahI.

saaO. saugaMQaacyaa AajaaracaI malaa klpnaaca navhtI. tIcaI tbbaot vaarMvaar barI nasato Asao kanaavar Aalao haoto. prMtu

tIcyaa saQyaacyaa AajaaracaI klpnaa yaotaca maaJao mana Ba$na Aalao.

malaa ek kLt naahI kI vaOV GaraNyaatIla laaokaMnaI Asao kaya pap kolao Aaho ik %yaacaI iSaxaa dova AajaarpNao do}na

vasaUla krt Aaho. Aaplyaa ipZItIla maaozyaa saunaovarIla AajaarpNaacaa maI Aqa-ca laavaU Sakt naahI.

isanaomaatIla AimataBa baccana saarKIca maaJaI Ka~I Aaho ik dova AjaUna trI Aaho va %yaamauLoca saaO. saugaMQaavaihnaIcyaa

tbbaotIlaa lavakrca ]tar pDola. AiQak kaya ilahU . maanavaI mana mhNajao pRqvaIcyaa paoTatIla paNyaacaa Jaraca. kQaI

AazvaNaI baahor yaotIla %yaacaa naoma naahI. mhNaUnaca ha p~p`pMca.

Aajaca saaO. vaihnaIlaa p~ pazivat Aaho. tbbaotIsa japavao va mana SaaMt zovaUna dovaacaI ]pasanaa kravaI. dova na@kIca yaSa

do[-la.

tuJaa pòmaL QaakTa Baa}.

04 – 12 – 1996

Note: This letter was written to cousin brother whose wife was suffering from cancer.


www.spandane.com

Dear ……. A year has rolled by ~~~~~

Monsoon has set in ~~~~

and Memories of July last flooded my mind, prompting me to express sincere

thanks once again for the help rendered by you after my accident.

Accident has made me wealthier not in terms of money but in terms of experience,

which enabled me to have fresh look at life and the Path, I should follow.

I do agree that we must forget the past and look at the future but a person like me

looks at the future from window of the past and doors of the present.

I will remember the trouble taken by you for years to come and such kind gesture

will strength the foundation of life in general.

LIFE today as I see is nothing but Loss of Individual Faith and Enemity arising

out of ego.

I pray to Almighty God that happiness, good health, prosperity and peace of mind

be showered on your family and all your wishes and desires be fulfilled forthwith.

With kind regards.

24-07-1997

Note: I met with a deadly accident on 24-07-1996 at Poona. This letter was sent

one year after the said accident to all those who helped me to recover from the

accident, both physically and mentally.

È È EaI È È

Aaja AapNa EaI prbasaahobaaMcyaa saovaa inavaR<aI inaraop samaarMBaasaazI ek~ Aalaao Aahaot. maaJaa va prbasaahobaaMcaa pircaya

tsaa farca qaaoDa. kovaL gaolyaa 7–8 vaYaaM-Mcaa. maI baaorIvalaI SaaKot AalyaanaMtr prbasaahobaaMjavaL 2 imanaITo trI

gaPpagaaoYTI kolyaaiSavaaya kQaIca kama sau$ krt nasao.

saovaa inavaR<aI mhNajao caakaorIbaw AayauYyaatIla saMQyaakaL AaiNa navaI sakaL KulaopNaacaI AayauYyaat rahUna gaolaolyaa

iktItrI gaaoYTI krNyaacaI hvyaa tovha ¸ hvyaa tSyaa. saovaa inavaR<aI mhNajao ba–yaaca jaNaaMsaazI naaokrItUna sauTka. prMtu

saMtaMcyaa mato saovaa inavaR<aI mhNajao saovaa krNyaasaazI inavaR<aI . inavaR<aIpya-Mt AapNa sava-jaNa Aaplyaa paoTasaazI kama krt

Asatao. prMtu inavaR<aInaMtr AapNa samaajaasaazI kahI kma- krNao ho Aaplao kt-vya Aaho Asao saMtaMnaI saaMigatlao Aaho. prMtu

prbasaahobaaMnaI pUvaI-cyaa naaokrItUna inavaR<aI GaotlyaanaMtr ba^MkocaI 15 vaYao- saovaa kolaI va %yaaca vaoLI to &atIcyaa saMsqaaMsaazI pNa

kaya-rt raihlao.

malaa prba saahobaaMcyaa $pat gaItotIla itsa–yaa AQyaayaatIla kma-yaaogaIca idsatao. kma- sagaLoca krtat pNa kmaa-t

Aaolaavaa hvaa ¸ Baavanaa hvaI. kma- ho naaoTop`maaNao Aaho. Baavanaocyaa iSa@yaalaa ikMmat Aaho. kmaa-cyaa kpTyaalaa naahI.

kma-yaaogyaacyaa kmaa-mauLo %yaacaI SarIryaa~a caalaUna doh va bauiw satoja rahtat va samaajaacao klyaaNa haoto. samaajaalaa AadSa-

laaBatao.

vayaacyaa pMcyaa<arIt sauwa ekaga`pNao kama kravayaacyaa %yaaMcyaa savayaIpasaUna AapNaa savaa-Mnaaca iSakNyaasaarKo Aaho.

Aajapya-Mt SaaKotIla %yaaMcyaa saar#yaa vaiDlaQaa–yaa maaNasaacaI ]pisqatI hI savaa-MsaazI AaEvaasak Asao. AgadI

kma-caa–yaaMpasaUna to baM̂kocao Katodar ¸ saBaasadaMpya-Mt. jyaa SaaMtpNao va na kMTaLta p`%yaok gaaoYT to samajaavaUna saaMgat to

Kroca vaaKNaNyaasaarKo Aaho.

prbasaahobaaMcyaa baaolaNyaat Aa%mastuit ikMvaa dusa–yaacaI inaMda kQaIca nasao. Aaplyaapoxaa vayaanao KUp lahana Asalaolyaa

sahka–yaat to sahjapNao imaLUna imasaLUna vaagat. %yaaMcaI iËkoTcaI AavaD tr savaa-Mnaa qa@kca krt Asao.

maI savaa-Mcyaa vatInao prbasaahobaaMnaa caaMgalao Aaraogya va mana:SaaMit laaBaao ASaI [-EvarcarNaI pàqa-naa krtao va %yaaMnaI vayaacaI

Century pUNa- kravaI va %yaaMcaa prt ekda sa%kar krNyaacaI saMQaI Aamha savaa-Mnaa imaLavaI ASaI [-cCa p`gaT krtao va

%yaaMnaI vaiDlakIcyaa naa%yaanao Aamha savaa-Mnaa ]pdoSaacao va AaiSa-vaadacao daona Sabd saaMgaavao ASaI %yaaMnaa ivanaMtI krtao.

Qanyavaad.

maaca- 2000

Note: I delivered this speech at the retirement ceremony of Mr. Parab working with my

client.


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Dear Sachin, Anand, Revati & Raj I acknowledge with thanks receipt of your Birthday Greeting Card today which

incidentally raised few issues in my mind & I intend to share the same with you.

Personally I do not think that I am entitled to get the compliments mentioned in the

Greeting Card. To my knowledge, I have not done anything extraordinary for you.

This is my style of behavior which you must have observed over the period.

Each one of us inherits good and bad qualities with birth and every one gives shape

to those qualities depending upon own nature and taste. It is more like selecting a

TV channel among the 100 Channels provided by cable operator. It is possible that

I might have provided one/two good channels for you to watch. It is likely that

from my talk about Profession, Life philosophy, Life experience, Human

psychology etc. you might have got few points to ponder and think further in that

direction.

Secondly, three year period is too short to mould anybody. Well, I do not wish to

doubt your sentiments about my contribution for your career development but

only wish to put forth my perspective/ point of view.

You are aware that I am trying to develop a detached attitude towards life in

general and I am afraid that your love & affection for me may act as a speed

breaker in my uphill journey on the said detached path.

At this juncture, I wish to share one secret with you. You will recall that our

association began in August 1996 soon after my accident when I was going through

the bad patch of Life. My will power, mental peace etc. was probably at its lowest.

At that point, it was my good fortune that I came in contact with young, sincere

and energetic persons like you which to a very large extent contributed towards my

recovery from the accident. I could tie over my personal problems and my mind


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jumped back with a desire to do something for you. I will always be grateful to you

all for the love and affection given to me during our association.

I wish you and your family happiness, prosperity, good health and peace of mind.

With regards.

15-05-1999 Note: The reply was sent to thank my Assistants for sending birthday greeting.. All the above assistants are now well settled in Life.


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14-12-2001. Dear Bhushan I was shocked when I heard the news of sad demise of your father. Your loss I can

realize some what as I know how empty my world seemed when I lost my father

when I was studying in college.

It will be hard for all of you to carry on without him but we are all helpless.

We have to accept this as God’s wish.

I am sure that you will realize that your father was indeed fortunate & lucky if you

refer ‘Bhagwat Gita’. Unless a person gets blessings of 4 Gods namely Fire (Agni

which represents work) Chandra (Moon which represents kind, good qualities of

mind) Surya (Sun which represents sharpening & use of knowledge) and Avakash

(Space which represents detached attitude), such peaceful exit from this world

/Life is not possible.

Please accept my sincere sympathy in your sorrow.

May his soul rest in peace.

Note: This letter was sent to my friend on sad demise of his father.

Spandane – The Last Lecture Section II – My Letters Dear Mr. Carvello & Family I was shocked when I heard the sad news of untimely demise of your younger son Amrish.

It is a loss not only to you & your family but also of society in general as he was pursing

Medical career.

LIFE is a game of uncertainty. In fact it is a Live Episode of Increase & Fall. Death of near

& dear one is always shocking but more so when death catches a young energetic &

talented person marching towards predetermined goal. But all of us are helpless. Every

thing happens with a will of GOD. Probably Amrish was too good to live in this world &

GOD has called him in his kingdom for bestowing more challenging job.

You must be aware of saying in ‘Bhagwat Gita’ that body is perishable & soul leaves the

body & enters another body. Soul does not die. Soul has a perpetual existence.

At this juncture, I take the liberty to suggest few ways to overcome your shock & sorrow.

i) Each one of you should brush up your memories of your association with

Amrish right from his birth and try to capture those memories in a register.

Attempt should be made to analyze his nature, ambitions, goals, qualities,

limitations, behaviour etc. Who knows you could end up writing a good article

which can find place in Reader’s Digest. (The Art of Living). This can be the

source of power for many to overcome the similar shock.

ii) You can donate suitable amount every year on his birthday to his school for

extending aid to poor & needy students.

I take this opportunity to congratulate you for your decision of not postponing marriage of

your daughter Anurupa. To take such as bold decision & to execute the same really needs

‘Lions Heart’ and your have proved that your mental capabilities are really of

extraordinary nature. You have displayed a true sprit of ‘Show must go on’

I pray to Almighty God to give courage to bear the loss. May his soul rest in peace. 03-02-2000


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Note: This letter was sent to my friend on sad and untimely demise of his son. Amrish was

a brilliant boy with active habits. He was studying in 1st MBBS at the time of his death. His

death was shocking because previous night he attended family function and slept.

Morning he was found dead. Moreover his sister was to get married just few days after his

death. Marriage function was still conducted as all arrangements were done and it was not

possible to postpone the marriage.


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Hi Deven

I am sure that you will be surprised to receive such a long letter and that too from me.

But just keep patience and read the letter peacefully. Here I just remember the famous

dialogue of your MOM. ‘Mazi Maau kaya karat asel?’ My answer in those days was ‘Tuzi

Maau radat asel’.

This was the story of 20 years back. Lot of water has flown below the bridge. Now Mazi

Maau has turned out to be handsome young man of active and all round interests and

constantly striving for perfection in the areas liked by him. ☺

At the outset please accept my sincere and wholehearted congratulations for promotion

& becoming the proud owner of FLAT in NL Complex.

Your decision of shifting alone to the new flat was slightly shocking. It was not expected

to happen so suddenly. But we are proud and honour your decision. Four aspects

namely education, service/occupation, residence and marriage play major role in our

life and our success in life depends to a large extent in taking timely decision in these

areas. You have already taken bold decision as regards service and residence. Beyond a

particular point in life, formal education always takes back seat and is hardly important

except to meet one’s ego.

Our relationship is now attending new dimensions. I conveniently presume that your

decision of shifting is not the outcome of your grudge against me. I do agree that we have

confronted enough in our day-to-day life but that is mainly because of my disciplined

personality. In fact I decided to write this letter because I felt that it is my duty to share

my life as now you have grown enough to not only understand but also to digest the hard

facts. In fact last few years I was planning to send such letter but was not getting suitable

opportunity. I feel that now such opportunity has come and I should grab the same.

It was nice on your part that you were never inquisitive about my marriage with your

MOM. Of course when we married, you were hardly 7 years old but even after wards also


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you simply never bothered to unearth the underlying currents responsible for such an

exceptional marriage.

I learned a hard lesson in my childhood that you do not get any thing free in life. You

have to pay the cost in this Life itself. I lost my DAD when I was studying in Jr. B.Com

with whom I was very much attached.

Then I decided to compartmentalize my Life and fully concentrated on my studies with

an aim that I should build my educational career so high, so that people will envy me.

Then I took up the job and literally threw myself in the occupational career. I continued

my education even when I was seriously discharging my job responsibilities. In spite of

high job position as Financial Controller, I was lonely in my heart.

One day I decided to commit suicide. I selected the day. It was Saturday –our off day.

I completed all pending jobs at office so that my employer will not face immediate

problems. I sat very late in my cabin the previous day. My friend and good colleague

Mr. Kantak was also giving me company. We talked a lot on varied subjects. He felt some

unusualness in my talk. He took a promise that I will be cancelling my decision. He

invited me for Dinner on next day evening (my target day for suicide). We drank good

amount of beer followed by non-Veg food. Suicide programme was obviously cancelled.

☺

Now let me tell you the story of my love marriage. I got married with Mrs. Sumitra on

11-05-1984. Marriage was the third priority on my list. My father had kept the Borivali

flat for me. First was obviously education, followed by career. By 1983, I achieved both.

I had completed my education and was serving as Financial Controller of Public Ltd

company (Indo Japanese project) Early 1983, I happened to meet your Mom. I found her

very active, energetic, optimistic about life, eager to learn new things etc. Our

acquaintance grew gradually. In 1983 I was also thinking of getting married and to settle

in life because my next target was to leave job and start independent practice. Then

I thought as to why not marry with your Mom? I was confident that my family will

support my decision. However I decided to wait for few months. I discussed the matter


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with my very close friends Jayant & Satish. Both of them supported me. I then proposed

your Mom. We had series of meetings to discuss the marriage issue from various angles.

Your Mom was serving and was staying with her mother-in-law. Her mother and others,

were not in favor of our marriage. After discussion with her and her mother –in-law,

we finally decided in September 1983 to get married in May 1984. School admissions were

done; flat was furnished, as it was only bachelor’s quarters. I did my level best to get

friendly with you & Devyani. In other words all the necessary spadework was done to

ensure the success. We had blessings of my mother and my other family members. Your

Mom’s relatives were not optimistic about our marriage. We were fortunate to get

‘blessings’ from Damle Aaji that our marriage will not last even for few days. Our

marriage was a topic of fun for them.

Nevertheless our marriage survived due to strong foundation of our love and courage to

face the society in midst of pessimistic atmosphere. In fact we had not done anything

wrong and hence never bothered about the society. The same society finally accepted that

such marriage could also be successful. You got the necessary protection of Father and

I got your love & affection. You are aware that all of us faced tough time to reconcile

with each other after our unusual marriage.

You may be remembering me as strict father. But try to understand that I had undertaken

a Herculean task of upbringing of two kids. If I had failed in my duties, the world at

large would have blamed me for this, as I was only a stepfather. Believe me that I always

had love and best wishes for your success in life. Probably my approach was rather

harsh but like you I was facing tough part of my life. Moreover I was more disciplined as

compared to normal person probably due to tough life I faced since childhood. My DAD

had diabetes for 35 years. He expired at the age of 58. Ever since I was in school, one

thought was always haunting all of us as to how many more years we will be getting

company of our father. Our childhood was covered with the tension of his likely untimely

death. This prompted me to become little pessimistic and conservative. Money was

always secondary for me. Our Family condition also taught me a lesson that you may not

get what you want and hence you must love what you get.


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I also planned my retirement way back in 1975 when I took my first assignment with

Crompton Greaves Ltd, that by 2001 onwards I should be doing something else or

additionally with my profession. With this retirement target in mind, I set saving target

and kept expenditure under control. Though I achieved financial target decided, the same

was not sufficient in view of reduced interest rates. When I decided the target in 1975,

interest rates on deposits were as high as 15 %. I thought that the same trend may not

continue but nevertheless the rates won’t fall below 10 %. But to every body’s surprise,

interest rates reached all time low as 5-6 %.

In view of this development I had to postpone my plan of seeking full time retirement

and decided to seek part time retirement and devote rest of the time for some good cause.

With that in mind, I learned alternate medicine in 1998 and since then trying my level

best to offer health management guidance to senior citizens in the society.

I am sure that such a long letter must be trying your patience. Let me touch two more

points. Please do not take tension of EMI to be paid over next 20 years. This is the good

opportunity for you to study and practice financial discipline. Your decision of staying

alone will enable you to master self-discipline.

Having chosen new managerial job and taken a bold decision of purchasing a flat,

I earnestly request you to consider the fourth important aspect of life. i.e. Marriage. Give

a serious thought. I am always here to stand behind you in your decision and whatever

help I can offer in the matter.

It is not out of place that you undertake SWOT Analysis of yourself. You have number of

points in support of your Strength such as deep involvement in the job of your interest,

lot of energy, varied interests in sports (mainly outdoor games). But you have been also

bestowed with few Weaknesses. Let me touch on few of them. I am sure that you are well

aware of these. To cite few weaknesses such as short temper, introvert personality, lack

of freeness in relationship with parents, afraid of communication with strangers, near

absence of empathy for others, conservative thoughts for ladies etc. One has to constantly

study his own SWOT and take corrective steps to become successful as a human being.


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5

Well, I hope that such a long letter will enable you to understand my personality and

my habit of looking at every thing from the brain (mind) and then subsequently from

the heart.

I take this opportunity to wish a grand success in life. I also wish best of luck in all

your future endeavors.

Good Bye, With Love.

Your Dad???!!!

29-06-2004

PS: Please delete the letter after reading it peacefully. Do not forward to any one. I will be

highly grateful if you confirm that you have read the letter and forgiven me for harsh

behavior with you. I once again assure you that my heart is still full of love for you.

=================================================================

Note: This letter was sent to my son when he decided to stay separately in his newly

purchased flat.

=================================================================


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6


www.spandane.com

Hi Meena

I am sure that you will be surprised to receive my long letter but just keep the patience and

read it carefully.

At the outset let me share one good news with you. My son Deven got married on 20-06-2007

with Kirti (my daughter-in-law) I feel that last responsibility of my life has been completed.

Before I tell you the story of his love marriage, it is necessary to share story of my love

marriage. I am sure that at this juncture you are bound to get surprised. I know you since

1992.We had discussion about family, my son etc. but it was just at superficial level.

In fact practically very few people know about it. Of course Mr. Jorapur knows about it.

Now let me tell you the story of my love marriage. I got married with Mrs. Sumitra on

11-05-1984. Marriage was the third priority on my list. My father had kept the Borivali flat for

me. First was obviously education, followed by career. By 1983, I achieved both. I had

completed my education and was serving as Financial Controller of Public Ltd company

(Indo Japanese project) Early 1983 I happened to meet Sumitra (Her name those days was

Smita) I found her very active, energetic, optimistic about life, eager to learn new things etc.

Our acquaintance grew gradually. She was widow with 2 kids. (Daughter age 10 year & son

7 years) (Her husband had expired in 1976 just before her son was born. His son entered the

world after the sad demise of his father due to acute kidney failure.) In 1983 I was also

thinking of getting married and to settle in life because my next target was to leave job and

start independent practice. Then I thought as to why I should not marry Smita? I was

confident that my family will support my decision. However I decided to wait for few months.

I discussed the matter with my very close friends Jayant & Satish. Both of them supported me.

I then proposed Smita. We had series of meetings to discuss the marriage issue from various

angles. Smita was serving and was staying with her mother-in-law. Her mother and others

were not in favor of our marriage. After discussion with her and her mother–in-law, we finally

decided in September 1983 to get married in May 1984. School admissions were done; flat was

furnished, as it was only bachelor’s quarters. I did my level best to get friendly with kids. In

other words all the necessary spadework was done to ensure the success. We had blessings of


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2

my mother and my other family members. Sumitra’s relatives were not optimistic about our

marriage. Nevertheless our marriage survived due to strong foundation of our love and

courage to face the society in midst of pessimistic atmosphere. In fact we had not done

anything wrong and hence never bothered about the society. The same society finally accepted

that such marriage could also be successful. Kids got the necessary protection of Father and

I got their love& affection. However all of us faced tough time to reconcile with each other

after our unusual marriage.

Sumitra lost her job soon after marriage. She helped me thereafter in my practice for few years.

Devayani my daughter also did love marriage in 2001 with Parsee Software engineer and went

to USA. She came back to India in 2003 and is staying at Thakur Village. She has two sons.

(4years and 9 months)

You were aware that I was on the lookout for suitable match for my son since early 2006. Some

how we could not get suitable match in spite of vigorous efforts by giving advertisement in

magazine, newspaper. Finally Deven disclosed his love story in last week of May 2007.

The real story is that ‘history’ has repeated. He decided to marry a divorcee with son

(age 7 years) Deven was of the same age in our marriage. We met Kirti and her family. We had

elaborate discussion about their love story; to what extent they know each other etc. I must say

that I am fortunate to get Kirti as my daughter-in-law. Like my wife, she has also undergone

rough days in her life. This experience has made her more mature than other girls of same age.

Kirti had read my book ‘Spanadane’ and hence she was confident that we would accept her as

our daughter-in-law. Considering the onset of monsoon, we performed marriage function on

20-06-2007 at Dahisar in my son’s flat in the presence of 15 close relatives and friends.

Marriage reception was held on 29-06-2007. We invited very close relatives and deven’s

colleagues and friends. Both of them are now staying at Dahisar. They do spend one-two days

in a week with us. Kirti is serving in Jet Airways as Secretary to Chairman and VP of his

secretarial office. Her parents are staying at Palghar.

You can telephone Kirti and my son and congratulate them if you wish or send Email by

introducing yourself as my student.


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3

None of clients know about my family life. Kindly do not disclose the same to anyone. In fact

I decided to share this with you as I got right opportunity to do so. Moreover when I met Kirti

for the first time, I remembered you because like you Kirti’s personality is also a mixture of

conventional and modern outlook. Her outspokenness, polite attitude, maturity of thoughts,

and courage to face the world appealed me most. You also happen to possess similar qualities.

I hope that you are not bored with my story.

Kindly delete the letter and do not forward it to anyone. Kindly confirm that you have read

the letter and duly deleted.

With kind regards.

Bye.

Sudhir Vaidya

16-07-2007

=====================================================================

Note: This letter was written to Mrs. Meena Sawant (my assistant) to share my Family Life.

Meena was my assistant. She completed CA, ICWA and is now working as Top level

executive in a Foreign Bank. Her husband is also my friend.

=====================================================================


www.spandane.com

Personal & confidential

Dear Devyani & Deven 18-07-2009

Re: Distribution of wealth after my death.

You are aware that I have cancelled my will dated 21-10-2004 due to number of practical

difficulties in executing the will apart from huge cost of execution (Rs.3 Lacs) and period

of 2 years required for execution of will.

However I have made the List of beneficiaries to whom my property should be distributed

after my death and hence I am sending this letter to share with you the necessary

information to do the needful.

Kindly preserve this letter in your investment folder. You need not show this personal

letter to your spouse.

Investment details are also available with Mrs. Sumitra.

In fact my beloved wife Mrs. Sumitra would get major portion of the wealth on my death

apart from both of you but I expect both you to help her in necessary distribution of

wealth as per my wish.

You may be amazed with low (!!!!) accumulation of my wealth ☺ and hence I wish to say

few words.

I have not inherited any financial investment from my father except Borivali Flat. I started

my occupational career in 1975 with a salary of Rs.1200/-pm. (Highest in the industry for a

fresh rank holder CA). My outgo on society charges was Rs.120/-pm. (10%) I paid Income

Tax @ 45% + surcharge on my salary for number of years. Maximum investment allowed

for IT deduction was 30 % of salary. I also spent about Rs.75,000/- on my hobbies such as

hosting my website, medical education, learning astrology, learning Reiki etc., purchasing

books on medical and astrology. I also spent handsome amount on donations, charity. 25%

of the compensation (received due to accident on 24-07-1996) was donated while Advocate

pocketed another 25%.


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2

I switched over to CA practice wef 01-06-1985. Along with my practice I acted as paper

examiner, paper setter for professional bodies like ICAI, ICWA, ICSI, IIB, and IBPS for

over 15 years as a social service measure. I also acted as Insurance Surveyor for 15 years

and passed claims of over Rs.100 Lacs. I was also guest faculty to BOI staff training college,

Apna Bank and Maratha Sahakari Bank for number of years. My professional fees did not

increase in line with salary hike in the Industry & inflation.

I married on 11-05-1984 and undertook your responsibility. Mrs. Sumitra lost her job soon

after our marriage in November 1984 as her company was shifted to Bangalore. I was not

aware of this fact before our marriage.

I am proud to say that I did not take any undue advantage of my above positions to earn

extra fringe benefit and in fact this was the point of dispute with my eldest brother who

was in habit of ridiculing me for not resorting to unfair means to earn more income.

Finally I broke the relations with him in 1991. However I am happy and proud that

I carried my practice and other assignments in real ‘professional’ way and not carried as

‘business’ way as is the fashion of the day. In my opinion, success should not be

measured by what you have achieved but what you had to leave / compromise to

achieve the same. I made it a point to achieve overall proportionate success on various

fronts such as financial, occupation, family, friends, hobbies, relaxation etc. and

maintaining good health till date. You may not be aware that Vaidya family has a curse of

high BP and diabetes from fairly young age. Touch wood that I am the exception till date.

I could not purchase Bigger Flat because those days proportion of agreement value and

cash element was 60:40. Obviously I never had cash element of 40 % and 20 % of

agreement value. HDFC was the only institution giving housing loan and that too was

restricted to 80 % of agreement value. EMI for 20 years was Rs.120 for Rs.10,000/- of loan

as against present EMI of approx. Rs.80/-per Rs.10,000 /-. Nationalized banks were not

giving housing loans. EMI would have accounted for 50-60 % of my salary.


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3

Now let me share my expectations with you.

i) Religious rituals should not be performed after my death either at the time

of funeral or at residence. My body should be burnt straight off.

ii) You will have to inform all professional bodies such as ICAI, ICSI, and BCAS

etc. about my death.

iii) Do not renew my website www.spandane.com. (Domain name renewal is due

on 1st March every year.)

iv) You will have to cancel my credit cards, ATM Cards etc.

v) Flat, electricity meter, PNG meter etc. should be transferred.

vi) Flats should be transferred to Mrs. Sumitra. However in case she predeceases

me then I will be making Deven as nominee for both flats. Under such

circumstances I expect that Deven should not sell the Flats unless absolutely

necessary. However legally he will get the right to sale on transfer of flat in

his name by the society.

vii) Deven should allow Devyani to visit the flat in case she needs change.

viii) You will have to refer list of beneficiaries for distribution of Gold, Silver etc.

between you in case Mrs. Sumitra predeceases me.

ix) You will have to refer list of beneficiaries for distribution of household

articles, furniture etc. between you in case Mrs. Sumitra predeceases me.

x) Kindly take back up of my data on the computer before formatting the hard

disk. You will observe that lot of useful data has been created, downloaded.

xi) Kindly help each other in case of difficulty.

xii) Kindly forgive me for my unusual behaviour which was specifically

developed to overcome my plight rarely faced by any one. I am aware about

my harshness with both of you was due to my moral responsibility. I always

resorted to ‘Shreya’ behaviour (i.e. what is good for the person) and not

‘Preya’ behaviour (i.e. what is liked by the person) in Life. The same approach

was followed in my occupational & Professional career. I have admitted to

Mrs. Sumitra that both of you have excellent qualities not possessed by

generation of your age.


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4

xiii) Lastly I assure you that I will not be burden on you financially and

otherwise even if Sumitra predeceases me.

Convey my regards to Kirti, Romin and love to Aryan, Neil, Kush and Aayush.

Good day!!!!

Baba

(Sudhir Vaidya)

18-07-2009

PS:

Kindly acknowledge the receipt and confirm that you have read the letter.

You are free to seek any clarification on reading the letter.

In fact I will show you the above investment folder on your next visit in case you are

interested.

Death is only the certainty in LIFE but as the departure time is not known, I decided to

share my feelings.


www.spandane.com

Hi Kirti

How are you? I am sure that you will be surprised to receive such a long letter. But just

keep patience and read the letter peacefully.

Our acquaintance is now just few days old. We met you for the first time on 24-05-2007.

Deven narrated your family background and about your personality, qualities etc. on

21-05-2007. We immediately accorded our approval to his choice without even meeting

you as we were confident about his choice. There after we met your parents on 27-05-2007

without wasting further time. Till date we have almost finished the shopping and other

necessary arrangements for your marriage with my son.

In cricket terminology it can be said that first 15 Overs have been bowled. According to

your famous dialogue, Trailer is now almost over and the main movie is about to start.

Now time will tell as to whether the main movie was as interesting as trailer?

Hence at this point I have decided to share few of my views, thoughts etc. for your

perusal.

At the outset we formally welcome you & ‘Kush’ to our family and hope that your entry

will further strengthen our family ties. You had the advantage of knowing me a bit

through my book ‘Spandane’ before we formally met on 24-05-2007. It is quite likely that

you might not have expected our fast response. You will appreciate that although you had

friendship with Deepak for few years, you were unable to take decision after he proposed

you. After meeting you, our confidence in Deven’s choice was automatically confirmed.

We definitely liked your personality, manners, outlook towards LIFE, your decision

making power etc. We always like people who overcome their difficulties and face the life

realities with a smiling face.

So far so good. Now our informal relationship will be formalized on your marriage with

my son on 22-06-2007. New name will be assigned to our relationship namely daughter- in-

law and father- in- law/ mother-in-law.


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2

Kindly let me know as to how I should call you? Shall I call you as ‘Kirti’ or ‘Sunbai’

Choice is yours? Let me share one secret that we have already accepted you as our

daughter and you will get the same love and blessing which we offered to our son and

daughter.

I am confident that your relationship with me and my wife will be fine and I don’t see any

difficulty. But one never knows. ??? After all Conflict is a part of LIFE and every one

should gear up to face the same. Well Kirti, do not get frightened with this remark. This

letter itself is the outcome of my deep thinking habit about human mind.

You will appreciate that during our initial meetings, I talked quite frankly about myself,

my wife and my son. The main purpose behind doing this was to make you tension free.

I was of the opinion that our family inputs will help you to quickly gain ground after your

entry in our family. I have the experience of counseling number of patients about their

behaviour with their daughter-in-law. However there is always the difference between net

practice and playing a formal game.

Now let me touch upon Conflict Management. I have already said earlier that conflict is

part of our LIFE. We may not be fortunate to avoid all conflicts but we can certainly try to

manage them well in time. Understanding reasons of conflict & acceptance of conflict etc.

are most essential for its management.

We must first understand the main reasons for conflict.

i) Unmet needs and wants.

ii) Values. Our values drive our behavior. Our values may differ about time, work,

health, relationship, spending habits etc.

iii) Perceptions. There are always three sides to any matter/ problem.

iv) Knowledge. The information or knowledge given or not given may cause

conflict.

v) Assumptions. We make assumptions on what we know. Conflict may take place

when assumptions are not checked for accuracy or are not updated periodically.

vi) Expectations. Conflict may occur when we do not know each other’s

expectations. Expectations should be made known in clear terms to each other.


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3

vii) Growing up differently. Each generation views life and work differently.

viii) Willing ness and ability to deal with conflicts.

ix) Three personalities are hidden in every individual, namely Parent, Adult and

Child. These personalities keep changing from time to time and from situation

to situation. When two persons happen to be in similar personalities say adult

while dealing then the chances of conflict are remote.

Now let me share with you some of our perceptions, views about life.

i) You may not get what you want in life but you can certainly love what you get

in life.

ii) We do not carry any complex either inferior or superior.

iii) You should ‘mean’ what you say but you may not ‘say’ what you mean unless

called for.

iv) We believe in individuality.

v) We honour every person’s ideas and skills.

vi) We always try to do what is right.

vii) We constantly exchange information and knowledge and keep optimum

amount of transparency in our dealings.

viii) We constantly look for every opportunity to learn.

ix) I look at every thing first from brain and subsequently from heart.

x) We consider saving as first charge on income.

xi) We don’t ignore signals. (Take macro meaning)

xii) Happiness lies in MIND.

xiii) We constantly practice that our mind should rule our body and intelligence

should rule our mind.

xiv) We try to break outdated barriers in life.

xv) We exercise control over ‘Hurry’ ‘Worry’ and ‘Curry’

xvi) We take pride in doing household chores.

xvii) We try to do Right thing at a Right time and in Right proportion.

xviii) We do retrospection at periodic intervals.

xix) We try to balance cost and benefits in every matter.

xx) We believe that we owe some obligations to society. We have already given

donation of Rs.5000/- after the said marriage was fixed.

xxi) We either don’t carry EGO or we try to keep the EGO under control.


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4

xxii) We always do PLANNING before taking any action, decision etc. (Take macro

meaning)

Well Kirti, I have tried to outline few of the views for your ready reference and I am sure

that you will try and recapitulate them in your dealing with us. No doubt that you could

have gathered this information over a long period of time. But I earnestly felt that it is

always better to take lead in expressing oneself when such an important relationship is

about to commence.

I have made few observations about your perspective and definitely would like to give my

suggestions on few issues whenever we meet in person.

Before I close the letter let me make one more request. When ever you happen to

disagree with us, please feel free to discuss the issue directly and politely with us

without any reservation and without involving third party. You have already started

calling us ‘BABA’ and ‘Aai’ hence you must also try and consider our advice in the same

capacity.

We are sure that your marriage with our son will be highly successful. Our blessing and

support will be always with both of you.

We take this opportunity to wish a grand success in life. We also wish best of luck in all

your future endeavors. We also wish that Deven-Kirti marriage will be as successful as

ours and would set an example in the society.

I am sure that you will take this letter /advice in right perspective & in true spirit. Good

Bye. With Lots of Love & Blessing.

BABA & Aai.

05-06-2007/08.50 AM

PS: Please delete the letter after reading it peacefully. Do not download & do not

forward to any one. I will be highly grateful if you confirm that you have read the

letter.

Note: This letter was written to would be daughter-in-law before marriage to appraise

her about our family and its philosophy. Marriage took place on 20-06-2007.


www.spandane.com

Dear Dad

I am sending this open letter since I don’t know your exact address ever since you left this

world way back when I was very young studying in a college.

I am writing this letter specifically to thank you for the few GIFTS given by you.

First Gift was of the good qualities such as sincerity, honesty, involvement, dedication, high

moral values etc. I have not only preserved these qualities against all odds but sharpened them

further.

Second Gift was of providing accommodation. Initially I tried to purchase new flat but

considering the economic situation that time, I left the thought of purchasing the new flat.

I decided to stay in the flat given by you and enjoyed my stay with wife & kids. Instead

I purchased a second home in Gujarat.

I knew about your third Gift but did not open it. However over the years the wrapper was

damaged and I had no alternative but to accept it as a part of my fate. In a way it is good.

At least ‘Count down’ has begun. Well I am not blaming you for this Gift but I personally feel

that no body would like to receive such a Gift. I tried my level best to reject this Gift but was

helpless and today I am accepting it under protest. For recording any victory, you need efforts,

desire (ability & willingness) but ultimately the ‘Luck factor’ has the final say in the matter.

Any way, I take this as one more opportunity to fight against all odds. (Although I am tired of

fighting)

What else? How are you?

Relationship means to HELP without HESITATION, to GIVE without EXPECTATION,

to LOVE without LIMITATION & to REMEMBER even without COMMUNICATION.

You may not believe but I have saved all your memories in my mind. Your Life Philosophy still

inspires & offers solution to me in case of need.

Take care. Bye!!!

31-12-2009


www.spandane.com


www.spandane.com

“Shree”

Chi. Aayush la aneka ashirwad. Happy Birthday. Many Happy returns of the day. Mottha Ho!!!

Today is your 1st birthday and I doubt as to whether any Aajoba might have thought of writing a

letter to his grandson on 1st birthday. I have told your Papa to preserve all these letters and hand

it over to you when you become ‘BIG’.

You may not aware that few months prior to your birth; we were in tension. But your birth

provided the great sigh of relief to all of us. My birth way back in 1951 had created tensions in

my family but our tension got vanished after your birth.

Aayush, you are indeed lucky to get Deepak as your Dad. You would get every opportunity in

LIFE to prosper. I am sure that under the able guidance from your Dad, you would complete

higher education but please remember that you should also become a ‘good citizen of the

country’ in the process.

Today I am happy for one more reason that I had completed the draft of my new book on M I S.

(12th book). I had set the target of completing the same by your 1st birthday and I have achieved

it. In a way I have been playing childhood game of ‘Tikkar –Billa’ (Toss a coin and get it - Setting

targets in all spheres of Life and achieving it) all through my life. I have virtually become the

‘Human Robot’ in the process.

By the time you read & understand my 1st letter, I may not be around and it is quite likely that

you ‘may’ be interested in knowing me as a ‘person.’ Hence I have decided to write my

‘Last Lecture’ which would enable you to understand me and my ‘generation’. It is an attempt to

bridge the ‘generation gap’. You may also get the glimpse of me in my website

www.spandane.com.

Instead of giving cash present to you on the occasion of your 1st birthday, I donated Rs.2,500/- to

one of the Educational Trust and prayed to GOD for your well being.


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2

You may be surprised that I have taken 375 photographs of you and recorded 71 videos in last

one year. All your snaps and videos have been saved in my computer and I am sure that you

may also be interested to see your childhood photographs when you grow up. I have created this

treasure for you.

God bless you.

Aajoba !!!!!????

10-06-2010


www.spandane.com

Dear Bal dada

The news about sad demise of your Mother was given to me by Suresh on 25th, when I was out

of station. I lost my mother 6 years back. (26-10-2004) The news about sudden death of

Sulochana Kaku was indeed shocking. No doubt that she was not keeping good health for last

few years but your loss I can realize some what, as I know how empty my world seemed

when I lost my mother.

We literally become orphan on loosing our Mother and that loss can never gets compensated

in Life. It will be hard for all of you to carry on without her but we are all helpless. We have to

accept this as God’s wish. Please accept our sincere sympathy in your sorrow.

I can understand & visualize the trouble taken by your family during last few years of her

poor health. Death is always uncertain. When, How and under what circumstances death will

come depends on the fate of that person. Family members are duty bound to render service to

such senior member of the family.

I must praise Mrs. Vahini for taking care of Kaku. To stay peacefully with Mother –in-law for

38 years is not a joke. This should act as an illustration to the young couples. I salute her for

her service. Last few years, she was acting in dual capacity as daughter-in-law and mother-in-

law. I am sure that God would definitely reward for her untiring service. I would run short of

words of praise for her efforts. She has done a commendable job. Hats off to her.

Your daughter-in-law also needs to be complimented as she also played the due role.

My mind was filled with memories of Kaku on getting the sad news about her demise.

1st memory was of the year 1958. My father was admitted to Talegaon Hospital for treatment.

All of us were staying at Poona. We were nine children in the house. Kaku took my personal

care in particular as I was youngest and my mother was also at Talegaon with my father.

She organised thread ceremony of Suresh and Shridhar at Poona. The function was well

organized and I still remember the same.


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2

Our generation should learn her sense of family responsibility. She personally attended

Shrikant’s marriage in June 1972 inspite of her ill health. She had an asthma attack but she

came to Mumbai with her bagful of medicines to give moral support to my mother.

She has seen number of ups and downs in Life. Due to collapsing of Pashed Dam, Poona

experienced massive Flood. Entire house was flooded. She took care of the family and Kaka.

Once again like a ‘Phoenix bird’, she rose to the occasion. Gave moral support to Kaka and

re-established her ‘Sansar’. Hats off to her. She swallowed the bitter events in Life such sad

demise of her daughter after delivery.

You are aware that I used to visit Poona every year for my official work from 1984. I have

invariably met her for chat. I met her for the last time in July 1996 when I met with an

accident.

Previous day of my return to Mumbai, Myself and Kaku were sitting on a compound wall of

the bungalow. Mrs. Tai and Mrs. Vahini also joined us after some time. Cool breeze was

flowing. The waves in the adjoining river were making soothing noise. I have frozen those

moments in my mind.

Kaku was practically illiterate and hence personal chit chat of family matters was her

favourite time pass. However over the years, it becomes difficult for the near family members

to spend so much time due to preoccupation and the old person rarely understands/digests

the situation. She could not contribute to house hold day to day chores and feeling that she

has been confined to bed troubled her more than her physical problems.

She enjoyed the company of Guests and took personal interest to entertain them.

I have witnessed her mental frame when Ravindra purchased a plot for constructing a

separate bungalow for his family. At the time when a trend of son shifting to a separate flat

after marriage was getting established, her expectation of two brothers should stay together

suggest about her concern and love.

I must admit that you and Vahini are literally following the foot steps of Kaku in entertaining

the guests and looking after family responsibilities. I still remember the trouble taken by you

and vahini after our accident on 24-07-1996. Both of you took our care whole heartedly.


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3

I remember your weekly visits to Mumbai in July /August 1969 for giving moral support to

us when dada’s health was deteriorating fast.

You are my ‘Role Model’ since childhood. I am also trying to imitate you but my ways may

be different.

Memory is like a scent bottle. When it gets opened, you can’t control the same and hence the

letter became lengthy. I hope that you will excuse me for this.

Convey my regards to Vahini. I once again salute her. Best wishes to Harshad and your

daughter-in-law. Lots of love to your grand daughter Anandi.

Take care of your health and look after the family. I am sure that God will give you strength

to bear the loss.

I wish to assure you that even if we have not met for last few years but still I carry the golden

moments spent in your company in my Mind.

Rest is fine.

Bye for now.

Your brother

Sudhir

27-10-2010

Note: This letter was sent to my cousin after sad demise of his mother (my Kaku) on

25-10-2010.


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Open Letter to GOD

Dear God,

Death is only the certainty in LIFE but as the departure time is not known, I have decided to

share my feelings and expectations with you now before it is too late.

At the outset, I express my sincere thanks for the ‘typical birth’ given to me and enabled me

to learn the hard realities of Life. I accepted your verdict as your blessings. I worshiped you

wholeheartedly. I also fought with you at times but still finally accepted your ‘verdict’ and

expected that now it is your turn to give me mental strength to fight out the situation and to

give me success on the track chosen by me for survival.

You are aware that once I was in a hurry to meet you but eleventh hour, you made me to

change my plans. I must admit that as usual your decision was correct because best of my Life

really came after that incident. ☺ I was in a hurry to Leave but my wife taught me as to how

to Live. Thanks for giving me such a spouse.

I have always advocated the principle that every one should do his ‘Swa –dharma’ or his

‘Karma’ sincerely and honestly and the God will respond with fruits, which should be

offered to him to express our gratitude. The moment you expect something from God means

you don’t have it. I have a strong belief that God knows what is best for you. He does not

offer anything just because you requested him. At the same time, he offers something to you

even if not specifically requested.

Now, let me turn to some of my expectations from you. ~~~~~~

1) Why don’t you call me immediately to your kingdom to offer my Professional services? ☺

Just think seriously on my expectations. I have nothing more to achieve in this Life. I have

achieved my little dreams and few more years may not help in real sense. However as long as

I am physically and mentally active, I will devote my time and energy for some constructive

work for the benefit of the society.

2) If it is not possible to call me immediately, then you call me ahead of my spouse. You are


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aware that she is my ‘best friend’ and it will be hard for me to continue the Life journey

without her. I am fully aware of the secret energy given to me to fight out with any situation.

But let me confess that I am tired of fighting. You only offered this ‘best friend’ after that

incident. ☺

3) My Exit from this world should be peaceful and without causing any inconvenience to my

near and dear ones.

4) I should be kept physically and mentally fit and active till last moment in the light of my

fears known to you. People should wonder about my sudden exit from this world. I am

trying my level best to worship four Gods namely Fire (Agni which represents work) Chandra

(Moon which represents kind, good qualities of mind) Surya (Sun which represents

sharpening & use of knowledge) and Avakash (Space which represents detached attitude)

responsible for exit from this world.

5) Kindly do not give sorrows, pains or difficulties to any one which can not be shared

openly.

6) I am not interested in rebirth. Please exclude me from your birth-death cycle.

I look forward to regular dose of your blessings. !!! ~~~~~

How are my Parents? I wish you ☺ New Year. !!!~~~~

Your follower ~~~~

Sudhir

31-12-2010


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S. M. Vaidya Tel: B. Com., F.C.A., A.C.S., Mobile: D.M.A., D.F.M., D.O.R.M. E-Mail: [email protected] Chartered Accountant ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Respected Sir,

I have completed the Internal Audit for the year ended 31-03-2011 in respect of the

branches allotted to me and submitted reports after discussion to HO.

I acted as Internal Auditor of Apna Bank since accounting year ended 30-06-1988. In other

words, I was associated with Apna Bank for last 24 years. However, this was my last

assignment and I have decided to retire from my Professional career with immediate

effect. This is not my sudden decision but I had planned my retirement when I was in the

midst of my occupational career.

Let me share my thoughts behind this decision.

I had set Life Time Table in my mind since young age. I was born in a middle class

family. I lost my father when I was studying in College. My father expired at the

age of 58 years, few months prior to his retirement. His post retirement dreams vanished

with him. I spent my childhood in the backdrop of my father’s ill health. His life span

was quantified by destiny. Hence, this was the first factor which governed my decision

of retiring at 60 years. I assumed life span of 60 years and decided to accommodate all my

dreams, education, career, social service, hobbies, relaxation, relations etc in this period.

Secondly my eye sight was poor since school days. I was half blind at the age of 10 years.

Against the advice of doctor I selected commerce faculty. It was expected that my eyes

will support me till that age. i.e. 60 years.

My childhood circumstances made me stronger, go getter, having absolute faith on efforts

(Karma) and a disciplined person. It also made me outspoken.

Having served in the Industry from 1975 to 1985 (of which last 5 years as Financial

controller), I joined CA profession from June 1985.


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Last two years, I was only doing the work of Apna Bank. My retirement plan was

activated way back from 1995 in a phased manner as it is difficult for a Professional to

retire in one go. I did variety of jobs in my career such as Company Audits, Nationalized

Bank Audits, Audit of Insurance companies, Audit of number of co-operative banks,

Insurance survey, GIC & LIC Agency, Examiner of Professional bodies such ICAI, ICSI,

ICWA, IIB, Paper setter of IBPS, Faculty member of BOI staff Training college / Apna

Bank Training centre / MSBL Training centre, Unit inspection & Monitoring of sick

advances of Nationalized Banks, incorporation of companies, Management consultancy

etc. Many times I looked after the business of the clients in the absence of director,

Proprietor. I was partner of two firms. All these activities I closed down in a phased

manner from 1995. The saved time was utilized to learn Astrology, Medical. I have spent handsome amount

in pursuing these hobbies. I learned Alternate Medical Therapies under the guidance of a

well known doctor in South Mumbai. Since 1998, I am using my medical knowledge for

the benefit of Senior Citizens of my society on an honorary basis. I have reserved one

day in a week for checking BP & medical counseling. I spent time with senior citizens. I

do counseling of young and old people. My study on Medical Astrology is in advanced

stage. I wrote / compiled Medical Referencer. I also wrote Referencer on Astrology.

I also devoted time for writing many Professional Books on Audit & other subjects such

as Marriage Event Management.

I have also written book on Life Philosophy. New articles are included in the book

regularly.

Photography was my passion since young age. I spent time for this activity. I have over

13000 photos & hundreds of Videos saved on my computer.

I hosted website www.spandane.com on 23-05-2008 to share my professional experience,

hobbies etc. Till date, it has recorded over 6,50,000 hits and is viewed from over 50

countries.

Last year, I devoted time to write Autobiography. It has been just completed and ran into

about 400 pages. However final editing is pending and I wish to upload it by end June

2011.


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As feared earlier, my eye sight (left eye) developed first major problem in 2002 of black

floaters. There is no cure for this degenerative disease. While I was finalizing Internal

Audit Reports of this year, my right eye developed similar problem on 23-04-2011. With a

great difficulty I managed to complete the Reports and handed over to HO on 25-04-2011.

I called on Eye surgeon for investigation. The condition was confirmed. Further

complications (of retina damage) can not be predicted. I am keeping my fingers crossed.

Your Life should be like square meal. Your destination of ‘Happiness’ in Life will be

your mind it self if you can manage to keep balance between your

educational/occupational career, family, health and friendship.

I enjoyed my association with Apna Bank. It was a refreshing experience. I am thankful

to you & other top level executives for the giving co-operation in discharging my

function. I followed pro-active & ‘Shreya’ approach in my career without forgetting

the human face.

I wish you and your Apna Family, a good luck, prosperity and peace of mind. I am

confident that Apna Bank will make new records of progress with your able guidance &

leadership. I am proud that I got a chance to play a small role for the success of the

organization.

We must realize that ‘Change’ is part of Life and also inevitable. Change should be

anticipated and we should mould ourselves for the change and there after change should

be accepted whole heartedly. Then again get ready to ‘Change’.

I am happy that my relationship with Apna Bank will continue as your customer.

(SB & FDR)

I take your leave with a heavy heart.

CA. Sudhir Vaidya

28-04-2011

िच . योगेश यास अनेक आशीवाद. व. व.

तु या आई या िनधनाची बातमी ऐकून ध काच बसला. आई या िनधनाची वेदना काय असते हे मी जाणतो. यामुळे तु या मन: ःथतीची मी क पना क शकतो. आईचे छऽ हरप यानंतर माणूस पोरका होतो. आपलेनातेवाईक असतात पण ती पोरके पणाची भावना आप याला काह काळ अःवःथ करत राहते.

तुझी आई (माझी व हनी) खरेतर ा काळातील झाशीची राणी होती. या धडाड ने ितने संसार केला, पतीिनधनाचे द:ुख पचवून मुलांना मोठे केले, उ च िश ण दले, सासू-सासयाना ध न -सांभाळून रा हली, नोकरक न व ादानाचे प वऽ काय केले, कुलाचार -सण-वार केले व संपूण कुटंबालाु मदतीचा हात पुढे केला, ा सवगो ीना माझा फ सलाम. सामा य ी या कुवती पलीकड ल ा गो ी ितने सहज श य क न दाख व या.

ितला भगवत गीतेत सांिगत या ूमाणे अ नी देवता, चंि आ ण सूय देवता यांचा आशीवाद होता.

गे या वष ०१-१२-२०१० ला मी ितला भेटलो होतो. आजारपणातून बर होवून नवीन उमेद ने नोकर वआयुंयाला िभड याचे ःव न बघत होती. पण देवा या मनात दसरेचु होते .

तू खरेच भा यवान हणून अशा आई या पोट तुझा ज म झाला. तु या प ी ला मु ाम हे पऽ दाखव. तु याप ीला सासूचा सहवास कमी िमळाला. आपली सासू कती कतु ववान होती ाची ितला थोड फार क पना येईल.

शलेैशला सांभाळून घे. आता तुलाच याची आई आ ण वड ल हावे लागेल. ःवत:ला सांभाळ. तुझे काका आ णआ या यांचा तुला आधार आहेच. आजीची श य ते हड काळजी घे.

मी व माझे कुटंबीयु तुम या द:ुखात सहभागी आहोत.

May Her Soul Rest In Peace.

सुधीर वै२५-१२-२०११

“Shree”

Chi. Aayush la aneka ashirwad.

Happy Birthday. Many Happy Returns of the day. Mottha Ho!!!

Today is your 2nd birthday. Last year also, I had written you a letter. I am once again

requesting your Papa to preserve all these letters and hand it over to you when you

become ‘BIG’.

Last few days, I have been telling you to speak atleast five words namely Papa,

Mummy, Aaba, Aaji & dada. Jokingly I have threatened you that unless you learn to

speck these five words, we will not celebrate your birthday. ☺

I would like to share one thought on your birthday. I would quote two thoughts, one

for your 1st birthday & one for your 2 nd birthday. I am aware that it is difficult to

digest, understand and implement these thoughts but you should always try.

1) Silence & Smile are two powerful tools. Smile is the way to solve many problems &

Silence is the way to avoid many problems.

2) It takes around two years to learn to speak…but it takes LIFE Time to learn “what

not to speak, how & when to speak etc. etc.

Last year i.e. 10-06-2010 to 10-06-2011 vanished very fast. You have grown big by one

year. Now let me share with some of the highlights of the last year.

1.0) We celebrated your 1st birthday at Dahisar residence. Your Aatya (Devyani) had

come with her kids namely Aryan & Neil. She had brought nice birthday cake. Aaji was

also present. I do not attend any functions but your mom desperately requested me to

attend the birthday party. Your Mom & Papa had fought (as usual) on some trifle issue.

I attended the function mainly to bring about reconciliation between them. (I have been

doing this on a regular basis over last few years.☺) I took few photographs on the said

occasion.

2.0) Your Kush Dada was sent to Raigad Military School soon after your birthday.

3.0) I wrote in last letter that by the time you read & understand, I may not be around

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and it is quite likely that you ‘may’ be interested in knowing me as a ‘person.’ Hence

I decided to write my ‘Last Lecture’ which would enable you to understand me and my

‘Generation’. I am happy that as promised, I have written my Autobiography titled

Spandane – The Last Lecture. It runs into approx. 400 pages. I can not visualize /

imagine your reaction. By the time you read & understand it, I may not / should not

be around. Let me share some thoughts on my exit from this world. I have been

requesting GOD for over 25 years to lift me on the occasion of my 60th birthday.

(i.e. 15-05-2011) but God has not obliged me with the request. But I will continue with

my prayer because I know that in the confrontation between the Stream & the Rock,

The Stream always wins …. Not through Strength, but through Persistence. I have

already written Open Letter to God to share thoughts on my exit.

4.0) Your health never posed any major threat during the year. However you sustained

head injury due to your Papa on Saturday, 13-11-2011. Your papa was upset with your

naughtiness and literally threw you on back seat of the car. You sustained head injury

and required few stitches on your forehead. It caused panic situation for all of us. Aaji

and I rushed to Dahisar. The reason behind the entire episode was once again rift

between your Mom & Papa. I have taken few snaps to record the event. I scolded your

Papa & Mummy for such ongoing rifts time & again. The main reason of accident was

irrational action by your Papa in his angry mood. You will have to control your Anger.

5.0) Now let me say few words on your personal traits discovered during the year:

5.1) You easily get angry on any matter happening against your mood. The Anger trait

has been inherited by you from your Papa & Mom.

5.2) Acting talent (slightly bending the head while talking, sparkle in eyes etc.) has been

inherited from your Mom.

5.3) Stubbornness, hyper activity match with your Kush Dada. Again inherited from

parents.

5.4) You are good at making observations of things happening around you. In other

words, you are good at ‘copying’ but unless you know where & when to ‘paste’, you

will become a laughing stock.

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5.5) You have innocent smile on your face. SMILE: - ‘S’ets u free, ‘M’akes u special,

‘I’ncreases your energy, ‘L’ifts your spirit, ‘E’rases all your tensions. So keep Smiling.

Preserve that smile. ☺

6.0) On Wednesday, 01-06-2011, your Papa had serious road accident while going to

Office. He was badly injured. The other person was more seriously injured and was

hospitalized. After completing all formalities he was released on bail at 2100 hrs.

We hope that now atleast he will learn out of mistake. (He has already made many

mistakes and yet to learn. But nothing wrong in expecting.)

From June 2011, admission has been secured in Play group for you. I have taken over 250 photographs of you and recorded over 75 videos in last one year.

All your snaps and videos have been saved in my computer and I am sure that you may

also be interested to see your childhood photographs when you grow up. I have created

this treasure for you.

God bless you.

Aajoba !!!!!????

10-06-2011

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Section ii my letters

Lifestyle

various letters

lecture section

hundreds of personal

thousands of official

letter writing

letters of different

family life

lecture index section