REVISION: Elevating your Style
Dec 28, 2015
DirectionsFriends don’t let friends hand in crappy papers. So….offer constructive feedback so your classmates
may improve their work!If something is definitely incorrect, mark it in red pen.If something doesn’t seem quite right, but you have
having trouble pinpointing the exact problem, highlight it in yellow.
When you hear the magic wand, rotate paper to the right.
Ultimately, everyone is responsible for his/her own work!! But, everyone appreciates help!
Proper Heading and Headers
PROPER FIRST PAGE HEADING:First LastMrs. HoltonEnglish III-Period 20 October 2010
PROPER HEADER AFTER PAGE 1:Holton 2
If there is a header on the 1st page (Holton 1) cross it out
OVERALL MLA FORMATTINGTitle should be centered below the heading
Entire paper should be double-spaced with no extra spaces between lines. (If incorrect, SPACING)
Font should be Times New Roman 12 pt font (If incorrect, FONT)
All Paragraphs should be indented (If incorrect, INDENT)
WORKS CITEDWORKS CITED should be centered at the top of the
final page of the paper (ALL CAPS)
Minimum of 5 entries total If either Whitman or Hughes is cited, the other must be
there too.
Entries are alphabetized ( ALPHA)
Hanging Indent for all entries:Last, First. “Title of Poem.” The Language of
Literature
WORKS CITEDDouble Spaced with no extra line spaces between
entries
All titles are Capitalized
All poem titles are in “Title.” (Bradstreet/Longfellow/Whitman/Hughes)
All book titles are italicized (Equiano/Douglass/Thoreau/The Language of Literature: American Literature)
WORKS CITEDThere are PERIODS AFTER ALL SEPARATE PARTS
OF THE ENTRIES.
Last, First. “Poem.” The Language of Literature: American Literature. (entry cont…)
BRADSTREET Literature PARAGRAPH
Claim is arguable and addresses Bradsteet’s value(s) ( CLAIM)
Both of the titles of the poems are in “__” and are in the first sentences of the paragraph
Has textual support from both of the poems ( MISSING TEXT)
BRADSTREET Literature PARAGRAPH
In-text citation gives the lines numbers from the poem
Period outside the citation
Example: (3-5).
( Correct Citation).
BRADSTREET Literature PARAGRAPH
The writer’s own words introduce the quotation Example: Bradstreet writes, “___” (5-6).( QUOTE INTRO)
Quotation from the text is appropriate for the claim ( BETTER QUOTE)
Commentary dominates the paragraph
Commentary explains what is Bradstreet’s primary value AND why ( COMMENTARY)
BRADSTREET Literature PARAGRAPH
Circle any of the following if they are not in a quotation from the text:
Contractions (didn’t/won’t/it’s/can’t/etc)
Circle any first or second person (I/me/my/myself you/your/yourself)
Vague words (bad/good/nice/blah/blah/blah)
REFLECTION Value PARAGRAPHTransition sentence helps move from Bradstreet
to claim of this value in the real world today
Claim is arguable and addresses change/relevancy of value(s) ( CLAIM)
Has real life support with concrete descriptions and specific examples ( CONCRETE SUPPORT)
Has at least two examples for support ( ++)
REFLECTION value PARAGRAPHIf any outside source is referenced, there needs to
be a proper in-text citation AND an entry in the WORKS CITED page.
(If either of these is missing, ( CITE!)
Commentary dominates the paragraph
Commentary explains WHY the claim about the value in today’s world is true
( COMMENTARY)
REFLECTION value PARAGRAPHCircle any of the following if they are not in a
quotation from the text:
Contractions (didn’t/won’t/it’s/can’t/etc)
Circle any first or second person (I/me/my/myself you/your/yourself)
Vague words (bad/good/nice/blah/blah/blah)
SLAVE NARRATIVE Literature PARAGRAPH
Claim is arguable and addresses HOW Equiano and Douglass convey their value of freedom ( CLAIM)
Both of the titles of the books are in Italics and are in the first sentences of the paragraph
( TITLES)
Has textual support from both of the poems ( MISSING TEXT)
SLAVE NARRATIVE Literature PARAGRAPH
Addresses HOW (imagery, appeals to pathos, etc) Equiano and Douglass convey their value of freedom
( LITERARY TERM)
In-text citation gives the page numbers from the book
Period outside the citation
Example: (565).
( Correct Citation).
SLAVE NARRATIVE Literature PARAGRAPH
The writer’s own words introduce the quotation Example: Douglass writes, “___” (565).( QUOTE INTRO)
Quotation from the text is appropriate for the claim ( BETTER QUOTE)
Commentary dominates the paragraph
Commentary explains HOW Equiano and Douglass convey their value of freedom( COMMENTARY)
Paragraph is Organized with all of Equiano together and all of Douglass together ( ORGANIZE)
SLAVE NARRATIVE Literature PARAGRAPH
Circle any of the following if they are not in a quotation from the text:
Contractions (didn’t/won’t/it’s/can’t/etc)
Circle any first or second person (I/me/my/myself you/your/yourself)
Vague words (bad/good/nice/blah/blah/blah)
REFLECTION Value PARAGRAPHTransition sentence helps move from
Equiano/Douglass to claim of the value of freedom in the real world today
Claim is arguable and addresses change/relevancy of freedom ( CLAIM)
Has real life support with concrete descriptions and specific examples ( CONCRETE SUPPORT)
Has at least two examples for support ( ++)
REFLECTION value PARAGRAPHIf any outside source is references, there needs to
be a proper in-text citation AND an entry in the WORKS CITED page.
(If either of these is missing, ( CITE!)
Commentary dominates the paragraph
Commentary explains WHY the claim about freedom in today’s world is true
( COMMENTARY)
REFLECTION value PARAGRAPHCircle any of the following if they are not in a
quotation from the text:
Contractions (didn’t/won’t/it’s/can’t/etc)
Circle any first or second person (I/me/my/myself you/your/yourself)
Vague words (bad/good/nice/blah/blah/blah)
CHOICE Literature PARAGRAPH
Claim is arguable and addresses the value of ( CLAIM)
Books and “Poems” are in the first sentences of the paragraph
( TITLES)
Has textual support from any of the works ( MISSING TEXT)
CHOICE Literature PARAGRAPH
In-text citation gives the page numbers from the book or line numbers from the poem
Period outside the citation
Example: (388). (41-44).
( Correct Citation).
CHOICE Literature PARAGRAPH
The writer’s own words introduce the quotation Example: Author writes, “___” (380).( QUOTE INTRO)
Quotation from the text is appropriate for the claim ( BETTER QUOTE)
Commentary dominates the paragraph
Commentary clearly supports the claim about the value ( COMMENTARY)
If did Whitman/Hughes, organized by author ( ORGANIZE)
CHOICE Literature PARAGRAPH
Circle any of the following if they are not in a quotation from the text:
Contractions (didn’t/won’t/it’s/can’t/etc)
Circle any first or second person (I/me/my/myself you/your/yourself)
Vague words (bad/good/nice/blah/blah/blah)
REFLECTION Value PARAGRAPHTransition sentence helps move from literature to
claim of the value in the real world today
Claim is arguable and addresses change/relevancy of the value ( CLAIM)
Has real life support with concrete descriptions and specific examples ( CONCRETE SUPPORT)
Has at least two examples for support ( ++)
REFLECTION value PARAGRAPHIf any outside source is references, there needs to
be a proper in-text citation AND an entry in the WORKS CITED page.
(If either of these is missing, ( CITE!)
Commentary dominates the paragraph
Commentary explains WHY the claim about value in today’s world is true
( COMMENTARY)
REFLECTION value PARAGRAPHCircle any of the following if they are not in a
quotation from the text:
Contractions (didn’t/won’t/it’s/can’t/etc)
Circle any first or second person (I/me/my/myself you/your/yourself)
Vague words (bad/good/nice/blah/blah/blah)