Nobody's Fault But Mine - The 6 Stages of Startup Founder Depression

NOBODY’S FAULT BUT MINE…My 6 Stages of Startup Founder Depression and the Lessons LearnedVidar AndersenFUCKUP NIGHTS Düsseldorf, April 16. 2015

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VIDAR ANDERSEN • STARTUP FOUNDER • EDUCATOR • INNOVATION ADVISOR

FOUNDING PRINCIPAL +ANDERSEN & ASSOCIATES

[email protected]

+ANDERSEN & ASSOCIATESINNOVATION & GROWTH THROUGH SCIENCE + ENTREPRENEURSHIP

FOUNDER…

FEATURED & RECOGNISED

AND MORE…

LECTURING AT E.G.

Cologne U

“[VIDAR ANDERSEN] ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT PERSONS IN THE GERMAN

STARTUP SCENE.”

CERTIFIED LLP EDUCATOR @STANFORD

LLP LECTURE QIA UNI, IRAN

MY NAME IS VIDAR… AND I’M A…

FAILURE FUCKING SUCKS!

HERE’S MY STORY OF #FAIL

IT’S 2011

The People Magnet

TECHNOLOGY• Rexter • Objective C • Django • HTML5 • Zepto • AWS S3 • Rackspace

Cloud

• Python • Werkzeug • Gevent • ØMQ • MongoDB • Neo4j • OrientDB* • Titan*

*experimental

VANITY METRICS

SUCCESS THEATRE

AUSTIN, TX

Literally all the cash I had left in the world on landing at SFO June 2013

All my credit cards where cancelled, bank accts frozen… (Thank heaven for PayPal)

DEPRESSION SETS INOf course you don’t notice yourself at first

STAGE 1:SHOCK & SURPRISE This can’t be happening to me

STAGE 2:DENYING ANY OF IT IS MY FAULTEveryone else is screwing up. I am doing everything right.

STAGE 3:GETTING ANGRY, BLAMING EVERYONE ELSE This is all your fault, you fuckers!

STAGE 4:GETTING DEPRESSEDDays of not getting out of bed, not going out of my apartment

STAGE 5:GRADUALLY ACCEPTING MY ROLE IN THE FAILUREWhat could I have done differently?

STAGE 6:GAIN INSIGHTS,CHANGE MY BEHAVIOURNobody’s fault by mine

LESSONS LEARNEDMy Main Take-Aways

IT WAS ALL MY FAULTNobody’s fault but the founder’s - ALWAYS

A-PLAYER IN GAME X !=

A-PLAYER IN GAME YI should have stuck to my game -A-Player in Game X attracts C-Players in Game Y

IT’S ALL ABOUT PEOPLEBe VERY VERY VERY careful with who you get into bed with!

GET EVERYTHING IN WRITINGBecause love is NOT all you need - Get the co-founder’s agreement up front!

NEVER EVER RUN OUT OF MONEYDo WHATEVER it takes to keep you afloat - as a startup AND personally

YOU WILL WIN SOME YOU WILL LOSE SOMEDo NOT put all eggs in one basket - diversify - DO NOT listen to the VC investors

STARTUPSNOT FOR EVERYONEIt takes a special kind of crazy to survive it - YOU WILL MOST LIKELY FAIL

BUT FUCK IT…

I’M READY TO GO AT IT AGAINSo either I’ve learned a lot - Or nothing at all

LET’S CONNECT:

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