Motivating Motivating Your Child Your Child A Parent Workshop Presented by Anne Henry & Alicia Schwenk January 31, 2008
Jul 05, 2015
Motivating Motivating Your ChildYour Child
A Parent WorkshopPresented by Anne Henry & Alicia
SchwenkJanuary 31, 2008
Myths of Motivation• NOTHING motivates some kids.• One day my child is motivated, the
next day she’s not.• External rewards are great
motivators.• Competition is a great motivator.• Punishment is an effective motivator.
The 8 Forces of Motivation
• Developed by educator Richard Lavoie (The Motivation Breakthrough: 6 Secrets to Turning On the Tuned-Out Child)
• Everybody has a unique motivational profile.
• Some of our motivational needs are stronger than others.
• 1-10 rating scale
Gregariousness:the need to belong
• Motivated by PEOPLE• Happy in a crowd• Puts effort in
establishing/maintaining relationships• *Reinforce role in family.• *Encourage interaction and
cooperative activities.
Autonomy:the need for independence• Motivated by PROJECTS, PRESTIGE, and
POWER• Likes independent projects• Decision-makers• *Give opportunities for responsibility.• *Works well on self-correcting activities.
Status:the need to be important• Motivated by PRAISE, PRIZES, and
POWER• Self-esteem is tied to others’ opinions• Extremely sensitive to criticism• *Avoid embarrassment.• *Celebrate child’s unique
strengths/interests.
Inquisitiveness:the need to know
• Motivated by PROJECTS• Values information.• Uncomfortable if he/she feels information
is kept secret.• *Show child how new tasks relate to old.• *Encourage child to continually reestablish
goals.
Aggression:the need to assert
• Motivated by POWER and PRESTIGE• Wants feelings/opinions to be recognized• Eager to confront perceived injustice• *Ask child for ideas and sometimes use
his/her suggestions.• *Avoid power struggles; allow choices.
Power:the need for control
• Motivated by PRIZES, PRESTIGE, and POWER
• Likes responsibility and authority.• Concerned with control and influence.• *Provide leadership opportunities.• *Ask for input on rules and tasks.
Recognition:the need for acknowledgment• Motivated by PRAISE and PRIZES• Craves recognition for accomplishments• This is true for many people.• *Give immediate feedback.• *Watch nagging or harsh criticism.• *Responds to awards and public praise.
Affiliation:the need to associate
• Motivated by PEOPLE, PRAISE, and PRIZES
• Craves connection with others• Gains strength from membership in group
or approval from authority• *Tell stories of your struggles, triumphs,
etc.• *Let child know that you truly enjoy
his/her company.
Parents Play an Important Role in Motivation
• Children are influenced by the attitudes and behaviors of parents
• Find a balance when emphasizing learning
Learning is a Lifelong Process
• School is the foundation• Share new things you learn each week• Model lifelong learning • Discuss what you would like to learn
Share Your Childhood School Experiences
• Subjects studied• Interesting lessons• Teacher
expectations• Classroom
management
• Ask yourself, “What is my message?”
• Make a commitment to share positive experiences
Establish an Educational Atmosphere
• Quietly read near student during homework
• Education is not limited to school• Discuss learning-related topics• Watch an educational show • Take a family field trip
Show Interest in Your Child’s Education
• Interest is essential component• Allow children to discuss the day’s
events• Ask, “What was one fun activity you
did today?”• Be available
Show Interest in Your Child’s Work
• Find something positive about each paper
• Use negative comments sparingly
• Remember mistakes are common in the learning process
• Frame mistakes as a learning opportunity
Help Children Set Achievable Goals
• Encourage students to focus on continued improvement
• Help children critique own work• Analyze strengths• Work on weaknesses
Homework is Children’s Work
• Parents can provide a workspace• Be accessible• Decide if help is necessary• Make a commitment to allow children to do what
they are capable of doing• Children lose desire to learn, if they believe they
are incapable
Grades• Grades generate many feelings within
a family• Genuine verbal praise for work is
very meaningful• Beware of monetary rewards
Show Respect for Children’s School
• Notice school events– Respond when signature is required
• Attend school functions & conferences– Children’s home away from home
Respect Your Child’s Teacher
• Make positive comments
• Negative comments lead to breakdown of learning process
• Listen if child is dissatisfied
• Do not agree or disagree
• End on a positive remark
Allow Children to Develop a Sense of Responsibility
• Let children experience consequences of their own actions
• Avoid, “Just this once won’t hurt.”
• Ask yourself, “Will this help my child become a responsible adult?”