McDonald_TDOS_GEN_Nov2014

The Demon of Synar

Book One of the FORCED TO SERVE Series

by Donna McDonald

Copyright 2012 by Donna McDonald

Cover by LFD Designs for Authors

Edited by Toby Minton, Karen Lawson, and Janet Hitchcock

Edition License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you're reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should delete this file from your device and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the author's work.

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is coincidental.

This book contains content that may not be suitable for young readers 17 and under.

About this book

When the original story grew too large, I decided to put the content containing the back-story, world building, and the first chapters that dealt with the plot into a short Book One. This book lays the groundwork for the series and will hopefully interest you enough to buy the others. Book Two is twice as long and more along the lines of what I envision for the rest of the series.

I started the Forced To Serve series as a group of paranormal, fantasy, and science fiction romances, but the stories have ended up being enjoyably complex for me. I loved writing about the inner struggle my characters are having as they try to be authentic. I loved writing about the battle of good and evil going on inside them all the time. These stories are a little bit of everything as most good science fiction is for readers who love it.

I hope you enjoy reading this series as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Character guide

When you are writing, and especially when you’re world building in a paranormal, fantasy, or science fiction story, you develop very intimate relationships with the characters you create and how they sound in your head.

Okay yes, I hear voices. And yes, sometimes they do tell me to do things. Usually, it’s along the lines of “either you write this scene this way or I’m going to play it like a movie in your head until you do”. Most of my characters are alpha to some degree. You wouldn’t believe how hard it is to get a happy ending out of them sometimes.

To begin this series, I decided to let the reader into my head to hear the voices I heard a little. So I’m including a list of the main characters along with a pronunciation guide. Not that you have to call the characters these names in your head when you’re reading—feel free to change them if it pleases you—but I thought you might like to “see” my spin.

Captain Liam Synar (pronounced Lee-um Suh-nar) SPECIES: Norblade AGE: 268 Intuitive/ Demon master/Ship Captain Peace Keeper Ania Looren (pronounced Uh-ni-uh Loo-ren) SPECIES: Pleiadian AGE: 918 Enlightened spiritual being/Warrior/Demon possessed Lieutenant Dorian Zade (pronounced Door-ee-an Zayd) SPECIES: Half Siren/Half Greggor AGE: 623 Empath/Intuitive/Warrior/Spiritual Counselor Commander Gwen Jet (pronounced Gwin Jet) SPECIES: Half Earthling/Half Thelorian AGE: 35 Strong-minded warrior/Passionate female/First Mate Chiang of Greggor (pronounced Chee-ang of Greg-gor) SPECIES: Greggor AGE: 142 Empath/Intuitive/Physically powerful/Healer Malachi, Demon of Synar (pronounced Mal-uh-ki) SPECIES: Demon Mist AGE: Over 1000 (he is not saying how much) Created demon/ Loves to control/Can possess any creature Unlimited power but bound by the Creators of All (name of supreme deities)

Prologue

Two years ago…. “I was nervous the first time I bound myself to a female as well,” Dorian said, watching his

best friend and current captain pace the room. “What makes you think I’m nervous?” Synar asked. Dorian laughed when Liam paused his restless pacing and gave him a strange look. “What still shocks me is that Ania Looren passed up dignitaries, presidents, other

ambassadors, and more warriors than I can count to tumble into your bed like a love stricken Earthling. I’m in awe of you turning out to be the one male in her entire life that she couldn’t refuse.”

“If you think I’m going to be indiscreet and brag about my bonding time with Ania, you are mistaken my friend.” Synar grinned at Dorian’s guilty, and disappointed, look.

“Being a Siren, my vows of abstinence are hard to endure every day. You have known me long enough to realize that this is a profound truth, Liam. But today the most celibate planet in the Alliance is tuned into your mating vibrations, as am I. As your best friend, the least you can do is let me live vicariously through you once in a while,” Dorian teased. “I know you were Ania’s first breach. She told me.”

“Yes I was, but I’m still not telling you any details. The first time is a private matter and a special sharing. You’ve been alone too long, Dorian. Find a willing female and start living again,” Synar ordered.

“I want peace, not another mate. It hasn’t even been a century since I lost the last one. I know not all creatures live as long as Sirens, but a century doesn’t feel all that long when you are grieving.” Dorian narrowed his eyes as his friend picked up his walking speed again. “Liam, you’re going to wear out your footwear if you keep that up.”

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me—just can’t seem to stand still. I’m truly not nervous taking Ania as a formal mate, just impatient to get the public ceremony over. My intuition is sending out massive warning signals, but I can’t tell if they are real or just a reaction to the events of this day.”

Synar frowned at Dorian who wasn’t even trying to hide his amusement. “Glad one of us can laugh about it. I don’t want to be an embarrassment to Ania in front of her family, so I haven’t said anything about my concerns.”

“Perhaps I should mark this historic day in my journal. The ever stoic Liam Synar has been brought to his emotional knees with mating nerves. Why are you even doing this ceremony? I distinctly remember Ania saying it wasn’t necessary for her sake. She said you filed the legal forms before ever leaving the ship.”

“Yes. I did,” Synar confirmed. Dorian smiled and nodded. “That means all the Peace Alliance planets will honor your

commitment. What will this ceremony accomplish?” “Ania is a high-level Peace Alliance ambassador. You don’t just throw one of those over

your shoulder and run off to your quarters with her screaming that she’s yours,” Synar answered dryly, shaking his head at Dorian’s outright laughter.

“You can laugh until it’s done, but it’s still happening. This ceremony is not for Ania or me. It’s for her family. They’ve waited a long time for their only child to take a mate. At least one of

us is represented. My mother declined to be here, which was just as well since she hasn’t spoken to me in person since my father died. Mother says she is still grieving. I suppose that could be true. She had more trouble believing Conor killed him than I did. I’m not even sure she believes it now.”

Dorian could hear the pain in Liam’s voice without even looking at his energy. His previous losses were large, but the absence of family today was taking a toll on his Norblade friend. It was his first mating and yet he would have no other Synars standing at his side to bless the union. His Siren mother had attended both his matings, and been there to comfort at their deaths. Truly he couldn’t even imagine what it would be like to be shunned by a birth parent.

“Is your brother still exiled?” “Yes,” Synar said, feeling Dorian’s sympathy reaching out to him energetically. He bowed

his head to his friend to acknowledge the support. “And it will stay that way for at least the next century of my brother’s life. Mother will just have to deal with Conor’s punishment and be glad that at least he isn’t dead.”

“Have you told Ania about your family? And your. . .inheritance?” “No,” Synar answered, adjusting the cuffs on his uniform jacket. “I ordered Malachi to block

Ania from knowing for now. Once Jonas is gone, the demon is going into the sacred amulet until I can find the proper person to rule him.”

Skipping over the advice he wanted to offer Liam about the dangers of keeping such a large secret from the person closest to his spirit, Dorian instead focused on the main issue he saw as a problem. “How can you be so sure that you are not the proper person, Liam?”

Synar looked and held Dorian’s gaze until he was sure his friend saw the truth in him. “No one in my family is worthy to rule the demon any longer. Certainly not Conor or me. It’s time the burden was passed on.”

“I can tell you sincerely believe that, but I think you are more suitable than you realize.” Dorian glanced at the timekeeper on the wall of the room they were in and saw it was time

for them to go. “Enough of this morbid conversation,” he said briskly. “This is a day to celebrate. There will

be plenty of time for you to mourn your errors later when you realize how much taking a mate is going to complicate your life.”

Synar snorted, refusing this time to laugh at Dorian’s teasing about Ania. “Your words offer me no comfort at all, Dorian. Tell me why we are friends again?”

“Because I haven’t had children yet and having a much younger friend is the closest I intend to get for a while,” Dorian replied. “Your blind spots about your life are very entertaining. You see only a very small part of the female who waits for you at the altar, my friend. It’s going to be interesting to witness your shocked reaction when you find out the rest.”

“Enlighten me about Ania’s character then,” Synar demanded on a laugh. “That’s what friends are supposed to do about each other’s females.”

“Well, I am an unusual friend if that’s the case. I consider your enlightenment to be Ania’s task, not mine.” Dorian smiled wider as Liam shook his head. “This is why I have told both of you that I refuse to mediate your mating relationship. But I confess it is amazing to watch two of the most intuitive beings I have ever met completely ignore their intuition about each other.”

“Maybe Ania and I know all we need to know.” With Dorian still laughing, Synar smiled as he stepped out of the vestibule. He looked across

the room at the female who turned and smiled at him as he headed to her side. Certainly he was attracted to Ania’s beauty, but there was something else that drew him, something indefinable in

her spirit. All the challenges of their mating faded when he acknowledged that larger pull to be near her. He’d never felt it with any other female.

Dorian followed closely as Synar walked to stand at Ania’s side, feeling the respectful silence of the congregation descend around the two of them like a cloak. Defying convention on her planet, he held out a hand to his mate, smiling as Ania placed hers in his without even glancing at anyone else. On a planet where all touching was considered something to do behind closed doors, her easy acceptance of his hand holding hers was more significant to him than any ceremony could ever be.

Synar glanced at Dorian standing taller than anyone else in the assembly and his first mate, Jonas, standing by Dorian’s side. He nodded his head to both of them that he was ready. Then he formally inclined his head to the entire assembly, before repeating the action for the officiant. Finally, he bowed to the female facing him. Her accepting smile as she held his gaze was all the assurance he needed that mating her was right.

“Ania Looren, before this congregation of friends and family I openly declare my sincere desire to be your mate for the rest of my life. All that I am and will ever be, I give into your power this day. Do you accept my offer and pledge?” Synar asked.

“Aye, Liam Synar. I accept your offer and pledge. All that I am and ever will be, I give into your power this day as well. Let us be declared as mates,” Ania answered, pleased that her voice was as confident and as sure as Liam’s.

“Let it be declared that this couple is mated,” the officiant announced loudly. “Joined by the will of the Creators,” the congregation added, the sound of their common

support rolling up the walls of the room and filling every fraction of space with joyful energy. Then the celebratory music began, the vibration of it swelling.

Smiling that the ceremony was almost over, Synar turned his head slightly and watched in stunned disbelief as Jonas fell to the floor, a large hole blasted through his chest, his life force leaving rapidly.

“Malachi! Come forth and stop those that seek to do harm,” Synar yelled, watching the mist come out and briefly hover over Jonas before moving off to do as asked.

Dorian and two other crew members scrambled to find those responsible. “Liam, who. . .?” Hearing her new mate call out an unfamiliar name, Ania instinctively

turned to the crowd and saw a weapon flash. Without stopping to think, she stepped in front of him and felt a searing fire in her back. She called out as she fell.

“No,” Synar yelled in shock, clutching Ania’s falling form in his arms. “Malachi! Kill them all but one.”

It will be done as you command. Not wanting to waste the energy needed to form sound, Malachi mentally sent his compliance and moved quickly to obey.

Synar sank to the floor clutching Ania’s weakening body. “What have you done, Ania? Why did you step in front of me? That blast was not meant for you.”

“Take care for your life,” Ania said, trying to tell him what she had seen even if she was too late to stop it. “I am returning to the Creators. Do not mourn me long, Liam. You know I have planned for this day.”

“No—this will not be, must not be.” Synar looked around the room, now mostly vacant except for the dead and dying bodies lying scattered across the floor. When the mist appeared above him, hovering and waiting for acknowledgment, Synar looked up in numbed surprise. He could barely think.

The attackers are all dead except the one being restrained by your Lieutenant Zade. Even he

is starting to wish he had suffered the same fate. Let Zade finish him for you and be done with this fight, Liam. You and I have a bigger problem to attend to because Jonas Tangier is no more, Malachi sent.

Synar looked at the male cowering by Dorian and at the carnage on the floor. He swallowed, focusing his thoughts. Are any of the Pleiadians who tried to stop them still alive?

One or two linger, but not for long, Malachi reported. Go into the largest one for now, but do nothing else until I command you, Synar sent. Do not

reanimate him. As you wish, Malachi sent back, heading for the best body he saw, glad that Liam was letting

him choose his host this time. Jonas Tangier had not been his choice, though he had grown quite fond of the easy going male host over time. Being in Jonas had been like taking a holiday from warring because the Greggor male loved nothing better than bonding with females and making music. Before Jonas, Liam’s father Bogdan had put him into an uneducated, giant stump of a Norblade. Malachi didn’t even want to think about that host body and what it had done.

Looking over the choices lying in front of him, Malachi thought he probably should have felt more over the loss of a host like Jonas. But after so many years and so many hosts, he could not seem to conjure the energy setting for such a corporeal emotion. In mist form, there was only the divinely driven need to find a way to continue his existence. Knowing Liam was still watching and waiting for him to comply, Malachi quickly disappeared into the largest Pleiadian guard he saw.

After Malachi was gone from sight, Synar lay Ania’s mostly unconscious form down on the floor and stood to walk over to the cowering male Dorian held firm. He looked down at his uniform covered in life force. Knowing it was Ania’s had his eyes glowing red. The killer glared back defiantly at him, but Synar also saw fear in his eyes. If there hadn’t been any, he would have made sure to put some there. And though he’d never ordered it done to a captive yet, Malachi was well skilled at torture.

“Did my brother Conor send you to kill me?” Synar demanded. “I warn you, your death means nothing to me now, so you might as well try to redeem yourself before the Creators receive you.”

“Yes. Conor sent us. He wants you and the demon. He said to take you alive, but kill everyone else that got in our way. The stun was meant only to wound, not to kill you. I swear it.”

“If my mate dies, you will die. If she lives, you will take a message back to my brother and tell him that killing Malachi’s host bodies won’t gain him anything. Your inept group left plenty more bodies for the demon to inhabit.”

Synar turned from the nodding male to look at Dorian. “Take this coward out of my sight and send medical help to look after Ania.”

“Indeed,” Dorian said, grabbing the male by his arm and dragging him out of the room. Synar went back to his mate, kneeling down to cradle her again. “Ania? Can you hear me?” “I don’t know why I did not see this coming, Liam. I’m sorry. I guess all I could think about

today was you.” Ania tried to reassure her worried mate with a smile, but her eyes closed and the blackness

she drifted in claimed her once more. “Malachi, come out now and do no harm,” Synar called, his voice heavy. In his concern for

Ania’s impending death, he forgot not to speak. Despite his natural Norblade calm, the pressure inside him to scream was barely restrained. He couldn’t let Ania die when he had the power to stop it from happening. He just couldn’t.

“Damn me if you must—but I don’t care if this is right or wrong,” Synar said, sending the words to the Creators of All.

He looked then at the demon mist floating in front of him. For a single moment he paused, but when he finally spoke, all hesitation was gone.

“Malachi. Demon of Synar. Enter this female’s body and lend her your life. Ania Looren is your new host.”

But Liam—you can’t mean to put me in a female. Malachi’s vibrations wavered as he protested the gender with both disdain—and shock.

“You will go into the host body I have chosen and do all I ask. You will repair Ania’s physical form and take no more from her than what is necessary for your survival. She is never to know you inhabit her. She is to remain just as she was before you,” Synar ordered. “Enter the female and heal her. I am your master. As I command, you will obey.”

This is a mistake, Liam, Malachi chastised. I am to be put into warriors and used to fight evil armies. Why do you dishonor the sacred contract? There is no redemption for me in this enlightened female.

“It’s either go into Ania Looren, or into the amulet, demon. If Ania dies, I will lock you away and drop the amulet into the volcanoes on Terris One. Your spirit will not die, but you will never live in a host again either. You can truly spend eternity in a fiery pit like many beings fear doing.”

Malachi hovered, flexed, but finally acquiesced. His tie to the Synar family exceeded his power to deny his current master. Cursing the Creators of All once more, he resigned himself to a dreary existence in the female for a while. He pulled his mist form together more tightly. I hear and will do all that you command, he vowed, disappearing quickly into the body of the female while Liam turned his head away until it was done.

Moments later, Ania’s eyes fluttered open and Synar let out a ragged breath of relief that he hadn’t been too late. “Ania—are you still with me? Help is on the way.”

“What happened, Liam? Jonas. . .” “Rest. . .don’t try to talk. We were attacked by an enemy, Ania. Fortunately, the weapon was

not set to kill instantly. You are severely wounded, but I believe you will survive.” “Good. Is everyone safe now?” Ania asked, moaning at the pain. “Yes, but I fear this is not the end of it. I must leave you and go seek those that did this to

make sure they will not do so again,” Synar said sadly. “You will be safe with your family. I will come back for you when I am done.”

“Take me with you. I’ll heal on the ship,” Ania demanded. “No. I can’t put a high-level Peace Alliance ambassador at so much risk. Heal while I am

gone. Let your family care for you. Serve your planet until I return from my task.” He stroked his mate’s cheek, wanting nothing more than to take her with him as she

demanded. But Conor’s hired thugs would just come after them both. Since he did not know when he would do it again, Synar bent to brush Ania’s lips with his. “I know you don’t like kissing, but I need to reassure myself that you live.”

“Perhaps I’m getting used to it,” Ania joked, struggling to return the pressure of his mouth. “Help is coming shortly, I swear it. Let them repair your body, Ania. You will be weak for a

while, but soon this will be nothing more than a bad memory.” When she didn’t answer, Synar realized Ania had fallen into the healing sleep of the demon.

Malachi was already working on her. Now he needed to focus on the actions that would make Malachi’s efforts count.

Dorian soon returned and walked to where they were still on the floor. “Help is on its way. The medics were afraid to come inside. How is she?”

Ignoring Dorian’s concerned question, Synar raised his gaze to his friend’s face. “We are taking the bodies of Jonas and the Pleiadian male Malachi went into earlier with us.

Put both on the shuttle. I will explain later. I will register the body we are stealing as host to my demon now. Then we are going to release the killer we captured and send him back to warn Conor that I’m going to be actively searching for him. If we check, I bet we discover Conor is no longer confined to the planet he was exiled to.”

“Is the Pleiadian male joining our crew once the demon reanimates him?” Dorian asked the question, but dreaded the answer. The words were distasteful, but Liam’s legacy was not a pleasant burden to bear.

“No. The Pleiadian male will not be reanimated. The dead body is a ruse to fool Conor. I have given Malachi a more noble assignment.”

Dorian looked at Ania’s body then, seeing the energy signature but not wanting to believe it. He prayed the Creators of All would have mercy on her spirit. “Ania was prepared for her death, Liam. Do you know how much she would disapprove of what you have done?”

“Yes. Ania might have been ready for her death, but I was not. The contract is made, and I will not be changing it. I chose to tell you only because I need your help.”

Dorian saw Ania’s lashes flutter open at the same moment he heard the medics finally running in to their aid.

“Hello Dorian. I forget sometimes how tall you are. It’s still like looking up at a mountain to see you from the floor. This sure hasn’t happened in a very long time.”

Dorian watched Ania follow her painful laugh with a moan. Despite his beliefs and his sense of foreboding about what Liam had done, he smiled down at his teacher and friend with great relief. Ania remained herself so far as he could see. He hoped that would always be true.

“Be assured that I have never forgotten a single moment of my training at your hands. And I would gladly reverse our positions if I could.”

Dorian saw Ania laugh genuinely at his comment, but it obviously hurt her badly to do so. Then her eyes closed again. With a tired sigh, he saw her enter the blackness calling to her.

As several healers rushed to help them, he and Liam slipped out of their way. They stepped away from the medics, keeping their voices low.

“Well? What is your answer?” Synar demanded. “Though I have many concerns about the wisdom of your actions, I will help you hide this

from your brother,” Dorian said at last. “I pray the Creators forgive us both if we are mistaken.” Synar watched the medics load a still living, breathing Ania onto the levitating transport. No

matter what the Pleiadian healers thought about her weakened condition, he knew Malachi would completely heal her in time. It might be the first truly noble duty the demon had ever performed.

“Ania took a laser blast meant for me, Dorian. Pray all you want for your own forgiveness. I don’t need any. I have no regrets about saving Ania’s life.”

“Let’s hope that remains true over time, Liam. Go with your mate and see to her. I will take care of the rest.”

Synar nodded and followed the medical transport bed out of the building.

Chapter 1

The two men sat across the table from each other, both frowning over their next mission. It was bringing up an old argument they had been avoiding for over a year now. Dorian clamped his jaw tight and glared.

“Be reasonable, Liam. What other choice is there? Stop being resistant to your destiny and set a course for Pleiades. You have to go tell the investigating counsel the whole truth.”

Dorian glared at his friend who was in turn glaring at the com station with murder in his eyes. Ania’s parents hadn’t asked for his return. They had demanded his presence for her tribunal and not accepted any of his excuses.

“Liam. Be rational in this matter. You know you can’t let Ania be punished for something out of her control. Besides which, your demon might kill more people if she gets attacked again.”

“Malachi is not my demon, and don’t you think I realize the risks?” Synar asked. “When Conor discovers how the thugs he sent were killed, he’ll know Malachi is nearby. I just wish I could rescue Ania without her planet announcing she’s a demon host to every other bloody planet in the Alliance.”

Dorian shrugged. He was already resigned to what must be done. “How can you face conflict after conflict on planets full of creatures who kill without thought, and yet hesitate over this? Do you really fear your brother that much?”

“Yes. Because no matter how much time has passed, my death is still Conor’s primary goal. More, I fear what Conor will do with the power if he actually gains control of Malachi. I can’t let that happen,” Synar insisted. “I’m caught between the past and the present, and I curse my father every day for that fact.”

Using his Siren intuition that he’d spent centuries perfecting, Dorian scanned his friend’s energy and saw that fear of his treacherous sibling was not Liam’s largest concern. The worst thing Liam feared at the moment was facing the wrong he had done to his mate for the past two years. “Are you also worried about seeing Ania again after all this time?”

Synar took a moment and then answered with a question of his own. “Did you know Jonas before he hosted Malachi?”

Dorian shook his head slowly. “Not well. Why?” “Jonas dreamed of having a family and was trying to convince his favorite bonding female to

formally mate him. When I put Malachi into Jonas to save his life, the female severed her relationship with him almost immediately. She said there was something different about Jonas and she couldn’t bring herself to bond with him anymore.”

Synar looked away from Dorian’s frown. It was obvious he didn’t understand. “I never felt physical aversion with Ania, but I also never bonded with her before I left. She

wasn’t healed enough. In our last discussion, she accused me of no longer wanting her. I let her believe it. It was easier. But the truth is, I detest the demon.”

“I’m aware of your feelings about your legacy, but I still say that all your concerns would have fixed themselves over time if you’d just taken Ania with us. Do you really still think the answer was to abandon her completely?”

“Regretting the past will not change it,” Synar said. “Yes that is true. Regret won’t change anything, but Liam—avoiding it won’t make it go

away either.” Dorian hoped the familiarity of hearing his first name would help the truth find its way into his friend’s strong mind.

“I didn’t abandon her,” Synar denied, the word bitter on his tongue. “I left so Conor would chase me and leave her alone. It’s mostly worked for the last two years. That proves I was right to leave Ania and the demon where they were both safe.”

“Maybe from your perspective your plan worked. What do you think the cost has been to your mate? What do you think Ania feels about it?” Dorian demanded.

“Do you think I did this all randomly, and without giving any thought to the pain it would cause? Well, I didn’t. I knew it would hurt us both.”

Synar drummed his fingers on the table. “Maybe I am concerned about confronting her again. Though I haven’t finished the third

training book, I can tell you there’s nothing about demons being hosted in mates in the first two books of training. My father would be sorely disappointed in the demon master I’ve turned out to be. I’ve all but gone mad dwelling on my actions.”

“I’ve known Ania Looren a lot longer than you have, Liam. Her spirit is resilient and truer than any creature’s I have ever known. She bears the mark of the Creators inside her. I believe she remains much more than a demon host body. In fact, she is a more complex being than you ever took the time to discover, which is why you underestimate her ability to understand this. You have always been blinded from seeing the whole person by focusing only on the physical desire you feel for her.”

“Physical? It was never the physical, Dorian. Ania was always small and fragile looking, and the lack of heat in her was vexing to me. I had to always be careful when we bonded. So no, it was not the physical. It was the spirit inside her, the way she had of seeing and dealing with things. I’ve always liked older females who were very settled in themselves.” Synar shifted in his seat and crossed his arms “Ania is unique. She can’t be replaced. It’s why I haven’t dissolved our mating agreement.”

Dorian’s spirit leapt to know that Liam Synar still had a great affection for his teacher and friend. Though he hadn’t been the catalyst for their meeting, he had counseled Ania to give his friend a chance when Liam had pursued her. Sure he had teased Liam in the beginning, but Dorian had seen even then that they were meant for each other. And in a way few mated couples ever were. Their pairing was not the kind of gift from the Creators that any being should set casually aside—for any length of time.

“I like your description. Unique is a good word for Ania, and she deserves more than you have given her, Liam. Don’t make me choose between the two of you again. I will choose very differently next time.”

Synar nodded at the warning Dorian always issued, as his friend stood and walked to the door. He spoke in anger before he could regret whatever pain his words would cause.

“As a celibate Siren, you have become quite adept at avoiding your own destiny. How can you claim to know so much about mine, Dorian? Are you ever going to claim your own mate? I’m not the only one who’s been avoiding things for two years.”

“Have I killed the other males in her life yet? No I have not. I know precisely what I am rejecting, but my compassion is hers. I have not stood in the way of her finding happiness with other males. Can you say the same, Liam? What if Ania were to find another male who might not walk away from her in times of trouble? Would you allow that?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. What would Ania do with another male?” Synar demanded. Frustrated with getting the same outcome no matter how many times they had the discussion,

Dorian sighed as he walked out of the room. “I will pray for your enlightenment,” he said. Synar frowned at his friend’s back. It had never occurred to him that his Pleiadian mate

might one day want to replace him with someone else. He assumed Ania’s fidelity was bred into her in a similar way as his.

His body didn’t even long for another female. In fact, his desire was dormant until he thought of Ania.

Yet now Dorian’s words made him wonder if hosting Malachi could have changed her nature in some way. Had she perhaps already found someone else? Would he even know this since he was so far away from Malachi?

Synar rose from the conference table and headed to his room to study the books of training again. His mind was filled with dark thoughts about the only female that he’d ever wanted badly enough to bind to him.

Chapter 2

“So what’s the plan, Synar? Are we slowing them down or just killing them outright?” Gwen rolled the power pack on her weapon until the charge indicator turned green.

“I don’t expect any problems, but if there are some, we just need to stop them temporarily. This is not a species that would kill us without very strong provocation.”

Commander Gwen Jet watched her captain turn away and try to ignore her, focusing his attention on adjusting all three of his weapons to the same setting. After two years of helping rescue high-level Peace Alliance officials from their sticky planetary situations, she had known what her captain’s answer would be from the stance of his body. She was merely entertaining herself with forcing her non-communicative leader into polite conversation. It helped pass the time.

“You haven’t said much about this mission, Synar. Who are we saving today?” In the two years she had served as his first mate, Gwen had never seen Synar so anxious for a

recovery to get started. Nor had she personally seen the Norblade warrior’s eyes glowing until now either. The rest of the crew often reminisced about a past when Synar’s eyes were like that every day. When he continued to ignore her question about the prisoner’s identity, Gwen stopped her preparations to stare, a rudeness she knew he hated.

“Captain, if I’m going to die today, I’d at least like to know why. Is the female Pleiadian someone special to the Peace Alliance?”

She heard Synar laugh at her question and saw him shake his head, no doubt writing off her concern as just unnecessary drama. If true, it wouldn’t be the first time he thought that about her.

“You will not die today, Commander Jet. Ambassador Looren’s detainers might not be so lucky though. They should never have placed Ania in a situation where she is being threatened in any way.”

Captain Liam Synar was without doubt the most stoic male Gwen had ever met. Since she heard something close to emotional distress in his voice, it only made the situation stranger and her more curious. “So you know the hostage personally?”

She usually kept her Earthling side on a tight rein, even though she had an insatiable desire to know the “why” of any circumstance involving her—or the crew. Years of living with her mother on Earth had done that to her. They had made her want to know everything about any plan before it happened.

But even if the Earthling side of her hadn’t been naturally curious, her Thelorian side would have not been able to ignore Synar’s apprehension manifesting in his jagged energy waves. To say his nervousness alarmed her was putting it mildly, especially since she was used to ignoring such readings.

She stared hard at Synar, not caring that she was forcing him to answer. “Captain?” “Yes, Commander. I know the hostage personally.” Synar stopped his preparations and met her gaze directly for the first time in several minutes.

Gwen’s eyebrows arched in anticipation. Was Synar. . .nervous? “In Earthling terms, Commander, Ambassador Looren would be considered my wife.” “Wife?” Gwen exclaimed, fumbling with the news as she completed her weapon assembly.

“That’s quite a revelation. Why doesn’t your life mate travel with you? Nothing in the service contract bars her from coming along. Or at least mine didn’t contain any anti-mate clauses.”

“There are good reasons Ambassador Looren does not travel with me.”

Gwen watched Synar turn away again, which meant he was definitely not willing to elaborate.

“Well, I suppose that explains why you don’t indulge in recreational relationships like the rest of us.” She had grumbled the comment softly, not really realizing she had spoken her thoughts aloud until Synar glared at her rudeness. “Sorry. Your lack of bonding is none of my business. But I have always wondered why you kept to yourself so much.”

“How very Earthling of you to assume so much from my revelation, Commander. Now if you’re satisfied with my explanation of risk for our mission, could we join the others?” He walked away without waiting for her reply.

“Ready when you are, Captain. You know I’ve always got your back.” Gwen snickered at his answering grunt. She had purposely used the Earth slang she knew

Synar hated to hear from crew members. Maybe she was trying to goad him into opening up a little more, which was rude and disrespectful in the circumstances, but holy hell. . . Synar had just revealed he had a secret wife. It made her wonder what else she didn’t know about him.

“Commander, remind me to schedule language protocol classes when we return,” Synar ordered, glaring at her over his shoulder.

“As you wish,” Gwen replied pleasantly, feigning polite compliance while knowing damn well neither of them would follow through on it.

Hearing Synar’s quiet swearing confirmed he knew it as well. Gwen bent her head and hid her smile. It was a familiar argument between them, but it was

the first time she could recall Synar getting angry enough for her to tell he was pissed. Spoken English language had survived many millennia and found its way out into the

universe as other planets were settled with Earthlings, and later, hybrids. Since Earthlings and their progeny were routinely now on most every ship in every galaxy, English was often the common work language. Even time was counted in Earth measurements among most Peace Alliance crews.

Synar always spoke English to her in their private conversations despite the fact Gwen was quite fluent in his Norblade tongue. But ultimately the joke was on her captain because Gwen enjoyed his insistence to speak English for reasons of her own.

To her, Synar always sounded like a stuffy academy professor. This was true even though he watched old Earth vids for entertainment. What they did for him, Gwen could never decide, but movies rarely failed to improve his mood.

She actually envied his ability to use something so benign to relax. Standard entertainment was not very relaxing for her. Instead, she preferred enlisting one of the friendly and mostly humanoid ship engineers for a few hours of rolling around in her bed.

An Earthling hybrid herself, her blood boiled with a restlessness that no physical outlet appeased for long. Her Thelorian father was similarly plagued and dealt with it by continuously working. It was one of the main reasons her parents had chosen to dissolve their mating arrangement shortly after her birth.

Gwen handled her innate restlessness by keeping her service contracts short. Every three years she moved on to another ship. So far in her fifteen year career, it had worked fine and allowed her to remain fairly content. Taking a life mate was not in her plans, or at least not until her career goals were met.

She had often wondered though how Synar could get by without some occasional physical relief. Both he and the resident counselor on the Liberator lived like they had taken spiritual vows of purity or something. She would have gone completely mad in the last two years if she

had tried to live like that. With only one year left in her current commission, she was already anxious to move on to her next assignment and to new bonding partners. Though each of the three were proficient at giving her release, she was bored with all of them.

Typically she didn’t concern herself with anyone’s love life but her own. Finding out Synar had a secret wife—no, mate, she corrected herself—was sure a shocker though. It provided a solid reason for Synar never having asked her or the other single female on the ship for bonding. She would have refused her captain on principal of course. She didn’t bond with her commanding officers.

Maybe now and again she had noticed that her captain was a prime male of his species, and one that looked to be fully capable of satisfying even the pickiest of females. Walking several steps behind him in order to literally cover his back, Gwen currently had a great view of his backside and just how prime he was. A female could do worse than to have to look at him every day.

Grinning with surprise at the direction of her thoughts, Gwen shook her head to clear it of useless fantasies. When her vision focused on the object of them again, she saw energy spikes shooting out of Synar’s aura like tentacles. They were so strong she couldn’t block herself from seeing them which probably explained her sudden awareness of Synar’s maleness even more than his revelations.

They walked into the shuttle dock area where three other crew members waited, including the Liberator’s blazingly attractive, but also celibate counselor, Lieutenant Dorian Zade. His height and breadth exceeded every other male’s on the ship. And as was true of most of Zade’s species, the male Siren was stunning with his light brown skin, black hair to his shoulders, and the bluest eyes she had ever seen on any planet—or off. She doubted genetic manipulation of any other male’s features could be replicated to produce such superior results.

As was his habit, Zade nodded in her direction to acknowledge her presence. His accompanying frown made her want to smile as she wondered what she had done now to irritate him. Granted his looks were a draw that any female with eyes would have appreciated, but it was Zade’s other attributes that she found far more alluring. When it was necessary to fight, the Siren was as fierce a warrior as Gwen had ever seen in her career. Even if he had been incredibly ugly, she would still have wanted to share his bed just to see if Zade was equally as fierce between the sheets.

But she would never know the answer, so that was another fantasy shot to hell. Gwen had learned the hard way over the last two years of her service that if you talked to the

beautiful Siren male, you had to be prepared for an argument. Not that she had ever used his services, but it still made no sense to her that such a contrary person could serve as the ship’s spiritual counselor. Nor did it make any sense that someone as attractive as Zade would voluntarily opt to live a sexually deprived existence. His refusal to bond probably explained the root cause of the Siren’s perpetual bad mood. His species had perfected the art of physical pleasure.

Why would Zade deny himself? It made no sense to her. In her first year onboard she had offered to roll with Zade. In fact, for a time she’d been quite

obsessed with the urge to do so. The Siren had refused her for reasons he still declined to explain. It had been two years now since she made her foolish offer, but it still smarted when she remembered how intensely she had desired him and how stoic he had been in turning her down.

Now she just kept her distance. She dealt with Zade only when she had to. Which was just as well because her stomach had a tendency to do strange things when he looked directly at her. Not

to mention that the energy vibrations coming off him scared her Thelorian side, as well as her Earthling one. That kind of persistent gut awareness of another being was nothing but a distraction in Gwen’s opinion. She did not want any part of it.

She had seen many female warriors like herself ruined by giving a male too much physical power over them. Such commitments often ended promising careers, especially those that landed a captain’s chair.

Gwen was glad to pull her attention away from her disturbing thoughts of Zade, when she heard Synar lecturing the mission crew.

“Do not fire at anyone unless ordered to do so. And do not under any circumstances attempt to touch the hostage. You must leave that only to me. Ambassador Looren is exceedingly dangerous. If ordered, you will take cover until I tell you to come out. Dismissed.”

“Wait,” Gwen ordered, grabbing Synar’s arm as he started to board. She waved the others on without them. She was sure she had misunderstood, but wanted clarification.

“Captain, I don’t think I heard you correctly. If something bad happens, you just want us to run and hide?”

“Yes, that’s exactly what I want you to do, Commander. It’s what you must do to survive this encounter.”

“Why?” Gwen demanded, not feeling she deserved the glare she received for asking the question.

“Can you follow an order just once without debating it?” Synar demanded in return, then snorted as he remembered who he was addressing. “If you must know, Ambassador Looren is a demon host. When she is threatened, the demon within her will protect her body at all costs. He is not discriminating. That particular demon will kill and drain the energy from anyone near her when he attacks.”

An internal alarm went off inside Gwen, one she had not heard sounding before. “Say that again. The ambassador is a what?”

Her demand bounced off his back as she followed Synar up the shuttle ramp. She took the seat directly across from him. It was all she could do not to glare at Lieutenant Zade taking the seat next to her. “I thought demon hosts were a myth.”

Synar fastened himself into his seat before answering. He had to raise his voice above the shuttle’s revving engines to be heard. “No. Demons are not myth. Neither are demon masters, though there are not many uses for them since the Peace Alliance came into being.”

“Are you telling me there’s a demon master we have to worry about, as well as a demon in the hostage we’re rescuing?”

Curious and concerned all at once, Gwen tried to reign in her curiosity by reminding herself the situation was potentially dangerous to them all. Synar was doing his usual imitation of a rock wall and refusing to look at her.

“The demon master is already among our crew, Commander. And before you ask, yes I have been aware of the fact all along. It was not a matter of concern since the demon was never nearby.” He ignored his young commander’s increased shock at his explanation. “No more questions. That’s an order.”

Gwen narrowed her eyes at Synar’s refusal. Rumor was that demons and masters were so powerful as a unit that their combined thoughts could become reality instantly. Legends told in books said the two of them working together could wipe out a military force of thousands without engaging in any normal combat.

Her eyes perused each crew member, weighing the odds for each of them being the one. She

even made herself look at her attractive seatmate long and hard, though staring that long at Zade made her want to sigh like a lovesick teenager, something she had never been—thank goodness.

Eventually, her gaze returned to Synar when she couldn’t figure it out. It was one of the few times she regretted not having developed her intuition more.

“Thelorian energy reading failing you on this one, Commander?” Synar challenged. “Don’t worry. You’ll find out which one of us it is soon enough.”

Gwen snorted at his demeaning statements about her skills. Even if it was the closest Synar had ever come to teasing her, his words were still dripping with sarcasm. She decided to see if her captain could take teasing as well as he evidently could dish it out today.

“The only person’s energy that is strange today is yours, Synar. Since you admitted the hostage is your wife, why aren’t you more worried about the demon in her?”

To Gwen’s astonishment, Synar laughed at her. Really laughed. She could only stare at how attractive he was without the stoicism it had taken her almost two years to get used to. Damn it. What the Helios was wrong with her today? She couldn’t get her mind off sex. This was so not a good time to be fantasizing.

“Are you seriously laughing at me over these questions, Synar?” “Yes, but it would take me days to explain my amusement well enough to satisfy your

inquisitive mind, Gwen. Since we do not have days to spend, you will just have to learn as we go along in this venture.”

Still smiling, Synar leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes. “I need silence to prepare myself. Ease up on the curiosity. I swear by the Creators, you’ll

figure this all out soon enough.” When Synar requested silence, Gwen knew it meant he would be praying or meditating or

whatever the ritual was the Norblade male always did before a potential confrontation. She watched her captain roll a second set of dark eyelids down and zone completely out, which fortunately meant Synar never saw her bang her head against the back of her seat in frustration. He obviously didn’t need more reasons to be irritated.

Gwen’s instinctual apprehension, fed by Synar’s unusual teasing, was far more worrisome to her peace of mind than his mention of some hypothetical demon master. That could be no more than a joke at her expense. Synar’s lack of real answers to her questions was in direct contrast to his actions. He seemed to be preparing for more than just a simple extraction of a high-ranking hostage from a mostly peaceful situation on the officer’s home planet.

As commander of the Liberator, it was her business to understand the risks, minimize them, and make sure one of the two of them returned to the keep order on the ship. So far she had made damn sure Synar stayed safe. She had no intention of letting anything change that record, not a demon—or a demon master. But it would have been good to know the rest of the secrets Synar seem to be keeping from her.

Gwen’s thoughts were chaotic and troubled as she thought about Synar’s strange mood. Suddenly she felt intense waves of body heat followed by a giant wave of calm floating over her tight muscles, triggering their release. She fought back the huge sigh that wanted to escape, refusing to look at the origin of those pleasant sensations. Spiritual counselor my ass, she thought, clamping down on her body’s reaction to Zade.

“You are wise to be concerned, Gwen. Life is going to change for all of us today.” Dorian spoke softly, leaning down to whisper into one very attractive ear peeking through Gwen’s short, but appealing haircut.

“And I suppose you know exactly what’s going on, don’t you?” Gwen frowned when her

snarky question came out more like a complaint because of the resentment in her voice. She couldn’t keep from squirming in her seat as she felt another wave of relaxation go through her. Sirens emitted calming vibrations naturally, but that didn’t mean she had to appreciate help she hadn’t asked for. He could just keep his damn vibrations to himself.

But when she turned to glare up at him, Gwen was surprised by the amount of concern in his gaze. Sarcasm was harder to come by staring into his baby blues. Luckily, it was her default setting. “If you’re going to whisper in my ear, Zade, at least make it good. What the hell is going on?”

Keeping his tone to a whisper, Dorian told her what he could. “I was with Liam when he and Ambassador Looren were mated. And I was there when she was brutally attacked and almost killed. What happened after was destiny, even though Liam does not yet accept it. Today he must stand and face his worst fears. He will need you to stay strong for the sake of the crew.”

Gwen sat up straighter in her seat, fuming quietly at Dorian Zade’s lack of respect for her position. He rarely used her title to address her. Instead, he always used her personal name. While from time to time Gwen admittedly wanted nothing more than to hear Zade calling her name over and over, she just wanted to be riding him to bliss when he did it, not sitting through one of his patronizing lectures about her sense of duty.

“There were good reasons I was assigned to be first mate instead of you, Lieutenant,” Gwen reminded him, refusing as she always did, to call him by his personal name.

Dorian inclined his head at Gwen’s defense of her role, hoping his expression revealed nothing of what he thought about her disrespectful, blatantly untrue statement. “Indeed. There were good reasons. I do not disagree. It is precisely why I stepped aside to let it happen.”

Gwen snorted in derision at the complete lack of humility in his words. “Two years and you’re still singing that same old tired song. Get over yourself, Zade. I got the promotion fairly, and I deserved it.”

Seeing more words would not advance any further understanding, not while Gwen remained determined to resist all new knowledge, Dorian settled back in his seat to face forward and wait for the shuttle to land. It irritated him that he’d once again felt overwhelmingly compelled to try to help the prickly natured female. And worse, he felt obligated to do so when he saw Liam unable to confess the truth of the situation to her.

Even now in his irritated state over her attitude, he was sorely tempted to tell Gwen the whole truth even if it was disloyal to Liam. As second in command, Gwen deserved to feel resentment for her captain’s lack of disclosure. She could well be the person Liam would have to leave in charge of the ship and crew if things went awry.

Not preparing Gwen for that inevitability was a bad leadership decision in his opinion. He decided the only reason he held back now was because Liam rarely made bad ones. Unfortunately, helping the crew and supporting Liam weren’t his only motivations for wanting to explain it all to Gwen.

And that was his real problem. He had been utterly compelled just now to warn Gwen personally that she was in for a big

shock today. His need to look out for her well-being was too strong to be ignored. The mostly Earthling female was way too young to understand the magnitude of what could

happen if the demon rebelled after all this time. He had often thought there ought to be a law against any being who wasn’t at least one century old serving on a rescue ship. Feeling his dark thoughts start to cloud his judgment, Dorian allowed himself to feel the full force of the bitterness festering in his spirit about Gwen’s stubborn ways.

Shades of Kellnor, she disturbed him. Maybe he was just getting old and starting to worry too much about the wrong things. He had

seen it happen, even to his species who sometimes lived for several millennia. At his advanced age of six hundred and twenty-three years, even Liam’s age of just over two and half centuries seemed very young most of the time.

Truthfully, the longer he served on the Liberator with the brash female who challenged his every word, the more he wanted to quit and go into retreat on his home planet. Maybe a century spent in quiet reflection would end his present torment.

At barely thirty-five years old, Gwen Shenu Jet was like an infant compared to most everyone else on the ship. Though admittedly, she was a fierce one. She was also the least experienced crew member, not that she had the sense to appreciate that fact. Even the males Gwen bedded on a regular basis to relieve her physical needs were all at least a century old. He doubted she had ever asked any of them about their age.

Not that her bonding habits with other males were his concern. He had explicitly chosen for them not to be. Her passions, when ignited, were likely just as shallow and fleeting as her anger.

And if her wiggling next to him was any indication, Gwen had virtually no control over her body’s energy settings even though she was half Thelorian. It was the Earthling side of her that always won in every internal conflict and it vexed him continuously.

It was also that same side of her that created the curvy body he couldn’t keep from admiring, despite his meditations to prevent his interest.

Shades of Kellnor. Dorian swore again, realizing his distracting thoughts had gone places he didn’t allow them.

It was impossible to remain emotionally neutral with Gwen shifting restlessly in her seat, brushing her extremities against his over and over.

How he could possibly want such a one dimensional, frustrating female was beyond his understanding. Her single-minded focus on her job kept her personal growth stunted worse than Synar’s did.

Would she be capable of understanding that if he told her? Of course not, Dorian thought, answering his own question. Synar was merely in denial.

Gwen choose daily to remain ignorant. Her lack of respect for her spiritual life was why he had never acted on his vicious physical need for her.

Who needed the kind of frustration such a female would bring? He certainly didn’t. And how Gwen enjoyed reminding him that she was the captain’s first mate. Hadn’t he been

the one who told Liam to choose someone other than him? Maybe Gwen was the first mate, but if so, it was only in the Earth definition of such things. The best event in that primitive planet’s history was being forced into the Peace Alliance.

Now all manner of creatures had settled on Earth, forcing their collective awareness past rudimentary differences to larger ones. Yet the mix of other cultures with their natives still produced offspring that grew up to be like the female seated next to him, regardless of which species shared the gene pool. Earthlings still had not figured out that longevity came from peace and calm, from using your inner intuition as a guide, and not from fighting every bloody conflict you felt until someone died.

When Gwen shifted restlessly for the countless time, Dorian turned to watch her throw her head back against the seat and sigh in frustration. It was one of her typical reactions to stress and always increased his concern. He acknowledged his urge to soothe her, but worked to let it pass away just as quickly as it had arisen.

To this day, he still had no guilt for trying to talk Liam out of taking Gwen on as first mate once he’d learned she was an Earthling. Thelorians with their energy awareness had their uses on every ship, but Earthlings were always poor choices for leaders. Their volatile emotional states led to breakdowns over extended periods of time. They got bored easily and then they caused trouble. Only two Earth years had passed and already Gwen was nearing the end of her patience. Because he was drawn to her, he sensed her growing restlessness like it was his own.

“This mission will not involve any risk to you or the captain,” Dorian said finally, tightening his jaw at his inability to stay silent.

“Well, that would make a nice change from our usual messes, wouldn’t it?” Dorian snorted at Gwen’s question, and turned away from her again. Yes, it was quite

obvious which side of her nature ruled her. Gwen thought herself a peace keeper, but it was her biggest illusion as far as he was concerned. If anything, she was a peace disrupter.

“Do you ever sit still for any length of time?” The fierce words spilled out despite how unwilling Dorian was to speak them.

“Just bite me, Zade,” Gwen answered, promptly regretting her slang when her mind decided to show her a literal image of Zade doing just that.

“Don’t tempt me to release my frustration. I would like nothing better than to do so.” The words were said through clenched teeth. He hoped he sounded irritated instead of like a rough-tongued male in heat at the thought of biting her. The female was getting to him, and raging fires of Helios, he had a decision to make about it soon. His body needed her despite how much he dreaded making the spiritual connection.

Gwen Jet was the third Earthling female in his life, but the only one to cause him the kind of anguished longing that made him turn to complete abstinence rather than claim her as he had the others. In six centuries, he had never understood why his body only seemed to want females from Earth for mates.

It was doubly annoying because all of them, even the hybrids, aged quickly and died. Neither of his previous mates had lasted much longer than a century no matter what care he had taken to preserve them. The only thing Dorian had not done was to share his life force, but that was altering the greater plan for all beings too much. Though technically possible for Sirens, his personal beliefs kept him from doing it.

At the end of each mate’s life span, Dorian had grieved their loss until he was mad with regret. Caring, losing, and grieving was not a cycle that he wished to repeat again any time soon. A male was entitled to a few centuries of peace now and again, and after the loss of the others, he needed peace. Which was precisely why the last thing he’d expected was to so quickly find yet another mating connection when Gwen had joined Liam’s crew. Getting over the loss of his last mate was one of the reasons he had taken a post on the ship to begin with.

Shades of Kellnor, where did a being need to go to find peace? When Liam’s head came forward and his eyes opened again, his attention left thoughts of

mating Gwen to marvel at the change in his long-time friend. Liam Synar had been a student in the academy where he had been teaching on Rylen. They had connected instantly and in the natural way true companions often do.

Looking in Liam’s face now, Dorian saw a version of his friend that he had not seen in a while. He saw a male who knew his true purpose, someone excited about life again. Even the air around Liam shimmered with an expanding quantum of possibilities. No wonder he felt longings and needs within himself awakening. His close connection to Liam would naturally involve that kind of goal sharing.

“I feel the power again,” Synar said, looking at Dorian with new understanding, his eyes fluctuating, pupils changing shapes as the familiar energy filled him once more.

The demon was calling to him. What surprised him was that he didn’t mind. Though he loathed the dark power he’d

inherited from his father, he had also missed it in the time they had been apart. His last use of the demon made it obvious that everyone was safer when Synar was away from the source. But when his thoughts about Ania’s safety turned as dark as Malachi’s about it, he didn’t fight them. When it came to protecting her, they were in perfect accord.

“If anyone has harmed as much as one hair on my mate, I will see to their deaths before Malachi has a chance to seek his revenge.”

Dorian smiled at the fierce words, understanding the bald truth behind his friend’s glowing red eyes. It wasn’t the demon that Liam was most worried about controlling, but rather himself as he faced the demon’s host.

“What did you say, Synar?” Gwen’s eyebrows shot up as she unbuckled her safety harness and stood.

Ignoring her question, Synar walked impatiently to the shuttle door. He was out of the craft before the ramp had fully lowered. When she would have lunged after him, Dorian put a hand on her shoulder to stop her from following.

“Hold back the demands sitting on your tongue and use your eyes instead,” he ordered, concern overwhelming him once more as her worried gaze met his. “At the moment, Liam is not the captain you normally serve. Remain as stoic as you can so as not to distract Liam from what he must do today.”

“What the hell do you mean? What has he got to do today?” Gwen demanded. “This secrecy is not helpful.”

“I agree, but these are not my secrets.” Dorian clamped down on his urge to tell her everything, to warn her about what was to come. “For once in your bloody life, Commander, use your intuition.”

Gwen jerked away from Zade’s grip and stalked to the door, not willing to take advice from a male who continually counseled her like she was a child. It irked her that Synar let him get by with his disrespect.

When they all got out of the shuttle, Gwen could see they had landed in a barren area just outside what appeared to be a city. Looking around, she saw there were other shuttles, like some gigantic parking lot in a desert. She saw the two suns in the sky and the one giant moon rising nearby. She knew they were in what Earth called the Taurus constellation of her own galaxy, but she couldn’t believe they were on the planet they were on. It was one of the most peaceful planets in recorded history, and one known for its benevolence to all. “Is this really Pleiades?”

Synar continued to ignore her, which left her no choice. Sighing, she glanced over her shoulder at Zade who nodded briefly in answer. Next time, she was monitoring the damn shuttle course herself instead of letting Synar see to it.

At least they were on a planet that had been among the first to adopt the English language. It was obvious she was going to have to get her information from sources other than her captain. Synar was staring ahead, his eyes unfocused and all but glazed over with a weird light in them. She wasn’t sure he had even come out of his meditative state yet.

Gwen pulled herself up straighter, prepared to do what was necessary. “Captain Synar, this is a peaceful planet of the Alliance. Why have we landed an hour’s walk from the city instead of inside its walls?”

She knew she was the only one on the crew who could, or would ask such a question. Zade never seemed to want to hold Synar accountable, no matter how far-fetched the plan. When Synar turned to glare at her yet again, Gwen swallowed hard but did not back down from her right to ask. Damn it. It was her duty.

“If the crew is at risk, I want to know.” “The crew is not at risk, Commander. You are not at risk. I am working to make sure that

remains true for everyone we come into contact with today. We’re out here because I needed more time to prepare. Could we make the walk in silence while I do so?”

She huffed out a breath, wondering what to do now. Maybe going to collect his wife was getting to Synar, because he was simply not making any sense.

But her intuition, which she used only in dire emergencies, wasn’t sending off any loud alarms yet. Suddenly Zade’s advice to use her eyes seemed to be not only her best option, but her only one, so she nodded once to let Synar know she accepted his statement.

Then to reassure the crew that Synar’s defensive attitude wasn’t worrying her, Gwen snorted and lifted her hand to the dirty road, sweeping it to indicate they would all go along.

She watched Synar stalk off, leaving them to follow or not. But it was obvious to her that he didn’t really care. The biggest part of Synar’s attention seemed to already be on wherever they were going.

Chapter 3

“Ambassador Looren, the charges against you are quite serious. I urge you to consider your answers more carefully. Now I ask you once again—did you kill the three Greggor males who attacked your family or not?”

When the Commissioner presiding over the tribunal stared at her, Ania lifted her chin and stared back, sighing with frustration at having to repeat her statements over and over.

“I can only continue to tell you what I’ve already been telling you. I have no memory of killing the Greggor males. Though considering my father and mother both were physically accosted, and that several of their servants were injured and killed, I also feel no regret for their deaths—whatever the cause.”

What more did they want from her? No one had offered any statement yet that pointed to a motivation for the attack. No matter how many times they asked, she could only tell them what she remembered, and didn’t remember.

“Most Greggors are benevolent, Commissioner. I do not understand why those three males attacked my family without provocation. Nor do I understand why I am on trial.”

“Ambassador, we have covered this, but let me repeat it once more. The witnesses who called for help said you were pushed to the ground and held there by two of the males. The witnesses said you eventually broke their hold on you and killed all of them with only your hands.”

When the commissioner paused, seemingly for dramatic effect, anger at the male rose swiftly, hot and blinding. The shock of feeling such a powerful emotion made her hold her tongue for fear of what she might say or do to him.

“I concede that one lone female defending herself against three strong Greggor males is a hard story to believe, yet the witnesses have been truth tested and passed. How can you not remember fighting three men, Ambassador?”

“I do not know what more you want me to say if you remain unwilling to hear my words as truth.”

Ania spoke calmly, hoping her voice was completely free of guilt because she felt absolutely none. The commissioner’s disapproving glare did not intimidate her. His disbelief was obviously not within her power to change since the irritating male had already made up his mind that she was lying.

“Because of your position, we are allowing you the privilege of speaking on your behalf instead of having your memories medically scanned. However, your refusal to be honest with this tribunal continues to be a waste of time. Enough people saw what happened for us to believe them. What I cannot determine is why you are not willing to confess when there will likely be no penalty for doing so.”

“Would you prefer I lie just because you can’t accept what I say as truth?” Ania asked. “Indeed no, but what is the truth, Ambassador?” Ania suddenly wondered the same thing. She couldn’t help sighing over a situation that

continued to elude her intuition as well as get lost in her memories. Something deep inside her struggled to see beyond the confusion, but all it encountered was a wall of blankness.

Her longing to know ran deep, but had less to do with the investigation than just her own frustration with her life. In the last couple of years, she had ceased to care about a good many things. Her personal sadness had made her a less compassionate person, but that didn’t mean she

was responsible for doing what they said she did. As a reformed warrior, Ania knew she was technically capable of causing the Greggor

deaths, but she doubted anyone in attendance at the tribunal had looked far enough back in her history to know that about her. Most of those hearing her statements today were less than half her age.

Perhaps she was known in political circles, but none of her judges knew her. If she had really caused those deaths, she certainly would not have hesitated to say so. The Greggor males had deserved to be stopped by whatever means necessary to prevent them from hurting anyone else.

Yet as much as a person could philosophically reason that the Greggors deserved to die, she could not confess to what she had not done. The only thing she remembered of that day was seeing her father being hit over the head and her mother being struck across the face repeatedly. She didn’t even recall what information the males had been trying to find out from her parents.

The last memory she had was of two males holding her down and a third one pulling back his fist to hit her.

The next memory was awakening on the ground in the middle of her unconscious injured parents and the three dead attackers. There had been a bit of regret then, but she had not known why.

Ania put a hand to her stomach as a huge cramp swept through her. She had been to a healer on multiple occasions, but they could find no explanation for the internal pain she endured all the time. Yet today, the cramps were occurring every few minutes instead of their normal interval of every few days. She could only conclude it was a reaction to her required appearance before the tribunal. Perhaps at her advanced age, such a physical reaction to stressful times was something to get used to happening more and more.

When the doors at the back of the room opened, she was completely surprised to see the one male she believed to be no longer invested in her welfare come strolling in, obviously heading straight to her. Scanning for lingering hurt inside herself, Ania was relieved to find little remaining pain concerning Liam Synar’s abandonment. All she felt was the pull her body typically felt in his presence. But that she could ignore. She’d had plenty of practice doing so over the last two years.

Why was Liam even here? Her mind could not come up with any reason except that her parents must have called him about what had happened.

“Captain Synar—thank the Creators for your presence at last.” Ania heard the Pleiadian commissioner utter Liam’s name respectfully and saw he was

obviously relieved at his appearance. She put her hand to her stomach as another cramp hit even harder. It was all she could do to bear the pain today without revealing it.

“Thank you for coming, Captain. The tribunal apologizes for demanding your presence, but we have a most unusual situation with your mate. We believe Ania Looren killed three Greggors during an attack on her family, but she swears no memory of it. We are seeking to understand before determining if Ambassador Looren needs to be put through mental reconditioning. Her parents refused to stand as your proxy for the medical evaluation. As her mate, it properly falls to you, since in all probability Ambassador Looren has become unstable.”

Synar flinched at the commissioner’s explanation. Ania’s inquiry was turning out worse than he had imagined. Social reconditioning was something Pleiadians had instituted several millennia ago. Though it was invasive on the subject’s mind to alter memories and thoughts, reconditioning was not a terrible idea for true criminals.

It would never work on Ania, of course.

Malachi considered the host body to be his own during his inhabitation. The demon would kill all the healers just for trying to control her. While he dreaded the effects of the revelation he had to make, words to defend Ania tumbled out of his mouth.

“It was not my mate who directly committed the crimes, Commissioner. Because of the extraordinary circumstances of my explanation, it is best shown instead of discussed. May I demonstrate?”

Hoping not to have to tell Ania the truth in the middle of a legal proceeding, Synar waited for permission to be granted. He watched the commissioner turn and look at the tribunal sitting nearby, stoically absorbing their nods and shrugs. Finally the commissioner turned back.

“We are willing to indulge you for a few moments if it would help clarify, Captain.” Synar looked fully at Ania for the first time since he had come into the hearing. The sight of

her, coolly beautiful as always, almost took him to his knees. He felt Dorian’s mind reaching out to his in support, but still had to clear the emotion from his voice to speak. As Dorian had warned, he had indeed not been prepared for the effect seeing her would have on him. He had not known until now just how much he had missed her.

“It does my eyes good to see you once more, Ania. I apologize for the additional pain I must cause you, but it is for the greater good of all.”

The female he’d cherished enough to mate was now staring at him like he was a stranger. Disappointed, but also understanding the cause, Synar ignored Ania’s lack of emotional response to him. He knew he must choose to only see her for what she was now, which was a host to his demon. It was the only way he could do what must be done.

Synar reached out his hand, pointing toward Ania, his eyes glowing. Hers began to glow in return. “Malachi, hear me. I command you to leave the host. Come forth, but do no harm to anyone.”

Ania had no time to wonder why Synar was speaking so strangely. The pain in her gut returned, magnified to a level not able to be ignored. She clutched her stomach again, calling out as she fell to the floor too weak to remain upright. Confused, she imagined that a blanket of black mist was lifting off her. She closed her eyes weakly, feeling like all her life force was draining away.

From her prone position, Ania’s pain-filled gaze took in the mist forming into a shadowy figure, with no understanding of who or what he was. Her eyes closed more as the dark male’s opened wider and looked in her direction. She fought the urge to sleep, but could not keep her eyes open. Drifting, her consciousness faded until everything around her became a hazy dream.

Liam frowned at Ania’s fallen body. The mist whispered thanks softly as it finished assembling itself into a short, well-formed male with dark hair in a dark suit of clothing. Liam pulled his gaze from Ania to look at the being in front of him.

It took Malachi several times to direct his energy into what passed for a resonating voice. His vocal skills were rusty after not speaking for two years. “Well there you are at last, Liam. I had all but given up on seeing you again.”

“Did you kill the men who attacked your host?” Synar demanded, wanting to get to the point as quickly as possible.

“I missed you too, Liam Synar, son of Bogdan, keeper of the sacred contract. You look just as impressive as always.”

“Answer the question.” “Yes. Of course I killed them. They intended to kill my host, not to mention her parents. And

as you can see, I have guarded the female and kept her alive as you directed. In fact, I have done

all you asked. Now release me from her and let me find a male host. I should be rewarded for what I have endured.”

“You forget what you are, Malachi. You have done as I asked because you have no choice but to obey me,” Synar declared. “And you will continue to do all I ever ask for the same reason unless you wish to return to oblivion.”

“Just as much fun as always I see. You still can’t take a joke,” Malachi complained, shoving a misty hand into a misty pocket. “Wait now—what’s my line from all those Earth entertainment vids you enjoy so much? Oh yes—now I remember. What is your bidding today, oh demon master? There. I’m being submissive and agreeable. Is that better?”

When Synar just continued to frown, Malachi groaned in mock frustration. “Such a pitiful entity you are, Liam. Your mate was always a restrained creature, but her

sense of humor completely died when you abandoned us. I’ve been bored, and she’s been depressed. This was not a good situation. You should be ashamed of yourself. If your father were alive, we would both punish you.”

“Silence your tongue until I command you to speak again,” Synar ordered loudly. He turned to address the commissioner. “This is the being who killed the men. If Ambassador Looren’s life was threatened in any

way, the demon would have done what was necessary to save his host body. I read the charges before coming here. From what the witnesses described, it was an act of survival.”

There was utter shock on the faces of those riveted to Malachi and him. Synar was not surprised at their reaction, and did not look away from their censure. Instead he looked at Ania’s body and thought about going to help her instead. It bothered him to see her lying virtually lifeless on the floor. It was their mating day all over again.

His attention came back to the present when he heard the commissioner speaking. “This is a most upsetting situation, Captain Synar. Why is Ambassador Looren not registered

as a demon host? Obviously, this deplorable situation makes her ineligible to continue her diplomatic duties. Hosting a demon is a very unethical action for someone of her advanced enlightenment.”

“My mate does not know her life is tied to a demon’s. When Ania was near death but still alive, the demon needed a new host. I made an expedient decision to use her body and was within my rights to do so given my mate status. Most demon hosts live unaware of their state,” Synar said coldly, hearing Malachi laughing. “Ania is for the most part who she has been for all the time she has served the Pleiadian people. It never occurred to me that it would interfere with her political duties.”

You don’t sound like you really believe that, Malachi sent telepathically, forcing the words and the skepticism he felt into his master’s mind. You don’t trust that I left your mate’s essence alone, despite your commands. Why don’t you trust me, Liam? When have I ever disobeyed you?

Synar tightened his mouth at the chastisement, even if it was just being spoken in his head. No, I don’t trust you, he sent back. You are a demon. And I am not a fool.

You have a lot to learn about being a master, Liam. You could at least show me a bit of gratitude. Unlike you—I actually did take good care of your mate, Malachi stated, pulling his energy back.

The commissioner’s disgusted look made Synar want to swear. He wasn’t offended at the Pleiadian male’s opinion, just disgruntled that the situation had worked out like it had. Now there would be no shielding the truth from anyone.

“There is no need to convene and discuss this. The laws are quite clear on the matter. The

entity once known as Ania Looren must be told at once of her situation and given the chance to decide whether or not to continue it, Captain Synar. Demon possession is against the spiritual beliefs of the Pleiadian people. Her record of service as Ambassador for the Peace Alliance is exemplary. If your mate does retain mental cognizance as you say, then she deserves to be allowed her death choice. Your reluctance is understandable—but not acceptable.”

Synar nodded that he was hearing what was said, but though he held the commissioner’s gaze, his thoughts were already on how fast he could get Ania and his crew out of there. Conor could even now have a group waiting for another chance to strike. He put his full attention on the commissioner, hoping the lecture he was getting wouldn’t last much longer.

“The graver matter is that your absence has been in direct violation of both Pleiadian law and the agreements that demon masters of all planets have followed since the demons were created. You know it is expressly forbidden for demons and demon masters to be physically separated for more than the very briefest of times. How long have you been away from the host body of your demon?”

The commissioner’s demand echoed in the chamber. Synar knew all ears were straining to hear his reply.

“When you are rescuing high level officials and doing the work of the Peace Alliance, you don’t mark time in quite the same way as when you are on planet, Commissioner. What matters is that I am here now and bow to your will.”

Swearing on the inside, Synar bowed his head in deference to the huffing male. “Really, Captain Synar? Are you willing then to resume a more responsible role as master of

the demon within your mate?” Synar nodded once, disturbed by the disgust on the commissioner’s face more than by his

words. Many probably considered his actions despicable. Even Dorian still had his concerns. But what was he supposed to have done? Ask Ania’s permission to save her life?

His gaze went to the female still lying on the floor. Weakened she might be, but Ania lived. That’s all he cared about.

His gaze came back just as the commissioner looked at the tribunal again. “The law is clear, but due process must be observed. All in favor of Captain Liam Synar

taking the demon and its host body off planet, state their support.” The response was unanimous and instant. “Very well. Charges are now officially dropped. Going forward, the entity once known to the

Pleiadians as Ania Looren will be registered as a host body to Malachi, the Demon of Synar. She will henceforth be considered the property of Captain Liam Synar for the purposes of these proceedings and for future reference. Her parents will be allowed to erect the death monument to her former existence as is customary. A new Pleiadian ambassador will be appointed after the traditional three light cycles of mourning.”

Synar fought back a weary sigh of resignation and the accompanying anger that he felt. The decision of the tribunal meant Ania might as well be really dead because her people had just made her legally so. This is what he had feared would happen and a large part of why he had left. Now he could see his absence had been for nothing, unless you counted the fact that Conor hadn’t managed to kill her yet.

Synar felt the weight of his choices squeezing his chest, but could not give in to his regret with all gazes in the chamber fixed on him, including his crew. It would not help their current situation for him to release the anger and frustration he felt. It certainly would not save what was left of Ania’s life. Only one thing could do that and it was still within his power. Maybe it was

the only thing that was. “Malachi,” Synar called, pointing at Ania’s body as he had done once before when there had

been no other acceptable choice. “Enter your host and lend her your life.” The demon snorted once, but faded into a mist that found its way to Ania’s body on the floor.

Moments later, Synar watched a set of confused eyes flutter open. He felt the same enormous relief he had felt the first time Malachi had brought Ania back from the edge of death.

Though he knew the demon resented being hosted in a female, Synar had no plans to let him go into any other host as long as what was left of Ania drew even the smallest breath. He walked resolutely to her and bent down to offer his hand, knowing those who now despised her were watching.

Wondering how she came to be lying on the floor, Ania put her hand out to the only male she had ever instinctively trusted to touch her so freely. And as she had on her mating day, she ignored the disapproving frowns of the Pleiadians in the tribunal whose narrowed gazes condemned her.

Ironically, holding Liam’s hand for physical support meant nothing to her sensibilities. It was the same liberty she would have allowed any medic. What still stunned her was that after hundreds of years, she had set aside her spiritual vows to share his bed as well.

Hadn’t the time her legal mate left her alone with no contact at all been enough punishment for her utter foolishness about him? Why was she now randomly waking up in strange places accused of violent acts she couldn’t recall committing?

Ania hoped the Creators of All knew that she had more than learned her lesson. Looking at Liam’s clenched jaw and hard gaze still locked on her, Ania decided their legal

attachment was something she would resolve at first opportunity. Once that was done, perhaps then she would find some act of atonement that would restore her spiritual life.

“What just happened to me, Liam? I felt strange, and then I remember seeing you talking to a strangely dark male for a moment. After that there is nothing in my recall until I woke up on the floor. Did I actually fall asleep during the proceedings?”

“Yes. You were very stressed and fell asleep. The good news is that the inquiry concerning the death of your attackers is over. You are released from the tribunal’s investigation without being charged. Further explanations will have to wait though. We need to leave.”

Synar bit back a sigh, feeling Ania’s hand beneath his just as warm as it ever had been. He only resented that the warmth in her was more Malachi’s than hers. But instead of feeling anger about it, a sadness like no other he’d ever known washed over him. His time away had not helped distance him from the pain of losing the life he had wanted and planned to have with Ania.

Now what was he supposed to do? He couldn’t leave her again. Conor would increase his efforts to kill her, especially after he learned the truth.

No. She had to go with them when they left. There was no other choice. “You are still in danger, Ania. I regret this situation has happened, but you must come with

me now to say your goodbyes to your family. We must leave Pleiades immediately. I fear your parents’ lives will be at further risk if we don’t. I ask you to trust me in this matter until I can explain.”

Synar searched Ania’s gaze for acceptance. He didn’t find it, but she did incline her head at his words. Her acquiescence only reminded him that he had once committed his life to serving her—and protecting her from pain.

How could he possibly explain his actions to her?

His mind could not even conceive of a reasonable way to tell Ania everything. Probably because there was none. The tribunal’s paperwork from her inquiry would eventually reveal his confession. So there was no keeping Malachi’s presence in her body a secret any longer, regardless of his desire to do so.

Now because of his promises to the commissioner, Synar also had to think about what he would do if Ania asked to be rid of the demon. Obligated to her Pleiadian laws or not, could he really let her have the choice? He gripped Ania’s hand more tightly, everything in him rebelling at the thought of being ordered to let her die.

“Come with me, Ania. Quickly please.” Synar tugged her along, trying to rush without alarming her any more than there was need.

Strength slowly returned to her limbs as Ania walked beside Liam, but she still had to lean heavily on his arm. Under other circumstances, she might have lived in the moment enough to enjoy her mate’s touch after the barren time she had survived without it. Instead, Ania found her awareness drawn to the familiar stirring of something inside her, something that over the last two years she had never quite understood.

The fluttering within her sometimes caused her to imagine her body was carrying a child. Not that she’d ever carried a child, but it was just a terribly strange sensation without adequate description. Now it made her wonder what was going on and how much Liam knew about it. Her intuition kicked in and sent a full and complete knowing that the secret—whatever it was—was behind the attack on her and her family.

Was Liam lying to her about something? It was an odd concern to have in these circumstances. She frowned at his profile as she pulled

her hand from his, no longer wanting the contact. She heard Liam sigh, but he continued walking on, seeming not to be affected by her withdrawal. It had been a long while since her intuition had spoken to her so strongly.

Walking slightly behind him now as they left the room, Ania passed what she assumed were several of his crew members since they were all dressed in drab uniforms much like Liam’s. The Earthling female with first mate insignia was glaring at her while sending equally hard looks in Liam’s direction, though he did do well at ignoring her.

Still, it was obvious that particular female felt she had some personal right to critique Liam’s actions. And maybe she did, Ania thought. Maybe they were lovers. If true, did it matter to her?

Memories of her intimate time with Liam flitted through her mind—and her body. Once it would have mattered very much to her if another female had any sort of claim on Liam Synar. If the possibility of bonding again with him still existed, Ania would have ordered the female glaring at both of them to leave him alone or face her death. But the possibility of a renewed intimate connection did not exist. Somehow she had failed to please Liam as a mate, even though she had never figured out what she had done wrong—or not done right.

Liam had refused to talk about his reasons for failing to return. It had all started with the first attack on their mating day, which Liam still attributed to an enemy he would not name.

Now it was like time had formed a circle. There had been another attack and Liam was being just a mysterious.

Of all her memories, the hardness of his face the last time they had argued about why he was staying away remained the strongest. Refusing to give her a genuine reason, Liam had finally admitted that he hadn’t known when, or even if, he would ever be returning. The rejection had been resolute and she had not contacted him to ask again.

They had since gone a whole year without any communication.

Even for someone as old and experienced in pain as she was, it had still been extremely difficult to give up hope. It had taken her a lot of time to actually accept that her relationship to Liam was indeed over.

Feeling remnants of old longings now was disruptive and not welcome at all. She would rather Liam just left again, no matter her fate. A year ago she had still longed to join him, but now she no longer desired to do so.

Now she had no idea how she was going to endure spending time on his ship.

Chapter 4

Onboard Liam’s ship and stashed out of sight, Ania felt depression settle on her as she unpacked, putting her meager belongings into the various compartments of the small room Liam had assigned her.

No—stop calling him Liam, she chastised herself. It was Synar or Captain Synar. Before they had left her parent’s house, he had asked her to refrain from using his given

name onboard. Ania saw no reason not to comply with his request regardless of how much it increased the emotional distance between them, or disrespected what they once were to each other.

Her former mate was making it very clear that even though he had helped her, she was no one important in his life. Why hadn’t he just said it straight out to her? It wasn’t like she hadn’t figured out their personal relationship was over.

There was a quiet knock on her door and Ania opened it to find a person she hadn’t expected to see so soon. Given her cool reception so far by the Liberator’s crew, she figured Captain Synar had issued an order for her to be shunned. She hadn’t expected Synar’s best friend to defy him.

“Greetings, Dorian Zade,” Ania said, bowing her head and closing her eyes. “It is a pleasure to see you once more. I saw you in the recovery crew who came to collect me, but you hardly spared me a look. I wasn’t even sure if you were going to be allowed to speak to me.”

“Greetings, Ania Looren, and apologies for my lack of acknowledgment until now. My interest earlier was in Liam and his reactions to what was happening. He was struggling to control—well, it is not my place to explain for him. Forgive me for rambling,” Dorian said, bowing his head, wishing he could embrace her. “I just wanted to see if you were getting settled and ask if you needed anything.”

Shaking her head to answer his question, Ania walked away from the open door to return to her unpacking. Dorian could make his own decision about coming in or not.

“Unless you came to offer me the information Liam seems unwilling to share yet, there is nothing more I need at the moment. My parents cried when I left as if I were dying instead of merely joining Liam—sorry—I mean, Captain Synar, on his ship. Even without my intuition working properly, it is quite obvious that the two of you have kept many secrets from me.”

“I swear by the Creators of All that peace will return to you soon,” Dorian said with conviction, stepping cautiously across her threshold even though the invitation to enter had not been given.

Ania turned her face away from the male she had taught to read her hundreds of years ago. She would never be able to hide her true feelings from Dorian, so it was just as well she did not currently feel the urge to do so. “Peace? I have not had peace since I met the one you still call your truest friend. Tell me, Dorian—did you ever regret setting aside your spiritual vows to take a life mate?”

Compassion flowed through Dorian for Ania’s emotional pain, which was much greater than Liam was allowing himself to know. He sent her all the vibrations of kindness the demon inside the woman would allow her to receive. Her sad facial expression eased a little as she absorbed the energy of his kind thoughts. The healing was surprisingly more than he had expected. Dorian silently thanked the Creators as he intuitively calculated the enormity of Ania’s pain. Seeing the extent of her personal devastation, his own role in helping cause it totally shamed him.

“Yes. I admit that after both times I mated I regretted setting aside my spiritual vows. Yet as contradictory as it seems, I never regretted a moment of the actual time I spent with my mates. It is a paradox that I often meditate on,” Dorian said, rubbing his chin with one hand. “Which reminds me of the second offer I wish to make to you. I have created a meditation space on the ship that you are welcome to use for your spiritual work. The room is guarded, so nothing will disturb you there.”

Ania turned away again and bowed her head. Of all her former students, she hated admitting her spiritual failures to Dorian Zade. He had once told her that her enlightenment was the ideal he sought to emulate. It was just one more reason to mourn what she had lost.

“I thank you for your consideration of my spiritual needs, but I no longer meditate. The moment I close my eyes, I fall instantly into a dreamless sleep. Projection is also impossible now. My spirit seems bound to my body in new ways, and true introspection also eludes me. I have come to see these as penalties. They are the price I paid for rescinding my vows and mating, though it only happened after Liam left for good. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is that eight hundred years of my life are gone.”

“Of course it matters, Ania. Everything you feel matters. My spirit grieves for your spirit’s pain,” Dorian told her, coming fully into the room and easing the door partially closed behind him. “May I touch you to read you?”

“No one has touched me but my mother and father in a long time, Dorian. You may try, but do not be disheartened at the absence of my spirit. My parents say it is like I am only a shell of who I once was.”

Dorian walked to Ania and placed his hands on her arms. He felt the dark energy pushing back on him, but he sent only compassion and understanding into her body. To his pleasure, Ania closed her eyes and breathed out raggedly.

Amazed, Dorian felt the demon within her step aside and relinquish his hold enough to let Ania be comforted. He thanked the entity and immediately was shown an image of her spirit sleeping as if in a trance. It was sad, but also reassuring.

“I feel such an agony of longing all the time,” Ania whispered. “Why does all peace elude me, Dorian?”

Shame and guilt at her words enveloped him again. Dorian bent and touched his forehead to Ania’s, something rarely done by her people except by close mates. To match the third eye chakras was a very intimate experience for both Pleiadians and Sirens, yet he would hold nothing back from Ania Looren ever again that could help her genuinely heal. He was deeply sorry now that he had not forced Liam to do better by his mate.

“Close your eyes while I offer solace,” Dorian ordered, his voice a husky whisper in the near silent room.

Ania did as Dorian asked and felt his compassion warm her. It cleansed her body like a wave of full spectrum light passing over her. It was the first comfort she’d had in a long time. She whimpered at the relief, but refused to allow herself any further emotional displays. Tears hovered, but receded as she refused to let them fall.

Dorian felt both the demon and Ania ripple in relief. Extreme loneliness and fear emanated from both. It was most unexpected to learn that even the demon had missed Liam. There was obviously much his friend did not understand about the creature he’d inherited, as well as about the female he had mated.

Then unexpectedly, the Creators opened up Ania’s destiny to him with rolling images of what was to come. Knowing the demon could prevent him from seeing, Dorian had no time to

process his own shock. And there it all was—Ania’s most likely destiny suddenly laid out for him to read like most

would read a com search. It was both marvelous and more frightening than anything Dorian had intuited in his life before that moment. He had to clear both awe and fear from his throat in order to speak.

“There are great changes possible for you in the coming days, and many decisions to be made,” Dorian said carefully. “Know there are as many kinds of death as there are of life. Make choices that you can live with no matter how difficult they are for others to bear. And Ania. . .” His voice tapered off as he saw what Ania would become if she chose a certain path. The vision shook him as he held her. Did he dare reveal it?

“What do you see, Dorian? Is death a possibility?” “I’m sorry. The words to describe what I see will not come to my tongue at the moment, but

my instinct is that the Creators of All are the architects of these plans for you,” Dorian said solemnly, raising his head and opening his eyes. “I will selfishly ask you not to choose your own physical death regardless of how hard your new life seems.”

“My new life?” Ania repeated Dorian’s words as calmly as she could, though she felt anything but calm about them. Her new life, as he called it, was a trap from which she had found no escape for two years. Her frustration over that fact exceeded any emotion she could ever recall having before. “I have no life, Dorian. In all the ways that matter, I am already dead. I was dead to my mate when he left. Now I am dead to my parents as well.”

She made herself step away from the comforting touch of Dorian’s hands. It was hard to give it up because she could at least feel his sincere compassion. Most Pleiadians did not touch others routinely, and no one touched someone of her societal rank without express permission. It was Liam Synar who had changed her desire for even the most basic of physical contact—and almost from the first moment they had been introduced. What had she become because of the Norblade male who had abandoned her?

Ania shook her head as she stepped as far out of Dorian’s reach as she could get in the small space. She turned her face to his again, but there was no more comfort in it. His compassion only angered her now. It felt too much like pity.

“How much more death can there be for me, Dorian? I fear there is even too little of my spirit left for the Creators of All to want it, otherwise I would be gone from this life. Be wise and never sacrifice your spiritual vows for a mate again. It is not a good exchange.”

“All you say may feel true to you at the moment, yet you are still physically alive, Ania. Plus I saw all of you in the reading. Your spirit is still inside your body, just hidden away and sleeping until something awakens it. I have faith in the Creator’s plan, so I will meditate for you until you are able to do so for yourself again. Blessings on your continued long life, my great teacher. I serve you still.”

Ania snorted at Dorian’s declaration, but afterwards felt herself close to tears once more. Yes, teacher. She had been that once, though the details were like a story that happened to someone other than her.

Ania was tempted to demand more answers. If pressed, Dorian would probably tell her the secret Liam was hiding. But she couldn’t in good conscience ask Dorian to divide his loyalties between Synar and her. There was no choice but to wait for her former mate to decide to talk to her.

“Blessings on your continued long life as well,” Ania said finally, bowing her head to him again. More anger would not help. And she was grateful that Dorian cared. “Go in peace, Dorian.

I’m sure I’ll see you again shortly on a ship this size.” Dorian turned his body toward the door, but his face was still turned toward Ania, reluctant

to leave. Her head was bowed in even more defeat now than when he had entered the tiny cramped space where Synar had put her. He almost ran over the person in the doorway as he considered whether to stay or go. “Liam—pardon. I didn’t see you.”

“Why are you here?” Synar demanded. “I said Ambassador Looren was not to be disturbed at all today.”

“I am only here to help her get settled in, Captain. If you’ve come to see to your mate’s needs, I will gladly take my leave of her.”

Dorian’s irritation faded quickly. His formality had the desired effect of causing Liam more guilt than a thousand carefully chosen words might have. He almost never called him captain. Liam had never asked it of him.

“Dorian is not disturbing me anymore than you are, Captain Synar. He offered me vibrational solace and showed me kindness, as is the best gift of his people. His efforts were appreciated and quite within protocol for a ship’s counselor.”

Ania hoped her words covered her resentment for Dorian calling him her mate. She wasn’t going to allow Liam to know how much being on the ship, and near him again, was bothering her. She didn’t want to risk triggering Liam’s stubborn side, but she wasn’t going to let him dictate her actions either. They needed to reach a new understanding.

“Let’s get some uncomfortable business between us settled. I hereby officially request you, and your crew, to stop addressing me by a title you and I know I no longer hold. I claim the right be called Ania Looren only. I revoke all other names and titles.”

Ania hoped he realized “mate” was also one of the titles being revoked. It would save further confrontation.

Despite no forthcoming invitation, Synar walked by a glaring Dorian to enter the room, ignoring the warning look the older male bestowed on him as they passed each other. He probably owed Dorian an apology, but it would have to be offered later.

“As you wish,” Synar conceded, his gaze moving from Dorian’s retreating back to the female now mostly ignoring him. “I’ve been thinking of what would be a suitable role for you on the Liberator. Being a peace keeper on a ship is not so different from being an ambassador.”

“I probably no longer qualify for that either, but will abide by your decision while I am among your crew, Captain.”

Ania turned from her now completed task of unpacking to face him. Dorian, for all his greater size, did not fill up the small room as much as the Norblade male now standing way too near to her. She acknowledged her rising female awareness of him and set it aside.

“You said we would discuss what happened when I fell asleep during the inquiry. Is this a proper time?”

Synar looked at Ania in the crew uniform she had donned. All he could think of was how much she looked just like she did when he had met her. In her capacity as ambassador back then, Ania had come aboard his ship to be transported to a multi-planet counsel session. Though she had looked beautifully cold and unapproachable, he had become instantly ravenous to bond with her. The thought of Ania being with or belonging to another male was just as unbearable now as it had been then.

It was unfortunate that another male ultimately had claimed her, and worse that he had done so by Synar’s command. Yet no matter how loathsome the decision, he was no closer to being able to give Ania over to death now than when he’d sent Malachi into her the first time. And he

didn’t care how many planetary laws it broke. Every instinct he possessed still said the female in front of him had to live—whatever the cost.

“Do you require anything for your comfort?” Synar asked quietly, putting hands in his pockets to keep them off her. His strong need to touch her again surprised him.

“No. I require nothing more. My needs are even more simple now than when you used to know me.”

As she talked to him, Ania kept her gaze trained on the door, and her awareness off Synar’s escalating discomfort in her presence. She refused to worry about his mental state. What he felt was not her concern any longer.

“May I speak my truth to you, Synar?” “You may always speak your truth to me.” Ania didn’t believe he meant his words, but she continued anyway. “I feel an imperative need to discuss what happened during the inquiry. I want to know why I

am required to be on your ship when you so obviously do not wish me to be here. If you retain any respect for my former place in your life, I ask that you make your explanations of those things a priority. Dorian spoke of me having to make decisions soon. I feel compelled to obtain knowledge as soon as possible in order to prepare myself.”

“What did Dorian say about the future?” Synar demanded, stalling his response to her comments.

“Only kind and comforting things,” Ania answered sincerely, unwilling to fully disclose the details of her energy reading. “Dorian gave me his compassion. I had forgotten how nice it could be to be touched.”

Synar looked away, unable to hold Ania’s accusing gaze, while inside he secretly resented Dorian’s interference.

Dorian Zade’s offering of spiritual comfort is not what you resent, Liam, Malachi sent. You just don’t like that a Siren male was touching your female. You should have seen how happy he made her. Providing such comfort was beyond my ability. How could you leave a female who needed you that much?

Be silent, Synar ordered. You do not know my feelings on the matter. I’m not sure you do either, Malachi replied. Liam frowned. He wanted to touch Ania. He wanted to hold her. He wanted it now. Yet he

could not bring himself to embrace Ania knowing the demon was a witness to his desire. The idea that Malachi would be hearing everything, sharing everything, bothered Synar more than he could set aside.

Dorian had cautioned him when he first bonded with Ania that there was very little heat in the Pleiadian female for him. But he hadn’t needed his intuitive friend to know Ania’s physical desire was lukewarm. He had been very aware that after many centuries of setting aside the physical side of herself, Ania never had reached the point of being more than mildly aroused by their physical bonding.

Yet her lack of desire had not put him off from formally mating her. He had been convinced that Ania was all the mate he would ever want or need. While part of him had been irritated by her reticence, another part had considered her coolness a challenge. The first time they had actually shared a bonding vibration had rivaled the moment he’d earned his captain’s rank. Every experience after that first one eclipsed all others he’d shared with any female.

He had no regrets in mating Ania. His regrets were only about not stopping Conor’s men in time to really save her.

“I’m not upset that he helped you. Dorian just should have checked with me before he came to see you,” Synar said, knowing it wasn’t fair of him to hold such a view.

Ania turned away to keep him from seeing her irritation. “My friendship with Dorian is centuries older than you are. I will not allow it to be disrespected no matter what you think of me. My interactions with him are not your concern.”

“I am not talking about your friendship with Dorian. You are I are still mated, Ania. It is disrespectful to let another male touch you other than to render aide,” Synar declared, all but choking on the hypocrisy of his words. Irrational or not, he didn’t want Dorian touching her. In fact, he didn’t want any other male touching her. Ever.

“Your accusations are invalid since you and I are no longer mated, Synar. To pretend we are is an illusion that serves no one and I will not be a part of it. The last two years of pretending were quite enough, even in my long lifetime. Check your records. Our mating agreement has been formally severed.”

She had drafted the mating dissolution form the day Synar said he might never come back for her. After the commissioner announced Synar was still legally responsible for her, Ania had decided to move forward with the dissolution. Sending the form and getting the acceptance back in a mere instant had barely hurt at all. It had seemed the only logical thing left to do to end a relationship that was over in every other way.

“I have seen no dissolution notification,” Synar said, a bit shocked that Ania would take such an official action without first informing him of her intent to do so.

Then he found himself morbidly wondering how the Pleiadians could accept a formal dissolution of their mating if they no longer considered her a live entity. Bureaucracy was always confusing, no matter how advanced the planet. By Pleiadian laws, he owned Ania’s body, if not the spirit within it now glaring at him. Coming out of his musings over the matter, Synar realized he’d been staring the whole time and swallowed hard at the anger radiating from her.

“Why did you feel the need to dissolve our arrangement after all this time? Is there someone else you wish to mate?”

Ania shook back her hair. If there had been another male, she would not have waited until now to dissolve it.

“My bonding availability is no longer your concern. I simply refuse to deceive any creature deliberately, even those of your crew that I do not yet know. While I packed at my parent’s house, I filed the dissolution form. It was acknowledged instantly. Trust me, our separation is legally, as well as spiritually, real. Isn’t that why you put me in my own space?”

Ignoring Ania’s angry pronouncement, and not ready to discuss their sleeping quarters, Synar turned his attention from the technical details to the bigger issue he needed to understand.

“What else do you know about the outcome of your inquiry?” Ania turned her back to him and pretended a great interest in the contents of her room. It kept

her anger from escalating to a point of wanting to attack him. “The details were not published before we left. The best of my intuition has been stripped

from me in the last two years. But what knowing I do possess tells me you have my answers. I am being as patient as I can be in the circumstances, Synar. I want to know what is going on.”

Curse Malachi, Synar decided. He was behind Ania knowing. He was supposed to be suppressing her awareness. Was the demon truly so determined to shed Ania’s body that he would hasten their confrontation? There was no available host body on the ship for the demon to use in place of hers. If Ania chose her death, Malachi would have to go into the amulet. In the amulet would be nothing but a void. So what could Malachi be planning?

I am planning to get the truth out so we can all move forward. The female and I are both weary of the secrecy. And yes—I would risk the Creator’s wrath to tell her myself. I obeyed you without question while we were apart, but I am out of patience as well, Liam. Do what is right and tell your mate the truth, Malachi ordered.

I will not accept her death as an option. You will remain in Ania until I say otherwise, Liam declared.

How is it that you know so little about the female you mated? Her spirit is ancient and weary of life’s constant struggle. You took away her primary reason to want to live longer when you left her. She never got over you, Malachi declared in return.

Synar resisted for a few moments more, hating to admit that Malachi’s communication about Ania was reassuring, even if accompanied by a threat.

“Your indecision is energetically depressing. Are you planning to make me wait another two years to know what has come to pass?” Ania demanded.

“No. You’re right. No more waiting. We will meet in the briefing room after the evening meal. What I have to say will not be a comfortable revelation for either of us, but. . .you have a right to know.”

“Thank you, Synar. I wish only to know the truth that belongs to me.” She bowed her head respectfully, but not before she watched Synar flinch from her words. Then Ania watched him leave as abruptly as he had arrived.

Feeling a fluttering inside her again, she rubbed a hand over her midsection to soothe it. Anxiety and stress were steady companions lately. She was tired of feeling so emotionally fragile. It was not at all how she thought of herself.

Chapter 5

“All I’m saying is that it’s good to have another female on the ship. Ambassador Looren is just as alluring as she always was,” Chiang said with a shrug, grinning at his dinner companion. “Shades of Kellnor, I don’t know how the Captain was able to leave that fine-looking female wasting away on her planet while he lived like a monk on the ship.”

“I’ve been wondering the same thing myself, but I wondered it way before I saw his female,” Gwen said on a laugh, shrugging as well. “It’s strange, but I guess Synar had his reasons.”

Chiang laughed at his memories. “The captain was not always so strange about his mate. I was serving with him when they met. She showed no interest, but he pursued her anyway. Perhaps I should keep my distance from her. A smart male should probably be afraid of a female capable of corrupting someone as rational as Synar.”

Her loyalty to Synar prompted her glare at Chiang more than any concern for Ania Looren’s reputation. Synar was the one who had put his mate in a room other than his. Who could blame the crew for assuming the dissolution rumors were true?

“I didn’t bring my weapon, but I will kick your sorry Greggor ass if you keep insulting the captain’s wife—ex-wife—or whatever she is to him now. Are we clear on that, Lieutenant Chiang?”

“Absolutely, Commander. But I thought you appreciated my sorry ass. In fact, I distinctly remember you appreciating it for almost half a sleep cycle just a few days ago.”

Gwen laughed at his teasing. She couldn’t help it. Nor could she say it wasn’t true. “You’re right. Chiang. I like your ass just fine. It’s your mouth that’s the problem. Guess I’d

have to cut out your split tongue instead.” “If you ever let me use it for something other than talking, I could change your attitude,”

Chiang said. Gwen smiled as she finished her food. It turned to a grimace when Chiang stuck out his split

tongue, waving each side at her. Mock shivering in disgust, Gwen snorted at his offer. “I will never let anyone do that, especially not a genetic mutant like you, Chiang.”

“How is a Greggor mutant worse than a Earthling hybrid? Say you love me—you know you do,” Chiang teased.

They had been bonding partners for a while, but Chiang was careful not to cross the line when Gwen was in commander mode. She was much more entertaining and pleasurable than Calliope, who was the only other unmated female on the ship. Calliope didn’t have much personality, or seem to care much about what she did or with whom. Gwen at least had emotional reactions, even if she did often fantasize about someone else during her bonding time with him.

Unfortunately, Gwen Jet was not going to be his to play with for much longer. His intuition had its basis in empathy, but now and again he got a flash of the future. The male Gwen Jet was meant for was about to stake a claim to her. Chiang could see it coming, just not when. He hoped he got to have one more bonding experience with her first.

“Maybe Ambassador Looren might feel differently about my talented tongue. Rumor around the ship is that she legally dissolved her mating agreement with the captain. I figure it’s true since she has her own private sleep space. Do you think that means she might be available for bonding?”

Chiang shrugged at Gwen’s frown. He was only asking a question that he knew was on every

male’s mind. The ship was too small not to know such things. Anything passing through the Liberator’s public com was eligible as a topic for evening meal conversation.

Though she probably should have chastised Chiang for his disrespect, she snickered instead. Chiang’s interest in Synar’s female was amusing. Luckily, she was not the least bit jealous. She was just cautious about being sucked into the Liberator’s gossip system, having been the subject of it often enough to become wary.

“Yes, I heard the ambassador filed papers right before we left Pleiades, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up about eventually bedding that female if I were you. Pleiadians don’t bond any more than they have to because they think it corrupts their spiritual life. She’s not going to be into your kind of free love recreation, Chiang.”

“Too bad,” Chiang said as sadly as he could. “She’s so cool looking. I wonder what she’s like in heat.”

“Don’t engineers study planetary cultures in academy? Females from Pleiades don’t allow themselves to enjoy heat cycles. They shun going into heat until they are ready to conceive, and then they cry the whole time they’re doing the deed.”

“So? It would not be my first time with a weeping female. I am well trained in soothing. You know that, Lubita,” Chiang said softly.

He couldn’t help but feel pleased when the tough female across from him actually blushed. “Yeah-yeah. You excel at sex. Were you that desperate for a compliment? Quit teasing me.”

Gwen looked at a grinning Chiang with disgust, mostly because he had the right to brag. Chiang was a considerate lover. Not all Greggors were.

“Sex is a cold word for what we have shared. It sounds like the description of a body function. Bonding at least sounds like there are two entities involved,” Chiang complained, fighting not to laugh at Gwen’s exasperated sigh.

“Sorry for my slang. I know everyone thinks Earthlings calling it sex makes it less sacred. Hell, maybe it’s true, but I’m not trying to be disrespectful to what we have shared.”

“I’m not offended. You’ll always be my favorite female, Commander. I’m not truly lusting after anyone else, just merely pointing out that more unmated females are needed on the Liberator. We don’t visit friendly planets very often.”

Chiang was pleased when Gwen laughed and swore at him, even though he noticed Lieutenant Zade frowning in their direction the whole time. Zade no longer hid his disapproving glares from him which confirmed what he had seen in his visions. He truly would miss bonding with Gwen, but knew a Siren male never shared any female he went to the trouble to publicly claim.

Gwen Jet could be a suitable mate, Chiang supposed, but he didn’t see her going along with Zade’s antiquated ideas about belonging to him for the rest of her natural life. That Zade would outlive her was a given, but it was the total ownership Sirens desired that was the real obstacle.

Zade was in for a surprising fight if he tried to force the half Earthling, half Thelorian female to do anything she didn’t want to do. Gwen was resistant to anyone else being in control, and fierce when her mind was set. Both traits served her well in leadership, but were parts of her Chiang didn’t think Zade had ever really acknowledged.

If Gwen were less stubborn about using her intuitive skills, that voice within would be warning her about Zade’s energy slowly entwining itself with hers. Helios knew he couldn’t help, no matter what he saw coming, because it would mean his death. Sirens, especially older ones like Zade, were not that open-minded about other males interfering in their love life, probably doubly true for former bonding partners.

No. There was simply nothing left for him except to let go of his association with Gwen as gracefully as he could. Chiang smiled and promised himself to meditate on it until he reached full acceptance. He would sincerely miss his time with her though.

“I honor you and have valued our time together, Gwen Jet. Go in peace for the rest of your life’s journey. No matter what happens in our futures, know that I will always be your friend.”

“What’s up with the poetic send-off today, Chiang? Are we breaking up? Okay—fine. Hell, I was tired of you anyway. I honor you too, Chiang of Greggor. Go in peace for the rest of your life’s journey,” Gwen joked, sounding as stuffy as possible as she returned the formal goodbye. “But seriously, I don’t think I’ll be going anywhere without you anytime soon. There are Peace Alliance shuttles larger than the Liberator.”

“I misspoke. I will still see you around the ship,” Chiang clarified, smiling wider at her teasing. “We just won’t be able to bond anymore. If you used your intuitive mind more often, you could see these things for yourself. It might help you be better prepared to deal with the changes that are coming for all of us.”

Gwen snorted. “Will you stop lecturing me about that intuition crap? You sound like Zade. The only future I care about is the next two revolutions on the ship’s timekeeper and the briefing with the Captain’s wife—I mean ex-wife or ex-mate—hell. . .whatever term you want to use for her.”

“That may well be how the change begins,” Chiang mused, nodding at her clueless expression. Then he laughed. At the very least, Gwen’s total surprise about Zade would be entertaining to watch.

“May the Creators of All guide your destiny, my sweet Earthling. Since you don’t want to mentally prepare, you may be in for a rougher ride than I could ever give you. I hope you find your happiness.”

“Well you might be in for a rough ride yourself, if I get out of this damn meeting with Synar and his ex-wife in time,” Gwen teased, enjoying Chiang’s pleased male laughter as she rose. “I need to go take care of some pesky body things before I join them. See you later.”

Chiang lifted a hand to wave as he watched her go. After Gwen had disappeared from sight, Chiang looked across the dining hall, met

Lieutenant Zade’s questioning stare, and bowed his head respectfully. The other male’s eyes widened in surprise at his concession, but he managed to hold in his amusement.

Most underestimated him and his intuitive gifts, and Chiang preferred to keep it so. He liked being an engineer. It was mindless work that soothed his spirit and kept his hands occupied with productive tasks. Intuition was rarely needed in repairing the Liberator’s mechanical parts. That didn’t mean he walked around in denial about all the other happenings on the ship.

Part of him liked Gwen enough to want to warn her about Zade’s intentions. But the other part wisely knew after his almost century and a half of life, that each person’s journey was his own. You had to be very careful informing someone about their possibilities, especially when they didn’t want to hear.

It had always seemed to him that Gwen never wanted to think of anything but the present, which was a good trait in a temporary bonding companion. Though wicked thoughts of her made him smile, Chiang refused to mourn the loss.

They had had their time together. Now it was over. They would both move on. He had every confidence that Gwen would learn to value her intuition eventually. Who knew

what the future truly held? All destiny readings were no more than momentary flashes of possibilities.

Still grinning over the Siren’s growing jealousy of him, Chiang rose to return to his station, feeling Zade’s disapproving gaze following him out of the dining hall.

Chapter 6

“Captain, would you like me to locate Lieutenant Zade?” “That won’t be necessary, Commander. He is making some spiritual preparations for this

meeting. Such matters are not precise. We will allow Dorian the time he needs and proceed when he arrives.” And I will put the inevitable off for a few more minutes, Synar thought.

When Dorian finally walked in, Gwen thought the very air seemed to be sucked toward him as well as the attention of everyone in the room.

“I apologize for my lack of timekeeping,” Dorian said, addressing everyone but keeping his gaze mostly fixed across the room. “I meditated for you, Ania. I asked for you to receive peace.”

Gwen watched the still standing Ania Looren—not Ambassador Looren, she’d been admonished—turn and bow her head respectfully to Zade in reply. The look that passed between them put her on full alert and brought her gaze back to her suddenly very nervous captain. She heard Synar clear his throat to speak.

“Engage log. Record time and entire discussion, video and audio. Witnesses to this discussion are Lieutenant Dorian Zade, Spiritual Counselor, and Commander Gwen Jet, First Mate. Also present are Ambass—strike that. Also present are Ania Looren, ship’s Peace Keeper, and Captain Liam Synar. Subject of discussion is. . .”

Synar stopped as Ania turned her gaze from the void of space outside the Liberator’s view port and back to him. She walked slowly to the conference table and sat down opposite his seat. He had no choice but to look directly into her eyes as he finished the entry.

“I am beyond ready to hear this, Synar. Please continue.” Ania folded her hands in her lap, trying to quell the rising anxiety threatening to overtake her. The cramps were almost unbearable. It was all she could do not to call out in pain.

“The subject of this discussion is my regretful revelation to Ania Looren that her body is being used to host a demon called Malachi.” The words came out in a rush, his declaration echoing on the air between them as he finished.

Ania shook her head and closed her eyes at Synar’s words, searching for the truth that seemed to be swirling inside her. The fluttering and cramping increased along with the pressure of her life force rushing around chaotically inside her physical form. A demon? She carried a demon inside her? How could she not have known? And to think she had compared the feelings within to carrying a child.

“This is the secret you’ve been keeping from me? That I am being used to host a demon?” Ania repeated his words, numb with shock. “How did this come to be the truth?” she demanded, her gaze boring into the male facing her.

Synar looked away, unable to hold Ania’s accusing gaze while he explained. “On our mating day, we were attacked by a group of mercenaries who hoped to capture the demon’s host and gain control over his power. The host at that time was. . .”

“. . . First Mate Jonas Tangier,” Ania said suddenly, surprising all of them, including herself, when her mind suddenly filled with a perfect image of the deceased male. That kind of absolute intuitive knowing hadn’t happened to her in a very, very long time. She felt a stirring inside her gut again, an almost joyous moment of acknowledgement. The demon must have liked Jonas. Yes. She felt his affection for the male.

Ania stood, walking away from the table and from Synar. How could she have missed all the indicators of demonic possession? The fluttering was

always followed by a sense of dread. Her loss of self. Her utter aloneness. Her spirit had simply refused to acknowledge it—or maybe the demon refused to acknowledge her spirit. Either way she was caught between two kinds of spiritual death.

Ania turned back to Synar and cleared her throat. “Am I right, Synar?” “Yes. Jonas was Malachi’s former host,” Synar said quietly, holding her inquisitive gaze now

that the first shock had passed. “The demon was able to subdue the attackers, but not before Jonas’s body was killed. During the attack, your body was critically wounded to the point of death. The demon went into you and basically saved your life by lending you his. It is the arrangement he has with his hosts.”

“So the demon just left Jonas’s dead body and came into my dying body because I was available and unable to prevent his possession?” Ania asked, reality starting to set in at last. “I am aware of the sacred contracts, Synar. That’s not how it works.”

Her mind raced now with the terrible knowledge. No wonder meditation was impossible. The dark entity within her likely wouldn’t let her commune with the Creators who imprisoned it. She hadn’t seen a demon in several centuries, but she remembered them. In fact, she had a healthy respect for their fate. “What kind of demon do I carry?”

“Malachi is a linked demon and unable to act, beyond small ways, of his own accord. And to answer your previous question—Malachi’s master ordered him into your body,” Synar admitted at last.

Ania drew in a breath, mostly to hold in her scream. “So who is the master? More to the point—where is the master now since I am forever linked to both? I have a right to face him.”

Hearing Commander Jet draw in a sharp breath at her question, Ania turned to the fierce, younger female who was now swearing softly. She watched Dorian place a restraining hand on the female’s arm. Synar’s first mate had obviously figured it out, and seemed quite angry about Ania not knowing. What was that about?

Following the female’s glare, Ania’s gaze ended as she stared in disbelief at Synar’s unrepentant face. Synar? No. No—it couldn’t be. Surely Liam Synar had not mated her without telling her he was a demon master?

But as she studied his tight jaw and lips pressed in a single thin line, she felt the truth sweep though her life force with absolute surety. The Norblade male sitting calmly at his ship’s conference table had breached her centuries-old chaste body, and then given it over to his demon servant as a home. As her formal mate, Synar would have been fully exercising his rights to do with her dying body as he wished. No one would have dared stop him.

Still—she could scarcely take it in. Liam Synar knew her, knew what she was, what she believed. She had spent over eight hundred years becoming enlightened. He should have known she would never want to be used for such a vile purpose, no matter the loss of her life.

Ignoring Synar’s concerned gaze on her, Ania walked across the room until a solid mass of blue wall blocked further exit. Panic rose in her and along with it a primal scream, her survival mechanisms kicking in at last. She opened her mouth to call out in pain, but only an eerie panicked silence escaped.

A cramp hit her midsection with the force of a fist, but she knew what it was now. A demon lives within me. The thought angered her beyond anything she had felt in hundreds of years. Needing some outlet for her rage, she drew back her fist and rammed it forward, blasting

through three layers of wall as if it were nothing. Pulling her sore hand back, she studied it like a child studies something it doesn’t understand. It had been a bit painful, but mere moments later

there wasn’t a single scratch on her to indicate the effort. Ania turned slowly around and faced the male who had condemned her spirit. She saw a

male whose face was full of a steely determination that mocked her anger, not to mention her pain.

Pleiadians lived for thousands of years. No wonder her stoic parents had been crying. They knew as well. Everyone had known but her, and only because Synar hadn’t wanted her to know. He probably had ordered the demon to keep her confused on matters. Did he really hate her so much?

“You purposely put something vile and evil inside me. Why, Liam? You knew my beliefs. Why did you not honor them and let me die? I was your mate. You owed me your honor.”

She clutched at her stomach and bent with the pain as the demon struggled within her, punishing her for her words, maybe even for her thoughts. Defying the darkness living inside, she pulled herself straight, moving out of reach just as Synar lunged from the chair. “Stay away. Do not touch me.”

“I put Malachi inside you because I could not watch you die when I had the power to save you.” Saying it aloud was such a great relief that Synar wanted to sink to the floor at Ania’s feet.

Ania backed away from him further. Power to save her, Liam said. It was always about power. Despair wrapped around her like a cloak. “But don’t you see? What you have done to me—this is death. The laser blast I took for you did not hurt this much. I would gladly have died.”

She turned away then, clenching her hands into fists. Then suddenly, she was whirling back to confront him, the anger refusing to be held inside any longer.

“Your rejection of me as your mate felt like death too, Liam Synar. I figured it was divine punishment for the mistake I made agreeing to become your mate in the first place. But how could you hide this kind of truth from me? The demon used me to kill three other beings, and I have no memory of it. Your actions in giving me to him were both foolish and selfish.”

“Aye—they were selfish,” Synar agreed, still sure his pain was no less than Ania’s. He reached out to grab her chin, only to have his hand violently knocked away. The rejection of his touch hurt more than he’d expected. “I would do the same thing again to extend your life. Malachi is vicious when provoked, but he is always good to his hosts. He has been in my family almost since he was turned to a demon. Being his master is not my choice. You must try to understand the situation from my perspective.”

Ania sneered. “Your perspective? I well see your perspective. You are a spoiled child seeking to be forgiven for what you consider a small exercise of your will over mine. What do you know of the demon’s kind? I specifically chose not to follow the path of Malachi’s species. I dedicated myself to living a different life.”

“Can you not see that I did this for your good?” Synar demanded. “No. I cannot. Remove the demon from me at once and let my body die, Synar.” “No—at least, not yet. I cannot refuse you forever, but I also cannot risk the demon not

having a host at this time. No action can be taken until another host can be found.” His stomach heaved at the thought of Ania lifeless, never to be reanimated. Ania closed her eyes and fought to calm the turmoil inside her. Getting angrier would solve

nothing, but how could she be calm? Now even the memories of the caring she had once felt from him were meaningless.

Liam Synar was a stranger. Worse, she realized he had always been one, even the day she mated him.

“How did what we found together become this unholy alliance?” Ania asked. “I understand your point of view, and yet I will continue to value your physical life until

other arrangements can be made,” Synar said, his voice husky with shame, but also full of his determination to adhere to what he was saying.

From the depths of her, Ania felt the demon offer up several centuries’ worth of old memories. In them she saw a passionate, risk-taking female who had warred until her whole culture had collectively devoted itself to peace. She had all but forgotten herself as a young girl not even a century old, forgotten that it had been the warrior who had come first.

Then just as clearly, she saw why the demon had chosen that precise moment to give those memories back to her. Synar was treating her like an enemy treats a prisoner of war, like an object to be used as he saw fit. He held both their lives in his control, but perhaps it didn’t have to be like that. By the will of the Creators, she had never been anyone’s prisoner for long.

Ania felt the demon fluttering in approval at her rebellion, the feeling in her gut so familiar that she wondered why she had not connected to it before.

“You may be master of the Demon of Synar, but you will never be my master, Liam. One day soon I will take back control of the destiny you have exploited for your own purposes. Neither you, nor your demon, will stop me. This is my new vow to you and replaces all former ones I have ever made.”

Ania took a step toward Liam, unsurprised when he backed away. Her skin felt on fire. Her eyes burned in her head. And her body readied itself for defense against her false protector.

“Between us now there can be no peace. You should be grateful you are not more my enemy or your life would be forfeit as well. Ai lee na cum silane.”

Synar paled at her words, spoken adeptly in the ancient tongue that all creatures feared. How did Ania know it so well? The remaining energy remnants of Ania’s compassion for him were suddenly wrenched away as he stood meeting her angry glare. His demon-possessed mate had just shut him out of her spirit and taken back her energy. The personal distance between them now was worse than any he had created by leaving her alone so long. Some invisible cord between them had been cut, and before him stood an angry stranger.

Ania turned her back on the male who had done this to her to face another she thought had been a friend. Her illusion of Dorian’s loyalty to her was gone now. It was difficult to choose whose betrayal hurt worse. She would have killed her physical body by her own hand if the demon would have allowed it.

“You knew this was done to me and yet you said nothing. Despite Liam’s insistence that he is the demon’s master, it’s obvious he has little understanding. But you know, Dorian Zade. You have betrayed my trust and a friendship of many centuries. For what gain, I ask you now?”

“Perfect clarity was denied to me in this matter except for one fact, Ania. It was not your destiny to die that day. I believed that as well.” Dorian’s heart was saddened by his old friend’s reaction, even though he had seen how deeply she would be hurt. The reality was more painful than his vision. “Liam’s guilt made him a coward. My affection for you both made me one as well in choosing whose trust to risk losing. I was waiting for the will of the Creators. I believe that is what is happening now.”

Ania laughed bitterly and lifted her arms. “Arrogant males abound across all species, which is why I never sought to align with one.

You and Liam are both fools as well as cowards. Raging fires of Helios, Dorian. What gives you or Synar the right to determine anyone’s destiny but your own? My life while I lived freely was given over to easing the pain and suffering of all creatures, not in increasing the risk of harm to

them. I could have destroyed all the people on my planet because of you and Synar.” “I could not control what was done to you, neither the attack nor Liam’s actions to save you.

It was also not my place to make the decision for Liam to tell you his truth,” Dorian argued, trying in vain to defend his choice. “Liam ordered the demon to protect you and do no harm. From my observations, this has come to pass. The Greggors were the exception.”

“Aye. The Greggors deserved to die. Maybe others do as well.” She swung back to Synar who was staring at her in shock, muttering streams of words that

had both males calling her name in alarm. “Ania! Stop cursing us,” Dorian ordered, watching the Khalsa warrior awaken from her

centuries-old sleep. He was more afraid than anyone in the room because the last thing any of them needed was the demon to share that power in her. Finally he understood what his loyalty to Liam had cost his teacher and friend. “Okay, I was wrong. Liam was wrong. But do not condemn us with your words. There are many on the Liberator who do not deserve your wrath.”

“Fine, but now do you see?” Ania demanded. “The demon could have at any point used my power to curse and kill as much as he used his own. Over the centuries I made myself a healer, an instrument of good. Against my will, Synar made me an instrument of evil again. Now I am a bringer of mass destruction and death, not just an individual assassin. I will not allow my physical body to be used in such a manner.”

She looked between the two males who were staring at her. “One way or the other, with or without anyone’s permission, I will have my death and cease to feed the demon.”

Ania turned and left the room, not waiting to be dismissed from the meeting. Who would stop her? Power rose within her and the demon fluttered in approval.

For the second time in her life, she knew what it was to hate herself.

***

After Ania left, Synar went back to his chair. He sat heavily and put his face into his hands trying to escape the scenes playing over and over in his head. He had known Ania could use many ancient words of power to heal. Most Pleiadians could. How foolish of him not to ever wonder if she also knew the ones to curse and destroy.

Only certain generations of Pleiadians were said to have had that kind of training and the personal power required to manifest their will. It was also said that those who wielded the ancient words paid a high price for doing so. He had never really thought of Ania’s age or her status on her planet, never really considered that an advanced healer like her would ever have studied the darker side of the power arts.

Well, now he knew. But it was too late to change what he had done. If his father had still been alive, Bogdan would have said it was Synar’s punishment to have

to face his mistake. Ania had certainly raised his awareness about the danger she posed to everyone. He would never leave her or the demon unattended again.

Gwen eventually made herself stop staring at Synar with his face still hidden in his hands. She looked away to give him privacy for his melt-down. Personally, she didn’t think that the demon was the biggest problem for Ania Looren. It was the ongoing deceit that rankled most.

Gwen would have wanted to kill Synar too. Evidently, Zade thought Ania had the skills to do it. Gwen didn’t see how the smaller, paler female could ever really hurt anyone. Her words might have some dark magic to them, but what could she do on a ship? Take them all down to guarantee her own death? Somehow that just didn’t seem like what the cool blonde would do.

Though she fought it for a short while, Gwen ended up looking into Dorian Zade’s troubled face. He didn’t look much better than Synar did, but all Zade had done was choose to support

one friend over the other. Without stopping to consider the compulsion she followed, Gwen put out a hand and laid it on top of one of Zade’s, bringing his surprised gaze to her.

“Stop the pity party, Lieutenant. I would have done what Captain Synar did to save his wife, and I would have kept silent like you did while Synar worked things out. This is a situation where there was never going to be a good enough solution for everyone involved.”

“Indeed. I see that clearly now,” Dorian said. “Look—Ania Looren is justifiably angry to find out the truth in such a bad way. But there is

a core of extreme good in her despite the demon’s presence. That inner goodness will help her survive this. She’s not going to hurt the ship or the crew. You told me to use my intuition. Well, damn it—that’s what it’s telling me.”

Dorian lifted the hand Gwen wasn’t holding to her cheek, wondering why he had held back his desire from her for so long. Her honesty was refreshing. Her compassion raw and sincere. He had been as big a fool as Liam. “From the mouth of the infant among us comes the hope that might wash away the lies and deceit. Blessings on your life, Gwen Jet. Thank you for your compassion today.”

“Come on, Dorian. You know I hate that formal crap,” Gwen said gently, not conscious she had used his given name in her teasing admonishment until she heard it leave her mouth.

Gwen watched him smile as he bowed his head to her respectfully even though her words had not been nice. She smiled before turning back to study Synar. Later she would let herself think about how appealing Zade was when he was being nice to her, but there was no time at the moment to enjoy being female.

“Synar? Can the demon harm without you ordering it to?” Synar didn’t look at Gwen, but he answered. His commander had a right to know. “Malachi

is forced by divine contract to obey me, or what is left of him will be sent to oblivion without interaction with any creature. Sentient life is about the connections we make, which is a truth even for demons. Without a host, they have no life, so in general they are mostly well-behaved.”

“Good to know I won’t be risking my life to get involved then. I’ll let Ania Looren cool down for a bit, and then I’ll go see how she’s coming to terms with her new awareness about her situation. I’ll report back to you as soon as I can. It will most likely be tomorrow.”

Synar’s only answer was a nod. He could only be grateful for Gwen’s support. “Close discussion and seal log,” he ordered. Gwen rose and walked to the door. She heard Dorian chastising Synar before it was fully

closed behind her.

Chapter 7

Ania heard the rapid knock but ignored it, keeping her eyes fixed on the small portable comp unit built into the desk. She certainly had no wish to speak to anyone else today.

“Find all content concerning demon masters and demon hosts. Cross reference with all other symbiotic relationships between demons and any sentient being on any planet registered with the Peace Alliance. Add search terms: power, calling out, and commands. If there is room in the folder to store more, also find any myths or legends about demon hosts controlling demons. Seal research under a private log for Ania Looren and require voice access authorization to open. Process and go to dark screen.”

“Processing,” the comp unit reported. “Dark screen engaging shortly.” The knock at the door grew louder. Ania rose from her seat and walked to face whoever was

behind the pounding. She sincerely hoped it wasn’t Dorian or Synar coming to apologize. Helios would freeze now before she allowed what was left of her will to bend to anyone’s ever again—demon or corporeal being. Synar wasn’t the only person with a long buried secret, and hers was awake and ready to help her.

Ania opened the door with warrior eyes blazing at a startled Commander Jet, who took a step back in alarm.

“Hi, I just—I just wanted to come by to ch—check on you.” Gwen stammered her hello, her skin rippling with a feeling almost resembling fear. She resolutely pushed the feeling away and lifted her chin because it was preposterous to be afraid of the shorter, cool blonde with eyes the color of the Earth’s sky. Unable to stop all reaction, Gwen rubbed her arms. She was not pleased when Ania snorted in derision and turned to walk away, leaving her standing where she was. While the older female’s greeting lacked any welcome, Gwen decided to take the open door as a good sign.

“Liam Synar is yours,” Ania announced, not turning around. “If you are here to seek permission to bond with him, you do not need it from me. We are officially unmated. I regret ever setting eyes on him.”

Gwen laughed. She had been expecting many things. Outright jealousy wasn’t one of them. “To the best of my knowledge, Synar hasn’t done anything with any female in the whole two

years I’ve known him, not even when we took the crew to visit the Sirens of Rylen. The almost comatose Zade even got off the ship then, but Synar didn’t. I won’t lie and say I wasn’t curious why.”

Gwen walked across the threshold and inside the room when it was obvious she wasn’t going to be invited. “Learning of your existence has sort of answered most of my questions.”

Deciding to be cautious given her initial reaction to Ania, she only partially closed the door behind her. She wanted an escape route just in case the obviously still angry female lost it later. In her fifteen years serving the Peace Alliance, Gwen had seen her share of dangerous creatures, and Ania had the look of someone on the edge.

“If you think what Synar does still matters to me, I assure you it does not,” Ania said. “Okay. But I’m not sharing information about Synar’s bonding habits to make friends,”

Gwen said with a shrug, though it wasn’t completely true. “It’s a waste of breath to lie to an intuitive, Commander. Your words do not match your

feelings of possession about Synar,” Ania said, not willing to play games. The young commander wasn’t exactly lying, but she was fabricating her reality to serve her own purposes.

Ania was sick of deceit and wanted no more. “Well I wouldn’t call what I feel about Synar possession exactly. It surprises me you’re

throwing that word around in speech, given what you just found out about yourself.” Gwen risked the insult because it sounded more like her than the cautious questioning she had been trying to do. “My feelings about Synar are that of a pissed-off—I mean, a disgruntled—First Mate who feared for the ship and crew’s safety all damn day while her captain took time out to have a personal meltdown. If you’re planning to have one as well, I’d just as soon know about it. I’ve got my hands full here.”

Ania took a full minute to search the Earthling’s energy for any signs of trickery, but all she saw was evidence of Commander Jet’s concerns about the crew, even if some of it was misplaced. She sighed heavily in resignation, ashamed of herself for arguing, and of her hurt feelings. Her outburst in the conference had no doubt alarmed the commander further. “I concede your right to be concerned, and apologize for my comments. Synar could have avoided this situation by telling me the truth when it happened.”

“Agreed. I can’t say much more about him without risking disloyalty,” Gwen continued, keeping her voice businesslike for now. “For the record, Synar may look like a prime male, especially when he smiles, but I prefer the ones who are actually interested in me. There are enough unmated males on the Liberator that I don’t have to chase reluctant ones. I also don’t sleep with officers who outrank me.”

Ania laughed harshly and crossed her arms. “Maybe Synar will be more interested in bonding now that our mating contract is officially severed.”

Gwen spoke softly, but firmly, making sure the female heard the sincerity in her voice. “I doubt it. He considers himself committed to you. And not to brag about my bonding habits, but I’m happy with the three males I’m enjoying now.”

Ania dropped her arms and sank down into her desk chair, ashamed of herself for bringing the matter up again. What did Synar’s bonding habits matter to her? She could barely remember being intimate with him. And she shouldn’t spar verbally with Commander Jet just to practice her bravado.

“It serves no purpose to argue over Synar’s actions or lack of them. The past is done. I regret my words of anger again,” Ania said, bowing her head in apology.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself. Any female would have been angry. I think you’re doing pretty well considering the shock you’ve had today.”

“The worst day of my life was when I allowed Liam Synar to first touch my hand, because when it wasn’t abhorrent, I allowed him even more. Now I have his demon inside me where I once thought he might fill me with his child. One male in nine hundred years and it’s worked out worse than I ever imagined. I have no illusions left about bonding or mating, Commander.”

“Nine hundred years? Damn that’s a long time. Yeah, you’re pretty much a walking testimony to why I never let a male matter much to me,” Gwen said with grin. “I can take them or leave them—and I definitely enjoy being the one who decides.”

Ania shook her head. The obtuse female had no idea about Dorian. No idea what he was or what he could do, or how addicted she was going to become to the male who was just biding his time. She probably should warn her. Dorian deserved to have to fight this one. “We all have illusions to lose, Commander. Prepare yourself. Your reckoning is not far behind mine.”

“Yeah. So people keep saying,” Gwen said, picking up a stone from the desk where Ania sat. She tossed the stone from hand to hand while considered how much she admired the

Pleiadian’s directness and honesty. Ania Looren had weathered a big shock, but wasn’t lying

across her bed weeping about it. The female was upright, functional, and likely planning how she was going to handle things. The comp unit was obviously humming and working on something major. Gwen really would like to know what.

“I don’t trust intuition—mine or anyone else’s. I prefer dealing with what is in front of me and letting the future take care of itself.”

“I see. Then may you keep your positive attitude for the entirety of your life’s journey.” Ania repeated the blessing in the ancient tongue to give it more power. The words felt good, natural. She had forgotten.

“Is that Pleiadian? That blessing was kind of sarcastic, but I’m going to pretend you meant it. You’re not really going to ask Synar to kill you, are you?”

Gwen studied the Pleiadian female’s face, not missing the flash in her eyes. “No, asking Synar to kill me would be redundant, Commander. I just want him to let the rest

of me die. This shell you see sitting in the chair is not powered by me, but rather the demon. If I’m blessed one last time, the energy of my current body will join my spirit as it returns to the Creators of All.”

Ania leaned back in her chair to look up into the face of the female who was leaning a hip against her desk in blatant challenge. A wave of irritation came and she had to fight her urge to make Gwen Jet step away. She felt defensive, and combative. It had been a long time since she had had to deal with those kinds of instincts.

“You don’t seem like the kind of female who takes the easy way out of her problems. Was Synar a bad husband—I mean, mate?” Gwen asked, correcting her term.

“Bad and good are not terms that mean anything to a Pleiadian or to a Norblade. Synar said he had to leave and that he would return for me. Two years went by and he didn’t keep his word no matter how much I requested his return. Now he has finally come, but I find out he put a demon in me on our mating day. What more reasons do I need to be disappointed?”

“None I suppose, but at least Synar kept his mating vows. Males of any planet can be stupid, but most can’t find it in themselves to be that faithful,” Gwen said, trying to get Ania to follow her logic in hopes of easing her hurt feelings. “Frankly, I’ve been in awe of Synar’s faithfulness since he told me about you.”

Ania laughed softly, surprised she could laugh at all. “You are an Earthling, and bonding means different things when you are not enlightened. Synar and Dorian are irritating enough to make any logical female want to go live on a planet without males and bonding.”

Gwen laughed but secretly hoped she never felt that way. She liked bonding too much. “Maybe Synar has been feeling guilty that you got hurt. Or maybe he’s a bit fearful of the

combination of you and the demon.” She paused to see if her words had any effect, but she couldn’t tell. Ania Looren was pretty stoic. “Not that Synar would ever admit to feeling that way, but we’ve fought enough battles together for me to know what worry looks like on his face. I saw that look today when he couldn’t bring himself to tell me he was the demon master. Now I figure Synar couldn’t admit it to me until he’d finally gotten up the nerve to admit it to you.”

“Yes, but he mated me without disclosing the fact. That trumps other confessions. Until he agrees to allow my death, I can only consider Synar to be my enemy,” Ania said, not softening the statement. “It is a truth that I could have brought great harm to everyone I knew. I can only be thankful that a mere three creatures were killed without my awareness.”

“Yes, I read the report. Frankly, I was too curious not to after I saw Synar call out the demon at the tribunal hearing. Those males were killing and hurting your family. They deserved to die.”

“Agreed, Commander. But I don’t like that I had no say in my body being used without my

consent to accomplish those results.” “Look, I won’t say you don’t have the right to be upset with Synar, and I didn’t come to

fight about what your mate did or didn’t do right. I came to offer my friendship to you, such as it is. There aren’t a lot of females on the ship. Something tells me you and I could be good friends.”

“Commander, in nine hundred years, I’ve been on more ships than you’ve dreamed about yet. Your loyalty to Captain Synar is commendable, but there’s no need to pretend you’re here for me. You’re here for the good of the ship, and I can respect that. Come back and check on me whenever you like. I am hiding nothing. Monitor me all you wish. I promise it won’t change anything I plan to do.”

“Okay. What do you intend to do?” Gwen asked boldly, not really expecting an answer, and surprised when she got one.

“Seek my death by any means possible,” Ania stated. “That’s pretty cowardly,” Gwen replied, pacing closer to the door just in case the insult

didn’t go over well. Ania looked at the abrasive young female, saw the grudging respect in her expression, and

felt some true compassion coming off her. It had the effect of making her search hard for the right words to help Gwen Jet understand.

“Imagine that someone took away your rank on the ship and put you down in engineering repairing wires on circuit boards. How would you handle such a loss of your position?”

“I’d do anything it took to get my rank back,” Gwen answered, not needing to think about it. “Well, I lost eight Earth centuries worth of rank and I intend to do whatever it takes to gain it

back. You’ll just have to accept my word that being a demon host is much worse than a mere demotion.”

“No, I get that,” Gwen said, running an agitated hand through her short hair. “I just don’t get the whole part about wanting to die. Most people want to live so badly that they will do anything to stay alive. I’ve never met someone so determined to do the opposite.”

“Okay, here’s another analogy. Imagine someone took away all your memories of being a first mate on this ship,” Ania said, turning back to the comp unit, which had given her a notification that the search she’d started was almost complete. “Imagine you looked in the cleansing area mirror and saw a stranger’s face each day.”

“No, I can’t imagine it,” Gwen said sincerely. “But if that were the case, I’d like to think that I’d find a better solution than death.”

“Before I became an ambassador, I spent a whole century as a Pleiadian warrior, fighting and killing as I had been trained to do. The eight centuries I spent reforming myself were far harder work. I will not allow my body to used for destruction again.”

Resigned to getting no understanding from anyone, Ania knew her efforts to explain were just as wasted on the Commander as her anger was.

Gwen went to the door, reluctant to leave and yet desirous of escape now. Ania was not an easy person to be around. Synar’s personal interest in the cool, self-assured blonde was still a mystery to her. Somehow she had pictured Synar with a much more subservient type. Though Ania looked angelic by Earth standards, the Pleiadian female’s energy was powerful.

Gwen would bet a week’s worth of credits that it was the female, and not the demon, holding the leash on her physical form tonight.

“It’s difficult to imagine you as a warrior, but my father taught me to read energy. Yours is very strong. Is that the demon in you?”

Ania frowned. It occurred to her that she didn’t know. “I do not know how the demon affects me, but I assure you, I have a warrior’s spirit.”

Gwen stood by the door, idly wondering what Ania had been like in that first century of her life. While her imagination played its games, a great desire to find out the truth of the matter hit her. She couldn’t remember the last time she had felt so strongly compelled to pursue something she wanted to know.

No—that wasn’t true. The last time she was compelled was when she foolishly offered herself to Zade. That had been a stupid thing to do, but still very compelling. The Siren had sent her away flatly and with no explanation about what had been lacking in her offer. All that misery over his unexplained rejection, and yet everyone mocked her for shunning her intuition.

Gwen shook her head at the injustice, but found herself opening her mouth foolishly again. “In case you’re ever interested in getting back in touch with your warrior side, I work out

early in the officer’s training area. You’re welcome to join me if you need to burn off some of that mad stuff you’re feeling for Synar,” she offered, glad to see the older female fighting a smile.

Ania laughed, but not unkindly this time. The young female meant well and was charming in her efforts to befriend her. “Even without the demon, you are no match for me. The warrior has been sleeping for more than eight centuries, but today I felt her wake up. Your ego might not be able to handle being bested in combat by a female you consider your inferior.”

“When did I say you were inferior? Sure, I may have thought it a time or two. I can admit that. Your appearance reminds me of Earth women who use their bodies to advertise personal hygiene and fashion products. Sorry, but you just don’t look like a warrior at all.”

Ania was astounded to hear a short, hard laugh erupt from her throat. She hadn’t been insulted in centuries. The naïve woman based her assessments on appearances. How did she come to be a commander?

“Thank you, Gwen. I worked very hard to become what you see,” Ania said, smiling at Gwen’s shock. “Or didn’t you mean your statements as compliments?”

“Hell no,” Gwen said, grinning that Ania has used her name. “Come kick my ass tomorrow morning and prove your big talk about being a warrior.”

Still amused at the younger female begging for a fight she was destined to lose, Ania bowed her head in acknowledgement of the offer. Novices always thought a master was lying. In fact, her last insult about her fighting might even have come from Dorian’s tongue when she trained him. How ironic that Dorian was attracted this time to someone so like himself.

“Your offer is quite tempting, but not tomorrow,” Ania said. “I have some reading to do that will take me several days. I will look for you at the required evening meal. Your company will prevent the need to converse with Synar or Dorian until the worst of my anger has passed.”

“Want me to hook you up with a bonding partner to clear Synar’s memory from your brain? Chiang the Greggor is quite talented with his hands, though he says his tongue is magic. You’d probably like him, Ania. He speaks in poetic statements all the time, just like you,” Gwen teased.

Ania studied her. So curious that Dorian hadn’t made his move on this feisty female yet. If the Earthling would just use her intuition, she would easily see Dorian’s energy wrapping itself around her body like ethereal hygiene straps. It was obvious that the Siren was already starting to warn other males away from a female he considered his.

“Gwen—I will ask a favor, if I may. When Dorian comes to you, will you give him a message for me?”

Gwen considered it odd that Ania thought Zade would seek her out for something since he

never sought her out for anything. She nodded anyway, wanting to seem friendly. “Sure. If I see Zade, I’ll give him a message for you.”

“Tell Dorian I am glad he finally found a worthy mate.” Ania allowed herself another genuine smile over Gwen’s immediate frown at her words.

“Does your message mean you’re done being angry at Zade?” “No. Not the way you mean. My trust in Dorian is broken,” Ania explained. “But I would not

dishonor his life’s journey by using my anger to hurt him. The message is because Dorian is slow to act even when it is for his greater good. I thought the message might give him a nudge in the right direction.”

“So Zade’s getting married—I mean, mated?” Gwen corrected, the thought of him with another female bothering her way more than it should have.

Ania shrugged. It wasn’t her place to interfere in anyone’s destiny. “Dorian’s spirit has chosen. That doesn’t mean the female will accept him. Mating connections are complicated matters.”

Gwen laughed at Ania’s philosophical musings. “Zade’s been living like a monk since I’ve known him. I can’t imagine what kind of female would tempt him from his chastity. This I have to see.”

“Do you have a mirror in your quarters?” Ania demanded, laughing again at the puzzled look she received. “Open your eyes Gwen Jet. Dorian favors you.”

“Been there and tried that. He sent me away. Turns out I wasn’t Zade’s type.” Ania shook her head and sighed. It was amusing to imagine the shock ahead for Gwen, and

just because she couldn’t see herself as a potential mate for Dorian. The emotionally volatile Earth female would put the calm, spiritual Siren male through great torment before the two of them would reach some peaceful arrangement in their mating.

Just the thought of Dorian suffering over a strong-willed female capable of fighting the Siren’s call was almost enough to make Ania wish to remain corporeal.

“Why are you still laughing at me?” Gwen asked, frowning. “I want to know what amuses you so much.”

“Destiny amuses me,” Ania said, deciding she would say no more. “I will look for you tomorrow at the evening meal. Blessings to you, Gwen Jet.”

“I don’t normally do that formal stuff, but—blessings to you as well, Ania Looren,” Gwen said, relieved to be leaving.

As the door closed quietly behind her, Ania turned a still smiling face to the comp unit. The volatile Earthling female was quite different from Dorian’s other two females, who had lived only to serve his every need.

Not that Dorian had taken extreme advantage of his former mates, but neither of the others had made the elite Siren any less arrogant. Gwen’s energetic presence still lingered in her room. She had a feeling that Dorian was completely underestimating the will of the Earthling commander. Gwen Jet’s agreement would not be won easily.

Ania ordered up a list of her files. Her humor over Dorian’s future faded, returning once again to a deep concern over her own as she began to read the information on the screen.

Chapter 8

A full week passed in study with Ania spending most days in front of the room comp unit immersed in reading. Nothing she learned had changed her mind about having her remaining life tied to a demon’s. But through the studies, Ania did acquire some empathy for the entity she hosted. She had concluded that the demon Malachi was as much a slave to Synar’s family as Ania felt she was to Synar and him.

As a Pleiadian warrior she had fought and subdued demons, but realized now that she had not really understood them. Her knowledge at the time had come only from the stories and legends told to her by her commanders.

From her current research, she had learned that demons were pure energy, much like the highest form of the Creators of All. More, she had learned that a demon’s power was far greater than she had been told in her training. From the many accounts of demons and the devastation they caused, it seemed that even the least powerful one could kill an entire military force without help.

That was bad enough, but the rest of her knowledge saddened her. She had learned that most demons retained their corporeal sensibilities, which meant they were no less evil in energy form than they had been as physically incarnated beings. Ania could understand why the Creators of All had cursed them to spend the last few millennia as mist. Malachi and his original kind had been incapable of progressing past their selfishness and desire for control.

But where was the redemption process in their punishment? In her eight hundred years of studies, there always had been a path for each creature to cease

their evil and use their will for good. The redemption path for demons had eluded her all week. Though still a child, she had been alive during the conversion of the last of them. She just

hadn’t known what their conversions had meant any more than the other warriors who were training alongside her and learning to constrain them in their new forms. Demons could not be killed, but the Khalsa warriors had been trained to help their masters enforce the ancient contracts.

The demon Ania carried appeared to be one of the oldest, given the amount of time Malachi had passed through the hands of the family overseeing him. In corporeal form, the demon within her had been a powerful leader on his planet. When his original kind refused to turn from their constant warring, the Creators of All intervened to give them what they professed to want. Unfortunately for the demons, the unlimited power they had received had come with the price of an eternity without physical form.

In demon mist form, no matter what they did, acquired, or achieved, they never got to enjoy the fruits of it. No treasure to hoard. No touching their mates. There was no life outside a host where the best a demon could do was share the shadow of living. It had not taken long for each condemned spirit to become the willing slave of any person consenting to house them and share their corporeal experiences.

Many planets had myths about demons, stories Ania imagined were specific to the hosts and masters who inspired them. Not all demons could go into hosts and not all demons had masters. Some demons stayed in mist form, perceived only as evil influences floating in the ether. On Earth, hosting a demon within your body was called “being possessed,” a term that Ania thought most apt for her personal situation. She could readily see now why Gwen had mentioned it.

Linked demons—those with masters like the Synar family—had evolved from necessity.

Over time some hosts had proven too weak to fully control the darkness of the demon’s nature blending with their own. Hosts increasingly took on the power-mad urges of their demons. That was when the Creators of All made one other change to the demon’s punishing arrangement.

The most powerful—those like Malachi—were given a demon master, another controlling entity with a proven record of doing good. The demons were tied to their masters energetically, and by a sacred contract. She could not calculate it completely with the records she found. It seemed a few centuries before Ania had been born, Malachi had been contractually bound to the Synar family.

Bound demons were spiritually unable to refuse any request from their master other than those that would harm their host bodies or other members in the master’s family. The original demon masters were chosen carefully. They received years and years of training from spiritual guides who appeared to them individually.

Demons were then passed along through the families from the parent to the oldest child who was in training all their lives for the task. This had happened for many generations without incident in the Synar family, until Malachi was passed to Liam Synar.

“Malachi is a rather nice name for a demon,” Ania mused out loud, snorting when she saw the comp unit light up.

“Run secondary search on Malachi Demon?” “No,” Ania said, quickly touching the screen to close the history file she had been reading.

“I’ve read enough.” And she had. Her sympathy was already weakening her resolve to do what was best for

herself. It had begun the moment she had read that Liam Synar had not been trained to be a demon master.

Entering the interplanetary academy almost two centuries ago, Liam had trained to be a pilot. His elder brother Conor had trained to control the demon. It was all recorded in the ‘History of Malachi’, a registered document which was required by Peace Alliance laws to be kept updated. What wasn’t yet recorded though was how the untrained younger Synar male had ended up with the demon instead of his fully trained older brother.

The last entry in the file was made by Liam’s father the year before she and Liam met. He made no mention at all of Liam in his final entry, nor about aborting his plans for passing Malachi on to Conor. There was just a simple update about some fight, no mention of Jonas Tangier, and then the record was silent on the rest of what had passed.

Yet even understanding now why Liam Synar wasn’t a willing demon master didn’t explain how as a nine-hundred-year-old intuitive Ania had not seen the truth from the very beginning of her time with him. Had she been so enamored of the Norblade male that she simply had not seen who Liam really was? It was unlike her to be caught so unaware.

“How in Helios did you hide the demon’s energy from me, Liam?” Ania asked the question to the empty room, musing aloud as she had so often during the week about how it could have happened. Some part of her wanted to ask Liam to tell her his story, but she didn’t want to be distracted by having to figure out what was truth and what was illusion in his words.

No. She would not ask Liam. She wanted a more straight-forward version. Today—if her understanding was correct—she had finally learned how to get information

directly from the source. Ania looked around at her tiny room and sighed at how confining the space was to her senses.

“If Malachi comes when I call, will I be talking to the demon? Or talking to myself? Both will probably hasten the demise of the rest of my mind.”

Demon hosts were brought back from the edge of their own deaths, Ania had read. They were usually kept in a state of ignorance about the hosting situation. Though that didn’t seem fair to her, Ania could understand their logic about it. Hosts knew nothing other than that they were in some kind of normal service to the demon’s master. Much like a warrior serves in an army, the demon host was recruited and made to follow orders.

Her planet’s laws forbade such use of a corporeal body without the person’s permission. What person would ever give it willingly? No Pleiadian would. As a result, her kind rarely hosted demons. Ania learned that she was the only one registered in the last thousand years.

When she pulled the files from her inquiry, she had found that the commissioner had forced Synar to give his word to inform her. Pleiadians thought that when a body was near death, the entire spirit should be allowed to transform together. Lingering in illness or near-death was not seen as noble. Hastening death was considered wise in many circumstances, especially for a species who lived at least two thousand years. Pleiadians saw nothing to be gained by suffering the pain of old age for five hundred years or more.

After death, the physical body was always completely destroyed to ensure all links to the corporeal world were indeed broken. Yet her dead body still walked, even though it was an abomination to everyone, including her. The demon could not and would not let her die without Synar ordering it to do so.

But there had to be some exception. There always was. Since none of her research had been quoted as coming from a demon source, Ania concluded that only the entity under the contract would know such details. It was unfathomable to her that no one had interrogated a demon directly. Was her research all simple speculation?

One by one she adhered twenty silver magnetic mirrors to the metal locker by her desk and chair, smiling as she recalled the bursar’s stunned reaction when she asked for so many of them.

“This may be the craziest action you have ever taken in your entire long life,” Ania said, talking to herself.

Standing back once the last mirror was in place, she shook her head again. When voluntary death wasn’t an option because of a demon in your body, was there a limit on the other insane things you should try? She was already doing what she considered to be her last resort. Perhaps she would learn why no one sought them out.

“Let’s just hope this works,” Ania said to her reflection. She bent to the comp screen, read the recommendations again to be sure she had her intent

set correctly, and then faced her reflection with no small amount of dread. The face she saw was familiar to her, but all her instincts were telling her that the image was no longer right. She cleared her throat to make sure her voice was as strong as possible when she spoke.

“Malachi, Demon of Synar. I am your host. I command you to show yourself to me in the mirrors, but do no harm.”

The same blonde female with eyes like the sky stared back at Ania in disbelief and she wanted to laugh at her own reflection. Maybe her mind was already gone.

“Malachi. Demon of Synar. I COMMAND you to show yourself to me,” Ania stated much more firmly, eyes flashing in irritation.

She watched anger building in the female in the mirror. Then suddenly her image changed into a dark mist that reformed itself into the same male with dark hair and dark clothing that she had for a brief moment witnessed talking to Synar at her tribunal inquiry.

Ania lifted her chin and waited for his image to completely solidify. Then she watched in shock as the male in the mirror bowed his head respectfully to her as if they were normal

creatures meeting for the first time. When he lifted his face to hers again, to Ania’s utter shock he was smiling at her, or at least she assumed it was a smile.

“I have not been called by a host in over a millennium. After looking through all your memories, I thought eight hundred years of spiritual study would have totally precluded this outrageous act. It is not often that I am so completely surprised. It must be the courage of that sleeping warrior you warned the delectable Commander Jet about,” Malachi said.

“What is your name, demon?” Ania asked, having read that you needed the demon to willingly give his identity to you. His name was the seal on the sacred contract.

“My name is Malachi, the Demon of Synar, as you well know. And you are—Ania Looren,” Malachi said, striving to be as charming as possible.

“I wish to know how to break this link between us, Malachi. I wish my corporeal body to die. I command you to tell me how to do this.” She kept her voice as hard and uncompromising as possible.

The demon was silent for a few moments, and then Ania sensed his willingness to answer her. It was like she could read the nuances of his fathomless gaze even though he technically had no eyes.

“Very well, host. You can be killed accidentally, like in a natural disaster that I can’t get out of you fast enough to prevent. You could have yourself shot out of a shuttle tube into space. Pretty much any large catastrophe could destroy your body beyond my ability to repair it. It would be simpler, and much less messy, to talk Liam into putting me into someone else—preferably someone masculine,” Malachi replied, grinning at his last statement.

“Is there no other way than by accident?” Ania asked, hating the imploring tone of her voice. “Well, you know I can’t let you kill yourself. My cursed contract requires me to do what I

can to stop you, including complete reanimation. Even if I’m not a hundred percent successful at preserving sentience, we can go on forever with you in a coma, though that would be dreadfully boring for us both. Can we sit?”

Ania wrinkled her forehead and frowned. “It was just a simple request, host. Don’t you consider yourself to be some kind of high

intellect after all your studies? Never mind—I forgot who I was talking to for a moment. You studied spiritual matters.”

When she continued to look clueless, Malachi sighed. “Okay, let’s just go with this level of information maybe not being in what you read. The

rookie demon communication tool you’ve created is still a set of real mirrors. So when you sit—I can sit. We both have to do the same whole body action for it to work for me.”

Ania couldn’t say why she conceded so readily to the demon’s suggestion, but she simply sat down in her chair as she continued to look at him in wonder. Sitting, she could see only his shoulders and head, but it was still enough to determine that Malachi must have been a very handsome male in his time. “You look much more normal than I expected.”

“I save the scary stuff for fighting. Who wants to go around with pointed teeth and talons all the time? I was just as normal as any other terran being once. This is an approximation of that form. And why in the raging fires of Helios do we now use that awful Earth English and their names for everything? Wait—am I babbling? I am, aren’t I?”

To her utter surprise, Ania burst out laughing, then chided herself about laughing with him, or worse laughing at him. It was too bizarre to accept lightly.

Malachi arched his eyebrows and looked off, slightly offended. “My dear host, I hadn’t spoken to anyone in two years until Liam conjured me up at the inquiry. He said two sentences

and sent me away again. My social skills are rusty.” “It is not the state of your social skills that amuses me, but rather my own reaction to the

sight and sound of you. You are not at all what I anticipated, and yet you are what I have known inside myself. Why have you not absorbed my entire essence, demon? I read this was a possibility.”

“We probably want to save that big discussion for another time. Unless you want to command me to answer, in which case I will have to do so.”

“So what I read was correct? I can command you?” Malachi nodded. “Yes. You can try it now if you like.” “No,” Ania said, her tone firm. “I have no wish to be another master for you. I just want

some truthful information about our situation. You are as much a part of the greater plan of all as I am. I heard parts of what you and Liam discussed at the inquiry. I heard enough to know you don’t want me for a host.”

“Well, don’t sound so disappointed. It’s not like I got to choose and passed you over for a better female. There were at least twelve different male bodies left dying after the attack on you and Liam at your mating celebration.”

“I don’t remember what happened,” Ania said. “Of course not. Liam asked me to block you from knowing. Trust me, he could have chosen

any one of several fine young male bodies as a host. When I realized Jonas was no more, I immediately picked this one male who was at least three meters tall with broad shoulders, long hair, and with the kind of bonding equipment that I would have enjoyed helping him use,” Malachi said fiercely. “But no, Liam ordered me into his dying mate. It was a spontaneous act on his part, but makes perfect sense if you know him well. No trained demon master would have ever put me into an enlightened female. Talk about incompatibility.”

“Yes. I regret our union as much as you do, demon. It is why I sought this discussion.” But Ania found she was unable to be angry with anything Malachi said when she couldn’t

blame him for his attitude. “In our two years without Liam hovering over me, I had a lot of time to study you, Ania

Looren. For some reason I haven’t discovered yet, I actually felt sorry for both of us, instead of just myself. But don’t expect me to continue doing so. You are a master now that you have called me, and I am just the demon you control. What is your next wish, oh master?” Malachi demanded, baiting her to see what she would do.

Ania smiled, and she could tell it surprised him. “What now, host? My willingness to answer your questions amuses you as well? Are you

trying to purposely provoke me? I could torture your body to the point of death if I chose. It might hasten along your goal to shed me.”

“Indeed you could, but you would only be doing me a kindness to help kill me, demon. Don’t you know that’s what I’m thinking?” Ania asked, answering his question with a question of her own.

“No. Actually, I don’t know what you’re thinking, not when you have us untethered this way,” Malachi replied truthfully, trying not to consider how much power he was giving away to his host in revealing it. “I can catch up later by scanning your memories. There is nothing you can hide from me—except temporarily.”

Ania crossed her arms and watched as the demon crossed his. The edges of her mouth threatened to lift in a smile, but she held it back now that she knew the being inside her could be offended.

“Who would have thought demons could be so entertaining to verbally spar with? Are you familiar with the Earth stories about djinn granting wishes?”

Whatever reaction Ania had been expecting, it certainly hadn’t been full out laughter from him. She smiled as she waited for Malachi to recover from his mirth.

“A genie? You think of me as a genie in a bottle. How unique. I don’t think I’ve been that amused in four or five centuries.”

“Well I conjured you, and you said ‘what do you wish’, and I just thought. . .” Ania let the rest go unsaid, realizing she had drifted too far from her original intent in wanting to speak to him. She put a hand to her head as a wave of dizziness passed over her. “Why am I light-headed now?”

“You are not well, Ania Looren. Without me in residence, your body always returns to its near-death state. In order to communicate like this, I had to remove a large part of my energy from your body.”

“I see. How quickly would I die without you?” Malachi shrugged. “Honestly, I do not know. While in your body, I am lending you my life

essence, as Liam commanded. It doesn’t have to be this way, but almost no one accepts a demon’s full healing because of the price.”

“You can heal me? I read nothing about such healing. Explain this choice,” Ania demanded, feeling a thump of excitement in her chest.

“If you choose, I can permanently give you some of my life essence which could support you for the duration of your incarnation in your physical form. However, you would also take on some of my less pleasant characteristics in the process, which is why almost no one chooses to do it. You and I would be more alike than dual-births within the same family. I especially don’t see a female who has purposely kept herself as beautifully light as you are, being very happy about getting demon hair, dark skin, and glowing eyes when the rage is upon you. Also, the constant mental link with me might contribute to—well, let’s call it instability.” Malachi grinned at Ania’s look of surprise. “Most people just don’t want to be that much in touch with their dark sides.”

Ania laughed at Malachi’s last comment, but there was not much humor in her mirth. “I’m already mentally unstable enough to talk to a demon using a bunch of mirrors. And you already know there was a time when I was very much in touch with the darker side of my nature. Tell me, Malachi—once healed, would my body still fall into sleep when Synar calls you out?”

“No,” Malachi said carefully, starting to realize how seriously his current host was considering a permanent merger with him. “In fact, you would lessen Liam’s power over me because my first loyalty would shift to you. He could still command me to do things, but only if it did no harm to you. Unlike being in a warrior who served him, I could say no if I thought you were at risk.”

“Would you also have less power?” Ania asked. Malachi snorted at her lack of understanding. “Demon power is so infinite even I don’t know

how much I have. It is the greatest irony of my situation. I doubt I would miss what little I would give to you for your life. You are quite the considerate entity to even ask, Ania Looren. Maybe I should be more grateful that you ended up being my first female host.”

“In seeking my own freedom, I have no wish to enslave you further. But do not think me a fool. How do you benefit from our merger? I command you to be completely honest.”

Malachi smiled again. Without him controlling her thoughts as Liam directed, Ania Looren was far more interesting. It was a pleasant surprise.

“The truth is what you have read. I will share all your corporeal experiences. You will eat and drink, and I will feel satisfied. You will bond, and I will feel the pleasure. In male hosts the demon essence enhances their natural aggressive traits. Since you’re a Pleiadian female. . .” Malachi shrugged because the reference to her reserved nature would have been rude to state flatly. He didn’t want to risk offending her.

Ania hung her head because she knew what Malachi meant. Malachi would get next to nothing from her lukewarm bonding responses. “I think we have well established that I am not your first choice for a host. How long can we continue to co-exist as we are now?”

“Probably only a few more centuries at your advanced age,” Malachi teased, trying to improve her mood again, pleased and surprised by her irritated smirk. It had been a long time since he’d conversed so normally with a host, much less so personally with a female. It was an odd sensation to desire positive emotional reactions from Ania Looren, and yet he did.

“Can Liam actually keep me bound to my physical form that long?” She was unable to imagine her body hosting a demon for centuries. She hadn’t even wanted to host one for a day.

“Liam is probably trying to hang on to the illusion that he can go back in time and change what happened to you. If Conor had been your mate, he would have had no problems shucking the guilt of your death. He would have put me in a proper host and used me as he saw fit.”

“Conor Synar. Yes, that reminds me of my original reason for wanting to talk with you. Tell me the story of how Liam became your master. I read the recorded history, so I know Liam wasn’t trained.”

Though the demon seemed quite willing to converse with her, Ania reminded herself that Malachi was not prone to being benevolent without cause. Whatever he willingly shared, she suspected it served his own good.

“Liam is no slouch as a master, especially when his stubborn side takes control, but he wasn’t formally trained. Conor had more natural leadership ability and received the benefit of his father’s training. The brothers may look a lot alike, but inside they are two very different males. Their father, Bogdan Synar, was a great warrior. The planet of Norblade ebbs and flows with political intrigue. Powers rise. Powers fall. Bogdan and I worked well together. I was never bored.”

“What happened that Conor did not inherit you? I order you to tell me the truth of this as well.”

Malachi met and held her gaze. “If you insist, I will tell you, though Liam will not be pleased.”

“I do not seek Liam’s approval. Go on,” Ania ordered. “True evil is not ugly or even as dark as a demon. It hides in plain sight, serving itself.

Sometimes evil even looks just as handsome as Conor Synar. Liam’s older brother liked to physically torture the females he chose for bonding. Then when the torture got boring, he started killing them just to feed the natural darkness in himself.”

“If you think that information shocks me, it does not. I have tortured and killed as well, only it was to serve war and not my own darkness. The spirit of many creatures holds a capacity for the abuse of power.”

Malachi crossed his arms when she did, fighting not to roll his eyes at the regret in her voice. He had obviously left too much of her enlightened memories in place.

“I’ve seen what you did as a warrior. It wasn’t that bad. . .now where was I? Young Liam was away at academy when Conor’s true nature was revealed to Bogdan. He might never have gotten caught if a set of concerned parents hadn’t come looking for their daughter. They found

Conor in the act of hurting her. The girl lived and agreed to not shame the whole Synar family if Conor was punished. Bogdan agreed that his eldest would be exiled to a planet where the struggle to survive would keep Conor’s nature occupied in a healthier way for half a century. Then he would be put through social reconditioning, much like the tribunal wanted to do to you.”

“Is Conor still exiled?” Ania asked, ignoring the demon’s reference to her trial for crimes that were his fault. She didn’t want to engage in a debate sure to end their discussion badly.

“My energy connection to the Synar family was disrupted when Liam and Jonas left Norblade. I’m not sure of Conor’s fate at the moment. Judging from the attack on your family, I think he escaped from exile around the time of your unfortunate mating accident. While he was not present then, Conor’s energy was all over the group who did the attacking,” Malachi said. “Jonas was the prime target. It was an example of me not being fast enough to prevent my host’s death. All I could do was kill the entity that took his life. I took great pleasure in doing so.”

Again Ania ignored him, careful not to show fear or shock. “Where do you think Conor is now?”

“Out in space somewhere looking for Liam most likely.” Malachi looked at his host, amazed to be even mildly distressed by her concern. What was it

about the Pleiadian female that weakened him? He almost sighed when she did. “Or if he has figured it out, Conor could be looking for you now instead of Liam. Your planet

has declared you dead and listed you as my host. The jig is up, as Liam’s Earth vids would say. It was Jonas and Liam who were supposed to get killed when you were hurt. They got Jonas, but you stepped in front of Liam and saved his life. Ooops. . .forgot you didn’t know that. Liam will certainly be angry at me now.”

Ania rose from her seat without thinking. She had saved Liam’s life and not known it? Why had he not told her? She paced to the door, but kept in partial view of the mirrors, not knowing what would happen if she stepped completely out of sight.

“So that’s why Liam put you inside me? He did it because I saved him first.” She had no memory of almost dying, no memory of stepping in front of Liam, but she could

easily imagine doing so because she would do it again today. Did that mean she still cared for Liam? Ania didn’t like the answer that came to her, but it resonated as truth.

She turned to look at the male in the mirror. What else didn’t she know? “Don’t get choked up and weepy over it,” Malachi joked, laughing at Ania’s sentimentality

over what was still a very selfish act for Liam. “Come back and sit down. You’re making me tired, Ania Looren.”

Ania came back and sat when she realized Malachi had been pacing just because she was. “This is all very illuminating. I am tired of secrets.”

“Yes—I am too. However, being older than even you are, I have learned in the last millennium to stop fighting my destiny. For example, I was initially unhappy with our arrangement, but being in you probably saved me from a life that would have caused the Creators of All to seek the end of both me and Conor Synar. I would have had fun torturing and killing for the most part. It is a rush like no other. But creating chaos can get just as old as everything else. Conor’s nature is much like mine before I became demon mist.”

“Were you as cruel to your victims?” Ania asked. Malachi shook his head at her request for a truth he knew Ania did not really want to hear.

Her displeasure was obvious in her frown. “I was cruel to some because power and control is useless unless there are weaker beings to

exercise it on,” he admitted. “Mostly I killed them quickly. I was an impatient sort.”

Ania tried not to be shocked by how blasé the demon was about killing. Had she been any better about it? “If you and I make a more permanent arrangement, would that stop Conor from being able to get hold of you and use your power?”

“No. But Conor would never have all of me for as long as you existed, and you would always have my first loyalty. Of course, until a few days ago, Conor didn’t really know where I was and would have been shocked at where Liam put me. Now he’s probably just angry about what I did to the killers he sent. Assassins can be very expensive. I know because I used to hire them.”

Ania remained quiet, thinking about all Malachi had told her. She was still upset, but at least she now knew Liam had reasons for his actions. Plus she admired him for trying to keep his brother Conor from gaining control of Malachi.

“If we were merged, what would happen if I died?” “What I gave you will return to me, and all of my energy would go into a new host to start

the process over. Why?” Malachi asked, not able to discern the thinking behind the question. Ania would be dead in that instance. She would never know what happened to him—or Liam.

“And if there were no master to command you anymore?” she prompted. Malachi shook his head. “Impossible circumstance that will never occur. For a demon of my

kind, there will always be a master. It would either be the host or someone of Liam’s intent. I’m sure the Creators would love to surprise me.”

“I find it hard to imagine how your ownership could pass from creature to creature. And it seems unfair that you will never be redeemed,” Ania said, speaking her thoughts freely at last. “My evil deeds were as bad as yours, but I walk free. Have you served all your masters in the name of doing good?”

“My record of confirmed kills is larger than any planet’s record that Liam has visited. To the best of my knowledge, no linked demon has ever been freed from the eternal contract. We serve our masters, but we do so by killing. Why are you asking all these questions about what happens to me?”

“It is just the way I learn. I’m trying to understand all the options before I exercise one,” Ania said quietly, bowing her head to shield her confusion from his gaze. “Tell me, Malachi. How badly would you hate to be linked to me for my lifetime?”

“Didn’t you read the very definition of a demon? I am evil and must be controlled. I do not hate. I am hated.”

Malachi recited what she had read with a husky laugh, puzzled when Ania just looked more concerned. He had never understood females and living inside one for almost two years still hadn’t helped. Ania Looren was an especially strange one.

“Look, don’t waste any of your precious emotions on feeling compassion for me. So what if we spend a few centuries together while living out your boring Pleiadian life? I’ve had worse hosts. Besides, I’ve quite enjoyed our conversation today. We can keep doing this mirror trick as far as I’m concerned. It beats not talking to anyone at all.”

“On that point we are in full agreement. You have drawn back the veil at last,” Ania said softly. “I would like to think about what you have told me and talk to you again tomorrow.”

Malachi shrugged. “You don’t need my permission, Ania Looren. I’m just the demon. Call me out and I will come.”

“You are a sentient being and I will respect you as one. Thank you for answering my questions, Malachi,” Ania said formally, bowing her head until her chin touched her chest. “You may take leave of me whenever it suits you.”

Instead of bowing to her in return, she watched Malachi look upward while shaking his head,

the mist blurring with his movements. It was the last thing Ania saw him do. Then she was suddenly staring at her own cool, but shocked reflection again.

Chapter 9

Gwen walked across the mat, reaching a hand down to her opponent who was wiping a trickle of blood off his lip.

“Shades of Kellnor, Gwen. You caught me off-guard as usual. And I swear you’re getting faster all the time.”

“Maybe you’re just getting old, Jurek,” Gwen teased, tugging to pull her former academy trainer to his feet. “I know Norblades live hundreds of years. Are you out of shape or something?”

Gwen barely dodged the swipe of Jurek’s fighting stick aimed accurately at her ass. She had talked Synar into bringing her old trainer onboard a year ago. Jurek said he was tired of being planet bound and wanted adventure. She had laughed at him then, but was often glad since to have someone around that knew at least a little about her. She had never been close to her biological family, but it wasn’t great living among total strangers all the time either. She liked having Jurek around.

“If all my academy students had been as vicious as you, I would never have gotten bored,” Jurek said on a laugh. “And four centuries is not all that old, even for a Norblade. There are entities on this ship a lot older than me.”

Gwen laughed at Jurek’s protesting, then swung into a fighting stance to round on the female who had come in unnoticed. She hadn’t felt Ania come up behind them. It wasn’t often she got caught off-guard.

“Well I don’t think four centuries is all that old either,” Ania said calmly, walking across the mat. She bowed her head to Jurek, and then to Gwen. “Four centuries is very youthful compared to my nine, and I don’t feel old at all.”

Jurek looked at the beautiful female and smiled. This was the new crew member everyone was talking about, the one rumored to have been Captain Synar’s mate. Stepping forward, he picked up her right hand and bowed low over it, touching his forehead to her knuckles in respect. He felt power inside the female rushing around, waiting restlessly to be used, but straightened without commenting on it. Searching her sky blue gaze, he saw only deep serenity.

Figuring they didn’t know each other yet, Gwen turned to address her old friend first. “Jurek, this is Ania Looren, Synar’s—”

“—newest crew member,” Ania answered firmly, interrupting Gwen’s introduction. “Captain Synar has asked me to consider staying onboard as the Liberator’s Peace Keeper.”

Jurek let go of her hand and bowed his head. “Welcome then, Peace Keeper Looren. It is my honor to greet you. Did you come to seek warrior training this morning?”

Ania smiled at the offer. “Thank you, but no. I was trained as a Khalsa warrior, and such training stays with you forever. I have spent the last eight centuries training rigorously for peace instead. I confess I have not fought in ages, Jurek.”

Jurek smiled and bowed at her words, not questioning her statements, even though he could not really imagine the female in front of him ever being as fierce as the Khalsa warriors were typically held to be.

Gwen laughed hard, bringing their joint attention to her. “Khalsa warrior?” she exclaimed, not caring that her tone revealed her total disbelief. “You

said you had training, but that’s a pretty big brag for a female who looks like you. How about you show me what you’ve got?”

Jurek put a hand on Gwen’s arm, but his face was turned to Ania. “Gwen means no genuine disrespect. It is her Earthling side. Commander Jet struggles to control her tongue.”

“Don’t apologize for me, old man,” Gwen jokingly protested as she brushed off Jurek’s touch. “If I can put you on the mat and bloody your mouth, I’d probably send Ania to medical.”

Ania studied Gwen, not missing her laughing eyes and smiling mouth. Somewhere in the middle of a mostly sleepless night, she had begun to believe there really might be a higher purpose for what was left of her life. This morning she had come looking for the aggressive female, hoping that time in Gwen’s company would help distract her until she could decide how she felt about what she’d learned from Malachi.

Instead, Gwen was trying to establish power over her, a habit she had noticed Commander Jet had with pretty much all crew members. It was the same rookie leadership inclination in every unenlightened being Ania had ever met, but Earthlings were especially bad about it. What Dorian found appealing about Gwen eluded her. She’d take a stoic Norblade over someone who wanted to fight every blessed day.

“Come on,” Gwen encouraged. “It will be over when one of us falls to the mat. I promise not to hurt you too much.”

Ania snorted. The cramp in her stomach came as no surprise to her and this time she knew what it was about. All her warrior memories rose up fast and complete within her mind. She knew it meant Malachi was pushing her to agree to Gwen’s challenge. But the demon had not been able to undo all the many centuries of work Ania had done to set the warrior part of her aside.

Her higher nature argued against fighting the unsuspecting Earthling and won. “As much as it might temporarily amuse your trainer to see you defeated, fighting you would not be fair. I mean no insult Gwen, but I must refuse your request.”

Gwen laughed hard and shook her head, not surprised Ania backed off. “If you actually have the potential to defeat me—which I seriously doubt—I would never allow it to happen. No insult to you Ania, but frankly, I’d put your way-too-serene-ass on Jurek’s mat within the first two minutes.”

Ania watched Jurek cover his mouth to hide both his amusement and his dismay at his pupil’s insulting words. How challenging a student Gwen must have been for the Norblade trainer. The young female was full of arrogance and over-confidence.

Ania studied Gwen’s body, smiling at her standing there all loose limbed in her unconcerned stance. Was part of her higher purpose to teach Commander Gwen Jet some humility? Ania smiled, enjoying the thought.

Maybe fighting the overly-aggressive warrior would help her decide whether she could learn to live like that again. If she chose to align herself with the demon, Ania imagined there would be no choice but to conquer her inner warrior a second time in her life.

“Very well,” she conceded at last, bowing her head to Gwen. “This must be a life lesson for you to learn, Commander. I need a moment to prepare. It’s been centuries since I fought anyone.”

Ania walked to the edge of the mat, closed her eyes, and placed her hands palm-to-palm in front of her chest. She had no problem ignoring Gwen’s rolling laughter, but almost laughed herself when Jurek smacked Gwen hard on the arm.

“Be respectful. As a Khalsa warrior, Ania Looren outranks you,” he said firmly. “Not in this century she doesn’t. Not on this ship either,” Gwen said confidently, walking to

stand across from Ania. “And you mean if she’s Khalsa, Jurek. Nothing has convinced me of it

yet.” Gwen didn’t doubt Ania had some warrior training. Most females on planets other than Earth

did. But like many stories in the universe, she was sure the legends of the Khalsa warriors were more myth than reality. It wasn’t like Ania was the first person she had ever met claiming to be one, nor was Ania the first braggart Gwen had had to put down on a mat either.

All fighting techniques had their strengths and weaknesses. Gwen judged that she was at least six inches taller and weighed a fourth more than the smaller female in front of her, who looked more like she was praying than preparing to fight.

The sight of a modestly built blonde standing serenely with palms touching made Gwen roll her eyes. She looked away to make sure neither Ania nor Jurek caught her doing so again, because she couldn’t stop herself. She had to remember not to hurt Ania. If she did, even accidentally, Synar would have her doing galley duty for who knew how long.

Using all her patience, Gwen waited until Ania raised her head and dropped her hands to her sides. She watched with a smile as Ania took several steps forward across the soft mat. The Pleiadian had no idea about the solid thumping Gwen planned to deliver. There wouldn’t be a perfect hair left in place when she got done.

“Jurek, may I borrow your defense staff?” She caught it easily as it came flying through the air to her. “I am ready now, Commander. You may attack me at your convenience.”

Gwen laughed and charged her. She felt a light touch on her arm, then found herself skidding to a stop. She was a bit surprised to be looking back at Ania who was still standing serenely in the same spot on the mat.

“What the Helios just happened?” Gwen demanded. “My staff was not needed. I used your own force to deflect your intent,” Ania explained

softly. “You may try again when you are ready.” It was the snooty tone as much as anything that sent Gwen charging back toward Ania,

intending to put the smart-ass mouth on the mat along with her pretty blonde ass. Three seconds after that thought, Gwen was airborne and on her back staring up into sky blue eyes. Too late, she noticed the glint of determination in them.

“The fiercer you become, the more it works against you,” Ania said instructionally, reaching down a hand. “No need to concede this quickly. I wish to continue if you do.”

Panting, Gwen let herself be pulled to her feet. Ania wasn’t even breathing hard. “Are you using the demon as a power source?” she demanded.

Ania felt Malachi rage within her and laughed at being caught between an aggressive female warrior and a more aggressive demon. “No. I do not need the demon to fight you. I have not even used all my Khalsa skills. Your attacks are too rudimentary to test them fully.”

A picture of her using demon power appeared in her head and Ania’s whole body shook apprehensively in response.

“What?” Gwen demanded. “I received your answer in a vision. I am not using his power unless my eyes are glowing red.

It is probably best in those circumstances to just stay away until the demon rage passes.” Gwen thought of Synar’s instructions the day they rescued her and shrugged. She was not

going to fear what she didn’t understand. “If you’re not using the demon, then how the Helios did someone like you put someone like me on the mat so easily?”

Ania motioned her forward. “Let me show you. Take your favorite fighting stance. Now push through it slowly, but attack.”

While Gwen was doing so, Ania placed her fingertips under Gwen’s hands, let the power of

her stance flow into them, then twisted gently. Down Gwen went again. Ania bent over her to peer into Gwen’s shocked face.

“Whatever you bring to me, I simply give back to you. The harder you fight, the harder you will lose. I spent fifty of your Earth years learning to do this. It is extremely hard to master but never fails. Do you concede defeat yet, Commander?”

“No,” Gwen said bitterly, struggling up by herself this time. “What if there were multiple attackers? What if you were hurt? What if you lost your cool while you were fighting? No one stays as calm as you do all the time.”

“It is very Earthling of you to doubt even when you have been bested several times. Very well, Commander. This time you can strike me. I will allow you one blow for demonstration purposes.”

Gwen shook her head, pacing back and forth while she debated. She could not strike the smaller female with no provocation. Could she?

“The demon will not attack you for striking me. I sense he is enjoying our fight too much. Just do it. You’re the one always bragging about how tough you are.”

Gwen reacted then, rounding with a kick that had Ania’s head snapping back. It was a move that had toppled a great many seasoned male warriors. To Gwen’s shock, the small, fragile looking female did not fall with the blow.

Instead, Ania’s head came forward, blonde hair messed up, but still falling like silk around her shoulders. The Pleiadian female was so eerily beautiful that it made Gwen want to laugh again. Her admiration was followed by the largest flash of intuition Gwen had ever felt, but she didn’t act on it fast enough to save herself. She watched Ania’s tongue flick out to lick the blood from her lip.

“Consider that my gift to you, Commander. That’s all I ever allowed an opponent to harm me.”

Ania ran toward Gwen, charging her and using her fingertips to spin and flip Gwen yet again. This time when Gwen realized she was down, she found herself pinned to the mat with three of Ania’s fingers on her chest. Ania spoke a single word that vibrated in the air as she pulled her fingers away.

Gwen struggled against the invisible bands holding her in place, shocked when she couldn’t get up. “What did you do to me? I can’t move.”

Ania straightened and walked calmly around the struggling Gwen, enjoying the sight of her helpless on the mat. It brought no huge pleasure to defeat the hot-headed warrior, but it was extremely satisfying to see such enormous shock in her questioning gaze. Did the foolish young female seriously never consider that she would one day come across a foe she could not defeat?

Ania sighed at the sheer arrogance of such a thought. She supposed there had been some number of years when she had thought the same. Perhaps it even helped when you were that young to think yourself so invincible. Gwen had been lucky never to have encountered a foe like her in a real fight.

“Seriously Ania, how are you doing this?” “You are held in place by the force of your own power,” Ania explained reluctantly, not sure

yet that she wanted Gwen to know. “Cease struggling and in time you will be able to stand. It requires letting go of all your aggression. Although in your case, from the short time I have known you, that could take all day.”

“If that’s your idea of a joke at my expense, I guess you earned it. I’m sorry I underestimated you based on your appearance. I don’t think I’ve ever misjudged an opponent as much as I have

you.” Ania stooped near Gwen and laughed. Humility had softened Gwen’s tone, but not defeated

her true nature. There was apology, but also continued resistance. She found that very appealing in the younger female’s character.

“Reluctant apology accepted, Commander.” Speaking a word into the air, Ania unbound the power holding Gwen in place.

“What the hell are you?” Gwen rolled to her side and pushed to a sitting position, looking defiantly at Ania.

“She is Khalsa,” Jurek said respectfully, walking over and reaching down to pull his brash pupil to her feet. He took back the fighting stick Ania held out to him with a wary smile. “Remember this lesson, Gwen. Consider yourself lucky that Peace Keeper Looren was taught how not to harm her opponents.”

Gwen rubbed her butt. She had landed hard both times. “If that beating wasn’t meant to hurt, I can’t imagine what kind of harm she can do when she gets serious. But that’s okay. I don’t really need to know.”

Ania smiled at the compliment, and it soothed her. Gwen’s graceful acceptance of her defeat and the life lesson accompanying it made her feel sympathetic enough to offer a little more advice. “If you think what I just did was impressive, never challenge Dorian to a fight.”

“Zade?” Gwen asked, the question a tiny squeak of genuine disbelief. “I’ve been fighting alongside him for two years. He’s good, but not that good. He’s not like you.”

“No, he’s not like me. He is worse. Dorian has taken vows to not harm more than is avoidable. I’ve not met his equal. It is a blessing to all creatures that Dorian Zade is devoted to peace.”

Gwen shook her head. “Okay. Don’t challenge Zade to a personal fight—got it. If you’re going to keep destroying all my illusions today, I’m going to need food to handle it. Come eat with me.”

Ania nodded and bowed her head. “It would please me to do so.” “You want to join us, Jurek?” Gwen asked, swinging her gaze to the male at her side who

shook his head. “I had my morning meal earlier. Thank you for inquiring.” Jurek smiled at the two females walking off together. Good, he thought. Gwen could

certainly use some female mentoring. Two years of calm on the Liberator and now all Helios was breaking loose. Even the less intuitive crew members could feel it coming. He could only assume Gwen had blocked it, or she’d have been pacing in concern like everyone else seemed to be doing.

As the females collected their shoes, Jurek turned his attention to the male who had stood transfixed at the door for the duration of the fight. He watched him glance at the females talking, and then silently walk away.

There had been no mistaking the surprise on Captain Synar’s face though, especially when Ania Looren had bound Gwen to the mat with a single word. Jurek imagined his captain was now wondering how his famous Norblade intuition had failed to recognize that a centuries-old mythical warrior had joined his crew.

Chapter 10

An insistent and loud knocking on his door roused Dorian from his meditation. Fortunately, he’d been on his way back to consciousness anyway. He blinked several times, pulled himself to stand, and walked drowsily to the door. When he opened it, Synar charged by him uninvited. Dorian glared at the rudeness and shook his head.

“Why didn’t you tell me Ania was a Khalsa warrior?” Synar demanded. “Because she is not one, Liam. She left that profession by willful choice. Why did you not

ask her about her past when you first met her?” Dorian asked in return. “Surely your intuition, if not your intimacy, informed you of the ancient power she carries within her.”

“She was an ambassador—a Pleiadian healer.” Synar turned his back to Dorian and closed his eyes in frustration. “I knew only that something in her pulled at me. That’s why I mated her. I did not know what it was. You could have warned me, Dorian.”

Dorian shrugged and firmed his mouth into a tight line of resistance. “It was not my responsibility to tell either of you about the other. You did not mate the warrior, Liam. You mated an enlightened female who spent eight centuries cultivating peace in her spirit. I did not tell Ania that you were a demon master. If you want to tally my errors, I wronged her more.”

“Don’t make light of this. I put a demon into a creature who can kill by speaking words into the air, and now I find out she is Khalsa as well. I thought her power was merely Pleiadian spiritual training. You never corrected me,” Synar said harshly. “Why did you not stop me from saving her?”

“Stop you? You put the demon in Ania before I had any say in the matter. Nothing could have stopped you when you realized your mate had taken a laser weapon hit to save your life,” Dorian answered stiffly, walking to his bed and dropping his robe, smiling when Liam turned away from his nudity. “She was my spiritual teacher for more than a century. I wanted Ania to live as much as you did, just for different reasons.”

“Did you not hear what I just said? Ania pinned Gwen to the mat with a couple of fingers and a single uttered word.”

“So? Demons always go into warriors.” Dorian forced himself to respond reasonably, resigned that his peace today had ended. He stepped into uniform pants and pulled a tunic shirt over his head.

“Don’t be emotionally naïve, Liam. That’s not why you are angry. You’re wondering why the Khalsa warrior in Ania never wanted you back, even though you desired her fiercely. You and I both know you were never sincerely attracted to the spiritual version of her.”

Synar was irritated that Dorian couldn’t just once let him vent on what he considered the problem. No, Dorian had to always throw the hardest truth in his face and follow it with a verbal smack. Was the Siren truly his friend? “You knew that was because Ania merely tolerated our bonding. I had hopes of changing that response over time.”

“Ania cared for you enough to break her vows of chastity, yet you did not honor her for that sacrifice, which was much braver than anything she ever did as a Khalsa,” Dorian said with deep conviction. “While I was truly surprised she conceded to an official mating, I took Ania’s agreement to mean she loved you. I took your desire for her to mean that you at least knew her spirit, even if you did not love her for who she was. Your intuition typically exceeds that of most other Norblades. How was I to know you were simply refusing to see?”

“Love is a Earthling word, Dorian. It hardly covers my connection to Ania,” Synar said.

“Yes, love is a Earthling word, but one that sounds exactly right to all ears but yours, Liam. If you would have faced Ania with the truth right after it all happened, you might have created the relationship you initially sought. Now too much time has passed, and Ania faces another destiny. It is one you will never share completely, though you will never escape it either.”

“Stop talking in riddles. If you see what’s coming, tell me so I don’t make another mistake,” Synar demanded.

Dorian stopped dressing to look at Synar. “Fine. If you wish to know, I will tell you. The female you mated is soon to be no more. Nothing you do can prevent that from happening. I suggest you say your goodbyes to the Ania you think you know. She has found her escape from your control and plans to follow it through.”

“Tell me what Ania plans. I command you to do so.” With panic sickening him, Synar’s thoughts were torturous. Ania could not die. Too much

was unsettled. Dorian has to be mistaken. “No. I am not mistaken,” Dorian said firmly, bending to secure his boots. “And I did not

intrude to read you. Your thoughts are screaming at me. Even someone like Gwen could hear them.”

“Please, Dorian. I don’t care what you do to me, just tell me what Ania plans to do.” “No. Not this time.” Dorian glared at one of the few males his Siren nature had ever allowed

him to genuinely care for. He had no plans to let Liam coerce him again. “I sided with you against Ania two years ago, and that has not accomplished anything good, Liam. Now I honor her right to make decisions about her future. She may be a slave body to your demon at the moment, but that was never meant to be her destiny. Her spirit is too large to be constrained in such a manner.”

“I cannot read her anymore, Dorian. But no matter what she denies, I swear by the Creators that Ania Looren is still my mate. I need to know what she plans.”

Dorian walked to stand over Synar. He looked down into his face, steeling himself not to give in to his compassion for his friend.

“You need to release your illusions. Ania is not your mate—not truly. But it was not the separation documents she filed that changed that status. Ania Looren ceased to be yours in any real sense the day you chose to not return for her.”

“You know I left to keep my brother from knowing Malachi was in her,” Synar said fiercely. “Why are we discussing this? You agreed to help me. You know why I didn’t return.”

“Do I? Do you? You could have taken her with us. We could have protected her. Stop lying to yourself, Liam. You left Ania because you were avoiding the very demon you intentionally put in her,” Dorian replied. “This isn’t even about her. You are still refusing your legacy and it is has cost you a great price.”

“Do not mock my concern for her,” Synar yelled. “Then be her mate as you profess to be,” Dorian yelled back. “But you will have to confront

the demon and deal with him as well. Both are now part of who Ania has become. She and the demon are aligned.”

Synar paced to the door and back, head down as he fought his rising anxiety. “How am I to know what is only Ania? I still want her, but I want Malachi out of her.”

“You remind me of a male who has put his offspring into a female and doesn’t want to claim it’s his.” Dorian felt his mouth curl with the words. He was disgusted by his own analogy because it was so close to the truth in Synar’s case.

“Who are you to judge how I conduct myself? I’m not the only one not claiming what’s

mine.” Synar shot back the insult, but flinched when Dorian’s gaze darkened with pain. He hadn’t meant to hurt him, but had lacked any other way to get his friend to see his point.

“Indeed. My cowardice has been as bad as yours, but I’m about to rectify that mistake too. You might have to find a new first mate.”

“Or I might have to find a new spiritual counselor. Maybe even a new friend,” Synar said, threatening an action he would never in reality take. Someone of Dorian Zade’s caliber would be welcome on any ship’s crew. The Siren male only travelled with him out of friendship, but even that seemed at risk now.

“Dorian—look, I didn’t come here to fight. I came here for help. Why are you pushing me to act before I know what is right to do?”

Dorian took a deep breath, hoping to calm his anger before he spoke. “Any alternative is preferable to what it has been like to do nothing for two years. Do what is right, Liam.”

“Do you think any of this is a simple for me?” Synar demanded. “No, I do not think it is simple. But you suffer from doing nothing at all. Ania’s spirit longs

to take back control of her life. All the demons in existence could not keep her from what she intends, nor would they want to. Why are you? Tell her how you feel.”

At Synar’s head shake, Dorian gestured widely with his arms. “Reluctance to face your personal truths rules you too often. We are done with this

discussion, Liam. I will advise you no more until you act correctly towards Ania Looren.” Dorian watched Liam spin away, and his door slammed shortly after. Heaving a sigh, he looked down at his fully dressed body and wondered where in Helios he

intended to go. He wasn’t reporting for duty for another four hours. He would still be happily nude if it weren’t for his fight with Synar.

Why couldn’t Liam just honor the female he mated and share his feelings with her? All this strife over mating was exactly what he had worked so hard to avoid. Females were as much trouble as they were a source of pleasure.

But Synar was right about one thing. He had avoided his own destiny far too long. It was time to take a first step toward straightening his own path.

He walked to the com port on his wall and touched the screen. “How may I assist you, Lieutenant Zade?” “Report present location of Commander Jet.” “Commander Gwen Jet is in the dining hall.” Sighing with resignation, he removed his hand and walked determinedly to the door.

Chapter 11

Sleep wouldn’t come to Ania no matter what she did. She hadn’t been able to bring herself to call out Malachi again while she was still processing what he’d already told her. Even without memories of her near-death, it was not difficult to imagine a shocked Liam catching her dying body in his arms.

What would she have done if their situations were reversed? Seeking her death had seemed the only answer several days ago, but now Ania wasn’t so sure

anymore. If she sought her death, then what good would be served? Hers? Would Malachi be better off in a person who might not have her value for all life? What if Dorian was right? What if there really was some higher reason she still lived? Did she have the right to decline her responsibility to the demon? Wouldn’t that make her as

bad as Liam? Sleep was obviously not coming while all the questions swirled inside her. Since meditation

was still not possible, Ania dressed in loose clothing and made her way to the training room. Maybe if she spent some time exercising, her physical body at least would find some peace.

Late as it was, Ania hadn’t expected to run into anyone or to have to share the room with another sleepless spirit. Yet the light was on when she got there. She hesitated for a bit, but decided to see who it was. Perhaps the person was close to finishing. Maybe she’d take a walk while she waited. Anything was better than going back to her tiny room to stare at the walls.

Pushing open the door, Ania first saw only the sweat glistening along the muscles of his broad shoulders and arms. His back facing the door, Synar was hooked to the weight machine, arms straining with the effort to lift all the weight he had chosen. The room normally smelled of straining muscles, but the familiar scent of this specific body had Ania crossing the room to him. It had been a long time since she’d been comforted by a male scent that once wrapped around her as securely as a cover.

“I couldn’t sleep. What’s your reason for being here so late?” she asked, forcing him to acknowledge her presence.

“You know I’m not a morning person when it comes to physical activity,” Synar said, never breaking his count as he pulled the heavy weights along their path. “I come here when I know everyone else is asleep. Second shift crew is on duty. It’s the perfect time to be alone.”

“Do you wish me to leave then?” Ania asked. “You already know the answer to that, and I’m not just talking about the training room,”

Synar said, his voice straining with the effort of what he was doing as much as what he was saying.

Ania ignored his inference. “I didn’t come to debate my existence. I came to find some physical peace in my body so I can sleep. Do you care if I use the mat?”

Synar pulled the weights a couple more times before he answered. “If I won’t distract you, go ahead.”

“Distractions never bother me. Even if they did, I would consider it good practice to ignore you. We’re going to be doing that a lot until I am gone.”

Synar snorted, then dropped the weights to meet Ania’s gaze directly. “I’m starting to think you did a good job ignoring me even when we were together. Why did you never tell me you were a warrior?”

“You never even let me tell you how old I was, much less talk about my past. Instead you

convinced me nothing I did before we met mattered. Did you speak an untruth?” “No. I didn’t ask personal questions because I always knew how old you were. If you were

Norblade, you’d probably still be older because I like seasoned females. I never had a problem with your age, or knowing you could be the last female in my life. I accepted long before we mated that you’d probably outlive me.”

“A long life is not something a Pleiadian chooses or declines. We believe a long life span is a gift of the Creators,” Ania said. “How did you find out about my age?”

“I’m the captain of a Peace Alliance rescue ship. I looked up your records when you came onboard the first time. Your official file only mentioned that you’d had the standard defense training. It for sure never mentioned you were Khalsa, which most think are as mythical as demon masters. Why was that information missing from your history?”

“I asked to have my warrior record stricken from my biography so that it would never be weighed against my work for peace. I worked very hard in those first two centuries of spiritual training to put all memories of the Khalsa away. I was trying to hide it, but I would have told you if you had asked more questions about my life.”

“How would I know to ask? I just happened to be passing the training room when you were fighting with Gwen. Being a Khalsa warrior seems like a pretty important thing not to tell a mate,” Synar said, turning away to switch his weights to the other arm.

“Is it as important as you putting your family’s hereditary demon in me two years ago and saying nothing about it?”

Ania glared at his back Synar stopped pulling on the weights to answer. “Yes. I have truly learned not telling you

about Malachi was a bad decision. Since I can’t change the past, all I can do is worry about us all living with the consequences of my mistakes.”

“Are you worried about my angry reaction to walking around knowing I’m hosting Malachi? Or just worried now that you put a demon into a Khalsa warrior?”

“Both are equally bad,” Synar admitted, pulling the weights again to keep from reaching out to her. “Demons are always put into warriors, but never into someone like you by a simple mistake of not knowing. I never meant to put a demon into an advanced warrior.”

“I see. You’re blaming me for your decision. So you would have let my body die if you had known I was Khalsa?” Ania crossed her arms to hold in the hurt.

“I don’t know what I would have done. You stepped between me and my certain death. For two years I wondered why, and now I know. You did what any warrior would have done,” Synar said.

“Though I have few memories of that day, I don’t think your recall is clear either.” Ania ran a hand through her hair. Why had she engaged him in this discussion? He refused to

honor her thoughts on the matter. Synar pulled the weights so hard, they clanged against the machine and gave him a warning

light. “It wasn’t just me you saved though, Ania. You’ve probably saved countless lives because you kept my brother Conor from gaining control of Malachi. The demon would have sought him out if I had died. I would thank you for that, but I’m still too full of shock that I mated someone very different than I thought I was mating.”

“Well I could say that as well, Liam. Norblade fidelity is legendary, and yet I married the only disloyal Norblade that ever walked. You did not honor me with the truth.”

The weights hit harder, and their clanging echoed in the room. The machine issued warning after warning to Synar, who resumed his workout as calmly as he could with an infuriating

female torturing him with angry words. “I have never been disloyal. I made a decision that might not have been the best one, but it

seemed to be the only reasonable one at the time. I appreciate your sacrifice for whatever reason you saved me. I understand it was what any warrior would have done.”

Ania looked at the male whose arms were once her haven. If he held her now, they would feel like a trap. He did not know her. “I was no longer Khalsa when we mated. I was exactly the female you met. I was what I had made of myself, someone living a life devoted to peace.”

“You know it doesn’t work like that, Ania. Once a person is a warrior, they are always a warrior. Why are you trying to deny this?” Synar demanded.

“You were always skeptical of a person’s ability to control their life. Do you even believe in change? One would think you were a fatalist, Liam Synar.”

“Not a fatalist, just a realist. It does not bother me to know you are a warrior. It bothers me to know you never intended to tell me. I saw only the version of you that you let me see. It changes how I view putting Malachi in you. It changes how I see your actions in saving me. It changes a lot and might have made taking you with me seem like a good idea two years ago if I had but known,” Synar said fiercely, hearing his voice grow louder and more angry with every statement.

“So that’s what this is,” Ania declared, understanding at last. “You feel guilty for making the wrong decision. But instead of just admitting you made an error, you would rather shift the blame for your mistake to me. Face it, Synar—you wouldn’t have believed it back then even if I had shared that I was Khalsa. You don’t even want to believe it now. You never accepted anything I ever said to you.”

She glared at her former mate. His jaw was clenched. His mouth was tight. Resistance was in every tiny nuance of his body. His mind was not able to accept the truth of how much he had meant to her—still meant to her, though Ania was working hard to set her caring aside.

How could any female continue to care for a male so determined to excuse himself from all his wrong actions? It hurt to think Synar actually believed the Khalsa in her had caused her to save him. Was he really so blind?

“I realize that I am not the most passionate female to ever exist, and never have I forgotten you found me lacking when I shared your bed,” Ania said as stoically as she could, even though the truth of it hurt.

“I never said that,” Synar denied. “No you didn’t, but I’m an intuitive. Do not attempt to deceive me now.” She stared at the

wall for a moment, then looked at him hard. “Stop creating false reasons to assuage your guilty conscience. I gave up eight hundred years of vows to let you into my body and my life. Think about the significance of that the next time you start asking yourself questions about our mating day.”

“You know I honor all the sacrifices you have made for me, whatever your reasons,” Synar said roughly, meaning it more sincerely than Ania was capable of believing in her agitated state.

“Honor them? You don’t even understand them, Liam. Agreeing to be your mate for life was a much bigger sacrifice for me than any single instance of my death would ever have been. I was going to share centuries of my existence at your side instead of pursuing what I wanted. Why was I willing to change all I was for you? I’ll tell you why—because I thought you were my destiny.”

“I am your destiny,” Synar said fiercely, hope lighting all kinds of fires inside him. “And you are mine.”

“Not if you think it was the Khalsa in me that stepped in front of you. I never used my

training for that level of goodness, which is why I left it. Your resistance to the truth disgusts me. We are done with this conversation.”

Ania made herself walk away from him before she gave in to her sudden urge to whisper words into the air to render Synar unable to continue pulling on his weights. His continued refusal to own his mistakes made her very angry. She didn’t like being angry. Anger was a state of being that she didn’t visit often because she didn’t handle it well. There was a time when creatures around her got hurt or died when she got this upset.

Synar let the weights hit too hard again, and again the machine issued the standard warning. Anger rolled off him as well, but Ania ignored it because she had her own mood to worry about.

“Walking away doesn’t mean this conversation is over. You and Dorian both have a tendency to want to utter the last word in every debate,” Synar said.

“Probably because we both get tired of explaining everything to unenlightened children who should be confined to their own planets until they mature enough to be among the rest of us,” Ania said. Then she walked away.

She grabbed the first wooden defense staff from the rack and marched to the center of the mat. She liked the feel of wood in her hands. It was one resource from Earth that she enjoyed very much.

Gwen had shown her a training exercise she did using a fighting stick. Ania copied it now, needing the physical release of following the staff’s arc as it sliced through the air. She moved through stance after stance, focusing on her body, intent on forgetting the male now watching her.

Well, let him watch, she decided. It changed nothing. Synar’s unrepentant attitude was making her even more determined to liberate herself from his control.

She moved through the exercises, repeating the motions as she remembered them, improvising the ones she had forgotten. So what if her gaze drifted occasionally to the male who studied her discreetly? It was always wise to keep an eye on even the friendliest of enemies.

Synar watched Ania move through Gwen’s warm-up exercises with the grace of a Zorgonian dancer. Each movement Ania made was smoother than the last, and Synar could tell she was making progress at removing him from her range of awareness.

He could also feel Ania building walls around her thoughts to shut him out of reading her. It was more than he could stand.

He let go of the weights with one last massive yank and drop. His muscles were protesting, but no louder than the rest of him.

Watching her now, his body clamored to go to her. Demon or not, he still wanted Ania Looren with the same raging need he had felt the first time. And now he wanted her even more desperately after all the time they’d been apart. Shades of Kellnor, why couldn’t he have realized this was going to happen two years ago?

Ania stopped when she felt Synar’s thoughts. “You didn’t figure it out two years ago because you only allowed yourself to think of one option, which was staying away. You accuse me of hiding truths, but you lied about coming back for me. That’s why I filed the mating dissolution form. I no longer wished to be at the mercy of your indecisive mind that changes like the shifting winds of Terlon.”

Synar went to the wall rack, picked out a defense staff matching hers, and walked to the mat. “Fine. You think you know my intentions and true feelings. Make me leave you alone.”

“I am Khalsa. It is easily done.” Ania sliced the air around her, following the staff with a sweeping glare.

“I disagree. Eventually, I will figure out how to appease you, Ania. Maybe I do deserve some of your wrath, but I won’t fall at your feet as quickly as Gwen. If you defeat me fairly, I’ll heed your demands. If I win, you must agree to forgive me.”

“You can’t defeat me, Synar. Have you ever won a fight with Dorian?” “Dorian isn’t here. And he isn’t you,” Synar said sharply, smiling at Ania’s confidence. He

was now getting excited at the prospect of getting his hands on her. “Dorian says I’m getting closer to defeating him. He says I’m faster than I used to be. After centuries of not fighting, you’re way out of practice. I figure that gives me a fair chance.”

Ania snorted. “How can you talk about being fair? You tricked me into your bed the first time with promises of affection and declarations of need that would have wooed any female. I still don’t know why I agreed.”

Synar’s answer was to smile wickedly at her confession. Her body shivered in response. A frisson of awareness zipped along her nerve endings, and what followed was so unfamiliar she almost didn’t recognize how aroused she suddenly was. The feeling was so disconcerting that it felt like illness to her.

“I remember our first bonding time like it happened only moments ago. I was just as desperate for you then as I am right now,” Synar said quietly, never taking his eyes from her.

Her life force pushed and pressed against every cell until Ania spun her defense staff to create a wider distance between them. Seeing him retreat was a reminder to her body not to betray her to this male. It was also a reminder to Synar that she wasn’t receptive to his words, no matter what she was feeling.

“Speak with Dorian. He can help you get some physical relief,” Ania instructed, lifting her chin.

“So can you,” Synar said, smiling again because he could see she was distressed. Beyond that though was more. And he wanted to know what it was.

Ania narrowed her eyes at Synar’s smile. Were there any sacred contract rules about punishing a male for lacking faith in his relationship to you? If she tried to kill Synar, Malachi would stop her. He had said as much. But maybe the demon would let her beat Synar up a little. The thought of making him suffer as she had for two years was far more appealing than it should have been.

“Okay, Synar. Let’s fight. In the interest of being fair to someone as young and unskilled as you are, I will even grant you one concession.”

“I accept. My concession is that you are to defeat me with only your own agility and strength, not with Pleiadian words of power, or using the demon,” Synar declared, grinning at his cleverness. What could she do now? “No pinning me to the mat like you did Gwen.”

“Agreed,” Ania replied. She was uncaring of what he asked of her. Her blood was starting to hum and her mind was seeking revenge. If there was any chance to wipe the condescension from Liam’s smile, she was taking it. “I will even allow you one physical strike if you want. It is what I allowed Gwen.”

Synar laughed and shook his head at her over-confidence. “I could never purposely strike you, nor allow you to strike me—on or off this mat. How

about you allow me one kiss instead? I know that would be as heinous and insulting to you as any blow. I haven’t held a female in a long time, and I want you more than I realized I would after two years. My body recognizes you Ania. It already prepares.”

“When you left me, Synar, you gave up your bonding rights. That means you are never touching me intimately again. I decline.” Ania calmly tossed the staff from hand to hand, as she

glared at him. “You are welcome to try to force me, but I wouldn’t recommend it, Liam. You owe me enough apologies already.”

Her accusation lit up every cell within him. He had assumed she had read him enough to know his regret. He never expected Ania would need the words.

“A hundred apologies will never undo my errors, so why waste the breath. I never wanted to leave you, but once I was gone, I was afraid to return as well. Do you really think my indecision was a greater wrong than forcing the Demon of Synar to save your life?” Synar asked.

“You abandoned me and broke your word, only returning under duress, not by choice. Maybe you should try feeling some genuine remorse for what you did. Or shall we just get to the part of this fight where I make you sorry you challenged me?”

Ania surprised him with a sweep of her staff, and Synar barely managed to block it. Swinging out her staff in the other direction, she used it to trip him until he fell solidly on the mat.

Not trusting his reflexes, Ania kept her distance as she paced around him. But she didn’t try to stop him when he climbed to his feet. “I thought you said you were getting faster. Dorian must be getting lax in his old age.” She walked a short distance away waiting as Synar got up. She made herself not attack. It would have been too easy to really hurt him. It shocked her to realize how much she wanted him to feel pain.

Synar looked at Ania and took his stance again. His body was already struggling with the first wave of his arousal. He was going to send it into her when he got his hands on her again. And the female he had mated was damn well going to give her pleasure back to him. Malachi be damned now. They could all be damned for all he cared. She was obviously the better fighter, but he was determined to win.

His worries about Malachi faded as he circled around her and drew in the scent of her excitement once more. Whether it was for him or their fight, Synar didn’t care. Bonding with Ania again was quickly becoming his primary goal. If he found out later the demon was using him and Ania for his own sick purposes, he’d make sure Malachi suffered. Right now, he didn’t care if the whole crew showed up so long as he got to touch her.

Many things had become clearer since he had watched her fight Gwen. One of the biggest was that he had always sensed something fierce inside Ania fighting for freedom. Synar understood now that he had instinctively mated her to have the right to become the one who helped release it. He planned to spend the rest of his days enjoying his warrior mate, as soon as she forgave him.

“You have no idea how much I want to kiss you.” Her staff cut the air close to his body and he danced away from it. Synar laughed that Ania

could look so fierce when she was mad. Excitement danced along arms that ached to hold her. Dorian was right. He had truly made a mistake leaving her alone for so long. But all he could do was offer Ania a future where he tried to do better. The symbol of his commitment was merely waiting for their embrace.

Ania glared at him continuously as they circled each other. Surprising him with its intensity, Synar suddenly saw hurt as well as anger in her gaze. Only desperation made him able to ignore her pain. Maybe he didn’t deserve a second chance, but he didn’t intend to watch his mate give herself to another male, not even Malachi.

She could file mating dissolution paperwork with every planet in the Alliance and it wouldn’t change how he felt. Ania was his female, his mate. She belonged to him.

“What is your hesitation, Ania? Are you afraid to attack me?” Synar demanded, tired of

watching her circle. “I was not the one who started this fight,” Ania said. “Your anger is so great, I can practically touch it. Attack me and release it, Ania.” “No. Attacking you would be a waste of energy. I do not waste energy. Who in the Helios do

you think trained Dorian to fight?” Ania demanded. “You weren’t even born when I trained him. I doubt your parents even were.”

“Are we back to the age difference again?” Synar sighed in frustration, his breathing ragged with caged emotion that threatened to break free to get to her. “I want you in my arms again, in my bed again. I want another chance with you. I’m sorry I left you alone. Give me a task of repentance. Anything. Name the cost and I will pay it. Let us cease this punishment of each other.”

“Task of repentance? Do you think your abandonment of me was just part of a simple argument among normal mates? Well, it wasn’t a simple argument and you are no longer my mate, Liam Syn—.”

Her words were cut off when Synar charged her, lifting her physically off the mat. Their staffs both went flying outside the mat boundaries, the wooden sounds of them hitting the floor echoing in the room.

Ania struggled as Synar’s arms held hers, pinning them to her sides, his embrace as unbreakable as he could possibly make it. She could have broken free with words of power, but the desperation she felt in him weakened her resolve. Ania saw his intention to get physical with her in his gaze, but when she braced herself for his intimate attack, his eyes gentled.

“Ania—I never want you to fear me. I don’t want to trick you into anything this time either. I just want the right to touch you again.”

He felt all her emotions rippling through him unchecked. Her resistance to him had been expected, but her fear of him cut like a knife. He couldn’t force her to accept his vibrations, couldn’t conquer the warrior in her after all. Too late he realized that he could only woo the female and hope she eventually opened her spirit to him again.

Leaning his forehead against Ania’s, Synar whispered the only words he had left. “I beg you to forgive me for the pain I have caused you. There can be no one else. There is

only you. Please give me another chance.” Synar’s arms loosened as he let Ania slide to the mat, his body shaking against hers in bliss

… holding her in his arms again … feeling her physically and emotionally. But he needed something to stop the madness of his desire, something to make up for the

lonely time without her. So even though Synar knew full well that Ania didn’t like kissing, his mouth desperately sought hers, becoming feverish and untamed as his tongue conquered hers. He felt her quiver in his arms, her whole body a vibration.

Raging fires of Helios, he’d missed her. And he didn’t remember Ania ever trembling with need in his arms before. It had always been his need that drove them.

“I’m sorry for kissing you but I needed the contact, the intimacy. Do what you will to me, but first—.” The words faded away as he was kissing her again with more raw desire than the first time.

Needing her closer, he lifted Ania high against the front of his body until her legs had no choice but to wrap around his hips. Her resistance to doing so bothered the mated male in him, but Synar couldn’t seem to hold back his actions to give her more time.

“You are the only female I want to share my vibrations with in this life or any other. Nothing has changed that for me, Ania. Nothing ever will change that. Please believe that I have never

spoken a more profound truth.” Synar felt her groan echo inside him as her arms tightened around him as last. He felt her

hands exploring his shoulders with a relief so painful that he weaved, trying to keep them upright.

When his mouth closed over hers again, the vibration of his devotion to her went out of him, not just through their mouths, but through every place they touched. Synar weaved again as Ania drew in a ragged breath and shattered in his arms, returning the vibration of her pleasure to him until he felt drunk.

Falling to his knees with her still wrapped around him, Synar was a truly penitent male at last. He saw himself for the fool he had been.

He had saved her to be with her. He had saved her because he cared for her. He had saved her to share this with her And then he saw that Ania had saved him for the same reason. The truth was in the tightness

of her arms around him even when her spirit resisted their bond. “I can still feel your anger, and I understand it. What must I do to redeem myself to you?” he

asked. Ashamed and shocked at her reaction which had held nothing back, Ania pushed against

Synar’s shoulders until he allowed her to slip from his arms. She staggered as she sought to make her weakened legs hold her up without his support.

“Come with me to my room, Ania. Let’s put the past behind us. I will do anything you ask to make it work this time.”

“What happens when another test comes along, Liam? Malachi is still in me. You’ll remember that tomorrow when your mind clears of bonding lust. Will you still want me then?”

Synar looked at her, unable to promise, but willing to risk finding out. “What about what we just shared? Did it not prove anything?”

“I lived eight hundred years without sharing myself with a male,” Ania said. “I followed those kinds of instincts only once in my life, and look what happened. The male I bonded with abandoned me when I needed him most. I almost died of loneliness when you left. I never want to endure that again.”

Synar climbed to his feet, resigned that little true progress had been made by their fight. “Do you have so little faith in me? No—don’t bother answering. I can feel your disbelief. Did what we just shared really mean so little to you?”

“No—I actually enjoyed our connection for once. I’m even thinking I should be able to sleep now. I thank you for that,” Ania said numbly, walking to retrieve their staffs. “If I ever have the need for physical relief again, I’ll keep your offer in mind. Perhaps having a bonding partner is a better idea than I thought.”

Ania tossed his staff to him, reluctantly admiring the way Synar caught it while still holding her gaze.

“You can treat this event as casually as you want, but no amount of ignoring it will make you less my mate. We are destined for each other. You said so yourself and you were right,” he said.

“Stop pressing me for what I can’t give you,” Ania ordered, walking past Synar to return her staff to the wall. “Other females can provide you with physical release as well. The only real use I am to you is as a host body to your demon. For whatever reason he has left my mind intact, I am convinced it was not to concede my free will to someone who despises us both.”

“The Demon of Synar cannot have you. Malachi’s presence won’t keep me from you again,

Ania. I’ve learned that lesson as well.” “You’re two years too late,” Ania said, not bothering to shield her disappointment. “This is not over, Ania. I will win you back,” Synar called out, the words bouncing off her as

she retreated. “Everything changes,” he heard her say, but had no choice but to accept it as a profound

truth.

* * *

Synar stood where Ania had left him and closed his eyes. Focusing his thoughts, he sent them down the halls of the ship as she made her way back to her quarters.

Malachi—take care of her, he ordered. What do you think I’ve been doing these last couple of years? And it was not just because you

ordered it. When are you going to care about doing the right things as much as your mate does, Liam? It’s quite admirable if you are a creature who seeks the good of all. I don’t, but she’s quite determined. You at least picked a worthy female for me, Malachi sent.

I did not pick her for you. She carries you out of necessity, not choice. Respect me or not demon, you will always do as I ask where your host is concerned, Synar replied, his mind in turmoil over the demon’s stinging words.

What was he missing? What could Ania need from him that he wouldn’t give her? Nothing, Synar decided. Nothing except her death.

Ania Looren is my mate. She may not accept it yet, but I command you to do so, Synar sent. His intentions were as uncompromising as his spoken declarations to Ania.

I had just about given up hope that you’d ever fully appreciate what an interesting female you chose, Malachi sent.

Just attend to Ania’s needs and don’t concern yourself about me. I tried not to fight her, but she insisted. I don’t want Ania suffering for what we did tonight, Synar sent, his anger finally reduced to concern.

Are you referring to the fight or to the bonding attempt afterward? I tried to tell you before that I was forbidden to interfere in a host’s intimacy choices. You really need to learn to listen more, Malachi sent.

If Ania’s life were not at risk, I would put you in the amulet for the rest of my existence, Synar sent, hating that Malachi even knew what he and Ania had done.

There’s no need to get mad at me for offering you information. I am the Demon of Synar. You know I will honor my sacred contract to you and your family. And I swear by the Creators, you can trust me to care for your mate, Malachi declared.

If you truly do that, then you will have at last earned my gratitude, Synar returned. When Malachi’s energy no longer reached out to him, Synar walked to the wall and hung up

his staff. Looking longingly at the mat once more, he turned out the lights and headed to his bed alone.

At least tonight he had the memory of Ania shattering in bliss to keep him company. He couldn’t remember his formerly cool mate ever reacting so strongly to his bonding vibrations before.

If that’s what came with waking up the warrior, then he was glad Malachi was forcing Ania’s Khalsa memories back on her. He had felt honest desire from Ania and now wondered how much more was waiting. Maybe Ania’s mating heat had been sleeping along with the warrior. If so, Synar looked forward to waking it completely.

The single vibration they had shared tonight had just been a small reminder of what once had

been a sacred promise between them. One day soon his mate was going to be back in his arms and his bed where she belonged.

# # #

NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR: If you enjoyed this ebook, please consider leaving a positive review or rating on the site where you purchased it. Reader reviews help my books continue to be valued by distributors/resellers and help new readers make decisions about reading them.

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~ Donna McDonald

Want more? Read an excerpt from The Demon Master’s Wife, Book 2 of the Forced To Serve Series at www.donnamcdonaldauthor.com.