Laois Offaly Tatler Issue 11 Nov 2010

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Issue No. 11 Fri. 26th November, 2010 Tel: 0504-51945 email: [email protected] [email protected]: www.offalytatler.ie www.laoistatler.ie

Distributed Free throughout Laois & Offaly Every 2 Weeks

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A man and his wife were lying in bedthe other night when he noticed shehad bought a new book entitled,"What 20 Million Women Want."He grabbed the book out of her handsand started thumbing through the pag-es.His wife was a little annoyed. "Hey,what do you think you're doing?"He calmly replied, "I just wanted tosee if they spelled my name right."

John and Jake went into a cafe thatlooked as though it had seen betterdays. As they slid in to a booth, Johnwiped some crumbs from the seat.Then he took a napkin and wipedsome mustard from the table. Thewaitress, in a dirty uniform, came overand asked if they wanted some menus."No thanks," said John, "I'll just havea cup of black coffee.""I'll have black coffee, too," Jake said."And please make sure the cup isclean."

The waitress shot him a nasty look.She turned and marched off in to thekitchen. Two minutes later, she wasback."Two cups of black coffee," she an-nounced. "Which one of you wantedthe clean cup?"

After examining a woman the doctortook the husband aside, and said, "Idon't like the looks of your wife atall.""Me neither doc," said the husband,"but she's a great cook and really goodwith the kids.

He said: "What have you been doingwith all the grocery money I gaveyou?"She said: "Turn sideways and look inthe mirror."

An English professor wrote the words,"Woman without her man is nothing"on the blackboard and directed hisstudents to punctuate it correctly.The men wrote: "Woman, without herman, is nothing."The women wrote: "Woman: Withouther, man is nothing."

This redhead, brunette, and blondewere talking about space travel. Theystarted talking about which planetthey'd go to if they could travel inspace.The redhead said,"I'd go to Mars, be-cause it is red, like my hair."Then the brunette, not to be outdone,said,"Well I'd go to Saturn, becauseit's got all those groovy rings."Finally, the blonde spoke up. Shesaid,"I'd go to the Sun."The redhead and the brunette laughed.The redhead said,"Number one, thesun is not a planet." "And numbertwo," the brunette finished,"you'dburn up."The blonde said,"Well duh! I'd go atnight!!!"

Judge: Is there any reason you couldnot serve as a juror in this case?Juror: I don't want to be away frommy job that long.Judge: Can't they do without you atwork?Juror: Yes, but I don't want them toknow it.

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Rules for Feeding Birds1. Feed regularly: don’t put out lotsof feeders and then forget to refillthem. Birds can become dependanton a food source during harshweather.2. Only use fresh peanuts and seed.Do not feed mouldy, wrinkled orwizened peanuts or seed.3. Ensure fresh water is alwaysavailable for drinking and bathing.An upturned dustbin lid with a stonein it is often all that is required. Besure to remove the ice in cold weath-er so that birds can drink.4. Birds often feed on the groundbelow a feeder. Make sure that thereis no shrubbery nearby that couldconceal a cat, and try to keep allfeeders at least 5-6 feet above theground.

5. Remember to wash all feeders andto change the water in the bird bathon a regular basis.

Can I feed all year round?Winter is not the only time we canhelp birds by feeding them - feedingbetween the months of April andOctober can also be helpful, as thereis a great demand on natural resourc-es due to the increase in hungrymouths to feed. Only put out peanutsin a fine mesh container so that par-ent birds cannot take large piecesthat might cause young chicks tochoke, and avoid fats completely.Safe foods to use at this time of yearinclude sunflower seeds, pinheadoatmeal, sultanas, raisins, currantsand mealworms.

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On the first day of school, the teach-er said, "If anyone has to go to thebathroom, hold up two fingers." Alittle voice from the back of theroom asked, "How will that help?"---A three-year old went with his dadto see a litter of kittens. On returninghome, he breathlessly informed hismother there were two boy kittensand two girl kittens. "how did youknow?" his mother asked. "Daddypicked them up and looked under-neath," he replied. "I think it's print-ed on the bottom.---

A father was helping one of his littletwins say his evening prayers. "Blessus to be good so we can return untoThee." "Bless us to be good so wecan turn on the TV."---Another three-year old put his shoeson by himself. His mother noticedthe left was on the right foot. Shesaid, "Son, your shoes are on thewrong feet." He looked up at herwith a raised brow and said, "Don'tkid me, Mom. I KNOW they're myfeet."

Kids Being Kids

With all the dire warnings of a repeatof last year's hard winter, it is time tomake sure that all the pipes and cyl-inders in the house are insulated toprevent winter damage again thisyear and to make your home aswarm as toast.

1. Make sure that your hot water cyl-inder is insulated. Don’t be misleadinto thinking that insulating the cyl-inder prevents the source of heat inthe hotpress. A lagged cylinder willstill provide ample heat in an en-closed space. Insulating the cylinderis an economically sound idea.

2. Hot and cold water pipes shouldbe lagged to avoid freezing andbursting, especially those in the atticand those running along outsidewalls in unheated rooms. Otherpipes to be considered are thosecoming into the house from thepump or going to the pump from thewell. The easiest form of lagging areflexible foam tubes.

3. Radiators can be insulated to makethe heat reflect back into the roominstead of the heat being lost throughthe walls. rolls of heat-reflectingaluminium foil that cut easily withscissors are sold with self-adhesivepads. alternatively, cut pieces ofcardboard and glue tin foil onto it.Place it behind the radiator with thereflective side facing the room. Af-ter a year the foil will turn black andneed to be replaced. The specialheat-reflecting foil does not turnblack.

4. The cold water cistern should alsobe insulated. This can be done withwith either a fibre blanket or piecesof polystyrene which can be cut tosize and held in place with woodenskewers. Make sure there is a lid onthe cistern to keep out insects anddirt and also to improve insulation.A lid can be made from chipboardcut slightly large than the top of thecistern and with a piece of polysty-rene glued to the bottom. The poly-styrene should be cut to the exactsize of the inside rim of the cistern.

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· Don’t go shopping when youare hungry - you’ll buy more than youneed!

· If you are shopping for theweek try and plan your meals ahead.

· Check your fridge, freezer andcupboards before you go shopping andplan meals around what you find.

· Then make a shopping list...andtry to stick to it!

· Beware of special deals - theseare great for toilet rolls and shampoobut bad for fruit, veg and salads(anything that is best eaten fresh).These are the things we buy becauseof a "good deal" but often do not geteaten.

· Try and buy loose fruit and veg- you get what you need and can cutdown on packaging waste in your binas well.

· Check use-by dates to avoidbuying food that might get thrown outif not eaten immediately.

· Poke around at the back ofshelves - you’ll often find ‘use-bydates’ that are further away.

· Shop for what you actually eat,not for what you want/wish you wouldeat (e.g. "I am going to be reallyhealthy this week and eat lots of yo-gurts!") and then not eat them!

· If it’s an option for you, tryshopping online for the basics - youget what you want and save money bynot being tempted to buy more on vis-ual impulse.

The Environmental Protection Agency(EPA) today (Tuesday 23rd Novem-ber 2010) launched the STOP FoodWaste Movement leveraging supportfrom 3 of the country’s top chefs,Rachel Allen, Kevin Thornton andDonal Skehan. The three well-knownchefs took time out to get behind themovement and encourage others to doso to, as they demonstrated how toprepare reduced waste meals whilstproviding tips on how to shop for andprepare food in the most cost effectiveand sustainable way possible.

To coincide with the launch the EPAalso announced the results of a nation-al research survey of 1100 people con-ducted by STOP Food Waste, aprogramme developed by the Environ-mental Protection Agency (EPA). Thesurvey found that 51% of Irish peoplethrow away food regularly. In fact,30% of the food we buy ends up in thebin, costing up to €1,000 per house-hold per year in food waste. TheSTOP Food Waste programme isfunded under the EPA National WastePrevention Programme (NWPP)where waste prevention is the pre-ferred waste management option inIreland.

StopFoodWaste.ieTop Shopping Tips!

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- Rents rose by almost half a percentage pointduring the third quarter of 2010, according to thelatest report published by the property website,Daft.ie. The average rent nationwide now standsat €840. With rents also rising in the first quarterof the year, it means that rents in October werejust 2% lower than a year previously and 27%below the peak.

The stabilisation in rents is being driven by urbanareas, which have, in some places like SouthCounty Dublin, increased in each of the last threequarters. In Dublin city centre and the North cityarea, rents rose 0.9% between July and October.Rents in Cork rose by 0.4% while rents in Gal-way rose 3.2% in the same period, reflecting sea-sonal demand. In Limerick and Waterford, therewas an increase of close to 1%. Outside the maincities, however, rents typically fell by 0.7%, acontinuation of ongoing falls in rents outside cit-ies during 2010.

Ronan Lyons, Economist at Daft.ie, said:"Indications that rents are levelling off reflects abetter balance between supply on the market anddemand. The total number of properties sitting onthe rental market around the country is downmore than a quarter from a year ago. Indeed, inthe cities, the fall is closer to a half. While someparts of the country still look over-stocked, whatis sitting on the Dublin market largely matchesthe number of properties traded in a given month,a sign that the market is currently in balance."

Commenting on the report, Professor John FitzGerald of the ESRI highlighted the importance ofrecovery in the rental sector for the wider econo-my. "The first sign that the wider economy is be-ginning to turn will be a move towards rising

rents. As of today, it is clear that rents have stabi-lised," Fitz Gerald said.

Laois Offaly & West LeinsterIn the West Leinster counties of Laois, West-meath, Offaly and Longford, rents were stablebetween June and September, rising 0.1% com-pared to a fall of 1.3% in the second three monthsof the year. The average rent in Offaly in the thirdquarter of 2010 was €610, a fall of €205 from thepeak in 2007.

Average rents in the cities, Q3 2010    * Dublin: €1079, up 0.3% on Q2 2010    * Cork: €836, up 0.4% on Q2 2010    * Galway: €834, up 3.2% on Q2 2010    * Limerick: €703, up 0.8% on Q2 2010    * Waterford: €663, up 1.1% on Q2 2010

Other findings* Rent-a-room income in Dublin is generally 5%below what it was a year ago. A double-room inthe city centre now typically costs €515 a month.* August marked the seasonal peak of activity,with almost 16,000 properties coming off themarket, compared to 12,500 in October.* The most expensive two-bedroom rents are tobe found in Dublin 2 and Dublin 4, where theyaverage €1,250 a month. In a number of post-codes, two-bedroom rents average less than €900a month.

The full report is available fromwww.daft.ie/report and includes a commentaryby Professor John Fitz Gerald of the ESRI, aswell as an analysis of affordability and statisticson residential yields around the country.

Rents rise in third quarter of 2010

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AGMKillavilla GAA Club AGM is on Friday 3rd De-cember at 8.30pm in Killavilla Community Centre.Nominations for election to the Executive Com-mittee and motions for consideration at the AGMmust be returned to the Club Secretary EoinMeagher before Friday 26th November. All arewelcome to the meeting and especially new mem-bers.

SympathyKillavilla GAA Club would like to offer our sym-pathy to the Maloney Family Ballyduff, on thedeath of Josephine Larkin nee Maloney.

Best of LuckBest of luck to Drumcullen Hurling Club in theLeinster Junior Final next Sunday.

Killavilla GAA Club

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MeetingA Brosna Gaels meeting for all mem-bers of the committee and all involvedwith Brosna Gaels will take place onSunday 6th December at 6pm in Bally-cumber GAA meeting rooms.

Junior BThe Junior B presentation night willtake place on Saturday 19th February2011.Brosna Gaels Table Quiz

We are having a series of table quizes inDecember, starting with a quiz onThursday 2nd December in Ennis Pub,Ballycumber at 10pm. On Thursday 9thDecember we will be in Flynn's Pub,Grogan and in Gavin's on December16th.

Firewood AuctionBrosna Gaels will hold a firewood auc-tion in the new year. We are currentlyasking landowners or anyone with ac-cess to firewood to donate same to Bro-sna Gaels. We will also removedangerous trees if required. Please con-tact Liam on 086 2604770

Brosna Gaels HurlingVisit www.offalytatler.ie

www.laoistatler.ie

LOTTOThe numbers drawn in last Monday[15th November] night’s Lotto were 1013 14 21. There was no Jackpot Winnerand No Match 3 Winners. Next weeksJackpot is €4,200 AND Match 3 PrizeFund is €400 with the draw taking placein Doyle’s, Killeigh on Monday 29thNovember.

CLUB AGMThe Annual General Meeting of RaheenGAA Club will take place on Friday

week 03rd December at 8pm SHARP inthe Clubhouse, Geashill. ALL Players,Members & Officials are asked to at-tend.

SYMPATHYRaheen GAA would like to extenddeepest sympathy to the family of thelate Shane Gavin, Walsh Island follow-ing their tragic bereavement last week.RIP

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Club PROsAdd us to your mailing list!

Promote Your Activities Events, Fundraising etc.Throughout Co. Offaly and Laois

Free of Charge!Send Your Club Notes & Photos to [email protected]

Or [email protected]

We will also put on our Website www.offalytatler.ie& www.laoistatler.ie

Clara GAA Notes By Mike Mullen, Clara GAA PRO.

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Weekly Club Lotto

Weekly Lotto 20-Nov-10. There wasone winner of the weekly club Lottojackpot. The winning numbers were6-10-16-26. The jackpot winner wasMorgan Redmond. There were fourmatch three winners and they wereLorraine McCormack, May Kirby,Aisling Stones and Val Smullen.Next weeks lotto takes place inDoc’s and the Jackpot is €2000.Thanks to all who support our lottoand thanks to all our ticket sellers.

Annual General Meeting

The Annual General Meeting willtake place on Saturday 4th Decemberat 5.00pm in the GAA Headquarters(The Convent). All members are re-quested to attend.

Bord Na Nog AGM

The Bord Na Nog AGM takes placeon Wednesday 1st December at8.00pm in the GAA Headquaters(The Convent).

County/Club draw

A draw was held at Bingo on Sundaynight for anyone who bought a €100ticket for the County/Club Draw2010. 1st prize €300 Valerie & EilishAughamore, 2nd prize €200 MickCoughlan Silverhill, 5 x €100 EamonFleming 36 Armstrong Grove, Oliver& Teresa O’Connor Kilbride Road,Oliver Hall Raheen, Margaret Flem-ing 35 Marion Square and Emma &Ciara Johnson Kilcoursey

Sponsor a Sod

Have you purchased your Sod. If notwhy not. Support your club.

“Sponsor a Sod”- Clara GAA clubwould like to invite all current andpast members (and anyone with anyconnection to the club, no matterhow tenuous!) to be part of thelaunch of the new official ClaraGAA Club website and the 'Sponsora Sod' campaign. As part of our fundraising campaign to complete thenew Championship pitch in Kil-coursey members and friends of theclub are invited to sponsor a sod onthe new pitch. Sponsors will receivea piece of the virtual pitch on a spe-cial page on our new website witheach “sod” being added piece bypiece to the page. Each “sod” can bepurchased for €20 from any commit-tee member .Log onto anclarach.comto see how our pitch is doing.

Website

Anyone wishing to put an add on thewebsite please contact any memberof the committee.

Club Notes By Email

Club Notes By Email-Anyone whowishes to recieve the club notes byemail please send your email addressto [email protected] , you will beadded to our email list and youshould recieve them every Mondaynight.

Ard Scoil Chiaran

The Junior Footballers play Tullam-ore College in the Leinster Vocation-al Schools Quarter Final on Friday26th November at 12Noon in Clara.

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Normally reports of a series ofbrawls taking place on Saturdaynight would be reported in the news,however this weekend there will beplenty of punches thrown in a verygood cause, as 26 combatants pre-pare to "Knock Out Suicide" in Ath-lone IT Sports Hall.

The event has been organised byConsole, who are a national charityworking against suicide all acrossIreland. Most parts of Offaly havebeen affected by suicide either di-rectly or indirectly in recent yearsand Doon natives Declan Rohan andPadraig Egan are among those whowill be donning some gloves and

taking a few hits in aid of the causethis Saturday.

When asked about the event, Pad-raig said that “Suicide is somethingthat has been too common aroundWest Offaly and all over Ireland inrecent years and any family that hasbeen touched by suicide knows thatit’s a tragedy that cuts very deeply.Console do some fantastic work insuicide awareness and preventionand anything we can do to help raiseawareness of their work and hope-

fully to raise some money to helpout with their efforts is worth do-ing.”

Padraig added that “Fundraisingevents like this play a vital role inkeeping Console going as only 5%of the year’s budget comes fromthe government. We know peopleare finding it tough to make endsmeet out there but it’s becausetimes are so hard for so many peo-ple that the work of a charity likeConsole becomes all the more im-portant.”

Doors open at 7.30pm this weekendwith 13 fights on the card and €20admission covers both the boxingand an afterparty in Scribes Bar withlive music until late. The event isdone in association withwhitecollarboxing.ie  who will beputting on a full professional fightnight production and will be anevent not to be missed. Anyonelooking to get tickets in advance cando so by calling Gerard Tiernan on(083) 3402461.

In the coming weeks Console willset up a community outreach pro-gramme in Athlone, this service willserve the midlands area and is de-signed for those people or familieswho would like some support andadvice from Console in areas suchas suicide prevention, awareness orbereavement support.

Last year set up 1Life (1800 24 7100) which is a 24 hour suicide pre-vention helpline.Anybody looking to contact Consolecan call 1800 201 890 or visitwww.console.ie

Knock Out Suicide

Guest bedrooms are often used forother reasons during the course ofthe year when you don’t have visi-tors staying - be it being used as ahome office, a study area, storage orperhaps it is where the treadmill iskept! But if you have visitors com-ing for the festive period, here aresome tips for ensuring your guestbedroom will make your visitorsfeel very special. And remember, itdoesn’t have to cost a fortune ortake a long time - just a few specialtouches will make all the difference.

1. Hotel TouchesIf your guests have travelled far orflown in, they may not have broughtmany toiletries or towels so somelarge fluffy towels, a spare bathrobeand some pretty soaps and sham-poos will be most appreciated.Think of what a hotel would provide- tissues, water glasses, shower caps- and provide as many as you can.

2. PicturesA guest bedroom should be a placeof comfort for guests in a homeaway from home, and making aguest bedroom relaxing and invitinginvolves more than just providingclean sheets and soft pillows on acomfortable bed. The wall decor canmake a guest bedroom look and feelas comfortable and as inviting assheets designed from fine Egyptian

cotton, and it hasthe power togreatly improve orlessen the overallappeal of the room.Using a selection offramed pictures notonly add a homelytouch, but makeyour best roomlook charming andstylish. Frames indifferent styles andsizes add aneclectic,personalized touchtoo.

3. Fresh Flowers or ScentedCandlesSince guest rooms are used onlyoccasionally, they may feel stale andstuffy. Therefore, leave thewindows open for a while. Scentedcandles or fresh flowers in the roommake it much more welcoming.

4. To read or not to read:Leaving a collection of books fromdifferent genres and/or magazinesadds a homely touch as well asproviding your guests with somereading material if they wish to readbefore going to sleep or have a lieon in the morning.

5. A Seating Area

A small desk ordressing table with atable and lampprovides a comfortablespace for your guest toapply their make-up,place their toiletries,read a book or do somework.

6. ColourIt is best to decorateyour room in a neutralcolour and style as it isgoing to be used byvarious people. Youcan change the mood

of the room with different colouredbedlinen, cushions and flowers verysimply. Blue and white can belovely fresh colours in a sparebedroom - and still be feminine ifyou use a floral design.

7. Pillows & CushionsLots of decorative cushions andpillows on the bed looks great butisn’t necessarily that practical.Provide 2 pillows per person forcomfort and a couple of cushionsthat they can use to lean against ifreading or lounging but if addingmore cushions for decorative detail,ensure there is a chair or sofa whereyour guests can place them at nightas otherwise they will just end up onthe floor!

8. StorageWe all have a habit of putting ouroff-season clothes and spare coats inthe guest bedroom wardrobe. Makesure there is some room in the ward-robe for their clothes. There isnothing worse than having to putyour clothes on flimsy clothes hang-ers so invest in some strong clotheshangers, or even better, get somescented ones to make your guestsfeel special.

9. Some little extras:Don’t forget some other accessoriesthat may be appreciated by yourguests: an alarm clock, a radio, anextra blanket in case they are cold,water glasses, some fresh fruit …..

As you can see, many of these arejust simple adjustments and addi-tions that will ensure your guestbedroom is warm, welcoming andbeautiful. Indeed, your guests maynever leave!

Lorna Sixsmith is owner of Garren-denny Lane, an online store stock-ing gifts and home accessories thatare beautiful, unusual and goodquality at competitive prices.www.garrendennylane.com

9 Ways To Make Your Guest Bedroom Inviting And Special For YourGuests This Festive Season By Lorna Sixsmith

Increase Sales, call 0504-51945

Leinster League Div 1.A

TULLAMORE 32 CILL DARA 05.With a third win in a row in the leagueTullamore have restored their reputationas one of the best teams in the league.Should they beat Dundalk away nextSunday they can climb to second in thetable.Tullamore started this floodlit match onthe attack with backs and forwards com-bining well. After less than ten minutesMick Brazil scored the opening try fol-lowing a decisive break by Dave Hanlonand good support play. In the next attackMickBrazil turned provider with a greatburst of pace and Aaron Deverell scoredthe try in the corner. Johnny Moloneyextended the lead with a penalty whenCill Dara backs were caught offside aftertwenty seven minutes. The home sidesbackline were proving to be a better at-tacking unit than their opponents and theyincreased the lead six minutes before thebreak. This time it was Colin Hughes

who broke the defensive line with hispace and offloaded in the tackle to MickBrazil for his second try of the evening.Johnny Moloney converted to leave thehome team 20-00 at the break.The second half was not as exciting as theopening forty as lead was to big for CillDara to pull back even with their hugepack. When Ivor Scully intercepted onthe half way line and raced away for aconverted try it was game over. Moloneyagain converted. Cill Dara who nevergave up got a consolation try with tenminutes left but Rory Deverell scored thefifth and final try for Tullamore near theend.A good performance all round where thepack more than matched a big Cill Daraunit and the backline were on fire. AlvinBracken, Dave Hanlon, Dave Milne andcaptain Adrian Hanley were excellent upfront with Mick Brazil, Colin Hughes andJohnny Moloney outstanding in the back-line.

TEAM; 15.Mick Brazil, 14. Colin Hugh-es, 13. Ivor Scully, 12.Aaron Deverell,11.Mark Whelan, 10. Johnny Moloney,9.Richie Hughes, 1. Steve McQuaid, 2.Cathal Feighery, 3. Alvin Bracken, 4.Dave Hanlon, 5. Ivor Deverell, 6.DaveHanlon, 7. Cyril Cornally, 8. AdrianHanley(Capt)Replacements used; Kevin Browne, GerMolloy, Daire O’Beirne, Paul McNiff andRory Deverell.

Leinster Seconds League Div 1.ATULLAMORE 9 CILL DARA 7Tullamore were fortunate to win thisgame thanks to a late penalty from John-ny Butler. If they had lost they wouldhave no one to blame except the mistakesthey made themselves in set pieces andopen play. The result leaves them in thirdplace and like the 1st team they can gosecond with a win in Dundalk next Sun-day.Tullamore took an early lead with a But-ler penalty after eight minutes but all thegood early work was undone midwaythrough the first half. Tullamore lost alinout and the Cill Dara forward had aclear run for the line from the 22 and thetry was converted. Just before half timeJohnny Butler narrowed the gap to onepoint with a penalty.Both sides missed difficult kicks in thesecond half in the rapidly fading light.After the referee requested the turning onof the lights with fifteen minutes remain-ing so to did the home sides fortune im-prove as they dominated play for theremainder. They inexplicably ran a penal-ty but were saved with Butlers late kick.Ciaran McNeill led by example and hewas well supported up front by KeithCleary, Paul McNiff and Daire O’ Beirnewith young No 9 Ger Wynne improvingwith every game, Chris Gethings veryreliable at the back and the boot of John-ny Butler deciding the result on the day.TEAM; 15. Chris Gethings, 14. AidanRyan, 13.Rory Deverell, 12.Niall Kane,11. Brian O’Reilly, 10.Johnny Butler, 9.

Ger Wynne, 1. Ger Molloy, 2. KevinBrowne, 3. Keith Cleary, 4.John Connol-ly, 5.David Molyneux, 6.Daire O’Beirne,7. Ciaran McNeill(Capt), 8. Paul McNiff,Replacements used;Nick Berry, KevinGarry,Eoin Kerin, Fearghal O’Mahonyand Danny Madden.

NEXT WEEKEND;SATURDAY; U-13 Tullamore v Dun-dalk Leinster Premier League @ 12.30pm U-15 Tullamore v Dun-dalk Leinster Premier League @ 12.30pm U-17 Dundalk v Tullam-ore Leinster premier League @ 11.00am U-19 Dundalk v Tullam-ore Leinster Premier League @ 11.00amSUNDAY ; Dundalk v Tullamore Lein-ster League Div 1.A @ 2.30pm Dundalk 2nds v Tullamore2nds Leinster Seconds League @ 1.00pm 3rds Tullamore v Athy Lein-ster Prov 3rds League @ 2.30pm

Ireland v SamoaTullamore Rugby Club had 280 Youthsand Minis players with parents at thematch last Saturday, 13th November, inthe new Aviva Stadium. Five buses leftSpollenstown at 11.30am.

What started as an idea to sell some of theexcess tickets for the Samoa game snow-balled due to the extremely good value of€25 per ticket, including the bus and thenovelty of visiting the brilliant new homeof Irish Rugby.

The club was so overwhelmed with thedemand that they had to source ticketsfrom other clubs to meet the excess appli-cations received. In the end everybodywho applied was looked after.

Tullamore U-17 team went one better andorganised a game in Dublin against Guin-ness before heading to Lansdowne Road.

The reports back were that everybody had

Tullamore Rugby ReportThe first bus load before leaving Spollenstown (Ireland v Samoa)

A group of the U-15s before leaving the club grounds.

Chris YoungComputer Specialist

086 8150890

Small Businesses and HomesInternet Networking Repairs

Security Websites

Dermot GuinanMini-Bus Hire

14 & 26 SeaterAvailable

All OccasionsCatered For

086-254 5189 or 057-9135 270

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Train the Brain and BehaviourWith Filtered Sound Training

To learn more,please contactMary Murphy

F.S.T. Practitioner

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Raymond HeavinSpecialising in:

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Mobile: 087 1326712

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• TEAM TRAINING • TEAM BONDING• TEAM BUILDING DAYS

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Tel: 057 936 8913Mob: 087 264 9401

www.asp-ireland.ie Email: [email protected]

Advanced Sports Performance Ireland

Clara U-14 County Champions 2010

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SEAN ÓG’SHACKNEY SERVICE

Contact: Sean Óg086-8882262

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ELY’SBANAGHERELECTRICAL

Main Street, Banagher, Co. Offaly • Tel: 057 9151080

Everything Electrical

Annagh, Birr

Metal RecyclingThink Recycling, The Possibilities Are Endless

Phone 090 - 97 39098 mbl: 086 0850263Fax. 090 - 97 39177.

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Tel: 087 2605693Work Guaranteed,

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Repairs Punctures“As they happen”

PuncturePuncture Preventative& Tyre Life ExtenderIreland Ltd.

• Works for any tyre• Reduce running costs by 5c a litre• Extends the tyre life by up to 40%

LOCAL SERVICES - LOCAL SERVICES

RYAN PUMPSPump Installation and Service

Fergus Ryan 087-9144568

Services include: - Water Well Pumps

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Dooley’s Pre-Cast ConcreteLentils. Panel Fencing, Pillars, Cills,

Slabs, Septic Tanks, Bio Cycle Tanks,Kerbs, Fountains, Flower Pots,Brick Paving, Limestone Slabs

Phone/Fax: 0505 22132Contact John: 086 6000 188

Contact Patrick: 086 3039239Delivery Service Available

Tim RyanMonumental Sculptor

HEADSTONESLimestone, Marble & GraniteIrish Celtic CrossesStone Cleaning & Inscriptions

Templederry, NenaghTel: (087) 270 3615 & (086) 192 1554Email: [email protected]

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uirwayAutomationS

Philip Quirke086-2799838

Secure your Premises withAutomatic Gates

A closed gate is a great deterrent to keepunwanted intruders away

• Gates Supplied & Automated• GSM Gate Openers• DIY Gate Kits• CCTV Systems

William BuckleySpecialist in Wall

& Floor TilingCeramic, Mosaic, Quarry & Vinyl

1 Esker Court, Clara, Co. Offaly087-6601101 or 057-9330124

Weddings086-8230506

057-9121047Contact Camillus King

Castle Video& Photography

Castle Video& Photography

Proprietors: Marie & Bernie

The Arch, Unit 2, Green StreetBirr, Co. Offaly

Tel: 057 9121411

Specialising in Roman blindsAll types of Rollers and Venetians

Made to measure curtains orre-vamp your old curtains

Curtaindesign:iol.ie

- Construction Supervision- Project Management- Cost Consultant

Fully Insured and IndemnifiedPhone: 090 6453787Mob: 087 9202188

Ciaran Grogan Engineering Services

Brophy Plumbing & Heating

Carrig, Birr

087 2768148 067 [email protected]

Renewable EnergySolar Panels

Underfloor HeatingOil, Gas, Solid Fuel

Control Heating Systems

Killeen Bearings& Motor Factors Ltd

Bearings • Belts • Chains • OilTools • Filters • Shocks

KilleenBirrCo. Offaly

Tel: 057 91 20456Mbl: 087 686 2814Fax: 057 91 20985

MARY’S FOOT HEALTH CLINICTake your first steps to healthy feet

Do you suffer discomfort from………Corns; Callus & or cracked heelsAthlete’s foot; Ingrown toe nailsFungal & thickened nails; VerrucasUnable to cut your nails.

Mobile clinicavailable onrequest

MARY MURPHY S.A.C. Dip FHPT S.A.C. Dip FHPPRegistered Member of the Irish Chiropodists/Podiatrists Organisation Ltd

To an appointment Contact Mary on (086)3519416

TOM TURNER & SONSVW, Audi & Mercedes Specialists

Motor Engineer

www.tomturnerandsons.com 087-7644365

Service & RepairsNCT Pre-TestMotor Caravan DOE Pre-TestsCamper Conversions

BENNY LARKIN

Riverstown, Birr, Co. Offaly

(05791) 21580086 8727618

• FITTED KITCHENS• STAIR CASES• SASH WINDOWS

Dumpers • Diggers • Rollers • Water PumpsMixers • Cherrypickers • Pokers • P/Floats

Email: [email protected] Web: www.premiertoolhire.ie

Premier Industrial Equipment Ltd

Banagher, Co. Offaly087 6176472Office - 057 52982

Crinkle Birr 057 9120103

Ceramic Tiles & Wood Floors

Contact Alison or JohnTel: 057-9122 675

mbl: 087-798 3034Swag St., Crinkle,

Birr, Co. Offaly

Semi-Solidstarting from

€10.99sq. yd.

Professional FittingAvailableFloor Tiles

starting from€6.99sq. yd.

Wall Tilesstarting from€7.50sq. yd.

FREE Measure& Quote

AJJA Jones Brothers

Call now for yourFREE Quotation

087-794 6254 / 087-224 1504

High Quality FinishComputerised Drawings

Specialise in Design & Fitting

Dunkerrin

Fitted Furniture, Kitchens, Bedrooms

www.jonesbrotherskitchens.ieNew ShowroomCome see our

Treacy TyresPortumna

New services now availablePre NCT Check

• Brake pads• Shocks• Oil Change• Lights Focused• Wiper Blades090 9741294 / 087 2573179

Because it is through repetition that you establishyour credibility, establish brand familiarity and

become the first thought when a needfor your type of product or service arises.

Repetition is an importantpart of Advertising

Why?

A1 Chimney Sweep& Gutter Cleaning

Service

Brush & VacuumNO Mess

Contact Martin 087-9616098

Roscrea Rd, Templemore, Co. Tipperary

John 086-8338896 or 0504-31502

Myles 086-3679953

M&H CADDY CARS

Micro Lite

AGENTS FOR:

Classic Lite

Buy 5get 1 FREE

When you pre pay for 5 adsyou get 1 Free

Call 0504-51945 NOW to avail of this Special Offer.

Flo-Screed

TERRY NAYLORCONCRETE PRODUCTS• Fast efficient way to pour your concrete finished floors• Ideal for underfloor heating• Up to 300sqm poured in a day

Self Levelling concrete FlooringSupplied and layed

Phone: 0579139037 Fax: 057 9139974 Mobile: 087 2758311

For ads that get noticed, not lost, call 0504-51945

Situations Vacant

Avon are recruiting representatives in allareas, no start up costs, contact Margaret086-0234484 iss11-16

Counselling

In Time....offers couselling for Bereave-ment, Rape/Sexual Assault, Anxiety,Work and School Related Stress, OCD(Obssesive CompulsiveDisorder), PostNatal Depression, Loneliness andmore....Life Coaching.... Looking atways to improve your life, Setting goalsand achieving them by unleashing thereal you. Contact Tammy Spain, DipC.S.C.T. Counsellor, Phone 0509 25805Mobile: 086 0648454 Email:[email protected], Birr

Professional counselling available in theThurles area. The service covers generalcounselling, bereavement, suicide be-reavement, stress, anxiety, self-esteem,relationship difficulties and couplescounselling. Qualification recognised bythe Irish Association for Counselling andPsychotherapy (IACP). Some eveningappointments available. ph Jim O Shea087-8211 009 www.jimoshea.net

Financial ServicesNeed advice on mortgages,clearing debt,life assurance costs,health cover etc con-tact Eamonn Walsh now 086-0471147iss145

GardeningMini Chip Garden Bark , Top quality 75litre Bags, Wholesale Price, can deliverBoomerang 0504 90402/ 087 9042625

Health & BeautyPsychic reading (Midlands 103), healing,hypnotherapy, EFT, Bernie 086-3688583, Meadow View House, Durrow,Laois. Iss13

Rahanni Celestial Healing, Level 1. Oneday training, Sat 30th october, 10.30-4pm. Level 2, Saturday 6th november,10.30-4pm. Bernie 086-3688583Iss9Then takeout

Make-Up Artist. Carmel Ryan is a free-lance make-up artist, based in Roscrea,Co. Tipperary. she specialises in make-up for debs and bridal parties. For yourwedding, she offers a mobile service inthe comfort and privacy of your ownhome. Mobile: 087-2773351 iss150

To RentCommercial/Storage Units to rent, Dur-row, Tullamore, Co. Offaly. Tel: 087-9866000

Turf / FirewoodVariable sizes of truck loads of grade Ablack hopper turf, ash and beech sea-soned firewood, peat for cattle bedding,gardening, etc. Deliveries to nenagh andBorrisokane every Thurs. And Friday.Phone 087-1413236 iss16

WeddingsComplete Wedding Album or storybook, 3 DVDs of all the wedding. Music- Djs - Singalong Karaoke, photos taken.Also video conversion, duplicates. 087-2606110 or 0909 643045

“You’ve a much better chance of selling it closer to home!would You travel to West Cork to buy a used telly?

........neither would I!”

(For up to 25 words. Over 25 words add .25c per wordHighlight your classified ad with a colour background €10

Place a box around your ad and include photo €20Payments by Credit Card or Laser - Minimum of €10

Classified Ads €5 per issue (line adverts)

You can pay for all ads byCredit Card or Laser

To place a classified ad post ad with payment to:Laois Offaly Tatler, Curraghgraigue,

Borrisoleigh, Co. Tipperary

Bonhams for Sale Beautiful multi-col-oured piglets for sale. Outdoor breed.Thriving well. Male and female. Tel;086 4021659

Sell Your Stuff!This size ad + photo

€20

Phone 0504-51945Email: [email protected]

Need Extra Cash?Clear out your atticEmpty Your Shed

Sell it Fast inThe Laois Offaly Tatler

RecruitmentSales Agents Wanted

Have you experience in Advertising Sales?We’d like to talk to you.

Email: [email protected] [email protected]

Or phone 086-3191673 / 0504-51945

Must have a passion to help businessessucceed by explaining the benefits of advertising andunderstanding their needs, while creating a solution

suited to the business and the budget.

Could You SellThis Space?

If The Answer is Yes,Then Get in Touch

The Laois Offaly Tatler is published by the Tipp Tatler which has been operatingsuccessfully for over 8 years. We pride ourselves on consistently delivering realresults to our loyal advertisers. If you think you can help businesses in your areaincrease sales and grow profits, then please contact us. Your County needs you!

Tiles & Timber Flooring Ltd.

Professional fitting service available

|Presented by: Mike GavinTel/Fax: 057 9122985

Mike: 087 6680668 Jacinta: 087 2986652Mill Street, Birr, Co. Offaly

Large range of tiles and timber floorsAvailable,

Solid Doors available.

Free Quotation Free Delivery

CoSteel Sheds & GaragesAll sizesMaintenance FreeDelivered and Erected

087-796 4298 / 087-983 2832

Crestsembroidered

or printed

Your ideaHERE!

T-shirts • Hoodies • SweatshirtsPolo & Rugby Shirts • Jackets

Corporate • WorkwearHen & Stag Night • BirthdaysPersonalised GiftsSchool Club CrestsPremiership Jersey No's

Kevin Mahon Ph: 086 8776737

PRINT & EMBROIDERYee

Phone/Fax 067 31083 Mbl: 086 8353197Web: www.Ballinwearprecast.comEmail [email protected]

Sills Lintels Kerbing Patio Slabs

Post & Panel Fencing Wall & Pier Capping Septic Tanks Ornamental Garden

Products

Ballinwear Pre-Cast Concrete Ltd.Display Area Now Open 7 Days

Roof Cladding Availableall colours, all lengths available nowWe do a full range of Flashings and

Accessories, PVC or PolyesterReady to Erect Sheds, Made to Order

Box Profile & corrugated available in all lengthsNationwide delivery Ph: 087-9390661

Noel KileenRoofing SuppliesBetween Birr and Portumna

Roscrea GlazingManufacturers of Double Glazed Unit

Coveringall areas of

North and South Tipperary

Phone:0505-47450 Fax:0505-47151

[email protected] 1 Industrial Estate,Shinrone, Birr

All Trees,Tree Plants& Hedging

Whitethorn & Beech Hedging etc. etc.

24hr service

www.irishshamrocktrees.com

Irish Shamrock Trees

Ring John anytime 087-274 3914

Michael MorkanGroomer,

Member of IPDGA

Tel: 0505 47239 Mob: 087 9692992Pick up service locally

ROSCREA Rd., Shinrone, Birr, Co. [email protected] Web: www.headsntails.ie

Heads ‘n TailsHeads ‘n TailsDog Grooming and Boarding KennelsDog Grooming and Boarding Kennels

CANGORT MEMORIALS

Cangort Park, Shinrone, Co. OffalyTel: 087 8475307 / 086 6075415

MEMORIALS FOR LOVED ONES

• Headstones of distinction erected countrywide• Quality cleaning serviceAll work completed without delay

YOUNG’SRECOVERY

SERVICE24 Hour Nationwide

Recovery Service

TemplemoreCo. TipperaryPh: 0504-31333

Mob: 087-2561835Mob: 086-2561835

TECHNOLOGY SOLVED

ComputerTroubleshooters

• Laptop & PC Repairs • Internet, Email• Virus Control • Networks, Wireless• Clean up, Speed up • New Systems Supplied• Websites • Call Out Available

Tony Monaghan, Tel: 057 9341603Tullamore Mob: 087 2305385

Solid Fuel - Turf / Firewood

Full / Half Lorry LoadsGood Quality Dry Seasoned Hopper

Turf / Firewood Available in BagsVariable Size Loads

(Offaly) 087-0904953 (Tipp) 087-1413238

Counselling & PsychotherapyFeeling depressed, anxiety, stress,

Relationship problems...?Need someone to talk to

in confidence?

Contact Nora: 087-7453870

BLINDS & CURTAINSRoller, Wood, Venetian & Vertical

Readymade & Made-To-Measure CurtainsWide Range to Choose from

& Best Price Around

Fitting & Measuring Service ProvidedP.J. & Breda Jones, Moneygall

0505-45287 / 087-2717465 / 087-2593111

Birr Carpets & Furnishings Ltd.Complete Home FurnishingsFitting Service Available

Free DeliveryOpening Hours:10.00am-6.00pmSix days a week

Main Street, Birr, Co. OffalyTel/Fax: 057 9120766

WIXTED ELECTRICALNew Builds • Extensions • Renovations

(Prop: James Wixted)Templemore, Co. Tipperary. Maintenance Contractors

C2 Reg, Fully InsuredFREE QUOTATIONS

086 - 3958 694

Domestic - Commercial - Industrial

Killion Garden Centre

5 mins from Birr on Kinnity Road

057-912 0974Summer Bedding, Patio Plants, Window Boxes, Wall Baskets,

Large Selection Of Pre-Planted Hanging Baskets,Pots and Grave Tubs or your own Refilled.

Shrubs, Trees, Perennials, Roses, Etc.Landscaping & Garden Maintenance

Smyths Sand & Gravel LTD.Suppliers of Ready Mixed Concrete

PROMPT DELIVERY

Washed Sand & Gravel, Broken Stone,Washed Drainage Chippings, Claus 804,

Lego Block Wall and Floor Screed Now Available

Tel: 057 91 20156 / 25659Mobile: 087 2597993 / 8339632 Fax: 057 91 20164

Email: [email protected] Tinlough, Carrig, Birr

O’Moore Street,Tullamore, Co. OffalyTel: 085 738 5772

Open: Tues - Fri: 10am - 5pm & Sat: 10am - 2pm

DRESSMAKING & ALTERATIONS

Evening Appointments Available for Bridal,Graduation & Occasional Wear

Bridal Wear, Graduation Dresses,Wedding Outfits, Evening Wear

Buy 5get 1 FREE

When you pre pay for 5 adsyou get 1 Free

Call 0504-51945 NOW to avail of this Special Offer.

LOCAL SERVICES - LOCAL SERVICES

Sudoku for Kids!Every row, column and minigrid must contain the numbers1 through 4.  Don’t guess  use logic!

Increase Sales, call 0504-51945

Cryptic Crossword

Grow Your Business!Call the Offaly Tatler today

& Promote Your Business throughoutCo Offaly. Phone 087-6258475 / 0504-51945

“Trying to doBusiness without

Advertising islike winking at

A girl in the dark.You know

you’re doing it,but no oneelse does”

Phone today toBook your ad,

Tel:Fiona 087-6258475Office 0504-51945

E: [email protected]

Solution to crossword in last issue (No.10)

3 14 2

3 2 2 2

ACROSS1. Rang, lad can come over the navigation from the River Barrowto Dublin. (5,5)6. Sounds like giant simian King was in Mayo village of antiqui-ties with a famous cross. (4)9. Ah, line up to take the air. (6)10. I set us up to get a thin paper. (6)12. Leaves, go if ale is disturbed. (7)13. Tram in difficulties in Ulster linen town where the Six MileWater enters Lough Neagh. (6)16. Shuffle a high card, Alec, for famous holy antiquity found inLimerick ring fort in 1868. (6,7)21. Sounds like beer will make you ill! (3)22. If Colm, of fresh disposition, goes to Clare he will see sheer700 feet drop to the sea near Liscannor. (6,2,5)25. "Instead of language we have ------, instead of principles, slo-gans" Eric Bentley. (6)27. Fun race around the fiery chamber. (7)29. Too wise seemingly, to surround nobleman on an annual basis.(6)31. Put a stop to northern article on fruit. (6)32. Sneem lyrics include reference to Tipperary village, once a di-ocesan cathedral town. (4)33. Biker's been over to principal West Cork town of the fightingMacEgans on the River Ilen. (10)

DOWN1. Derg lineage includes a Limerick village with castle, seat of theFitzgerald Knights. (4)2. Make a dash for pretty Wicklow village on the main Dublin toWicklow road near the Devil's Glen. (7)3. Devil about to start digging. (7)4. Run back to the South East and take care. (5)5. "I'm fast. I'm a bad ---. God will strike me dead. I'm seventeen.I'll go to hell." Dylan Thomas. (3)7. Sob ever about being able to see. (7)8. Leaner, glum. (anag.) Wicklow beauty spot where Fiach Ma-cHugh defeated the English in 1580. (10)

11. No, I return as charged. (3)14. Jo, see McJay about Dublin writer (1882-1941) who broughtLeopold Bloom to life for a famous day. (5,5)15. "Moral indignation is jealousy with a ----." H.G. Wells (4)17. Some of it plus the rest of it is this of it! (3)18. Face up to where you might eat out. (4)19. Not hers in Garnish Island. (3)20. Administration boss seen shortly in Joyce Organisation. (1.1.1.)22. Dog end? Cut it short! (7)23. And team is upset, but has the authority to act. (7)24. Cheer at digging up about two and a half acres. (7)26. Fuel rating zero forty nine. (3)26. Party-loving American soldier has mushrooms for example. (5)28. Arts graduate goes west and north to see ancient Irish protectedcattle enclosure. (4)30. "..and his heart was going like mad and --- I said ---, I will ---"James Joyce. (3)

There are only three types of people in the world:those who can count and those who can't. - Anonymous

(continued from previous issue)

Grief – A Creative Response

I have written a considerable number ofarticles on bereavement and grief so far.This will be my last one on that topic. Iam conscious that I have not touched onhow families, children, teenagers andelderly people grieve. If any readerswish me todeal with any of these, pleasecontact the Tipp Tatler and I will be gladto do so.

To conclude this set of articles, I wouldlike to say that there are many ways ofhelping yourself to grieve. Writing aletter to the deceased is a good one,keeping a journal to record yourthoughts and feelings is another, paint-ing or drawing is also an excellent wayof expressing emotions. You don’t haveto be an artist by the way. Colour is themain ingredient. Your instinct will tellyou what colour to use. Poetry is also avery good way to vent grief. I wouldlike to conclude with one of my owngrief poems.

Cathal

The lights of Christmas make me sad,for they remind me of my dead child

who was a light in my lifeand who passed from me

like a candlequenched by the cruel fingers of fate.

Oh, how I hate to think of it.That child reminded me

of mewhen I was young and carefree,

wild, quiet,full of mischief and of glee,

blushing with the bashfulness of inno-cence.

He was to memyself.

Six Christmases have come and goneWith each the easing of my pain,

but all the same, the memories remain,and live within me,

and I see him every day.I always fear that somehow

in the distance of timesince he was placed in the cold earth,

alone,waiting fo rme to come

and join him in eternal sleep,that I will forget the sound of his voice.

And every day I listen carefullyto ensure that it remains with me.

For the voice is the sign of the spirit,it is the essence of the inner soul.

And his voice was soft as silk,like the music of the rain in Spring

it falls upon my hardened heart.And no! I will not forget,

as long as breath remains within me,that lovely sound

which echoed in our livesfor thirteen short Summers

before it died.

I composed this poem as I drove intothe town of Thurles on Friday 20th ofDecember 1996, almost 7 years afterCathal’s death. I had celebrated theend of term with my staff and was in ahappy mood. Then, without warning,the bright Christmas lights of Thurlesreminded me of the darkness that haddescended upon our household in Feb-ruary 1990, following a joyful Christ-mas when Cathal had presented us witha lovely fruit bowl. It must have takenhim a long time to save that much mon-ey from his frugal pocket money. I feelmy tears anew as I contemplate hisgenerosity. And I still remember thesoft sound of his voice.

(continued in next issue)

Jim O’Shea works as a counsellor fromFurze, Thurles. Ph. 087 8211009www.jimoshea.net . JimO’Shea’s book‘When a child dies. Footsteps of aGrieving Family’ is published by Ver-itas. The royalties from this book willgo tosthe Children’s Hospital in Crum-lin.

Counselling

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The Miraculous Prayer –Dear Heart of Jesus, in the past I’ve asked formany favours. This time I ask You this veryspecial one (mention favour). Take it DearHeart of Jesus and place it within Your ownbroken heart where Your Father sees it. Thenin His merciful eyes it will become Yourfavour, not mine. Amen. Say this prayer for 3days, promise publication and favour will begranted. Never known to fail. U.G..The Miraculous Prayer –Dear Heart of Jesus, in the past I’ve asked formany favours. This time I ask You this veryspecial one (mention favour). Take it DearHeart of Jesus and place it within Your ownbroken heart where Your Father sees it. Thenin His merciful eyes it will become Yourfavour, not mine. Amen. Say this prayer for 3days, promise publication and favour will begranted. Never known to fail. E.F.St. Therese of LisieuxO Glorious St. Therese, whomalmighty God has raised up to aidand inspire the human family. Iimplore your miraculousintercession. You are so powerful inobtaining every need of body and

spirit from the heart of God. Holy MotherChurch proclaims you, Prodigy ofMiracles”The Greatest Saint of ModernTimes” Now I fervently beseech you toanswer my petition. (mention here) tocarry out your promise of spendingheaven doing good upon earth, of lettingfall from heaven a shower of roses.Henceforth dear Little Flower, I will fulfilyour plea ‘to be made knowneverywhere’ and I will never cease tolead others to Jesus, through you, Amen.St. Therese of the Child Jesus, live in theheart of the church. Pray for me. Say for9 days and you will receive a flowerduring or after 9 days, as an indicationthat your request will be granted. M.M.

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By Jim O’SheaBereavement and grieving

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