Information about the befriender service

Befrienders Informatio

n for

Parents

Three levels of service

.

• Playground Befrienders

• Listening friends

• Peer mediators

Playground Befrienders

• Work on a rota• Wear high visibility jackets in the playground• Stop playing and listen if a child approaches

them for help• Help the child think about how they want to

resolve the problem• Keep an eye on the Buddy Bench and make

sure children who are sitting there are listened to

• Ensure an adult is aware of issues arising• Seek urgent support from an adult if someone

has been hurt

Listening Friends

• Work on a rota during Golden Time to listen to children who want to talk about a problem

• Are trained to listen well and to ask open questions to encourage others to talk

• Support children to think about how they would like to solve their own problems

• Encourage children to feel safe to involve adults

• Ensure the responsible adults knows about any issues raised

• Immediately refer any problems where a child is being hurt to the responsible adults

Peer mediators

• Are trained to understand conflict • Help children to listen to each other in a calm

way so that they can hear what the problem sounds and feels like from a different perspective

• Support children to work through a problem solving process within which they work out the solution collaboratively

• Do not take sides and do not solve the problem for the children

• Ensure adults are aware of the problems and immediately refer issues of concern to the adults

Conflict is an inescapable and essential part of life, diversity and change.

Successful conflict resolution is a problem-solving exercise, which involves achieving win-win outcomes.

Disagreements happen – it’s important to teach children how to deal with them in a constructive way.

Conflict

      “If you want to make peace, you don't talk to your friends. You talk to your enemies.”

  Mother Teresa

Ending conflict is all about restoring good relationships

Peer Mediation

• Children talk face to face in a safe and supportive discussion led by trained peer mediators.

• The process is organized, structured, and systematic and aimed at producing positive actions and outcomes.

• Peer Mediation does not take the place of normal consequences when inappropriate behavior has occurred

• A structured process in which a neutral third party assists voluntary participants in resolving their conflicts.

Peer Mediation• Peer mediators will learn skills that will help

defuse conflict between fellow pupils by: helping pupils engaged in conflict to hear one

another, look for shared interests, develop an effective agreement, and help that agreement be implemented.

• There is always an adult nearby when peer mediation takes place.

Befrienders is NOT about:

Deciding who’s ‘wrong’ or ‘right’.

Allocating blame.

Giving advice.

What situation can be Befriended?

Arguments

Teasing

Name-calling

Rumours

Conflict with peers

Verbal exchanges

Misunderstandings

Horseplay

Which situations should be referred to adults immediately?

Issues that involve sensitive information

Issues that involve the police

When the dispute involves an adult

When one or both parties have a history with bullying or violence

Racist Issues

Befrienders helps pupils toDefine a problem from their point of viewIdentify and express their feelings and

needsHear the feelings and needs of the other

personAcknowledge each others viewpointCreate solutionsAgree a course of actionEvaluate progress

What are the benefits of Befrienders for the school?

1. Befrienders helps to further promote a positive classroom environment and school culture.

2. Gives teachers even more time to teach, and pupils time to learn.

3. Helps to ensure problems are not left unresolved.

What are the benefits for the Befrienders?

1. Befrienders practice listening and communication skills

2. Befrienders learn to work effectively in a team

3. Befrienders develop more empathy and compassion and learn to listen to things from different perspectives

Befriender TrainingInterpersonal relationships

active listening skills, facilitating discussions, step by step process

Collaborative styleexplore alternatives, identify issuesthink about consequences and how they will

affect the relationship

Signposts in Peer Mediation

This is the process of peer mediation:•Peer mediators introduce themselves, set the ground rules and make the promise; everyone is treated with respect, everyone gets a chance to be heard fairly.•They listen to each in turn and invite them to share with each other how they felt about each other. •They will then invite people to find a solution or way forward and fix an agreement.