Implementing Focusing with Kindergarten Students in an ... fileImplementing Focusing with Kindergarten Students ... for learning emotional intelligence skills. ... and I used my communication

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ImplementingFocusingwithKindergartenStudentsinanElementarySchoolByDianeBaumgart,PhDIbeganmycertificationprocessinInner‐relationshipFocusingwithanintentiontouseFocusingwithadults.However,inHelenBrenner’sFocusingCourse“Goforit”,IfoundIhadapassiontoconductfocusingwithchildren.Iwasvolunteeringasamentorwithchildrenattheelementaryandmiddleschoollevel.Whilevolunteeringduringanoonrecesswithayoungboy,Ihadtheopportunitytoresolveaseriousconflict.IreachedadecisionthatdayformyFocusingproject.IwouldfollowmypassiontodoFocusingwithchildreninanelementarypublicschool.IapproachedthePrincipalandSchoolCounseloratanelementaryschoolinOctoberaboutFocusing.IhadpreviouslyvolunteeredatthisschoolasaMentorandhaddonesomeprofessionalconsultationinthisdistrictinyearspastandgainedapositiveprofessionalhistorywithbothoftheseadministrators.IcalledthePrincipalwhowaspositiveabouttheFocusingidea,whothenreferredmetotheschoolcounselor.IsentaflyertothecounselorproposingascenarioofstudentsnotcompletingandturningintheirhomeworkasanissueforFocusing.IdiscussedFocusingasaskillsprogramforlearningemotionalintelligenceskills.Shewascautiouslyenthusiastic.WemetinDecember,thelastdaybeforewinterbreak,andagreedtobeginFocusingsessionsintheschool.ThisdiscussionwascrucialfordelineatingtheparametersoftheprojectandourmutualunderstandingofwhatandhowFocusingwouldoccur.ThecounselorandIcametoanunderstandingonissuesandconcernswiththeproposedproject.Theseincluded

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1. WhatisFocusingandwhatistherelationshipbetweenFocusingandEmotionalIntelligenceskills?

2. Studentswhomightbenefitandstudentswhoteachersmightrecommend:

3. AssurancesthatFocusingwasaskillsprogramnottherapyoratreatmentprogram;

4. Issuesofpullingchildrenfromacademicinstruction;5. Liabilityandconfidentialityissues;6. SupervisionofFocusingsessions;7. EvaluationofstudentsocialskillandFocusingskillacquisitioninsessions;

8. Socialskillsandteacherlistsofrequestedbehavioralchangesofthestudents;

9. Thetransitioninclassroomclimatechangeforstudentsfromtheiracademictofocusingclassroom;and

10.Mycommitmenttoconductingacertificationproject,notaresearchproject.

IlistthesequestionsnotbecauseIwaspreparedinadvancetoansweroraskthembutbecauseIwasreadytodiscussthemastheyarose.Myknowledgeoftheeducationsystem,myworkwithteachersandstudents,andmyteachingexperienceandcertificationprograminInner‐relationshipFocusingpreparedmetohavethediscussioninacasualandopenmanner.Iwassurprisedthediscussiononthelastissue,#9above,seemedtobethegreenlightfortheproject.Withoutthatknowledgeandexperiencewemayhaveproceededbutnotasconfidently.WeendedthisDecembermeetingwithanagreementtobeginFocusingwithkindergartenstudentsinMarchandmeetinlateFebruarytosharesomeinformationonchildrenandmyFocusinglessonplans.MyProfessionalPreparationinEducation

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IhaveadoctorateinBehavioralSciencefromtheUniversityofWI‐Madisonandworkedwithchildren,youthandadultsfor30plusyearsinavarietyofeducationalsettings.ThechildrenselectedfortheFocusingsessionshavechallengingbehaviors,butmyexperienceandprofessionalpreparationencompassestheseandawiderspanofbehaviors.For20plusyearsIprofessionallydesignedcommunicationsystemsforchildrenandyouthwhoarenon‐verbalandchallengethesystemwithbehaviors.Iamusedtolookingfordisruptionsduringroutinesasexpressionsofcommunicationintents.AlthoughtheseFocusingsessionswerenotexplicitlydesignedforcommunication,Ioftenseeandlistento“behaviorascommunication”(Baumgart,Johnson,Helmstetter,1990).Forexamplescreamingandpushingcouldbeusedtosay“NO“or“STOP”,grabbingcouldbeusedtosay“WANT”or“MORE”.Slammingdoorscouldexpress“Iamreallyangry”.Notjudgingthebehaviorasinappropriateandproposingsomecommunicationintentallowsahypothesistofromonapotentialcommunicationintentunderlyingthebehaviorandaneducationalresponse.IwasconductingFocusingsessions(usingthetermEmotionalIntelligenceskillswithteachers)andIusedmycommunicationtrainingtosupportmyteachingandreactionsinthesessions.FocusingGroupParametersThecounselorsetuptheFocusingsessions.Thescheduleincludedtwogroupsofkindergartenstudentswhowereselectedbytheteachers.Onegroupof5(laterexpandedto6)from8:50‐9:10andanothergroupof5(alsoexpandedto6)met1:00‐1:20.Iwasprovidedalistofstudents’firstnamesandbehaviorsstillnotwithintherepertoireofeachstudentafter6monthsofsocialskillstraining(SkillsforSocialandAcademicSuccess,Kindergartentothirdgrade,2011).

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Teachersdescribedthesechildrenasperformingsignificantlybehindtheiragepeersinsocialskillsandacademicbehaviors.Thecounselorscheduledthecounselor’sofficeforconductingsessions.Itcontainedadesk,bookshelves,credenza,anadultsizedlargeroundtable,playmaterials,andeightadultchairs.Littlemovementwaspossibleinthespace.The20‐minutesallocatedincludedthetransitionfromtwodifferentclassroomsandthelibrarytotheofficedownlonghalls.IfeltthistimeallocatedleftlittletimeforFocusingwithstudents!FocusingSessionStructureThechildrenareusedtopuppetscenarioswiththeirSocialSkills2cdStepcurriculum.Iobservedskitsandrole‐playsconductedbythecounselorinclassroomsusingthiscurriculum.Theclassroomstudentsattendedtothepuppets,skitsandinteractedwiththepuppetsandeachotheralthoughIdidnotobservethestudentsselectedforFocusingintheseclassrooms.Ifeltcontinuingwithpuppetswasanexcellentoption.Iwroteanddesignedscenariosandskitswhereonepuppethastheroleof“wiseone”andoneortwopuppetstakeontherolesofhavinga“problem”behaviororissueandexpressingcertainfeelings.Iplannedonbeingawitness,participant,facilitatorandcommentatorratherthantheteacher.AllieandRocky(alligatorpuppetandraccoonpuppet)arethetwocharactersinskitsandMs.Cowistheknowledgeable“wiseone”puppet.Ipurchasedthesepuppetsatthelocalthriftstorefor$0.50eachandsanitizedthem.Thescenarios,skits,materialsusedandreflectionsoneachsessionareinBaumgart,D.FocusingActivitiesforKindergartenStudents(2015).InitialFocusingPlansFocusingisaskillsprogram,“abody‐orientedprocessofself‐awarenessandemotionalhealing”(A.WeiserCornell,1996).

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EmotionalIntelligenceinvolvesperceiving,understandingandregulatingemotionstopromoteemotionalandintellectualgrowth(Salovey&Meyer,1990).ThetermEmotionalIntelligenceisusedintheeducationalfieldandIusedittointroducemysessionplanstoteachersandtaughtFocusingskillsandusedthewordFocusingwiththestudents.ItaughtInner‐relationshipFocusingskills.IdidnotwanttobeginFocusingbyrelyingonstudentstoexpresstheirfeelings.Theirfeelingsmaynotbereadilysensedinthebody,theymaygorightintoastoryand/oritmaynotbeorfeelsafetorevealsomesensationsorfeelings.Idecidedtouseactivitiesthatmightelicitsensations,emotions,orfeelingsinthechildren.Ibeganwithalistofcomfortablefeelings(e.g.feelinghappy,helpful,generous,pleased,orproud),graduallymovingtouncomfortablefeelings(e.g.feelingsurprised,disappointed,confused,frustrated,sad,orangry).Iwrotescenariosandfine‐tunedthemweek‐by‐week,basedonhowthechildrenwereinteractingandwhattheywereorwerenotexpressing.Someinstructionwasneededtoteachvocabularyandprocess(e.g.whatisbreath,howtobreathe,goinginward,awareness,howtouseartmaterials,howyouknowyouwillgetaturn,lininguptoleave.Iplannedtousethepuppetsandgraduallyuseactivitiesorgameswithoutthepuppetprops.Ifoundthiswasnotpossibleuntilthelasttwoweeksofthesemester.Ithoughtthechildrenwouldlearnfastergivenbehaviorstomodelfromthe“wise”puppetandseeingthechangeinbehaviorsandcommentaryfromtheotherpuppets.Thiswasdifficultforthem.Theirownfeelingsoftenoverwhelmedthem(includingfeelingsofhelping,surprise,excitement,confusionresultingingrabbingorhittingthepuppets,hidingtheirfaces,avoidingrespondingorrunningaroundtheroom).Ichangedtheflowoftheactivitysequencestoavariationofthatbelow:

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One,doingahands‐onactivityassoonastheyenteredtofacilitatebeingpresentinthecounselor’soffice,eitherstandingorsitting(easingthetransitiontoachangeinclassroomclimate);

Two,watchingandhearingthepuppetwithaproblem; Three,observingashortresponsebythewisepuppet;

Four,sensingwithinforinnersensations,feelings,oremotionswithin,occasionallywithapromptandasmallpuppetfriendontheirlapandusingartmaterialstoacknowledgethese;Five,assistingthetargetedpuppet(s)followingthemodelofthe“wise”puppet;andSix,sensingwithinthemselveswhateverarosewiththeresolutionofthescenariousingartmaterialstoacknowledgewhatarose.

Ifoundthatthestudentsweremoreattentiveandengagediftheyhadshortscenesfollowedbyhands‐onaction.Thisoftenworkedbestiftheactionswereprovidedanddefinedbythe“wise”puppetandstudentswereinvitedtoassistmetomovethepuppetsorotherpropsinthescenario.Iincorporatedthebodymaphandout(R.Veugelers,2012)anddiscussedbyP.LevineandM.Kline(2008)asameansforstudentstoacknowledgeanddescribetheirsensations,feelings,and/oremotions.Alargevarietyofartmaterialswereavailable,alongwithstickers,sticks,rocks,feathers,clay,andothertactilematerials.Ioftenchangedthescenarioandskitstoassiststudentsacknowledgeinnersensationsastheirinteractionswiththesematerialsandverbalcommentsindicatedsupporttheymightneedtocontinueandresolvethesituationforthemselvesorofthepuppets.Itreallydidseemthatthesepuppetswere“real”forthestudents.IoftenrepeatedascenarioorexpandeditthenextweekifIfeltstudentsneededmoretimewithcertainfeeling.Ioftenchangedtheafternoon

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sessiontoincorporatewhatIlearnedimplementingthemorningsession.Iunderestimatedtheamountoftimeitwouldtakeforthechildrentomovefromcomfortabletouncomfortablefeelings.Ihadnotanticipatedhoweasilytheybecameoverwhelmed.Theyoftenwantedto“ownandhold“allthepuppetsoralltheartmaterials,closedupandbecomenonrespondent,tippedovertheirchairs,interrupted,complainedorlefttheactivityandtookmaterialsfromthecounselor’sdeskordrawers.IeventuallyusedthesebehaviorsforFocusinginthepresentmoment(achimeandaprompt“Iamsensingperhapsyouarefeelingsomething.”)andfordesigningscenarios.Thesechangesresultedfrom,inlargepart,myFocusingsessionswithmypartnersormyself.SomeofmyFocusingsessionsaredescribedasreflectionsinthefollowingpages.Somearedescribed,alongwiththescenariosin(Baumgart,D,2015).EvaluatingExpectationsFocusingwasnewtotheteachersandadministratorsinthisschool.Focusingwithchildrenone‐to‐onewasnotnewtomebutFocusingwithagroupofchildrenwasnewandIfounditintimidatingwiththesestudents.Iusedtheteachers’listofbehaviorsforstudentstocompileachecklistsoIcouldmonitorchanges.Thechecklistincludedrespectingpersonalspace,listening,inseatwork,followingdirections,stayingontask,interactingappropriatelywithpeers,sharing,turntaking,waiting,followinghallroutines,workingindependently,respectingproperty,tryingnewortaxingtasks,andmanagingorregulatingemotions.Idesignedadatasheetusingtheseskillsandusedaneducationaltimesamplingobservationtechniquetomonitorbehaviorsovertime.Iwantedfrequencydataofeachstudentonthesebehaviorsduringprojectimplementation.Ialsocheckedtheoverlapwithskillsinthe2cdStepSocialSkillsCurriculum,FocusingskillsIwas

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teaching,andthebehaviorchecklistandsharedthesewiththecounselorandteachers.Thereweremanyoverlaps.Ianticipatedanincreaseinbehaviorsonthechecklistandanincreaseinacknowledginganddescribingandthusmanagingcomfortableanduncomfortablesensations,feelingsandemotions.IhopedthisdataandthetoolswouldassistmetoillustratetheefficacyofFocusing.IwascertainlycurioustodetermineifFocusingmadeadifferenceinthesessionsandintheclassroom.TensionsIwassurprisedtofeelsuchtremendoustensionasaguestteacher.Ifoundusinga“new”strategyandnotviewingbehaviorfromatotallybehavioralperspectivemagnifiedthetensionIfeltinthisenvironment.Abehavioralmodeloftenjudgesbehaviorsasgoodorbad.Badorinappropriatebehaviorsaretobeextinguishedorreducedintheirintensity,durationorfrequency.Thisusuallyimpliesarewardorpunishmentsystem.Iwantedthebehaviorstowanbutforadifferentreason.Iwantthebehaviorstodiminishnotbecauseofrestrictions,rewardsorpunishmentbutbecauseofnewFocusingskills,offerednewoptions.Ialsowasfindingstudentbehaviorslikethegrabbingandhitting,disruptiveintheFocusingsessions.IfeltthesestudentschallengethesystemandIfeltchallengedaswell.SomedaysIdoubtedIshouldcontinue.Beingunsuccessfulwasalwaysanoption.Acknowledgingthatthestudents’successwastheonlyimportantgoalwaswhatcontinuedtosupportmeimplementingtheprojectforallconcerned.Iwishedtheroomdidnothavealargewindowononewholewallopentotheofficeandalltherein,butitdid.SomedaysIfeltlikeIwasonawidescreenTV.

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BeforeIprovidemyFocusingreflectionsbelowIwanttoacknowledgetheschoolcounselorasanexceedinglycompetent,wiseprofessional,welllikedbythestudentsandwithagreatsenseofhumor.Thestudentshavetremendousrespectandgenuineaffectionforthisprofessional.Ialsowanttoacknowledgetheprofessionalskillsoftheclassroomteachersandtheirgenuineregardforstudents.Imetallthesestudentsknowingonlytheirfirstnamesandhavingthelistofbehaviorsfromtheteachers.BythethirdsessionIsawbehaviorsinthehallwaysthatclearlyindicatedthestudents’behaviorscouldbeextreme,outofcontroland/orharmful.Iknowthecounselor’spresenceinthesesessionssetatoneforthestudentsthatfacilitatedthesessionsandtheFocusing.Shewassowisenottoleavethesessionsalltomeatfirst!ReflectionsafterthefirstfourweeksIhadaweekbreakafterfourweeksofteachingonesessionpergroupperweek.Althoughthebreakwasprescheduled,itwasacriticalbreakformetoreflectandreviewdata.Ischeduledself‐reflectionandFocusingsessionswithmyregularFocusingpartnersanddiscussionoftheprojectwithmyFocusingcertificationclassmates.ThesesessionsresultedinareaswhereIcouldaltermyapproachandenergy.Isharesomeofwhataroseinthesesessionsbelow.Thefirstreflectivesessionwasduringacertificationclasswherewesharedourprojectsandsoughtinput.Isharedthatmyprojectwasongoingandbothexcitingandfrustrating.IwasfrustratedwiththeprocessofthesessionsandthetensionIfeltregardingdifferingphilosophyandteachingmethods.Idescribedbehaviorsthathadarisen,includingchairstippingover,studentsflingingtheirtorsoonthetable,grabbingart

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materials,wandering,notresponding,andtakingmaterialsfromthecounselor’sdeskanddeskdrawers.Idescribedthecounselorandaideinterveningwithinsessionsverballyandwithphysicalrestraints.Idescribedmyinabilitytoactquickenoughtoreflectthebehavioras“youarehittingandshakingthepuppetandyouneedtogentlyputhimonthetable”.Idescribedanactivitywithtwostudents(otherswatching)whereIhadtousemostofmyarmandcorestrengthtorestrainastudentfromhittinganotherstudentwithahula‐hoopwhileacknowledginghowstronghewasandsuccessfullynavigatingthehula‐hooparoundthepersonalspaceofanotherstudent.IwonderedhowoftenIwantedtoworkthisphysicallyhardinordertoavoidahugediscipline“eruption”.Ifeltconcernabouthandlingthistypeofbehavioronaregularbasis.IalsodescribeddreamingnightlyaboutthestudentsandofyearningtoFocuswiththeminthesessions.YetFocusingwasnothappening.MytensionoverwantingFocusingandmaintainingorderwereincreasing.ItoldthemIwenttomycarafterpackingupthepreviousweekandthought,“Justquit.IamnotuptothistensionandnotfeelingauthenticinwhatIamdoing.”Ididnotplantodescribemyprojectinthisway,butitwasarelieftoexpressfeelingsad,frustrated,tense,irritated,embarrassedandexhausted.Ifeltheardandsupported.ClassmembersmentionedworkbyStapert,MandVerliefde,E(2008),Bowers,L(2008),Rappaport,L(2009),Veugelers,R.(2012,2014).Ireviewedtheseworks.IfeltrenewedbyclassdiscussionsandtheFocusingworkbutnot“aided”in“whattodo”.Thesystemstheseclassmembersandauthorsdiscussaredifferentthanthispublicschool.HoweverIdidfeelencouragedbythepublishedworksandthelisteningofferedbymyclassmates.IfeltIwouldandcouldcontinue.

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ThenextdayIFocusedwitharegularpartner.WhatcameduringthissessionwasthatIamtooconsumedwiththeprojectandIyearntoFocuswiththestudentsasIdidinindividualsessions.ThewordYEARNINGwasimportantandasIstayedwiththisfeelingitevolvedintowantingadeeperconnectionwiththestudents.Inadditionmyfeelingtenseintheschoolandwantingotherenjoyableactivitiesformyselfaroseloudandclear.Itfeltrefreshingtofindthesefeelingsboththeretogether.ThenIfeltaflashandheardsomethingsaymy“preplanningwasextensivebutnotreallythatuseful.Stoppreplanningsoperfectlyandspendtimewithyourfriends.”Isatwiththatandsawmyselfbentoveracomputerandthensawimagesofrunninghorses.StayingwiththefeeloftheimagesInotedsomethingwasoverlyconcentratingontheplanningandjustgettingthrougheachsessionbyfollowingaplannedsequence.OverplanningwasinterferingwithmyteachingandflowofFocusing.Theimagesofthehorsesbroughtafeelingofteachingandflowing.Asofteningwithinmychesthappened(somethingshifted)andabigopeningofspacecame,followedbyasighofreliefandthencalmarrivinginmybody.Ileftthewritingofnextweek’sscenariosasabriefoutline.Thethirddayofthebreak,IFocusedalone.IinvitedthetensionIfeelintheschoolasmyissueandFocusedforabout20minutes.Whatcamewasthattheotherkidsarenot“companions”atthistimeandneitheristhecounselorortheaide.ItisNOTSAFEnowtoFocuswithindividualsinthesessions.Ifoundanunderstanding.If“presence”inthegrouporevenattention,respectandquietisnotthere,itwillbehardforevenonestudenttobecomeawareandattendtotheirsensationsandfeelings.ThatfeltlikesomethingIhadnotfullytakenintoaccount,atleastnotinthisway.Atthistimethesearenotstudentswhowillwaitorlistenforverylong.This

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knowledgeassistedmetomovebeyondfeelingcapturedinbothmytensionandmyYEARNINGtodoFocusing.IinvitedmyawarenesstosensehowIfeelinthegroupwhenbehaviorsdisruptthefloworotherstudents.Isawmyteachingmovingawayfromindividualworkwithstudentstotakinggrouppauses(asneededwhenbehaviorsweredisruptive)duringactivities.Isawmyselflettinggooftheplannedactivityasstructuredandabigopenspaceappeared.Iamnotclearhowthiswilllookinmyteaching,butIsensethattheHOWwillcome.AtleastIfeelveryrelaxedaboutthislettinggoofmyplannedactivities.ThefourthdayofthebreakIFocusedfor30minuteswithasecondregularpartner.TheissuewastheconstantdreamsanddaydreamsthatcontinuedayandnightthatIamfindingexhaustingandwantingthemtostop.Iacknowledgedthesensationsinmythroatandchestfeelingtightandirritated.Isensethemoviesasatauntingpresenceofwhatisnothappeningandsay“hello”tothat.ThenIsensedthemoviesrunninginthebackgroundandsomethingwantingmetopauseandwatchamovie.Isensedsomecuriosityaboutthemoviesandacalmsenseinmytorso.ThemoviewasvagueandIstayedwithitasvague.Ittooksometimetobecomeclear.AHHH,Isensedtheyearningsensation,alongingtypeofyearning.AsIacknowledgedthislonging,Iseethemovie,IwatchitandsenseitisNOTaboutwhatIwishcouldhappenbutratherademonstrationofwhatIcouldDOwithashortPAUSEineachsession.IseethekidscomingintotheroomandIinstituteapauseastheyenter.Isensedthisbodymessage,thismovie,isademonstrationofawaytoUSEashortPauseandabreathortwoasatransitionorbeforebehavioralreactionsarise.IsensethisishowIcoulduseaPause.ItseemsinthesemoviesIwasshowing

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myselfwhattodo!!SpaciousnessfillsmychestandIfeltmyshouldersrelaxingandmytensionwiththeprojectdissipating.LaterinthedayasIwroteonthissession,InotedIamstillawareofthemoviesbutmyattitudeisdifferent.InolongerseethemasatauntofwhatIyearnforbutratherasademonstrationofHOWtoFocuswiththisyounggroupofstudents.Mysenseoffeelingirritatedisgone.JustthenIbecameawareofamovieandIbegantakingaPause.InthemovieIwasusingaJinglewiththepause.IreviewedHelenG.Brenner’sbook(2004)andfoundherdescriptionofaPause.Iwroteajingle(Baumgart,D2015)andnameditaPAUSEABCforthestudents.ThenextmorningIrecallIhavesomehandinstrumentsandfindaninstrumentcalledtheWow‐EarthBell(1994)inacupboard.Itringswithadelightfulchimingsoundandcanbeeasilyusedbythestudents.Thefourthdayofthebreak,intheevening,IFocusedalone.IsensehowIhadplannedoutactivitiesfromweekonetoweekfifteen.Iinitiallywroteout15activitiesandcrosscheckedthemwiththeschoolssocialskillscurriculumtoensuretherewasoverlap.Bothmyactivitiesandthesocialskillscurriculumhadsessionsonpersonalspace,helping,sharingandemotionssuchashappy,sad,angry,jealousandproud.IsensedIhadplannedthesequenceasproceedingtoanewemotion/feelingeachweekwithoutknowledgeorexperienceofthesestudents.Iponderedhowbehaviorsfrommylistandtheschoolcurriculum,likesharing,arelikelynotfullyavailableuntileachchildcansenseandacknowledgetheirfeelingsofnotwantingtoshareornothavingenough.Typically,abehavioroftheirssuchasNOTRUSHINGTOGOFIRST,ISMERELY“CONTROLLEDORNOTCONTROLLEDuntilsomethingfeelingaWANTINGwithinissensedandacknowledged.Withinthisperspective,studentslikelywouldnotstopgrabbingadultsorrunningintothemforahug(YESitdoeshurt)untiltheycan

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acknowledgetheysensesomething,likeWANTINGahug.Thesamecouldbesaidfortheotherbehaviors,suchaspushing,rushingtobefirst,interrupting,orgrabbing.ThesestudentswerenotREADYtoproceedtomanybehaviorssuchaspoliteaskingorsharinguntiltheyhadawarenessandskillstosensepersonalspaceandfeelings.Ineededtoslowdownuntiltheycouldbeawarenessofandacknowledgetheirfeelingsandfeelsafetodothis.IalsounderstoodmoredeeplyhowIcouldbeSelf‐in‐Presencetosupporttheseskillsevolving.Howdifferentthiswasfromusingpunishment,rewardsandlogicalexplanations.IfeltempoweredtoexploreFocusingmore.Ifeltthatotherstudentsinkindergartenmightacquiretheseskillsinoneortwosessionsormightcometoschool“ready”toadvanceinthesocialskillcurriculumastaught.Thesestudentsweregoingtoneed5‐6sessionsandvariousactivitiesonthesamethemebeforetheywouldsenseandacknowledgetheirfeelingsinsideandlearnandpracticetheskillstolistentothemwithFocusing,or,asdiscussedinemotionalintelligencecharts,“regulate”them.Theywerecurrentlynotawareoftheirfeelings,werebecomingmergedwiththemortryingtoexilethem.Irevisedmyoutlinedsequenceandschedule.Iadded5‐6activitiesusingthepuppetswherethechildrenwereinvolvedinfirsthelpingthepuppetstakeaPAUSEandsenseafeelingcomingfromhelpingapuppetthatexpressedatargetemotion.AftermanyvariationsandmonitoringtheirfeelingsIcoulddesignactivitiesforthem(withoutpuppets)wheretheycouldhelpeachotherinanactivityorcompleteanactivityinpairs.ThissessionreallyclarifiedformethechildrenneededmetoSLOWdownandteachmuchsmallerstepsincontactingtheirsensations/feelingsintheFocusingprocess.TheyneededmanyopportunitieswiththesamefeelingsandmanydemonstrationsusingthepuppetsandlotsofpracticeinSAFEsituations.

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LaterinthedayIgraphedthedataonteacherselectedbehaviorsofeachstudent.ThiswasnotdataonFocusingorEmotionalIntelligenceskillsbuttypicaltimesamplingbehavioraldatacollectiononthebehaviorsontheteacherslist.IfFocusinghadanimpact,Iwouldseeprogressreflectedinbehaviorsdecreasingorincreasingasappropriate.Thegraphwoulddemonstratethepaceofeachstudent’sprogress.AfterfoursessionsIsawwaslittlechangeinrequestedbehaviorsinallbutonestudent.ThelastweekdayofbreakIFocusedaloneforthirtyminutes.Avignetteplayedofanactualsituationwiththisgroupwhereakindergartenstudentinterruptedoverandover“Iwantaturn.WillIgetaturn?Whenismyturn?WillIgetaturn?CanIgetmyturn”asshetuggedatmyarm,pulledmyshirt,andgrabbedmaterials.Ihadexplained,“gettingaturn”alreadyandrespondedtohersaying”NAME,IhearwhatyouaresayingandrightnowIamtalkingtoeveryoneabouttoday’sactivity.”IsensedinthisFocusingsessionhowunsavoryIfeltaboutthatresponseandhowitmerelyshutherdown.IsensedhowturningjusttoherwithFocusingorexplainingturnsagainwasnotlikelytoworkforherorthegroup.AsIsatwithsomethingfeelingunsavory,thevignettechanged.InthisvignetteIplacedmarkerswithinreachofeachstudentandputasheetwithabodydrawnonitateachplace.AsNAMEsaysshewantsaturnrepeatedly,Iturntoherandmakeeyecontactandsmile,asameansofacknowledgingher,andsay”HmmmLet’salltakeaPause…ABC.Ihearyouwantaturn…”IringthechimeandsaythePause…ABCjingleasallthestudentsbreatheslowly,sensingwhatisthereinsideandsayinghellotothatbymarkingontheirbodymap.Iringthechimetosignalcomingbacktotheactivityandwhatisnextintheactivity.Thepuppetsdemonstratetheactivity,Ipassoutmaterialsandthestudentsparticipate.

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Isaw,bywatchingthevignettehowmuchthesestudentslovedrawingontheirbodymappapers,SOMUCHinfactthattheycanhandleashortPAUSE,RESETandtheRESUME.IrealizeIcanuseanoutlineandResetandResumemyselfasthestudentsreactintheactivities.LaterinthedayImakeplanstospendtherestofthebreakoutoftown,hiking.ThefollowingMonday,duringacertificationclassattunement,Iacknowledgedsilentlyandinwriting,allmyqualmsaboutthisprojectanditspitfalls.IlistedallthemanybehaviorsthatoccurinthesessionthatIfounddisruptive.Ilookatthelistandseethesebehaviorsmoreasopportunitiesthandisruptive.IcanandwillincludeaPAUSEandsensingwhatIcanteachwiththematerialsrightthenratherthanteachingthecompletionofaplannedactivity.Ineedtobecreative,inthemoment,andreworktoarriveatsomecompletionforthestudents.Iamnowexcitedaboutthisprospect.Whew!IdonotyetknowhowthiswillplayoutbutIfeelitwillbebetterthanwhatIwasdoingandwillsatisfythisYEARNINGIhavetohaveadeeperrelationshipandcompassionateconnectionwiththesestudents.

ProgressSummaryThestudentsGradually,overthetwelvesessionsthestudentsbecameengagedintheactivities,respondedtoinvitationstotakeaPauseABC,learnedtoattendinwardmakecontactwithasensationoremotion(Focusingskillset)andincreasedtheirsocialskills.Walkingdownthehalltoandfromsessionsoccurredwithlesspushing,shovingandrunningandattemptingtobetheleaderor“first”rarelyoccurredinthe

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hallwaysorsessions.Halletiquettemayhaveresultedanywaysincethisroutineisrepeatedmanytimesdaily.Isummarizedthetimesamplingbehavioraldatacollectedoverthesessions.Thebehaviors(socialbehaviorsandlearningbehaviors)requestedbyteachersincreasedinallstudents.Thegreatestchangewasanincreaseonskillsonthechecklistfrom30%to95%,theleastwasfrom85%to95%andtheaverageincreasewasfrom65%to90%increase.Onestudent’schangewassodramaticatweekthreethattheteachermadeavideoofsessionsandusedaneditedversionforabehavioralself‐modelingprogramforthisstudent.Withthemoreinwardandwithdrawnstudentsthedataatweek7showedtheyweremoreengaged,askingquestions,complaining,interruptingandrequestingturns.Theirdatafromthechecklistwentfrom90%to85%inthelastweeks.Althoughthislookslikeareductioninrequestedperformancethesestudentswentfromcompliantandwithdrawntoengagedandexpressingopinionsanddesires,andsometimesdoingthisbyinterrupting.Duringearlysessions,Iobservedstudentswerestartledtohavetheirbehaviorsheardasafeeling(expressionontheirfaces)andstudentscalmlyproceededinactivities,expressingfeelingswithartmaterialsthoughtfullyandsometimeswithverbalcomments.Byweeksix,activitiesweremorecomplexanddifficultandtheyrequestedhelp,somewithcuestodoso.Somewereinitiatingsuggestionsforresolvingissuesinscenarios,sharingmaterialsspontaneouslywitheachother,and,aftertwosessionsonthe“magicwords”beganusing“please”,“thankyou”,andraisingahandwithoutacueorprompttodosoandwithoutgrabbing!Theycametothisintheirowntime.ThreeineachgroupweretakingaPauseABCwithonlyacuebyweekfiveandoneineachgroupinitiatedontheirownastheychooseinthesessionsandintheirclassrooms.Commentsandtheirsensations/feelingincluded

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“ThePausemakesmyfingersgoslow”asthestudentchangedfromgrabbingapileofmarkerstomovingahandoverapileandselectingjustone.Averyquietandwithdrawnstudentoffered“Oh,IseeitinmenowandIamputtinginonmypaper”anddrewa“?”onhisheadandsaid“Iamconfused.”Themorninggroupbegancallingthemselvesfriends,asinfriendswitheachother.Onestudent,alwayswithanaide,requestedahandpuppetpolitelyandproceededtomovethepuppettosharematerialswithpeers,participatingwithotherstudentswithouteverhitting(alargechange).AllstudentseventuallyshowedacaringattitudetowardthepuppetsandsuggestedproblemsolvingstrategiesthePuppetshad“probably”usedduringtheweekbetweensessionstoresolveissues.Thesesuggestedstrategieswereappropriateandoftencreativeandenlightening.AnimportantoutcomeincludedstudentslearningtheFocusingskillsandusingtheminothersettings.MostreportedordemonstratedacalmingandsettlingofemotionswiththePauseABCinthesessions.Mostusedthebodymapandartmaterialstodescribetheirsensations.TwostudentswerereportedbyteachersasusingthePauseABCtocalmthemselvesinclassrooms.Onestudentreportedfindinghismaterialsathomeandusingthemwhenhefelt“lonely”and“leftout.”Twostudents,bothseeminglycompliantandwithdrawn,didnotchangeuntilthelastthreeweekswhentheactivitiesbecamemorecomplex,messyanduncomfortablefeelingswereinvited.Thesessionswereintense.Thesestudentsshowedtheirfeeling,tearscamebuteachstudentwasabletoacknowledgethefeeling,usetheartmaterialstoacknowledgeinnersensations/feelings,aPauseABCandthenrejointheactivity.Theirartworkchangedfromshowingthesame“happyface”tofaceswitharangeofemotionsand“something”ontheirbodymapintheirtorso,sometimessolidandblack

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andburning.Exploringchallengingbehaviorsandparticipationincomplexactivitiesexposedthemto”tryingsomethingnew”andriskingmakinga“mistake”.Thistryingandbeingokwithmakingamistakeand“regulating”theirresistanceweretargetbehaviorsfromteachersforthesestudents.Inaddition,theotherstudentsjoinedinsupportwiththepauseABCalongwiththesetwostudentsonnumerousoccasions,withoutacuetodoso,andremainedcalmandattentiveasthestudentsacknowledgedtheiremotionsandtearsandcalmed.Theresponsesoftheteachersandcounselorconfirmthestudentoutcomeswereobservedandvalued.MyProgressIbecamemoreateasewithbehavioralchallengesarisingandwithmeetingtheminastateofPresence.Ibecameadeptatnoticingwhenoneortwostudentswereaboutto“loseit”andchanginganactivitytoengagethemorsuggestagroupPauseABC.Ievolvedintoamorespontaneous,creativeteacher,incorporatingdisruptionswithintheactivitylearningfocus.IfeelmyacceptanceofinsightsgainedfrommyFocusingsessionswerepossiblythemostimportantoutcomesforme.Irealizedhowinterestingandhelpfulmyinnersensationswereandbegantomeetthemwitheasebothduringthesessionswiththestudents,inmydreamsanddaydreams,andinmydailylife.InitiallyIwascautiousaboutsharingmyreflections.Ifelttheymightappearweirdoratleastodd.Reflectingonthis,Irecalledclassroomsituationsanddiscussions,decadesinthepast,withmyteachingcolleaguesinpublicschools.Weoftenrecalledstudentsandteachingsituationshauntingourdreamsanddaydreamsandexpressedhowexhaustedwefeltfromthem!Afewtimesstoodout.Inone,adecadeagoandbeforeIknewFocusing,Irecalledreconstructingteachingstrategiesbyslowingdownthemovies,dreamsordaydreams

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andwatchingwithinterestversusirritation.Oneresultwasaninsightinbetterplacementofmaterialsforastudentwhousedonlyperipheralvision.IalsorecallmyirritationwiththemovieswassointensethenthatIcouldnolongerignorethemandthatitwastheintenseirritationthatdrewmyattentionandanewattitudetowardthem.IrealizedIhadforgottenthesepastevents.Myhesitationinsharinginsightfulreflectionsfromthisprojectdissipatedwiththeserecollections.Isenseadeeperself‐confidenceinmyFocusingprocessandwithmyself.Focusingisanaturalprocess.Iwasjustnotyetcomfortablewithallmysensationsinallsituations.IwasinvitedbacktotheschoolforthefollowingyearandIaccepted.Ifeltthiswasapositivestatementofprogressinthestudents,intheFocusingsessions,andinmycapacities.Ithankalltheteachersandstudentsforthepastandfutureopportunitiesandlookforwardtothenextyear.References Baumgart, D. 2015. “Focusing scenarios and skits for focusing in groups with kindergarten students in an elementary school” Unpublished manuscript available from the author. Baumgart, D., Johnson, J., & Helmstetter, E. (1990). Augmentative and alternative communication systems for persons with moderate and severe disabilities. Brookes Publishing Company. Bowers, L. (2008). Gene Gendlin’s gift for children. FOLIO, 278. Levine, P. A., & Kline, M. (2008). Trauma-proofing your kids: A parents' guide for instilling confidence, joy and resilience. North Atlantic Books.

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Rappaport, L. (2009). Focusing-oriented art therapy. Accessing the body’s wisdom and creative intelligence. Jessica Kingsley, Publisher. Salovey, P., & Mayer, J. D. (1990). Emotional intelligence. Imagination, cognition and personality, 9(3), 185-211. Skills for social and academic success n.d. “Committee for children: second step”, Committee for Children non profit. Seattle, Wa. www.cfchildren.org. Stapert, M., & Verliefde, E. (2008). Focusing with children: The art of communicating with children at school and at home. Pccs Books. Veugelers, R. “Being seriously playful with Rene Veugelers, htpp://2012. UTUBE .com.watch?v=SjFXedd-dd8. Veugelers, R.,”Body Map” handout from Children focusing: Exploring our felt senses. Focusing Summer Institute, 2014, Garrison, NY. Weiser Cornell, A. (1996). The power of focusing. Oakland, California: New Harbinger. WOW-Earth Bell. World Beat, 1994,160 Belmont Ave., Garfield, NJ 07026. Publishedonhttp://www.focusing.org/April26,2016