Document

Friday 2nd November

Silwood Bonfire Night pl8

News p2,3 Science, Art and Ethics plO Edwina Currie p 11

: 3

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Massive restructur ing of the college day is

be ing cons idered by a col lege commit tee ,

the ' W o r k i n g Par ty on the Col lege Day ' ,

chai red by Professor A l a n Swanson.

The Rector , Sir Eric A s h , told Fe l ix that

the idea had emerged from a B o a r d of

Studies discussion in w h i c h students were

represented. He pointed out that the

college was 'short of teaching space -

lecture rooms, seminar rooms, short of

space at lunch , short of t imetabl ing space

wi th the n o v e l combinat ions l ike

chemist ry and management and four

year courses requi r ing language study'.

H e said that the commit tee was to

rec ieve feedback from students, and

stressed that there was to be no increase

in contact hours. He preferred a

' reduct ion on number of lecture hours'

and an increase in the number of

seminars.

He added that 'classical office hours

were a terr ible straitjacket' and 'there

was a lot to be said for start ing at 8.30',

w h i c h w o u l d ease t ravel f rom afar as it

w o u l d avo id the rush hour. He said that

staff w h o w o u l d still hit the rush hour

could come in earlier and w o r k before

the proper day started.

Professor Swanson said that the

commit tee was st i l l in the process of

asking the departments for their v iews,

and that the IC U n i o n President, Paul

Shanley, was on the commit tee to express

the students' point of v i ew. H e said that

the Humani t ies department couldn' t do its

job under the present t imetabl ing

constraints. In addit ion departments w i l l

have to be cont ro l led to stop them g iv ing

more lectures in the extra t ime this

proposal w o u l d produce.

H e added that he had wr i t ten to a l l the

people w h o might be affected - inc lud ing

Rob Northey, Refectories Manager - to

ask their opinions .

The change to the college day w i l l be

discussed at the U n i o n Gene ra l Meet ing at

1.00 on Thursday 8th N o v e m b e r in the

Great Ha l l . Please note that the date in

the advert isement on the back cover is

w r o n g - the U G M is on Thursday , not

Tuesday as pr in ted .

Stick-Up Suzanne Ahmet Resigns T h e Management schools ' plaque was

myster ious ly returned to its or ig ina l

posi t ion last Sunday. It was stuck to the

w a l l upside d o w n wi th B l u - T a c k , w i t h a

carrot attached. A message was left w i th

the sign saying that it had c o m e from 'the

Phan tom Carrot ' . The perpetrator is

thought to reside in Fa lmouth K e o g h H a l l .

It is be l i eved that a member of the

Roya l Col lege of Science U n i o n (RCSU)

stole the sign be l i ev ing it to be a part of

mascotry. T h e R C S U mascot ry team have

been unavai lable for comment .

T h e o r ig ina l sign was due for

repacement and a new plaque has been

on order for some time.

More Thefts A 'considerable amount of theft' has

occured this term, accord ing to M r T e r ry

Br i l ey , securi ty officer at IC. 'Since the

beginning of the te rm there have been 38

recorded thefts .. this is worse than

before', he said on Wednesday .

H e added that this week has seen three

b ike thefts - a total of £ 6 0 0 . A wallet

conta in ing chequebook, d r i v i n g l icence

and £ 2 2 0 was stolen from the U n i o n

G y m . M r Br i l ey advised that lockers must

be used, and added that if anyone is seen

act ing suspiciously - for e x a m p l e loi ter ing

a round cars o r in departments - the

observer should immedia te ly report them

on extens ion 3372.

A football kit and two footballs were

stolen from the Southside bar on

Wednesday even ing . Paul Shanley, U n i o n

President, said that the kit be longed to a

member of Imperial 's 1st team and was

insured for £ 3 6 0 .

Suzanne A h m e t has res igned as Ex te rna l

Affairs Officer (EAO) to enable her to

continue her normal affairs as R C S U

President. A letter of resignation was sent

to M u r r a y W i l l i a m s o n , H o n Sec (Events),

dated the 28th October .

Papers for the re-election of the E A O

Insult Last week the Universi t ies Fund ing

C o u n c i l (UFC) rejected univers i ty bids for

an increase in Gove rnmen t funding.

A lmos t 95% of universi t ies had requested

an increase exceed ing the levels

suggested. T h e move by the U F C may

have been in retal ia t ion for the

universit ies fai l ing to meet 'cost-cutting'

targets p rev ious ly set by the Government .

The decis ion was descr ibed by Sir

E d w a r d Parkes as a 'grotesque insult to

universit ies ' .

The univers i ty bids may have been an

attempt to c ove r the cost of the

Government ' s p lan to double the number

of students enter ing higher education by

the year 2000. Student numbers have

increased by about 13% o v e r the last two

years without an increase in funding.

Sir E d w a r d said that the Government ' s

expans ion plans were unrealist ic at the

present level of funding and that he

be l ieved universi t ies w o u l d not sacrifice

the quali ty of educat ion to augment

student numbers . He s t rongly denied

allegations that universi t ies had secretly

col laborated to sabotage the new funding

system in w h i c h funds w o u l d be al located

to universi t ies that could p rov ide the

cheapest educat ion.

Mrs . Curr ie said ' A n y expans ion has to

be funded three ways; tax payers, the

students and their families, and the

universit ies themselves. '

were put up o n the 29th Oc tober on the

staircase leading to the U n i o n Office.

W h e n quest ioned about the act ion Ms

A h m e t said T d rather do two jobs we l l ,

than three jobs in a mediocre-fashion ' .

Soon after Sir Geoffrey H o w e resigned.

UCLU Loss Univers i ty Col lege Student U n i o n (UCLU)

are to lose their G y m , w o r k s h o p and the

'Garage' . This fol lows last year 's wrangles

over the affair (Felix, issues 868-870, M a y

this year). N ick M c A l p i n e , Publ ic i ty and

Communica t ions officer of U C L U , told

Fe l ix that the affected clubs had been

relocated 'as a short te rm measure ' .

He added that the pharmaceut ica l

c o m p a n y 'E i sa i ' had 'donated ' £ 2 5 0 , 0 0 0 to

the college for the use of their facilities,

but that it was the M e d i c a l Research

C o u n c i l (MRC) that was to use the area

previous ly occup ied by U n i o n buildings.

H e added that 'the picture has i m p r o v e d

since we learned more .... w e have all

ta lked sensibly and the col lege is ve ry

helpful at the moment ' . He sa id that the

un ion 'aims to get a long t e rm solution -

we are m a k i n g sure that the issue is kept

on the boi l ' .

Give Blood If y o u want to help med ica l science but

don't want to die first, Ci ty and Guilds

Col lege U n i o n (C&GU) w i l l be running a

b lood donat ing session in the Southside

g y m on Tuesday the 13th November .

Sign up n o w in the Gui lds office or in

the J C R this Tuesday (6th November) . A l l

of the college are we lcome .

2

Solar Particle Detector 1

Non Sabbatical for Fe l ix to be elected

A mot ion p ropos ing the e lect ion of a non-

sabbatical F e l i x editor w i l l be put to the

U n i o n Genera l Meet ing (UGM) on

Thursday 8th November . He or she w i l l

w o r k alongside a Print Uni t Manager w h o

w i l l arrange the pr in t ing of F e l i x and

outside print jobs. The editor w i l l receive

an honora r ium similar to that rece ived by

the Presidents of C & G U , R C S U and

R S M U , equivalent to two terms' rent in

Southside.

This solut ion to the lack of a sabbatical

Fe l ix editor was produced by an elect ion

TO A L L L E C T U R E R S

THIS MONTH THE BOOKSTORE WILL BE

PLACING STOCK ORDERS FOR BOOKS

REQUIRED FOR CHRISTMAS READING AND

THE NEW YEAR.

PLEASE ENSURE THAT WE CAN GIVE THE

STUDENTS THE BEST POSSIBLE SERVICE BY

INFORMING US IMMEDIATELY OF THE

TEXTS YOU ARE ABOUT TO RECOMMEND.

THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION

ICU BOOKSTORE

commit tee compr i s ing the Execut ive

Commit tee and four others. The Un ion

C o u n c i l has agreed to the mot ion being

put to the U G M but the Col lege must

agree to the change in elect ion

procedure. The runn ing of a non-

sabbatical e lect ion w h e n a sabbatical post

has not been fi l led is a departure from

the no rma l sys tem.

If the mot ion is passed papers w i l l go

up on the 12th, d o w n on the 23rd. V o t i n g

w i l l be on the 3rd and 4th December .

E N G L A N D vrs

ARGENTINA Sat 3rd November

K.O. 2.30pm

TWICKENHAM

Tickets available from

I.C. Union Office

Friday lunchtime

A Cosmic Ray and Solar Par t ic le detector,

part of w h i c h was built at Imperial , was

swi tched on b y remote con t ro l on the

23rd October . It is aboard the space

probe Ulysses, more than 18 m i l l i o n k m

from Ear th . T w o days later Imperial 's

magnetometer was made opera t ional by a

s ignal that took over a minute to reach

the probe.

The magnetometer is a h ighly sensitive

magnet ic field detector, capable of

measuring fields up to a m i l l i o n times

weaker than the Earth's f ield. It w i l l study

the large scale structure of magnet ic field

lines in the hel iosphere.

A l l of the observat ions of the sun's field

have so far been conf ined to the ecl ipt ic

plane. The observat ions made wi th

instruments from Imperial Col lege and the

Jet Propuls ion Labora to ry w i l l p rov ide

data to test the three d imens iona l models

proposed by theorists. This m a y help us

to understand the e leven yea r solar

act ivi ty cycle . Rela ted to the Sun's

magnetic phenomena this is be l ieved to

affect weather patterns on Ear th .

Imperial 's other instrument on board, a

set of two a tomic particle detectors, w i l l

measure fluxes in energetic protons

released from the sun in solar flares. T h e

instrument, part of a complex of detectors

p rov ided by an internat ional consor t ium

of scientific institutes, w i l l investigate the

w a y in w h i c h the heliosphere, and in

part icular the sun, can act as a highly

efficient part icle accelerator.

Chaos 'Chaos in B io log ica l Systems' w i l l be

discussed by Professor R . M . M a y o n

Thursday 7th November . T h e lecture w i l l

be held at 1.15 in Physics Lecture

Theatre 1. E v e r y b o d y w e l c o m e .

Fire Fire broke out in Berna rd Sunley last

M o n d a y w h e n a gri l l caught light. Chr is

Donegan , a past wa rden of Be rna rd

Sunley, said that a student d iscovered the

fire and put out the flames wi th an

ext inguisher . He said that there had been

a large amount of smoke p roduced w h i c h

set of the a larms at a round midnight .

M r Donegan said that the cooker

i n v o l v e d had been examined by the

Col lege e lec t r ic ian and had been passed

as safe. It was n o w back in use.

M r Donegan said that there had been a

good response' to the a l a rm . H e

commented that there had been a fire

a la rm test o n l y that m o r n i n g at 8.00.

3

REVIEWS

The F r e s h m a n Brando! Broder ick! Together at last on

the big screen! Mat thew Brode r i ck is the

Freshman and M a r l o n Brando is Ca rmine

Sabatini w h o bears a start l ing

resemblance to., er-m...

Brode r i ck is new in the B i g A p p l e and

manages to find a w o r m in the first

nineteen minutes w h o makes off w i th all

his clothes, m o n e y and self-respect. (The

latter may not be strictly accurate). His

father is as nutty as someth ing ve ry nutty

indeed and tighter than someth ing we

can't ment ion on prime-t ime Fr iday fare.

His professor runs a fi lm col lege from his

o w n books, w h i c h are compul so ry to the

course (sound familar eh kids ?) and so

Our Hero has no choice but to take the

first job offer he gets.

W h i c h , in the way of such things, is

offered to h im by the ve ry self-same

crook w h o r ipped him off in the first

place. Said v i l l a in introduces B r o d to

Brand ; o l ' ' F ive M i l l i o n Dol la rs For The

First F ive Minutes ' plays an honest Italian

impor ter w h o has a poster of Mussol in i

for sent imental reasons and a vacancy for

a nice lad to run del iver ies at a thousand

dollars a trip.

This poses a mora l d i l e m m a for an

honest young fresher since he doesn't

k n o w the nature of his goods. A t this

point, the f i lm, w h i c h has thus far been

shaping up as a gentle but obvious M o b

comedy takes a turn for the surreal w i t h

the unment ionable package. It also grows

a good deal funnier, if y o u have a secret

hatred of shopping centres and petrol

station attendants.

Because this is a Mat thew Broder ick

film it ends in gratuitous but not

una l loyed happiness. Var ious compl ica ted

mora l issues resolve themselve neatly and

al l is we l l wi th the wor ld .

The Freshman is nicely made, cer tainly

not dull , and both stars give appeal ing

and credible performances. It wins big

B r o w n i e points from us and we saw

Mar ie l l a Frostrup in the audience.

P.S. For those of y o u w h o may not

have unders tood the above rev iew,

T . A . F . G . M . w o u l d l ike to summarise as

follows : It's a good fi lm. It's a light

comedy. Go and see it. A N D we saw

Mar i e l l a Frostrup in the audience

(P.P.S. W h y don't we get crap films any

more ?)

The Amaz ing Fly ing Gerbi l Machine

A n d A Bag Of Fish, Please.

The Enchantment The Enchantment (Japanese wi th Engl i sh

subtitles) is b i l l ed as an 'ul t ra-modern f i lm

noir ' . V e r y catchy, I'm sure. The plot

concerns a psychiatrist (played by a

r emarkab ly western l o o k i ng Japanese

mode l / ac to r—Masao Kusakari) w h o

becomes i n v o l v e d w i t h a mysterious (and,

quite natural ly, beautiful) patient. She

happens to have a serious mul t ip le

personali ty problem, , on top of w h i c h she

holds great a n d dark secrets in her

heart(s) etc, etc.

Unfortunately, though the plot may

twist and turn , the fi lm rattles a little too

much—it is not quite as smooth as the

makers must have hoped. It's not too hot

on the noir bit either. Y o u can't just have

a load of shadows and say: we l l boys,

here's a fi lm noir . It lacks the

psychologica l depth, the tension, the

atmosphere of the genre.

A l l this apart, however , there are some

'nice bits'. The re is a nice piece of i rony

in the opening and closing sequences (the

psychiatrist is seen in the first shot of the

movie to have near ly cured a taxi-dr iver

of his obsession wi th an ex-girlfr iend,

whi le at the end it is the kwack w h o

is . . .wel l , y o u can guess). T h e relat ionship

between the psychiatrist and his gir lfr iend

is also quite interesting.

The Enchantment runs at the ICA until

November 19.

lft.

D r . F a u s t u s English National Opera, London Coliseum, 20th October.

A cross between '42nd Street', 'The

R o c k y H o r r o r Show' and an amateur

Gilbert and Sul l ivan? That was one

verdict on the E N O ' s r e v i v a l of Busoni 's

Doctor Faust.

F r o m the momen t the cur ta in rises to

reveal Faust si t t ing at a mode rn

executive 's desk, wea r ing a mode rn suit

and towered ove r by piles of filing

cabinets a r ranged like a city skyscraper

skyl ine , the audience knows it is in for an

updat ing of the s ixteenth century

mora l i ty tale to the twent ie th century.

In fact the who le design lacks cohesion:

ostensibly set in the early twenties, w i th

the w o m e n at the court of P a r m a

wear ing beaded 'flapper' dresses, the

chorus are dressed l ike thirties mafia and

He len of T r o y appears to have wandered

in from the Cole Porter musica l next

door. Mephistopheles ' t ransformation into

Faust's stage assistant, wea r ing pink

basque, red garter and red stilettos was

obvious ly meant to parody the magician's

assistant's role , but mere ly ended up

camp.

These points w o u l d be mere ly irr i tat ing if

it were not that the set itself, dragged out

of mothballs for this rev iva l of a 1986

product ion , looks on the point of collapse.

H o w e v e r , the staging does show some

nice touches, for example , the tr iangular

floor consists of strips of rubber th rough

w h i c h heads, hands and bodies can

appear and disappear, but w h i c h can also

be wa lked across l ike a sol id floor.

A n o t h e r d isappoint ing area is the

choreography. It was difficult to tell

whether s imi lar movements were meant

to be unsynchronised or were s imply

s loppi ly performed. The E N O are

apparently unable to stage conv inc ing

look ing c r o w d scenes: the chorus seems

to m i l l r andomly , exhib i t ing no emot ion

or sense.

What is good about this product ion? The

orchestra, under the di rect ion of A n t h o n y

Beaumont , p lay br i l l iant ly as always, even

if they sometimes d r o w n out the singers.

A l a n Opie's Faust is excel lent in such a

chal lenging role . H e has m a n y protracted

monologues and is on stage for almost all

three hours of the opera. G r a h a m Clark ,

recreat ing the role of Mephistopheles

from the or ig ina l product ion, is also a fine

performer.

The direct ion shows some fine insight

dur ing parts of the product ion , but varies

be tween frenetic, seemingly pointless

act ivi ty and moments of v isual banali ty.

H o w e v e r it a l lows the opera's theme, that

'human beings are responsible for their

o w n actions a n d may not ascribe even

their cr imes and achievements to either

G o d or the D e v i l ' , to develop through

good use of repeated imagery .

This is cer ta in ly not a good int roduct ion

to opera for the uninit iated. It is perhaps

on ly fit for those w h o w i s h to be

chal lenged. This w o u l d have been far

better as a concert performance than as a

visual mess o n stage.

Doctor Faust continues in repertoire until

Novm be r 15th.

Liz W .

T h e H a n d m a i d ' s T a l e Kate (Natasha Richardson), her husband

her small daughter have just failed to

escape from the Republ ic of Gi lead

(formerly the U S A ) . Her husband lies

dead in the snow, she is sur rounded by

a rmed border guards, and her daughter

has s tumbled off into the bushes

frightened by all the noise.

She ends up wi th many other w o m e n

who , for one reason or another, have

been rounded up by the pol ice and they

are separated into those w h o are fertile

and those w h o are not. The fertile

w o m e n are sent off to be t ra ined as

handmaids—surrogate mothers for couples

w h o cannot have ch i ld ren of their o w n

because the wife is sterile.

It is the near future. W h a t was former ly

the U S A has been taken o v e r by a group

of rel igious r ight -wing fundamentalists.

99% of the popula t ion have been

rendered sterile as a result of nuclear

accidents and chemica ls in the

atmosphere. T h e government supports

rac i sm and capi ta l punishment (by

hanging) for such cr imes as rape, adultery

and homosexual i ty .

T h e or ig in for the handmaids comes

Queendom Come By Ellen Galford The author of this book doesn't have a

chip on her shoulder, she's got five

pounds of K i n g Edwards!

Set in a future w o r l d where the

Conservat ive party has created a Blue

Re ich , the s tory revolves m a i n l y a round

Scot land in general , and Ed inbu rgh in

part icular. T h e government has taken the

Conservat ive ideals to their i l logical

extremes, cu lmina t ing w i t h such

momentous pieces of legislat ion as 'The

Sexual Norma l i ty A c t . '

To save the people from their

predicament Queen A l b a n n a is brought

forward in t ime by her sorceress. A s y o u

can imagine she comes from a t ime

where things are rather different,

par t icular ly in sexual terms.

The P r ime Minister , as ever interested

in her publ ic i ty , tries to use her to gain

support for the dictatorship style

government . Unfortunately A l b a n n a

doesn't p lay by the rules, creat ing havoc

and m a y h e m whe reve r and wheneve r she

can.

It is defiantly not for the conservat ive

minded and I don't expect m a n y people

have read a lesbian love scene? W e l l y o u

won' t here ei ther but no subject is taboo

and she definatly pulls no punches w h e n

it comes to the present government .

A reasonable book but I can't help

th ink ing that if she could control her

paranoia the author could become a ve ry

good wri ter .

Ian Hodge.

from the story in the O l d Testament of

Jacob and Rache l . Rache l gave her

handmaid to Jacob so she could have a

ch i ld for her. This story forms the basis of

the ' ceremony ' : a sexual act tak ing place

at a t ime w h e n the handmaid is at her

most fertile a n d in the presence of the

wife. It is ve ry co ld and impersona l and

unsett l ing for a l l three i n v o l v e d .

A l t h o u g h , because of their fertility,

handmaids have theoret ical ly got a high

posi t ion in society, they are ve ry m u c h

beneath wives and are ac tual ly not

treated we l l—when they do have a baby

they don't even get a chance to see if it's

a boy or gir l before the mother has

wh i sked it off and c la imed it as her o w n .

Kate , a l though ou tward ly s u b s e r v i e n t -

one has to be to surv ive—never gives up

hope of f inding her daughter (who, she

finds out, is be ing brought up by another

couple) and either o v e r t h r o w i n g the

government or escaping from the

country. She has become i n v o l v e d wi th

an underground group w o r k i n g to restore

the country .

E v e n though Kate is go ing through a

ve ry t raumatic t ime the f i lm never

actual ly becomes emotional—it is far too

factual and realistic. Read ing about the

whole si tuation may seem very far

fetched but the f i lm makes it appear far

too plausible.

J L W .

Young Guns II

Not no rmal ly a fan of westerns I was

pleasantly surprised by this one. Un l ike

most sequels w h i c h seem main ly a

vehic le for m a k i n g a lot of money on the

strength of the or ig ina l film's name, this

one did actually appear to have a plot

and a purpose.

The fi lm begins w i th a solici tor 's

representat ive meet ing an o ld cowboy ,

w h o calls himself Brushy B i l l Roberts and

claims to be B i l l y the K i d . He knows he is

dy ing and wants to be pardoned. He says

he was pardoned over seventy years

before and wants this pardon to be made

official. The y o u n g man pooh-poohs this

story because he knows the legend of

h o w B i l l y the K i d was assassinated and

therefore can't be standing before h im

now. So the o ld c o w b o y tells h im how it

happened.. .

T h e story is ac tual ly based a round fact.

One of Bi l ly ' s former friends wrote a

book cal led 'The Real Life of B i l l y the

Kid '—but it was a failure, a n d a m a n

c la iming to be B i l l y the K i d did actually

turn up in 1950.

E m i l i o Es tevez as B i l l y the K i d

successfully combines characterists of the

a rche typal cowboy—spinn ing of pistols

and l igh ten ing qu ick d r a w — w i t h a

realistic por t raya l of the K i d as a person

rather than a legend.

I d i d real ly enjoy this fi lm it is a

humourous f i lm wi th a plot and also good

d r a m a w h i c h w i l l please people l ike

myself. Fo r the western buff there's the

obl igatory gratuitous v io lence , frequent

shootouts and even a little sex.

J L W .

Strategy Consulting

at

McKinsey & Company

McKinsey & Company

invite you to an

open presentation on

career opportunities for

graduates and postgraduates

on Wednesday,

November 7, 1990

at 6:30 pm in the

Pippard Lecture Theatre

McKinsey &Company

Greame chats to the Unstoppable Sex Machine.

C a r t e r I n t e r v i e w MUSIC

'He l lo . Have y o u got a tape recorder? ' He

smi led s incere ly and his manner was v e r y

poli te. Nice m a n this J i m Bob , 1 thought. I

did have a tape recorder so we got on

wi th the in te rv iew.

'Is it alr ight if its just me., he's in a bad

mood , probably just smash your

walkman! . . '

J i m Bob and Frui t Bat, the two

members of Carter The Unstoppable Sex

Machine, we re in B r i x t o n p l ay ing T h e

Fridge. Prac t ica l ly a home gig (they l ived

about two miles away), it comes towards

the end of a gruel l ing U K tour.

'It's just his name., his name is Carter

and I started taking the piss, about the

sex machine , and it just stuck. '

A l t h o u g h J i m Bob general ly sings the

songs, both members d e m a n d equal

attention on stage, and yet they both lose

to the adrenal ine pumped music they

thrash out. This is h igh technology guitar

pop, set against a manic b a c k i n g tape of

drums, keyboards , bass a n d samples.

E a c h of their guitars pierce through this

melange wi th ove rd r iven riffs of such

hype that even the stiffs g roove d o w n .

'Ye a h , we l ay the patterns d o w n on a...

yeah , good guess, as Ales i s . . ' (a d rum

mach ine for those not in the know) ' . .and

then go into the studio, add other sounds

and the rest of it. W e do use samples but

less and less now. '

The wa y their sound goes together

makes it hard to characterise Carter.

' W e l l , w e ' v e been c o m p a r e d to so

many , The Clash., even the Pet Shop

Boys.' I myself can find no adequate

compar i son a l though The Shamen p rov ide

a s imilar sort of stage show. Strobes and

lights all add to the si tuation to create an

audio visual exper ience.

'Ye a h , tonight we w i l l use their

projectors here. Basical ly because they

won ' t let us use our backdrops .

Appa ran t ly they ' re not p roper ly fire

proofed. W e k n o w because the stage

manager set fire to them. He S E T F I R E to

them just to p roove a point , wanker .

W e ' r e going to set fire to h i m later!' This

unique style also gives t hem a universa l

audience, f rom the indie biker ' s jacket to

the dancey Converse boot.

'I don't th ink it actual ly existed, it was

just thought up by somebody . Y o u can't

l iken The Happy Mondays to James or

The Stone Roses or The Inspirals. There

are bands around, l ike The Charlatans,

w h o are inf luenced by one of those four

and then other bands have copied them.

They ' re c o p y i n g the w r o n g ones. '

'The acid thing? Don' t rea l ly have t ime,

sometimes dance to it.'

Carter's n e w single, Any Time, Any

Place, Anywhere, is the first released

since s igning to R o u g h Trade . A l r e a d y it

snip - <!

" * ' 3 i .

is h igh up in the Indie charts at Number

4 and is a l l set to s torm the Gal lop po l l .

T h e single has been g iven g o o d reviews

and J im Bob tells me that the v ideo is

excel lent , though unfortunately is not

rece iv ing m u c h airplay.

'We do want to do we l l in the nat ional

charts. W e want to go on Top Of The

Pops. It's one of our a ims at the moment . '

After ta lk ing to h im, this didn't surprise

me. J i m Bob is actually quite a mi ld ,

conven t iona l chap, despite the impress ion

he gives on stage.

It's obvious Carter don't want to be just

another hip indie band al l their l ives, and

judging by the recept ion from the m i x e d

c r o w d at The Fr idge , I don't th ink that

w i l l be a p rob lem.

The tour has been ve ry hard w o r k for

the two lads and their c r e w (especially

'Fat Bastard ' w h o is hai led w i t h a half full

beer cans at the start of each gig) and

they w i l l be g lad to w i n d it up this week

in Canterbury .

It's then back into the studio to record

the a lbum for Chr is tmas release, at w h i c h

t ime another mini- tour is p lanned, vis i t ing

on ly their favourite venues.

A s the Top Of The Pops theme blur ted

out their entrance, Carter c ame on stage

to a rapturous w e l c o m e a n d qu ick ly went

about the task of b l o w i n g everyone away .

C lu tch ing m y tape recorder (which

hadn.t worked) I watched the steady

s t ream of stage divers jump about a round

Carter and not iced that Frui t Bat never

once stopped smi l ing . H e was l o v i n g it

and I thought about what J i m Bob had

said. I disagree. I can't imagine such nice

people wan t ing to smash m y w a l k m a n !

'Students., no I don't hate them., used

to but I real ised it was pointless. ' Wha t

about those w h o t idd ly-wink d o w n O x f o r d

Street? ' O h yeah , that sort., yeah , they ' re

wankers! '

Graeme

R o s e o f A v a l a n c h e Gone are the black sleeves. Gone is the

sombre dark base. In comes the M o d e r n

Beat and spacey designs IN C O L O U R .

Yes, Rose Of Avalanche have gone the

same way as the Soup Dragons to

achieve commerc i a l prestige...but it

works .

E v e n the first track blights away the

g loom, in Your Light's O n , the benefactial

purchaser is pleased by a l ibera l dosage

of the t radi t ional indie wah-wah and hip

beat, man. A s the cover implies , a

suitable concoct ion of Loop and Primal

Scream, in precise quantities, may total

Rose.

M u c h jolliness ensues. T h e vocals may

be an acqui red taste, but somebody had

to sing. Make It Right is bound to do we l l

when released, and they A R E look ing for

inspirat ion, honest. It's a happy thing.

Suddenly and dauntingly, the m o o d

String A' Beads LP

thickens. The acoustics strike wondrous ly .

E v e n the voice is listenable.

O o h , String'A'Beads is the title track

and deservedly so. Rose take the recipe

and define beat, bends and boppiness.

Shake the ce i l ing . The who le is d r o w n e d

in unashamed convic t ion , no concessions,

no defeat. T h e y seem to cont inue for

ever. The rest mere ly glances by, a

remnant from their earl ier days. H a v i n g

failed the bop-beat scene, they n o w

trespass on New Model Army acoustics

and cliches of typica l loves, lost, held and

lost again, sob, sob. The last track, B e

True To Your Love is memorab le , but

never quite gets there, and ends in a

frustration of noise and wah-wah .

Even so, they seem set to destroy any

mega-basses still intact after the dance

takeover.

SJH

A l i e n S e x F i e n d —Camden Underworld

Alien Sex Fiend, as you might guess from

the name, do not boast a reputat ion as

the most tasteful of bands. The i r difinitive

box-set contains a plastic dog-waste

s imulac rum (commemora t ing their first

release w h i c h flaunted the real vers ion of

same upon its sleeve). This , and the

photos w h i c h adorn the gatefold of their

double l ive L P , d id no th ing to reassure

me, so it was w i t h some trepidat ion that I

found myself dragged to their first U K

dates for a whi l e .

A t first glance the stage did nothing to

quel l m y doubts, swathed as it was in

cotton cobweb and amputee Barbies.

Nick Robertson & Slice

This acoustic offering shows precious little

talent. It ini t ial ly sounds quite pleasant,

Show Me A Sign 12"

inspired perhaps by early Housemartins;

but the singer hasn't got any th ing of

interest to say. The music is hardly

or ig inal , m a k i n g each song sound, at best,

unmemorab le . In an effort to rel ieve the

tedium, Nick deploys g immicks , such as

scatting, but his voice is s imply not up to

it. The title t rack thus ends up as a

complete mess. One song even ends up

wi th the o ld p u b - r o c k tr ick of speeding

the tempo up and up whi le The Flame

sounds l ike a bad copy of a Tracy

Chapman song.

Unless the group can develop an

or ig inal sound of their o w n (assuming

they can find one) they w i l l remain as

creators of sl ightly annoy ing background

music.

Rel

After m u c h be lch ing of d ry ice and not

inconsiderable amounts of audience

anticipat ion the band finally took to the

stage. The guitarist looks 'normal '

enough. The percuss ion/keyboardis t , c lad

in ragged labcoat, is otherwise. Mrs

F iend , also on keyboards, is downright

attractive in purple velvet . N i k Fiend. . .on

stage, at last, is the least pleasant- looking

man I have ever seen; whi te faced,

tarten-trousered and puke-green Riddler

coat.

Thankful ly the stage is too smal l for Nik

to engage in his full antics and the music

more than makes up for it. ASF play a

fusion of H M distort guitar and hard-

edged dance percussion a n d keyboard

w h i c h went d o w n we l l w i t h the audience,

most of w h o m were die-hard aficionados.

W h i l e the songs are formular ised to a

certain degree there's enough var ia t ion to

keep the gig from turning into a straight­

forward industr ial dance race, the tempo

rising and fal l ing through the B P M scale.

Dur ing the hour-and-a-half set most of the

old favourites get a dusting off (Gef Into

It, Manic Depression and (ugh!) Sample

My Sausage) and the newer songs are

aired wi th a fair degree of panache for a

first time out. EST...Trip to the Moon and

Boneshaker Baby both m o v e d the c rowd ,

the first as a long, drawn-out synth riff

and the latter as a straight rock 'n ' rol ler .

If you enjoy dance music w i t h a little

more melody and power and y o u can

cope wi th cut-price A l i c e Cooper visuals

ASF might be wor thy of your attention.

Thei r latest a lbum, Curse, is avai lable

now, and they tour again next year.

(This r ev iew has been wr i t ten according

to the new hip 'n ' t rendy editorial policy).

Stone.

U L U A U - N i g h t e r It could have been the most crucia l event

in the L o n d o n student calender . It could

have been k i c k i n ' . I could have t r ipped

out on twelve hours of jol l i ty , music and

50:50 boy g i r l m i x . U L U a l l nighter could

have been A C E .

But it wasn't . Not even close real ly.

Quite an ant i -c l imax, and all rather

upsetting for those who h a d pa id the h igh

entrance fee of S I5 . Perhaps this cost was

the very reason for the night 's downfal l

since essentially the on ly things l ack ing

were people.

Those of us from Imperial Col lege had

the fortunate oppor tuni ty to start F r iday

night off w i t h a visit to the R o y a l Albe r t

Ha l l for a free peace concert wi th Sri

C h i n m o y . I was feeling pretty me l low so

went a long before setting off for U L U .

W h e n 1 left the place I was just so

re laxed m y essential bod i ly functions

were in danger of collapse. A ve ry

strange man that Sri C h i n m o y .

Q u i c k l y into the tube and out to Russell

Square for the g roovy do. W e a r r ived

a round ten thir ty, in just enough t ime to

ca tch Milltown Brothers do their set.

The i r M a n c u n i a n indie sound was to

prove the s tandard for the night, (by

heck, y o u should have seen the flares on

show! Baggy tops, they were pract ical ly

Nana Mouskaris!) but their performance

was one of the best. E v e r y b o d y was dead

jo l ly at this ea r ly stage.

F o l l o w i n g The Brothers came, among

others, Ocean Colour Scene and Flowered

Up. The former were personal ly rather

disappoint ing, a l though the sound was

good. A few songs stuck out as obvious

c r o w d pleasers but other more m o o d y

numbers just seemed to wash over us

i r re levant ly l ike ocean tides. Quite apt.

The f lowery lads from Kings Cross were

re la t ively good . T h e y were headl in ing and

k n e w it, f launt ing to the seething masses

wi th their b rand of scally pop. B y the

middle of their act, half the c r o w d

couldn' t see the band for the other half

we re a l l o n stage do ing their upmost to

be aresholes. Flowered Up actually have

a Bez (re H a p p y Mondays) of their o w n —

a total loony w h o looks l ike one of B i l l

and Ben's mates.

B y this t ime it was two-ish and people

were t i r ing. W e ' d all had our supper (a

jacket potato that I'm sure R S M w o u l d

have been interested in) a n d were

look ing for some s t imulat ion. The bouncy

castle beckoned but the smel l of sweaty

feet that had finally escaped from the

D M s soon put people off that as we l l .

T h e y showed Grease on v ideo , thus

inci t ing a bit of s inging en masse, w h i c h

Flowered Up was fun, but when Robocop came on the

general concensus was that it was just too

loud for five in the m o r n i n g .

The discos started w e l l . There were

two, one for the indie b lack jeans D M lot

and another for the dancy E-generation.

Breakfast was excellent—croissants, j am

and mult iple cups of coffee and at 4 .30am

seemed r emarkab ly appetising.

T h e securi ty staff, w h o were ini t ial ly

just indignant, had finally succumbed to

weariness and n o w couldn' t give a

monkeys fuck for the party, the people or

the rules that governed them.

Seven o 'c lock a r r ived a n d it was t ime

to go. A few hundred had lasted out but

those w h o were conscious numbered on ly

a few.

O n the w h o l e the night was fun, but

not w o r t h the money . L i v e A i d it wasn't .

L o n d o n meets Manchester? Perhaps.

P r e f a b S p r o u t Competition Hammersmith Odeon 22.10.90

W i t h the a lbum comes the tour, o r ig ina l ly

ti t led 'The Comeback . ' F in i sh ing wi th two

nights at the H a m m e r s m i t h Odeon , both

of w h i c h sold out, they p roduced a show

I w i l l r emember for a long t ime.

Prefab Sprout have never hit the mega

market and this showed in the age and

diversi ty of the audience, no sc reaming

teenagers here.

T h e y p layed tracks from four of their

five albums concent ra t ing equal ly on the

new and o ld mater ia l .

For me the whole show was one

continuous delight, cu lmina t ing in their

second encore wi th the p l ay ing of their

most famous song ' W h e n L o v e Breaks

D o w n ' and f inal ly 'Doo W o p in Ha r l e m . '

A wonderful night from a wonderfu l

group, they are not to be missed if you

l ike music where y o u can hear the words.

Ian Hodge.

W e are g iv ing y o u the chance of w i n n i n g

a copy of Prefab Sprout's latest a lbum,

Jordon: The Comeback. W e have three

copies of the cassette and two of the

compact disk, one of w h i c h could be

yours if y o u answer all of the fo l lowing

questions correc t ly .

W h o featured on ha rmonica on the From

Langley Park to Memphis a lbum?

W h i c h of the fo l lowing is not a Prefab

Sprout song?

a) Doo Wop in Harlam.

b) The Devil has all the best tunes.

c) Green Isaac.

d) On the right hand of God.

W h o are the last four t racks on side one

of Jordon about?

W h i c h two members of the band are

related and what do they play.

A l l entries should be sent to the F E L I X

office to a r r ive no later than Wednesday

31st October . Please specify w h i c h format

y o u require, compact disk or cassette.

In the event of more than five correct

entrants the winners w i l l be pul led from a

hat.

International poet and scientist to visit IC

Science, Art, and Ethics H o w long is now? L o o k i n g back it

seemed l ike ages of silence.

I was s tanding at the bar, a pint of

bitter comfor t ing my sense of doing, as

thought about what I could say. He was

an artist, and the other a poet. T h e y

looked at me . I said noth ing . T h e y

wanted me to speak. 1 had noth ing to

say. H o w cou ld I, a student scientist,

relate to their

ways of seeing

and doing.

Miros lav Holub

concludes the title

essay of his book

a metaphor ica l monumen t to the heroes

of science, in his short s tory Argonauts of

the Air.

Miros lav Ho lub is a scientist, in the true

Wel l s i an sense. He is a prol if ic wri ter of

poetry and essays, whilst researching into

i m m u n o l o g y in Prague.

Is he an unusual mam? Undoubted ly . A s

T e d Hughes, poet Laureatte, has wri t ten

The Demension

of the Present

Moment and

other essays w i th

'In this sense, our

ego lasts three

seconds.

Eve ry th ing else is

either hope or an

embarrass ing

incident. Usual ly

both. '

M y

embarrassing

incident was a

feeling of two

worlds , the artist

and the scientist.

The w o r l d of the

creat ive

imaginat ion and

personal

statement, and

that of the d ry

repeti t ive

c r amming ,

measur ing and

count ing. Ye t

does science

really destroy our

sense of wonde r

and creat ivi ty,

whilst art

nurtures and

expresses it?

This is a

question that H . G .

Wel l s raised as a

student here. In the preface to the

student magaz ine he founded and edited

he writes d o w n his expectations. He

expected scientists to be wri ters and

poets. Part of this v is ion of a creative

scientist was inspired by his lecturer, the

Dean of the Col lege , Professor T . H .

H u x l e y . Wel l s was bit terly disappointed

and uses the destruction of the Col lege as

Brief Reflection on test-tubes Take

a piece of fire, a piece of water, a piece of a rabbit or a piece of a tree, or any piece of a human being, mix it, shake it, stopper it up, keep it warm, in the dark, in the light, refrigerated, let it stand still for a while—yourselves far from still but that's the real joke.

After a while you look—and it's growing, a little ocean, a little volcano, a little tree, a little heart, a little brain, so little you don't hear it lamenting as it wants to get out, but that's the real joke, not hearing it.

Then go

and record it, all dashes or all crosses, some with exclamation-marks, all noughts and all figures, some with exclamation-marks,

and that's the real joke, in effect a test-tube is a device for changing noughts into exclamation-marks.

That's the real joke which makes you forget for a while that really you yourself are

In the test-tube.

'Miros lav H o l u b is one of the half dozen

most important poets w r i t i n g anywhere ' .

But is he an abberation? Is his

combina t ion of science and art a freak

accident against the nature of these

subjects?

This is one a m o n g many questions that

Miros lav explores , questions about the

nature of our behaviour , what is a sane

Poem printed by kind permission of Bloodaxe Books Ltd

person, ethics and science, disease and

society. His personal reflections give a

sense of exci tement and wi t whilst

t ravel l ing d o w n beautifully guided

pathways of d iscovery, full of unexpec ted

v iews and destinations. Y e t his grappl ing

w i t h the relat ionship be tween truth and

meaning places at the heart of his w o r k

this relat ionship between poetry and

science.

This is a

p r o b l e m he w i l l

be discussing on

Tuesday

November 13 at

1.15pm in the

Read Lecture

Theatre. It is a

unique and

exc i t ing

oppor tuni ty to

listen to a man at

the forefront of

the explorat ions

of the creat ive

nature of science.

This event is part

of a nat ionwide

tour organised by

the Nat ional

Poetry Society.

His theme is

one that he

shares wi th the

late Jacob

B r o n o w s k i ,

scientist,

broadcaster and

wri ter , whose

o w n explorat ions

of science took

h im to the

concentra t ion

camp at

A u s c h w i t z where

his family died.

His response

illustrates the

impor tance of the

issues at stake.

Issues about the

subjects y o u are

s tudying, the wa y

they are taught, h o w y o u perceive them

and h o w y o u may approach w o r k in

science.

Miros lav H o l u b may change your v iews

about science! He cer tainly raises

questions at Imper ia l that are sometimes

hard to find due to the silence, that Wel ls

also heard, of the c r a m m i n g of science

t ra in ing.

Michael Newman

WANTED Science articles of general interest for FELIX.

If you are interested in a particular aspect of your course then why not write about it? Fame and fortune beckons and it could favour you!

Interested? Come into FELIX and ask for Ian.

Edwina curries favour with students in an.

Unfold ing Future O n Tuesday, M r s E d w i n a Cur r ie , M P ,

visi ted Imperial College. Secur i ty was

rather higher than as for the s imilar visit

by M r Cec i l Pa rk inson , Transpor t

Minister , a fortnight ago, w i t h two

security men o n the door c h e c k i ng bags.

Mrs Curr ie started by ask ing whether

Labour w o u l d w i n the next elect ion, and

answered herself by say ing 'they haven't

got a chance ' . She cited three reasons

w h y she was optimist ic of the Tories

retaining a majori ty in Par l iament .

Firs t ly , Labour have a tendency to pile

up votes in seats they a l ready hold,

rather than seek ing to gain n e w terri tory,

and in many of the seats, they need to

w i n to cont ro l Par l iament , they are not

even in second place beh ind the Tories ,

thus they need to displace the L ibe ra l

Democrats (who she referred to as the

Al l iance) .

Secondly, as a Genera l E lec t ion

approaches, Labour pol icies w o u l d come

under closer scrutiny. She said that

people w o u l d find 'many of these

unworkable , expens ive or empty

promises ' . 'What Labour wants is to

satisfy every interest group in our society,

without it cost ing anybody any extra

money. '

'If y o u go through po l i cy documents

l ike Looking to the Future, w h i c h sounds

l ike something Spielberg should have

been i n v o l v e d in , and add up what they

want to do, and y o u ask whether it is

feasible, in m a n y cases the answer is

'Cou ld be'. '

H o w e v e r , she said that these policies

could not be ca r r i ed out 'wi thout

substantial increase in taxes' .

Th i rd ly , for this reason, she considered

that the T o r y pol icies were vote-winners;

ve ry few people want to part w i th more

money than they have to.

The rhetor ic over, she inv i ted

questions. D u r i n g these it emerged that

she was s trongly against parents hav ing

to support their offspring through college

or univers i ty . She said that w h i l e she was

at univers i ty , she was on full grant, but

the people who had to get some or all of

their money f rom their parents had a

harder t ime w i t h f inancial worr ies , it

be ing more difficult to get m o n e y from

them than a local authori ty . She was also

strongly against further educat ion

Ittfigii

' : i l ^ H H i

St FELIX

Edwina presenting a student with their top-up loan.

institutions cha rg ing tui t ion fees to U K

students, say ing that 'We, as a nation,

benefit from y o u being students'. She

thought that this should be the

Government ' s contr ibut ion towards

further educat ion. She added, ' L i v i n g

expenses are your business'.

H o w e v e r , w h e n quest ioned about

Student Loans , and the effect that this

w o u l d have o n d iscouraging people f rom

poorer backgrounds going to univers i ty

wi th the prospect of a large debt at the

end, Mrs Cur r i e said that as the current

student loan was on ly £ 4 5 0 a year, no

one wou ld get far into debt.

This begs the quest ion of w h o is to

fund further educat ion. If the Gove rnmen t

pays tuition fees, and parents are not to

be invo lved , w h o pays the l iv ing

expenses? She encouraged people to get

hol iday jobs; regardless of the fact that

nearly eve ryone does a n y w a y , even if

only to placate the bank manager .

W h e n quest ioned about the wi thd rawa l

of housing benefit to students, and the

effect this had o n d iscouraging students in

L o n d o n because of the high costs, she

said that the Gove rnmen t was neutral on

where students go for their educat ion, but

that housing benefit was 'for poor people,

not you ' .

She stated that a full grant is more than

a single pensioner gets, a n d that it w o u l d

be very hard to justify students gett ing

more than pensioners. ' Y o u ' d better stock

up on the the rmal underwear and save

on heating bi l ls . '

The National Cu r r i c u l um was raised,

and in defence of it she said that 'it is an

enormous step forward to have one, and

to insist that e v e r y b o d y learns their o w n

language, can spell , can put syntax

together, can add up'. ' Y o u go out and

just ask people how to conver t a fraction

to a dec imal , they don't k n o w what either

of them are, let alone how to do it.'

She thought that there was something

w r o n g wi th the nat ional ethos whe reby

people w o u l d m u c h rather become

apprentices rather than go to univers i ty ,

and w o u l d emp loy accountants rather

than engineers in industr ial management .

H o w e v e r , w i t h the increas ing unity w i th

Europe, she hoped that the respect for

engineers in the U K w o u l d increase, as

on the Cont inent . She suggested that

students should 'get good qualifications,

be ambit ious and get into management ,

or found y o u r o w n business' and then in

t ime it w o u l d be possible to push salaries

for engineers up.

No cont rovers ia l questions were put to

Mrs Curr ie , and this was not because of

the machinat ions of ConSoc: Mrs Cur r i e

selected questions at r andom (unless She

memor i sed a l l ConSoc ' s faces!). The re

wasn't even a reference to eggs. C o m e on

Socialists and Communis t s , where were

you? Af ra id of being conver ted?

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a range of strategic and operational issues that adds value to

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Trainee Consultants joining the group undertake data research and

analysis within multidisciplinary FCS teams on assignments of

varying lengths. Thorough in-house training is given in business

skills and the opportunity exists to be sponsored to study for an

MBA at a top business school after two years with the Firm.

Limited vacancies exist for outstanding graduates to join FCS in October 1991.

Further information will be available at a presentation on:-

Monday 5 November 1990

at 6.00 p.m.

at Arthur Andersen & Co., Surrey Street, London WC2

or from Gillian Jones, Arthur Andersen and Co., 1 Surrey Street, London WC2.

a AR T HU R ANDERSEN

ICU Ents Friday Night—The Muscle Shoal.

B J P r e s e n t s . . IF FELIX

Hope you all enjoyed the gig on Fr iday

last, Spirit of Ecstacy—those of y o u w h o

came, tell your friends how to have a

good time. O n c e again any comments or

suggestions w i l l be welcomed—see us

last week's but different bands, obviously

(you're not stupid, are you!!). W e have

the effervessent Muscle Shoal plus support

from the Cuckoos. The Muscle Shoal play

their annual show, wel l they have p layed

probably wouldn ' t bel ieve me. So come

along and see for yourself. A s for the

Cuckoos—well the name speaks for itself.

The price is £ 2 . 0 0 in advance, SI w i th

ents cards and £ 2 . 5 0 on the door. Tickets

a round or drop us a line in the Ents

pigeonhole, this applies to tonight 's event

as we l l as all events.

Tonight , once again, is one of our

Lounge events. O n a ve ry similar ve in to

every year since I've been here and they

are great. 1 could tell y o u about their

haunt ing melodies and excel lent

harmonies these four lovable mop tops

from Moptop T o w n can generate but y o u

can be obtained from the U n i o n Office or

from the friendly hands of the Ents kids.

O h , by the wa y , tonight there is also the

great Ents disco in full effect and a bar

extension unti l 12 o 'clock. See y o u there.

B J , Ents Chair.

£ 2 0 c a s h t o b e w o n FREE PRIZE DRAW

The Union Snack Bar is planning an expansion and is interested to know your answers to the following

questions: 1. What times do you want the Snack Bar to open in the evening?

5-7pm / 6-8pm / 7-9pm / other times

2. On which days would you use it if it was open at the above times?

Mon / Tue / Wed / Thurs/ Fri

3. Would you like:

Hot Meals / Sandwich Bar / Snacks

Entries should be handed into the FELIX Office by Thursday November 8 to qualify for entry into the FREE Prize draw

Your name and department

13

S p o r t Football IC VI-5 QMC IV-4

IC 6ths scored five goals to total 17 in

on ly three games w h e n they k n o c k e d

Queen M a r y & Westf ield Col lege 4ths out

of the U L U cup on Saturday. The game

p roved ve ry tough wi th bo th sides

suffering a number of injuries, most of

w h i c h were caused by D a v e Buckle w h o

left players from both sides sprawled

a round the park. Star IC defender Yasser

H a m d i was taken to hospital w i th a badly

cut lip after a col l is ion in the first half.

Goals from Dave Phil l ips and A k i o

Iwase helped to make the score 2-2 at

half t ime but Q M W scored two quick

goals early in the second half. IC keeper

Mar t in A the r ton kept shout ing in order to

make up for the lack of the large c r o w d

that a team of this s tandard deserves. His

shout ing was rewarded w h e n two goals

from K e i t h Corde i ro and one from

A n d r e w Stanni land in the last 20 minutes

left Q M W w o n d e r i n g what had hit them.

ULU Six-A-Side Sunday 21 October , W i m b l e d o n , IC II

began their annua l p i lgr image to Motspur

Park for medals and g lory . IC's qualifying

group compr i sed C H X , R F H , Golds I and

U C II.

U C II p rov ided IC wi th an excellent

aperitif as IC w o n 1-0. M A b d o scor ing

the decisive goal and T Hulber t , the fish­

l ike keeper, do ing what fish-like keepers

do best.

R F H p r o v e d a nasty p r a w n cockta i l : IC

wi th D Cook scor ing twice in a 2-1

v ic tory . Next on the menu was Golds I, a

team full of U L U players a n d tournament

favourites. H o w e v e r IC were very hungry

and devoured Golds I and spat out their

bones wi th contempt, w i t h goals from S

Watson and N L e o n a r d in a 2-0 w i n . IC

' wrapped up their group, against C H X , 2-0

w i t h S Bar ry scor ing twice.

The quarter f inal , against Kings II, was

w o n at a trot, S Ba r ry scor ing the winner

to set up a semi-final c lash w i t h Golds 1

w h o had s o m e h o w sneaked through v i a

the backdoor .

IC dished out a second he lp ing and

k n o c k e d them out of the tournament . D

Cook scored the winner w i t h N L e o n a r d

scor ing arguably the goal of the

tournament . IC had marched ' Imperiously '

into the final but, sadly, RCI ended their

dreams. Fortune was against IC as a

l u c k y goal , inspi red goa lkeeping and

fading light den ied IC the r eward their

play undoubtedly deserved.

It was a complete team effort.

14

Sailing

The Firef ly Class Inland Championsh ips

were held at the Wel sh H a r p last Sunday

(October 21). IC Sai l ing C lub entered two

boats into the event, notable for the ve ry

strong w i n d w h i c h resulted i n the

majority of competi tors gett ing a touch

damp. The first race unfortunately saw

one team go s w i m m i n g after ro l l ing a bit

too far whilst runn ing , and the other

near ly joined them, fi l l ing up their boat in

the process. In the afternoon the teams

general ly sa i led better, apart from a

comple te ly successful attempt by one of

our boats to r am one of the competi tors

by r icoche t ing off a motor launch, and

were eventua l ly r ewarded w i t h 13th and

16th place. A v ideo was made of the

Canoe So far this te rm, the Canoe Club has had

two trips.

The first w e e k e n d trip of the year

i nvo lved seven of last year 's members

going up to Swaledale in Nor th Y o r k s h i r e

to take part i n a chari ty paddle on behalf

of the Samaritans, M.S . , and Guide Dogs

for the B l i n d appeal .

A we l l organised event was rather

spoiled by the fact that it hasn't ra ined up

there for some t ime and there was no

water in the r iver . After the first day's

paddl ing and dragging of boats over

rocks, we dec ided to head for wetter

parts.

After a w i l d goose chase Nor th to the

River Tees w e ended up o n the R ive r

Ure , near R i p o n , compe t ing for a scrap of

r iver wi th a l l canoeists w h o ' d realised

that this was the on ly spot of whi te water

available in the area.

Last w e e k e n d we headed for Symond ' s

Cross Country The rest of London ' s students were but a

hedgehog in the path of the IC

steamroller at the first col leges ' league

match, held at Par l iament H i l l over five

miles. Strong men were m o v e d to tears

as the Imperial warr iors s w a r m e d over

the field to w i n the first d iv i s ion and gain

th i rd place in the second and ladies

divisions. Resplendent in all whi te w i th

Captain M a r v e l himself, Pau l Nor throp,

taking it by the scruff and runn ing away

wi th the ind iv idua l honours by a

considerable marg in . B e h i n d h i m a flank

of home talent had formed, w i th a

s tunning freshman performance from

Dave Johnstone landing h i m in third and

gaining v i c to ry over F r a n k Dudbr idge and

A l e x Gaske l l (5th and 8th) both of w h o m

returning wi th a vengeance from the

abyss of phys ica l injury. F o u r in the top

ten was the best performance by IC in

event w h i c h w e w i l l try to show later in

the term, possibly at the bonfire party on

N o v e m b e r 3.

O n the w e e k e n d of Oc tober 27 and 28,

the IC Sai l ing C lub entered a team into

the Foot T r o p h y , one of the major team

rac ing events in Br i ta in . The new squad

found itself s t ruggling against m u c h more

exper ienced teams, but. managed to ra l ly

itself for a resounding v i c to ry against the

Univers i ty of L o n d o n second team.

A l t h o u g h hard ly a br i l l iant result for us,

the chance to see some of the country 's

best teams in act ion should pay off in our

c o m i n g matches against other

universit ies.

Ya t in South Wales for the first of our

Freshers ' trips. W i t h warn ings of gales

and floods, we set off enthusiastically on

Fr iday evening .

The weekend ' s paddl ing consisted of a

leisurely paddle in the W y e Va l l ey ,

l o o k i ng at the scenery and hav ing the

oppor tuni ty to pract ice a few skills. There

was also the chance to p lay on the rapids

of the Ya t itself. The weather was great,

and a good t ime was had b y al l .

The Col lege club is p redominan t ly

whi te water, a n d we have a number of

exper ienced paddlers w h o are w i l l i ng to

teach beginners, or people who 've done

just a little bit. W e have p o o l sessions for

this, but a better w a y is to come on a

trip.

For further details contact Ke i th W i l s o n

(Physics 2), J o h n Kent (Life Sci 2), or

Mar t in Hi l lcoa t (Chem E n g 3).

l i v ing memory , and to r o u n d off the team

Car l Edwards grunted his w a y to 19th in

his first league race after six years at

Col lege. His infectious enthusiasm

extended into the second team; B i l l

Skailes, Dan M c Q u e e n , Ian Wi l l i ams and

J i m Watson a l l enjoyed massive

improvements on previous placings to

launch the B-team p romot ion challenge,

w i th Duncan O ' D e l l and D a v e Budgett

m a k i n g fine debut contr ibut ions. In the

women ' s section a savage wa r n i ng was

issued to the w o r l d as a full Imperial

team was f inal ly assembeld and attained

thi rd rank. Spearheading the posse was

Edwige Pitel w h o finished thi rd and

promised more ; He len Mac in tosh and K e r i

W a r d e n - O w e n , 10th and 20th, also

showed posi t ive attitude as they prepare

to represent U L in Japan.

Gui ldford next week.

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please see your Careers

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90 Long Acre

London WC2E 9RA

(Tel: 071-334-0088)

ON Monday, 5 November 1990

AT: 7:00 pm

IN: The Cumberland Hotel,

Marble Arch, London W1 Please apply by C V .

before 16 January 1991

London Paris Munich Boston Los Angeles

LETTERS Scribblers' Corner

Spotty Dear Sir,

First the reply , from Saleem Choudhery ,

to m y previous letter. 1 indicated that the

A r a b Nations were perhaps 400 hundred

years less mature cul tura l ly . It also

appears that they are less menta l ly

mature. In rep ly to the reply; what do

y o u think 'per capita ' means? If you ' re

going to invade our allies, and study at

our Universi t ies , perhaps y o u had better

learn our language.

But to this week ' s letter. What is the

RCS p lay ing at? Last year three guys

stood for President, al l three failed their

year. So this year to fill the vacated

space, they held some new elections! This

p roduced two candidates. One has lots of

exper ience, but is not yet registered, has

failed her year , and w i l l be in the RSM

having d ropped out of physics into

Mater ia l Science! The other guy is the

opposite; arrogant, no exper ience

What's O n A N UP-TO-THE-MINUTE EVENTS GUIDE.

FRIDAY Yacht Club Meeting 12.30pm

Huxley 413.

Rag Meeting 12.40pm

Union Lounge.

Friday Prayers 1.00pm

Southside Gym. See Islamic Society.

C.U. Prayer Meeting 5.00pm

413 Maths.

Christian Union Meeting 6.00pm

308 Computing.

Swimming 6.30pm

Sports Centre. New members always welcome

to join in fun fitness training.

Fencing Club Training 6.40pm

Club training.

Water Polo 7.30pm

Sports Centre. Come along and join in one of

the most physically demanding sports ever

inveted.

Southside Disco 8.30pm

Southside.

SATURDAY Boat Club 9.00pm

Putney Boathouse

Rag's Leukaemia Research

Pub Crawl 7.00pm

Meet in IC Union Snack Bar.

Kung Fu Club 4.30pm

Wu Shu Kwan in Southside Gym.

SUNDAY

Hacks whatsoever , got 80% and is just do ing it

for C V points! I'm not sure w h i c h one is

worse. N o w that the one i n the R S M has

got in , two out of three of the RCS exec

are in the R S M ! ! People in the RCS seem

to be either spotty idle failures or spotty

workahol ics .

I on ly saw the maths vo t ing station, but

it consisted of a b lack box , a hack, and a

chair . No one was encouraged to vote;

there was no sign, no 'hello have y o u

voted yet?' nothing. W o u l d y o u go up to

a hack and ask h i m what he was doing?

I'm not sure I'd want to k n o w . The RCS

compla in of apathy amongst their

students, but what about the hacks

themselves? It's no wonde r that none of

their elections are quorate; ie 300 people

(out of 1,500) have to vote for it to be

quorate so that it is a fair representation.

If it's not quorate it has to be ratified by

a U G M (which are never quorate

Sunday Service 10.00am

Anteroom Sherfield Building. See West London

Chaplaincy.

Catholic Chaplaincy 11.00am

53 Cromwell Road.

Wargames 1.00pm

UDH. A l l welcome.

Catholic Chaplaincy 11.00am

53 Cromwell Road.

Bike for Fresh Air 12.00pm

Battersea Park. Join the campaign for clean air

and better conditions for cycling in London.

Assemble at the British Genius Site in Battersea

Park. Food Music and Stalls. Ride to Trafalgar

Square at 2pm.

Kung Fu Club 4.30pm

Wu Shu Kwan in the Union Gym.

Boat Club 9.00pm

Putney Boathouse.

MONDAY RockSoc Meeting 12.30pm

Southside Upper Lounge. Come and hear the

latest (beer optional). A l l abnormalities

welcome.

Environment Soc 12.45pm

Mech Eng 703. British Antarctic Survey with

Dr Shanklin.

Basketball Club 5.30pm

Volleyball Court. Men's Team.

Keep Fit 5.30pm

Southside Gym.

Rock 'n' Roll Lessons 6.00pm

JCR. Intermediate.

Swimming 6.30pm

Sports Centre. New members always welcome

to join in fun fitness training.

Flesh Gordon 7.00pm

themselves) w h i c h only the hacks attend,

so it's no w o n d e r the hack w o n .

A m o n g s t the R C S general populat ion

the w o r d 'hack ' is used as an insult. It

donotes a b u n c h of self-perpetuating

degenerates. A n d it's hard ly surprising

w h e n the hacks count the vote. Before

y o u ment ion it M r Hack; who ' s to say

that members of staff aren't pro-hack? Is

it any wonde r that they have this image

if the elections are not w e l l publicised,

are subsequently not quorate, and then

ratified by an even smaller minori ty!!

Guilds is exce l len t ly run and very

popular . The President is top of her year,

the Vice-President is top 12. Perhaps this

is not a coinc idence . Most people at

Imperial are here to get a degree (except

for, apparent ly, the RCS hacks), and so

long as they think that be ing an RCS

hack means be ing spotty and fucking up

your degree none of them w i l l get

Union Lounge. IC Science Fiction Soc.

Rock n Roll 7.00pm

JCR. Beginners

Water Polo 7.30pm

Sports Centre. Come along and try one of the

most physically demanding sports.

Latin American 8.00pm

JCR. Beginners/Improvers

TUESDAY C.U. Prayer Meeting 8.30pm

Chaplain's Office

Riding Club Meeting..... 12.30pm

Southside Upper Lounge. Come and see how it

feels to have 16 hands between your legs.

Radio Modellers 12.30pm

Southside Lounge.

Cathsoc Mass 12.30pm

Mech Eng 702. Followed by lunch.

Sailing Club 12.30pm

Southside Lounge.

Radio Modellers 5.30pm

Student training workshop, Mech Eng.

Keep Fit 5.30pm

Southside Gym.

Amenesty International 5.30pm

Clubs Committee Room. Weekly meeting.

Social Ballroom 6.00pm

JCR. Beginners.

Judo 6.30pm

Union Gym.

Latin American 7.00pm

JCR. Bronze Medal Class.

OpSoc Rehearsal 7.30pm

Union Building. 'Kiss Me Kate'.

16

i nvo lved . W h i c h means more hack

elections, and more apathy. Catch 22.

C o m e on RCS. Fuck the hacks. E ve ryone

at Imperial is intel l igent but if you can

sort out your degree, y o u c a n be a good

President, as Miss M c C l a y proves .

Perhaps in the next e lect ion in

February the union w i l l publicise its o w n

elections, and encourage people to vote.

If the RCS students see that the elected

execut ive were vo ted in by , perhaps, half

the student body , they might have a little

more faith in their un ion .

If M r Briant had the exper ience then he

wou l d , in m y i r re levent op in ion , have

made an excel lent f igurehead, if on ly to

encourage others (perhaps less b ig

headed). I hope he sticks a round ti l l

February .

Yours, Athena.

PS. M a y b e a nuke could 'miss' Iraq and

hit the R C S U ?

Accurate

Quotes!

Dear Chris,

In reply to Ul tan McCar thy ' s letter of

26.10.90:

W h e n I wro te the art icle concern ing

Cec i l Pa rk inson I took great care in be ing

as accurate as possible; especial ly as far

as quotes were concerned (now that

students are poore r than ever I cannot

afford to be sued for l ibe l by the

WEDNESDAY Keep Fit 12.30pm

Southside Gym.

Cycling Training l.OOpm

Meet at Beit Arch .

Wargames l.OOpm

UDH. Al l welcome.

Micro Club Meeting 1.15pm

Top floor NW corner Union Building. Every

week.

ICSF Video Buy at HMV 1.30pm

Meet in Science Fiction Library.

Rowing Club 2.00pm

Putney Boathouse.

Basketball Club 7.30pm

Volleyball Court. Women's Team

Kung Fu Club 7.30pm

Union Gym. Wu Shu Kwan.

THURSDAY Fencing Training 11.30am

Intermediate & advanced coaching.

YHA Meeting 12.30pm

Southside Upper Lounge.

Postgrad Lunch 12.30pm

Chaplains Office (10 Princes Gardens). See

West London Chaplaincy.

Fencing Training 12.30pm

Beginners Training.

Fencing Training 1.30pm

General.

Gliding Club Meeting l.OOpm

Aero 266. Come and arrange a trial flight. A l l

newcomers welcome.

Keep Fit 5.30pm

Southside Gym

Midweek Service 5.30pm

Chaplains Office (10 Prince's Gardens). See

Conserva t ive Party). After m y article was

publ ished in F E L I X (on Oc tobe r 19) I

spoke to many people (ranging from

Conservat ive to normal), a l l of w h o m said

that the art icle was fair and accurate. I

therefore take strong objection to being

cal led a liar b y M r M c C a r t h y , who in a

subsequent letter to F E L I X states that he

was not even present to hear M r

Park inson speak. Ei ther he is psychic or

M r M c C a r t h y was told by one of his

rel iable and total ly unbiased ConSoc

friends (he neglected to ment ion that he

is the treasurer of ConSoc) that 1

misquoted M r Park inson .

If I d id misquote, I d id so complete ly

unintent ional ly . M r M c C a r t h y may like to

k n o w that in future F E L I X w i l l endeavour

(where possible) to keep tape recordings

in such situations to resolve any

subsequent differences of opin ion

be tween conce rned parties.

Last ly I w o u l d l ike to congratulate M r

M c C a r t h y in m a k i n g fun of the complete

lack of security dur ing M r Parkinson 's

visit; he may have s tumbled upon an anti-

terrorist po l icy that is m u c h more

effective than the government ' s present

one; let's l augh at serious lapses in

security and maybe the I R A won' t b low

us up. I think that M r McCar thy ' s attitude

in this matter shows a comple te lack of

sensitivity towards families w h o have lost

relatives in terrorist activit ies. Just one

example is the compara t ive ly recent

murder of Ian G o w M P . I'm sure that his

family w o u l d not find his letter all that

amusing.

Kaveh Guilanpour.

West London Chaplaincy.

Social Ballroom 6.00pm

JCR. intermediate.

Judo 6.30pm

Union Gym.

Social Ballroom 7.00pm

JCR. Beginners.

FilmSoc: Dead Poets Society 7.30pm

Mech Eng 220.

Latin American 8.00pm

JCR. Gold medal class.

Southside Disco 8.30pm

Southside.

ICCAG Soup Run 9.15pm

Meet Weeks Hall Basement to take food to

London's homeless.

Small Ads ADVERTISE HERE FOR FREE!

ANNOUNCEMENTS

• T H E FBI codeword is Finance for small

businesses. The contact is on Wednesday

November 7 at 12.45pm in Computing 144.

• EDWINA who?

• RIPSOC-can you dig it?

• COME and worship God! There will be a

short service of worship and prayer in Huxley

308 on Tuesday November 6 at 5.30pm.

Organised by the joing Christian societies of IC.

Al l welcome.

• T H E R E WILL be a blood donating session at

College on Tuesday Nov 13 in Southside Gym.

Sign up in the Guilds Office or in the JCR on

Next Time

LETTERS

Dear FELIX,

Murray ' s apologies accepted. But next

t ime someone in author i ty wants our

posters taken d o w n ask us. 1 w o u l d m u c h

rather take d o w n all icsf posters myself,

than have t hem r ipped d o w n and b inned .

W e then have to print more , wast ing

t ime, money and paper (which we waste

to m u c h of already).

A n d as for the other times w h e n the

w a l k w a y s have been c leared for no

apparent reason, I consider t hem as acts

of vanda l i sm. E v e n if the Col lege c leaning

staff are responsible.

Alex McLintock.

PUZZLED? Do you enjoy inventing logic and other puzzles? If you are interested then

please come into the FELIX office with your ideas.

Tuesday Nov 6.

• G U I L D S UGM—Fri Nov 2, 1pm in Mech Eng

220. Featuring elections for our new publicity

officer. Bring your Union card.

• RECORDS, CDs for sale-recent Wedding

Present, Inspirals, Cramps, Stephen Daintree

and other Reading Fest bands. Ring Sarah on

3515.

• IT'S JUST round the corner

I can hardly wait

To give on to my mum

• BEIT HALL—storage rooms being cleared of

items left prior Sept 1990. If not claimed by

Nov 2. Housekeeper.

• MISSING: If anyone has seen the runaway

piano from the ground floor of Sherfield, could

they please let us know where it is. The West

London Chaplaincy, ext 3035.

• W O U L D you like to join 700 students from

all over Europe for a huge New Year's Party in

Luxemburg. Contact Nick Manzi, Mech Eng 3

through the Mech Eng pigeonholes asap.

FOR SALE

• FREE software for Archemedes! Contact Alex

McLintock, DoC 2 for catalogue and info.

• K M D 100W valve head + home-made 4x12

£200, Axxeman guitar processor £150, all

hardly used, telephone 071-228 0187.

• LOW ENERGY light bulbs-save money and

help the world! £11.50 each. Ideal X-mas

present? Ring Clare Smith, Env Tech ext 7204.

• TOP QUALITY running shoes. Unused men's

size 10. Retail £57. Selling price £35. Contact

Steve Ansell, Env Tech, ext 7207.

• DEAR SIR, 1 am exercising my reich of reply

in response to

Tonight at S i l w o o d Park there is a grand

f i rework ex t ravaganza . This even ing

promises to be a good one, not on ly have

Ents laid on a few bangs and flashes,

there w i l l also be a disco, l ive music by

the band 'fetch', a free barbeque (once

y o u have pa id for your ticket!), and most

important ly , a late bar. T h e cost for such

a wonderful even ing is a mere £ 3 , tickets

avai lable from the U n i o n Office. If y o u

need a lift £2 w i l l buy y o u a return coach

ticket. The coaches are l eav ing at 5.30pm

from outside Beit Quad , re turn ing

sometime in the evening, t ickets must be

bought from the U n i o n before 1.00pm

today.

If y o u don't m a k e it to S i l w o o d there are

plenty of other displays in L o n d o n this

weekend:

S A T U R D A Y

Camden Primrose Hi l l . Bonfire l ight ing 7.15pm. F R E E

Ealing Southall Park. Bonfire l ight ing 8.00pm. F R E E

Ealing Cricket Club , Corston R d . Gates O p e n 6.30pm. £2

S U N D A Y

East Ham Central Park. Gates O p e n 5.30pm. £ 1 . 5 0

M O N D A Y - t h e 5th!

Battersea Park. Bonfire l ight ing 7.30pm. F R E E

Hammersmith Ravernscourt Park. Gates O p e n 6.00pm. £ 1 . 0 0

Kensington and Chelsea Maxil la Gardens. Gates O p e n 6.00pm. F R E E

Thames Barr ier (pier 7) at 10.15am - daylight fireworks!! F R E E

Wandsworth Battersea Park. Bonf i re l ight ing 7.30pm. F R E E

Westminster, C h u r c h of St.John and St.Michael. 6.30pm, w i t h Jazz. F R E E

List compi l ed courtesy of Capital Rad io

A T O T A L L Y F L E X I B L

Sooner or later, engineering graduates have to make a decision whether to stay dose to the technology that fascinates them and in which they have excelled so far, or whether to move out into management style functions which are perceived often quite rightly to be the most effective way up to the top.

In Schlumberger you don't have to make such black and white decisions.

| M A N U F A C T U R I N G

Schlumberger operates a policy of promotion from within which means that all senior managers (and we are talking about all the way up to the chairman) have come up from the graduate engineer level. While providing unsurpassed management opportunities for young engineers, our system of career development also means that employees are not pigeon holed or likely to experience one way tickets to support functions. A typical career in Schlumberger will lead in and out of technical, management, and support roles, broadening experience, providing a unique variety and building the strongest corporate management potential of tomorrow.

And while we are looking for the potential m our recruits to benefit from this philosophy, we do not compromise on engineering expertise. Which is why we are market leaders in our four mainstream activities and are continuing to invest in R&D with a commit­ment and confidence way beyond that of our competitors.

The Oilfield Services half of the Schlumberger group is recruiting Field Engineers to work all over the world in often isolated conditions and with irregular hours providing advice, expertise and specialised technical services to our clients. Such assignments require a high degree of initiative and give a huge amount of early responsibility. These field jobs lead after a period to management and staff positions. Moves are regular and development and training never stop

l#MMHM-| u o e o -

Schlumberger

The industrial half of the business comprises nine autonomous business units designing, developing and manufacturing a range of very high quality products using state-ot-the-art facilities. Our engineers work in small project teams that enjoy a great deal of operational independence. Graduates go straight into a productive role in such a team with training tailored to the individual by means of relevant courses. Careers may be developed in R&D, Production. Purchasing. Sales. Client Support to name but a few. In our relatively small business units, your achievements are quickly noticed and rapid career development will include movement between sites, across disciplines and overseas

If you would like further details, consult your careers department or contact us directly by calling Wendy Bailey on 0202 893535. Alternatively write to her at: Schlumberger Technologies, 23 Cobham Road, Ferndown Ind. Estate, Wimborne, Dorset BH21 7PP.

7777777? Schlumberger will be making a presentation on Tuesday 6th November at 6 pm. in the Sheffield Building's Ante Room, Everyone welcome, refreshments will be provided!

Manager's Bit Massive Typo!

I b o w m y head in shame for the

inclusion this week of a humungous

typographica l error. O n the back page in

big letters, the U G M is adver t ised as

happening on Tuesday 8 November . It

should of course read Thursday , before

y o u sharp eyed devils wri te me lots of

letters on the matter. A l so conta ined in

this issue is another typo of some

considerable amusement (well I thought it

was funny). No prizes but a pat on the

back if y o u can spot i t . . .and a slagging if

you find and tell me of a real ly mundane

one.

U L U G U C

W i t h their usual style and panache ICU

travel led to the U L U Genera l C o u n c i l this

week wi th var ious matters, heckles and

wi t ty retorts i n mind .

I was amused to hear of the verba l

tackl ing of the U L U V P (Services),

Desmond Qui l ty . W h e n speak ing about

the U L U A l l - N i g h t e r , he was asked by

Benjamin Turne r about the size of the

loss made on the night. Q u i c k as a flash

FELIX is produced for and on behalf of Imperial College

SW7 2BB (Tel: 071-225 8672). Manager: Chris Stapleton,

he returned the sharp b l o w of 'about two

grand less than yours did! ' Not

o v e r w h e l m e d by this apparent defeat,

Benjamin went on two consolidate his

stand by interrogat ing the V P further.

Regard ing the event he t ightened the

thumb screws and asked w h y the matter

had not been inc luded in his wri t ten

report. He was told that the report had

been pr inted before the matter had been

discussed by the Exec . W h y then, Benj

cont inued, had he not added it as a

ve rba l report. Desmond had no good

acerbic response to that one! and was

instructed that he should b r i n g the matter

up at the next meet ing. Nice one

Benjamin.

Box A d s and Collators

If anyone wishes to place box ads in

F E L I X they are most w e l c o m e to do so.

The arrangement is for the respective

people to organise some help for the

Thursday night col lat ion of F E L I X .

A l t e rna t ive ly the group can pay for the

advert isment or s imply settle for a free

Smal l A d or What 's O n inclus ion.

Union Publications Board, and is printed by the Imperial

Business Manager: Jeremy Burnell, Advertising Manager:

A box ad was put in last weeks issue

for the Chinese Society, for w h i c h a

m i n i m u m of three collators were

requested. O n e lonely chap turned up and

no blame on h im, but the rest of the

society owes me some w o r k (or money!).

If neither is for thcoming next week then

no ads of any k i n d w i l l be inc luded unti l l

their debt is repaid. Y o u have been

warned!

Credits:

Printer/Bandleader: A n d y Thompson .

Typesetter: Rose Atk ins .

News Editor: T o b y Jones.

Reviews Editor: A d a m T.

Music Editor: Sarah.

Features Editor: Ro land F lowerdew.

Science Editor: Ian Hodge .

Photography: R icha rd , K a v e h

Gui lanpour , D a n H o m o l k a and myself!

The Team: A d a m Har r ing ton , James

Grinter , Je remy, Richard , St .John Har ro ld ,

and H u g h Ea land .

The Collators: R ichard , Ian, James,

Toby , and A d a m . A n y b o d y else that turns

up w i l l get a credit next week .

College Union Print Unit, Prince Consort Road, London

Chris Adams. Copyright FELIX 1990. ISSN 1040-0711.

GETS TOTAL RESTyLE" PART 3...VfS, IT GOB ON...

FELIX FALLS TO THE FLOOR, THEN....

HE'DBECOM£...

A Lire s c i e N n s T !

OP UNTIL NOW FELIX HAD BEEN A SQOEAKy CLEAN, S M O G . P O R I N G , Is-r YEAR

PHYSICS LOOK-ALIKE, W H O

DRANK PEP5J, hit AT MCDONALDS , D I P N T GO TO

P A R T E S 'COS HE HAP TO WORK,

LISTENED TO KYL/F , DJU/VY

SMOKE (ANYTHING;, AWP

THOUGHT RO0OCOP W A S FAR

100 VIOLENT.

PILL THAT WAS PBOVT

TO CHANGE. . . .

WHAT HAS HAPPfNfP TO P£LIX ? WILL HE BE OKAY? IS HE (GULP) DEAD ? IF 50, WHAT THE HELL DO I P0

FOR NEXT WEEK? ANP WHY 90 f ALWAYS £7VP OP WITH THESE SILLY QUESTIONS If Y00 KNOW THE ANSWER'S, PLEASE TELL THE AbTHOR. *

NEX.TI5H: FELIX DISCOVERS THE EASY WAY ro GO our WITH A

BEAUTIFUL W O M A N A T 1 C .

!*IAT H i w t j w ' r TELL v o u . . . HUH))

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b e o f f e n d e d , bvj t h e p o i - r r a y n l o f hi V - Physicists in t h i ' s

S t ' l p , a n d 50 w o u l d U B e t o p o i n t o u t t h a t t h i s is for t h £

f o l l o w i ' n q reasons: (oO I + ' s t r w t . J O ) T h e j d e s e r v e i t .

% Answers o n a p o s t c a r d to A S F .

c/o The ftUx Office- 5 e s t Ons iver g e t s

UNION

President —Paul Shanley

CYCLE CODING Monday 5th to

Tuesday 6th November 10am-4pm

Anteroom—Main

Dining Hall

Have a coded serial

number stamped on

YOUR crank shaft.

CYCLES &

CARS For Remembrance Service

F r o m 7am Fr iday 9th to Sunday

evening , cars, b icycles and

motorcycles w i l l be R E M O V E D by the

Pol ice from A L L roads and publ ic

areas a round the R o y a l A l b e r t Ha l l .

This includes Pr ince Consor t Road and

parts of E x h i b i t i on Road and

Queensgate.

The U G M on N o v e m b e r 8 w i l l n o w be

held at the m a i n Kens ington site, at 1pm

in the Great H a l l . The main i tem of

debate revolves a round proposed changes

to the Col lege day.

A W o r k i n g Party, on w h i c h 1 sit, has

been set up to make recommendat ions .

These w i l l p robab ly inc lude one or more

of the fo l lowing .

• Start ing the day earlier

• F in i sh ing the day late

• Lengthen ing the lunch hour

• M o v i n g the l unch hour

• H o l d i n g an even ing session

Some suggestions are m o r e probable than

others—the most l ike ly one is to ex tend

the day to finish at 6 .30pm.

In order to report back to the W o r k i n g

Par ty in t ime for its next meet ing on

N o v e m b e r 9, I need feedback from

everyone at the U G M .

It is possible that these changes may be

implemented next term—it thus affects

everyone . Please turn up a n d voice your

op in ion .

3—Ots

Stand up and be counted

UNION GENERAL MEETING

Tuesday 8 November 1.00pm Great Hall

To be discussed: • Changes to the College day

*Use of Harlington Gravel money ^Merger of ICU and Mary's Union

BE THERE!!