HR challenge: How to manage workplace conflicts - SHRM India

Managing Difficult Conflicts

Richard A. Posthuma, J.D., Ph.D., GPHR, SPHR 2010

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• Parties often become angry in disputes because:

• They are frustrated with not being able to get what they want.

• They see that the other party has different interests than they do.

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Anger in Disputes

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• Lower regard for opponent’s interest.• Less accuracy in judging opponent’s interests.• Use of more contentious tactics.• More likely to reject settlement offers.• Less thought about the consequences of one’s • own negative actions.• Less restraint in the face of threats.• Lower levels of joint gains.• Can lead to conflict spirals.• Higher incidence of impasse.

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Negative Effects of Anger

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Positive Effects of Anger

• Indicates to the other person that the issue is very important.

• Indicates to the other person that you are less likely to make concessions.

• May induce the other party to yield when they are in a weaker position.

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Conflict Spirals

• Conflict spirals:> When parties engage in repeated contentious

communications with each other.

• Problems:> Tend to induce reciprocating contentious

communications from the other party.> Have momentum that is difficult to stop.

• Outcomes:> Impasse.> Settlements tend to be more one-sided, with

the more powerful party winning.

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Norm of Reciprocity

People tend to reciprocate similarly:

• Contentious behavior with contentious behavior (e.g., threats).

• Integrative behaviors with integrative behaviors (e.g., “How can we both get something out of this?”).

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Avoiding and Ending Conflict Spirals

• Don’t reciprocate> Can break the spiral.> May, however, erroneously signal a weakness or willingness to concede.

• GRIT (Graduated and Reciprocated Initiatives in Tension reduction)> Make and request small steps to reduce tensions.> Requires reciprocity.

• Mixed communications> Avoids sending weakness signals.

• Restrict precedents

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Graduated and Reciprocated Initiatives in Tension Reduction (GRIT)

• One party initiates de-escalation by:> Announcing a concession.> Explaining that the concession is part of a

strategy to reduce escalation.> Unilaterally executing the concession.

• Creates an opportunity for and expectation that the opponent will reciprocate with a concession.> Problem: They may just take the concession

and not reciprocate.

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• Sometimes it’s best to mix a contentious statement with a conciliatory statement.

• Examples:

• Contentious: Party 1 states, “If you persist in these demands, we’d prefer to see you in court, where we expect the judge to find in our favor.”

• Mixed: Party 2 responds, “We are prepared to let a judge decide, but we think that we will both be better off if we reach an agreement based on our interests. Tell me again what your software needs are.”

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Mixed Communications

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Labeling the Process

Sometimes, “labeling” the process is helpful.

• It changes the focus to the negotiation process instead of on the parties’ positions.

• Examples of labeling the process that you’ve been following as ineffective:> “We seem to be going back and forth and

getting nowhere.” > “We’re not going to settle things this way.

Let’s focus on how we can go about settling the problem.”

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By restricting the degree to which a settlement may set a precedent, the stakes are lower and the parties may be more willing to reach an agreement.

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Restrict Precedents

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Summary

• Sometimes conflicts are particularly difficult to resolve.

• A common reason is that anger interferes with rational thinking and behaviors.

• Often, conflict spirals develop in which the conflict gets worse.

• There are several methods for managing difficult conflicts, managing emotions, and reducing the tensions that result from conflict spirals.

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Thank You!

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