How To Be A Good Mommy 101

7/27/2019 How To Be A Good Mommy 101

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Are you.


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Tired?


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Lost?


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Fed Up?In trying to be the perfect mother for your childre


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Giving Up?

Have you ever thought of .

Running away

Suicides???


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Cheer UP!Cause we have JUST the thing you need!!


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How to be a Good Mommy A beginners guide to becoming the worlds best mother!

Tried and tested by the Mommy herself.

*Note: no mommies were hurt in the making of this presentat


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Tip no.1

Be the best cake-cutter of all time

Master the craft of cutting cake withsuch precision that you can feedaround 60 people with an one-poundcake!

Note: knives are not always available inwhich case you might have to make do withscales/ pens/ pencils/ hand/ spoon/microphone


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Tip no. 2

Have a portable water storage tank

Water = life

Make sure your children dont die ofthirst and always carry a water bottlewhich can quench the thirst of around105 children and their teachers!

Note: develop a special bond with the water pot andanyone who dares to come near itgive em TheChop


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Tip no. 3

Make sure your pencil box is equivalentto a stationery shop

Children need various tools to advance intheir education. Always keep in handy

markers/multi color pens/ staplers/pencils/erasers/whitener/ extra staplerpins/scale/tape/scissors/brush/watercolor/geometry box/ globe/ screwdriver/hammer/saw etc etc.


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Tip no. 4

Have an unlimited supply of Shahi Tukras inyour house

Rumor has it Mommy is often seen standingat railway stations wearing a black saree witha gamla full ofShahi Tukras beside her. Sheoffers them to random strangers visiting hervillage in Chittagong.

Side note: So philanthropic. Amen :)


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Tip no. 5

Make the Deddy look good

A beautifulfairDaddy will help toincrease your credibility. Remember, to bea good mom, you need to be a good wifefirst.

For this always carry:

1)Skin Whitening Facewash 2)FairnessCream 3)Sun Tan lotion 4)Chandan bar5)Umbrella 6)Tomato


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Tip no.6

Recite the whole of Quran after every namaz

Note: The real mommy actuallypractices this.


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Tip no. 7

Be smart about fulfilling your childs wish

Take every possible measure to ensure your child goes tobatch trip, but make sure he/she doesnt go near the water.

Note: Emotional blackmail coupled with a stern voice works best here


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Mommy ples,

ektu jai pani

te?


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Tip no.8

For health issues (esp. street foods), dont hesitate to be a li

Being strict at times ensures your child remembers who the b


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Pani puri!!

Bhel puri!!

Varapao!!

Dosa!

Yummmmm

Indiyeah XD

Forge

Chor

dekhso!!


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Tip no. 9

Take extra care for your childs academic results

You should be a daredevil and when you child sits for his/her march into the exam hall, push the teacher aside and shout oanswers to your child and also their friends.

Note: in case the teacher attempts to throw you out, claim yopregnant and going through a hormonal phase


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Tip no. 10

Know how to manipulate your childs teachers

Note: Our mommy was the voice of the entire 18th batch and the Mango to postpone the exam. And Mango changed the e

the first time in history.

Wondering what she said? ;)

*sir apni to onek strong*


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Tip no. 11

Feed your children with your own hands no matter how old

Note: our Mommy used to feed Wasifa and Tabbassum all theshe used to pick out the fish-bones for Masudaawwhh ^__^


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Tip no. 12

Remember to get PLENTY of sleep

Being a Mommy is a tiring work and you need plenty of sleepcant find the time, fall asleep, well in any place.

Note: Our Mommy falls asleep everywhere! Bus, train, car, chchildrens shoulders, plane, bed, floor, trees, grass, table, staiThe mommy was once seen to float on air while sleeping!!


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So far we have talked about the general tips that you must fol

want to be acknowledged as a good mother

But now for some practical examples. We are going to show yoour Mommy, keeps a whole lot of us (40 or so :P) people under


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What our Mommy does!Practical examples to help you understand the Mommy role better ^__^


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Keeps Jummon sane


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Is the voice of sanity when a certchinku starts her usual after-examritual


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Is especially concerned about her friends new partners relifact, thats the first thing she enquires about when he tells hgood news!!


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Doesnt EVER go on a date with Deddy without a third-whe


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Never hesitates to jharafy her children for

Not saving for the future

Not coming to Frehserz

Not eating

Eating!

Not taking a shower

Talking

Not talking

Breathing

Not breathing!!!

Hair-cut

No hair cut

Coming to Fresherz


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Has mastered the art of poetry!

Some of our mommies best work:

Priyo Ashiq, hole na tumi roshik

Kori tomar opekha, bhaggish hoyni tomar jokkha

Tao tomai bhalobashi, ei bhebe kori hasha hashi

Oray meye, roiyo na tumi cheye

Aibar nao tumi kichu kheyeMon khushi hobe tomar khabar peye

Ai je nazia, kothao jashna tui shajia

Tui ektu mota shota, er jonno nei kono quota

Ekla pothe tui chute cholish, tor priyo holo bichana balish

Doesnt give a damn about techn


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Doesn t give a damn about technxD

Who cares? It

keeps changingall the timeanyway :P

*First we thought to

make this on Prezi.Then we realizedyou may not be ableto see it since youretechnologicallychallenged.

I ll t


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Is all ears to everyonesproblemsEVERY TIME!!Rumor has it Mommys famous heart-to-heart convos have he

4 teenagers from committing suicide

2 elderly fellow to find their true loves

18 couples to get married

3 girls from getting pregnant

206 people from going insane

I t t ki d f


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Is an expert at making random fac


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Now you know the qualities of a good Mommy!

But the MOST important quality that you need to have, is to be won

friendto your children ^__^

And the Mommy we have has been the most amazing, the mostincredible friend that we could ever dream of


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Happy Birthday Mommy!!


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You have very right-fully earned the title Mother-

IBA!

Thank you for taking such good care of your children!!

A certain chinky probably would have died crying had

you not been there

Jummon probably would have committed 5 murders

and been behind bars by now.

A certain princess would probably never had the

chance to go to her batch trip and have the best time

of her life

Many people would probably have died of thirst

A certain batch would never have been complete

You are

Mommy

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How To Be A Good Mommy 101

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