8/8/2019 Hazel Denk Med 001 http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/hazel-denk-med-001 1/63 HAZELDEN MEDITATIONS [Today’s Gift] SEPTEMBER Today's [10 Sep 2002] thought is: Somewhere along the line of development we discover what we really are, and then we make our real decision for which we are responsible. -Eleanor Roosevelt Many of us have begun to reexamine our lives and our values. Am I proud of how I act? Of what I do? Will this decision be in my best interest? Do I have strong, interacting relationships? A likely result of this examination might be that we fool ourselves less now and that we don't try to fool others. The discovery of what we really are and of what is important to us urges us toward greater honesty. We are freer to make amends to friends and family members for things we've said or done. We hesitate less in asking for help and in telling others when we feel wronged. Best of all, we've rid ourselves of our old victim mentality and have taken responsibility for our lives. I will begin happily to make responsible decisions today. The thought for[11 Sep. 2002] today: I always entertain great hopes. --Robert Frost In our honest journey, we must admit life is often difficult and painful. But these facts do not describe all of life, and they do not determine how we respond. The sun rises warm and bright after a cold and dark night. The open, generous smile of a small child reaches into the soft part of us all. To be strong and hardy on this spiritual path, we must be truthful about the pain and unfairness in life while holding firmly to a belief in all the generous possibilities. Surrendering to despair, we trade the uncertainty of options for the certainty of gloom. Then we might say, "At least I'm never disappointed this way." Life isn't filled only with difficulty and pain. It is also filled with people whose dignity and spirit rise above their circumstances. These are situations when great sacrifice or love and wisdom turn a problem into an opportunity and a strength. If we look at what has happened in our own lives and in those of others, we have ample reason to hope.
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Today's [10 Sep 2002] thought is:Somewhere along the line of development we discover what we really
are, and then we make our real decision for which we are responsible.-Eleanor Roosevelt
Many of us have begun to reexamine our lives and our values. Am I
proud of how I act? Of what I do? Will this decision be in my bestinterest? Do I have strong, interacting relationships?
A likely result of this examination might be that we fool ourselves lessnow and that we don't try to fool others. The discovery of what we
really are and of what is important to us urges us toward greater honesty. We are freer to make amends to friends and family membersfor things we've said or done. We hesitate less in asking for help and in
telling others when we feel wronged. Best of all, we've rid ourselves of
our old victim mentality and have taken responsibility for our lives.
I will begin happily to make responsible decisions today.
The thought for[11 Sep. 2002] today:
I always entertain great hopes.--Robert Frost
In our honest journey, we must admit life is often difficult and painful.But these facts do not describe all of life, and they do not determine how
we respond.
The sun rises warm and bright after a cold and dark night. The open,
generous smile of a small child reaches into the soft part of us all. To
be strong and hardy on this spiritual path, we must be truthful aboutthe pain and unfairness in life while holding firmly to a belief in all
the generous possibilities.
Surrendering to despair, we trade the uncertainty of options for the
certainty of gloom. Then we might say, "At least I'm never disappointed
this way." Life isn't filled only with difficulty and pain. It is also filled
with people whose dignity and spirit rise above their circumstances.These are situations when great sacrifice or love and wisdom turn a
problem into an opportunity and a strength. If we look at what has
happened in our own lives and in those of others, we have amplereason to hope.
in the night sky, relish the sensuous pleasure of a warm, soapy bath, see
a good movie, listen to music, grow plants.
We live spiritually when we make a place for beauty and when we slow
down to enjoy the beauty that already surrounds us. We may wonder
what good that may do us. The answer is that these spiritual gesturesadd meaning to all the other parts of our lives.
Take a few minutes now to appreciate something beautiful. Make a
plan to bring some beauty into this day.
Today's [20 Sep 2002] thought is:
God did not make us to be eaten up by anxiety, but to walk erect, free,unafraid in a world where there is work to do, truth to seek, love to
give and win.
--Joseph Fort Newton
Today stands before us with promise. It invites us to fully participatein experiences. That we are alive, that we stand present facing thisday, guarantees that we are qualified to handle every challenge that
snags our attention. And we need have no fear. The world and all
that's in it is spirit-full. We are safe and secure if we'd but believe it.
When we look toward the day with confidence, we tap the inner
strength that is ever-present. The more frequently we turn to this
strength, the less often we are haunted by pangs of anxiety. Our trustin that strength heightens our faith and our understanding that all is
well—always and forever all is well.
Giving up fear offers a freedom that will exhilarate us. Faith, trust,
confidence will ready us for any challenge, all experiences.
Nothing needs to make me fearful today. I am here. Therefore, God is
here too.
Today's [21 Sep 2002] thought is: New feelings may seem uncomfortable at first. I may be used to feeling
afraid and anxious, or depressed and alone. In my new life, I may beginto feel joy or happiness, or peace and calm. These new feelings aresigns that I'm changing and learning how to accept my new way of
thinking. Feeling peaceful means I'm healing from all the crises in my
past. If I confuse feeling peaceful with feeling bored, I need to remindmyself that the absence of fear or crisis takes awhile to get used to. I
am glad to welcome my new feelings and emotions; they are one way
It's still not exactly a "piece of cake" for me to accept today's
occasional pain and anxiety with any great degree of serenity, but I'mincreasingly able to be thankful for a certain amount of pain. In The
Program, we find the willingness to do this by going over the lessons
learned from past sufferings — lessons that have led to the blessingswe now enjoy. We can remember how the agonies of addiction — and
the pain of rebellion and bruised pride — have often led us to God's
grace, and thus to new freedom. Have I thanked my Higher Power for
the miracle of my life this day?
Today I Pray
When I was helpless, I asked God for help. When I was hopeless, Ireached out for His hope. When I was powerless over my addiction, I
asked to share His power. Now I can honestly thank God that I was
helpless, hopeless and powerless, because I have seen a miracle.
Today I Will Remember
From powerless highs to a Higher Power.
Today's [25 Sep 2002] thought is:
Pride is the mask of one's own faults.
—Hebrew Proverb
Fear has many disguises. Sometimes it puts on sexy clothes and talks in
the voice of lust. Sometimes it wears the mask of anger or greed or
envy. And sometimes fear pretends to be pride. "I'm smart and strong,"we say to ourselves. "I don't need help. Whatever I have to do, I can do
alone." These are the kinds of things we say when we refuse to join a
group or put off asking someone to be our sponsor or even confide in afriend.
But is it pride or fear talking? Pride takes the illogical stand that in spiteof the pain we've lived with for so long we really are better than others.
Fear, on the other hand, whisperingly suggests that others may be better
than we are, so we'd be safer to hold back so they'll never know.Reaching out for any kind of help would make us vulnerable.
But no one grows as well without support. Strength and pride aside, we
need other people's input, insights, and encouragement. We need people we can trust to hold us accountable. We need to hear about their
struggles and successes. When we insist on going it alone, it's usually
not because we're more independent and self-sufficient than other people. It's because we're afraid.
great. We get sobriety. We get serenity. We get friendship. We regain
our family. We get a deep, loving relationship with a Higher Power
who wants peace and joy for us and for the world.
Prayer for the Day
Dear Higher Power, I pray the words of Step Eleven. I pray to knowYour will for me. And I pray that I have the power to carry out Your
will.
Action for the DayI will examine my life. I will look to see how my will gets in the way of
God's will.
Today's [06 Oct 2002] thought is:
My humble beginnings have made me very grateful today.
JIM BURNS
Gratitude doesn't depend only on humble beginnings, even though
that's the case for Jim. Rather, it's a mind-set. It may not be automaticto many of us; however, it can be cultivated. For starters, we can take amoment to remember all the friends and family members who are still
present in our lives. Calling them to express our love, dropping them a
note of appreciation, or walking into the next room to give them a hugwill trigger it. Gratitude always takes willingness on our part and a little
effort.
Those of us who have had seemingly horrendous experiences may findit hard to be grateful. And there are lots of us in this category, but we
must be seeking another perspective or we wouldn't be holding this
book right now. That, in fact, is the miracle of gratitude. It happenswith just a tiny bit of effort, just like the effort we're making right now.
Perhaps we can acknowledge that we're grateful that we still have sight
or the strength to hold this book. That's a beginning, and that's all that'snecessary
I have many things to be grateful for today, even if they don't comeimmediately to mind. Just looking around this room will offer some
examples.
Today's [7 Oct 2002] thought is:Spiritual growth is more of the nature of proceeding
from hunch to hunch than from conclusion to conclusion.
--John Fortunato
Faith and trust in some kind of Higher Power can grow
like a tree from a seed. It doesn’t have to leap into our
lives full grown.
All that faith needs is a small opening, a crack to slip
through. We don’t have to be sure; we don’t have to believe with all our mind and heart. A hunch will do ,
I am willing to give to others what I want in return today. Their efforts
will match my own.
Today's [12 Oct 2002] thought is:
When a man is deprived of the power of expression, he will express
himself in a drive for power.
--Jose Arguelles
If we are to grow in recovery, if we are to break out of our isolation, if we are one day going to learn to give back some of what we have
received, we must find out what our gifts are. That means making art,
whether by painting or welding or parenting.
Many of us used to think art was luxury; art was for a highbrow elite
and had nothing to do with us or how we lived. But we also used to
think that way about prayer or about God, and now we find both at thecenter of our days.
Art is not about making a product to buy or sell. And it is not aboutsuccess or failure. Whatever we make is a mirror. It's feedback. Art is
about connecting with nature and God and joining them in their
continual act of creation. Art has the power to center us, to stop us inour tracks and make us see.
We've found isolation from other people to be a death, an act of
isolation. So, too, is the refusal to express ourselves. Through art wecan find out what our gifts are, and learn to give them with joy.
Today help me take one step toward finding out what my gifts are.
Today's [13 Oct 2002] thought is:
Recovery is civil war, but it is a war that can be won.
—Sister Imelda
How often do we hear people say, "Sure, I know it's the right thing to
do—but it's easier said than done!'' But "it," whatever "it" is for each of us, is actually easier done than not done. As hard as it is to turn our will
and our behavior toward recovery, failing to recover is much harder.Ultimately, any price we pay for recovery is far less than the cost of giving up everything we've gained.
Some of us have a very difficult time making phone calls. Others arescared to death of speaking at meetings, talking to strangers, or
admitting that we have feelings. But the alternative has simply been too
painful. Whatever we have to do is worth it. The payoff is immense.
How many of us, when we did attend that meeting that frightened us,felt an enormous surge of self-confidence and happiness? How often,
when we have stood our ground and found it did not kill us, have we
felt that we could lick the world? The payoff is that we learn to likeourselves more, and that is as good as it gets.
I will make sure today that I am not forgetting the benefits of recovery
and only considering the price of recovery.
Today's [14 Oct 2002] thought is:
Whoever thinks a faultless piece to see, Thinks what ne'er was, nor is,
nor shall be.
—Alexander Pope
Perfectionism is complex and subtle. Out loud, few of us would say,"Perfection is my only acceptable standard," but in the privacy of our
own minds, many of us talk out of the other side of our mouths: "I must
always give 110 percent." "I must never fail a friend." "For winners,there's really only first place and no place."
Setting a high standard and holding yourself to it is certainly admirable
behavior. No one who shoots too low accomplishes very much. Butthere is a big difference between striving for a high standard and
expecting yourself to achieve it every time out. No one can "always" put out a 110 percent effort; there are days when we only have 80 percent to give. No one "never" drops the ball or bungles an
opportunity; even world-class performers have their off days. And first
place is only as sweet as it is because it's not a permanent position—notfor anyone. In life, there is no such thing as a perfect score.
Impossible demands on self make self-esteem impossible, too. If our
approval is only won by superhuman feats, we won't have much tocheer about. How much healthier and happier we will be when we
eliminate words like always and never from our inner code of conduct.
We need to hear more applause.
My opinion of myself must not rest on words like always and never.
Today's [15 Oct 2002] thought is:Action carries us in the direction we choose.
Recovery involves doing — going to meetings working our program,reaching out to others. We don't get a job by sitting at home thinking
about it, and we don't get a degree by looking at college catalogs.
It's true that we need to reflect; we need quiet times when we pray for
guidance. There comes a point, however, when action is called for,
when we use the power we are given to carry out our Higher Power'swill for our lives to the best of our understanding.
By our actions, we forge new patterns of behavior. We put into practice
the wisdom of the Twelve Steps. Your action today can be somethingas simple as walking out of the kitchen when it's not the right place for
you to be, or something as complex as embarking on a training program
our nemesis, and everywhere we turn are lines, slow cash registers,
traffic jams. Our experiences with others aren't chance. Fellow
travelers are carefully selected by the inner self, the spiritual guide whounderstands our needs in this life.
We are both the teachers and the pupils. We need both our friends andthose we may label our enemies for what they can help us learn.
I will carefully look about me today with gladness at the travelers I've
selected to learn from.
Today's [27 Oct 2002] thought is:
To give and to receive are one in truth.-A Course in Miracles
Giving our love away, honoring someone in need by giving our full
attention, will usually bring kindness and concern in return. Andunkindness and neglect on our part are likely to result in the same
from others. We will usually elicit that which we've so thoughtfully or thoughtlessly given.
Not many elements in our life are so fully in our control as how we
choose to treat other people. There are few among us who aren'tmoved by another's expression of pure, unconditional love. We are
humbled by it and feel valued. We can honor the existence of our
fellow travelers by our open, willing love for them too.
We need to feel appreciated. And yet, to express appreciation is such a
simple act, one that has profound effects for all concerned. Acts of
kindness multiply very quickly; we contribute to a world favoring our true humanity when we give out loving thoughts even as we receive
them.
I will extend the hand of love to a friend today and thus help to make a
better world
Today's [28 Oct 2002] thought is:Reflection for the Day
If I believe that it's hopeless to expect any improvement in my life, I'mdoubting the power of God. If I believe I have reason for despair, I'mconfessing personal failure, for I do have the power to change myself;
nothing can prevent it but my own unwillingness. I can learn in The
Program to avail myself of the immense, inexhaustible power of God-if I'm willing to be continually aware of God's nearness. Do I still
imagine that my satisfaction with life depends on what someone else
may do?
Today I Pray
May I give over my life to the will of God, not to the whims and
insensitivities of others. When I counted solely on what other peopledid and thought and felt for my own happiness, I became nothing more
than a cheap mirror reflecting others' lives. May I remain close to God
in all things. I value myself because God values me.
Today I Will Remember Stay close to God
Today's [29 Oct 2002] thought is:
Keeping my mind active through good, intellectual discussions is
important to me. Talking over golf scores doesn't take us very far.Louise Jerome
Small talk is what engages us much of the time. There's nothing
shameful about that. Many of the individuals we're in the company of
are strangers to us. Inconsequential discussions seem safer then. Yet,keeping our minds active through thoughtful discussions about the
world expands our knowledge and awareness. This exercises our minds
in important ways. Just as muscles atrophy when unused, so do minds.
Many people shy away from in-depth discussions. Maybe we
frequently do that, too. Oftentimes it's because we feel inadequate toothers. Maybe we assume they are better educated. Fears of inadequacyare familiar to most of us. Will we ever learn that we are and always
have been all that we've needed to be?
One of the good things about growing old, for some of us at least, is
that we've lived long enough to realize that most worries don't
materialize, most situations aren't as serious as we anticipate, and most
people are more approachable than they first appear to be. Taking risksto share our thoughts gets easier the more we practice it. Let's not shy
away from this today.
I'll dare to share my opinions today.
A good discussion can energize me.
Today's [30 Oct 2002] thought is:
Don't miss out on today's learning experiences.
They won't come again. We will never have another day exactly liketoday, so let's take advantage of the lessons we're offered.
We don't like to make mistakes, and we don't like to be in situations
that are fraught with stress, but mistakes and distress seem to go alongwith being human and alive. Both can be turned into sound learning
experiences.
We don't learn if we try to deny or ignore the situation we don't like or don't handle well; nor do we learn if we try to fix unpleasant
circumstance with over- and undereating. How much better if we can
accept the difficulty, see how we have contributed to it, and arrive at a positive course of action. And how often it helps to talk about the
problem with someone else instead of pridefully insisting on muddling
through alone. Very likely, we will discover that today's richest
learning experiences are those we share with others.
I will accept the lessons today offers and share them with someone else
so that we both can grow.
Today's [31 Oct 2002] thought is:A crisis is an opportunity to rely on our Higher Power.
When we came to this program, we were told right away that a Higher
Power is watching out for us and that we can look to that Power
whenever we want guidance or peacefulness. Let's not resist thisinvitation.
Most of us had daily crises before turning to this program for help. Our
attempts to control other people caused many of these crises. So didour reactions to the natural ebb and flow of human existence. Now we
have to take the plunge and begin to rely on our God, however weunderstand God, to show us the way to handle every experience that's part of our Divine unfolding.
I will look to God today, and every experience will make sense in thewhole of my existence.
NOEVEMBER
Today's [01 Nov 2002] thought is:
The cause is hidden, but the result is known.
- Ovid
We know it's coming before we do it. Our boyfriend dumps us and we
devour the ice cream. We don't get the promotion so we head for the
bar. We have a fight with our spouse and treat ourselves to a new
leather jacket—at his or her expense. We decide that because we're
feeling bad anyway, we might as well take full advantage of it. We
figure the worse we feel, the more entitled we are to the indulgence.
This type of behavior starts a cycle. The worse we feel, the more we
want to self-destruct. Let's face it - our actions are usually premeditated.
We think about the ice cream, the drink, or the leather jacket until we
can get to it. During the planning stage, we can shift gears. We think it
through. We know we have a choice. We decide to do somethinghealthy instead of destructive.
Today I will make only healthy choices for myself.
Today's [2 Nov 2002] thought is:
A.A. Thought for the Day
When I came into A.A., I learned what an alcoholic was and then Iapplied this knowledge to myself to see if I was an alcoholic. When I
was convinced that I was an alcoholic, I admitted it openly. Since then,have I been learning to live accordingly? Have I read the book,Alcoholics Anonymous? Have I applied the knowledge gained to
myself? Have I admitted openly that I am an alcoholic? Am I ready to
admit it at any time when I can be of help?
Meditation for the Day
I will be renewed. I will be remade. In this, I need God's help. His spirit
shall flow through me and, in flowing through me, it shall sweep awayall the bitter past. I will take heart. The way will open for me. Each day
will unfold something good, as long as I am trying to live the way I
believe God wants me to live.
Prayer for the Day
I pray that I may be taught, just as a child would be taught. I pray that Imay never question God's plans, but accept them gladly.
Today's [03 Nov 2002] thought is:
We don't need crutches.
We are unique and wonderful people. We have weaknesses, yes, andwe also have strengths beyond our imagining. We can meet the daywithout the prop of food we don't need or an overly restrictive diet. We
can put away these crutches and just be ourselves.
Perhaps we needed a crutch at one time. We got used to it, and even
though it was in our way and slowed us down, we were afraid to
venture forth without it. Gradually, the crutch began to control our
movements and take over our life. We became its slave.
Then we were invited to consider the possibility of a Higher Power that
would eliminate our need for a crutch. Intrigued, we began to practicerelying on this Higher Power in concrete ways on a daily basis.
We are learning how to walk again. Scary sometimes, without the old
props, but Step by Step we're on our way to recovery.
Just for today, I will put away the crutches I no longer need and rely on
my Higher Power.
Today's [04 Nov 2002] thought is:Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
—Step Six of Alcoholics Anonymous
Readiness is the key to all-important passages in life. Until we're ready
to know something, the mystery is not revealed. Until we're ready to dosomething, the power is not mobilized. Until we're ready to receive a
gift, even if we trip over it, that gift will not be ours. It may not even be
recognized as a gift.
The Sixth Step talks about our readiness to have the obstacles to our
happiness removed. These obstacles are our character defects. Untilwe're ready to let them go - boxed up, on the porch, waiting for pickup,so to speak - they will be left with us. It's that simple.
The Sixth Step is also very specific about who will take them away. For all our intelligence and willpower, we're not the ones who do the
removing. When we're ready to admit the power of God into our lives,
and only then, we will be ready for freedom.
The experience of my fellows has empowered me to have faith in
renewal.
Today's [5 Nov 2002] thought is:
Celebrate your life and hear your spirit sing.
- Elisabeth L.
"What's to celebrate?" some people ask. We all get our fill of the
cynics. Their negativity can weigh down our spirits. But we don't have
to let them control how we see our lives or theirs. To keep our own perceptions positive, it helps to detach from the naysayers. We will
improve our chances if we consciously focus on gratitude for even thetiny blessings rather than on whatever might be wrong.
Becoming grateful is the strongest, safest means of feeling good now
that we are abstinent. Not only does it readily alter our mood, but itchanges our perspective on every detail of our lives. To be thankful
rather than "thankless" is a small price to pay for unqualified happiness
coupled with serenity.
We've all known people who radiate a singing spirit. They love life,
themselves, and others. We seek out their company. We can be like
those people for the travelers sharing our journey. Let's do it!
I will practice gratitude today and be a blessing in everyone's life.
Today's [06 Nov 2002] thought is:There are as many ways to live and grow as there are people. Our own ways are
the only ways that should matter to us.
--Evelyn Mandel
Wanting to control other people, to make them live as we'd have themlive, makes the attainment of serenity impossible. And serenity is the
goal we are seeking in this recovery program, in this life.
We are each powerless over others, which relieves us of a great burden.
Controlling our own behavior is a big enough job. Learning to behaveresponsibly takes practice. Most of us in this recovery program have
behaved irresponsibly for much of our lives. Emotional immaturity is
slow to depart, but every responsible action we take gives us the
courage for another--and then another. Our own fulfillment is the by- product of the accumulation of our own responsible actions. Others'
actions need not concern us.
Today, I will weigh my behavior carefully. Responsible behavior
builds gladness of heart.
Today's [ 07 Nov 2002] thought is:Retirement makes it possible to do what you've never had time to do.
- Fran Coyne
It's an all too common refrain: "If only I had more time." That's onewish that has probably come true for all of us now. But how
appreciative are we of the extra hours? Do we squander them;complaining about the imperfect world we inhabit? Let's consider an
alternative, if that's the case. Let's take a few moments right now to
note the blessings we've experienced over our many decades. Let's
recall, too, the good fortunes that have been bestowed on friends andfamily. Now let's allow ourselves to dream a bit about what we'd like to
experience next in our lives.
We'll change our perspectives on the past as well as the present if we
do this exercise. Generally, that's all we need to do to realize just how prolific our many opportunities for new experiences really are. It has been said that any worthy, reasonable idea for action that comes to us is
not by chance but rather a suggestion from our divine inner voice.
Whether we believe that or not right now, let's "go along." What can ithurt to follow through on a suggestion that isn't going to infringe on
another person? We just may discover that we are finally doing what
we've been waiting to do all these many years.
If I'm not sure what I want to do today, I'll take a moment to fantasize
about the possibilities. One of them will seem right.
We would do anything to save the people we love. In our desperation,
we imagine that if we say just the right words in just the right way, our
loved ones will understand.
If change happens, we think our efforts have succeeded.
If change doesn't happen, we think our efforts have failed. But neither
is true. Even our best efforts don't have the power to change someone
else. Nor do we have that responsibility. People are only persuaded by
what they understand. And they, as we, can understand a deeper truthonly when it is their time to grow toward deeper understanding. Not
before.
Today, I will focus on changing myself and entrust those I love to the
Higher Power who loves them even more than I do.
Today's [13 Nov 2002] thought is:I believe that true identify is found . . . in creative activity springing
from within. It is found, paradoxically, when one loses oneself. Womancan best re-find herself by losing herself in some kind of creativeactivity of her own.
--Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Creative activity might mean bird watching, tennis, quilting, cooking,
painting, writing. Creative activity immerses us fully in the here and
now, and at the same time it frees us. We become one with the activity
and are nourished by it. We grow as the activity grows. We learn whowe are in the very process of not thinking about who we are.
Spirituality and creativity are akin. There is an exhilaration rooted deepwithin us that is a lifeline to God. Creative activity releases the
exhilaration, and the energy goes through us and out to others. We find
ourselves and our higher power through the loss of our self-consciousselves while creating--a picture, a sentence, a special meal.
Creativity is a given. It is another dimension of the spiritual presenceguiding us all. I'll get out of its way today.
Today's [14 Nov 2002] thought is:Learning to trust is one of life's most difficult tasks.- Isaac Watts
We marry for better or for worse, we expect some ups and downs, butonce we feel we've been betrayed, we are lost.
If we've been lied to so many times we can no longer think straight, if
we've been fooled into thinking we are at fault for an impossiblefinancial situation because we don't work, don't earn enough, or
because we spend too much, if we've been manipulated into believing
that by co-signing a loan all our problems would disappear, or if our spouse has credit card bills delivered to a post office box or to another
address, we've been betrayed. The person we thought we were
supposed to trust and to turn to for emotional support is not being
trustworthy or supportive.
Getting through betrayal is a long process, one that both parties must be
willing to commit to in the most profound way. If one party isunwilling to be consistently trustworthy and the other is unwilling to
forgive, the cracked foundation only crumbles further.
Today I will understand that trust is a core component of anysuccessful relationship, and I will know that I deserve a trustworthy
partner.
Today's [15 Nov 2002] thought is:
A.A. Thought for the Day
Have I turned to a Higher Power for help? Do I believe that each man
or woman I see in A.A. is a demonstration of the power of God tochange a human being from a drunkard into a sober, useful citizen? Do
I believe that this Higher Power can keep me from drinking? Am Iliving one day at a time? Do I ask God to give me the power to staysober for each twenty-four hours? Do I attend A.A. meetings regularly?
Meditation for the DayI believe that God's presence brings peace and that peace, like a quiet-
flowing river, will cleanse all irritants away. In these quiet times, God
will teach me how to rest my nerves. I will not be afraid. I will learn
how to relax. When I am relaxed, God's strength will flow into me. I will be at peace.
Prayer for the DayI pray for that peace which passes all understanding. I pray for that
peace which the world can neither give nor take away.
Today's [16 Nov 2002] thought is:Wisdom is knowing what to do next.
- Herbert Hoover
We've all heard stories of people who've been denied credit because of
faulty credit reports. The potential for error is great, especially if we'vegone through divorce.
Just as we want to be informed about how much money our IRA is
making or how much interest a credit card charges, we want to knowwhat the various credit agencies have on our file. Three agencies
currently disperse credit reports. We're wise to contact each one to be
assured that the files are up to date.
Today I will arrange to get copies of my credit reports.
Some of us are afraid to show weakness of any kind. We take our supposed strength as the central fact of our lives. Over time, we may
even come to think of ourselves as indestructible. We imagine that
everything—people, places, and things—can be pounded into place if we come on with enough force. One man at a meeting shared that he
had been confined to a hospital bed after a serious heart attack. Since
he had been forbidden exertion of any kind, he said he made himself
get out of bed, walk across the room, and pick up a scrap of paper from the floor. Just to prove that he could, he said.
Many of us are more like this man than we care to admit. May we,like him, become willing to accept our strength as our weakness, if
that is the case.
Today, let me accept my very real and human limitations.
Today's [22 Nov 2002] thought is:In a culture where approval/disapproval has become the predominantregulator of effort and position, and often the substitute for love, our
personal freedoms are dissipated.
--Viola Spolin
Wanting others to approve our efforts, our appearance, our aspirations
and behavior is perfectly normal, certainly not unhealthy. However,
needing the approval in order to proceed with our lives is.
In early childhood we are taught to obey others and to please them. We
confuse love with approval, and we begin to march to someone else'sdrum. Then we get even more approval. But soon we get out of step
with ourselves; we neglect our personal needs and become puppets.
Giving away our power to the whims of others weakens our Spirit.Personal freedom means choosing our own behavior; it means acting
rather than reacting. It also means allowing ourselves the full adventure
of living, of meeting each moment wholly, of responding in a pure,spontaneous, personally honest manner. Only then can we give to life
what is ours to give.
Each of us has a unique part to play in the drama of life. And we needto rely on our higher power for our cues, not on those whose approval
we think we need. When we turn within for guidance, all the approval
we could hope for will be ours.
I will be free today. I will let no one control my actions. I will let God
give the only approval that counts. Aligning my will with God's willguarantees it.
Today's [23 Nov 2002] thought is:
Reflection for the DayI must never forget who and what I am and where I come from. I have
plan, and if we keep alert and expect miracles, we’ll
see them happen right before our eyes.
Today, let me see the world through my positive
glasses.
Today's [09 Dec 2002] thought is:
“Every child is an artist. The problem is how toremain an artist when you grow up.”
--Picasso
To be an artist is to be tuned in to and turned toward
the new, saying yes to life in all its diversity andrichness. Healthy children face life with openness
and creativity. They make things, play make-
believe, and create a world of beauty and delight.
We are still children if we dare to welcome the
creative force within us and relate it back to thespontaneity and newness of our childhood. Theremay be shadows and even darkness to overcome,
but if we are brave we can rediscover that childlike
energy and freshness.
Picasso went on creating for over ninety years. He
kept the child alive in himself for our delight. Even
if we do not have his talent, we can be inspired byhis example--to bring to life the creative child in us
again.
I am glad to begetting in touch with the creative
child who is still alive within me.
Today's [10 Dec 2002] thought is:“We have our brush and colors--paint Paradise and
in we go.”
--Nikos Kazantzakis
We find in our experiences and in our daily reveries just what we anticipate. If we greet the day wearinga smile, confident that we are needed and able to
make a contribution, we’ll discover that the day
holds great promise. What we need to understand isthat every day holds just as much promise as we’re
capable of expecting. We carry within ourselves the
image of the picture we’re creating.
Since the choice to find happiness rather than
sorrow and regret is our own, why does the latter
even attract us? For no other reason than we fail to believe that we’re deserving of happiness. We know
We each need only what the other can give. Each person we meet today needs our special
contribution.
What a wonderful collection of invitations awaits
me today!
Today's [27 Dec 2002] thought is:Without prayer, I should have been a lunatic long
ago.
--Mahatma Gandhi
How can we make our prayers more satisfying and
fulfilling? One of the best ways is to see and hear
ourselves as we pray, as if we were getting a bird's-eye view of what we look like and how we sound
when we pray.
Seeing from above in this objective way gives a
good overview of the strength and the meaning of
our prayers. Are we whining and fidgeting as we pray? Maybe we aren't really praying but instead
are asking to get our way. Do we sound angry, with
fists clenched? Maybe we need to work on letting
go first before we pray.
This is how our Higher Power sees and hears us.
Our Higher Power knows which prayers are serious,meaningful conversations and which are filled with
self-pity, resentment, and anger. Tonight we can
hear ourselves pray and learn whether we are truly praying or merely taking time for self-centered feelings.
Before I pray tonight, let me run through the things I want to say. Help me keepself-centered feelings at a minimum and true sharing and communication at a
maximum.
Today's [28 Dec 2002] thought is:How magnificently you tossed away this God who
plagues and helps man so much! But you did not
and could not toss out of your heart that part of youfrom which the God notion had come.
--Richard Wright
Each of us accommodates "the God notion" in our own way, but we all have it. Although we may not
Let me carry only the weight of 24 hours at one time, without the extra
bulk of yesterday's regrets or tomorrow's anxieties. Let me breathe the blessings of each new day for itself, by itself, and keep my human
burdens contained in daily perspective. May I learn the balance of soul
that comes through keeping close to God.
Today I Will Remember
Don't borrow from tomorrow.
Today's [14 Jan. 2003] thought is:
If we embody the principles taught in the Twelve Steps, our lives will
get better.
Whether our first Twelve-Step meeting was last week, last year, or five
years ago, we all have one thing in common: We have discovered hope
and our lives are getting better. The good feelings seem almostcontagious. Perhaps they are. We have learned from other people's
examples, and all of us have found life's pitfalls easier to navigate sincewe began relying on the slogans, the Steps, and the principles of the program.
Many of us came into this program quite certain that it wouldn't helpus. Our troubles were far too serious. And some of us resisted the help
that was immediately offered. It couldn't be that easy. Stewing a bit
longer and hanging on to the pain were choices we made.
Now we are seeing newcomers who are like we were. It makes us
joyful to know just how much we all have to look forward to.
How grateful I am that I gave up my resistance. My life will be as
joyful as I make it today.
Today's [15 Jan. 2003] thought is:Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.
- "The Desiderata"
Self-esteem is not static. Within boundaries, depending on the ebb and
flow of the tide of our lives, our sense of well being naturallyfluctuates. Many of our low points, however, have not so much to dowith a particular problem as they do with the state of mind we bring to
that problem.
We may not always have control over certain fears. If we were once
badly burned, for example, we may always have a residual overreaction
to fire - and there are, of course, many kinds of fire. But we do have
control over the fatigue and loneliness that set us up for fear attacks. Of all the efforts we may make to bolster self-esteem, avoiding such
fatigue and loneliness may be the most important.
Is it always necessary to work as hard as we do? Can we never take a