Guilty for a Cat

11/10/11 1:24 PM

Guilt makes you feel well… guilty. It’s like something that’s making you feel bad when you really haven’t done anything wrong. It all started in a fine bright Sunday, with the sun blazing down at the world. I was sleeping with my brothers, Zenon and Egan, with their mouths open preforming a loud snore. A scratching sound was disturbing me by our bedroom door, so I got off the mattress that me and my brothers share and opened the door. My cat Gong-Gong, was sitting right in front of the door with his hazel-green eyes staring up at me. Gradually he walked in with his perfect silver pelt shining I looked at Gong again but this time I had an unusual feeling flaring up in inside me because my cat doesn’t really visit us in the morning. I closed the door quietly so Mum and Dad wouldn’t wake up. I looked at my brothers. My brothers woke up rubbing their eyes. Their hair was all tangled up just like mine. When Zenon and Egan saw Gong padding in , their eyes lit up and I knew that meant something was about to turn upside down. Oh no I thought. My whole body shaking. Zenon immediately grabbed Gong upside down and started spinning him like he was riding a ferris wheel. He was spinning so fast that you could hardly see the outline of Gong. Wait a minute, Gong is very old and he’s sick right now I remembered. “Stop!” I yelled, but Zenon kept laughing and spinning poor Gong in his arms. As for Egan he was still on the mattress laughing too. As I kept watching helplessly, I saw a thin yellow liquid come out of Gong and landed on my blanket. Just at that moment, Mum and Dad came into our room. Uh oh I thought. “Good Morning guys,” said Mum, her eyes laid on Gong who was lying down not moving. Dad also looked at Gong and I could see a flash of worry in his eyes. Is Gong dead I thought. I could feel the beginning of guilt bubbling in my stomach. I knew that I haven’t done anything wrong, but I could of stopped Zenon more. My brothers went downstairs for breakfast as if nothing had happened, but I took one more look at Dad. His eyes were grim and he closed the door, but left a little gap open if Gong wanted to go

downstairs. I looked down at the wooden floor and quickly ran down the stairs. I saw Zenon and Egan eating their breakfast on the table so I sat down on the wooden chair I loved and quietly ate my breakfast. I saw Dad come down the stairs and took his coffee cup and sat down on the seat across from me. Mum sat down next to me and drank her coffee too. I knew Dad and Mum loved Gong very much. “Uhhh… Do you think Gong is going to be okay?” I asked, there was hardly any sound in my voice. “I think he’s going to be alright,” Dad said. I thought I heard a hint of doubt in his voice. “He’ll be alright. You know he’s a strong cat,” Mum said, but she too had a hint of doubt in her voice. I looked at my brothers and tried to read the expression on their faces. They were blank so I decided to just finish my breakfast. Only if Zenon didn’t spin Gong around he would be okay and if I tried to stop him more maybe all this wouldn’t had happened I thought. I felt the terrible guilt again inside me like a rock who wouldn’t budge. I took my small little bites until I saw Gong walking down stairs and come to the living room limping… Oh no … I thought. Gong kept limping and layed down on the cold wooden floor. Mum rushed to him and began patting him. I got off my chair and sat next to Mum. Dad came too. Zenon and Egan sat next to me. I glared at Zenon. I wanted to say look what you have done, the words were at the tip of my tongue, but I knew right now wasn’t the right time. He looked at me and he rolled his eyes. I always thought when people rolled their eyes looked like a bowling ball trying to hit pins, but then misses. “We have to take him to the vet!” said Mum. “We can’t today is a Sunday no vets are open,” Dad said. Mum was still patting him and she stopped. “He’s not breathing…” I looked at Gong. He was completely still with his beautiful hazel-green eyes that I always loved still opened. Mum closed his eyes. I closed my eyes too and thought all the memories abut Gong.

He was an American Shorthair and when you always have dried seaweed he would always come rushing down the stairs and begging for a bite. When we always did that, Gong’s meow sounds more like a purr than a real meow. Then I would give him my whole dried seaweed and Gong would devour it less than one minute. Gong has been around my Mum and Dad before I was born. He has even been around before Mum met Dad. The favorite thing I like to do with him is feeding him. I just love how Dao and Gong are sharing the food and it’s really cute. Dao let’s Gong go first and he waits until he’s done and then he eats. Gong’s personality is very unusual for a cat. He has so much pride being a cat and that’s what I love about him. He still has that pride even when he’s old and grey. The favourite game I like to play with him is that who will he go to. My brothers or me. We all sit side by side on the floor and we call him over. Gong would come but he would just sit in front of us and gives us that look that says, I love you guys all equally and then me and my brothers would all dive on him and give him a big hug. When I opened my eyes again I saw Gong in a green towel. I felt like I was going to cry, but I hated it when people saw me cry so I bit my lip as hard as I could and held back the tears. I felt like I wanted to crawl under my blanket and disappear. “Let’s go to the car,” Dad said. We all went to the car with Gong still wrapped in the soft green towel. My Dad started driving and there was the silence swarming around the car. I knew it was going to be a long ride so I closed my eyes and fell asleep. “We better take him to the grave,” Mum said. She grabbed a towel and wrapped Gong with it. I felt my whole body shaking. This can’t be happening, but I don’t get, if Zenon just spun him around how can Gong die I thought. When I woke up we were already there. The sun was shining down at the orange-brown roof of the building. We got out of the car and walked to the entrance door. There was a women with a black suit on.

“You guys sit on the sofa over there while I talk to this lady,” Mum said pointing to the direction where the sofa was. Me and my brothers obeyed and sat on the smooth cold sofa. We sat there waiting….and waiting. I looked at Mum. She was still talking to the lady with the suit with Dad beside her. I felt like my throat had a knot in it. 30 minutes later Mum walked towards me. I looked up at her eyes were still sad. I couldn’t blame her, I bet my eyes looked the same too. “They’re going to bury him,” Mum said quietly. I looked down at my shoes. Dad walked towards us. “Let’s go home,” We all walked towards the car and drove home. The next day Mum and Dad looked better. They didn’t look as sad as yesterday I thought. At lunch Mum gave us dried seaweed. I was expecting Gong to come down and beg for a bite but he didn’t… I guess you have to accept things in life but I knew Gong wasn’t gone forever he was still in me. In my memories. From that day I learned that if you have something to say, just say it! I also learned that you never realize how much you love something until you lose it or almost lose it.