GRAYBACKBROKENBEAR
(GRAYBACKBEARS,BOOK4)
ByT.S.JOYCE
OtherBooksinthis
Series
Thisbookwasnotwrittenasa
standalone.
Theauthorrecommendstoread
thesestoriesinorderforoptimal
readerenjoyment.
GrayBackBadBear(Book1)
GrayBackAlphaBear(Book2)
GrayBackGhostBear(Book3)
GrayBackBroken
Bear
Copyright©2015byT.S.Joyce
Copyright©2015,T.S.JoyceFirstelectronicpublication:
September2015
T.S.Joycewww.tsjoycewrites.wordpress.com
AllRightsAreReserved.Nopart
ofthisbookmaybeusedorreproducedinanymannerwhatsoeverwithoutwritten
permission,exceptinthecaseofbriefquotationsembodiedin
criticalarticlesandreviews.The
unauthorizedreproductionordistributionofthiscopyrightedworkisillegal.Nopartofthis
bookmaybescanned,uploadedordistributedviatheInternetoranyothermeans,electronicorprint,withouttheauthor’spermission.
NOTEFROMTHEAUTHOR:
Thisbookisaworkoffiction.Thenames,characters,places,andincidentsareproductsofthe
writer’simaginationorhavebeenusedfictitiouslyandarenottobeconstruedasreal.Anyresemblancetopersons,livingordead,actual
events,localeororganizationsisentirelycoincidental.Theauthordoesnothaveanycontroloveranddoesnotassumeanyresponsibilityforthird-partywebsitesortheir
content.
PublishedintheUnitedStatesofAmerica
ChapterOne
Thethwack,thwackof
EastonNovak’saxdrivingintobirchlogsechoedthroughthequietclearing.
Inasmoothmotion,hepushedthesplitwoodoff
intothegrowingpilebesidehimandstackedanotherwidelogontotheoldchoppingblock.Afterswingingtheaxhandlebehindhim,helifteditintheairandblastedthebladethroughthewood.Againandagain,heswunghisaxuntilhehadenoughforacordoffirewood.That
wasn’tthepointofthis,though.Thepurposewasn’ttoprepareforwinter.Thecoldmonthswerebehindhim,afterall.Itwasearlyspringandhealreadyhadenoughwoodtolasthimamonthofdeepsnow,plusacoupleofcordstosell.
Thepointwastosettle
theanimalthatsnarledconstantlydeepinsideofhim.Hehadworktodo.Oh,hesawhowtheotherGrayBackslookedathim.Thegirls,Willa,Gia,andGeorgiaweremoretolerant,buthestillscaredhiscrewonsomelevel.
Asheshould.
Iftheyknewwhatwasreallygoingoninsideofhim,Creedwould’veputhimdownyearsago.
Thiswasn’tworking.Allofthephysicalexertionwasn’tsettlinghimenough.Itneverdid.He’dhavetoChange.Maybefightandbleed,too.Therestlessness
thatwashedoverhimlatelywassuffocating.Hisbearwasstrugglingforbreathinsideofhim,clawingandtearing.Hedidn’tknowwhatthedamnedthingwasfightingagainst.Andhesureasshitcouldn’ttellanyoneelsewhatwaswrong.Hecouldn’tevenfigureouthisownanimal.
TheotherGrayBackscalledthemselvesmisfits,butnoneofthemcouldeventouchthebaggagehecarried.
Theflutterofwingssoundedbehindhim,andEastonthrewanarrow-eyedglareoverhisshoulder,butthebranchesoftheoldpinethatshadedhistrailerwere
empty,saveneedlesandpinecones.
Grittinghisteeth,Eastonpeeledhisshirtoffandwipedthesweatfromhisface.Withanirritatedsigh,hetossedhisshirtontotherailingofthestairsthatledtohisfrontdoor,thenpulledanotherlogontothechopping
block.Anotherflutterof
wings,andhewasgoingtokillthefuckingbirdwhowasscratchingatthememorieshewantedtokeepburied.No,thememoriesthatheneededtokeepburied,orhisbruinsilverbearwasgoingtoriphimtoshredsonhiswayout.
Flap,flap,scritch,scratch.
Shewasn’treal.Notreal,notreal.Theravenwasaghost,justlikeTessahadbeenJason’sghost.Thebirdhadlefthimalonealltheseyears,butnowthathe’dadmittedtoseeingTessa,theghostravenwasbackto
torturehim.Hecrackedtheblade
downthecenterofalog.Flap,flap.“Stopit,”he
murmured.Helaughedasthe
kneehighgrasstickledhisfrailshoulders.
Eastonblinkedhard
andslammedtheaxdown.Hecouldn’tdothisagain.Nottoday.
Flap,flap.“Leavemealone,”he
growledout.Dadpickedhimup
andswunghimaroundandaround.EastonlaughedlouderasDadtickledhim
andraspedhisbeardacrosshisface.SillyDad,alwaysreadytoplay.
“Dinner,”Momyelledfromthefrontporchoftheircabin.Mom.Home.Safety.Everythingwascherry.Mommadeapiefordesert.Thesweetsugargranulessmelledsogoodon
thewind.Sugarandwheat,andhisstomachgrowled,readytoeat.
“Myhungrylittlebear,”Dadsaid,tuckinghimunderhisarmandtrompingthroughthetallgrass.
Eastonsmiledupatthetreebranchwherehisravensat,watchinghim.Her
headwascocked,andsheblinkedslowasDadcarriedhimupthestairs.Eastonwavedjustbeforethedoorclosedbehindthem.
Hungrylittlebear.“Isaidstopit!”
Easton’slegsbuckledunderhimashedroppedtheax.
Flap,flap.
Withasnarl,hepulledhisknifefromthesheathonhisbeltandturned.Inoneswiftmotion,heflippedthebladeandthrewitatthebranchwheretheghostravensat.Theknifesunkintothebark,andtheflappingofwingsfilledhishead.Shewasgone,butasingle,shiny,
blackfeatherfloatedthiswayandthatinfrontofthetrunkofthepine.Eastondrewbackinhorror.“You’renotreal.”
Shewasn’t.Couldn’tbe.
Helurchedforwardandpickedupthefeather.Itfeltrealenough,softandlight.Smoothasheranhis
fingerdownthelengthofit.Thefeatherevensmelledlikeher—hisraven.Chillsblasteduphisarmsashesearchedthebranchesabove.
Hewouldhavetoburnherthings.
Hewouldhavetosetfiretothetrinketshecherishedthemost.
Chestheaving,Eastonclimbedthestairstohistrailerandthrewopenthedoor.Hekeptthegiftsshe’dbroughthimunderhisbedinanold,plastictacklebox.Eachsectionwaslabeledwithayear,andfilledwiththetinytreasuresshe’ddroppedinplacesforhimtofind.
Hesanktohiskneesandyankedthelidopen.Hairberets,rubberbands,paperclips,andanythingsmallthatglintedinthesun.Thelastcompartmentwasempty.
Eastonswalloweddownthelossthatfilledhimandpressedthefeatherintoit.
Shewasaghost,andhecouldn’tkeepher.Notanymore.Heowedittohiscrewtomoveon.
Everytrinketheldamemory,andhewouldhavetowatchthemburn,onebyone.
Nottoday,though.Todayhewasn’t
strongenough,butmaybetomorrowhewouldbanishtheghostraven.
ChapterTwo
Itwashim.AvianaKingclutched
herarmtohermiddle,wishingforthepaintostop.
Asobclaweditswayupherthroat.
Itwashim.Herbear.Easton.
Easton,theoneshe’dgrownupwith.
Easton,theoneherhearthadlatchedonto.
Easton,theboywhobroke.
Ithadtobehim.Hiseyeswerethatsamebright
greencolorshe’dneverseenonanotherperson.Helookeddifferentnow.Harder.Feral.Hefeltdifferent,too.Scarier.Thepowerthatrolledfromhisshouldershadwashedoverherravenformandterrifiedher.Herfeathershadlifteduncomfortablyfromherskinjustbeingthatcloseto
him.Now,hewasoneof
thewildbearsherpeoplespokeof.Oneofthedangerousones.
Tearsblurringhervision,shestudiedthelongsliceunderherarm.Bloodstreamedfromitlikeacrimsonriver.He’dbecome
betterwithblades.Muchbetterthanwhenhewasaboy.
Shehatedthebears,butsheenviedtheirhealingabilities.Ravenshiftersdidn’trepairthemselvessoeasily.
Eastonhadhurther.Clutchingherarm,
shecurledinonherself,
nakedinthewoodsandmiserableatthememoryofhiswildface.
Thesweetboyshe’dknownwasgone.
Theflutterofbirdwingsdrewagaspfromherlips.Whenshelookedupintotheevergreencanopy,itwasonlyawoodpecker,nota
raven.Still,itwasastarkreminderthatsheshouldn’tbehere.Thiswasagainstalltherules,andifherpeoplefoundoutshewassoclosetothebears,she’dbeshunned.
Avianastood,ignoringthejoltingpaininherarm.Herpileofclotheswasneatlyfoldedovera
youngtree’slow-hangingbranchtokeeptheforestfloorbugsfromthem.
Shedressedquicklyandjoggeddowntohercarthatwasattheendofadeertrailshe’dfollowedin.Shedroveatrustywhitesedanwhoseeasilymuddiedcolorandshoddysuspensionwere
notmadefortherockyterrainandpothole-riddledroadsinthesemountains.Moreproofshedidn’tbelonginthewoods.Notanymore.She’dbeenrippedfromthemlongagoandhadfoughttoothandnailtomoveon.
Anddammit,she’dledagoodlife.Asafeone
withfriendsandfamilyandadventures.She’dneverwantedforfoodorclothing,andshe’dbeenabletofollowherdreamsofbecomingaschoolteacher.Sowhyhadn’tshebeenabletostopthinkingaboutEastonafteralltheseyears?
Withalong,steadying
exhalation,sheslidbehindthewheel.Sheturnedthecararoundandheadedforthemainroadthatwouldleadtoherchildhoodhome.
He’dbeenhereallalong.She’dgonebacktohisterritoryonceacoupleofyearsago,butithadbeenapparentEastonhadleftit
longago.She’dbeenriddledwithsuchguiltwhenshe’dleft,shehadforcedherselftostopsearching.Itwasthepromiseshe’dmadetoherfather.Thefirstpromiseshe’deverbroken.
Evennow,anotheroverwhelmingwaveofremorsewashedoverher.
Avianagrippedthesteeringwheelandwilledherselftostopfeelingbad.Ifanything,seeinghimlikethatwasforthebest.Nowshecouldstopthinkingandobsessingabouthim.Shecouldstopimagininghiminhisadultform,fantasizingthathewasashappyandfetchingas
she’dthoughthewaswhentheywereyounger.
Now,equippedwithhisangrysnarlandthevitriolwithwhichheflungthatknifetokill,shecouldgetoverhim.ShecouldmoveonandacceptCaden’sproposal.She’dalreadyquitherjobathisrequest.Allthatwasleft
todowassayyestothesmallceremonyhe’dproposed.Shewasofbreedingage,andCadenhadbeenkindtoofferheraplaceathisside.
Shewaslucky.Hewashandsomeandcunning,andhisproposalhadbeenhighlysoughtafter.Hewasperfectlynice.Perfectlynice.
Shecouldbearhimchildrenandraisethem,createtheperfectnestforthefamilyshewouldbuildwithCaden.
Herlifewouldbeeasy.
Herlifewouldbeplanned.
Anothertearrolleddownhercheek.
Herlifewouldbeperfect.
Aflawless,emotionlessexistencebecauseshe’dgivenherheartawayyearsagotoabrokenboywithasilvergrizzlyinsideofhim.
Andnowthatboywasdead.
Afterdrivingmilesofwindingbackroads,Avianapulledhercartoastopinfrontofthecabinshe’dgrownupin.Itwasabandonednow,butthehousefromhermemorieswasbeautiful.Momhadsetupsummerrosegardensallaroundtheporchandhung
pottedplantsfromtheraftersovertheporchswing.Insidehadbeensmall,buttidyandcomfortable.Ithadbeenahome,andoneshe’dconnectedwithmorethananyotherthatfollowed.
Now,thelogsthatmadethewallshadfadedtograyandsplintered.Thethick
groutbetweenthelumberhadcrackedandchipped.Theroofsagged,andonthenorthside,mosshadgrownoverthewoodenshingles,givingitthelookofafairycottage.Someofthewoodenfloorboardsweremissingandsplitonthefrontporch,andtherailingwasbrokenand
saggingofftheside,butthatdidn’tbotherherasmuchaswhathadhappenedtotheinside.
Leaksandrothadruinedallofthefurnitureherfamilyhadleftbehind.Theplumbingdidn’tworkanymore,andherparents’bedwasnothingbutsoft
woodenshardsinapileontheirbedroomfloor.Theplacesmelledmustyanddank,andthelackofelectricitymadestayinginthisplacerough.Thewindowshadbeenbroken,andseeingitlikethisnow,thecozyhomefromherchildhoodmemorieswavered.
Asachild,she’dfeltsafehere.
Asanadult,shefeltvulnerableandexposed.
Shewouldn’tbeherelong,though.Justanothernight,andshe’dgobacktoRapidCityandgiveCadenheranswer.She’dkepthersuitorwaitingforayear.
Longerthanshehadanyrighttomakeanymanwait.Shewasn’tplain,butshewasnobeauty.Herjokesmadeherpeopleuncomfortable.Herhumanfriendsattheschoolshe’dworkedathadlaughed,butshewasineptatdecipheringbetweenpitylaughsandgenuine
amusement.Cadenwasagoodman,andshewasluckyhe’dofferedtogiveherahome.
Maybeifshejustkepttellingherselfthat,itwouldfeeltrue.
Avianatookadragofthemustyairinsidethedoorandshookherhead.This
placehadgonetoruinwithoutsomeoneheretokeepitalive.
ItremindedherofEaston.
Anotherwaveofdisappointmentcloggedherthroatassheopenedherlaptop.Thirtypercentbatteryleft,butitwasenoughtosay
goodbyetoEastoninherownsillyway.
ShemadehercellphoneintoahotspotandpulledupCoraWright’spro-shifterWebsite.Thiswaswherethiswholeadventurehadstarted.Therewasalinktoalistofregisteredbearshiftersinthecountry.
Thiswaswhereshe’dfoundEaston.Howcoulditnotbehim?She’dnevermetanyoneelsewiththeuniquename,andhewasabearshiftertoboot,registeredwithacrewofnotoriouslyviolent,aggressive,unsavorybearscalledtheGrayBacks.
Sheskimmedthrough
hisregistrationinformationagain.Six-two,leanbuild,greeneyes,darkhair.Silverbear.Surname:Novak.Shehadn’tknownthatfrombefore.
AvianaNovak.Stopit.Shewasdestinedto
bepairedwithCaden.She
wouldbehisperfectmatch.Everyonesaidso.
Fromthere,sheclickedovertoJasonTrager’ssocialmediapage.NoneoftheotherGrayBackshadoneshecouldfind.
AjoltofshockzingedthroughherasapictureofEastonshowedupatthetop
ofhisfeed.Init,EastonstoodinbetweenJasonandawomanwithmedium-lengthredhair,obviouslydyedandstraightenedsothoroughly,itspikedoutofahighponytail.Theywereallsmiling,evenEaston.Hiswassmallerthantheothertwo,andalittlebewildered,butitwasthere.
Avianafrownedandtriedtoconnectthisfacewiththeferociousonehe’dwornwhenshe’dseenhim.
Underneaththepicture,Jasonhadtypedhashtagsammysbar,hashtagcteamcocaptains,hashtagwillawonka,hashtagreleasethebeast,hashtag
beastonbromance.Beaston?Thenickname
certainlyfitthemonsterwho’dcutherwithaknifetoday.
Heseemedtohavefriendsifthispicturewasanythingtogoby.Avianaleanedbackinherchairand
crossedherarms.Shesquintedathissmile.Hewasveryhandsomewithhisfacerelaxedlikethis—moreliketheboyshe’dknown.Sowhydidheliveinatrailerseparatefromhiscrew?She’ddoneherspyingonthem,andtheGrayBackslivedagoodthreehundredyardsaway.
Anditwasplainasdaythemanwasfightingsomemightybigdemonsthewayhewaschoppingthatwoodsorelentlessly.Aterrifyinggrowlhadbeenconstantinhisthroat.
Butthenagain,she’dseenwhathappenedtohim.She’dcomeherehopinghe
turnedoutokayaftereverything,buthehadn’t.Thecircumstancesofhislifehadturnedhimintoamonster.
Shewasdisappointed.Thereitwas.Okay,
shewasdisappointedthathehadn’tbeenstrongenoughtofindhappiness.TheEaston
she’dknownwasinvincible.She’dcomeherein
hopesshecouldconvinceherselfhehadturnedoutallrightdespiteallthatshitthathadhappenedtohim,buthehadn’t.AndnowshewouldhavetogobackandlivethisemptylifewithCaden,andallthewhileshe’dwonder
whatif?Whatifshe’dbeen
abletostickaroundforhimwhentheywerekids?
Whatifshe’dcomebacktofindhimearlierbeforehe’dturneddark?
Whatifshe’deverrevealedherselfasaperson—arealfleshandbonefriend—
insteadofjustanattentiveraven?
Whatifshewasthereasonhewassolostnow?
Herlowbatterysignalflashedandthescreenwentdark.
“No,”shewhisperedasEaston’sslightlybaffledsmilefadedtoblack.
Shecouldn’tgonow.Avianashookherheadandclosedhereyesatthethoughtofleaving.Easton,orBeaston,wasterrifying.Hell,hisentirecrewbroughtshiversupherspine.Bloodthirsty,violentapexpredatorswhoobliteratedeverythingintheirpath.They
wouldeatapeacekeepingravenlikeherforbreakfastandpicktheirrazorteethwithherbones.
ButEaston’slifewasnowmoremysteriousthanithadeverbeen,andshehadtoheedwhateverwasdrawinghertohim.
Shewouldseethis
thingthrough.Shehadto.Becausealifeofwhat
ifswasnolifeatall.
ChapterThree
Eastonpulledhis
knifefromthesheathathishipandcutinoneswiftmotiontheziptiethatboundatrioofthickcableloops.
Mattwatchedhim
thoughtfully.Hedidthatalot—triedtofigureEastonout.Itwasannoying,butthenagain,everythingwasannoying.
Mattshiftedhisweightandleanedbackonthegiantstackofprocessedlogsbehindhim.“IbettherealreasonClintonleftis
becauseyounevermadeaknifeforhim.”
Eastonhuffedalaughandshookhishead.“Clintonleftbecausehe’saD-teamdick.Hisbaddecisionshadnothin’todowithme.”
“Thinkaboutit,”Mattsaid.“Hebeggedyouforonefromthefirsttimehefigured
outyoumadethem.Maybeifyougavehimaknife,he’dcomebacktotheGrayBacks.”
Eastonlookeddownatthelong,sharpbladeoftheknifehealwayscarried.Hehadn’tmadeClintonaknifebecausehehadn’tdeservedtheeffort.Willa,Gia,and
Georgiahad.Eastonranfromthe
housetotheshedwhereDadwasworking.Inthebranchesofanoldaldertree,theravencawed.HegrinnedandwavedtoherasheblastedhislittlelegsfastertowardDad’sworkshop.
Shakinghisheadto
wardoffthememory,Eastonsaid,“Clintonwon’tevercomeback.Hedon’tbelongwithus.”
“Wheredidyoulearntomakeyourknivesanyway?”
Inaflutterofwings,theravenswoopeddownfromthetoweringalderand
landedonthesplinteredwindowsilloftheshed.Eastongaspedashegottoseeherupcloseforthefirsttime.Slowlyandcarefully,hepaddedtowardthewindow.Shewascarryingsomethingshinyinherbeak,andwhenheapproached,shesetasmallbentpaperclipdownon
theledge.Hethoughtshewouldflyaway,butshedidn’t.Sheonlywatchedhimwhilehepickedupthesmallgiftandturneditinhishands.
“Thankyou,”hewhispered.
“Thatravensurelikesyou,”Dadsaid.Hewasleanedagainsthiswork
benchwatchingthebig,blackbirdwithhisarmscrossedoverhischestandhisheadcocked.
Eastonlookedatherproudly,soclosehecouldalmosttouchher.Pocketingthepaperclip,hesaid,“She’smybestfriend.”
Asoftsobwhipped
aroundonthebreeze,easyforhissensitivehearingtopickup.
“Mom’scrying.”Dadnarrowedhis
eyesandturnedhisbacktocontinuesharpeningathinknifeblade.“Well,letherhavesometimealone.She’llgetoverit.”
Eastonsidleduptothetableandfingeredasetofclamps.“What’swrongwithher?”
Withasigh,Dadturnedandsquatteddowntoeye-levelwithEaston.“Son,yourmomma’sgoingtohaveanotherbaby.”
Asmilespreadacross
Easton’sfaceashethoughtofabrotherorsistertoplaywith.Anothersobcarriedonthewindfromthehouse.Hefrowned.
Dadruffledhishair.“Yourmomma’sscared.Shefanciesshehasthesightandcanseeherfuture.Shethinksthebabywillbehardtohave,
butshe’sjustbeingemotional.Humanwomenarelikethat.Softandfulloftears.”
“Shedoesn’twantthebaby?”
“Shewill.”Dadstoodandblewonthenewlysharpenedbladeoftheknifehewasmaking.
ButEastonknewallaboutbabies.Theyhadraisedpigsallhislife,andhe’dseenhowtheboargotthesowswithpiglets.“IfMomdidn’twantababy,whydidyouputoneinher?”
Dadtossedhimahardlookandwentbacktoexaminingthesharpened
silver.“Somedayyou’llunderstand.Yourmommaisflighty,andIdon’twantherleavingus.Nowshewon’t.Notwithtwocubstoraise.Sometimesyouhavetomaketheharddecisionsforthepeopleyouwanttokeeparound.”
Eastonwincedashe
puthisweightonhisbadleg,theoneWillahadruinedwhenhe’dTurnedherwithoutherconsent.Allbecausehewantedtokeepheraround.Dadhadbeenwrong.Makingdecisionsforwomengothisbonessnapped,andthenCreedhadorderedtheGrayBacksnotto
sethisbrokenleg.He’ddoneashittyjoboftryingtofixithimself,andnoweverystephetook,manorbear,hurt.Hislimpwouldalwayshurt.
“Hellooo,”Mattdrawled,wavinghishandinfrontofEaston’sface.
Red,boilingragetookhismiddle,andhesnapped
histeethhardatMatt’shand.Mattflinchedbackandcursed.“I’mnotchallenging,”hesaid,handsraisedinsurrenderashesteppedaway,nevergivinghimhisback.
“Beaston!”PowercrackedinCreed’svoiceasheyelledfromunderthe
skylinewherehewassecuringnewcables.“Don’tyoufuckingdoittoday.Damonfinallyliftedournumbers.He’strustingusmore.Don’truinthisshiftforus.”
Easton’sbearsquirmedinsideofhim,burninghimfromthemiddle
outindesperationtoescape.Hewasn’tevenmadatMatt.Thememoriesmadeitsohecouldn’thelphimself.Fightingmadethemgoaway.
Withasnarl,heturnedandskiddedovertheledgeofthelanding.Below,therewasasteepmountainsideclutteredwith
felledlumbertheBoarlandershadcutdownfortheGrayBackCrewtostripandloadforshipmenttoSaratoga.Theterrainwassteepanduneven,andonewrongmisstepmeantalumberavalanchethatwouldgocareeningdownthehillside,pickingupsteamanddemolishinganythinginits
path.Helovedthisjob.Therewasalwaysanedgeofdangerineverythinghedid.Here,hecouldfocusbetterthananyplaceelseonearth.WhichwaspatheticsincehestillfoughttheotherGrayBacksallthefuckingtime.IrritationbubbledinsideofhimasheheadedtowhereJasonwas
standingonastackoflogsandwritingnumbersonhisclipboard.Cladinayellowhardhatlikehisown,Jasonwaseasytospot.
“Hey,youokay?”Jasonasked.
“I’mfine.”Hisdarkeyebrows
shotupasheshookhishead
andwentbacktoscribblingontheclipboard.“Layoffmyhidetoday,willyou?I’mstillsorefromourrowyesterday.”
“Sorry,”Eastonmutteredasheclimbedontothepilenexttohisfriend.Andhereallywas.HelikedtheGrayBacksmorethananyotherpeopleintheworld,
butthathadn’tstoppedhisneedtofightwiththem.
“Creedwillkillmesoon,”Eastonsaid,dragginghisgazetowherehisalphawasclimbingintothemachineryundertheskyline.
“Hewon’t.”“Hewill.”“Easton,”Jasonsaid,
slappingtheclipboardagainsthisthigh.“Anyonemesseswithyou,they’llhavetoclawtheirwayovermycoldandlifelessbodytodoit.”Jasoninhaledslowlyandleveledhimalook.“Breathe.”
Eastondrewaslow,deepbreathandfeltthefireinsideofhimcoolbya
fraction.“Thereyougo.Now
thinkaboutit.Creedhasputalotoftimeintorehabbingyou.Hedidn’tkillyouwhenyouTurnedWilla,didhe?”
Eastonshookhishead,stilluncertainabouthisfuture.
“AndnowCreed
wouldhavetoanswertothegirlsifheputyoudown.Willawouldfilethimandsuckonhismarrow,Giawouldboothimoutoftheirtrailer,andGeorgiawouldshoothisass.Nobody’sgivinguponyou,soyoudon’tgiveuponyoueither.Okay?”
Theflutterofwingsinthetreelinedistractedhim.
“Easton,”Jasonmurmured,grippinghisshoulder.“Okay?”
“Yeah,”Eastonsaidwithajerkynod.
“Good.Nowmakeittodaywithoutbleedingus,andmeandyouwillgointo
townlaterandgrababeer.”“Creedwon’tagreeto
that.”“Hewillifitkeepsus
ontrackwithournumberstoday.”Jasonjumpedoverapileofbeetle-infested,deadlodgepolepinesandmadehiswayuptowardtheprocessor.“Chestup,eyesahead,and
focus,Beaston.Nobleedingtoday,andI’llbuy.”
Beaston.Hecouldn’tdecideifhelikedthatnicknameornot.Itcertainlyfithisinnermonster,butitwasalsoastarkreminderthathewasdifferent.Moreabrasive,morecombative,lessincontrol.
Withasigh,hereachedinhispocketandpulledoutthebentpapercliphisravenhadgiftedhimallthoseyearsago.Ithadn’tbeenMatt’sfaultfordredgingupmemories.Itwashisownfortuckingthistrinketinhispocketthismorning.
Hisdadhadscoffedat
Momforthinkingshehadthesight,buthe’dbeenafooltoshrugoffthingshedidn’tunderstand.Momwasspecialandcouldseethingsnooneelsecould.Eastonhadn’tunderstooduntilhegotolder,butshe’dgiftedhimwiththeabilitytoseethingsinthebeyond,too.He’dseenthe
ghostofJason’sfirstmatewhentheothershadn’tbeenableto.
Eastonliftedhisgazefromthepaperclipinhishandstotheraveninthetreeacrosstheclearing.
Andnowhecouldseehisghostraven.
Dadhadbeenwrong
aboutalotofthings.
ChapterFour
Avianasatstunnedon
thebranch,trappedinEaston’sgaze.
He’dkeptthepaperclip.
Sheremembered
everytrinketshe’deverfound.Itwasablessingandacursetoaraven.Somanybaublesbouncedaroundinherhead,buthermemorywasimpeccable,andshewasn’tabletoletgoofevenone.
Thathadbeenthefirstgiftshe’devergiventohim.
She’ddoneittogethismindoffhisMomcryinginsidethesmallcabinhesharedwithhisparents.She’dgivenittoEastontoshowthatshecared,andthenhe’dgoneandrewardedherbytellinghisdadshewashisbestfriend.
Thatday,she’dgivenhimthefoldedpaperclipand
herheart.Fromthebranchshe’d
dugherclawsinto,shecouldhearhislow,rumblinggrowlbeforeherippedthoseeeriegreeneyesawayfromherandlookedbackatamanclimbingdownthemountainsidetowardhim.
Tinyheartbeat
pounding,shebouncedsidewaysdownthelimbandhidbehindthebodyofthetree.Thetreewashurting,anditsspiritalmostfadedtonothing.Pinebeetleshadsuffocatedandstarvedit.Shecouldfeelitspain,butthatwasnothingcomparedtotheacheofwatchingwhathad
transpiredwithEastonandtherestofhiscrew.
Hewasstruggling.Anoutcastinacrewofoutcasts.Itseemedhewasintroublewithhisalpha,butshecouldn’tfigureoutwhy.ItwasapparenthewasonthevergeofaChange,too.Hiseyeshadalwaysblazedlikea
demon’swhenhewasclosetoaChange,butinthelasttwodays,theglowhadbeenconstant.
Shelikedthatman,theonewiththeclipboardwho’ddaredtogripEaston’sshoulderdespitetheterrifyingrumbleinhisthroat.He’dtriedtomakeEastonfeel
betteraboutthingsshewashelplesstounderstand.
Itwassuddenlyoverwhelming,theyearsthatstoodbetweenthem.
She’dmissedmostofhislife.
Therewastragedyinthat.
Atrioofheavysteel
cables,hangingfromalinehighabove,blasteddownthemountainside.TherewasstaggeringpowerinthemachinethatpushedthecablestowardEastonandtheotherGrayBack.Matt?ItwashardtoputtheirfacestothepicturesonJason’ssocialmediawhentheywere
wearingyellowhardhats.EastonandMatt
workedtotiethelongcablesinloopsaroundlogs,threeatatime.Thentheygesturedwithathumbsuptothealphaabovethemonaledge,andthelogsweredraggeduptheslopeatafrighteningspeed.Tirelesslytheyworked,
hookinglogs,alwaysrunningaround,jumping,sure-footedasmountaingoats.Eastonsportedalimpnow,butitdidn’tseemtohinderhiswork.Painslashedthroughherchestwhenshesawhimwince,though.
Perhapshislimpwasfromthebeartrap.
ItwasMarchandstillcoolupinthemountains,butEastononlyworeawhiteT-shirtandthreadbarejeanswithholesinthekneesoverheavyworkboots.Hispantsclungtohistaperedwaistandpowerfullegs.Whenshewasyounger,shethoughtEastonthemostdashingboyshe’d
everlaideyeson,butEastonthemanwasaworkofart.Hiscutarmspressedagainstthethinfabricofhisshirt,andasthedayworeonandheworkedupasweat,hisshirtclungtothedefinedmusclesinhisback.Andwhenhelinkedhishandsbehindhisheadwhilewaitingforthe
cablestocomeflyingbackdownthehillsideathim,shecouldmakeoutrippedabsasthedampmaterialclungtohistorso.Hisskinwastannedfromtheoutdoormanuallabor,andatonepoint,hesmiledatJasonwhowasworkingabigmachinethatstrippedthelimbsofflogs
andleveledtheends.Easton’steethwerewhiteandstraight.Ifhewouldonlysmiledeepenough,she’dbeabletomakeouttheshallowdimpleshe’dhadwhenhewasaboy.Theonesheusedtoflashherbeforeeverythinggotsomessedup.Beforehewasbroken.
Eastonwasstunning.Masculine,lithe,powerful.FullofbarelycheckedaggressionasheworkedalongsideMatt,whoseemedtodigatEaston’snerveswhenhespoke.Eastonwasterrifyingandbeautiful,likeatornadoshe’dwitnessedfromadistancewhenshewasten.
Shecouldn’ttakehereyesoffhim.
Herheartratewouldn’tsettledown,anditleftherfeelingdizzy.ShegrippedhertinytalonsintothebarkmoresecurelyasEastonrolledhisneckandwipedhischeekontheshoulderofhisshirt.
Thisfeelingrighthere—thebreathless,stomach-dipping,bewilderedone—thiswaswhatfallingforamanshouldfeellike.Perhapstheelderscould’veconvincedherthisfeelingdidn’texistifshehadn’talreadyfeltit.Cadenhadformallyaskedtocourther,andfortwelvelong
months,she’dbeentryingtoforceherselftofeelsomething—anything—forhim.
ButafterseeingthatbentpapercliponEaston’spalmtoday,anyhopeofsettlingforCadenwaslost.
Eastonasaboyhadtemptedherheart.
Eastonasamanwasruiningherforanyoneelse.
****Asthesunsankdown,
half-hiddenbehindthemountains,thealphawavedhiscrewuptotheledgehestoodon.TheychuckledatsomethingJasonsaid,allbutEaston,whostaredatthe
groundasifitheldtheanswerstoallthesecretsintheworld.
Therestofthecrewloadedintoafat-tiredcharcoalgraytruck,butEastongotbehindthewheelofanold,beat-upwhiteFordtruckandtookoffbehindtheotherpickupalone.
Avianafollowed,desperatetowatchhimaslongasshecouldmanagewithouthimnoticing.Gettingclosetohimnearhistrailerwasn’tanoptionanymore.Notwithhisimpeccableaimwithknives.Butouthere,wheretherewasmoreroomandmoretreestohideher,
shefeltsafetoobservehim,asshe’ddoneforsomanyhoursinheryouth.
SheflittedfromtreetotreeastheGrayBacksbouncedandbumpeddownswitchbacksandolddirtroadsthatledthemtowardtheGraylandMobilePark.Findinghercourage,she
circledhighaboveasEastonparkedhistruckbesidetheonehiscrewrodein,thenhestrodethroughthewoodstohismobilehome.Inthetrailerpark,theotherGrayBacksreunitedwiththeirmates.Somewereplayful,likeMattandWilla,andotherssweet,likeJasonand
Creedwiththeirwomen.ThosemadeherlookawayandswoopbacktowardEaston’sterritory.
Hehadnoonetocomehometo.
Sorrowandhopechurnedinhermiddle.EvenamongtheGrayBacks,helivedasolitaryexistence.
Perhapshedidn’twantamate.Orperhapshecouldn’thandleoneaftereverythingthathadhappened.Ormaybe,justmaybe,hehadn’tfoundtherightwoman.
Thatlastpartlitherupwithlonging.
Shewastoochickentoshowherself.Shehadn’t
beenabletodoitinheryouth,andtheruleshadn’tchanged.Noonecouldknowravenshiftersexisted.Especiallyterrifying,murderousbearshifters.
ButEastonwasdifferent.
Fromhighabove,shewatchedhimstride
deliberatelyintohistrailer.Thedoorbangedclosedbehindhim.
Washedifferent?Herarmwasstillcut
fromwherehe’dhurther,andhe’dseemedbarelyincontrolofhimselfathisjobsite.
Maybeshewasjustfoolingherselfintothinking
hewastheboyshe’dgrownupwith.Hiswildeyessaidthatpartofhimwaslonggone.
But…thepaperclip.Baffled,sheflapped
herwingsandcaughtanaircurrentthatpushedhertowardthecabinshe’dgrownupin.Sheneededtimeto
thinkaboutallofthis.Andsomethingelsewasweighingheavyonhermindnow—somethingthatmadehercringetoconsider.
SheneededtocallCaden.
Beingthecarefulravenshewas,Avianasearchedaperimeteraround
herhousebeforesheChangedbackintoherhumanskin.Itwasn’tpainfulorslowlikeitwasforsomeshifters.Ravenswereluckyinthatrespect.Shejusttuckedheranimalawayinthespanofamoment,andherfeathersdisappearedlikemagic.Thestairssaggeddangerously
underherfeetasshepaddeduptothehouse,carefultoavoidthenailsthatstuckoutofthefloorboards.Herphonehadenoughcharge,soshescrolledthroughhercontactsandhitthecallbuttonwhenshefoundCaden’snumber.
Sheletoffalong,
steadyingbreathasitrang.“Hello?”Caden
asked.“Hi.It’sme.”“Aviana?Whereare
you?I’vebeencallingfortwodays,lookingforyoueverywhere.Youcan’tdothisshit.Ineedtoknowwhereyouareatalltimes,orthis
doesn’twork.”She’donlybeengone
twodayssohisreactionwasoverblown.
“Ithinkthat’saproblemforme.Imean,oneoftheproblems.Idon’tlikethatyouneedtokeeptabsonme.AndIdon’tlikethatyoumademequitajobIlove.”
Oh,shewasinitnow.“AndIdon’tparticularlylike…you.”Hervoicefadedoffonthelastword.Shewasn’ttrainedinbeingsodirectwithaman.“Thisisn’twhatIwant.Apairingbetweenusisn’tgoingtowork.”
Cadenwasquietforsolongshecheckedher
phonetoassureherselfhehadn’thungup.
“Andyou’vethoughtthisthrough?”heaskedinalow,steelyvoicethatbroughtashiverupherspine.“You’vethoughtaboutyourplacewithourpeople,andyouarefinewithyourrankstayingatthebottomwhere
you’vealwaysbeen?You’vethoughtaboutthefactyourrefusalofmycourtshipwillkeepyourfamilyatthebottom?”
Avianaswallowedthelumpinherthroatastearsstunghereyes.Shelovedherparentsanddidn’twantthemtobebeneathanyone,butshe
couldn’tlivealietoelevatetheirstatus.Shewouldonlygrowtoresentthem.“Y-yes.”
“Yes,what?”Avianagrittedher
teethandhatedherselfasshewhispered,“Yes,sir.”
“Whoishe?”Cadenasked.Theemptinessofhisvoiceechoedonandoninher
mind.“He’snotyou.”She
hungupthephoneasasobcreptupherthroat.
She’ddoneit,andpartofherwasproudshehadn’tjustgivenintowhatwasexpectedofher.Shewasproudshe’dstoodupforalifeshewanted.Buttherest
ofherwasscaredshitless.Cadenwasimportant,andtakinghislastnamewould’vegivenherfamilyamucheasierlife.Morerespect.
Butshewasn’tgivingupthecomfortablelifeCadencouldprovideforanothermaleraven,orGodforbid,ahumanmate.Shewasgiving
itupforEaston,amonstergrizzlywithlittleapparentcontrolwhohadtossedaknifeatherasthoughshewaslessthannothing.
Shewasbetrayingherpeoplebychoosingabear,butshecouldn’thelpherselfnow.Eastonwashers—hadalwaysbeenhers—and
comingbackheretofindhimevenmorebrokenthanwhenshe’dlefthimhadsealedherfatetohis.
Avianadidn’tknowhow,butshewasgoingtofindthecouragetotalktohim.
ChapterFive
Shecouldn’tdothis.Avianatookalong
pullofthefruitycocktailshe’dimploredthebartendertomake“extrapotent.”She’doverheardJasontelling
Eastonhewouldtakehimoutforadrink,andafterseeingthepictureofhimandEastonandwhoeverWillaWonkawas,Avianawasprettysuretheywouldgrabthatdrinkathashtagsammysbar.TheSammy’sBarinquestionwasaholeinthewallestablishmentonthemain
stripinSaratoga,completewithdimlighting,stickyfloors,andmismatchedchairsaroundscuffedwoodentables.Apooltablesatinthecorner,andastagesatemptyupfront.ThecoasterforherdrinkadvertisedtheBeckBrothersplayedlivemusiceveryweekend.
JasonandEastonprobablywouldn’tshow.
Good,becauseagain,shereallycouldn’tdothis.Herheartwaspoundingdouble-time,andherhandswereclammy.Twicealready,she’dalmostdroppedherdrinkonthetablebecauseshewasshakingsobadly.Ifshe
didthis,talkedtoEaston,itwouldchangeeverything.Itwouldputheratriskofbeingshunned,andwouldputher,alone,frailraven,inthepathofthemostvolatilegroupofbadassgrizzlyshiftersinthecountry.
“’Scuseme,miss,”amanwiththinninghairand
whiskybreathsaidfromthebarstoolbesideher.“Can’thelpbutnoticeyou’reherealoneanddressedlikeyou’rereadytoparty.”
Sheswungherdisgustedgazetohim.“Pissoff.”Shecringedandslappedherhandoverhermouth.Thatwasreallyrudeandnot
heratall.Thealcoholwasdefinitelytalkingnow.“Imean,pissoff…please?”
Themansnortedandturnedtohisfriendonhisotherside.
Thatwasasignitwastimetogo.Avianasuckeddowntherestofherdrinkandstood,onlytogaspandfall
backontothebarstoolthesecondshesawthedooropen.
Theywerehere.AndnotjustJasonandEastoneither,buttheentireGrayBackCrewfilteredinthroughthedoor.
Oh,greathairyballs,whatwasshegoingtodo
now?Panicking,sheslunkwithherbacktothebartotheveryendwheresheeyedarearhallwayandexitsign.
“Gottareleasethekraken,”WillaWonkaannounced.
“Geez,Nerd,”Mattsaid,shakinghisheadwithasmirkonhisface.“Justsay
youhavetotakeapiss.”“Don’ttellmewhatto
do,”thespunkyred-headsaidthroughaflirtygrin,pointingatherblue-eyedmate.
OhGod,ohGod,ohGod,thethreeGrayBackwomenarewalkingthisway.Actnatural.
Avianaslurpedextra
hardonthelastwatereddowndropsofherdrinkandwheezedwhenalemonseedshotthroughthestrawandpeltedherdeepintheesophagus.Shecouldn’tbreathe!Gasping,sheclutchedherthroatandtriedtodraginoxygen.
“Igotthis,sugartits,”
Willasaid.ShegrabbedAvianaaroundthestomachandnearlycrackedherripsinaquick,one-shotHeimlich.Thelemonseedshotoutofherthroatandontothebartop.Avianaturnedaround,mortified.
Willareachedforwardandgrabbedherboob.
“Honk,honk,you’rewelcome.”
“Areyouokay?”averypregnantbrunetteasked,grippingAvianabytheelbowasWillasaunteredoff,clutchinghertie-dyedpurseandhummingtoherself.
“Uh.”Besidesthefactthatshe’djustbeenfeltupby
awerebear?“Yes.Thankyou.”
“Good,”thewomansaidkindly.Asshewalkedoffbehindtheothertwo,AvianatriedtoplaceherfacefrompicturesonJason’ssocialmedia.Gia,humanmateofCreed,sheremembered.
Sheswunghergazetothebaronherothersidewheretherestofthecrewweresidlingupandorderingdrinks.Fromhere,shecouldseeEastonleanforward,aslightfrownmarringhisstrikingfeatures.Whenheturnedhishead,hisgazegrazedoverher.
Gasping,shefroze.Shecouldn’tdothis—nope,noway.
Meltingtothefloor,shecrawledaroundthecornerofthebarsohermovementwouldn’tcatchEaston’sattentionasshemadeherescape.
“Loseacontact?”
Willaaskedfromthebathroomdoorshewasholdingopenfortheothers.
“Oh!”Avianastoodandpressedherbackagainstthewall,hopefulthatEastonwouldn’thearWillatalkingtoherandcometoseewhatwasgoingon.Spreadoutlikeastarfish,sheclosedhereyes
andsidleddownthehallwaywall.
Whensheopenedhereyestoseehowcloseshewastotheexit,Willawasstandinginfrontofthebathroomdoor,armscrossedasshestaredather.“Yep,Icanstillseeyou.”Shenarrowedhereyesandcanted
herhead.“Youashiftergroupieorsomething?”
“No.Yes!Ilikebears.Theyseemvery…nice.”
“Liar.Yousoundandsmellterrified.”
“Right.I’mjustgoingtofindthebathroom.”
Willapointedtothedoordirectlybehindher.
“Thereshebe.”“Okay.”Aviana’s
wordswerecomingoutallbreathyasherthroatclosedaroundthem.“Thankyou.”
Willafollowedherinside,andnowshewastrappedbetweenherandtheothertwowhowerewashingtheirhands.Awerebear
sandwich,andhowfittingthatshewasthemeat.Awhimperclaweditswayupherthroat.
“Dudette,areyougoingtopassout?”Willaasked,asliverofworryinfiltratinghertone.
“Maybe?”Avianasaidasshepressedher
shoulderbladesagainstthetilewall.Sounsanitary,butrightnow,thegrimywallwastheonlythingproppingherupright.“Ishouldgo.”
“Ithinkyoushouldputyourheadbetweenyourknees,”Giasaid,castingheraworriedlook.
“Yes,”Aviana
whispered,sinkingtoasquattingpositiononthetile.Sheputherhandsbehindherheadandwaitedforthelightheadednesstofade.Onlynow,shewascompletelyvulnerabletothebears.Georgia,thoughshewasevenprettierinpersonthaninthepicturesonJason’spostswith
herwildhairandfreckles,feltdominant.Willa,too,andnowtheywereprobablygoingtoeather.
Agentlehandrubbedherback,andwhenshelookedup,thecurvyparkrangersmiledkindlydownather.“Iusedtobeafraidofbears,too.We’renotthat
bad,though.”Willasnorted,butGia
elbowedhersharply.IfAvianadidn’task
now,shewouldneverbuildupthecourageagain.Notafterthisdisastrousnight.“CanIaskyouapersonalquestion?”sheaskedWilla.
“Oooh,”Willa
drawledout,tossingherheadback.“Sorryabouttheboobgrab,butI’mtotallyintodudes.”
“What?”Avianaasked,utterlyconfused.
“Ilikethepene.”Willawaited,eyebrowsraisedhigh.“Thebratwurst?Thetalleywhacker,the
trousersnake,theone-eyedserpent,thedong,thelongschlong,thetadpoleshooter—”
“Willa,”Giasaid,fightingasmile.“Ithinkshegetsit.AndIalsodon’tthinkshewashittingonyou.”
“You’reverypretty,”Avianawhisperedinafraidy-
catvoice,“butIwasgoingtoaskyouaboutEastonNovak.”
“Beaston?”Willalookedutterlyshocked.
Infact,theyalllookedshocked.
“Whatdoyouwanttoknowabouthim?”Georgiaaskedcarefully.
“Ishe…isheseeinganyone?”
“Honey,you’dbebetteroffhittingonme.Youaren’texactlyEaston’stype,”Willasaid,leaningonthecounter.
“W-whatishistype?”shestumbledout.
“Serialkiller.”Willa
gotelbowedbyGiaagain.“Icanseetheappeal
becausehe’sveryhandsome,”Giasaidlow,“butyouarebarkingupthewrongtreewiththatone.”
“Morelikebarkingupthewrongforest,”Georgiasaid,rubbingherback.“Thatmanisn’tmeantforamate,
andespeciallynotawomanas…soft…asyou.Youseemverynice,butashygirllikeyouwouldsurehaveherworkcutoutforherwithamanlikeEaston.Bestyougethimoutofyourhead.”
Georgiaflashedherasympatheticsmileandstood.
AndasAviana
watchedthemfileoutofthebathroom,herheartsanktothedingytilebeneathherheels.
Gethimoutofherhead?
Ifshecould’ve,shewould’veforgottenaboutheraffectionforEastonalongtimeago.
Deflated,Avianawashedherhands,thenmadeherwaybackintothebar.Itwasn’tsointimidatingtostaynowthatshe’dmadeanassofherselfinfrontofhalfoftheGrayBackCrew.Thenightcouldn’tgetmuchworse,ashighlightedbyEaston’sindifferentglanceoverather
assheleftthehallway.Hedidn’trecognizeheratall.Which,yeah,shegotit.Shehadn’tevershownhimherhumanside,andravenshiftersdidn’thaveasmellunlesstheywereintheiranimalforms.Notlikefurrymammalshiftersdid.Tohim,shewasjustanotherplain
humanhangingoutinthebarhefrequented.
Shewantedtobuyanotherdrinktosoftenhersorrows,buttheGrayBacksweretalkingandlaughingitupatthebar,andshecouldn’tforceherselftogetthatclosetothemagain.Peeingherpantaloonsinfrightafterthat
utterlyembarrassingsceneinthebathroomwouldjustbethecherryontopofthenight.
ThetableinthedarkestcornernearthestagelookedliketheperfectplacetowatchEastonforthelasttime.Whatafailure.She’dcomeinherethinkingshecouldactuallytalktohim,
andtheclosestshe’dgottenwastalkingtosomeofhiscrew,whoprobablythoughtshewasacompleteninny.
Eastonsatstoicinthemiddleofthelaughteratthebar.Hewaspickingapartanapkinwithaslightfrowndrawingdownhisdarkeyebrows.Everyonceina
while,hesippedadrink,butitwasapparentthiswasn’thissceneorhehadsomeseriousthoughtsonhismind.
Shewasgoingtoleavewithoutseeinghisdimples.
Hereyesblurredwithpathetictears,andsheclutchedherpursecloserto
herlap.Amassiveman
blockedherentireviewofthebar.Shearchedherneckbacktotakeinhisfullheight.Darkhair,soft,sympatheticdarkeyes,andtwodrinksinhishands.“Beforeyouaskmetositdown,knowthatIwon’thitonyou.I’mhereona
reconnaissancemissiononly.”
Avianasniffledandwipedherdamplashes.“Aw,whatthehell.Willyousit?”
Themantooktheseatbesideher,freeingupherviewofEastonagain.Hesetared,sweet-smellingdrinkinfrontofherandtookalong
pullofhisown.Withasigh,hesaid,“Woman,you’vesetyoursightsononetoughtarget.”
“Idon’tknowwhatyoumean.”
“Yeah,youdo.WhyEaston?”
Sheshruggedmiserablyandtookapull
fromthecranberryvodkahe’dbroughther.“HeremindsmeofsomeoneIusedtoknow.”
“So,whydon’tyougotalktohim?”
“BecauseI’machicken.”Shesmiledsadlyandswunghergazetothebehemoth.“It’sinmy
inherentnature.”“Yourinherent
nature,”herepeatedinathoughtfulvoice.“So,ifyounevertalktohim,whatwillhappen?”
“I’llneverknowhim.”
“Andifyoutalktohim?”
“Worstcasescenario,herejectsmeinfrontofallofhisterrifyingfriends,scarsmeemotionally,Igiveuponevertalkingtoanothermanagain,drawintomyselfwithfearofbeinghumiliated,pushawayeveryoneinmylife,moveouttosomereclusivecave,andliveonbeavermeat
andwildberriesuntilIbecomeanunrecognizablehermitwithquestionablehygieneandanimaginarypetfox.”
“Well,thatwasgraphicandnotatallwhatwillactuallyhappenwhenyougooverthereandsayhitoEaston.”
“Oh,I’mnotdoingthat.Chicken,remember?”
“Sochugthatdrinkanddigdowndeep.FindthatbadassIknowishidingintheresomewhere.Hikeupyourbiggirlpantiesandmarchyoursexyassoverthereandmakehimnoticeyou.”
“Sexy,hmm.”Sheclinkedherdrinkagainsthis.“Flatterygetsyoueverywherewithme,mistergiant.”
Themanchuckledandjerkedhischinatherdrink.“Bottomsup,chicken.TheBeastonawaits.”
Hewasright.Ifsheleftwithouttalkingtohim,
she’dalwaysbedisappointedinherselfforgivingupbeforesheeventried.Feelingreckless,sheslurpedthedrinkdownandstood.“I’mgoingtodoit.”
“That’sthespirit.”“I’mgoingtogotalk
tohim.”“Youcandoit.”
Shestraightenedhertanktopoverherjeansandpulledherpurseoverhershoulder.Sheturnedtoleave,buthesitated.“I’mAviana.”
“Nicetomeetyou,Aviana,”themansaidwithaneasysmile.“I’mKong.”
Kong.Whatastrangename.“Thanksforthepep
talk.”Henoddedonce,his
darkeyesdancing.“Anytime.”
Avianasquaredhershouldersandsethereyesonthecrewatthebartop.
Shewasdefinitelygoingtodothis.
ChapterSix
Awomanclearedher
throatdelicatelybehindEaston.Heturnedonthebarstooltotellher“GrayBacksonly,”butthewordsgotstuckinhisthroatthe
momenthesawher.Shewasawispofa
woman.TallerthantinyWillaonlybyacoupleofinches,andwithafinebonelookthatsaidhecouldsnapherarmwithoutanyeffort.Herskinwastan,asmootholivetonethatmadeherclear-waterblueeyesevenmorestriking.
Long,darklashesmatchedstraightblackhair.
Whenhe’dseenhercomeoutofthebathroom,he’dtakennotice.Foraninstant,she’dlookedfamiliar.Ornotlooked,exactly.Shefeltfamiliar.Stupidfuckingthoughts.
Thewomanliftedher
overlybigeyestohim,thendroppedthemtohisworkbootsasifhisshitkickerswerethemostinterestingthingshe’deverseen.
Hiscrewgreweerilyquiet.AllexceptWilla,whomuttered,“Oh,shit,”andgrabbedthewoman’stremblinghandtosteadyit.
Toolatetohideherfearfromhim,though.Ifhecouldn’ttellshewasshakinginthosesexylittlepokey-heeledshoesshewaswearingunderthosetightjeans,hesureasshitcouldsmellhowterrifiedshewas.Acrid.Bitter.Heswallowedhardandwaitedforhisbearto
slashitswayoutofhisskin.Buthisinnermonster
stayedput.Infact,thelongerhe
satstaringatthestrangegirlinfrontofhim,themorehisbearshrankbackinsideofhim,asifhewasstunned.Orscared.Huh.Scaredofthiswoodsprite?
Eastonangledhisfaceawayfromhersuspiciouslybutnevertookhiseyesoffherdownturnedface.
“I’mAvianaMarieKing.”Sheghostedaglancetohim,thenbacktohisboots.“Isawyoufromoverthere,andIthinkyou’reveryhandsome.”Shegaspedatiny
sound,toolowforhumanears,butitperkedhissensesrightup.“You’recheekbonesaresharp,andyournosestraight…regal…bigmuscles…andyoureyes…Ilikethose.”Atinywhimperescapedherassheclampedhermouthclosed.
Eastonlookedtothe
facesofhiscrew,onebyone.WhenhegottoJason,hegrowledout,“Isthisajoke?”Ithadtobe.Noonehadeverpennedhimashandsome.Theyavoidedhisgazeandshieldedtheirchildren,butneveroncehadsomeonecalledhimwhatthisstrangewomanhad.Jasonmust’ve
daredhertocomeoverandtalktohim.Nowitmadesensewhyshewasthisnervous.
“Definitelynotajoke,”Jasonmuttered.“I’veneverseenherbefore.”
Thewomanwasclutchingherfistatherside,andherotherhandwas
graspingWilla’slikealifeline.Sheseemedtobewaitingforsomething.
Oh.Themannersthegirlshadbeenteachinghim.“I’mEaston.”Hisvoicecameoutagravellysnarl,andthewoman’sscentwentfromscaredtopetrified.Shit.“Sorry.”
Shelookedupthroughthoselong,darklashes.“Sorryforwhat?”
Heshookhishead,baffled.“Idon’tknow.”
Thetinyhumanstraightenedherspineandliftedherchin.“Iwanttobuyyouadrink.”
“ButIalreadyhave
—”Jasonshookhishead,
eyeswide.“Okay,”Eastonsaid,
rubbingthetwo-dayscruffonhisfaceself-consciously.Manners.“Thankyou.”
Avianahuffedarelieved,shakysighandreleasedherdeathgripon
Willa’shand.ThenshesatonthebarstoolJasonofferedherrightnexttoEaston.Rightnexttohim.Shesmelledlikevanilla.Nottheartificialkindinabottle,buttherealkindtocookwith.Helikedvanilla.Herhairwascleanandshinyandlookedsoftassilk,andshehadafacehewantedto
stareat.Cutenose,highcheekbones,andround,innocenteyes.Shedidn’tlooklikeshehadanythingwrongwithher,butshewastalkingtohim.Maybeshewassoul-sick.“Howoldareyou?”heasked.
“Ooooh,”Willasaidfrombehindhimasifhe’d
saidsomethingwrong.“It’sokay,”Aviana
saidwithabriefsmiletoWilla.“I’mtwenty-eight.”
“Me,too.DopeoplecallyouAna?”
Hersoftlipsturnedupinasmileassheshookherhead.“No.Butyoucanifyouwantto.”
“Iwantto.”Itwasshorter.EasierthanAviana.GrayBacksgavenicknames.Nerd.Griz.Ranger.Beaston.Hewouldgivethisonetoherfortonight.Sheseemednice.Frailandbreakable,butnice.
Anaorderedhimanotherbeerandoneforherself.Shegrimacedwhen
shetookthefirsttaste,though.Shedidn’tlikeit,butsheforceditdownherthroat,sipbyuncomfortablesip.Shetippedthebartenderafivedollarbill.Maybeshecamefrommoney,ormaybeshewasjustthatnice.
“Whereareyoufrom?”Eastonasked.It
wasn’tsmalltalk.Hewasshitatsmalltalk.HejustwantedtoknowmoreaboutawomanwhowouldbravetheGrayBacksandcallhimhandsome.
“RapidCity.Iwasateacherthere.Kindergartners.”
Eastontookalong
drawofhisbeer.Shewassmartthen.Sowhywasshetalkingtohim?“Whyaren’tyouateacheranymore?”
Hercheeksturnedthemostappealingshadeofpink.“Iquitforaman.”
Hisbearsnarledinsideandscratchedtauntinglybeneathhisskin.
“Whywouldyoudothat?”“Becauseheaskedme
to,andIdidn’tunderstandthatIcouldsaynoatthetime.Ithoughthewasitforme.”
“Yourmate?”Shecouldn’tmeethis
eyesanymore.Shenoddedherchinonce.“Iguessyou
couldcallhimthat.”Eastonwantedtokill
everything.“Whyaren’tyouwithhimnow?”
“BecauseIdidn’twanttobewithamanwhoaskedmetoquitsomethingIloved.”
Prideblastedthroughhischest,andhesmiledashe
tookanotherdrinkofhisbeer.“Good.”Notsofrail.Notsofragile.
Thesoftsoundofgigglingbrushedhissensitiveears,andheturnedtowherehisrowdycrewhadmovedoffdownthebar.WillaandGeorgiabothgavehimthumbsupandbig,confusing
smiles,andwhenhelookedforGia—becauseshewaspregnantandhelikedherclosesohecouldhelpCreedprotecther—shewaswaddlingdouble-time,roundbellyleadingtheway,towardthejukeboxinthecorner.Henarrowedhiseyessuspiciously.
“ImetWillaandtheothersinthebathroom,”Anasaidsoftly,followinghisgaze.“Theyseemnice.”
“Thenwhyareyousoafraidofus?”
Thatparthecouldn’tfigureout.Ifshewasashiftergroupie,she’dbemorebrazen.Instead,shewas
clutchingherdrinkandsittingattheoppositeedgeofherbarstool.
“Becauseyou’reabearshifter.”
“Andyou’rescaredofshifters?”
Shenodded.Hestaredatherfora
longtime.Shewasbeautiful,
smart,andshy,andobviouslyterrifiedtobethisclosetohim,sowhywasshetalkingtohiminthefirstplace?
“Isthissomesortofdareorbet?”heasked,scanningtheroom.KongliftedhisbeerinthecornerfromatablehesatatwithhisLowlanderCrew,butother
thanthat,noonewaswatchingthemthathecouldtell.“Areyourfriendstakingpicturesorsomething?Idon’tdosocialmedia,andI’mrarelyontheInternet,sothatshitwon’thurtme.”
“I’dneverhurtyou,”shesaidonarushedbreath.
Hejerkedhisgaze
backtoher.Truth.Everywordshe’djustutteredhadbeenlacedwithhonesty.Whothefuckwasthisgirl?Andwhywasn’thisbearasnarlingmessinsideofhimlikehewaseveryotherminuteofhislife?Hesetthebeerbottledownandbackedoffthestool.“Whywould
youwanttotalktome?Anddon’tgivemethehandsomeline.IknowwhatIam,andIknowwhatIain’t.Mixedup,bloodlettingberserkeratthemercyofmyalpha’spatience.Butyou’retoogoodtobesittingnexttosomecrazylumberjackgrizzlyshifter.”
Anawasclutchingher
pursenow,andassheslidoffherchair,shelookedlikeshewasgoingtocry.Humanwomenarelikethat.Softandfulloftears.Shewaslittleandhelpless,likeheusedtobe,andnowhisprotectiveinstinctswerekickinginforawomanhecouldn’taffordtogetattachedto.
Shewasn’taGrayBack.WouldneverbeaGrayBackbecausealltheboysweremated.Exceptyou.
Eastontookastepback.Hisbearhadtherightofit—afraidandquietaroundthisdangerouslittlecreature.
EastonspuntoescapeSammy’sBar—toescapeAna
—butWillastoodinhisway,apissedofflittlehellion.Sheblastedherfistsonherhips.“Askhertodance.”
“What?No.”Willa’susuallyhappy
browneyesnarrowedtodangerouslittleslits.“Yes,she’ssoft,Easton,yetsomehow,shefoundthe
couragetocomeoverhereandtalktoyourscaryass.Ilikeher.Ifyouhurtherfeelings,I’llbreakyourfuckingleg.”
Hemadeanangryclickingsoundbehindhisteeth.“Youalreadybrokemyleg.”Andhehadthepermanentlimptoproveit.
Willa’seyebrowswrenchedupward.“Youhavetwolegs.Icanplaythatgametwice.”
Hegrowledatherandturnedaround.“Doyouwanttodance?”hemutteredtoAna,hiswordsgravelly.
Ana’sprettyblueeyeshadsomehowgotteneven
bigger.Theytookstockofhalfherfuckingadorablefacenow.“Ithinkso?”
“Great.”Eastongrabbedherhandandtriednottocrushherfingersandbreakallherbonesasheledhertotheemptydancefloor.
ThiswasthepartwhereCreed,Matt,andJason
usuallyfoughttheirmates.Emptydancefloorswithonecoupledrewtoomuchattention,butEastongaveexactlyzerofuckswhowatchedhim.Beastonwashisnameandtowncrazywashisgame,andhe’dacceptedthestaresalongtimeago.
Giahadpickedaslow
song,andwithafrustratedsnarlinhisthroat,heturnedaroundandpulledAna’shandtohisshoulder,thenheldherotheroneouttohissideandswayedbackandforth.
Anawasholdingherbreathandhadgonepaleasasheet.Andnowhewantedtokillwhateverwasupsetting
her,butunfortunately,theonlydangertoherwashim.Hisheadwassomixedup.Heshookithardandtriedtofocusonnottouchinghertoohard.Shewouldturntoashesandblowawayinastiffwindifhedid.
“Breathe,”hedemanded.
Sheinhaleddeeplyasatrembleshookhershoulders.
“I’mnotgoingtohurtyou.Iwon’t,soyoudon’thavetobescared.”
Herhandswereminiatureagainsthis,andforthefirsttimewhenhestraightenedtohisfullheight,
hegotthechancetoseehowtinyshewasnexttohim.Itwasalmostlaughable.Hehadafootonherandahundredpoundsofmuscle,atleast.Shesqueezedhishand,andhedrewupshort.Wait,hewastouchingher.
“What’swrong?”sheaskedlow,hereyessobig
andvulnerable.Shegaveawayeveryemotionwiththem.
He’dstoppeddancing,sohepickeditupagain.SidetosideasheheldAnaasgentlyasadriedsanddollar.
Sheclearedherthroatandlookedaround.Everyonewasstaring,buthedidn’t
care.Ana,however,seemedtowitherundertheattention.“Youdanceverywell,”shewhispered.
“Doesthatsurpriseyou?”
“Yes.Ithoughtamanlikeyouwouldsteponmytoesandlosehisrhythm,butyou’requitegood.”
Hisfacestretchedintoaquicksmile,thereandgoneathercompliment.Handsomeandagooddancer,andAnatheMysterywasgivinghimallthecomplimentsamanlikehimneverthoughthe’dhear.Hewouldrewardherkindnesswithanexplanation.
“Mymomtaughtme
todance.”Surpriseflittedacross
herface,andherfulllipsmoldedintoasmilethatstolehisbreathfromhischest.“Ididn’tknowthat.”
Whatastrangethingtosay.Ofcourseshedidn’tknowthat.Shedidn’tknowhim.
“Iwasseven.Shetaughtmeinourlivingroomandtoldme,“Tomakeafinemansomeday,youneedtolearntodancewithawoman.”Toholdherproperandgentle,asarealmanought.ThatparthadbeenmeantforDad,whosatatthetableandglaredattheir
lesson.Momlovedtodancetoanoldrecordplayerinthelivingroom.DadneverhaddancedwithMomthatEastonhadseen.
“Shewaslovely.Imean…shesoundslovely.”Ana’sbreathshookharderasshesteppedclosertohimandrestedhercheekaslightasa
paintbrushstrokeagainsthischest.
Shewouldhearitnow.Anawouldhearhowhardhisheartwasbeatingjustbeingthisclosetoher.Heshouldpullaway.Hide.Butwhenhelookedattheexit,Willawasstandinginfrontofitwithherfinger
jammedathim,shakingherhead.Fuck.
AtleastAnahadn’taskedwhathappenedtoMom.Helikedthetinyhumanmoreforit.Shewasn’tdiggingtoodeepashe’dseentheothershiftergroupiestrytodowhentheBoarlanderswereatSammy’s
tryingtogettheirdicksstroked.Somanyquestions.Anadidn’tdothat,though.Anawasniceandgentle.
Whywashisbearstillsoquiet?
“Wheredidyoulearntodance?”heasked,justtodistractherfromhisheartbeatbatteringherfacerightnow.
“Notfrommyparents.WhenwemovedtoRapidCity,Iwenttopublicschoolforthefirsttime.Therewasthisschooldance,andIwassonervous.I’dbeenhomeschooledallmylife,andthereweresomanykidsitwasintimidating.”Hervoiceshookoneveryword,butit
wasgettingstronger.“Aboyinmyclassaskedmetodance.Itwasverystiffandscary,butheshowedmewhattodo.AndafterwardIfeltaccomplishedandbrave.”
Hedidn’tlikethinkingaboutherdancingwithanyoneelse.Whichwasstupidandterritorial,andhe
hadnorighttogetpossessiveoverher.Anawasn’this.Still,herestedhischinonherheadsoshewouldn’tseehimcurluphislipinasnarlfortheboywhohadaskedhertodance.
Somethingstrangewashappening.Anastoppedshaking,andshewentall
warmandsoftinhisarms.Shesteppedevencloser,pressingherbodyflushagainsthis.Vanilla.Herhairwassilkagainsttheraspofhisbeard.Suchacontrasttohim.GoodAna.BadBeaston.Anothersongcameon.Anotherslowone.Giawascontrollingthejukeboxnow
andthrewamiddlefingeratoneofKong’slowlandersforcomplaining.WasWillacrying?No,couldn’tbe.Justatrickofthelightsplayingwithhiseyes.Anafeltsogoodagainsthim,butnowthatshewassoclose,she’dfeelhowexcitedhewas.Howcouldshenot?Hisdickwas
hardasarockbetweenthem.“Ihaveaboner.”
Perfect.Thatwouldsetthemood.Idiot.
“Forme?”Anaasked.Wasthathopeinhervoice?Shelookedupwiththoseensnaringeyes.
Goddamn,shefeltgoodpressedupagainsthis
dicklikethis.“Thatwassupposedtoscareyouaway.”
“Itdoesn’t.Ilikethatyousaywhatyoumean.”
Helikedthatabouther,too.Honestnotesinallherwordsandshit,shefeltgood.Good,good,good.Ana,hisAna.Hewantedherunderhim,ontopofhim.
Fuck.“Ihavetogo,”he
murmured.Adeepfrownhurthisface.Hedidn’twanttoleaveher,butshewasasfragileasadryleaf,andhewasn’tthebeastforher.Quietbear,whereareyou?Thelightsweretoobrightinhere.
“Okay,”shesaid,disappointmentpoolinginherbig,blueeyes.
Hisgutshurt.He’ddonethat,disappointedher,butitwasbestthisway,leavingnow.Hewouldonlydisappointhermoreifsheknewhowfuckeduphereallywas.
Bowing,hekissedherhandlikemomhadtaughthim,thenhestrodeforthedoorandpastWillawhosesadeyesmatchedAna’s.
Don’tlookback.Heblastedthroughthe
doorandoutintothedusty,gravelparkinglot.
Heturnedandglared
atthedoorasitswungclosedbehindhim.Alonggrowlrattledhischest,andtherehewas—thebeastinhismiddle.
EverystepEastontookawayfromthebarhurt,butheforcedhimselftowalktoJason’struckanddroppedthetailgate.Hesatonitandlookedatthestars.Ifhewas
lucky,theotherswouldbeheadedoutherenowtogobacktotheGraylandMobileParkwithhim.
“DidImakeyouangry?”Anaaskedfrombehindhim.
Eastonjumped.Shit,howhadshesnuckuponhim?
Shewasshakingagain,badly.Thismadenodamnedsense.Anawasobviouslyterrifiedaroundhim,yetshekeptapproachinghim.
“Youmakemefeellikeamonster.”Ithadbeenmeanttohurther,andhiswordsdid.Thatmuchwas
obviousbyherfacefalling.Moreguttinghim,moreache.Sheshouldn’thavethiskindofpoweroverhim.Nooneshould.Shewasgoingtodrawouthisbear.
But…hisinnergrizzlyhadstoppedsnarlingagain.
“You’renotamonster,”Anasaidlowas
shesteppedcarefullyoverapotholeinthegravel.“Andifyoueversaythataroundmeagain,Iwon’ttalktoyouanymore.”Asthebravelittlehumandraggedhergazebacktohis,shelookedangry.Smelledangry.Vanillaandfury.“You’regood.”
“I’mnot.”
Sheeasedcloserandrestedherhandslightasfeathersonhisknees.“Youare.”Hertonehadturnedtogritandsteel.
Eastonfrozeunderhertouch.Anawasfragile,andhewouldhurtherifhemoved.Settlinginbetweenhislegs,shecuppedhisface
gentlywithherpalms.Shesearchedhiseyesandsmiled.“Ilikeddancingwithyou.Andwhenwetalk,Igetbutterfliesinmystomach.”
“Imakeyousick?”“No,”shesaid
throughalaugh.Helikedthesound.Softandfeminine,hergiggletinkledlikeabell.“I
mean,youmakemehavefluttersinmystomachbecauseIlikethewayyoumakemefeel.”
“You’repretty.”Heclearedhisthroatandswallowedhard.Hecoulddothatpartbetter.“Ithinkyou’retheprettiestgirlI’veeverseen.”There.Better.
Thatfeltright.Shesmiledagainand
strokedherthumbsacrosshischeeks.“Ialwayswonderedwhatitwouldbeliketohaveyousaythattome.”
Eastongrippedherwristsandshookhishead,confused.“Idon’tunderstandyou.”
Anastoodonhertiptoesandrubbedhercheeksoftlyagainsthis.Silkagainsttheraspofhisscruff.Moreproofofhowdifferenttheywere.Hewasajaggedriverrock,andshewasthegentlewater.
NowitwasAnawhowassteadyasEaston’sheart
racedandhisbreathshook.Shewassoclose,sowarm,touchinghim.Him.Hewasn’tastupidman,andheknewhewouldneverseeAnaagain,butfortonight,forrightnow,hewasgoingtoenjoyawomanpretendinghewassomethingmorethanamonster.
Hisbreathcameinshallowpantsnowasthecornerofherlipsbrushedhis.Closinghiseyes,hethreadedhisfingersthroughhersofthairandgrippedgently.Don’tgo.Thenexttimesheeasedbacktobrushhercheekagainsthis,hepressedhislipstohersasgentlyasadelicate
womanlikeAnadeserved.Hisbearpushedformore—harder,faster.Tasteher!ButEastonforcedhishandsandlipstobeeasy.Eastonhadtoldherhewouldn’thurther,andhewouldn’t.Notnow,notever.
Hestifledtheurgentgrowlinhisthroatsohe
wouldn’tscareher.Anaangledherfaceandsuckedgentlyonhislips.Fuck,hewantedmore.Neededit.Henippedsoftlyathermouth,grazingherwithhisteeth,andsheletoffaquietmoanthatdiddisastrousthingstohismiddle.Burning,fire,dicksohard.
Hejustwantedataste.Asmallone.Justone.
Asherlipsmovedagainsthis,hetouchedtheclosedseamofhermouthwithhistongue.Arequest,notademand,becauseAnawasgood,andsheshouldmakethedecisionwhethertoletabeastlikehimin.
Herlipsparted,andhebrushedhistongueagainsthers.Fuck,hewasbeingtooroughwithherhair.Hedroppedhishandsdowntoherwaistanddraggedhercloser,pressedheragainsthiserectionbecauseshefeltrightandwarmbetweenhislegs.
Hekissedherharder.
Nothisfault—hisbear’sfault.Theanimalwasinhishead,pushingtobeclosertoAnanow.Sheslidherarmsoverhisshouldersandtightenedaroundhisneck,pullinghimnearer.Don’thurther,Bear.Begentle.Fragile,delicateAna.Hewasanavalanche,andshewasa
hummingbird.Courageouslittlecreature.Sexy.
Sherolledherhipsagainsthis,andhegrittedhisteeth,pullingawayfromtheirkissasherestedhisforeheadagainsthers.“Ana,”hewarnedhershakily.Shewasundoinghim.
“Ilikewhenyoucall
methat.”Shehesitated,thenkissedhimoncemore,asoftpeckthatpluckedathislips.Withasmile,shebackedaway.“Yourcrewiswaitingtoleave.”
Eastondraggedhisgazeawayfromherandoverhisshoulder.TheGrayBackswerecomingoutofthebar.
Anaheadedtowardawhitecar.Don’tgo.Sheunlockedit,thenslidinbehindthewheel.Whentheengineroaredtolife,sherolleddownthewindow.Goodbye,Easton.Heknewitwascoming.Thewordsthatwouldriphisinsidesout.
“I’llseeyou
tomorrow,Easton,”shesaidwithashysmileandpinkcheeks.
Stunned,hestoodfromthetailgateandwatchedherdriveaway.
Anahadmadehimfeelalmostnormaltonight,butthatwasn’ttheonlygiftshe’dgivenhim.
She’dgivenhimhisfirstkiss.
ChapterSeven
Eastonsatontheback
porchofhistrailerandwatchedtheprogressofthesunasitsankdownbehindthemountains.Hefingeredthestrandoffrayed,black
silkribbonhe’dtakenfromtheraven’streasureboxthismorningbeforeworkonthelanding.ThedayhadbeenhardashisfocushaddriftedthiswayandthatbetweenthoughtsofAnaandthemeaningoftheblackribbonthathe’dtuckeddeepinsidehispocket.
Itservedasareminder.AnawasfraillikeMomhadbeen.Shewouldn’tsurviveamanlikehim,soitwasbestthatherwords,“I’llseeyoutomorrow,Easton,”hadbeennothingmorethanaprettylie.Shedidn’tevenknowwherehelived.
Hepulledthelength
ofribbonthroughhisfingers.Araven’ssympathy.
“Wherehashegoneoffto?”Momasked,handsonherhipsasshesquintedagainstthesettingsunthatthrewthefrontyardintothegoldsandorangesofautumn.
Eastonhadjusthithisfirstgrizzlygrowthspurtand
wasalmostastallashishumanmothernow.Heshruggedandpressedhishandagainstherbellywheretheundulatingwasthestrongest.Itwasaboy,alittlebrother.Hejustknewit.“Maybehefellasleepsomewhere.”
Mominhaleddeeply.
Shewastiredlatelyandhadtroublemovingaround.Herfeetswelledatnight,andshewasshortofbreath,butDaddidn’tlethereaseuponthechores.Notthisclosetowinter.
“Nextyear,canIgotoschoolwithotherkids?”heasked.Hewouldn’tdare
mentionittoDad.Healreadyknewthatanswer.
Dadwouldsay,“Boy,youknowwhatyouare?Yougottabearinsideofyou,andhumanscan’tbetrustedwiththatkindofinformation.Westayouthereinthewoodsforsurvival.Getthatcockamamiedideaoutof
yourhead.School.”Andthenhe’dspitinthegrassbecausehealwaysdidthatwhenEastonaskedadumbquestion.Hespatonthegroundthesameasheusedaperiodattheendofasentence.Discussionclosed.
Momwassofter,though.Sheunderstoodhow
lonelyitwasouthere.Shesmiledsadlydown
athimandsqueezedhisshoulder.“Thingsweregoingtobedifferent,Easton.Ihadplansforyouandme,butthebabyderailedthem.Maybesomeday,butnotnow.”
Plans?Troubled,Eastonlookedoutoverthe
yardagainashissensespickedupsomethingthatliftedthefinehairsonthebackofhisneck.Somethingwaswrongintheirwoods.
“Dad?”hecalled,steppingofftheporch.
Movementstirredthedrygrassinthebrushjustbehindthetreeline.
Eastontrottedforwardatthesoundofapainedgroan,andMomfollowedasshewasable.
Dadappearedfrombehindthetrees,stumblingandslow.Eastoncouldn’tunderstandwhathewasseeing,though.Dad’sheadwascrookedonhisshoulders.
“Oh,myGod,”Momwhisperedinhorror.“Easton,don’tlook.”ShecoveredEaston’sfacewithherhandsandyankedhimtoastop.“Isaiddon’tlook!”Momwassobbingnow.“Gobackintothehouse!”shescreamedassheranforDad.
Dadfelltohisknees,
bodyconvulsingashetoppledoversideways.
Eastonapproachedslowly,horrifiedasMomcriedoverhim.Hisneckhadbeensnapped.No.
“Russ,”Momcried.“WhatdoIdo?CanIresetit?”
“No,”Dadwheezed.
“Idon’tunderstand.Idon’tunderstand!Howdidthishappen?No.It’llbeokay.I’llfixit.Eastongetbackinthehouse!Don’tlook!”
MaybeDadhadfallenoutofatreeoroveraravine.Hisshifterhealinghadworked,butfrozehisbroken
neckatthewrongangle.Someinjuriesweretoobadforevenshifterstosurvive.Allhislife,Dadhadtaughthimnottogetcarelesswithhishealing.EastonheavedbreathasMomweptandpositionedherselfabovehisbody.Shewasgoingtore-breakhisneck.
“Mom,”Eastonsaid,voicethick.Heshookhishead.“Itwon’twork.”
“Mae,”Dadchokedout.
“WhatisitRuss.Whatisit?”
“Mae…I’msorry.”Alonglastbreathescapedhislips,andhiseyesrolled
closed.“No!”Mom
screamed.ShepulledhardonDad’shead,butbreakinganeckwasn’tsoeasy.Notforweakhumans.“Don’tleavemehere!Don’tleaveme!”
Mom’sagonytoreathisownburningheart.Dad.Eastondroppedtohisknees
inshockathowbrokenhelooked.Howgrotesquehelookedindeathwithhisbulgingneck.He’dcomebacktosaygoodbye.TearsstreameddownhisfaceasheburiedhisheadagainstDad’sstomach.Hewasstillwarmandsmelledoflife.“Dad,”hemurmured,
grippinghisclothesanddampeninghisshirtwithtears.
Theravenflutteredandflappedinthebranchesabove,buthecouldn’tpullhimselfawayfromDad’sbody.Heandmomsatlikethatforalongtime,cryingagainsthimuntilhegrew
coldandstiff.Eastonhadnever
heardsomeonebreakbefore,butheknewwhateverwashappeningtoMomwasawful.
Momshookhisbody.“Iwasgoingtotakehimandleave,andyouwouldn’tletme!Hecancontrolhisbearnow.Wecould’vemadeit!
Andyourippedthatawayfromme.Andnowyou’veleftme?You’veleftushereinthishellyoucreated?Youcan’t.”Sheclenchedhisshirtinherfists.“Youcan’t,Russel.Doyouhearme?Eastonwillbeallalone!”
Allalone?Somanytears.Mom’s
faceleakedonandon,longafterEastonhadrundry.Heeasedaway,layagainstafelledtreeandwatchedMomcry.Theeveningshadowshadturnedtodarknessasthesunsankbehindthemountains.Thelightfromthecabinwastheonlythingthatlittheclearing.Noteventhemoon
wasfullenoughtolendthemadequatelight.Momstoodup,mutteringstringsofwordsthatdidn’tmakeanysenseatall.Theymeantnothing.Maybetheyweren’tevenwordsatall.
Momdidn’tseehimanymoreasshestoodandbegangatheringwood.Her
eyeshadgoneempty,andhertearshaddriedonhercheeks.Shecouldn’tseeaswellinthedarkashim,yetshefoundwoodasthoughshehadtheforestmemorized.
Silently,hehelpedher.Hewassmallyet,onlyeight,butMomwaspregnantandheartbroken,and
whatevershewasdoingrightnow,hecouldlightenherload.Alongsideher,hedraggedwoodintotheclearinginfrontoftheircabinuntiltheearlyhoursofthemorning.Shedidn’tanswerhimwhenheaskedquestions,sohegaveuptrying.
Andwhenthefirststreaksofpinkbrushedthehorizon,MomaskedhimtohelpherdragDad’sbodytothepileofwood.Andthenshelitamatchandwatchedhimburn.
EastonburiedhisfaceagainstMom’ssideandclutchedherdirtydress,
unabletowatchthefireconsumehisdad.“Why?”heasked.
Mominhaleddeeplyandasked,“Easton?”asifshe’donlyjustnoticedhimclutchingontoher.
“Whyareweburninghim?”
“Because,myboy.
Yourdaddywouldhauntthesewoodsforalways.YouandIseetheghosts,Easton.We’llburnhisbelongingsandputsaltaroundthehousenext.That’swhatyoudo,Easton.Canyourememberthat?”
“Yes,ma’am,”hesaidonachokedbreath.He
couldsmellDadburning.“Repeatitforme.”“Burnthebones,burn
thebelongings,salt.”“That’sagoodboy.”
Hervoicesoundedstrange—dreamy—asshewatchedtheflames.“You’llneedtodothesamethingformybody.”
“Don’tsaythat.”
“Promiseme,Easton.Don’tletmehauntyou.”
Andthat’swhenhefeltit.
Mom’sbellywaspulleduptightlikeadrum.
Eastongrittedhisteethagainstthepaininhismiddle.Hecouldstillsmellthesmokefromthefuneral
pyre.Theribbonhaddonethat.Theraven’strinketsheldmagicinthem.She’dleftitonthewindowsillforhimtofindwhenhe’dgonebacktothehousewithMom.Itwastheraven’swayoftellinghimshewassorryforhisloss,thoughhowayoungcrowunderstoodsomuchwas
beyondhim.Maybeshe’dbeenhis
spiritanimal.Ifhehadn’theldher
giftinhishandnow,hecould’veconvincedhimselfshehadn’texistedatall.
ChapterEight
Maybethiswaswhat
apanicattackfeltlike.Avianagrippedthewheelandtriedtostoppanting.Keepitup,andshewasgoingtopassout.
Shit,shecouldn’tdothis.
ShethoughtofEaston’skisslastnightandshookherheadtorattleouttheweakthoughts.Yes,shecould,becauseEastonhadbeengentlewithher.Hewasn’tallweaponsanddarkness.Hewasgoodinhis
middle,justlikehealwayshadbeen.
Lastnight,she’dseenthesparkoftheboyshe’dfalleninlovewith.
Eastonwashers.Bythetimeshepulled
undertheGraylandMobileParksign,however,shewasbacktofull-blownpanic-
mode.Today,shewasgoingtoputherselfouttherefurtherthansheeverhadinherentirelife.Shewasgoingtodeclarewhatsheneededtomakeherlifeintotheoneshewanted.
Unfortunately,thatlifehadsomehowgrowntoincludeacrewofbearshifters—herbiggestnaturalfear.
Fromearlychildhood,she’dbeentoldhowvolatileandmurderoustheapexpredatorshifterswere.Theyweren’tlikeherpeople,whowerescavengershifters,politelypreyingonalreadydeceasedthings.Bearskilledwhattheywantedanddidn’tgivesecondthoughtstocarcasses.
Greatriskbroughtthepossibilityofgreatreward,though,andEastonwasworthit.Hereallywas.Deepbreath.Chestout,backstraight.Smile.Bigger.Let’sdothis.
TheGrayBackssataroundacommunalfirepitinfrontofasemi-circleof
trailers.TheyworelightjacketstowardoffthecoolMarchnightandsatinbrightly-coloredplasticchairs.Eastonwasn’there.Well,good.Thiswouldbeeasierwithouthimwatchingbecauseshewasn’theretoseeEastonrightnow.Shewasheretotalktohisalpha,
Creed.TheGrayBackshad
gonequietbythetimeshestumbledoutofhercar.“Hi!”shesaid,muchmorehighpitchedthanshe’dintendedassheflappedherhandinawave.
“Ha!Payup,Griz,”Willasaid,pointingtoMatt.
MattrolledhiseyesandhandedWillaawaddedupfivedollarbillfromhispocket.
Okaay.Ayippingattackdog
thesizeofasoccerballchargedAvianaandbouncedaroundherfeet,barking.Itwasbrownandwhite,and
someonehasshavedamohawkdowntheentirelengthofhisbackandhead.Shewould’vebeenmoreintimidatedifhedidn’tlickheranklesbetweenbarks.
“PeanutButterSpike.Getdown!”Giacommanded.
Avianasteppedgingerlyaroundtheyapper
andopenedthebackdoor,thenstruggledundertheweightofamassiveboxofbeercans.SheheftedittowardtheGrayBacks,breathingheavilyasshestumbledforward,tryingnottosteponthetinydogcirclingherfeet.Shesetthegiftontheledgeofthebrick
firepit.“Ididresearchonlumberjacks,andtheInternetsaidyouwerehairy,woreflannel,belchedalot,anddranklotsofbeer.”
Willagrabbedherstomachandcackled.“Whatsitewereyoulookingon?”
“Thefirstonethatcameupontheresults.”
GoodGod,shewishedshecouldlifthergazefromthegroundrightnow.“Anyway,Ibroughtyouthis.”Shepushedtheboxforward,butitonlymovedbyaninch.Silly,weakbirdarms.PeanutButterSpikeprobablycould’vemoveditmore.
“Ilikeher,”Jason
said,rippingintothesideandpullingabluecanout.
“Howdidyoufindoutwherewelive?”Creedasked,hiseyesnarrowedinsuspicion.
“Oh.Uuuh,itsaiditonJason’ssocialmediapages.”Hadit?Shecouldn’tremember.She’dknownthey
livedherebecausesheflewoveriteveryday,buttheydidn’tneedtoknowthatshewasaquietobservertotheirlives.
“Dude,”Mattsaid,levelingJasonwithaglare.
“Likeyoucantalk!Youwerethekingofoversharingbeforeyou
deletedallyourpages.Pissoff,man.It’snotlikeIeverthoughtanyonewouldbeabletoactuallyfindthetrailerpark.We’reoutinthewilderness.IassumedGPSwouldlaughatanyonewhotriedtogetupthebackroadsinthesemountains.”
Creedwasglaringat
himwithatired,notamusedexpression.
Jasonshrugged.“Fine.I’lltakeanymentionofouraddressoffmypages.”
CreedswunghisattentiontoAviana,whowasfeelingmightyguiltyforoutingJasontosaveherselfrightaboutnow.“Whatare
youdoinghere?”Avianaliftedherchin
andtriedtoholdhisgaze,butfailed.Fuckitall,justspititoutthen.“I’mheretoaskyouforEaston.”
Jasonchokedonhisbeerandspeweditintoafinemistintheair.
“Whatdoyoumean,
askforEaston?”Creedaskedoverthecoughing.
Sheinhaleddeeplyandsaid,“I’mheretoaskyourpermissiontocourtEaston.”
“Explain.”Avianaheldontothe
sideofthewaist-high,bricked-infirepittosteady
herwobblylegsandswallowedhard.“Iwanttodatehimwiththeintentionofbecominghismate.”
“That’snothowwedothingshere.Matesarechosenfreely.”Creedlookedherupanddownashisnostrilsflared.“Yousmellliketerror.IknowEaston.I
don’tthinkyouareitforhim.Heisn’tmadeforamate.I’msorry,buttheanswerisno.”
“Aw,pissoff,Creed,”Willamuttered.Shepitchedhervoiceupandyelled,“Beaston!”
“Willa,”Creedwarned.
“AsSecond,Iveto
yourbullshittery.Shelikeshim,shebroughtusbeer,andshewonmefivefuckin’dollars.”Willacockedherheadandhereyebrowsjackedup.“Winner,winner,werebeardinner.”
“Second,Willa.Second.Notalpha.I’malpha,andIsaysheisn’tgoingtobe
safearoundEaston.I’mallforEastonfindingsomeone,butshe’shuman,andhe’s…well…Beaston.”
“Hehasn’tkilledGiayet,”Willaargued,pointingtoCreed’smate.
CreedlookedatGiaindisbelief.“I’mnotthebadguyinthis.I’mtryingtosave
herlife.”“Hewon’thurtme,”
Avianamurmured.Shewouldignorethesliceunderherarmthatwasjustnowscabbingover.
“Baby,”GiasaidrubbingCreed’sarm.“Iknowyoumeanwell,butAvianaisaskingyourpermissionto
courthimoutofrespect.It’snotreallyuptoyou.”Shenoddedtothemanlimpingtowardthemfromthetreeline.“It’suptohim.”
Creedscrubbedhishandsdownhisfaceandmuttered,“Fuck.”
Asheapproached,Easton’seyesreflectedeerily
intheglowfromthefireinthebrickpit—proofthathisanimalwasneverfarfromthesurface.Hisgrayshirtclungtohishardphysique,andthetoptwobuttonswereopen,exposingthelinebetweenhispecmuscles.Hislegswerelongandpowerfulwitheverystridehetook,anddespitethe
limp,hewasgraceful.He’dlearnedthatgatewithhistimeinthewilderness,fendingforhimself.She’dwatchedtheslowchangefromclumsyboytogracefulanimalintheyearsthatbrokehim.
“Hi,”shewhisperedpasthertighteningvocalcords.
Heshiftedhisweightfromfoottofoot,justontheedgeofthefirelight.Eveninhishumanform,helookedlikeawildanimalwhofoundsafetyintheshadows.“You’rehere.”
“Forareason,”Willasaid.
Eastonfrownedand
ghostedaglanceatthered-headedwoman,thenbacktoAviana.“Why?”
AvianalookedtoCreed.Hewaskinghere,andshewaswaryofhimsnappingifshedidn’tbehaveright.
“Goahead,”thealphasaidinadefeatedtone,
leaningbackinhischairandrestinghishandontheswellofhismate’sstomach.
“Iwanttocourtyou.”Eastonshruggeda
shoulderuptohisearandshookhishead.“Idon’tknowwhatthatmeans.”
“Iwanttodateyou,andifyoufindyoulikeme
wellenough…”Sheswallowedthelumpinherthroat,buttherestofthewordswouldn’tcomeout.Notwithhimstaringathersodirectlylikethis.
“IfIlikeyouwellenough…what?”
“Maybedon’tlookatmewhileItellyou.”
“Allright,”hesaid,soundingbaffled.Heturnedaroundandgaveherhisback.
Sheexhaledalong,shakybreath.“Maybeifyoulikemewellenough,you’llpickmeforamate.”
Easton’sbackwentrigid.Witheachsilentsecondthatdraggedon,the
anticipationcloggedherthroat,makingitharderandhardertobreathe.Sheopenedhermouthtoapologizeforintrudingandexcuseherself,butEastonmurmured,“You’rescaredofme.”
“I’llworkonnotbeingscaredofyou.”
“Thenokay.”
“Okay?”Hervoicecameoutahopefulsqueak.
“Easton,IforbidyoutoTurnher,”Creedsaid,powerfulvoicesendingelectriccurrentsintotheair.
EastonlookedtoWillaoverhisshoulderandshookhishead.“Ilearnedmylesson.Iwon’tTurnAna.”
HespunslowlyonhisheelandlookedatAvianaoverthefirelight.“Iwon’tbeanygoodatthis.”Therewaswarninginhistone,buthiseyessoftened.“Butwecantry.Alpha,Iwantyourblessing.”Heturnedhisinhuman,greengazeonCreed.“Please.”
AmuscletwitchedinCreed’sclenchedjaw.Withasigh,heleveledAvianawithaglare.“BeforeyouanswerthequestionI’mabouttoaskyou,knowthatwecanallhearalie.”
Steelingherself,Aviananodded.
“Whydoyouwantto
bewithEaston?”Thatquestionheldthe
easiestanswerintheworld.“BecauseIdon’tfitanywhereelse.”
Softly,Willamurmured,“ShesoundslikeaGrayBacktome.”
AslowsmilespreadacrossCreed’sfaceinthe
flickeringfirelight.“ThenacourtshipbetweenyouandEastonhasmyblessing.”
Agigglebubbledupherthroat,andshesaggedheavilyagainstthebrickasEastonstoodfrozenacrossthefire,lookingstunned.Willastoodandreachedherfirst,thenhuggedhersohard
herlungshurt.GiaandGeorgiafollowed,andtheboyssmiledandnoddedatherasshewalkedaroundthefirepittowardEaston—herEaston.
“Iwon’thurtyou,”hesaid,promiseinhisvoice.
Shestoodonhertiptoesandhuggedhisneck,
inhalingthewildscentofhisskin.Furandearthandpine.“Iknowyouwon’t.Itrustyou.”
Hishandsslippedaroundherwaistslowly,gently,asifhewereforcinghimselftobecarefulwithher.“Whenyougettoknowme,you’llleave.”
Sheeasedbackandsmiledupathim,tryingherbesttoholdhisferalgaze.Shepressedherpalmagainsthischest.Herhandrattledwiththesoftvibrationofhispoundingheart.“Ialreadyknowyou.”
Confusionrippledoverhisfacelikeawave,
thereandgoneinamoment.“Doyouwanttoseemyden?”
“Iwanttoseeyourden,”Jasonpipedup.
“No,”Eastongrittedout.
“Howdoyoulikethat?”heaskedGeorgia.“I’mhisbestfriend,andhestill
won’tletmeseetheinsideofhistrailer.”
“Nobody’sseenit,”Mattsaid.“Hey!”hecalledasAvianaandEastonwalkedtowardthetreeline.“I’llgiveyoufivebuckstotelluswhatitlookslikeinside.”
Avianashookherheadandignoredthebanter
thatkickedupnearthefirepit.“Don’tworry,”shesaidsoftly.“Iwon’ttellanyoneanythingyoudon’twantmeto.”
Eastondidn’tsayanythingback,onlyslippedhisbig,strong,callousedhandaroundhersandsqueezedgently.Thatwasa
rewardinitself,soshebumpedhisshoulderandsnuggledhercheekagainsthistautarm.Asignofdevotionfromaraven,buthedidn’tneedtoknowaboutheranimalside.Notyet.Notuntilshefiguredoutawaytobreakittohimgently.Eastonrefusingtosharehishome
withhiscrewwasproofhewasakeeperofsecrets.Herinstinctssaidhewouldbeupsetifheknewshe’dwitnessedtheyearsthathadshatteredhim.No,beforesheexposedherhiddenfeatheredself,shehadtomakesurehewouldn’trunawayfromwhattheycouldbe.
Bythetimethey’dwalkedupthetrailtohissinglewide—theonewiththechippedwhitesidingandstacksoffirewooddownonewholeside—shewasn’tshakingsobadlyanymore.Shedid,however,feelasifshe’dbeendumpedintoasurrealmomentthatcould
verywellbeadream.Shewashere,withhim.Withtheoneshe’dthoughtsomuchaboutandforsakenherpeoplefor.Withtheonewho’dkepthertrinketsafteralltheseyears.
“I’msorry,”hemurmuredashepushedhisdooropen,thoughshe
couldn’ttellwhathewasapologizingfor.
Shesteppedupthestairsandintohisdenasheflippedthelightswitchon.Thesmellofpinesaphithersensesfirstasshetookinthesmallspaceofthelivingroom.Therewasonlyonelampinthecorner,andhe’d
thrownasquareoforangefabricoverittomutethelight.Thewallswerecoveredfromfloortoceilingwithtreebark.Shegaspedasithitherwhythisplacefeltsofamiliar.Shespunandstuckherheadbackoutthefrontdoor,butshealreadyknewwhatshewouldfind.A
workshopbuiltatasimilardistancefromthetreeEastonhadbuiltahouseinwhenhewasacub.Thisplacewashisversionofthehomehe’dlivedinallthoseyearsago.He’drecreatedtheplacehefeltthesafest.
Awashofmixedemotionsfilledher.Sadness
thatthoseyearshadetchedtheirwaysodeeplyintohisadultlife.Disappointmentthathewasstillholdingontothepast.Pridethathe’dsurvivedatall.Tearsblurredhervisionasshesmiledupathim.Hewaswaiting,darkeyebrowsfurrowedwithworry.
“Iloveit,”shewhisperedthickly.
Thetensionmeltedfromhisshoulders,andhehuffedarelievedsigh.Acrookedsmiletookhislips,almostdeepenoughtoexposeoneofhisdimples,butnotquite.
Heshowedherthe
smallkitchenandsinglebedroom,whichtookuphalfthelengthofthetrailerandwascuriouslynormalafterthetree-likelivingroom.Aqueen-sizebedboastedcrispwhitesheetsunderafoldeddowncomforterthatlookedassoftasacloud.Hisbathroomwasjustastidy—a
habithemust’vepickedupinhisadultyearsbecausetheboysherememberedhadbeenscatteredandhislivingspacecluttered.
Shebrushedherfingersacrosstheplushcomforter,familiarizingherselfwithhisplace.Therewasabookshelfalongthe
wallthreeshelveshighandmadeofoak.Thetopshelfwasfilledwithchildbirthbooks.Shepulledoneoutandlookedquestioninglyathim.
“CreedgotGiawithababy.”Withafrown,hesatonthebedbehindher.“Mymomdidn’tsurviveababy.IwantedtomakesureGia
wouldbeokay.”Aviana’sheart
droppedtothefloor.Ofcoursehewouldbeworriedafterwhathappened.
Easton’smouthtickedashepulledattheedgesofthefrayedblackribbonshe’dgiftedhimthenighthisfatherdied.Sheswallowedthegasp
andfrozeintoplacesoshewouldn’tattracthisattentionbeforeshecouldgettheshockwipedoffherface.Wherehadhepulledthatfrom?
“IlikeGia.IwasmadatCreedforputtingheratrisk,butshelovesherbaby.Shewantsit.Eventhough
Giaishuman,sheisn’tweak.Andherbabygirlisstrong,too.”Heliftedhisgazetohers.“She’llbedragon-blooded,youknow.”
“Dragon-blooded?”Avianaasked,leaningbackagainstthedresser.Thatsoundedterrifying.
“Creedisthe
grandsonofthelastimmortaldragon.Heturnedoutgrizzly,andmaybehisdaughterwill,too.Ormaybenot.Giapromisedtohavethebabyinahospital.Registeredshifterscandothatnow.It’snotlikewhenIwasgrowingup,andwehadtohideouryoung.”
Sheknewallabout
that.Ithadbeenthesameforravenshifters.UntiltheywereoldenoughtocontroltheirChanges,itwassafesttoliveawayfromsociety,offthegridsomewhere.Itwasstilllikethatforgrowingfamilies.Ravensweren’touttothepubliclikeothershiftersandlikelynever
wouldbe.Ravenswerenaturallymorecautiousthanbears.
“I’msorryaboutyourmom.”Hervoicequiveredwithemotion.Oh,howshe’dwantedtosaythosewordstohim,butshe’donlybeenabletobringhimgiftsandhopeheinterpretedhersympathy.
Hepulledtheblackribbonthroughhisfingersandgaveherthatghostofasmile.“Don’tbe.Itwasalongtimeago.Iwasacubatthetime.Ibarelyevenrememberwhatshelookslike.”Hisvoicesoundedoddthough—hollow—andshe’dbetherflightfeathershe
rememberedeverythingingreatdetail.Hismindhadalwaysbeenlikethat.Sharpasablade,retainingeverythinghelearned.It’showhe’dsurvivedoutthereinthoseharshwoodsaloneatsuchayoungage.Hewouldtrysomethinguntilhefiguredouthowitworked,andthen
henevermadethesamemistakestwice.Hismindwasasteeltrap,justliketheone—
AvianaclosedhereyesagainstthevisionofEastonscreaming.Notnow.Later,whenshewasalone.Shecouldn’tfeedthatmemorynowwhilehe
watchedherwiththosebrighteyesthatmissednothing.
“You’rehungry.”Eastonstoodsofastheblurred,andshegaspedathisspeed.
Eastonheldhishandsout.“Sorry,”hewhispered.
“Ithinkyou’rebeinggentlearoundme.”
Henodded.“Isitinyournatureto
begentle?”Heshookhishead
slowly.“ThenIthinkmaybe
youshouldbeyourselfandallowmetoadjust.”
“Butyoualwayssmellscared.Idon’tlikeit.”
“IfIgetusedtoyou,thenIwon’tbesuchachickenanymore,andIhaveafeelingI’lllikeyourrealselfevenbetter,anyway.”
Hiseyebrowsjackedup.“Iassureyou,youwon’t.”
Avianasnortedandlaughed.“Howdoyouknow?”
Hiseyesdippedtoherlipsastheystretchedintoabiggersmile.“BecauseI’mprettydamnedsurenooneonthisplanetcanhandleallofmy…personality.”Butnowasmilewasspreadingacrosshisface,andtheretheywere—thosedimplesshe’dwishedwithallofherhearttosee.
Beforeshecouldchangehermind,shesteppedforwardandpressedherfingeragainstone.She’dseenthemahundredtimesinhisyouthbuthadneverrevealedherselfasahuman,andcouldn’ttouchthetinyindentationsasabird.
Heinhaledasharp
breathashispupilscontractedtopinpointsandzeroedinonher.“Whatareyoudoing?”
“Iliketotouchyou.AndIlikewhenyousmilebigenoughformetoseethese.”Shemovedoutofthewayofadresserandlookedathisreflectioninthemirror
withhim.“Yoursmileismyfavoritethingaboutyou.”
“Areyoubroken,Ana?”
Thequestioncaughtheroffguard,andshehadtowaitamomentbeforeanswering,justtosteadyherthoughts.“Notbroken,no.”
“Thenwhydidyou
askforme?Whydidyoucometomyalphaforme?Whyinthehellwouldyouwanttobematedtoamanlikeme?”
“Becausemylifedoesn’tfeelhollowwhenI’maroundyou,”shesaidhonestly.
Hehuffedahumorless
laughandlookeddownattheribbonbetweenhisfingertips.“Youmakenosense.”
“Iwasn’thappy—”“Happyisjustaword,
Ana.Itdoesn’treallyexist.It’sastateofmindpeopleconvincethemselvestheyhavesotheycangetthroughtheirexistenceonedayata
time.Yousearchforhappiness,andwhenyouthinkyoufindit,youworkyourwholelifetohangontothisfeelingasthinasair,andthenyoudie.Happyisabullshitword.”
Shocked,shesankdowntothebedbesidehim.She’dneverheardhimstring
somanywordstogether.He’dneverbeenvocalabouthisopinionswhenhewasyounger,andnowitwasclearhowjadedhe’dbecome.Hewaswrong,though.
“Wellthen,I’llmakeyouhappyandproveyouwrong.”Shestuckhertongueoutathimandgrinned.
Eastoncockedhisheadandstaredathersmileagain.Itseemedtoattracthisattentioneasily.“Whateveryourreasons,”hemurmured,“I’mgladyoufoundme.”
ChapterNine
Easton’sfocuswas
draggedtoAna’slipsforthehundredthtime.Shesmiledthemorecomfortablearoundhimshebecame.Shedidn’tsmelllikefearanymore.Just
vanilla.Whatwasitabouther
lips?Rightnow,shewassittingbesidehimonthelivingroomcouch,talkingaboutherfirstjob.She’dwaitedtablesatsomedinerwhereshelived,andshehadlotsoffunnystoriesaboutthepeopleshe’dworkedwith.
Herlipslookedlikeartastheyformedeachword.
Ormaybeitwasthekissfromlastnighthekeptthinkingabout.Thefeelofherlipsagainsthis.He’dneveroncehadtheurgetokisstheothergirlsintheGrayBacks,butaroundAna,itwasallhecouldthink
about.Focus.She’slooking.She’llthinkyou’reweirdlikeeveryoneelsedoes.Keepher.
“So,whatdoyoudoforfun?”
“Whatdoyoudo?”hecountered.Notbecausehewasavoidingthequestion,butbecausehewassuddenlyexcruciatinglycuriousabout
whatfilledupherquiethours.Anascrunchedupher
nose.“Don’tlaugh.”“Iwon’t.”“Pinkypromise.”She
liftedherpinkyintheair.“Hookyourpinkyontomineandsay,Ipinkypromisenottolaugh.”
Hedidassheasked
andreveledinthefeelofher.Somuchsothathedidn’tletgoofherfingerafterherecitedtheoath.Hejustsankfartherbackintothecouchcushionbesideherwiththeirpinkieshooked.Sheputherlegsoverhislapasifthey’dknowneachotherforalways.Hesmiledathowfucking
cuteshewas.“Iliketoknit.”“Likeoldladiesdo?
Hatsandsocksandblankets?”
“No.You’resmiling,Easton.Don’tletthatgetoutofhand.”Shewaitedforhimtowipehisamusementoffhisfacebeforeshecontinued.“I
knitclothesforanimals.Turtlesweaterswithspikesontheback,anddogcostumesforHalloween.Ievenmadeadressforaguineapigweddingonce.Peoplesendmespecialrequestsonline,andImakethem.”
Eastonwaitedforthe
laughtodieinhisthroatbeforeheasked,“Andtheypayyoumoneyforthese…costumes?”
Analiftedherchinproudly.“Yes.InevertoldCadenaboutthatstuffbecauseIknewhewouldthinkitstupidandbeneathme,andhewouldaskmeto
giveitup.”“Cadenwasyourlast
mate?”Hisbearrattledalonggrowlinsideofhim.
Analetgoofhispinkyandpressedherpalmagainsthischest.“Notmychoice.Hewasasmartpairing,butIdidn’tcareforhim.”
“Iwouldliketoseeadressforaguineapig.”
Anadroppedhergazetoherhand,butitdidn’thidehersmile.Maybehappinessdidexist.Analookedhappynow.
“Now,yourturn.Tellmewhatyouliketodo.”
Noonehadever
askedhimthisbefore,sohetookhistimeanswering.“Iliketochopwood.”
“Why?”“Becauseitmakesme
feellikemybearisn’tgoingtoripoutofmyskin.”
ThesmilefellfromAna’sface.“Doesitfeellikethatoften?”
Henodded.Bestsheknowwhatshewasinfor.“Allthetime.”
“Everyminute?”Henodded.“Except
it’snotsobadwhenI’maroundyou.Orchoppingfirewood.”
“Whatdoyoudowiththewood?”
“Icouldtakecareofyou.”
Sheproppedapairofthrowpillowsunderherheadandrelaxedagainstthecouch,herlegsstilldrapedoverhim.Shewaswearingjeanshorts,soherestedhishandonhersmoothlegs.“Didyoushaveyourlegs?”heasked.
“Mmmhmm.”“Didyoushavemy
legsforme?IncaseItouchedyouhere?”Whenheranhisfingertipuphershin,sheshivered.
“Yes,”shesaidonabreath.Herfacehadgoneallserious,andherpupilsdilated,makingthebluein
hereyeslookdarker.“Nowstopdistractingme.Whatdidyoumeanabouttakingcareofme?Idon’twantmoney,Easton.Ijustwantyou.”
“Acordoflumbergoesfortwo-hundredfiftytothree-hundreddollarscomewintertimearoundhere.Ichopallspringandsummer
andsellinthefallafterthefirstsnow.”
“Selltowho?”“UntilJasoncame
along,Isoldtobackwoodsman.Peoplewhodidn’tcareIwasalittle…off.Peoplewhoneededfirewoodbecausetheyhadn’tchoppedenoughforthemselves
becausetheyweretoooldorsickortheycouldn’tfindenoughdeadtrees.Theyhavetobedeadalongtimesotheheavygreenmiddlesdryoutandturnwhite.Thosearetheonesthatburnthebest.IcanchargemoreifIsplititforthemanddeliverittotheircabins.”
“Ithoughtyouworkedupinthemountainsasalumberjack.”
“That’soneofmyjobs.Ihavethree.MyanimaldoesbestifIstaybusy.He’sstillwildasshit,butabusymindmakeshimmanageable.Kindof.”
“Jasonhelpsyou
now?”“He’smyfriend.We
wentinaspartnersthispastfall.Ihadalotofwoodtounload,weneededtosellclosertotown,andIcan’ttalktopeople.Ican’t.Jason’sgood.Hetalks.Ichop.”
“IlikeJason.It’sagoodbusinessyoutwoare
doing.”Hestrokedhisfinger
upanddownherleg,watchingthechillsthatwasheduphersoftskininwaves.“Loggingisseasonal,soweallworkdifferentjobsduringfire-season.”
“Whatelsedoyouliketodo?”
“Kissyou.”Hetossedherasidewaysglanceandslidoutfromunderherlegs.Ifhekissedherhereinhisdenwhereshewasspreadingaroundhersexyscent—pheromonesandvanilla—hewouldwantmore.Anawasfragile.Anacouldn’tbedamanlikehim.Eastonstood
andheldouthishand,palmup.“DoyouwanttoseewhatelseIliketodo?”
Herlipspartedslightly,andsheblinkedslowlyassheslidherpalmagainsthisandnodded.Helikedthathehadsuchaneffectonher.Shesmelledsofuckinggoodhewantedto
buryhisfacebetweenherlegs,buthewouldn’t.HelikedAna.Hewantedtokeepher,notscareher.
Shewaswearingathin,soft,blackblouse,andthegoosefleshhe’dconjuredsoeasilyonherlegsbotheredhim,sohepulledhisheavycanvasjacketoffthecoat
rackbythefrontdoor.Hedrapeditoverhershouldersbeforeheledheroutthefrontdoor.Itwaslinedwithwoolandwouldkeepherwarm.
Hegaveaprivatesmilewhenheheardhersniffthejacket.Littlehumanknewhowtousesomeofhersensesatleast.
“Easton?”Anaasked.Hervoicesoundedoddasshetuggedhishand.Theporchlightilluminatedhertroubledeyes,sohedrewupcloser.Perhapsshewasstillcold.Orhungryorthirstyortiredorsick.Shedidn’tsmellsick.Hedidn’treallyknowhowtotakecareofhumans.
“Iwanttotellyousomething.”Anasearchedhiseyesasshesnuggleddeeperintohisjacket.
“Okay.”Thissoundedbad.Hewasalwaysreadyforbad,though.
Shedidn’tanswerforalongtime.Instead,someofthefearsmellcameback,and
shecouldn’tholdhisgazeanymore.Atlast,shesmiledfaintlyandwhispered,“Thankyouforthejacket.”
Thatwasn’twhatshe’dmeanttosay.Itwouldn’thavebeensohardforhertothankhim.Heforgotmannersallthetime,butAnawasn’tlikehim.She
wassocialized.Orcivilized.Buttherewereamillionthingshewasn’treadytotellher,too,sohewouldn’tpush.Thatwouldn’tbefair.“It’sokayifyouhavesecrets.”
Herbigblueeyeswererimmingwithtears.Shenoddedslowlyasherchinquiveredfromwhereshewas
tryingtokeepheremotionsbottledup.
“Softandfulloftears,”hemurmuredashethumbedawaythefirstdropthatfellfromhereyetohercheek.
“Doyouhavesecrets,Easton?”
“Infinitesecrets.”
Moresecretsthanstarsinthesky.
“Ifyoueverwanttotellme,I’llhelpyoukeepthem.”
Eastonmadeatickingsoundbehindhisteethandeasedawayfromher.Danger.Scritchscratch.Secretsandmemorieswerethesame.
Theybelongedtothedark.Hewasstrongenoughtoholdthem,butAnawastoofragiletoshoulderhisbrokenpieces.Hewouldspareherthepainbecausehelikedher.Hewastheavalanche,andshethehummingbird,andtheonlyrealgifthecouldgiveherwastonotcrashdownupon
herandcrushherintooblivion.
“Come,”hemurmured,pullinghertowardhisworkshop.Thisplacewasassacredashisden,buthewantedtoshareeverythingwithAna.Itwasasmuchofhimselfashecouldshowher.“Waithere.”Hedidn’twant
hertrippingovertheworkbenchinthemiddleoranyofhistoolshemighthaveleftlyingabout.Whenhepulledthestringtothesinglelightbulbthathungfromtheceiling,itilluminatedtheentireshop.Easytodosinceitwasn’tverybig.Hecould’vebuiltitmuchbigger,
butthiswasthesizeoftheworkshopDadhadused.Inashopjustthissize,Eastonhadlearnedtobeaknifemaker.
Hewatchedwithareadysmileashereyesdriftedoverthetoolshungonthewallandtheworkbenchwiththetrioofwoodenhandlesheldtogetherwith
clamps,readyforstaining.Shelookedatthebowlofdiscardedbladeshekepttellinghimselfhewouldsalvagesomedaybecausesteellikethatdeservedahomeinafineleathersheath.Hewouldrighthismistakes:badcutsandnotches,weakspotsinthesteel,and
experimentaldecorativeedgesgonewrong.
Shepaddedoverthesawdustfloorandtouchedthefinishedhiltofaknifethatwasreadyforasheath.“Easton,”shewhispered.“Thesearebeautiful.”
Sure,heknewtheywerefineknives,buthearing
Anacomplimenthisworkfilledhimwithpride.Slowly,sohewouldn’tstartleher,hesquaredupbehindherandreachedaroundher.Gently,hetooktheknifefromherhandsandsetitonthetable.Brushinghislipsagainstherneckjusttotastetheskinthere,hepickedupthesharp
awlheusedforengraving.E+A,hecarved
neatlyintothehilt.Girlslikedthingsthatmatched,andnowshewouldhaveonejustlikeWilla,Gia,andGeorgia.“Thisisyours.Myfirstgifttoyou.”Thefirstofmanyifhedidn’tscareheraway.
Anasniffledand
leanedbackagainsthim.Shenuzzledhercheekagainsthisonce.Affectionatelittlecreature.Shelikedtodothat.Softskinagainsthisraspywhiskers.Hesmiledandslidtheknifeintooneofthesheathsthathadbeenhanginguptodry.Thesnapofthebuttonclaspwasloudinthe
silenceofhisworkshop,butnowitwassafeforhertohandlewiththerazor-sharpbladetuckedaway.
Anaturnedinhisarms,andhereyesswamwithsuchadorationitnearlybuckledhisknees.Noonehadeverlookedathimlikethis.Likehewaseverything.
“I’mgoingtokissyou,”hewarned.
Sheslippedherarmsaroundhisneckandleanedup.“Good.”
Hetriedtostaygentle,hereallydid,butwhenAnabithislipandgrippedthebackofhishair,helostcontroloverhisanimalfast.
Heliftedherontotheworkbenchanddughisfingersintoherhipsindesperationtokeephimselfincheck.Agrowlrattledhisthroatasshenippedhimagain.“Careful,woman.”
Awhiffoffear,andthennothingbutarousalagain,anditwasplainasday
Anawasfindingherbraverywithhim.Hesmiledagainstherlipsandplungedhistongueintohermouth.Hedraggedherforwardacrossthetableuntilherlegswrappedaroundhimandhersexpressedagainsthisragingerection.Withasoftmoan,Anarolledherhipsagainst
his,andhejustaboutlostit.Heavingbreath,hetrailedkissesdownhernecktotryandsteadyhimself.Hiseyeswouldscareherifshesawthemrightnow,sowhenshetriedtopullhisgazetohers,heclosedhiseyesandangledhisfaceawayfromher.
“What’swrong?”she
asked,hugginghimtightly.“Iwantyou,”he
grittedout.Wantedtobeburiedinsideofher,butshedeservedbetter.
“Youcanhaveme.I’vewaitedsolongforthis.”Sherestedherpalmonhischeekandpulledhisgazebacktohersagain.Honesty
pooledinherdeepblueeyeswhenshewhispered,“I’myours.”
“Won’triskputtingababyinyou.”
“Youcan’t.I’monthepill.”
Eastongrazedhershoulderwithhisteeth,thenkisseditgently.“Idon’t
knowwhatthatmeans.”“I’monmedicinethat
meansyoucan’tgetmepregnant.”
Wellshit,thatwassorceryrightthere.“It’stoosoon.”
Anahuffedamysteriouslaugh.“It’sreallyreallynot.”
“You’refragile,andI’llhurtyou.”Whythefuckwashearguing?
OneofAna’sdelicateeyebrowsarchedhigh.“Youwon’timpaleme,Easton.Justmakelovetomegently.”
“Gently,”herepeated.Thatwordsoundedimpossiblerightnow.“Gentle
won’tworkinhere.IfItakeyouonmyworkbench,I’llfuckyoulikearuttinganimal.”Hepulledheroffthetableandwhippedheraround,thenstrodetowardhistrailerwithherlegsstillwrappedaroundhiswaist.Whitesheets.Cleanbed.HisAnadeservedslowand
comfortableandeasy.Anasuckedonhis
neckhardashecarriedherthroughthefrontdoorandintohisbedroom.Shitshefeltsogoodagainsthimlikethis.Loweringherbackontothebed,hekissedherlipsandrockedhishipsagainsthers.Shebowedagainstthe
mattress.Sosensitivetohim.Itmadethiseasier.Nohesitation.Noquestions.Everythingwasnaturalwithher.
Eastonliftedoffherjustenoughtopullhisshirtoverhishead.Heduckedintokissheragain,butshesaid,“Whoa,whoa,whoa,whoa,
mister.”Hereyeswentwideasshestudiedhistorso.Helookeddownathimself,butnothingwasamiss.Hedidn’thavescarslikeMattoranythingunsightly.
“What’swrong?”“Youjust…”Ana
lookedstunnedasshegaveaslow-motionblinkandshook
herhead.“Youjustgrewupright.”
“Youmakenosense.”Butasherpalms
driftedoverhiscollarbones,downthecurveofhispecsandovertheridgesofhisabs,heunderstood.Shelikedthewayhelooked.Herfingersshookassheunhookedthe
buttonofhisjeans.Eastongrabbedherhandtosteadythetremblethere.“Areyounervous?”
“Alittle.You?”Heshouldbe,buthe
wasn’t.He’dneverbeensurerofanythingbefore.“No.”
Sheswallowedaudiblyandunzippedhis
pants.Thenwithherfingersinsidehisbriefs,shepushedtheremainderofhisclothesdownhiships.Hisdickhitairbutwasn’tlonelyforlong.Anapulledagentlestrokewithherwarmhandthatconjuredasatisfiedferalnoisefromhisthroat.Armslockedoneithersideofher
head,herolledhishipswithhernextpull.Shithewastoosensitivetoher.Anotherminuteofthis,andhe’dcreamhershirt.Shirt,shirt,shirt—whywasshestillwearingashirt?Straddlingher,hepulledhertopoverherheadandmarveledattheblacklacecontraptionthat
waspushingherperkyboobsuptohercollarbones.Floored,herippedintoherjeansandpulledthemdowntoexposethematchingsee-throughpanties.
“Didyouweartheseforme?”
Anasmiledshylyandnodded.Holyfuck,shewas
gorgeous.Blacklaceandblushingcheeks.Hecouldseebetweenherlegs.Tinypeeksthroughthelace.She’dshavedtheretoo.Heneededinsideofher.Now.
Withagrowl,hepulledherpantiesdownandflungthemtothefloor,thenpulledoffthetitholdershe’d
justunsnapped.Oooh,hernippleswereperfect.Pinklikehercheeksandalldrawnupagainstthecold.Heshouldwarmthemwithhismouth.Leaningforward,hedrewoneinandsuckedonit.Whensherespondedwithahelplesssound,herantheflatofhistongueoveritand
cuppedhishandoverhersex.Herbodymovedagainsthimlikewater.Everytouchusheredareaction.Hisdickwassohardrightnow.Toothick.LookingatAna,thiscouldn’twork.Shewastiny,finebonedlikeabird.Hewouldhurther.
Butwhenhebrushed
herfoldswithhismiddlefinger,shewassoakingwet.Damn,hewantedtotasteherthere.Wantedtotaste?Wasthatnormal?Don’tscareher.
Anareacheddownandpressedhishandagainstherharderasshewrithedagainsthistouch.“In,”shepleaded.
In?Alittlemorepressure,andhisfingerslidintoherbyinches.Anathrewbackherheadashereyesrolledclosed.Ohfuck,thatholewasn’tonlyfordicks.Hisfingerfeltgoodtoher,too.Heeasedinsideofheruptohisknuckle,butthatwasn’twhatgothergoing.Whenhe
bumpedthespotrightaboveherentrance,Anacriedoutandclutchedthecomforter.Herkneesspreadwider,asifshewasinvitinghiminagain.
Thatwasthespotsheliked.Thatwasthespotheneededtowork.Sohedid.
“Stop,stop,stop,”shewhispered.“I’mgoingto
come.”Eastonslidoutofher
immediately.Wasn’tcomingwhatshewanted?
“Iwanttocomewithyou.”
Oh.Eastonkissedherhardashelaydownontopofher.Ana’sbreastsweresoftagainsthishardchest—more
opposites.Hepositionedtheheadofhiscockatherslickentranceandteased.Anabeggedbyrollingherhipsuntilshetookhimaninch,thenagain.Howcouldanythingfeelthisgood?
“Please,”shepleaded.“Iwantyouinsideofme.”
Grittinghisteeth
againsttheintensepleasure,Eastonslidintohertightentranceuntilshe’dtakenallofhim.Heeasedoutslowlyassheclutchedontohisbackwithherclaws.Scratchinglittlemate.Mate,mate,mate.Eastonpumpedhishipshardonce,theneasedoutagain,savoringherbody.Ana
beggedhimtogofaster,buthewouldn’t.Hewasn’tafterathirtysecondfuck-festwithher.Hewantedtotakecareofherbeforeheshothisload.
Hekissedhertoquietherpleading,brushedhistongueagainsthersoverandoveruntilshegrippedthebackofhishairandpulled
himevencloser.Hardin,easyout.Hardin,easyout.
“Easton,please!”Anacried,archingherneckback.
“Fuck,”hegrowledout,buckingintoherfaster.
Overandoverheslammedintoherasthepressurebuiltinhisdick.Anaranherclawsdownhisback
andscreamedouthisnameasherbodypulsedaroundhim,milkinghim.
Hismindwasgoing,fillingwiththesnarling,possessivemonsterinsideofhim.No,no,no,holdon!Growlingoutawildsound,helosthismindanddroveintoheronelasttime.Heat
floodedoutofhiminthrobbingspurts.
Mymate.Mine.Hewantedtokeephis
Anaforalways.Andashebucked
erraticallyintoher,emptyinghimselfcompletely,hedidtheunforgivable.
Hesankhisteethdeep
intohershoulder.
ChapterTen
Avianacriedoutat
themixtureofpleasureandpoignantpainthatshotjoltsofelectricityfiringdownthenervesofhershoulderandarm.ShegaspedasEaston
clampedhisteethdownharder.Hewentrigidaboveherandreleasedhertornskin,thenflinchedawayfromher.Inablur,hewasintheshadowsagainstthewall,lightreflectingoddlyinhiseyes.
Thescentofironfilledtheair,andwarmthran
riversdownhershoulderandontothesheets.Sheclutchedhershoulderastearsofagonyrandownthecornersofhereyes.Whyhadhedonethat?
“Easton,youhurtme,”shemurmuredinabrokenvoice.“Why?”
“Ana,Ana,I’msorry.Fuck.”Hejumpeduponthe
bed,legsoneithersideofhersasheheldouthishandstocalmher.Hiseyesglowedinthelightthatfilteredinfromthebathroom.Hereallywasananimal.Wildandviolent,andnotevenheraffectioncouldslowhisdestruction.
“IloveyouEaston,
andyouhurtme!”Angerblastedthroughher.Betrayallashedagainstherheart.
“Don’tsaythat,Ana!Youdon’tloveme.Can’tloveme.Youdon’tknowme.”Eastondraggedhishorrifiedgazeacrossherhandthathadgoneslickwithblood.Itwasn’tstopping.
Puttingpressureonitwasn’tworking.“Ana,Ana,listen.You’regoingtoTurn.Iputabearinsideofyou.I’msorry,Ana!”Hefelltohisknees,straddlingherhips.“I’msosorry.Mybear—No!Ididit.It’smyresponsibility.Ihavetogetyouhelp.Creedwillknowwhattodo.Imessed
everythingup.I’msosorry.”Avianasearched
Easton’seyes.Thismadenosense.Whyhadhebittenher?ToTurnher?Creedhadforbiddenit.“WhatwillCreeddoifhefindsout?”
“Anyminutenow,anyminutenow.YourfirstChangeshouldn’tbewiththe
monsterwhobrokeyou.”Eastonliftedherinhisarmslikesheweighednothingatallandstrodethroughthehouse.Heyankedopenthefrontdoorassheclutchedhershoulder,buthehadn’tansweredherquestion.
“Easton!WhatwillCreeddo?”
“Killme,asIdeserve.”
“Oh,Easton,whathaveyoudone?”
Creedwouldn’tfindabearinher,though.Therewasn’troomforone.Aravenhadclaimedhersincebirth.Eastondidn’tknowit,butheneverhadachanceof
Turningherintoabear.“Stop,”shewhisperedasheblastedpastthewoodpile.“Easton,stop.Ihavetotellyousomething.”
Confusionandregretmarredhisfeaturesashesetherdown.Hiseyeswerebrightandresigned,andhisbodyhadgonerigid.He
wasn’tgoingtohideherinjury.Hewasmarchingtohisdeathtofindherhelp.Shecouldn’tlethimdothat.
“Youdidn’tTurnme,”shemurmured,searchingfortherightwordsthatwouldfixthis.“Itoldyoutobeyourselfwithme,andyouwere.Iwas
surprised,butit’sokay.Thebiteisokay.Webothgotlostinthemoment.”
“WhatdoyoumeanIdidn’tTurnyou?”Easton’seyesdriftedtoherarm,theoppositeonehe’dbitten,andbacktoherface.Hecantedhisheadandfrowned,thenlookedatherarmagain.The
healingsliceunderherarmwaswhatwasdrawinghisattention.Hetookastepbackandangledhisfaceawayfromher,eyesneverstrayingfromhers.“What’sonyourarm,Ana?”
“Acut.”“Fromwhat?”
Easton’svoicecameouta
lowrumblinggrowl,moreanimalthanhuman.
Sheexhaledslowly,shakily,thenwhispered,“Someonethrewaknifeatme.”
“Who?”Sheclosedhereyes,
andtwintearsescapeddownhercheeks.
“Who,Ana?”heyelled,frighteningthebirdsroostinginthetreesaroundthemintotheairandmakingherjump.
“You.”Eastonpaced,hands
linkedbehindhisheadasheshookit.“Showme.”
“Showyouwhat?”
“Showmemyraven!Showmewhatbetrayallookslike.Feathers,feathers,showmeyourfeathers.Isufferedouttherealone!Allthoseyears.Yearsandyears.Showmethebirdwhowatchedmebreakandthenleftme.”AgonyfilledEaston’seyesasheleanedagainstthe
woodpileandslammedhisheadback.“Please,Ana.Doitfast.”
Aviana’sshouldersshookwithsobsofagony.Shehadn’tknownhesawherthatway.She’dtriedtohelp,nothurthimworse.Closinghereyes,shelettheravenhaveherbody.TheChange
wasinstant,andshebeatherpowerfulwingsagainstthepaininhershoulder.Hardershepressedagainsttheaircurrentsuntilshesatonthelowestbranchoftheclosestpine,staringatthemanwhoownedherheart.Atthemanwhowaslookingatherwithsuchheartbreakinhiseyes.
Chinathischest,hewhispered,“Youcan’tloveme,raven.Youdon’tknowhow.”Eastonsteppedforwardandyelled.Hisyellturnedtoaroarthatshookthetrees,andagiant,silvergrizzlyburstfromhisskin.
Hecould’vereachedherfromhere,asbigashe
was.Hecould’vechargedandrippedherfromthebranch,butEastondidsomethingmuchworseinstead.Heliftedthoseglowinggreeneyestoherandexposedhiscripplingsadness.Herheartburned,asifhehadreachedintoherchestcavityandyankeditoutbetweenherribs.
Heturnedhisbackonherandwalkedawaythroughthetrees,moonlightshiningoffhisgrayback.
Andjustlikethat,Easton—herEaston—wasgone.
ChapterEleven
Eastonbuttonedthe
flyofthetoobigjeanshe’dsnatchedfromalaundrylineofacabinfifteenmilesback.Hedidn’tmindnudity,buthere,itwasdifferent.Here,a
layerofprotectionfeltnecessary.
Withasteadyingbreath,hescannedtheclearingwherehe’dgrownup.Ithadtakenhimallnightandpartofthedaytotravelhereasabear,andnowthesunsathighinthemorningsky,castingtherubbleofhis
childhoodhomeinlight.Theyardwas
overgrown,andyoungsaplingshadsprunguphereandthere.Thewildgrasshadrecoveredfromthewinterandalreadycameuptohisthighs.Heranhishandsoverthetopofthewavinggrassasheapproachedthecharred
rubbleofthehousehe’dgrownupin.Thefaintscentofsmokestillclungtotheburnedlumberafteralltheseyears.Onlytheporchstairsremainedintact,andmossandvibrantgreenovergrowthhadblanketedallbutthesearedendsofthewood.Thishadbeenwherehehad
burnedMomandallofherbelongings,justlikeshe’dasked.
Easton’sliptwitchedattheresidualangerhehadforher.Shehadn’teventried.Hecouldn’tbegintoimaginewhereherheadhadbeenwhenshe’dgoneintolabor.Ithadn’tbeenonhimorthe
baby.Maybeshehadgonemadwithgrief,ormaybeshehadalreadyacceptedherfatefromthatdreamshekeptragingaboutasherfeverspiked.Ithadtakenhertwodaystodie,andallthewhile,Eastonhaddoneeverythinganeight-year-oldboycouldtosaveherandthebaby.
He’dseenawfulthingsinthishouse.
Eastonslammedthedoorandpressedhisfrailshoulderbladesagainstit,thensliddownthesplinteredlengthofit,sobbing.Thebabyhadstoppedmovingyesterday,andnowMomwasgone,too.Itwasn’tfair.
Hescreamedhisrageintotheabyssassomethingshiftedinsideofhim.Fear,anger,loss…loneliness.Therewouldbenomoreroomforhappiness.Theworldwasugly,andnowitwouldswallowhimup.Nomatter.Hisinsideswereuglynow,too.
“Shit,”Eastonraspedout,sinkingdownontothecreakingporchstair.
Everythinghadgottensomesseduphere.Hisentirelifehadbeenshapedinthethree-daywindowwhenhe’dlosthisfamily.
He’ddraggedthesuppliesthey’dgatheredfor
winterfromthehouseintotheshed.Evenateight,he’dknownitwasanawfulideatoburnhisshelter,butitwasthatorgobackintothatroomwithMom’sbody.No,Dadhadgottenafuneralpyreintheclearing.Momgotthecabin.
Theravenbrought
himtwomoreblackribbons.OneforMomandoneforthebaby.He’dknottedthosetogetherandkepttheminhispockettostophisweaktearswhenthehurtwelleduptoodeeply.He’dsetoutonhisown,headedduenorththenextdaytofindhelp,onlytogetlostandturnedaround,
andtocomebackthreedayslaterdehydrated,hungry,andfeelingevenmoreemptythanhehadbefore.Thatfirstwinterhe’dlivedinDad’sworkshop.Eastonhadrationedthesuppliesthey’dgatheredandinsulatedtheoutsideoftheshedwithsprucelimbsandmudshoved
inthecracks,butitwasstillsobone-deepcoldhe’dalmostdiedofit.Hecameoutofthatfirstseasonemaciatedandheartbroken.Andtheravenwaswaiting.Alwayswaitingonthebottombranchesofalodgepolepine.Hecouldn’tcontrolhisshiftsverywellanymore.Sometime
inthoselonelymonths,hisbearhaddecidedhewasbetteroffwithoutthosepeskyhumanemotions,andhe’dbeguntotakeover.Eastonhadn’tmindedsomuchbackthen.Hewouldn’thavesurvivedwithouthisanimalinstinctsdrivinghimtocarvealifeoutofthatharsh
wilderness.Hehadn’tknownitatthetime,butgivinghisbearthatmuchpowercosthimhissoul.
Theravenhadsavedhissanitywhenhewasacubtryingtofigureouthowtofendforhimself,butjustbarely.
Everyyeargotharder,
andthatyoungcrowhadbeenthere,alwayswatching,leavinghimtrinketstofindrightwhenheneededapick-me-up,asifshecouldseehimwearingdown.Heshould’veknownshewasmorethanwhatsheseemed,butshe’dbeenthereaslongashecouldremember,andto
him,shewasanintelligentanimalwhohadbecomehisfriend.She’driddenhishumpwhenhe’dgottenolderandhismusclemasshadstartedcomingin.She’dsatontopofhim,tinytalonsclutchinghisfurassherockedbackandforthwithhislumberinggate—contenttojustbe.When
he’dcaughthisfirstfishinthestreamneartheclearing,he’dtossedherascrapbecausethat’swhatfriendsdid.Theyshared.
EastonstoodandsaunteredovertotheshedhisDadhadbuilt.Itwasstillstandingbutwasleaningdangerouslytotheside.The
weatherhadgottentoitandrottedmostofthewood.Inside,oldrustedbladesandtoolswerescatteredabout.Smallanimalshadmadeseveralburrowsinside,probablyinthewintertimetokeepfromfreezing.Onthebackwall,onanold,rust-colorednail,stillhungthe
snareshe’dmade.Theravenhadbrought
himonethatfirstspringafterhisfamilyhadpassed.Hewasstarvingandwasn’thuntingwithanysuccess,andthevegetablegarden,thefirsthe’dplantedbyhimself,hadn’tbeenproducingmuch.He’dbuiltatreehouseinthe
canopyofthreeancientpinesjustacrosstheyard,butnowonlyafewrottedboardsclungtothebranchesofhisoldden.He’dtakentosleepingupinthetreehousebacktheninsteadofthedraftyshed,anditwasontheunevenporchofhistreetophomethattheravenhad
droppedaloopofwire.Arabbitsnare.
Hehadn’tcaughtadamnedthinginitforthenextthreeweeks,butlittlebylittle,hetaughthimselfhowtoreadsignsforrabbits.Burrows,fur,scat,smell.He’dtaughthimselfwheretohangtheloopsaroundthe
burrowexitssothathecouldfindsuccess.Andoneday,hedid.Onedeadrabbitthatsaidhewouldsurviveanotherfewdays.
Andtheravenhadbeenwatchingwithsomethingakintoprideinhereyes.
Afterthat,he’dused
thatfirstsnareasatemplateformakingninemore.Andbythesecondspring,settingandcheckingsnaresbecamepartofhisdailyroutine.
Lateinthesecondyear,theravenhaddroppedofftwoshinyfishingluresthatglintedinthesun.Shelikedshinythingsbest.Meat
becamehismainsourceoffoodinthoseearlyyearssincegardeningdidn’tcomenaturallytohim.Hehadstruggledtofigureouthowtogetseedsforthenextyear,andhisplantsoftengotyellowpatchesontheleavesandwouldn’tproduce.Eventually,he’dfiguredthat
out,too.Andhisravensatin
hertree,alwayswatching.Byhiseleventh
birthday,however,noteventheraven’spresencecouldkeepthelonelinessatbay.Wildbearsweresolitarycreatures,butBearshiftersweresocialbynature,andhe
hadnoone.Hedidn’tspeakandeventuallylosttheuseofhiswordsuntilhe’dmetCreed.Nowhehadtoworkconstantlyatcommunicatingwithotherpeoplebecausebackthen,forsomanyyears,hisworldhadbeenvoidofhumaninteractions.Cicadas,crickets,injuredrabbits,
bullfrogs,howlingcoyotes…thesewerethingthingsthatfilleduphishead.NotthelaughterfromwhenMomandDadhadbeenalive.Notconversationsabouthowhisdayhadgoneorlullabiestohelphimsleepatnight.Hishumanworldhaddimmedandquieteduntiltherewasno
needforitanymore.Hehadnoonearoundtoteachhimaboutgrowinguporhowtoactaroundotherpeople.Therewasnoverbalcompassforrightandwrong,onlyinstinct.Andabear’sinstinctsweren’tdrivenbygoodandevil.Theyweredrivenbywantandneed.
Whythefuckhadn’tshetoldhimthen?Howmanytimeshadhebeencurledinonhimselfwithhunger?Howmanytimeshadhebeendriventotheedgeofmadnesswithdesperationtohearsomeonetalktohim?Tosayhisname,ortellhimeverythingwasgoingtobe
okay?Howmanytimeshadhebeenbone-deepcoldinthosesnowywintermonthsandbeensurethatdaywouldbehislast?
Yet,she’dneverrevealedherhumansidetohim.Avianahadwatchedandbroughthimtinytreasures,butshehadn’tgivenhim
whathereallydesired—companionship.
Andnowshewasbackafteralltheseyears,andforwhat?Torevealherselfnowafterallthedamagehadbeendone.Afterhe’dlosthismind,lostcontrolofhisbear,andwasworthlessasafunctioningmemberof
society?Histhoughtshadbecomeclearerandcleareraroundher.Hisbearhadquieted,andforaminute,he’dfeltnormal.LikemaybeCreedwasn’tgoingtohavetoputhimdown.Andithadbeensuchahugerelieftofeelsafeforthatinstant,becauseeverymorningEastonwoke
upthinkingtodaywasgoingtobehislastonthisearth.Livinginfearforhislifelikethatfortoolonghadruinedhimfromtheinsideout.
Shecould’veendedhissufferingyearsagobyChangingandtalkingtohim.Bylookingathimlikeshehadlastnightthroughthose
bigblueeyes,asifhewasworthsomething.
Instead,whenhe’dneededafriendthemost,she’dflownawayandlefthimaltogether.
Andaftershe’dgone,outinthesewoodsallalone,Easton’sbearhadkilledthelastgoodpartsofhim.
ChapterTwelve
Avianawaitedfor
hours,hopingEastonwouldcomeback.Hernightvisionwasn’tasgoodasabearshifter’s,andflyingoutafterhimwouldn’twork.Notwith
asoreshoulder,andnotwithoutaclearideaofwherehehadgone.
Withthefirststreaksofdawn,sheflewstifflyfromthebranchshe’dbeenusingasalookoutpost,Changedintoherhumanform,andstumbledintohistrailer.Shewashedthesaltytearstreaks
fromherface,thendressed.Therewasafirstaidkitstillinitsplasticwrappingunderhissink,sosherippeditopenandcleanedthebitemarkasbestshecould.
Ashrillwhistlefromthetrailerparktoldhertheotherswerewakingupfortheirworkday.Shehuddled
intoEaston’sjacketandsatonthefrontporchstairs,waiting.
Willacalledout,“I’llgethim!”overthesoundoftruckenginesroaringtolife.
ThesoundofdryleavescracklingunderfootfalltraveledtoAviana,andshewrungherhandsas
shewaitedforWillatocome.Shecouldn’tfacetheothersrightnow,soshewasgratefulitwasWillawhowascomingtoEaston’strailer.
Thespunkyred-headfrozeinhertrackswhenshesawAvianasittingthere.Willascannedtheyardandasked,“Where’sEaston?And
whydoyousmellsad?”Avianaswallowed
hard.“Easton’sgone.”Willa’seyeswent
hardassheasked,“Gonewhere?”
“Heturnedintohisbearandwentthatwaylastnight,”Avianaexplained,jerkingherchintowardthe
woodsandhiccuppingslightly.“Ithinkhehatesme.”Asobworkeditswayupherthroat,andsheclampedhermouthshut,bitingherliphardtopunishherselfforfallingapartlikethis.Sometimes,shegotsotiredofherselfforbeingsofuckingweak.Sheturnedher
headtowardWilla,butthestretchofherneckpulledonherinjuryandshehissedaspainrippledthroughhershoulder.
“Areyouhurt?”“It’snothingIdon’t
deserve.Willa?CanIaskyousomethingpersonal?”Easton’sbitehadbeen
botheringherallnight.Willasatbesideher
ontheporchstair.“Shoot.”“Ifabearshifterbites
awoman,whatexactlydoesitmean?”
“Areyoufuckingkiddingme?”WillareachedacrossherandrippedEaston’sjackettotheside,
exposingthebandageoverhershoulder.Willarippedintothat,too,andstood.“Youdon’tsmelllikeabear.”
“BecauseIwasn’teverhuman,”shesaidinapatheticwhisper.
Willawasscaryasshitwhenshewasmad,hereyesglowinggreenlike
Easton’sdidwhenhisbearwasriledup.“What’sgoingon?”
Aviana’sfacecrumpled,andshewipedherhandacrossherleakingeyes.“I’veknownEastonmostofhislife,butnotasagirl.I’maravenshifter.”
Theblooddrained
fromWilla’sfaceasshestaredatherwiththoseterrifying,glowingeyes.Hervoicepitchedtoawhisperassheasked,“You’reEaston’sraven?”
Avianasniffled,andherliptrembledasshenodded.“He’stalkedaboutme?”
Willaapproachedandsankdownheavilybesideher.“Yeah.He’smentionedyou.”
“Hedidn’tknowIwasashifterwhenwewereyounger.HethoughtIwasjustacrow,andittookmealongtimetogetbraveenoughtofindhim.IwantedtowaituntilIthoughthewasready
beforeItoldhimwhoIreallywas,butlastnight,hebitme.AndwhenIdidn’tTurn,hestartedpiecingitalltogether.”Avianasaggedagainsther.“Willa,hewassomad.HesaidIlefthim,butitwasn’tmychoice.Nothingwasmychoice.Ilovehim.Ialwayshave.”
“Holyhairytesticles,Crow.”WilladrapedherarmaroundAviana’sshoulderandrestedhercheekagainstthetopofherhead.“Thatisn’tjustabiteonyourshoulder.It’saclaimingmark.Easton’smarkedyouashismate.”
“Oh,mygosh,”Avianasaidonabreath,
sittingupstraightandsearchingWilla’sdimmingeyes.“HediditbeforehefoundoutwhoIwas.”Eastonwasprobablyfilledwithregretnow.Herheartsankevenlower.Hewouldn’twanttokeephernow.Notafterlastnight.
“Willa!Easton!”
Creedyelledthroughthetrees.
“Aviana,listentome,”Willasaidurgently,grabbingherhands.“Youcan’tletCreedseethatmarkuntilyoufindEaston.Youbothwillneedtoexplaineverything.He’sonthinicewithouralpha,andhe
disobeyedadirectordertoclaimyou.DoyouunderstandwhatI’msaying?”
“IneedtofindEaston.”
“Yes.Think,Aviana.Didhesayanythingorgiveyouanyclues?Wherewouldhehavegone?”
“Willa!”Creed
bellowed.“Uuuh,”Aviana
whispered,panicked.“He’sbeenholdingontomytrinketslately.”Memories.Flashbacks.Shedidn’tknowwhatwentoninEaston’shead.Notanymore.Home.Den.Thedivotinthewindowsillsheusedtodrop
hertreasures.Avianagasped.“Hemighthavegonetohisparents’cabin.”
“Areyouokaytotravelwithyourinjury?Youaren’thealinglikeyoushould.”
“Ravensdon’thealinstantlylikebears.IcandoitifIflyinastraightline
there.”Atwigcrackedonthe
trailthatconnectedEaston’ssinglewidetotherestofGraylandMobilePark.
“Hurry,”Willaurged.“Youwon’ttellyour
alpha?”Willalooked
determined.“Letmehandle
Creed.YoujustgetEastonbackhere.”
Withaburstofdesperationnottobeseenbythedragon-bloodedalphagrizzlyshifterstompingthisway,AvianaChangedintoherravenandflappedherwings,ignoringthepainonherleftside.Upandupshe
flewuntilWillawasonlythesizeofanantbythepileofAviana’sclothesbelowher.
Theworldwasgreenbeneathher,coveredinpineforestandbisectedbyriversthatsnakedbackandforthingentlyrollingserpentshapes.Occasionalcabinsdottedthelandscape,butnotmanylived
inthiswilderness.Shecircledonceoverherfamily’sdilapidatedcabinjusttogetherbearing,andthencaughtanaircurrentgoingdueeast.ManymilesseparatedherchildhoodhomefromEaston’s,andshehadn’treturnedsincethedayDadhadpackedthemupand
takenherawayfromtheboyhesawasathreattohisonlydaughter.
Still,thewaywasasfamiliartoherasherflightfeathers.Amilliontimesshe’dflownthisjourneywhenshewasayoungcrow,visitingthebrokenboyinthewoods.
Shelandedonthegnarledbranchofthetreethathadalwaysbeenherlandingplacebefore.Now,thebranchwasn’tthinandcoveredwithtenderpineneedleshoots.Itwasaged,thick,andthebarkwasroughunderhergrasp.
Eastonwasthere,wearingjeansthathung
dangerouslylowaroundhisnarrowhipsasheleanedagainstthebattereddooroftheshed.Hisbackwasbare,butthecoolMarchairdidn’tseemtobotherhim.Eastonhadbeenmadeforthesewoods.Carvedfromthemandmadeinvinciblebyhisstruggleshere.
Heturnedandlookeddirectlyatheroverhisshoulder.Sheexpectedhiseyestobeglowinglikeademon,buttheyweredimandsad.Thecolorwasn’ttheeerielimegreentheyusuallywere,butthedarkergreenofmatureforestmoss.
“Doyouknowhow
manytimesIlookedupontothatbranchyou’reclingingtoafteryouleft?”Histhroatmovedasheswallowedhardandpushedoffthedoor.Heturnedandapproached,hisgatehitchedashelimpedtowardher.“Ayear.ItwasafullyearbeforeIcouldconvincemystupideyesto
stopcheckingforyou.Andnowhereyouare.”
AvianaflittedtothegroundandChanged.Thecoolairstungagainstherbareskin,andshefeltcompletelystrippeddownandvulnerableinfrontofhim,butshehadtotellhimthetruthnow.Shehadtoatleasttrytoexplainit
wasn’tjusthimwho’dbeenhurt.
“Doyouknowanythingaboutravenshifters?”Hervoicecameoutfrailandweak,justlikeher.
Heshookhishead.“Ididn’tevenknowyouexisted.Fuckin’obviously.”
“Mypeoplearen’tlike
yours,Easton.YouareapowerfulapexpredatorshifterwhileI’mabadomen.”
“Idon’tunderstand.”“Doyouknowhow
manyofmypeopleareshoteachyearwhiletheyareshifted?Justbecauseofthebadluckwerepresent.It’s
againstourlaws,onthepunishmentofbeingshunned,thatweexposeourselvestoanyone.”Shearchedhereyebrowsandlookedpointedlyathim.“Anyone.Andyouaren’tjustahumanorascavengershifter,Easton.You’reagrizzly,ashiftermypeoplenaturallyfear.Being
withyouasacrowwasalreadyahugerisk,butIcouldn’thelpmyself.Ihadtobearoundyou,ormylifefeltempty.EspeciallyoutherewhereIwasbeingraiseduntilIcouldcontrolmyshiftsaroundhumans.Whenyourparentsdied—”
“Idon’twanttotalk
aboutthemwithyou.”“Whenyourparents
died,myheartbrokeforyou.IwatchedtheboyIlovedhurtandcryoutforhelp,andIcouldn’tdoanything.Icouldn’ttellmyparentsyouwereoutherealone.Iwasscaredtheywouldcalltheircouncil,andtheywouldcome
outhereandputyoudown.Alonegrizzlycubwithnopeople?Icouldn’ttellanyonewhathadhappenedtoyou.AllIcoulddowastrytohelpyouwithsnaresandluresandscrapsoffoodwhenIcouldsneakitawayfrommycabin.Icouldn’tevencarryadamnedblanketwhenyou
werecoldinthewinters.Watchingyoubreakoverthoseyearsbrokeapartofmetoo.”
“Thenwhydidyouleave?Ifyoucaredsomuch,whydidyouleavemehere?Youweremyonlyfriend.Goddammit,Ana,therewasnoone.Whenyouleft…there
wasnoone.”“Yougotcaughtin
thattrap.Doyouremember?”Avianaclenchedherhandsandforcedhermindbacktothatawfulday.“Youwerehurt,screaming.Bleeding.Ithoughtyouweregoingtodieinthattrap,andeveninmyhumanform,Iwastoo
scrawnytohelp.Youtriedandtriedtogetoutofit,andyourleglookedsobad.”Shewipedhereyesagain.“Iflewbacktomyhouseandtoldmydad.Ibeggedhimtohelpyou,andhewassoangry.HesaidI’dbetrayedmyfamilyandmypeoplebymakingfriendswithyou.Ipromised
nevertoseeyouagainifhewouldjustletyououtofthetrapandnottellthecouncilaboutyou.Iledhimtoyou.”
“Irememberhim.”Eastoncrossedhisarmsoverhischestandlookedoffintotheforestwithafarawaylookinhiseyes.“Hewastall.Skinny.Finebonedlikeyou
are.Hepulledthetrapoffandsetmybrokenbonelikehe’ddoneitahundredtimes.Andthenherippedthetrapoutofthegroundandwalkedoffintothewoodswithitdanglingfromhishandanddidn’tlookback.Ihadn’tseenanotherpersoninsolong,IthoughtI’dimagined
him.Yousenthim?”“Ididn’tknowwhat
elsetodo.Hepackedusupthatnight,andwemovedtoRapidCitythenextday.”Avianawasshiveringsohardnow,herteethchattered.“Didyoufindmylastgift?”
“Theshinyrock?”Shesmiledsadlyand
shookherhead.“Itwasn’tjustashinyrock.Itwasadiamond.Ifounditontheground,andI’dbeensavingit.Itwasmyfavoritepossession.Mydadsaiditwasworthalotofmoney,butIdidn’tcareaboutsellingit.Thenightbeforeweleft,Isnuckoutandvisitedyour
treehouseforthelasttime.Youwerecurledupinsidesleepingwithyourlegallbandaged.IgaveyouthediamondbecauseIhopedthatsomedayyouwouldescapethisplace.”
Eastonscreweduphisfaceandturnedhisbacktoher.Hearchedhisheadback
andmutteredacurse.Helinkedhishandsbehindhisheadbeforehespunbacktoherandwrappedherupinabone-crackinghug.“Ididn’tknowitwasvaluable,butIwouldn’thavesolditevenifIhad.It’sintheboxwiththerestofthepresentsyougaveme.Ididn’tknow.Ididn’t
know.”Easton’swordswere
muffledagainstherneck,andshewasopenlyweepingnow.She’dbeenafraidhewasn’tevergoingtotouchheragain.Heliftedheroffherfeet,andshenuzzledhisfacebecauseshelovedhimsofuckingmuchshecouldn’tbeclose
enoughtohim.Notever.“Easton,Easton,
Easton.I’vethoughtaboutyouallthistime.Missedyousobadlyandcomparedeverypotentialmatetoyou.Iimaginedhowitwouldfeeltoholdyoulikethiswithoutmyfeathers.”
“You’recold,Ana.
You’llgetsick.Shit,you’rebleeding.LookwhatI’vedonetoyou,”hemurmured,settingherdown,hiseyesonhershoulder.Theskinwasjaggedanddeeplytornwherehe’dbittenher,andsureenough,itwasweepingredagain.ThemultipleChangesweren’thelping.
“Iwantedthis.Stopfussingwithit.It’sokay.Iwantedyoutochoosemeforamatesomeday.Ijustdidn’tknowthatwashowitwasdonewithyourpeople.AndIcertainlydidn’tknowyouweregoingtoclaimmeourfirsttime.”
“Ihadn’tdonethat
before.Imessedup.”“Youhaven’tclaimed
anyonebefore?I’mglad.”“No.Imean,I’ve
neversleptwithawoman.”Aviana’smouth
droppedopen.Aslowsmilespread
acrossEaston’sfaceashepressedhisfingerunderher
chinuntilhermouthclosedagain.“You’llcatchflies.”
“Wait,youwereavirgin?Butyouknewexactlywhattodo,andyouweresogoodatit.Youdidn’tevenaskmewhatIliked.Youjustknew.”Okay,shewasramblingbut,deargoodness,themanhadgivenherabona
fideorgasmfirsttry.Andhewasavirgin?“Whydidn’tyoutellme?”
“Whatdifferencediditmake?”Eastonwasstillsmiling.
“Idon’tknow.Icould’velitsomecandlesortakenitsloweror…something.”
“Yeah,well,luckyyou.YougotthefirstBeastonbang,completewithcopiousamountsofblood,teethgnashing,andpain.Congratulations.”
“You’reteasing.”ShelikedthatEastoncouldjokewithherafteralloftheheavygritthathadhappened.The
smileslippedfromAviana’sface.“CanIaskyousomething?”
Eastonrubbedherarmstowarmherandnodded.
“Ifyouwould’veknownIwasyourravenbeforeweslepttogether,wouldyouhaveclaimedme
still?”“AreyouaskingifI
stillwantyouformymate?”Shedippedherchin
once.Hisanswermeanttheworld.
“Idon’tregretmymarkonyou.”
“Wehavetogobackhomeandexplaineverything
toCreed.He’llunderstand.Hehasto.You’remine,andI’myours,andtechnicallyyoudidn’tTurnme,soyoudidn’tdisobeyhisorder.”
“Ithoughtyousaidravenswerenaturallyafraidofbears.”
“Yeah,so?”“SoiftheGrayBacks
scareyou,Icanclaimmyownterritoryandkeepyousafe.Youwon’thavetosmellscaredanymore.”
“Butyouloveyourcrew.”
Hiseyesstayedsteadyandclearonher,buthedidn’tanswer.
“You’dgivethemup
formycomfort?”sheasked,stunned.
“Anygoodmatewould,andsinceI’llbeshitatmostofthis,it’stheleastIcando.”
Avianatrailedkissesdownthelinebetweenhistautpecsandrestedhercheekagainsthisdrumming
heartbeat.“Sillyman,I’dneveraskyoutogiveupsomethingyoulovejustformycomfort.TheGrayBacksaregrowingonme.Takemehome,Easton.”
Withoutaword,Eastonbackedawayandkickedoutofthetoobigjeans.Witheyesfullof
adoration,hehunchedintohimselfandexplodedintothemassivegrizzlybearshe’dtreasuredforalltheseyears.Shewasn’tdumb,orblind.Eastonstruggledagreatdealwithhisanimalsidethankstowhathe’denduredinthisplace.Buthewasstilltrying,andthatspokevolumesabout
thecaliberofmanhewas.Eastonstrodeoffwith
powerfulsteps,hisrazorsharpclawsdiggingintotheearthashemovedawayfromher.Andashereachedthefirstlineoftrees,helookedbackoverhisshoulderandwaited.
Avianasmiledand
Changedintoherraven.Shebeatherwingsagainsttheairuntilshereachedthemuscularhumpbetweenhisshoulderblades.Grippinghissilverfurinhersmalltalons,sheheldonashetookoffinthedirectionofthetrailerpark.
Andthoughyears
stoodbetweenthelasttimethey’dtraveledtogetherlikethisandnow,shewasfilledwiththatsamestomach-flutteringbondshe’dbuiltwithEaston.Shefeltthesameelationshehadwhenshe’dtouchedhisfurforthefirsttimeasaravenwhentheywerechildren.Their
historytogetherstretchedonandon.NomatterwhatlayaheadofthemwithCreed,shewouldbetherewithEaston,standingbesidehim,fightingfortheirsecondchance.
Becausefromthisdayon,shewasnevergoingtoflyawayfromherEastonagain.
ChapterThirteen
Eastonbrushedhis
fingertipdowneachvertebrainherback,almostasifhewerecountingthem.He’dfilledupthetubwithsteamingwaterassoonas
theygotback,butthechillswouldn’tleaveherbody.Avianadrewherkneestightertoherchestandrestedhercheekononesoshecouldseehimbetter.
Easton’sbrightgreeneyesfollowedhisfingerashestartedatthetopofherspineandstartedagain.Hewas
leaningonthetub,chinrestingonhisarm,andanabsentsmileonhislips.
Shewasmarrow-deepexhausted,butEastonhadmadeherabowlofstew,litcandlesinthebathroom,andnowseemedcontenttoforgosleepjusttostareatherskin.Sheunderstood.Avianahad
beendrinkinghiminsinceshe’dfirstseenhimagain,too.
“Whatareyouthinkingabout?”shewhisperedinasoftvoice,afraidtodisturbthemoment.
“Doyourememberwhentherabbitsgottomyvegetablegarden?”
Sheansweredhissmilewithoneofherown.God,shelovedhisdimples.Theywereevenmorespecialsinceheonlyseemedtoflashthemforher.“Youwereeleven.”
Eastonsatupandpushedhergentlybackwarduntilherhairwasimmersed
inthewater,thenheliftedheroutandpouredadollopofshampooinhispalm.Asheworkedherhairintoalather,hesaid,“Iwantedtosnarealltherabbitsandputthemintoastewwithmyvegetables.”
“Butallyoucaughtwasacoldfromobsessivelycheckingthesnaresinthe
middleofthenight.”“Andyoubroughtme
anearring.”Avianagiggledand
leanedherheadbackonhishandinthewater,thenallowedhimtopouraplasticcupoverherhairtorinseoutthesuds.“Notallofmygiftshadtomeansomething,you
know.”“Butyoucouldn’t
bringmecoldmedicine?”Shegiggledharderas
shesatup.“Forfuck’ssake,a
singlepainkillerwould’vedonewondersfortheheadachethatcamealongwithit.Butno.Yougaveme
ashinyearring.”“Ilikeshinythings.
ThatisahighcomplimentthatIcanpartwiththemforyou.Ifounditonahikingtrail.ForsomereasonIcan’tthinkofnow,Ithoughtyouwouldlikeit.Andbesides,you’reabearshifter.Ithoughtyouweren’tsupposed
togetsick.”“AndIhaven’tsince.
Damnrabbitscursedme.”Sheblinkedslowlyas
hetracedherbackboneagain.“WasitawfulafterIleft?”
“Crow,crow,whyareyoustillcold?”heaskedinthatdeeptimbreshewasstillgettingusedto.
“I’llgetstronger.Youdidn’tanswermyquestion.”
Withasigh,Eastonpulledhisshirtoverhishead.Hisabsrippledwiththemovement.Aftertossingitintothepilewithherdiscardedclothes,heshuckedhisjeans,too.Slowly,heslidintothebathtubbehindher,
thenpulledherbackagainsthischestandwrappedhisarmsaroundher.TherewasbarelyanyroominthesmalltubforamanEaston’ssize,buthedidn’tseemtomindfoldinghislegsaroundher.
“Yes.”Hepressedhisforeheadagainstthebackofherneck.“Butit’sdone,andI
wouldn’tchangeitnow.”“Youwouldn’t?”“IfIwould’vekept
youallmylife,Icouldn’tappreciateyoulikeIdonow.Iwouldn’tknowhowbaditcanhurtwithoutyou.”
Oh.Avianaclosedhereyesandmeltedbackagainsthim.Eastonwasbigand
strongandwarm.Alreadyherchillswerelesseningwithhimcurledaroundher.Ithadbeenalongandtryingday,andherstaminawasn’tgreat.Notyet.ButEastondeservedastrongmate,andshewasdeterminedtobecomebetterforhim.
“Easton?”
“Mmm?”herumbled,draggingawashragaroundtheedgeofherclaimingmark.
“Ifeelsafewithyou.”Eastonsnortedand
toldher,“Yourinstinctssuck.”
Shelaughedandsaid,“I’mserious.I’vealwaysfelt
safearoundyou.”“Ibityouthefirst
chanceIgot.”“Becauseyouwanted
toclaimme.”“I’mnotgood,Ana.
I’mnot.”“Youare.”Hedraggedthescruff
onhischinacrossthebackof
herneck,backandforth,backandforth.Hissilentargumentdidn’tmatter,though.Sheknewthetruth.ShesawstraighttoEaston’ssoul,andhewasgoodtothecore.Hejusthadtolearnhowtoactaroundotherpeopleinsteadofreactingongrizzlyinstincts.Sheunderstoodhis
quirksandlovedeachofthem.
“Tellmeasecretnooneelseknows,”shewhispered,tricklingwateroverhisknee.
“Iwanttogosomewherebigandfaraway.SomewhereliketheGrandCanyon.”
“Youdo?”Hislipspressed
againstthebackofherneck.“Mmmhmm.WhenIwasakid,Ithoughtmybearwouldneverletmeoutofmyterritory.”
“Yourparents’land?”“Yep.Heclaimedit,
andthenitgotreallyhardto
leave.Istillliveclose,andsometimesIwishIcouldgosomewhereawayfromhere.Stupid.IknowI’mnotready.MaybeIwon’teverbe.Can’tkeepcontrol.IwenttoDodgeCitytohelpJasonoutlastyear,andthejobtookwaylongerthanitwassupposedtobecauseIcouldn’tstay
humanverylong.Didn’ttellmycrewthatpart.SometimesIjustwanttoseesomethingotherthanthesemountains.Nowyou.Tellmeasecret.”
Avianaleanedherheadbackagainsthisshoulderandsmiled.“Iusedtowatchyousleep.”
“When?”
“Afteryou’dbuiltthattreehouse.Iwouldsneakoutlateatnightaftermyparentswereasleep,andI’dperchonthewindowwherethemoonlightmadeyoulookblue,andI’dwatchyou.Youalwayslookedsocalminyoursleep.Relaxed.Likeakidagain.Likeyouweren’t
fightingforsurvival.IwantedtoChangeandsleepbesideyousobadly,youcan’tevenimagine.Youwerewarmandfeltsafe,andIwantedtobeunderyourarm,sleepingwithyou.”
Eastonhuffedasmallchuckle,andshereveledinthevibrationagainstherback.
Hislaughswereforher.“Easton,aboutwhen
weslepttogetherbefore…”Hepulledherwethair
toherothershoulderandkissedgentlyrightbesideherbite.Itlookedawfulnow,bruisedandtorn.
“Losingyourvirginityisareallybigdeal,”she
whispered.“Doyouwanttotalkaboutit?”
“Losingitisn’tabigdealtoanimals.”
Whenasoftgrowlrattledhischest,deliciouschillsrippledupherskin.Eastonwouldn’ttalkaboutitorlingeronnostalgicthoughts.Sheknewhe
wouldn’t.Hisanswerhadbeenaflippantandhonestdenialthatsexforthefirsttimehadbeenlife-alteringatall.Andtoher,itmadesense.Eastonwasmoreanimalthanman.Hercheekswarmedwithhappinessasshesnuggledbackagainsthim.
She’dbeenhisfirst,
andtheburningmarkonhershouldersaidEastonwantedhertobehisonly.
Eastonkissedherbitemarksoftly,thensettledherwethairbackintoplace.“Ana,Iwon’teverhurtyouwhenwe’rematingagain.Iwon’thurtyouever.”
Hispromisebrought
anemotionalsmiletoherlips.“Okay.”
Hemassagedherbreast,dumpinginstantheatintohermiddle.Hiserectionhadbeenswollenandhardagainstherbacksincehe’dslippedintothetubbehindher,butnow,herolledhishipsslightly.“Youlikewhen
Itouchyouhere,”hemurmured,slippinghishanddowntocuphersex,rightoverherclit.
Anarolledhereyesclosedandnodded.
“Andhere,”hesaidlowasheslippedhisfingerintoher.
Rockingagainsthis
touch,shenoddedagain.Hisotherarm
encircledherstomachandpulledhertightagainsthisdick,standingstraightagainstherspine.Rollinghiships,hepressedagainstherinthesameslowrhythmhefingeredher.Pressurebuiltwitheverystroke,andshe
slippedherhandsbehindhisheadashekissedherneck.ThewarmwaterlappedatherribswhenEastonrestedhischinonhershoulderashebroughtherclosertoclimax.Asoftmoanpushedpastherlipsasherbodypulsedinafastrhythmaroundhisfinger.Shestillcouldn’tbelievehow
goodhewasattouchingher.Shewasalmostembarrassedbyhowfastshecamewithhim,buthedidn’tseemdisappointed.
“Wanttofeel,”hemurmuredinthatgravelly,inhumantimbrethatsaidhisbearwasclose.
Rollingherforward,
hesettledheronherhandsandknees.Eastonslidintoherslowfrombehind.She’dneverdoneitlikethis—liketheanimalsdid.ButwithEaston,itfeltright.Itfeltnatural.Hispowerfulbodycurvedoverhersashepushedhisthickshaftdeepinsideofher.Hewasbigandstretched
her,butshewasready.Relaxedandwet.
Slowly,heeasedbackbyinches,thenthrustintoheragain.Holymoly,hewassexy—agrowlvibratingagainstherback,himnibblingkissesonheruninjuredshoulder.Hispowerfularmflexedand
lockedononeside,whilehisothergrippedaroundherwaist.Thenextthrustwasfaster.Outslow,inhard.Anaarchedherbackandgavehimabetterangle.
“Fffuck,”hewhisperedshakilyasheslammedintoheragain.
Pressurewitheach
stroke.Shecouldclimaxjustthinkingabouthispowerfulbodycoveringher.Hermiddlewastinglingnowandeverythingfeltsogood.Floaty.Numbing.Lockthosearms.Almostthere.“Ah!”shecriedashepushedintoheragain.“Easton!I’mgoingto…”
“Comeforme,”hesaidonagrowlashishipspumpedintoheragain.
Herbodyshattered.Thepleasurewassointense,shehadtoclosehereyesandfocusonnotfallingapart.ThesnarlinEaston’sthroatwasconstantnowashebuckedintoher.Whenher
bodyclenchedaroundhim,Eastonfrozewithhernameonhislips.Hot,pulsingjetsshotintoher,fillingher,drippingdownherthighsashepulledout.Thenheslidbackinandemptiedhimselfcompletely.Herbodypulsedonandon,eachaftershockasintenseasthelastashe
buckedagainsthermoreslowly,drawingeachonefromher.
Thewaterwasgettingcoldagainstherarmsandlegs,butEastondidn’tseeminahurrytosevertheirconnection.Hislipsgonesoft,herankissesacrosshershoulderinstead.Histeeth
grazedherskininasoftbiteeverycoupleofkissesasthepulsingsensationfadedcompletelyaway.Hewassowarm,sostrong,shecouldn’thelpbutfeelsafealltuckedupunderhim,evenwithhisteethbrushingherskin.Hewouldn’thurther.
Andjustasherarms
feltasthoughtheywouldn’tholdheranymore,Eastonslidoutofherandstood,draggingherwithhim.Hebentdownandfoldedherintohisarms,thensteppedoutofthetubandcarriedhertohisbed.Shesmiledlanguidlyatthefreshwhitesheetshe’dputon.Nomorebloodstains
fromwhenhe’dclaimedher,andsuddenlyitwasclearwhyhisbeddinglookedsocleanandsoft.He’dobviouslyspentsomemoneyonthethickcomforterandcrisplinens.Theyweretobanishthememoryofallthenightshe’dsleptonsprucelimbsandpluckedpillowsofgrass.
Thelivingroommightresemblethetreehousehe’dmadehimselfallthoseyearsago,buthisbedroom…thatwashisattempttomoveon.
Eastonsettledherinbedandstoodbesideherwithhisheadcanted.Helookedatherbodyasthoughshewasthemostbeautifulthinghe’d
everseen.“I’mgoingtocleanyou,”hesaidinarumblingvoice.
Shenodded,readyforasoftcloth.Butwhenheloweredhimselftothebedanddraggedatrailofkissesdownherribstoherstomach,itbecameabundantlyclearwhatkindofcleaningEaston
hadinmind.Anaheldinagiggle.Sheshould’veknown.
Hermatelavedhistongueupherstillwetfolds,anddrewasoftsighfromherlips.Hewasmeticulousandrhythmic,andnowhewasdefinitelyconjuringanotherorgasm.Anabentherlegsandgrippedhishair.Easton’s
eyesglowedgreenashelookedupather,andwithonlyasecondofhesitation,hegaveintohersilentpleadingandslippedhistongueinsideofher.
Anamoanedhelplesslyathowgoodhefeltrightthere.Eastongrabbedherhipsanddraggedher
closer,thendrovehistonguedeeper.Archingherback,shecriedoutandclenchedhishair.Hisheadbobbedbetweenherlegsashedrovehercloserandclosertoclimax.“Easton,”sheyelpedasherbodyclenchedaroundhistongueinquick,throbbingorgasm.Helickedheruntil
shetwitchedandlayexhaustedandspent.Eastonkissedtheinsidesofherthighsgently,thenclimbedupbesideherandpulledheragainsthischest.Hepulledthecoversoverthem,thenleanedhischinontopofherhead.Hisdickwaslongandhardagainstherbelly,buthe
didn’tmovetorelievehimselfinher.Instead,hemurmured,“Sleepnow,mate.”
Mate.Shesmiledandnuzzledclosertohim.
Andfinally…finally…afterallthoseyearsofwanting,shegottosleepsafeandwarm
underthearmofthemansheloved.
ChapterFourteen
“Don’tsmellscared,”
Eastonsaid,hiseyesblazingashecastheraquickglance.
“Ican’thelpit.”AvianaclutchedtighttohishandasEastonledhertoward
theGraylandMobilePark.“Yourcrewisintimidating.Allbearshiftersarereally.”
“YetyouarematedtoBeaston,”hemutteredsolow,shealmostdidn’thearit.
Shefrownedattheuseofthatname.Sure,hisanimalwasincontrol,butthatwasbecauseofwhathe’d
beenthrough.Thatbearinsideofhimalsowastothankforhissurvival.Eastonhadlosthisfamilywhenhewasjustakid,thenekedoutalifeinthewoodsallalone.“YousayBeastonlikeit’sabadname,butIthinkit’sfuckingawesome,”shesaiddefiantly.
Hecastherastartledglanceandskiddedtoastop.“Why?”
“Becauseyoumightbeabeast,EastonNovak,butyouarealsoasurvivor,andI’msofuckingproudofhowfaryou’vecome,Icanhardlystandit.Sodon’tutterthatnamearoundmeunlessyou
areowningit.Badass,snarly,scary-eyedmountainmanwhoprotectstheheartofafearfulraven.YouareBeaston.MyBeaston.”
Aslowsmilehadspreadacrosshisfaceasshe’dranted,andnowhisdimplesshowed.“Okay,”hesaidlow,pullingherintoa
hug.“I’mBeaston.”Asharpwhistletrilled
acrossthevalley.Creedwaslettingthemknowitwastimeforthecrewtoheaduptothemountainstocleartimber,buttheywouldhavetowait.SheandEastonhadanannouncementtomakebeforehewenttowork.
TheGrayBackswereallgatherednearthebricked-infirepittalkingwhenEastonledheroutofthetreeline.
“Theretheyare,”Willacalled,lookingrelieved.“Nowwecanhavesomeoneunbiasedsettlethescore,”shesaid,looking
pointedlyatGia.Georgiawasriflingthroughabackpacksittingonafoodpreptablenearthem,andsheshookherhead,thoughshewasstillsmiling.
“Whatisit?”Avianaasked,voicesmallandpathetic.Withafrown,shesaidlouder,“Whatisit?”
Eastonlookedatherproudly.
“Dude,Beaston’sholdingherhand,”MattsaidlowtoJason.
Willakickedhermate’sbootandheldoutbothhandsastheyapproached.InonewasapileofgreenM&Msandintheotherwasa
pileoforange.“Whichonesaresupposedtomakeyouhorny,greenororange?”
Avianasnortedandtriedtothinkbackonherschooldays.“Ithinkit’sgreenmakesyouhorny.”
“Here,Griz,eatthese,”Willasaid,dumpingthegreenpileintoMatt’s
hand.Hesnortedand
poppedthemallinhismouth.“Ican’tevenbelieveyouwantmehornierthanIalreadyam,”hesaidaroundthemouthfulofcandy.
“Soit’sorangetomakeyourboobsbigthen,”Giasaidmatter-of-factly.
“Toldyou.”Avianalaughedand
asked,“CanIhavesomeorangeonesthen?”
Withabigtoothygrin,Willahandedherhalfthepileoforangesandpouredtheotherhalfintohermaw.
Eastonslappedthe
candyoutofAviana’shandswithalookofpanicinhiseyes.“Don’twantbiggerboobsonyou.Toomuch.”
Avianastoodtherestunned,lookingatthebrightcoloredchocolatesscatteredacrossthewhitegravelroad.
Jasonwaslaughingnow,handsaroundhis
stomach,bentover,wheezing.“Dude,it’snotreal.”
“Oh,”EastonsaidwithaconfusedfrownashewatchedJasonfalloverontotheground,kickinghislegsashelaughed.HeswunghistroubledgazetoAvianaandmurmured,“Sorry.”
Shewastryingnottolaugh,reallyshewas,butEastonwassofuckingcute.Sexyasallget-out,eyeswildandbrightashemadesureshestayedjustasshewas.Ifshe’dhadanyquestionthatherflatchestbotheredhermatebefore,itwasdispellednow.
“WhyareyoueatingM&Msforbreakfast?”sheasked.
“Giacravesthemallthetime,”Georgiaexplained.“Willajustmoochesthem.”
“Ihelphereatthem,”Willacorrected.“It’snotmoochingifI’mdoingitoutofthegoodnessofmyheart.”
CreedwasquietbesideMatt,shakinghisheadandlookingtired,asifhiscrewalreadyexhaustedhim.
“Ihavesomethingtosay,”Eastonannouncedinastrong,formalvoice.
JasonkickedintoastarshapeonthegroundandlookedatEaston,upside
down.“Thatsoundsserious.”“Itis.”Eastonlifted
hisgazetoCreedandcockedhishead,exposinghisneck.“Ihavetobegyourforgiveness.”
Creedstoodstraighterashisblackeyeslightenedtoagraythatmatchedtheearlymorningsky.“Whatdidyou
do?”Avianacouldn’teven
lookathimlikethis.NotwhenCreedwasmakingtheairsoheavy.Itwashardtodrawabreathunderhisstare,sosheangledherchindownandlookedatWillainstead.
“AsSecond,Iforbidyoutobleedhim,”Willasaid,
standingtoherfullheightofnotevenfivefoottallandglaringatCreed.
“What?”Creedasked,lookingevenangrier.“Itdoesn’tworklikethat.You’resecond,notalpha.What’sgoingon?”
“Showhim,”Eastonmurmured,nudgingAviana’s
shoulder.Avianapulledher
stretchypinkcottonshirttothesideandexposedthetatteredfleshofEaston’sclaimingmark.
Creed’sdarkeyebrowsjackedup,andheswungadangerousglareatEaston.“Whatthefuckdid
youdo?”“I’dsayeithera
zombiebitherorEastonclaimedher,”WillasaidhelpfullyasshedugaroundinthecrinklypackageofM&M’sformorecandy.
“Enough!”Creedyelled.
Willadidn’tevenlook
cowed,butdamnwhattheelectricityinthealpha’svoicedidtoAviana.Withagrunt,shefelltoherkneesundertheheavinessofthestomach-curdlingangerCreedwasthrowingoffinwaves.
EastonlookeddownatherthenbacktoCreed,eyesblazingasalow,
menacingrumblerattledhisthroat.“Letherup.”
“YouTurnedher?”Creedbellowed.“AfterIforbidit,youTurnedher?”
“Shedoesn’tsmelllikeabear,”Georgiawhisperedfromnearthetablewhereshelookedlikeshewasstrugglingtostay
upright,too.“Ittookyouallof
what…aday?Adaytodisobeyadirectorder?”Creedsaid,handsonhiships.“Whatthefuck,man?”
“She’smine.”“Youjustmether!”“Letherup!”Easton
yelled,voicegonesnarly.
“Oh,forshit’ssake,”Willasaid,“Aviana,moveyourtailfeathers,girl.FuckNoggin’sabouttoChange.”
CreedhunchedintohimselfjustasWillarushedAviana.Easton’ssilverbearexplodedfromhimintheexactmomentahugeblackbruingrizzlyrippedoutof
Creed.“No!Don’thurthim!”
shecriedasWilladraggedherbythewaistoverthegravel.
“Staythere,”Willaordered,eyeshard.Twosecondslater,abrownbearburstfromherskin,andwhenAvianalookedup,Creedand
Eastonclashedsohardtheearthunderherfeetshook.Jasonwasscramblingoutoftheway,andalight-coloredgrizzlywasalreadyhoveringprotectivelybetweenhimandthebattlingbears.Georgia?
ThesheerviolenceofthebearfightheldAvianastunnedinplace.Creedand
Eastonslashedeachotherwithresounding,clawedslaps.Roaring,growling,biting.Bleeding.Thewhitegravelwasbeingpaintedwithred.
EvenwithWillatryingtomaneuverbetweenthemandMattChangingintoared,scarred-upgrizzlyto
help,EastonandCreedonlyhadeyesformaimingeachother.
Shehadtodosomething.
Withapopandflappingwings,AvianaChangedanddive-bombedCreed.Shepeckedhisearandfewoutofslappingrange,
thencircledaround.“Creed,sheisn’ta
bear!”Giascreamed.“Creed,stop!”
Avianatuckedherwingsanddovefortheblackgrizzlyagain,butthistime,shedidn’tgettotouchhim.Thistimeheturnedatthelastmomentandswattedherout
oftheair.Withaterrifiedcawinherthroat,shehitthegrasshard.
Giawasrunningforhernow,roundbellyleadingher.ShefelltoherkneesbesideAvianaandpickedherupgently.“Ohno,”shewhispered,pullinghercarefullytohersoftbosom.
Withalookofpurehumanfury,shestoodandturnedtothebearsbattling.“CreedJosephBarnett!You’rehurtingme!”shescreamed.
Creed’sonyxcoloredbearimmediatelyshrankintothedark-haired,silver-eyedman.Withapainedgrunt,hefellforwardontohishands
andkneesonthegravelroad.WillaandMattrushedEaston,tryingtokeephimfrommurderingthealphainhumanform.
“What?”Creedaskedashestruggledupandstaredinconfusionathismate.“HowamIhurtingyou?”
“Becauselookwhat
you’refightingover!”GiashovedAvianaforward.
“Caw!”Avianasaidhelpfully.Translation:I’mafuckingcrow!NotaTurnedbearshifter.
Creedstaredatherlikehe’dneverseenabirdinhislife.“I…Idon’tunderstand.”
WhenEastontookaswipetooclosetohim,Creedduckedneatlyoutofthewayandyelled,“Easton,Changeback!”
Easton’sroardiedinhisthroatashefelltohiskneesandshrankintohishumanskin.Apainedgrimacewasonhisface,but
itdidn’tstopthedeathglareforCreed.“Ididn’tTurnher.Shewasn’teverhuman.Andifyouwould’vefuckinglistened,Iwould’vehadtimetoexplainthatI’veknownherallmylife.AndIswearonmyden,ifyouhurther,I’mgoingtofuckingbleedyou,GrayBack.”
Jasonstoodtotheside,armscrossedoverhischest,lookinggrumpy.“Thatinsultstilldoesn’tmakeanysense,Beaston.We’reallGrayBacks!”
Willashrankbackintohernakedhumanskinandkickedthegravel.“Goddammit,Creed!”
Mattwasnowagiant,nakedhumanwithscarsalloverhistorso.“Didhehurtyou?”heasked,worryinhisdeepvoice.
“No!HespilledallmyM&M’s!”
“Oh,forfuck’ssake,”Creedsaid.“Someoneexplaintomewhatisgoing
on.”Willastompedher
foot.“Creed,meetEaston’schildhoodfriendwhoisaravenshifter,butonlyEastondidn’tknowshewasaravenshifteruntilyesterdaywhenhegaveheraclaimingmarkwhiletheywereboinkingandshedidn’tTurn.Hegotmad,
heranoff,that’swhyhewasn’tatworkyesterday,andnowyoujustB-slappedthebirdhe’sinlovewith.Youdeservethatscar,”shesaid,jammingafingeratthelongclawmarkacrossCreed’schestthatwasdrippingred.
“You,”thealphasaid,pointingatAviana.“Change
back.”“Youcan’ttellher
whattodo,”Eastonsnarled.“Icanso.She’sa
GrayBacknow.”“Aaaw,”Willasaid,
claspingherhandsinfrontofherchestandshrugginghershoulderswithamushysmileonherface.“ThefinalGray
Back.”Creedstaredather
untilshehadthegoodsensetodrophergazetoherfeet.
“Nowplease,”Creedgrittedout,“ChangebacksoIcanproperlyapologize.”
Inaflushofabsolutemortification,AvianaflewoutofGia’shandsandlanded
ontheground,thenshiftedintoherhumanform.
“Boobs,”Willasanginabarelyaudiblevoice,onlytobeglaredatbyCreedagain.
Jasonsnortedfrombehindtheblondgrizzlythatwasstillstandingprotectivelyinfrontofhim.Heclearedhis
throatandapologizedwhenCreedtossedhimanannoyedglance.
Withasigh,Creedhookedhishandsonhisnakedhipsandsaid,“Aviana,Iwhole-heartedlyapologizeformyactionsheretoday.Ishould’velistenedbetterbeforeIpunishedEaston,and
I’msorryifyougothurtinthatfight.”Hisshouldersliftedandfellinaheavysigh.“Welcometothemostfuckedupcrewofshiftersthateverwalkedthesemountains.”
“C-team!”Willasaid,shakingherhandslikecheerleaderpom-poms.
MostoftheGray
Backswerenakedandbleeding,andGeorgiatheScaryBearwasnowlickingthebackofJason’ssmilingheaduntilhisdarkhairstoodupinalldirections.Mostofthemweresmilingdespitetheviolencethathadjustoccurred,andallwerestaringatAvianawhowashidingher
titsbehindherarmanddoingherbesttocoverherhoneypotwithanoakleafshe’dhurriedlypluckedfromtheground.
Hermouthwashangingopen,butshesnappeditclosedandswallowedhard.Inatinyvoice,shesaid,“Thankyou?”
“Uuuh,Willa?”Giasaidinastrangetonebesideher.“Youwerewrong.Aviana’snotthefinalGrayBack.”
“Whatdoyoumean?”Creedasked,worryslashingthroughhischurning,silvereyes.
Gialookedatadamp
streamthatwastrailingdowntheinsidelegsofherjeans.“Ithinkmywaterjustbroke.”
ChapterFifteen
Eastonpacedthe
smallwaitingroom,bitingtheendofhisnailashecheckedthewindowfortheeight-hundredthtimeinthedirectionofGia’shospital
room.Avianaunderstood.
He’dwatchedhelplesslyashismotherhaddiedduringchildbirth,andnowGiawashavingababy.
Hissnarlingandpacinghadalreadyscaredoffthehumansinthewaitingroom,sonowitwasjust
AvianaandtherestoftheGrayBacks,minusCreedandGia,avendingmachinethatwasnowfreshoutofM&Ms,andanold,scratchycartoonplayingonthesmalltelevisioninthecorner.
“Ishouldbeinthere,”Eastonrumbled.
“No,”Avianasaid.
“GiaandCreedhavetodothisontheirown.Therearedoctorsandnurseswhoknowexactlywhattheyaredoing.She’llbeallright.”
“Butit’stakingsolong.”
“Itusuallydoesforafirstbaby,”Willasaidfromthecornerwhereshehadher
feetdrapedacrossMatt’slap.“She’stough.Giawillbeokay.”
ButevenWillalookedworried.Easton’spacinghadeveryoneunsettled.
Eastonskiddedtoastop,threwthedooropen,andthenboltedintothehallway.Theyallstoodtosee
Creedcomingtowardthemwithabiggrinonhisface.AvianadriftedtothewindowtowatchEastontalktohisalpha.Creedgrippedhisshoulderandtalkedthroughhissmile,andlittlebylittleEastonrelaxed.AndwhenhefinallylookedbackatAviana,hisbrightgreeneyesheld
relief.Herheartstoppedathowbeautifulhewas.
Eastonjoggedbacktoherandpulledherhand,leadingheroutofthewaitingareaandtowardGia’sroom.“Hurry,Ana.CreedsaidIcouldseeherfirstifwehurry.”
Aviana’svisionwas
blurringwithtearsbecauseherEastonwashappy.Shecouldfeelitcomingoffhiminwaves.
Justoutsidethehospitalroom,Creedturnedtotheothersandmurmured,“Giveusaminute.”ThenhepushedopenthedoorandusheredEastonandAviana
inside.Giasatonthebed,
comfortablelookingandeyesonlyforthetinybundleinherarms.Shesmiledemotionallywhenshelookedup,andEastonsatgentlyonherbedandtuckedherdisheveledhairbehindherear.
“Oh,mightylittle
human,lookwhatyou’vedone,”Eastonsaid,hiseyesdippingtothesweetbaby.HepulledAvianacloserandmovedtheblanketfartherawayfromthesleepingbabe’sface.“Lookather,”hesaidonabreath.“Perfectineveryway.Gia,Gia,Gia,goodmommy.”
Gia’sshoulderswereshakingnow,andshewassnifflingassherestedherheadagainstEaston’sshoulder.Creedstoodonherotherside,leaningoverthebabywiththeproudestlookinhisdarkeyes.
“Doyouwanttoholdher?”shewhisperedthickly
toEaston.Hiseyeswentwide,
buthenoddedandheldhisarmsout.Giasetthetinybabygentlyinthecradleofhisarms.
Behindthem,therestofthecrewfiledinandsurroundedGia’sbedwithoohsandaahsatthetiny,
blanketedgirlinEaston’sarms.
Slowly,Eastonleaneddownandsmelledthebaby’sbreath.“Whatdoyoucallher?”
“Rowan,”Creedsaidproudly.
“Arightpropernameforalittlegrizzly,”Willa
said,leaningoverEaston’sshoulder.
EastonlookedupatCreedwithacurious,knowingsmilespreadingacrosshislips.“She’snotagrizzly.”
“What?”Giaasked,eyebrowsfurrowed.“She’sCreed’s.”
“Oh,onelookatthecreatureshe’sharboring,andnoonewilleverquestionit.She’llbeatrueGrayBack.Afire-breatherwithsilverscales,descendedfromthelastmortaldragon,Creed’sgrandfather.”
“Can’tbe,”Creedsaidonabreath.“Shehastoo
muchgrizzlyandnotenoughdragonbloodinher.”
Eastonsmiledatthebabyasherockedherinhisarms.“Ihadadreamabouther.Silvereyesandsilverscales.”
“Adream,”Mattsaid,soundingunconvinced.
Avianagrinnedslow,
knowingEastonwasright.Hermatewasmoresensitivetothingsbeyondthisworld,justlikehismotherhadbeen.
“Don’tbelieveme?”Eastonaskedsoftly.Backandforth,backandforthherockedthesleepingnewborn.“Thensmellthedragon’sfireonherbreath.”
ChapterSixteen
Lastnightwasthelast
timeshewouldsleepinthisoldhouse.Avianazippeduphersuitcaseandpulleditoffthericketybedshe’dsleptinasachild.Inhalingdeeply,
shetookonelastlookatthetinycabinshe’dsharedwithherparentsallthoseyearsago.Asachild,thisplacehadseemedhuge,butthat’swhatchildhoodmemoriesdid.Theywarpedreality,makingeverythingseembiggerandgranderfromsuchasmallpointofview.
Tonight,shewouldbemovingintoanoldsinglewidetrailerintheGraylandMobileParkthatthegirlscalled“ten-ten”andsworewasmagic.Shedidn’tknowwhatshewasgoingtodothereyet.MaybeshewouldteachshifterschoolwhenRowanandtheAshe
Crewkidswereolder.OrperhapsshewouldhelpEastonsellhisknivesandfirewood.Ormaybeshewouldreinventherselfcompletelyandstartanewadventure.Shedidn’tknow.Allsheknewwasthatwhateverhappenednext,itwouldbebesideEaston.
Avianasethersuitcasebythedoorandpulledhercelloutofherpurse.She’dchargeditinthecaruntilthebatterieswerefullbecausethiscallcouldn’tgetcutoff.Itwastooimportant.
Thefloorboardsoftheporchcreakedasshesettled
ontothetopstair,andlookedovertheovergrownfrontyard.Shekickedarusted,bentnailwithherflip-flop,thinkingaboutwhatshewouldsaytothepeoplewhoseopinionmeanttheworldtoher.
Howdidshetellherparentsshe’dturnedherback
onherpeople?Lickingherlips,she
scrolledthroughhercontactsandfoundthenumberlabeledHome.Shemadethecallandbitherthumbnailasshelistenedtoitringandwatchedatrioofbirdsflitacrossthetallgrass.
“Hello?”Dad
answered.“Dad?”“Oooh,baby.What
haveyoudone?”Staticblastedacrosstheline,andDadcalledinamuffledvoice,“Marta,it’sher.Pickuptheotherline.”
Thelineclicked.“Aviana?”Momasked.
“Hi,Mom.”“Honey,areyou
okay?”“Yes,yes,I’mfine.
Morethanfine.Ijust…Ihavetotellyoubothsomethingimportant.”
Thelinewentquiet.Aviana’spulsepoundedhardthinkingabouthow
thoroughlyshewasabouttobreaktheirhearts.Theironlychild,denouncingherpeopleforacrewofbears.
“Goahead,”Dadsaidlow.
Avianaswallowedhardandblewoutalong,shakybreath.“Mom,Dad,IfoundEaston.ItoldCadenno
onthecourtshipbecausethecubIknewallthoseyearsagohasgrownintoagoodman.Amanwhowillmakemehappyandgivemealifefulloflove.Ibelongwithhim.”Herthroattightenedoverthewords.“IbelongwithEastonandhispeople.”
“Oh,honey,”Mom
said,“weknow.”PerhapsAvianahad
heardherwrong.“I’msorry…what?”
“Cadensentsomeofhispeopletowatchyou.Heforwardedusapictureofyousittinginabarwithamanwithgreeneyes.Yourfatherrecognizedhimrightaway.”
“Youknew?”“Wejustwantedto
giveyouachancetotelluswhenyouwereready,”Momsaid.
Dadwassoquietthough,hemustbeangry.That’showhegotwhenhewasreallymad.Heholedupintohimselfwherenoone
couldreachhim.“Dad,I’msorry.”“No,baby,”Dadsaid,
hiswordsbroken.“I’mtheonewho’ssorry.IpulledyouawayfromthatboywhenIknewyou’dbondedwithhim.Evenasyoungasyouwere,youcareddeeplyforhim,andIdidn’tlisten.Iwatchedyou
witherforyears.Iwatchedyouneverconnectwithanyofourpeople.IwatchedyourfacewhenwegotthenewsthatCadenwantedtocourtyou.Ihopedyouwouldbehappy,butyouhadthisdoomedlookinyoureyes.It’ssomethingaparentneverwantstoseeintheirchild.I
waswrongtoseparateyoufromEaston.AndIhope…”Dadclearedhisthroat.Moresoftly,hesaid,“Ihopethatsomedayyoucanforgiveme.”
Avianabitherlipsohardshetastediron.Shecouldn’tfallapartnow.“Dad,there’snothingtoforgive.I
loveyoubothsomuch.Iknowyou’llhavetostoptalkingtomeafterI’mshunned—”
“Oh,nowewon’t,”Momsaiddefiantly.“Honey,we’vealreadybeenshunned.”
“What?”“WetoldCaden
wherehecouldshovehis
threats,anditwaswherethesundon’tshine.Itwasadecisionwebothmadesolelybasedonthatpicture.”
“Whydidyoudothat?”
“Because,”Dadsaid,“inthepictureyouweresmilinglikewehaven’tseenyoudosinceyouwereakid.
Ifourpeoplewanttobanishusforsupportingourdaughter’shappiness,sobeit.LivinganemptylifewithCadenisn’twhatwewantforyou.Wewantthatsmileyouhadinthepicture.TheoneyougetwithEaston.”
Allchokedupbyherparents’sacrifice,Aviana
asked,“Willyouvisitme?IwantyoutomeetalloftheGrayBacks.They’relovely,andsonice.Scary,butprotectiveandfierce,andthewomenaresoimportantinthiscrew.Ifeelstronger.Andmyalphaandhismatehaveabrandnewbaby.Oh,she’ssotinyandcute.AndIwantyou
tomeetthemanI’vefalleninlovewith.Eastoniswildandpowerful,buthe’salsosweetandtakescareofme.Hemakesmehappy.Iwantyoutoseehowhe’sturnedout,andthenyouwon’thavetoworryaboutmelivingwithbearsanymore.Heprotectsme.Always.”
ShecouldhearthesmileinMom’svoicewhenshesaid,“Ofcourse.Wecan’twaittomeetEastonandallofyournewcrew.”
“Yes,”Dadmurmured.“We’relookingforwardtoseeingtheoldcabinagainandseeingyouwithyour…mate.Bearpairs
arecalledmates,right?”Avianalaughed
thicklyandhuggedthephonetightertoherear.“Yes.”Itstillmadehergiddytohearthatword.
“We’rehappyyou’vefoundyourplace,Aviana,”Momsaid,soundingproud.“Ourbravelittleraven.We
loveyou.”“Iloveyouboth,too.
Somuch.”“Okay,honey.We’ll
talksoon.Letusknowwhenyousettleenoughforvisitors.”
“Iwill.”“Bye-byenow,”Dad
said.
“Bye,”Avianasaidonahappysighbeforeshehungup.
Shesmileddownatthescreenofherphoneforalongtime,lookingatherreflection.Itwasthere.Dadwasright.Itwasasmileshedidn’trememberseeingbefore.Atoothyone,given
freelyandeasily.OneconjuredbythejoyEastonhadputbackintoherheart.Herparentshadbeenshunnedbecauseofherdecisiontochaselove,yettheyhadn’tmadeherfeelguiltyoverit.Instead,they’dbeenhappythatshe’dfoundwhatshe’dbeensearchingfor.
Excited,Avianaranbackinsideandgrabbedthehandleofhersuitcase.Afteronelastlookaroundthecabin,sheclosedthedooranddraggedherluggagetohercar.
TheGrayBackCrewwascookingabigmealtonight.Hotwingswithbeer
tocelebratehermovinginto1010.Nowshedidn’thavetogowithaheavyheartthatshe’dhurtherparents.Shecouldherlifewithhernewcrewandthemansheloved.
Now,herfuturewithEastonstretchedonandon.
Shewasfree.****
AvianasearchedthewoodsforherEastontomakesurehehadn’tgottenoffworkearly,butthewoodswereemptysavetheeveningbirdsflittingbacktotheirnestsandthecicadassingingtheirrattlingsong.Thiswasthegame.Sneakinglittletrinketsforherlove,surprise
giftstomakeupfortheyearsshehadn’tbeenabletofindshinypresentsandgivethemtohim.Today,she’dfoundasilverbeadalongahikingtrailmilesaway.
Eastonalwaysgaveherdimplesmileswhenshefoundhimsomethingtotuckawayinhistackleboxof
treasuresunderhisbed.Inthelasttwoweeks,
AvianahadsettledintolifeattheGraylandMobilePark.CreedandGiawerenowparentingtinyRowan,andtheGrayBackswereallsmitten.Willahadherwormfarminfullswingforthefishingseason,andGeorgiahadher
woodstoprotect.Eveningswerespenteatingtogetherasacrewandlaughingintothenight.Yesterday,EastonhadsharedwithhisbelovedGrayBacksthestoryofhowhe’dslowlylosthishumanity,andtherehadbeennotasingledryeyeashefinishedwithhowhe’dfeltthedayhe’d
foundoutAvianawashisraven.
Shewassodamnedproudofherbravebrokenbear.
TheGrayBacksstillfoughtliketitansandbledeachotherregularly,butthatwasunlikelytoeverchange.It’sjusthowhercrewwas,
butthatdidn’tmeantheydidn’tcareabouteachother.Thesepeople,whoshe’dbeensoafraidofallherlife,woulddieforeachotherinaheartbeat.Andnowshewasincludedinthatcircleofsafety.Inthesamemeasure,shewouldgiveanythingforherpeople,whomshe’d
growntoloveindescribablymuch.
Shinysilverbeadinherbeak,Avianaswoopeddowntothewindowsillwhereshealwaysdroppedhisgifts.Itwasthesinglewindowtohisworkshop,justlikethesillshe’ddroppedthatfirstfoldedpaperclip
onto.Ithadasmallsplitinthewoodforbalancingroundobjects,andasshelandedontheledgetodrophertreasurethere,shedrewupshort.
Therewasalreadysomethingsilverandshinyinthecrease.
Thebeadfellfromhermouthandrolledtothe
groundassherealizedwhatitwas.
Itwasaring.Glitteringdiamonds
encircledtheband,andinthecentersettingwasagiftshewouldneverforget.Itwasthediamondshe’dgivenhimallthoseyearsago—herfinalpresentbeforeshe’dleft.
Shescannedthewoods,andhergazelandedonEaston,leaningagainstatreeasifhe’dbeenthereallalong,armscrossedandeyesglowinginthewaningeveninglight.
Avianapushedoffthewindowledgeandtuckedhercrowawayintoherhuman
skin.“Easton,”shewhispered,tearsburninghereyes.
Slowly,heapproached,eyesneverleavinghers.Withaslightsmile,hepluckedtheringfromthewindowsillanddroppedtobothkneesinthedirt.
“Yousavedme—”“Ididn’t.”He’dsaved
himself.“Youdid.”His
eyebrowsliftedasheleveledherwithaseriouslook.“Youarepatientandcaringandunderstanding,evenwhenI’mconfused.Yougooutofyourwaytomakemefeel
caredforandappreciated.”Heswallowedhardandliftedthering.“Ineverwantyoutoleavemeagain.”
Avianafellforwardandhuggedhisshouldersuptight.“Iwouldneverleaveyou,Easton.You’remine.”
Herockedhergently,rubbingherback.“Softand
fulloftears,”hewhispered.“It’stoomuch,”she
murmuredassheeasedbackandlookedatthering.
“It’snot.Youlikeshinythings,andItoldyou,Ihavethemeanstotakecareofyou.Whatdoyousay,Ana?Willyoumarryme?”
Anemotionalsmile
stretchedherface,andshenoddedasthefirsttearslippedtohercheek.“Yes,Easton.I’llmarryyou.”
“I’llmakeyouhappy,”hepromisedasheslippedtheringontoherfinger.“I’llalwayskeeptryingtobebetterforyou.”
Sheshookherhead
andcuppedhischeeks,liftinghiswildgazetohers.“You’realreadyperfectforme.”
ChapterSeventeen
Nervesflutteredin
Aviana’sstomachlikebutterflywings.“Youlookgrumpy.”
Easton’sfrowndeepenedashehookedhis
armoverthesteeringwheelofhispickupandgasseditupasteephill.“Ijustdon’tunderstandwhythoseassholescouldn’twaitfiveminutes.ItoldthemIwasrunninglate.”
Yeah,he’dbeenlatebecauseshemightormightnothavehiddenallhiswork
jeansinthebackofhiscloset.She’dneededtobuythecrewalittlebitmoretime,though,sodesperatetimesandmeasuresandall.
“Areyousureyouaren’tgoingtogetboredtoday?”heasked.“It’shot,andwatchingusstriplumberwon’tbeanyfun.Andwhy
areyouwearingthosecontraptions?”Helookedpointedlyatherwedgeheelsshe’dworntomatchherpastelpinksundress.
“Iwanttolookprettyforyou.”
“Ana,youlookprettyinwhateveryouwear.Thosepokeyshoesaren’tsafeto
wearoutonthelanding.Youcouldbreakanankle.Andputahardhaton.”Hisbeargrowledalongrattlingsoundinhischestashereachedintohisbackseat,thenhandedherayellowhat.Hedraggedhisgazebacktotheswitchbackhewasmaneuveringandadded,“Please.”
Shewastryingherbesttohideasmile.Eastonwasoverprotective,nomatterhowhardhetriednottobe.Hisbear’sinstinctsgotkickedupeasily,andshesecretlyadoredthathefussedoverhersafety.
Shedidasheaskedandsettledthehatonher
head.Itwasgoingtomessuphercurls,butthatwasokay.Pursingherlips,shefiddledwithherengagementring,twistingitbackandforth.Shecouldn’thelpbutwatchhim.Theywerealmostthere,andallofthesecrethardworkwasabouttopayoff.Shehoped.
Eastonshotherasuspiciousglance,thenpulledhisattentionbacktothelastbighillbeforetheyreachedthelanding.WhentheoldFordcrestedthetop,Eastoneasedoffthegasashiseyeswentround.
Thelandingwasfullofpeople,allwaitingforhim.
“Whatisthis?”heaskedashepulledtoastopinfrontofthecrowd.
“They’reallhereforyou.”
“Forme?”Sheswallowedher
emotionsdownandwhispered,“Todayisourweddingday.”
Eastonletoffasmallgaspandblinkedhardatherbeforehelookedattheirweddingguestsagain.“Didyoubegthemtocome?”
“No,Easton.Theycamebecausetheycareaboutyou.”
Hepushedopenthedoorandstoodbesidehis
truck,staringatthecrowdandlookingshockedtohisbones.
MomwascryingfromwheresheandDadstoodwiththeGrayBacks,frontandcenter.Willaletoffashrillwhistleandbeganclapping.Theothersjoinedin,cheeringandwhooping.Taganandhis
AsheCrewweretherebehindtheGrayBacks,alongwithKongandhisLowlandersandHarrisonandhisBoarlanders.EvenClintonwastherewithhisnewcrew,lookingemotionalasheclappedwiththeothers.DamonDayestoodofftotheside,holdinghisgreat-granddaughter,
Rowan,asCreedstoodbesidehim,smilingproudlyatEaston.
Avianawalkedaroundthefrontofthetruckandnudgedhisside.“Whatdoyousay?Youwanttomarrymetoday?”
Eastonwasnoddingoverandoverashiseyes
rimmedwithemotion.“Good,”shesaid,
tugginghishandtowardtheAsheCrew’salpha.Taganwascertifiedtoperformceremonies,andwhenshe’dbravedtheAshelandMobileParktoaskhimtoofficiatethewedding,heandhiscrewhadofferedtohelpherand
theGrayBacksplaneverything.
ShewipedherdamplasheswiththebackofherhandassheledEastontotheedgeofthelandingwhereherparentshaddecoratedthemachinerywithwhiteribbonsandoversizedbouquetsofwildflowers.
“Beforewestart,”Tagansaid,“youralphawantstosayafewwords.”
Creedsteppedforwardandclearedhisthroat.“Easton,fromthedayyouaskedmetotakeyouintomycrew,Iknewyouwerespecial.Iknewyouhadgreatnessinyou.WhenI
cameupwithourname,theGrayBacks,InamedusforyouandyoursilverbearbecauseIknewyouhadpotentialtobethebestofusifyoujustputinthework.Andoverthepastcoupleofyears,I’vewatchedyougrowandopenupinwaysthatIcouldn’timaginewhenIfirst
sawyou,wild-eyedandbarelyincontrol.Andnowyou’vefoundAna,andI’msodamnedproudwhenIseehowwellyoutreather.Howhardyoutrywiththerestofusnow.”Creednodded,darkeyesfilling.“Andtoday,IcansayIwasright.Youreallyarethebestofus.Youturnedout
tobeoneofmybestfriendsandamanIadmiredeeplyfornevergivingup.I’msohappyforyou,man.”Hisvoicecrackedonthelastword,andheturnedasGiahandedhimathickbrownenvelope.
AsCreedrippedopenthesealedflap,EastonhuggedAvianatightlyagainst
hissideandseemedcompletelyoverwhelmedwithemotionashetossedherhardhattotheground.Hekissedherhairlineandlethislipslingerthere.
“Easton,yourmatecametomeandtoldmeyou’vealwayswantedtovisitsomeplacefaraway.AndI
knowyoudon’tthinkyou’rereadytogoalone,orevenjustwithAviana,butweallchippedinand…well…here.”HehandedEastontheopenedenvelope.
Easton’schintrembledashepulledtheitineraryoutandscannedthefirstcoupleofpages.“The
GrandCanyon?”hewhisperedasheliftedadisbelievinggazetoCreed.
“We’reallgoingwithyou,man.Allofyourcrew.Yourpeople.Yourfriends.We’lltakeyouthereandmakesureyoustayincontrol.Damonhasgivenustheentireweekoff,sowe’re
leavingtomorrowmorning.Easton…”Creedsaid,grippinghisshouldersandshakinghimslowly.“It’sgoingtobeamazing.”
“Oh,man.Ijust—faraway?”EastonfumbledhiswordsashehuggedCreedhardandclappedhimontheback.“Thankyou.”
“Allright,let’sgetthesetwohitched,”Tagansaidthroughagrin.“Thereceptionbarbecueisgettingcold.”
AvianalaughedthicklyandsquaredhershouldersuptoEaston,thentookhishandsinhers.Youready,shemouthed.
Easton’sglowingeyeswerecertainashenodded.
Tagan’swordswereloudandclear,echoingacrossthelandingwhenhesaid,“WearegatheredheretodaytowitnessthematrimonyofAvianaKingandEastonNovak.”
“No,”hermatesaid
low,searchinghereyes.“It’snotEaston.”Aslowsmilespreadacrosshisface.“It’sBeaston.”
Surprise
Announcement
Kongwillgethisstoryin
LowlanderSilverback
ComingOctober2015
NewRelease
NewsletterSign-Up
Fornewreleases,exclusivesneak
peeks,andgiveaways,signupfor
T.S.Joyce’sBearShifter
RomanceNewsletterHERE.
WantMoreofThese
Characters?
ReadT.S.Joyce’sbestsellingSaw
Bearsseries.
Completeseries,availablenow.
LumberjackWerebear(Book1)
WoodcutterWerebear(Book2)
TimbermanWerebear(Book3)
SawmanWerebear(Book4)
AxmanWerebear(Book5)
WoodsmanWerebear(Book6)
LumbermanWerebear(Book7)
OtherSeriesbyT.S.
Joyce
FireBears
BearMySoul(Book1)
BeartheBurn(Book2)
BeartheHeat(Book3)
BearValleyShifters
TheWitnessandtheBear(Book1)
DevotedtotheBear(Book2)
ReturntotheBear(Book3)
BetraytheBear(Book4)
RedeemtheBear(Book5)
BearValleyValentine(Valentine’s
DayNovella)
HellsCanyon
Shifters
CalloftheBear(Book1)
FealtyoftheBear(Book2)
AvengetheBear(Book3)
ClaimtheBear(Book4)
HeartoftheBear(Book5)
WolfBrides
WolfBride(Book1)
RedSnowBride(Book2)
DawsonBride(Book3)
StandaloneShifter
Romance
CovetedbytheBear
Amazon
Standalone
Contemporary
AbouttheAuthor
T.S.Joyce
T.S.Joyceisdevotedto
bringinghotshifterromancesto
readers.Hungryalphamalesare
hercallingcard,andthewilderthe
men,themoreshe'llmakethem
pourtheirheartsout.Experienced
athandlinganalphamaleofher
own,shelivesinatinytown,
outsideofatinycity,anddevotes
herlifetowritingbigstories.
Foodie,bearwhisperer,ninja,thief
oftinybottlesofawesome
smellinghotelshampoo,nap
connoisseur,moviefanatic,and
zombieslayer,andmostofthisbio
istrue.
BearShifters?Check
SmolderingAlphaHotness?
DoubleCheck
SexyScenes?Fastenupyour
girdles,ladiesandgents,it’sgonna
tobeawildride.
FormoreinformationaboutT.
S.Joyceandherwork,visither
websitehere.
ContentsOtherBooksinthisSeriesCopyrightChapterOneChapterTwoChapterThreeChapterFourChapterFiveChapterSixChapterSevenChapterEightChapterNineChapterTen
ChapterElevenChapterTwelveChapterThirteenChapterFourteenChapterFifteenChapterSixteenChapterSeventeenSurpriseAnnouncementNewsletterSign-UpWantMoreofThese
Characters?OtherSeriesbyT.S.
JoyceBearValleyShiftersHellsCanyonShiftersWolfBrides
StandaloneShifterRomance
StandaloneContemporaryRomance
AbouttheAuthor