Mentoring as part of GM Commitment to Youth Employment Mentoring Handbook November 2012
Mar 28, 2016
1 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Mentoring as part of GM Commitment to Youth Employment
Mentoring Handbook
November 2012
2 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
CONTENTS
The Background to the GM Revolution Mentoring programme 3
Inspiration for mentoring… 4
Exploring the Mentoring Role 5
Endorsements of the Capabilities 6
Aspirational Futures 7
Types of Mentoring 8
What Mentoring Is Not… 9
Unlocking the mentoring Role 10
The Benefits of Mentoring 11
Key Skills of Being a Mentor 12
Challenge and support 15
Giving and Receiving Feedback 16
Diamond Ranking the Mentoring Skills 17
What is the most reliable component for face to face communication? 18
The Mentoring Process 19
The Cycle of Reflective Practice 21
A Helpful Collection of Popular Questions 22
Models of Support for Mentoring 23
The TGROW Model 24
Using MIAR 26
Where do we meet and what are the concerns around Safeguarding? 29
Instructions for first meeting and support services 30 Appendices
1. Aspirational futures 2. Safeguarding 3. Script 4. GMRM Agreement form
3 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
The Background to the GM Revolution Mentoring programme
At the same time, many local businesses and employers are struggling to meet their skills needs and find it challenging to recruit the most appropriate young people when they have vacancies. In addition, many employers tell us they would like to help even when they don’t have jobs to offer. To support as many young people in to work as possible The Greater Manchester Local Enterprise Partnership is leading a range of initiatives: one of these is the mentoring revolution across Greater Manchester. Thank you for committing your time energy and skills to share your valuable experience with young job seekers. Welcome to the revolution. You will be working with young unemployed people who have been reffered to this
programme by an employment advisor. You will be supporting them as they develop the
knowledge, skills, attitiudes and capabilities that will enable them to secure and maintain
employment.
A commitment of about one hour per week will enable you to initiate and develop a
productive mentoring relationship with a young jobseeker.
What are the expected outcomes of your mentoring Role?
To enable young unemployed people in GM to access the skills networks and
knowledge of experienced people in work
To provide a valued mentoring relationship with a young person, enabling them to
gain positive experiences, skills and knowledge to equip them in the work place
To support young people who are moving towards work
4 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Inspiration For Mentoring…
“I have come to the frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element. It is my personal
approach that creates the climate. It is my daily mood that makes the weather. I posses
tremendous power to make life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an
instrument of inspiration; I can humiliate or humour, hurt or heal. In all situations, it is my
response that decides whether a crisis is escalated or de-escalated, and a person is
humanised or de- humanised. “ Goethe
“We do not see things as they are, we see them as we are, we do not hear things as they
are, we hear them as we are.” The Talmud
“A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new“
Albert Einstein
“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every
difficulty.” Winston Churchill
I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks
as if they were great and noble. Helen Keller
“We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.”
Epictetus
“Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on
earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.” Thomas Jefferson
"A great mentor has a knack for making us think we are better than we think we are. They
force us to have a good opinion of ourselves, let us know they believe in us. They make us
get more out of ourselves, and once we learn how good we really are, we never settle for
anything less than our very best". - The Prometheus Foundation
5 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Exploring the Mentoring Role
It is important to distinguish the role of ‘mentor’ in the context of this initiative. To help
clarify, we see a mentor as someone who is;
“A more experienced individual willing to share knowledge with someone less experienced in
a relationship of mutual trust and who could also be:
“An accomplished and experienced person in work who takes a special, personal interest in
helping to guide and develop a junior or more inexperienced person.”
Are Coaching and Mentoring the Same Thing?
Coaching
Coaching is a method of training, directing or instructing a person or group of people to do a
specific task, achieve a goal or develop certain skills. A coach seeks to impart information; a
coach is committed to another person’s commitment or goal. A coach needs a goal to work
with – winning the game; getting a promotion. It involves monitoring the performance of the
skill or task and giving feedback on how to improve. Coaching is appropriate for specific
skills and short-term goal-oriented situations. Some areas where coaching is used are public
speaking and presenting, learning complex software, sports, music, fitness and most
recently life coaching. Life coaching helps people determine, set and reach personal goals
including, but not limited to, career goals and personal growth. Coaches are usually paid for
their work, and their relationship with those being coached is a professional one.
Mentoring
Mentoring is a relationship built on trust, and one of its primary goals is to make young
people (or persons new to a field of endeavour) more confident in their abilities and talents.
Traditionally mentoring involves an older member of the same profession, a person with
more experience and connections, helping a newcomer to the field. Rather than focus on a
particular skill, task or goal, mentoring is a long-term, on-going process. It is usually a more
personal relationship, based in shared experience. As the newcomer grows, the mentoring
relationship evolves. The mentor often passes on not only tangible knowledge, but also
philosophy, advice and advantages gleaned from years in the field. The mentor may provide
introductions to people or organizations to which a newcomer would not normally have
access. Mentors generally provide guidance, not for personal gain, but out of a desire to help
another individual realize his full potential.
Dictionary:
A wise and trusted counsellor or teacher
An influential senior sponsor or supporter
6 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Endorsements of the Capabilities Employers
“Today business is not just about having the people with the right technical skills and qualifications. Individuals need to interact on many different levels - personal, professional and social. This requires everyone to develop throughout their careers key sets of skills and values that underpin their job and careers. It is important that this starts at school and is learnt not in the classroom but from interaction with people from a range of backgrounds and exposure to different situations throughout our lives.”
Ian Bowman, Head of Sustainability, UK & North West Europe, Siemens plc
“Northern Rail fully supports this programme to provide a foundation for young adults in life, learning and work. The vision is for this project to assist all parties and Northern Rail aims to do this by integrating these competencies into their work experience model and looking at the feasibility of an employee mentoring scheme for 16 – 20 year olds.”
Nicola Hosty, Head of HR, Northern Rail Education/ Learning Providers
“Learners need more skill development than ever before in order to be successful in an increasingly competitive labour market….we are aiming to integrate the Capabilities within a learner’s programme so that they are part of an holistic approach rather than “tagged” on”
James Scott, Curriculum Director, The Oldham College (now Assistant Principal, 14-19
Learning, Trafford College) “The range of courses, including vocational qualifications and resources, on site has led to a significant reduction in NEET figures. The Capabilities have been identified in the School Development Plan as key to reducing this figure further and, crucially, in enabling young people to sustain employment. All faculties will select those Capabilities most strongly linked to their subject where they will be overtly taught. The school management team are clear that this will support the improvement of our young people’s life chances, equipping them for successful pathways in work, learning and life”
Andy Griffin, Headteacher, Broadoak School, Trafford
‘Supporting a young person’s career - their personal Journey through work, learning and life’
7 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Aspirational Futures *See appendix 1
Aspirational Futures is a Greater Manchester 14-19 project which has established an
agreed set of Capabilities, bringing together young people‟s needs with those of
education/learning providers and employers in responding to the skills challenge of the Greater Manchester region. We need to work together to support young people in the achievement of these Capabilities - personal skills and attributes that empower young people, placing them in a position to experience success and progression, within and through, learning, work and life.
8 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Types of Mentoring
Informal Mentoring
Informal mentoring is when a person forms a spontaneous relationship with another person,
often a new employee or student to come alongside him in a new endeavour. In this casual
relationship, the new person seeks guidance and counselling from the more experienced
person.
Structured Mentoring
Organizations, companies and schools create structured mentoring programs. They appoint
inexperienced newcomers with experienced people to train and support them as they work
toward their goals. Many structured mentoring programs include goals of leadership
development, diversity and retention of newcomers. The structure may provide one-on-one
mentoring or a network of mentors.
Peer Mentoring
Peer mentoring assigns mentees to someone with experience who is in their age group.
Peer mentoring usually occurs in educational settings, either consisting of one-on-one
relationships or group mentoring. Group mentoring consists of a mixture of experienced and
new people working together to support one another. Groups meet face to face and via
electronic conferencing at a designated time to discuss issues.
Community-Based Mentoring Programmes
Community-based programmes provide mentors to children, young people and those in
need. Mentoring for programmes like Big Brother, Big Sister includes taking these children
on social outings and helping them with homework. Mentors in community programs work to
positively influence the lives of those in their care. Most of the children in these programs
have been neglected or abused.
Online Mentoring Programmes
In addition to traditional mentoring programmes, various industries have set up online
mentoring programs for people who cannot meet face to face with experienced people.
These organizations, such as SCORE, which counsels small business owners, work with
people around the world who are seeking advice on business and education. These
companies use online conferencing tools or telecommunications to connect mentors with
mentees on designated days.
9 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
What Mentoring Is Not…
You will not be expected to be the parent. The mentee keeps hold of the responsibility to
take action and make things happen. There may be an expectation that you take control and
just do it for them. You may need to remind them that and support them to take up the
responsibility.
You will not need to be the counsellor. You will not be the one to sort out their problems
regarding health and well-being and personal issues. It is useful to have helpful information
that points them in the right direction. You can share details of people and organisations that
can help, then you can return to mentoring them around their skills, confidence and
capability for employment.
You will not be an opportunity for whinging and moaning. You are not there to listen to a
tirade of woes and troubles. You can thoughtfully bring the guide them back to a more
positive direction. It may take patience and persistence but it is never wasted.
You will not be a best friend. You can be friendly of course but the role will have extra
benefits if you can remain objective and retain the potential to challenge in a direct way that
a friend may not be able to do.
You will not be a disciplinarian. It is not for you to tell your mentee off. To chide them for their
mistakes or to point out they are not working hard enough. You can simply and honestly tell
them if their commitment to the mentoring relationship is not coming up to what you both
agreed and expect. Their success or failure remains their responsibility not yours.
You will not be expected to display God like perfection! Even if you have a lifetime of
extensive and varied experience you will never have all the answers. Neither is it useful if
you have. The role of mentor is to challenge, guide, encourage and support the mentee as
they take their own steps forging their own way.
Your training session will have given you the basics of the role and the recognition of the
skills that are important to being effective. However, the real mentoring experience will bring
all of your thinking to life. Once you get going you will better understand the role and you will
find yourself able to navigate through the demands and expectations that might emerge,
remaining focussed on the your role, homing in on the mentee’s development of the
capabilities and attitudes that they need to secure and retain employment.
10 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Unlocking the mentoring Role
The type of behaviours that we adopt in mentoring will have a significant effect on the
outcomes that our mentee will achieve. As mentors we operate best with pulling behaviours:
empowering the people we work with to recognise and develop their own innate potential.
We listen attentively, actively, with full and focussed concentration. Listening at depth will
allow us to choose the best questions and the most appropriate time to challenge. Listening
with our whole self will help us to know when to tread gently and when to push the limits of
comfort.
The ability to paraphrase and summarise succinctly will ensure clarity in the relationship. We
move forward with a greater confidence around a well understood shared meaning of what is
being said. Our feedback is informed by our understanding and our sensitivity. As mentors
we can give accurate, objective feedback . We know when it’s time to be supportive. We
recognise and congratulate achievement but we can also carefully craft a challenge that
emerges from clear feedback. We can certainly guide. We have experience and we can
recognise when it will be useful to share a powerful story or to explain a situation from our
perspective.
However, as mentors we must always allow our mentee the responsibility to choose and to
act. Our guidance is always available. We may have shared our experience but the mentee
should feel comfortable to exercise their freedom to choose. They are to stand on their own
feet, to make their own way. We may inspire and motivate our mentee by sharing our
experiences but the choice must remain theirs or we have strayed into the realm of giving
advice which can lead to our mentee doing something because we directed them, advised
them. Instructing and telling are effective in other roles and in other situations but are not
effective at all in the mentoring relationship.
11 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
The Benefits of Mentoring
For you as a mentor
There are many benefits for you as a mentor. One of the most significant benefits is the
increase in your own self awareness as you work on yourself, seeking to become a better
active listener. Listening at depth and with quality demands that you recognise your own
mental patterns that emerge in judgement and assumption. Your increasing self-awareness
enables you to recognise these patterns and to learn to put them aside and approach the
mentoring role with a sincere, authentic open mind. You will feel a great deal of personal
satisfaction as you see your mentee growing, developing and taking steps to make things
happen in their lives and career.
You may already be an effective communicator but working in a mentoring role will hone
your communication skills. As you approach the sessions with an open mind you can get the
full benefit of the insight you get from seeing another person’s point of view. In this case your
mentee may well be younger and have less experience of the workplace but you can still
benefit from seeing another person’s view point. We all get deeply involved in the work we
do and often get drawn in so deep that we forget to take time out to reflect. Your mentoring
sessions will also give opportunities for you to be reflective. The way you approach the
mentoring sessions will harness the reflective state of mind. You can effectively apply this
reflective state to your own development and the development of your role or your business.
Your own success as a mentor, may well lead you to seek a mentoring experience for
yourself, where you can be the mentee benefitting from an empowering engagement with
another experienced mentor. There is little doubt that as you move forward in your mentoring
relationship with the young people, your views will be challenged. Don’t be surprised if you
gain valuable insights into the day to day pressures of being young and unemployed.
For your mentee
Your mentee will also gain from increased self-awareness. It may well be that there have
been few invitations and opportunities for them to be reflective and to take a look at their
own thinking patterns. It may be a little difficult for some and may well be a source of anxiety.
With some patience on your part, looking within, exploring patterns, ideas and responses
can become a very powerful tool for their development. You should not under estimate the
opportunity that you provide as a skilled active listener. There is real and lasting value in
engagement with someone who can listen attentively and ask timely, thoughtful questions
that sensitively challenge our pre conditioned approaches and thinking. The refection and
the exposure to a different perspective can create a major shift in thinking. It will often in the
long run challenge beliefs and values. It may be the catalyst to significant and positive
change. When you have built rapport you will be able to give objective and focussed
feedback. It may be that constructive positive feedback has been an all too rare experience.
Your supportive comments and your belief in them as individuals are powerful beyond
12 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
measure. Young people can sometimes be a little wary at first, gauging whether the belief
you have in them is genuine. But once the trust is there and they can recognise your belief in
them is authentic it can be a springboard to find new levels of self-belief and eventually a
stronger independent confidence.
Key Skills of Being a Mentor
Active Listening
This is the ability to listen actively with full attention. . It demonstrates sincerity, and that
nothing is being assumed or taken for granted. It applies the skill of suspending for a time
one's own frame of reference, suspending judgment and avoiding other internal mental
activities. It is proactive, accountable and professional. When interacting people often "wait
to speak" rather than 'hear' attentively. They might also be distracted. Active listening is a
structured way of listening and responding to others
The active listening technique requires the listener to feed back what they hear to the speaker, by way of re-stating, summarising or paraphrasing what he has heard in his own words, to confirm what he has heard. The aim is to confirm the understanding of both parties.
When engaged in "active listening" one may include a range of dimensions including interpreting body language, choice of words and tone of voice. In the context of the mentoring relationship, active listening is crucial as it leads to successful open communication, the establishment of common ground between two people, working toward a shared goal, usually the development of the mentee.
Building Rapport
This is an essential element in initiating and maintaining an effective relationship of mutual
understanding and trust with the mentee. Mentors can establish rapport with their mentees
by using effective interpersonal communication skills to actively building trust, and
demonstrate they will maintain confidentiality. In the context of mentoring, good
communication helps to develop a positive working relationship between the mentor and
mentee.
When rapport is established the mentee will feel respected and understood, and will be
motivated to listen and learn from the mentoring relationship. Mentees learn best from
mentors who are sincere, approachable, and non-judgmental. Fundamentals of feedback in
building rapport for the mentor are body language; like open or relaxed posture, nodding or
other affirmation, facial expressions, eye contact and to a limited extent, by words. It is
important for mentors to remember that they are communicating to mentees when they are
speaking and when they are not speaking. In fact according to Albert Mehrabian, (Non-
verbal communication 1971 see page 17 on communication) up to 93% of human
communication is nonverbal. There are more details on how to build rapport on page 16.
13 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Get to know your mentee
Ask about them. Show your interest. Gradually find out what motivates them, what they get
enthusiastic about. What they find easy and difficult. Remember to go easy at first and to
maintain a level of comfort in the conversation. This may not initially be a direct conversation
about work and the workplace but you are looking to build a foundation of trust and rapport.
Using your understanding of body language, and listening skills you can let them know by
your whole approach that you believe in them and value them. You may not share their
values, beliefs and approach but you can understand and appreciate them in the context of
their life.
Be open and honest
Share the challenges and difficulties that you face and have experienced. Be explicit about
how tough it is or was. You can then be supportive in sharing some of the strategies and
approaches that you adopt to tackle obstacles and meet the challenges of the work place.
The responsibility to make choices is always theirs but it will be useful for them to reflect on
different approaches that they might not have come across before.
Recognising permission to challenge
As the relationship develops, trust and rapport will grow; you will be able to offer increasing
levels of challenge and will be able to ask those difficult questions that no one else has
asked. You may be given unconscious permission from your mentee to ask the questions
that they have been reluctant to ask themselves. It will be a subtle acknowledgement that
can be read as you become sensitive and aware to their subtle body language clues and
their talk in response to your questions. You will know when the trust and rapport is there
and you can try to push a little. Maintain a high level of awareness and carefully monitor their
reactions and responses. You may find it helpful to ask your mentee for ‘permission’ to
challenge and give feedback, thereby making this as open a mentoring relationship as
possible.
Questioning
Asking the right questions at the right time is at the heart of a successful mentoring
relationship. Questions can be open or closed. A closed question will usually receive a short
yes or no answer, for example “ Did you have a good journey?” will invite a short yes or no
answer. On the other hand open questions will invite reflection, exploration and longer
answers. For example; “Tell me about the current challenges you experience in applying for
jobs?” is more likely to invite a thoughtful response. These open questions will allow the
mentee to be more descriptive and to add more detail. It is also a good way of exploring
feelings, and motivations around an issue. It is worth bearing in mind that an appropriate,
open well timed question will almost always generate thought and reflection. The mentee
may fall silent for a little while as mental exploration takes place. The mentor should be
14 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
mindful of this and be ready to respect and observe the gap in verbal communication that
occurs as the mentee develops a response. Skilful questioning needs to be matched by
careful listening so that you understand what people really mean with their answers. This in
turn leads in productive directions with further questions and before you know it the
conversation is rolling naturally, positively and productively. Remember that body language
will also play an important part in asking your questions and attentively listening to the
responses. Eye contact, nodding or positive gestures etc See page 21 for some examples of
useful questions.
Generate critical reflection
We learn in different ways. Some of the basic ways that you will recognise are reading,
hearing, discussing and doing but research also shows that there are significant benefits to
being able to engage in critical reflection. This can be encouraged by the thoughtful
questioning of the mentor the invitation to reflect in an objective critical way is of great
benefit to the mentee. Once rapport is built and a level of trust is established you will be
given the unspoken permission from the mentee to move oward examining their
assumptions around a particular area of their life and performance. You will, with thoughtful
questions invite them to challenge some of their beliefs and values about their life and the
way they act. When a question encourages reflection it leads to higher-order thinking. In turn
reflection and higher order thinking will make it much more likely that they apply their
learning and start to use reflective and critical thinking to inform their future planning. Once
they can see the benefits of this approach it can lead to them adopting the cycle of reflective
thinking to other areas of their life and work (see also the reflective cycle diagram on page
20). The mentor’s skill in Questioning strengthens this approach but it can also be useful for
the mentee to develop a reflective journal. This encourages the habit of reflective thinking
and can be a part of feedback for the mentoring sessions.
“Trust is the highest form of human motivation. It brings out the very best in people.”
Stephen Covey
15 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Challenge
Challenge and support
It is widely recognised that the mentoring relationship is most effective when a balance is
struck between challenge and support. The simple diagram that follows illustrates how that a
healthy balance of the two can lead to continuing personal growth;
With a low level or no challenge and support the mentee is likely to remain static in their current position.
If a mentor challenges the mentee but doesn’t provide support in the form of guidance, direction or even emotional encouragement, the mentee can slip backward to familiar practices due to frustration, anxiety or loss of confidence.
Similarly, if a mentor fully supports a mentee without posing significant and relevant challenges, it reinforces what the mentee is currently doing rather than encouraging the development of new knowledge and skills.
By consistently challenging your mentee toward new goals, along with providing or pointing toward a support system to achieve those goals, a mentor keeps the mentee on the path toward growth.
Support
Slipping back Growth
Static
Reinforces
current
position
16 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Giving and Receiving Feedback
The giving and receiving of feedback is an essential ingredient in effective mentoring. It
forms a key part of the confidential, developmental conversation between the mentor and the
mentee. It is easier to deliver feedback as a face to face experience. It is possible at a
distance but requires a high level of skill and an established rapport. Clarity of understanding
is paramount and your decisions around giving and receiving should be driven by the need
to ensure this. From this perspective, email feedback is risky as there is a real danger of
misunderstanding. The overall purpose is to be helpful, not to criticise. It is worth
considering that all our performance improvements start with us receiving information about
the impact our behaviours have on others. The extent to which we can receive and respond
to feedback will be a significant factor in our personal growth. Feedback can be challenging
to the recipient and to some extent this kind of feedback is the type that leads to most
consistent growth as shown in figure 2 on page 14. However, we also need to know when
we have done well and it is useful and helpful to recognise and celebrate achievement.
There is a simple and very effective psychological approach that will always help to facilitate
a good level of listening. The simple principle is to offer something positive and celebratory
initially then to follow up with something challenging. The initial comment serves to attract
the maximum attention from the mentee and then in the receptive and attuned state the
listener is better able to take in the challenge and less likely to see it in a threatening way.
For example; “Brilliant outcome, Eleanor, your determination has really paid off. The
changes you have made in following up your job applications with a phone call have got you
two interviews and one or maybe both may lead to job offers.” What are you going to work
on so as to be ready for the interviews?”
Here are few things to consider that will make giving and receiving feedback more effective;
It is best to stick to factual observations that can be backed up with specific detail, concrete
examples really help. Try to avoid emotional responses of inflammatory remarks. Focus on
the issue or challenge. Your role is to be objective so keep you self-awareness active so you
can avoid judging or criticising even on a mental level. Good mentors encourage others but
are clear and direct in giving challenging feedback. A really valuable skill is to be able judge
the timing and the state of the recipient to ensure the feedback is delivered into a receptive
moment for maximum effect. You will need to measure the improvements in performance
and behaviour and be able to make the adjustments as you go. Documenting conversations
and recording specific goals, targets and aspirations is very valuable and worth doing. This
recording even in note form significantly improves outcomes.
When you are receiving feedback listen attentively with engaging, open body language,
nodding the head and a comfortable level of eye contact etc. Ask if you need to clarify
information. Keep emotional responses in check and recognise if you are becoming
defensive. Stay with the situation and not with your reaction if you want to get the most out of
the feedback. Remember the more we open ourselves up to feedback the more we start to
17 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
understand the impact we have on others and the world around us and the more likely we
are to grow and become more effective at whatever it is we chose to do.
Diamond Ranking the Mentoring Skills
18 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
What is the most reliable component for gaining meaning in face to face
communication?
Words % Tone of voice %
Body language %
The original research that highlighted the dominance of these three main elements in face to face communication was undertaken in 1971 by Albert Mehrabian
From his studies Mehrabian found that in terms of true meaning behind the message; words account for 7%, tone of voice accounts for 38% and body language accounts for 55%.
Mehrabian’s research also concluded that these percentages were most relevant when dealing with communications around feelings and attitudes. He also stated that the figures which show a higher percentage meaning from body language were most applicable when there was a clear mismatch between the words chosen and the tone of voice and body language. What we should take from this as mentors is that when we see or feel a clear ambiguity between the words of our mentee and their tone of voice and body language we should look more closely at the body language for the real meaning of the communication.
There are some important factors to consider when we look to body language to inform our communication and relationship with the mentee; Consider the context of the situation. For example if someone is genuinely cold they hunch up and wrap their arms tightly around themselves. If however they adopt a similar position in an ambient office, you may start to consider if they are in some form of distress. Alone this is a pointer to look for further clues. It is prudent to seek a triangulation of signals, a gesture cluster, that evidence a resistance to the current communication. Look for congruence between the spoken words, the tone of voice and the body language to feel secure that the communication is true. Understanding your mentee and their base line body language will inform your reading of the body language. You may see arm folding and lack of eye contact as a positive response when your previous sessions have been marked by your mentee being unable to stay in the room with the conversation! As part of your own professional development, try to find out about any cultural differences in body language. For example eye contact: most European cultures regard eye contact (not staring) as positive but some Asian and African cultures regard eye contact as confrontational and dis-respectful. Information like this will inform your communications as you develop in the role.
19 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
The diagram below helps us to recognize the complexity of our personalities. It reminds us that the challenge of mentoring asks us to control our assumptions and to hold back our often automatic judgments that we make about others based on how they look or speak. When we meet in any meaningful conversation we do well to remember that we are all unique, wonderfully different in our approach to life. Our common ground is that we are human beings all facing challenges and opportunities, all wanting to express the sum total of who we are as we go about our lives.
20 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
The Mentoring Process
1. _____
2. _____
3. _____
4. _____
5. _____
6. _____
7. _____
8. _____
9. _____
10. _____
11. _____
12. _____
13. _____
14. _____
15. _____
.
True or False
21 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
The Cycle of Reflective Practice
Firstly encourage the mentee to reflect on persoanl experience. You can begin by exploring
areas of interest, concern and challenge. This is the stage of identifying a topic area and
then onto more focussed goals (this is the T and the G in the TGROW model shown below
on page 24). Once a few goals are agreed you can move forward to reflect in more detail
around the goals.
The reflection, when successful will lead to insights and learning that have emerged from
the exploration of the reality of the current situation (this is the R for reality in the TGROW
model). Once the reality has been explored and some insights and learning are establsihed
you are ready to move the mentee toward exploration and development othe possibilities for
next steps based on the insights gained (this is the O for exploration of the options in the
TGROW model).
The last section is the planning of future actions (the W for What will be done in the TGROW
model). The planning stage should facilitate a fairly robust check of the consequences of
actions that may be chosen and taken. If they chose a particular action, it is good practice to
set those actions in a time frame that is achievable.
Often people will use the SMART (Specific, Measureable, Achieveble. Realistic, Time
bound) technique to check goals. The mentee will then go away to take the actions, to try
out the goals or steps linked to the insights they gained in the session. It can be useful to do
some follow up and to check how things are progressing between meetings. The next
meeting starts from reflective process beginning again. The focus is the experience just
gained, richly fed by the mentor from the feedback that the endevours will have yielded.
Plan Insight
and learning
Reflection Experience
Plan
Insight and
learning Reflection Experience
22 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
A Helpful Collection of Popular Questions
What do think will be the most useful/helpful issue we can focus on in today’s
session?
What is on your mind today?
What has gone well so far this week/today?
Describe a situation that has excited you/challenged you this week/today?
Tell me what you have been involved in that has built your confidence/caused you
anxiety?
What are the things that you can control?
What are the strengths and resources that you have to tackle this?
If the Albert Einstein/wise counsellor/you at your best without any limitations had to
find the solution, what would it be? (Invites exploration of unconscious wisdom and
positive role models)
If you could change one thing what would it be and why..?
What do you know about this situation? (explores the facts, separate from
assumptions, beliefs etc)
What have you learned from this experience?
What will you change?
What are the next steps you can take?
If you could create the future you, what would that be?( next 3 weeks/months/years)
What is your most powerful motivation?
What can you do to make this easier/more exciting/more motivating?
How can you measure/check your progress to the goal/s you have set?
23 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Models of Support for Mentoring
Using SWOT analysis
Strengths
I can understand and use IT, I am always
smartly dressed and enthusiastic to learn
Weaknesses
I find it hard to engage in friendly chat. I am
often nervous with new people
Opportunities
My new boss has offered me a few days in a
busy IT office
Threats
I have just lost my flat and I am worried
about where I will live
24 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
The TGROW Model
*This model adapted from John Fowler 2012
25 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
26 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Using MIAR
27 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Ideas Motivation
Ability Resources
28 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
I Want You to Be Like Me…
The world of the employed The world of the unemployed
Ways of behaving traditional accepted, norms understood and conformed to as and when required
Codes of conduct and ethics may not match world of work, limited understanding of the norms and values of the work place.
Accepted informal/formal agreed dress code is adhered to
Casual clothing/fashion/branded clothes are valued buying work clothes could be an issue
Language and subtle respect for seniors hierarchy is accepted and practiced, eye contact, confident and clear communication
May not have skills and understanding to demonstrate respect and subtle responses to work hierarchy. May have low self-esteem and as a consequence word choice (vocab) and voice projection may be limited or in some cases loud and excitable because of stress of new experience and environment. May use inappropriate language due to engrained habit, no awareness of different language for different environments
Arrival on time is expected May have been operating a nocturnal or unstructured time frame
I only use my personal mobile phone at lunch and breaks
Feel ok to use my mobile whenever, it keeps me in touch with everyone. I can access my Facebook and twitter feed. It is a status symbol and my life line…
Focus, engagement and on task behaviour are expected
Initially may have limited attention/interest/concentration in work tasks, may need lots of encouragement/reassurance and clear constructive feedback around task engagement and completion (small steps)
Understanding of strengths, weaknesses and CPD - career pathway
Limited or no awareness of strengths, weaknesses and CPD, no career pathway
Employees motivated by the opportunities of the work place – knowledge, skills and understanding are seen as relevant, valuable and worth persevering for…
Indifferent to/ unable to recognise opportunities for development. Can’t see or buy into the long game (persevering to establish a skill or gain understanding) cannot defer gratification
29 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Safeguarding and Where to meet
As detailed in your training session, you should only meet in public/business spaces.
Consideration should also be given to the following:
Can my mentee easily get to the venue?
Will we be able to comfortably talk and be heard?
Does the venue meet the criteria of the Safeguarding policy (at the back of this
handbook)
Code of Conduct
We are voluntarily entering into a mentoring relationship that we expect will benefit both
parties. The Code of Conduct agreement sets the parameters of the relationship. As a
prospective mentor, you will have signed your Code of Conduct as part of your training
session.
You must ensure that your mentee signs a copy of this at your first meeting and that it is
returned to [email protected]
Do I need to take notes or keep a record of our mentoring sessions?
Record keeping and note taking are a vital part of this mentoring programme but should not
be something that is overly time consuming or distracts from the purpose of your meeting.
Most mentors take notes to help them remember key the points of the discussions. It is
useful if the mentee can make some notes too, especially the areas and goals they are
working toward.
You are required to complete a monthly contact sheet which should be signed by both you
and your mentee. If for any reason, you are unable to obtain the signature of your mentee,
the form should still be completed and returned to
It is worth bearing in mind the thoughts and feelings of the young person you are working
with. It may be that a formal approach, with you scribbling notes may cause them anxiety.
You need to be very clear about confidentiality and it is often best to be explicit and explain
that the notes are to help you to remember and are not to produce some sort of report on
them.
30 New Economy: Prospective Mentor Information This mentoring programme is part of the GM Commitment to Youth Employment. If you would like to find out more about the commitment, visit our website at: www.neweconomymanchester.com
Instructions for your first mentoring Session
Give mentee handbook (you can even talk through it with them)
Ensure mentee signs the code of conduct (return completed form to [email protected])
Complete contact record
Make arrangements for next meeting
Useful Services and help lines
In the event that your mentee discloses any issues that are not appropriate for you to discuss we have gathered a list of services that you refer your mentee to. You must remember that it is not your role to be a counsellor but a mentor in relation to employment related skills.
Alcoholics Anonymous 0845 769 75 55 Frank 0800 77 66 00 Mind 0300 123 33 93 Carers Direct 0808 802 02 02 Lifeline 0808 808 21 21 NSPCC 0800 800 50 00 Samaritans 0845 790 60 60
For more information please contact us.
Email:[email protected]
Follow us on twitter: @Mentor4GM