Fullee Faltoo The Ultimate Pj Collection 14555

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PJ’s & Riddles

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PPrreesseennttaattiioonn

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Kalidas ka ek bhai joote banata hain.Uska Naam kya hai?

Adidas.

Marte hue aadmi ko kya dene kaa?

Birla Plus Cement(Kyun ki is cement mein jaan hain!!)

Ab thoda maths ho jaaye.According to new research,

3+3=8

Kaise...............socho socho............Abey Bewakoof.............Galti se !!!!

Why does a sardar use an Earbud to clean a wall?

Kyun ki usne suna tha ki “Deewaron ke bhi kaanhote hain”

In a pond there are 10 fish, one of them dies, andthe water level of the pond increases. How?

A - The other 9 fish are crying.................

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Ek Ladka lecture attend karta hai.Lecture ke baad use bhookh lagtihai.So he goes to the canteen.Canteen mein woh ek pav leta hai. Jaisehi woh pav khane keliye uthata hai to dekhta hai ki uski plate mein"jannat" likha hai.Ab aapko yeh batana hai ki woh jiska lecture attendkarke aa raha hai! ,us professor ka naam kya hai???

Ishq Ki Chhaon.

(Reason :- Jinke "Sir" ho "Ishq ki Chhaon"

"Pav" ke neeche "Jannat" hogi....)

Two hairs on a bald man's head fall in love with each other and wantto get married, but cannot.Why?

Because under Indian laws, "baal vivaah" is illegal.

A sardar keeps 2 glasses of water next to his bed while sleeping, onewith water and the other without water. Why?

'Pyaas' ajeeb hai kabhi lag sakti hai, kabhi nahi lagti.

One day a man is sitting in the jungle under a tree and a 'popat' sitson his shoulder, and the man dies. Why ?

Ans. Because 'popat' was the name of an elephant.

10 Ants are walking on a road. 9 are black. 1 is white. Why ?

One of them is a widow

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Which Gutkha do giraffes like the most?

A. Manikchand (Oonche log oonchi pasand)

Once a man whispered something into a Sardar's ear.After hearing it,the Sardar died.What did the man say to him?

A. DHISHKYAOO!!!

What is the name of Jackie Chan's Mother-in-law?

A. D-COLD Total (Chan ki Saans!)

Now what is the name of Jackie Chan’s Daughter-in-law?

A. D-COLD Total (Kyunki Saans bhi kabhi Bahu thi!!)

What are the three versions of JAVA software?

1.) Mar JAVA2.) Mit JAVA 3.) Kar JAVA

Paani ka 'popat' kaise karne ka ?

Paani garam karke..nahne ka nahi

Aur ek baar Paani ka 'popat' kaise karne ka ?

Nal khol kar ... Bucket nikal do.

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OOOn the border of India and Pakistan there is tremendous tension butnone attacks. Why ?

Because Dishum Dishum toh Pepsodent ka kaam hai.

Srinath gives a Pepsi bottle to Kumble And Kumble gives it to Sehwag.Why ?

Because Sehwag is the Opener.

Hare and Tortoise appear for HSC. Hare gets 95% and Tortoise gets84%. Tortoise gets into VJTI and the Hare does not. How?

Sports Quota

Ram and Laxman go to the jungle. They need to climb a tree forfruits. Ram climbs easily. Why?

Because Ram is GOD.

Laxman tries climbing.. but cannot climb. Why ?

Because he is V.V.S Laxman.

Once an Auto rickshaw driver goes into NO ENTRY. The Police doesnot catch him. Why?

Ans. Because he was walking.

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5 solutions anyone ?

Cigarette-Boat Series

2 men are sitting in a boat and have only 2 cigarettes, but no match-sticks or lighter, but want to smoke. How do they do it ?

They throw one cigarette in the water , so the boat becomesLIGHTER.

Kisses one cigarette - Toh Doosra Jal Jaata Hai

Throws one cigarette in the air and catches it. Catches win MATCHES.

Sprinkles some water on one cigarette - (Tip Tip Barsa Paani, Paani neAAG lagayi)-(w.r.t MOHRA)

Draws a line with a cigarette on his body which leaves a mark- (w.r.tDAAG - The Fire).

What wud u call a Gal who never laughs....?

Hasina.

What wud u call a Gal who always pushes her father ....?

Pushpa.

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ELEPHANT-BANANA

Series

An elephant has 5 bananas and it is hungry, but yet it does not eatthe bananas. Why ?

Because the bananas are made of plastic.

The 5 bananas are real , but yet the elephant does not eat it. Why?

Because the elephant is made of plastic.

Both the elephant and the bananas are real, but yet it cannot eat it.Why ?

Because the bananas are in the TV.

Both the elephant and the bananas are real and in the TV, but yet itcannot eat it. Why?

Because they are on different channels.

Both the elephant and the bananas are real and in the TV and on thesame channel, but yet it cannot eat it. Why?

Because the TV is off.

Now Finally the Elephant gets a chance to eat the bananas.Why?

Itna kyun soch rahe ho yaar...Kya bigada hain usne aapka...Khane donaa bichare ko!!!

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Once a cockroach was singing a song while he was walking on theroad.But all of a sudden he died.Why?

A. B'coz the song he was singing was HIT!!!

A lizard is on the wall of a theater. After the show,the lizard falls. Why ?

Because it starts Clapping

(Note:- In Marathi,a staircase is called 'Jeena')

A boy and a girl look into each others eyes on a staircase and thenfind themselves in Sahara Desert.Why?

Aankhon hi aankhon mein ishara ho gaya,Baithe Baithe 'Jeene' ka 'Sahara' ho gaya.

Kareena Kapoor does not allow anybody to use the stairs of her apart-ment.Why?

Coz 'Jeena' Sirf Mere Liye!!!

Shahrukh khan ka plural?

ICICI Bank

Why?Coz Shahrukh says - Main hoon naa!

ICICI says - Hum hain naa!

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An elephant was in love with a she-elephant. But the she-elephant went and got married to some other elephant. So ourelephant was very depressed. One of his friends felt sorry for him,and took him to a park to cheer him up. In the park, they sat on asee-saw, but the see-saw broke. Now, which song would our hero sing?

Ans: "See-saw ho ya dil ho, aakhir toot jaata hai."

One fine morning, Ravan felt guilty day for all his bad deeds.He felt that he should go an apologise to Ram for all the prob-lems he had caused. So he went to Ram's house and knocked on thedoor. Ram opened the door and was surprised to find Ravan standingthere. Ravan just kept staring and thinking but didn't say a word.What was he thinking?

Ans: "Kis mooh se maafi maangoon?"

What will you call a person who is departing from India?

Hindustan Lever

If he comes back to India very soon.What is he called?

Hindustan Lever Limited.

Who is Joe?

Kambakt ishq... Because "Kambakt ishq hai Joe!”

Once there was a person who hated evryone....naaa use kisi se pyaarthaa.........naa uska koi yaar thaaaaaa..but strangely !!! he faced onebig major problem.Whenever he used to buy some trousers,jeans frommarket, immediately thezip of that particular thingused to disappear.Why?

Yaar bina "chain" kahan re!!!Pyaar bina "chain" kahan re!!!

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Woh kya hai jo Dil main hain, Mann main hai par Dhadkan main nahi?

Aamir Khan

What will you call a bird who eats stone?

Simple….A stone-eating bird!!

A man is walking on the road with a milk bottle and a car comesspeeding from behind and honks.The man starts drinking the milk.Why?

Because the horn says 'Pee Pee'(Drink Drink)

Elephant and mosquito get married but the mosquito dies on the wed-ding night.Why?

B'coz the elephant puts on 'Good-Night'

What is the opposite of Dominos Pizza?

Domi 'doesn't know' Pizza.

Ek Sardar paani ke andar rehta hain,toh uska naam kya rahega?

Jal-andar Singh

Abhi agar woh paani ke bahar aa jaaye ,toh uska naam kya hoga?

Abey akal ke dushman, soch maat.Paani se bahar aane ke baad naamkaise change hoga!

Three persons (American,Japanese & Indian(Sardarji)) are flying in anaeroplane.They think of an idea of hitting a target on the ground byusing a stone.Now first American tries his luck…and hits thetarget.Now Japanese also tries his hand..but he misses by some dis-tance.Now its sardarji's turn ..and he too throws the stone aiming atthe target..but his stone doesnt even reach the ground..why?

Remember the Stone-eating bird? The bird eats the stone .

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Mangal Pandey Series

What would have been the name of the movie 'Mangal Pandey'….

If Aamir Khan was a bachelor?SINGLE Pandey.

If Aamir Khan wore 'Chudiyas'?BANGLE Pandey.

If it was released during 1993 riots?DANGAL Pandey.

If Aamir Khan was shown as a WWE Wrestler?RUMBLE Pandey.

If Aamir Khan was shown at the Gym?DUMBELL Pandey.

If Dialogues would not be audible?MUMBLE Pandey.

If it was released during Christmas?JINGLE Pandey.

If Aamir Khan was wearing a blanket instead of a coat?KAMBAL Pandey.

If Aamir Khan gets an infection during shooting?FUNGAL Pandey.

If something evil happens while watching the movie?AMANGAL Pandey.

Now that the movie is a flop, what should be its name?BUNDLE Pandey.

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What is the Center of Gravity?

its V .............. the center of "gra V ity.

What would Dharmendra say to Hema Malini if he wants her to callhim up?

Ring De Basanti

A man asks for Priyagold biscuits from Inzamam.Why?

'Haq' se mango!!

If Emraan Hashmi is serial kisser,Who is a parallel kisser?

RAVAN

Once there is a peacock who rides a bike.Every hour he comes to atea stall where some people are sitting.He gives them a smile and goesaway.He does this every hour.Why?

Coz he's riding a TVS Victor("More" smiles per hour)

A boy eats only the inner part of samosa.Why?

Because his mother had told him - "Bahar ka maat khao".

Ek baar ek murgi ped pe chad ke,oodne ki koshish karti hain.Lekin wohgir jaati hain.Doosri baar woh phir oodne jaati hain .Yeh baar who oodsakti hain.Kyun?

Pehli baar girne se uska 'popat' hota hain.

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