Edgewood Pilot First Draft

8/11/2019 Edgewood Pilot First Draft

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EDGEWOOD PILOT

Written by

Ari Dardel

[email protected]


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EXT. EDGEWOOD HIGH SCHOOL - DAY

SUM 41 - THE HELL SONG PLAYS AS...

CAMERON P.O.V. - THE NEW GIRL

Walks out of the back seat of a blue Honda Civic and grabsher backpack. She watches the car drive off and then takes alook around as she slowly makes her way through the parkinglot.

A SENIOR GIRL, 17, stands behind her white convertibleputting lipstick on, wearing a grey gym shirt. She throws thelipstick into her purse and reaches for a white collardshirt. She throws off her gym shirt, revealing a black braand quickly puts the collard shirt on.

Two SOPHOMORE BOYS, 16, pass a large fast food cup back andforth as they take sips and wince from the alcohol.

Outside the doors that lead inside stands a tall JOCK LOOKINGSTUDENT, 17, with a textbook open explaining something to aSKINNY NERD LOOKING STUDENT, 17.

THROUGH THE LOBBY DOOR INTO

INT. EDGEWOOD HIGH SCHOOL - CONTINUED

MR. MATT, 37, holding a cup of coffee rolls his eyes as MISSPARKER, 42, chubby with short red hair skips past him way tooenergetically.

He turns and almost bumps into our eyes, nods his headawkwardly and gets out of the way.

ENTER THE FRONT OFFICE and PAN OUT TO REVEAL:

CAMERON, 15, dirty blonde hair and bright green eyes with avery shy smile handing a school schedule to MARTHA, 53,working the reception desk.

From behind Martha, MR. CONNORS, 41, can be seen closing hisdoor as Cameron watches.

INT. PRINCIPALS OFFICE - DAY

TITLE CARD - 7:45 / Before School.

PETER, 15, with hair gelled to look messy and wrinkledclothes sits slouched back in a chair facing Mr. Connors.

Next to Peter on Mr. Connors desk is a giant tupperware box.


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MR. CONNORSWere gonna put you back onacademic probation.

Peter sits up.

PETERI got off that last quarter.

MR. CONNORSAnd your grades and conduct haveslipped drastically in the merethree weeks this new ones started.If you want me to baby you, Iwont, but push you I will.

Mr. Connors shakes his head.

MR. CONNORS (CONTD)

Your G.P.A. Was 2.7 last quarterwhile you were on probation. Thequarter before that you had a 1.6.Thats a gigantic leap and why?Because you had the faculty on yourass, reporting to your parents on aweekly basis the exact detail ofevery decision you made as astudent. You were trapped intoactually applying yourself and itpaid off. I know how students likeyou think... You convinceyourselves that its you, but in a

defensive way like youre doingyour very best and youre simplynot able to, like most others,retain what youre taught.

PETERThats exactly it though.

MR. CONNORS(Loud)

No, its not!

Mr. Connors composes himself and SIGHS.MR. CONNORS (CONTD)

2.7. Peter. Cut the bull shit andgrow up.

Peter stares blankly at the floor.

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MR. CONNORSYoure a cool kid, right? You makeeverybody, including the teacherslaugh... You have a good heart...Its a small school and like theshow Cheers everybody knows your

name.(Beat)Everybody knows everybody.Everybody knows everybody and thereis an unspoken hierarchy amongstthe student body and you are one ofthe top dogs, but guess what? Thisconnection, this dynamic where youfeel responsible to impress themall each and every day by pushingthe rules as far as they can go,something you for some reasonprioritize over your grades and

your future, does not come withpermanent glory. In three yearswhen youre done here, if you makeit that far, and thats no threatcause contrary to what you maythink I actually do like you,nobody is going to remember whatyou said that day in class that hadeverybody laughing so hard tearswere streaming down their faces.Nobody is going to remember thatcool thing you did that set youapart from everybody else. After

high school nobody gives a damnabout that kind of stuff and youllrealize it was all for nothing. Youknow what isnt all for nothing?Education. Education is somethingyoull carry with you until the dayyou die. Friendships fade buteducation sticks.

PETERI understand what youre saying butcan you consider giving me one more

chance before youre completelysold on putting me back onprobation? Granted I know theresexceptions to everything, I alsoknow placing somebody on Academicprobation in the middle of aquarter because their grades areslipping is not how Academicprobation works.

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Negatively speaking, you have toearn that weekly paper from hell bywhat your report card dictates andnot by what your future report cardis currently shaping up to be atpresent time. Mr. Connors, its

like I could die in a car accidenton my way home from school today.Am I going to? Most likely not, butstatistics show people die in caraccidents every day so it ispossible. When I get my next reportcard my G.P.A. could fall below2.0. Is it going to?

MR. CONNORSMost likely, yes.

PETER

Okay, I could have maybe used ananalogy more probable to myargument but I think you get mypoint.

MR. CONNORSAnd I think you miss mine.

Mr. Connor leans back.

MR. CONNORS (CONTD)At the risk of knocking you, I amso confident that you will blow

that one more chance faster thanI can blink Ill take you up on it.One more disruption that leads youhere nervously asking me how Imdoing and you are back on probationfor the remainder of the quarter.

PETERHey, thats all Im asking for.

MR. CONNORSWell thats all youre gonna get.

Ill be seeing you soon.Peter stands up and grabs his container and smiles at Mr.Connors with squinted eyes like hes trying to read what hemeant by that.

PETERTrick statement?

4.

PETER (CONT'D)


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MR. CONNORSwhats with the tupperware?

PETERMacaroni and Cheese.

MR. CONNORSIm not even gonna ask...

Peter walks away.

INT. SCHOOL LOBBY - DAY

Peter exits the office holding on to his giant container. Hewalks over to Mr. Matt and knocks on the tupperware lid.

MR. MATTWhats up?

PETERCan you store this in the fridge inthe Teachers Lounge for me tilllunch time?

Mr. Matt examines the container for a moment, skeptical.Peter rolls his eyes.

PETER (CONTD)Its not a bomb. Its macaroni andcheese.

MR. MATTI know its not a bomb! Why do youhave such a large... batch ofmacaroni and cheese?

PETERIts for lunch, okay?

MR. MATTYoure gonna eat all that forlunch?

PETERWere having a feast...

MR. MATTA feast?

PETERA feast, yes.

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MR. MATTJust this once. Dont make a habitout of asking me to do stupid shitfor you though.

PETER

Thank you.

MR. MATTDid you do your Music Appreciationhomework?

PETEROf course.

MR. MATTPlease do it.

PETER

I just told you I did.

MR. MATTIts a small essay on Mozart. Imnot asking for much.

PETERIll do it.

Mr. Matt gives him a I dont quite believe you look.

PETER (CONTD)Ill do it at lunch, okay?

Mr. Matt starts backing up and nodding his head, latched onto the container of macaroni and cheese.

MR. MATTIll see you seventh period.

He bumps into Miss Parker as he stares Peter down, nearlydropping the container while miss Parker loses her grip on abunch of papers and they scatter everywhere.

Mr. Matt bends down and begins helping her retrieve them all.

MISS PARKERFudge!

He gives her a youre so weird look.

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INT. CAFETERIA - DAY

ANDREW, 15 and KATIE, 15 are seated on the surface of a bluelunch table. Peter enters and makes his way over to them.

Katie is tall, her clothes are a bit baggy and she doesnt

wear make up. Shes still very attractive though. Andrew ischubby but built.

ANDREW(To Peter)

Hey, which one is better...Face/Off or 8MM?

PETER8MM. Thats a fact.

ANDREW(To Katie)

I told you.

Katie rolls her eyes.

KATIEThats an opinion, not a fact.

PETERYou like Face/Off more than 8MM?

KATIEI like neither, but if I had topick one Id go with Face/Off.

Andrews been on a Nic Cage kicklately and hes dragged me into itagainst my will. Have you ever beenraped by Nicholas Cage? Its notfun.

PETERWell, I definitely agree neitherare anything to write home aboutbut at least in 8MM you getPhoenix.

KATIEYeah, but I didnt like him in thatmovie. There was something abouthim that made me feel reallyuncomfortable.

ANDREWThats called good writing, okay?

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KATIENo, cause it wasnt gooduncomfortable. It was just awkwardand cringing. It made me feelall... I dont know.

ANDREW(To Katie)Hey, earmuffs...

He covers her ears with his hands.

ANDREW (CONTD)(To Peter)

You see the new girl? Hot ashell... Our grade too I heard.

Katie throws Andrews hands off of her and punches his armextremely hard. Andrew sarcastically drops his mouth in shock

and LAUGHS.

ANDREW (CONTD)What?!

KATIEJerk!

ANDREWWhy?!

KATIEYou can binge watch the rest of

your Nicholas Cage films all byyourself.

She walks away. Andrew shakes his head with a smile and rubshis arm.

ANDREWBitch.

Katie rushes back like a lion ready to pounce on its prey.

ANDREW (CONTD)

No, I was kidding!Katie clenches her fist.

ANDREW (CONTD)I was kidding!

She punches him even harder than before in the same spot.

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ANDREW (CONTD)Ouch! God dammit...

She walks away LAUGHING.

PETER

(Laughing)You want a cigarette before homeroom?

Andrew rubs his arm again.

ANDREWI do now, yeah.

The first bell RINGS.

ANDREW (CONTD)Shit, lets hurry.

INT. ENGLISH CLASS - DAY

A room full of rowdy students. MISS HENDERSON, 38, sits ather desk texting somebody from her phone.

MISS HENDERSONFour minute warning!

Cameron walks in holding a schedule, followed by Katie. Shelooks very timid.

MISS HENDERSON (CONTD)Hi, Cameron, right?

CAMERONYeah, nice to meet you.

MISS HENDERSONYou too! Im Miss Henderson. Youcan sit anywhere youd like.

DAN, 15, looks on from the back with an impressed smile andslaps BRYAN, 15, in the chest extremely hard without taking

his eyes off of her. Next to them is Katie and two emptydesks.

She places her backpack in one of the empty desks and herbinder on top of the other.

BRYAN(In pain, laughing)

Dammit, dude. What the hell?

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DANThat girl though!

Dan WHISTLES loudly at Cameron. She blushes and MissHenderson looks on agitated.

MISS HENDERSONNot cool, Dan! Come on...

Katie LAUGHS and rolls her eyes. Dan mean mugs her.

DANWhat are you rolling your eyes for?

KATIEYoure a pig!

DANYou wanna get slapped too?!

MISS HENDERSONDan, that isnt funny.

KATIEHe knows if he slaps me Ill kickhis ass.

MISS HENDERSONCan we all just please relax? Iknow its Monday...

DAN

It aint Sunday.

Everybody LAUGHS.

EXT. SCHOOL FOOTBALL FIELD - DAY

Peter and Andrew smoke cigarettes in a small pitiful excusefor a football field just right of the actual campus itself.

ANDREWYou wanna hear something funny?

Peter nods and takes a drag.

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ANDREW (CONTD)I hate Nicholas Cage. Like Ifucking cant stand the guy, butKatie probably hates him even moreand she loves me, and I know thatif its something she really thinks

Im into shell be supportive nomatter the amount of reluctance shemay have. Ive literally forced somany Nicholas Cage movie on her forthe past two weeks just to driveher insane.

PETERDude, just beat the shit out of herinstead. I feel like that would beway less over the line.

Andrew smiles and shakes his head.

ANDREWNext up is The Family Man.

PETERThat is so bitch...

Off in the distance stands MISS TAMARA, 41, arms crossed,smiling ear to ear as she watches Andrew and Peter smoke.

INT. ENGLISH CLASS - CONTINUED

The second bell RINGS.

TITLE CARD - First Period English / 8:15 A.M.

Miss Henderson CLAPS to get her students attention andapproaches the front of the room.

MISS HENDERSONOkay, phones away and mouths zippedshut. Before we call roll, we havea new student joining us today. Hernames Cameron.

DANIf it isnt, it should be.

MISS HENDERSONI trust you guys will treat herwith the same respect you do eachother.

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DANSo, none?

The class LAUGHS.

MISS HENDERSON

Is it seriously going to be one ofthose mornings? Are we trying toimpress the new kid with howrowdy we can be?

KATIEThey really dont treat people withrespect, Miss H. Especially girls.

DANYeah? Then why do you sit with usat lunch?

KATIECause Im dating your friend, youretard.

(Laughing)And you make me feel smarter.

Cameron CHUCKLES.

DAN(To Katie)

Thats funny, cause youre dumb ashell.

The door opens and miss Tamara lets herself in with a smile.Miss Henderson smiles back, happy to see her.

MISS TAMARAGood morning!

MISS HENDERSONMiss Tamara, how are you?

(To Cameron)Miss Tamara is the schoolsdisciplinary leader.

MISS TAMARAGreat, great, great... How are theknuckleheads treating you thismorning?

MISS HENDERSONLets just say some of them may becoming to your office to say goodmorning pretty soon.

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MISS TAMARAIs that right?

DANIll just save myself the trip andsay it now... Good morning.

MISS TAMARA(To Miss Henderson)

Speaking of knuckleheads, are youmissing a couple of them?

Miss Henderson takes a quick glance around.

MISS HENDERSONAh, yes... Peter and Andrew. Impretty sure thats a detention forPeter.

MALLORY, 15, blonde and gorgeous rolls her eyes with a smile.

MALLORYAndrew too. Thats number four thismonth.

MISS TAMARAWell regardless, youll be sendingboth of them to me right away whenthey arrive anyway. Theyre smokingcigarettes in the football field.

MALLORY

That is so gross.

MISS HENDERSON(To Miss Tamara)

Thank you.

Miss Tamara waves bye to Cameron as she goes to leave.

MISS TAMARAWelcome to Edgewood.

She leaves.

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EXT. SCHOOL FOOTBALL FIELD - DAY

Peter and Andrew put out their cigarettes.

PETEROne more?

ANDREWWere already late.

PETERExactly. Thats a tardy detentionfor me so I might as well make themost of it.

ANDREWIts a detention for me too, Ithink.

PETERIts like youre Jeff Goldbum andIm Will Smith in independence day,when theyre in the plane thatsinside the UFO thing smoking onelast cigar.

ANDREWLets go back.

Peter puts the pack of cigarettes into his pocket and the twowalk towards the campus.

ANDREW (CONTD)How do you get cigarettes anyway?

PETERWhen I have the money I have my mompull into the gas station in themorning so I can get gum. I goin, hand the guy ten dollars for afive dollar pack of smokes and tellhim to keep the change cause Imrunning late for work.

ANDREWShut up.

PETERI mean he knows. Hes not stupid.He smiles every time like he getsit, you know?

14.


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INT. ENGLISH CLASS - CONTINUED

Miss Henderson crosses her arms with a plotting smile.

MISS HENDERSONAlright, you guys want to play a

game?

DANHell yeah.

MISS HENDERSONWhat excuse will they give forbeing late? The person closest tobeing right will receive a homeworkpass.

KYLE, 15, a black skinny kid shakes his head and LAUGHS.

KYLETheyll say they were in thebathroom... Watch.

RYAN, 15, shakes his head no.

RYANNo, they were in the computer labprinting out their homework. Bonusdetail, you ready? The printerjammed and they had to wait for itto be fixed.

MALLORYYou were closer than Kyle, butyoure both wrong. These guys areidiots, okay? Theyre going to saythey were doing something reallyrespectable.

KYLEThats not vague at all...

MALLORYIts not specific enough to say

they were doing a good deed? Like,their reason will make you want toshake their hands or tell themtheyre great people.

MISS HENDERSONIll take that.

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Peter and Andrew walks in to a class full of students tryingtheir very best to hold laughter in. Cameron watches, readyto burst out laughing.

MISS HENDERSON (CONTD)And where were you guys?

PETERThis kid, man...

Mallory has a shit eating grin on her face.

PETER (CONTD)He couldnt get his locker open. Hemust have been in the sixth gradehe was so small. We had to help himout.

The entire class ERUPTS into LAUGHTER. Peter and Andrew stare

them all down like theyre crazy.

PETER (CONTD)What is so funny?

Miss Henderson goes over to her desk, pulls out three formsand begins writing on them.

PETER (CONTD)Whats that?

She finishes and approaches Peter and Andrew holding thedetention slips out for them to grab. They do, very confused.

PETER (CONTD)If you want to give us tardydetention for helping out somecrying kid, so be it.

Miss Henderson turns to Mallory and hands her a homeworkpass.

MISS HENDERSONHeres your homework pass.

MALLORYThank you.

PETERWhy does she get a homework pass?

MALLORYFor accurately guessing what excuseyou two idiots would give for beinglate.

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PETERWhat?

MISS HENDERSONRead the detention slip.

Peter and Andrew look it over. Andrew turns ghost white withfear and Peter, beat red with anger.

PETERWe werent smoking!

MISS HENDERSONGet out. Miss Tamara is waiting.

PETERWait, lets be rational for amoment. The vocab test, missHenderson... We cant miss a vocab

test.

MALLORYIts Monday, dumb ass. Honors takesvocab tests on Monday. We take themon Tuesdays.

PETER(To Miss Henderson)

Youre not gonna write her up forcalling me a dumb ass?

MISS HENDERSON

Oh, please... If I wrote each ofyou up every time you said a badword Id start getting threats fromLorax for killing so many trees.

INT. SCHOOL LOBBY - DAY

Peter and Andrew sit on a couch outside of Miss Tamarasoffice.

ANDREW

(Whispering)My mom doesnt know I smoke.

PETERThats not what youre gonna tellMiss Tamara though, now is it?

Andrew shakes his head. Its silent for a moment until theyboth LAUGH.

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Miss Tamara walks up to them with a wide smile, holding awater bottle.

MISS TAMARAGentlemen! Come on in.

They follow her into her office.

INT. MISS TAMARAS OFFICE - DAY

Peter and Andrew are seated in front of Miss Tamaras desk.She sips her water and leans back.

MISS TAMARASo, do your parents know you smoke?

PETER & ANDREWYes.

MISS TAMARAReally? As somebody who knows bothyour mothers very well, I highlydoubt that for some reason.

PETERWith all due respect, you couldntpossibly know our moms more than wedo, right?

MISS TAMARAThats a very good point, Peter.

Andrew smiles awkwardly.

MISS TAMARA (CONTD)Ill tell you what.. First off,hand me the cigarettes. Lighterstoo.

Peter hands her his cigarettes and lighter.

ANDREWI dont have a lighter.

Miss Tamara holds the cigarette pack up and examines it.

MISS TAMARAI was going to break each cigaretteone at a time and toss the lighterin the trash, but that wouldnt befair of me considering your parentsknow and accept that you smoke.Heres what Im prepared to do...

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Im going to simply set theseaside, call your parents and havethem pick these items up and dowith them as they please. Sincethey know you smoke theyllprobably simply hand them back to

you and youll puffing again in notime.

ANDREWTime out. My mom does not know Ismoke.

MISS TAMARA(Fake shock)

What?!

Peter stares Andrew down like hes a traitor.

ANDREW(To Peter)

Dont even look at me like that.

MISS TAMARAIs there a problem with how youthink Im handling this, Peter?

PETERNo mam.

MISS TAMARAAre you sure? You look kind of mad.

PETERWhy would I be mad? Im gonna bepuffing again in no time.

INT. OUTSIDE OF COMPUTER LAB - DAY

TITLE CARD- Second Period Animation / 9:01 A.M.

A small group of students wait with her backpacks outside ofa computer lab. Bryan rattles the locked door and then looks

down at his watch. Cameron is beside him waiting withwandering eyes.

Peter walks over to Bryan and shakes his head.

BRYANWhat did Miss Tamara do?

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MISS TAMARA (CONT'D)


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PETER(Laughing)

Shes calling my mom to come pickup my cigarettes.

BRYAN

Does your mom know you smoke?

PETERHell no. Where is Miss Parker?

Bryan shrugs and turns to Cameron.

BRYANDo you like animation?

PETER(Like hes stupid)

No, she doesnt like animation.

BRYANYou dont know that.

PETERBryan, nobody except for you wouldtake this elective willingly.

Cameron LAUGHS.

CAMERONI like it just fine, but I signedup for drama. It was full I guess.

PETERSee?

BRYANShe said she likes it just fine.

PETERShe was being nice.

BRYAN(To Cameron)

Its a fun elective. I mean, itseasy. Last Friday we went toUniversal Studios. Well, everybodyexcept for him.

CAMERONReally? Thats pretty cool.

Miss Parker skips over to the door with a set of keys.

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PETER(Annoyed)

Youre late.

MISS PARKERNo, Im teacher.

PETERThe teacher... You are the teacher.Jesus Christ.

MISS PARKERGod bless you.

She opens the door and students start piling in. Peter turnsto Cameron and bites his lip.

PETERI fucking hate her.

INT. COMPUTER LAB - MOMENTS LATER

Miss Parker waves two stacks of papers around like pom pomswhile grinning from ear to ear.

MISS PARKERWe have a new student joining ourvery animated class today!Please, no flash photography.

PETER

What does that even mean?

MISS PARKERIm speaking, Peter.

PETEROh, sorry. I didnt realize.

Miss Parker closes her eyes and sticks her tongue out at him.

MISS PARKERYoure probably wondering what Im

holding in my hands right now,right?

Nobody says anything.

MISS PARKER (CONTD)Well, its a pop quiz.

The class BOOS in unison.

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MISS PARKER (CONTD)Wait now, let me finish. Since youguys were so good at UniversalStudios last week I spent theweekend preparing an easy A to helpboost all your grades.

(To Cameron)Cameron, sweetie, you dont have totake it of course.

PETERSo what are we gonna do? Just sithere?

MISS PARKERWhat do you mean we, Peter?

PETERI mean I didnt go on the field

trip so I cant take it either.

MISS PARKERYoure not new here like her. Icant give everybody else a quizand not you if youve been herejust as long.

PETERBut I didnt go...

MISS PARKERIts not my fault you opted out of

having an amazing day at a themepark.

PETERIt isnt like I chose sitting in alibrary bored crazy over going to atheme park... I couldnt afford it.

MISS PARKERYou are making a milk shake out ofnothing. This is an easy A. Youwill be fine. Now Im handing the

quizzes out so no more talking.Peter rolls his eyes as he watches her hand the quizzes out.He receives his and glances over it.

He rolls his eyes and raises his hand.

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PETERHey, yeah... Question number one...Who sat next to me on JurassicPark? This has got to be a joke.How the hell am I supposed to knowthat?

MISS PARKERI said no more talking. If youdont know an answer, take aneducated guess.

PETERAn educated guess? It isnt evenmultiple choice. Question numbertwo, Where did we eat lunch at? Ithink youve really gone crazy thistime, miss Parker.

MISS PARKEROne more outburst from you, youngman and Ill deduct ten points fromyour quiz automatically.

PETERMiss Parker, if you deducted tenpoints from my quiz my final gradeon this easy A would be -10.

MISS PARKERThats it, Peter. The best you canscore is now a 90.

PETERIs that right?

Peter crumbles his quiz up into a ball and throws it at thewhite board behind her.

MISS PARKERGet out!

PETERMy pleasure.

The class LAUGHS while Cameron watches Peter leave with asympathetic smile.

Peter opens the door but stops and shakes his head.

PETER (CONTD)This class is a joke.

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MISS PARKERYoure a joke!

PETERMaybe.

He slams the door behind him. PAUL, 16, shakes his head veryconfused.

PAULI could be losing my mind here, butI could have sworn Peter sat nextto you on Jurassic Park, MissParker.

MEAGAN, 15, shakes her head at Paul.

MEAGANNo, Sarah did.

SARAH, 16, looks extremely offended.

SARAHGross, I did not.

KEVIN, 15, stares his quiz down very confused.

KEVINYo, I thought we brought our ownlunches...

Miss Parkers face turns beat red.

MISS PARKERThis is a quiz! You cannot bediscussing answers out loud likethis! This is supposed to be aneasy A!

BILLY, 15, scratches his head and puts his pencil down.

BILLYI dont know a single answer onthis thing to be honest with you.

MISS PARKERNobody sat next to me on JurassicPark! There! You have one answer!Now please, do your best on therest of them.

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INT. SCHOOL LIBRARY - DAY

Peter enters the library and takes a seat at a black table infront of a row of computers.

MISS MICHELLE, 48, stares at him like shes waiting for

something. He nods his head at her and waves.

MISS MICHELLEAre you here because you werekicked out of class?

PETERNo, I was here last Friday whilethe rest of my class was on a fieldtrip, remember? Theyre taking aquiz on it right now so I was sentto the library.

MISS MICHELLEWell, study or do homework orsomething. You cant just sitthere.

Peter SIGHS and opens his notebook. He grabs a pencil andtaps a blank sheet of line paper. He writes his name on thetop and Music appreciation under it.

He writes Mozart was super lame. And then erases it. Heputs his pencil down and stares at Miss Michelle like hesbored as hell and its her fault.

INT. ECONOMICS CLASS - DAY

Peter, Dan, Andrew, Katie, Bryan and Cameron sit near theback. Peter and Dan are sitting on top of their desks.

PETERDid you guys bring your feast food?

DANI made a whole fucking steak, dude.

KATIEShut up.

DAN(Mocking her)

Shut up.

PETER(To Andrew)

What did you bring?

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ANDREWA shit ton of mashed potatoes, you?

PETERMacaroni and cheese.

BRYANI couldnt make anything, man. Ididnt have any time.

Dan slaps Bryans chest extremely hard.

DANThen you cant have any!

BRYAN(Laughing)

Quit hitting me!

CAMERONWhats this for?

PETERLast week at lunch the junior girlshad this giant ass cookie cake andtowards the end of lunch a coupleseventh or eighth graders asked fora slice cause it was nowhere neardone--

DANAnd they said

(Shouting)Get-tha-fuck-outta-here!

Mallory turns to face them with a look of utter hatred.

MALLORYCan you shut up? Some of us aretrying to do some last minutestudying.

PETERFor what?

MALLORYUh, the economics test today?

FRANCES, 15, rubs her temple completely defeated whileflipping through her textbook.

FRANCESChapter five and six... Its goingto be a nightmare.

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PETERWell, shit. We cant take thistoday.

MALLORYYes we can...

PETERDoes anybody else besides Mallorywant to take this today?

PRETTY MUCH EVERYONE ELSENo.

MALLORY(To the entire class)

Think about this for a moment. Someof us, myself included actuallystudied for this thing. I dont

know about you but I personallylike taking tests promptly whilethe material is still fresh in myhead.

ANDREWIts just you, buddy.

MALLORYWhat do you think, Dan?

Dan looks at her like shes crazy.

DANWhat are you turning to me for? Ididnt study for the damn thing.

Mallory rolls her eyes, disappointed.

MALLORY(To Peter)

How the hell would you prevent thetest from happening anyway?

PETER

Just let me try and dont stop me.Worst comes to worst in yourtwisted fucking head you get anextra night to study.

Mallory turns around and shakes her head.

MALLORYWhatever.

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The bell RINGS.

TITLE CARD- Third Period Economics / 9:55 A.M.

MR. BYRON, 53, tall and skinny with short grey hair and apermanent smile and fixes his eyes immediately on Cameron,excited.

MR. BYRONWell hello there!

Cameron blushes.

CAMERONHi, Im Cameron.

MR. BYRONYeah, Im Byron Sandow or Mr.Byron...

PETERMr. Byron, we need to have a talk,man.

MR. BYRONOh?

PETER

Yeah see, I guess some teachersfail to grasp the fact that eachclass has their designated testingday. Youre the only one whodoesnt veer from the scheduledday...

KATIEAnd on this particular day we havefive tests.

PETER

Five...MR. BYRON

Five tests on a Monday?

ANDREWYoure the only hope we have forsomebody cutting us a break.

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Mr. Bryans eyes peer over to his book shelf as he pondersthings for a moment.

MR. BYRONWell, I have Braveheart.

PETERMaybe we can watch Braveheart andthen take the test in a couple dayswhen its over?

Mallory stares at Mr. Byron absolutely speechless.

MALLORYBraveheart... In Economics class.

MR. BYRONWe can do that. I dont want youguys overburdened.

INT. ECONOMICS CLASS - LATER

The lights are off and Braveheart plays in the background.Cameron turns to face Peter.

CAMERON(Whispering)

So about the feast thing.

PETER(Whispering)

Oh right, so the junior girls hadthat cake they didnt finish andsome eighth graders asked for apiece and they basically told themto fuck off, so we decided weregonna prepare a shit ton of foodfor lunch today and offer it toeverybody but them.

Cameron LAUGHS.

PETER (CONTD)

Well eat what we eat and thenthrow the rest out in a trash canright in front of them.

INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY - DAY

Bryan approaches Peter with a nervous smile.

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BRYANCan I talk to you for a second?

PETERWhats up?

BRYANCan we keep this between us?

PETERSure...

BRYANYou know how last year you wantedSarah and we all knew that so welet you do your thing and you twoended up dating?

PETER

Yeah, she was crazy but if you wanther go for it.

BRYANNo, thats not what I mean... Likeand this year Andrew and Katiefinally started dating, which Imean come on, its about time. Theywere only flirting with each othersince the seventh grade, but nobodyelse made a move because we knewAndrew wanted her.

PETERRight...

BRYANCould I maybe call dibs on Cameron?

PETERSDibs?

BRYANYeah, I mean that sort of sounds--

PETERShitty.

BRYANYeah, but I dont mean it in ashitty way. I just really like her.

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PETERYou dont even know her, man. Imean she seems cool and shes cutebut --

BRYAN

Which is why I figured you know,since none of us know her-know heryet I could kind of raise my handand say Let me try to win this oneover without anyone disputing orcaring.

PETERI just dont understand what youwant from me.

BRYANI just dont want you going after

her I guess. I never put myself outthere usually. My focus iselsewhere, but I got this feeling,I dont know.

PETERIm not flirting with her, man.

BRYANNo, I know. I just wanted you toknow that Im gonna go for it withthis girl and see what happens.

PETER(Laughing)

Congratulations.

BRYANThis was kind of dumb. Tell anyoneand Ill kill you.

PETERI may already kill myself afterthis awkward conversation.

INT. SPANISH CLASS - DAY

TITLE CARD- Fourth Period Spanish / 11:25 A.M.

MRS. OTERO, 36, short and cute with long black hair stands infront of the class with a mischievous smile.

Peter, Cameron, Bryan and Andrew sit in the back.

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MRS. OTEROWe are feeling rambunctious today,ci? I have a wonderful idea. Thenext student to talk or laugh getsa sorpresa.

Peter turns to Cameron.

PETER(Whispering )

What does sorpresa mean?

MRS. OTEROPedro! Come here.

PETERI was just asking what sorpresameans.

MRS. OTERORapido, come.

Peter stands up and approaches her.

MRS. OTERO (CONTD)(Excited)

Sorpresa means surprise!

PETEROh good, can I sit back down now?

MRS. OTERO

No, Pedro. What do you think yoursorpresa should be?

PETERI would be incredibly sorpresad towalk away not punished. That wouldbe a sorpresa.

MRS. OTEROUn momento.

She walks to her desk and pulls out paper and a pen.

PETERUn detention isnt verysorpressing, Senora Otero.

MRS. OTERONo detention, un momento.

She writes something as the rest of the class watches with asmile.

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She puts the phone down and hands him the paper.

MRS. OTERO (CONTD)(Pointing to the phone)

Telefono.

PETERTelefono?

MRS. OTEROCi.

ANDREWIt means phone.

Peter glares at him.

PETERI know.

Peter approaches the phone while he reads the paper tohimself. Mrs. Otero turns to Cameron with a smile.

MRS. OTEROI dont believe in sending studentsto the office or calling theirparents because I feel like whentheyre in situations like thatthey become master cons... Oh,Mrs. Otero thought it was metalking but it was actually thestudent next to me. You see what

Im saying?

Cameron nods with a CHUCKLE.

MRS OTERO(To Peter)

Pedro, call your madre and readfrom that paper.

The class erupts in LAUGHTER and excitement.

MRS. OTERO

(To the class)Silencio or youll be next.

Peter sighs and picks up the phone. Mrs. Otero walks over andpats him on the back.

MRS. OTERO (CONTD)Here, Ill dial for you. I know hernumber.

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She dials the number and hits the speaker button. Peter lookson incredibly embarrassed as it rings loudly.

PETERS MOM (OVER SPEAKER)Hello?

PETERHey, hows it going?

PETERS MOM (OVER SPEAKER)Who am I speaking with? Im sorry.

The class LAUGHS.

PETERIts Peter.

PETERS MOM (OVER SPEAKER)Peter? Shouldnt you be in class?

PETERI am, listen...

(Reading from paper)The reason Im calling you is tolet you know that Im in Spanishand cant seem to stop disruptingclass.

PETERS MOM (OVER SPEAKER)Are you kidding me?

PETER

I wish I was.

PETERS MOM (OVER SPEAKER)You need to get your shit together,okay? We go through this everynight --

Mrs. Otero grabs the phone and turns off the speaker with aLAUGH while tears stream down the eyes from Peters peersfrom laughing so hard.

MRS. OTERO

Mrs. Hanson, how are you? This isMrs. Otero.(Beat)

Im great, thank you!

Peter watches while shaking his head and running his handthrough his hair.

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MRS. OTERO (CONTD)(Laughing)

Pedro is just extremely hyper todayand doesnt want to stop talking. Iexplained the next person to speakwould be in trouble and he was the

first to challenge me.(Beat)Okay, one moment.

She rests the phone on her shoulder and smiles at Peter.

MRS. OTERO (CONTD)Your mother says youre grounded.

PETEROh, sweet. Thats really cool. Imglad I exist right now.

MONTAGE - VARIOUS

Jimmy Eat World - Let It Happen plays as...

A) INT. TEACHERS LOUNGE - DAY - Peter retrieves his largecontainer of macaroni and cheese from the fridge in theteachers lounge.

B) EXT. EDGEWOOD HIGH SCHOOL - DAY - Dan walks over to ablack SUV parked outside and is handed a container with Steakfrom his mother.

C) INT. MISS HENDERSONS CLASSROOM - DAY - Andrew and Katie

stand over Miss Hendersons desk as she opens a mini fridgeunderneath her desk and hands them a container of Mashedpotatoes and a box of Publix chicken wings.

D) INT. SCHOOL CAFETERIA - DAY - Everybody at lunch watchesas Peter, Cameron, Bryan, Andrew, Katie and Dan lay out theirfood, plates, forks and spoons. The GIRLS AT THE JUNIORTABLE look confused.

E) INT. SCHOOL CAFETERIA - LATER - DAY - Students rangingfrom the seventh grade all the way to twelfth chow down fullof enjoyment, surrounding the feast lunch table. A girl at

the junior lunch table raises her eye brow with disgust.F) One at a time in a line, Peter, Dan, Andrew and Katiethrow their left overs away into a trash can directly besidethe juniors.

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INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY - DAY

Cameron stands by Peters locker with a smile.

CAMERONThat was fun. I really like it

here.

PETERAre you stuffed?

CAMERONIncredibly. I dont think Ive everbeen this full in my entire life.

PETER(Laughing)

Do you have science next?

CAMERONNo, honors history and thenscience.

PETERWell, shit. What do you have lastperiod?

CAMERON(Laughing)

Music Appreciation?

PETER

Really? I take that too. I feellike its this schools hidden gem.

CAMERONWhat is it exactly?

PETERIts literally the most pointlessclass you could ever take, but Mr.Matts fucking awesome. Its noteven in the actual campus. Its inthe portable buildings in the back.

Bryan approaches them and rests his hand on a locker door.

BRYAN(To Cameron)

You ready to go to class?

Cameron shoots him a smile and nods.

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CAMERONYeah, sure.

(To Peter)Ill see you in music appreciation.

PETER

Yeah, sounds good.

INT. HONORS HISTORY CLASS - DAY

TITLE CARD- Fifth Period Honors History / 12:45 P.M.

MR. DALY, 35, stands in front of his class putting the lid ona marker. Theres a wall of notes on the white board behindhim.

MR. DALYSince we finished early Im gonna

let you guys spend the remainder ofthe period working on your groupprojects.

(To Cameron)Cameron, why dont you work withMallory and Lindsay... I knowyoure new here but maybe they canget you up to speed with what weredoing and go from there.

CAMERONOkay, sure.

Students begin turning their desks around to match up withtheir partners.

MALLORY(To Cameron)

I never really properly introducedmyself. Im Mallory.

LINDSAYAnd Im Lindsay, with an A.

CAMERON

Yeah, nice to meet you.MALLORY

So what do you think of Edgewood sofar?

CAMERONI like it. Its different, I dontknow.

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MALLORY(To Lindsay)

Shes in a lot of standard classes,like me.

LINDSAY

Oh, the circus.

MALLORYMhm..

LINDSAY(To Cameron)

What brought you here in the middleof the year, if you dont mind measking?

CAMERONMy dad got a real good job offer

that was pretty short notice.

LINDSAYWhered you move here from?

CAMERONTampa, just two hours away.

LINDSAYOh wow, so not too far but notclose enough to be able to staywhere you were school wise.

CAMERONExactly.

LINDSAYYour friends must have been bummed.

CAMERONYeah, but I dont know... I didntreally have a real tight core groupof friends.

Mallory smiles at her in a plotting sort of way.

MALLORYWell be your friend!

CAMERONId like that, thanks.

MALLORYCan I maybe offer you some advice?

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CAMERONYeah, sure...

MALLORYPeter, Andrew and them are funnyand clever I suppose but they

will... Whats the word?

LINDSAYDrag you down?

MALLORYYes!

(To Cameron)Theres like, good influence andthen theres bad. If you hangaround them before you know it yourgrades will start slipping, yourtardys will stack up and your

conduct will falter big time. Now,Im not telling you what to do...

CAMERONNo, of course not... Youre justtrying to be helpful.

MALLORYExactly.

Cameron looks as though shes trying to hide the awkwardnessshes feeling.

CAMERONShould we go over the project?

LINDSAYOh, its done! Well strap yourname to it and say you helped out.

MALLORYYeah, we got you, girl.

INT. HISTORY CLASS - LATER

TITLE CARD- Sixth Period Standard History / 1:45 P.M.

Mr. Daly now stands in front of the standard class,scratching his head. Peter, Andrew, Katie and Dan are seatednear each other.

MR. DALYSo how are your projects comingalong?

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DANOh, theyre coming.

MR. DALYDoes anyone have anything to show?

Nobody says anything.

MR. DALY (CONTD)I feel like you guys havent evencommitted 25 percent of yourefforts to getting this done. Thereare groups in the honors class thatare finished already.

PETERWell, thats why theyre honors andwere not.

MR. DALY(To Peter)

Man, I was just like you in highschool. The world was my stage andI was its comedian.

(To everybody)I was just like a lot of you...They tell you in the fifth gradethat middle schools the real deal,that its so much more intense. Inmiddle school they say the samething about high school. I saw noreal difference personally. I was a

clown, and the things I got awaywith in middle school I mostcertainly got away with in highschool as well. I didnt realizethat I was misinterpreting whatthey meant by what they weresaying. By real deal and way moreintense they were referring towhats behind the curtain....Transcripts... Your resume for yourfuture.

All eyes are on Mr. Daly as he CHUCKLES like hes baffled.MR. DALY (CONTD)

Man, I was going to school to be ateacher and youd think I was goingto be a doctor I had it so bad. Ihad to re-learn everything I blewoff over the years.

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42/49

My grades in high school were crapand I never did anything extracurricular to stand out in apersonal way. Guess what? You cantput I made my peers laughhysterically every day on a

college application. You cant.(Beat)But Mr. Daly, theres communitycolleges. I dont need to beaccepted at Harvard to continue myeducation. Yeah, but thats a fivepercent way of thinking and if youlive your life based off aphilosophy like that you willstruggle each second you breatheuntil the day that you die.

He shakes his head and wipes his forehead.

MR. DALY (CONTD)I could Glengarry Glen Ross youguys until Im blue in the face butthe sad fact of the matter is, nomatter how passionate I preach howI feel on this or any issue itsgoing to go through one ear and outthe other. I refuse to give up andstop trying though. When you signup to become a teacher youre notdoing it for millions of dollars.If youre genuine about your

passion youre doing it because youtruly want to make a difference.You have it stuck in your headsthat teachers only likes the kidwho has straight As and doesnttalk back or act out of line, butto generalize teachers and saythose are the only students theycare about grinds me more thananything else in this world.

(Beat)Do those kind of students give us

less of a headache? Absolutely, butthey dont need a specific personto guide them in the rightdirection. I could teach themhistory and theyd get it, butanybody could teach them historyand theyd get it.

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MR. DALY (CONTD)

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43/49

Its the students that make upexcuses and dont apply themselvesthat present us with a realopportunity to change somebodyslife. You guys act like your hardas a rock... A bunch of bad asses,

but just you watch. As time passesquicker by the day and you continueputting off giving this thingcalled education a hundred percentof your dedication youll findyourselves tossing and turning,wondering what youre going to dowith your lives. Youre gonna bescared and youre gonna want toreach out to your teachers for helpbut youre gonna feel embarrassedand youre gonna try to convinceyourselves that its too late.

Ill do my best to teach you all Ican but Im waiting for that daybecause I want you to know youshouldnt feel embarrassed and Iwill be here, when youre ready tohelp you push through because it isnever too late.

The bell RINGS. Nobody moves.

MR. DALY (CONTD)You ever hear that expressionLifes a roller coaster ride?

Well, all rides eventually stop soask yourselves what ride you wanthop on next and if youre in aposition to be able to make thatdecision and not have it makeitself.

INT. MUSIC APPRECIATION CLASS - DAY

Peter and Cameron are sitting next to each other. Sheslooking around at the different students that make up their

class. They range from the 8th grade all the way up to 11th.CAMERON

So this is like a multi-gradeclass?

PETERIts like a -- Yeah, its sort ofan anything goes mad house.

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MR. DALY (CONTD)


44/49

Mr. Matt enters and walks over to his tiny desk. He looksreally nervous.

PETER (CONTD)(To Mr. Matt)

Is everything okay?

Mr. Matt SIGHS.

MR. MATTEverything is fine.

PETERThis is Cameron --

MR. MATTI know. Hi.

ANTHONY, 14, smiles at Mr. Matt very confused and then turns

to Peter and LAUGHS.

ANTHONYWhats with him today?

Peter shrugs and KEVIN, 14, enters the room. Kevin is shortand Hispanic with a cocky smile that says I rule thisworld. He immediately notices Cameron and nods like heapproves.

KEVINWhos the new blood?

CAMERONCameron...

KEVINIf it isnt it should be.

She turns to Peter and LAUGHS.

CAMERONDan said that same exact thing thismorning.

KEVIN(To Mr. Matt)Mr. Matt, did you miss me onFriday?

ANTHONYWe played basketball specificallybecause you werent here.

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KEVINIs that true, mr. Matt? You breakmy heart, man.

The bell RINGS.

TITLE CARD- Seventh Period Music Appreciation / 2:10 P.M.

MR. MATTSo who did their homework?

PETER(Whispering)

Shit.

CAMERON(Whispering)

What?

PETER(Whispering)

I forgot. He reminded me and Iforgot again. I was gonna do it inthe library earlier but I blew itoff.

ANTHONYNot me.

KEVINI wasnt here so...

ANTHONY(Laughing)

Like you would have done it anyway.

KEVINWell never know, will we?

THREE STUDENTS out of eight raise their hands.

MR. MATTJust three of you, huh?

He looks directly at Peter who mouths the words Im sorrywith an awkward smile.

MR. MATT (CONTD)Yeah, Im sorry too...

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From behind a blue cabinet in the back of the room pops outmiss Tamara.

ANTHONYWhat the heck?

MISS TAMARA(To Mr. Matt)So whos safe?

Kevin drums his desk with his hands.

KEVINIts about to get real!

MR. MATTJust Kristen, Sam and Kevin Isuppose. And the new girl, butshes new so...

PETERWhats going on?

ANTHONYHes a traitor!

MISS TAMARALast week I was talking to Mr. Mattand this class got brought up, byme and not him. I asked how it wasgoing and I was informed things area bit chaotic. 90 percent of you

are currently failing.

ANTHONYIsnt it usually the teachers faultwhen something like that happens?

Miss Tamara stares at him expressionless.

ANTHONY (CONTD)Ill shut up now.

MISS TAMARA

The four of you who didnt do yourhomework are gonna take a littlefield trip with me to my office.Kevin, you too.

KEVINWhat the heck did I do? I wasnteven here on Friday.

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MISS TAMARAIn the few minutes Ive been here Ican already tell youre a huge partof the problem.

(To everybody)Come on, lets go... Its not the

end of the world. Youve all beenin my office plenty of timesbefore.

They all stand up. Miss Tamara stops Peter with a smile.

MISS TAMARA (CONTD)Not you, Peter. Youre goingdirectly to Mr. Connors office.

PETERWhat? Why?

MISS TAMARAIve already dealt with you thismorning. Were not going to havethe same conversation twice in oneday. You cant get your craptogether today so youre gonna gosee the principal.

Peter stares wide eyed at the floor with his mouth half open.

MISS TAMARA (CONTD)You people are acting like youvenever been in trouble before. You

know how this works... Youshouldnt be surprised at all.

EXT. EDGEWOOD HIGH SCHOOL - DAY

TITLE CARD- After School / 3:05 P.M.

Yo La Tengo - I Feel Like Going Home plays as...

An army of students pile out the lobby doors, flooding theoutside entrance as they socialize and go to their cars.

Andrew and Katie LAUGH as they approach Andrews moms car.Katie opens the back door to get in but is shoved out of theway by Andrew who tries getting in first. She grabs hiscollar and throws him aside and jumps in.

ELSEWHERE

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49/49

CAMERONWaiting for you.

Peter CHUCKLES.

PETER

You didnt have to.

CAMERON(Sarcastic)

I didnt?

They both smile. He turns to face the door and looks confusedas Andrew rushes in looking angry and upset.

PETER(Concerned)

Whats up?

Andrew cocks his head back as if to notion for Peter to lookbehind him. ANDREWs MOM, 46, and Katie enter. Peter turnsthe opposite direction and sees miss Tamara handing PETERSMOM, 45, a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.

PETER (CONTD)Oh shit, I forgot...

THE END

48.

Edgewood Pilot First Draft

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