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 GUIDANCE FOR SCHOOL PERSONNEL: STUDENTS WHO HAD A LOVED ONE DIE IN THE EARTHQUAKE July 2008 About the National Child Traumatic Stress Network Established by Congress in 2000, the National Child Traumatic Stress Network (NCTSN) is a unique collaboration of academic and community-based service centers whose mission is to raise the standard of care and increase access to services for traumatized children and their families across the United States. Combining knowledge of child development, expertise in the full range of child traumatic experiences, and attention to cultural perspectives, the NCTSN serves as a national resource for developing and disseminating evidence-based interventions, trauma-informed services, and public and professional education.
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Disaster Materials for Public-School Educators

Apr 08, 2018

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GUIDANCE FOR

SCHOOL PERSONNEL:

STUDENTS WHO HAD A LOVED ONE

DIE IN THE EARTHQUAKE

July 2008

About the National Child Traumatic Stress Network

Established by Congress in 2000, the National Child Traumatic Stress Network (NCTSN) is a unique collaboration of 

academic and community-based service centers whose mission is to raise the standard of care and increase access to

services for traumatized children and their families across the United States. Combining knowledge of child

development, expertise in the full range of child traumatic experiences, and attention to cultural perspectives, the

NCTSN serves as a national resource for developing and disseminating evidence-based interventions, trauma-informed

services, and public and professional education.

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GUIDANCE FOR SCHOOL PERSONNEL:

STUDENTS WHO HAD A LOVED ONE DIE IN THE EARTHQUAKE 

Introduction to trauma

The earthquake was a terrifying disaster for adults, children, families, and communities. The

extreme life threat, destruction, injury, and loss of life made this experience especially traumatic.

While struggling for their own survival, many saw friends, family, co-workers, and neighbors

seriously injured or die. During such an event, children and adults often feel intense fear,

helplessness, and horror. These feelings can keep coming back for a long time afterwards. When

a trauma causes the death of a loved one, children and adolescents may experience traumatic

grief , where grieving and mourning are made more difficult, and it becomes hard for them to

remember the person they lost without also thinking or picturing how the person died.

Reactions to the trauma and loss are likely to show up in children’s behavior at school, andteachers can play an important role in the recovery of their students. By better understanding 

students’ reactions, teachers can be prepared to provide appropriate support within the school

setting. By being informed about trauma, teachers and staff will be better able to assist students

with current school functioning and prevent future difficulties.

How do children and teens react to trauma and loss?

Children and teens react to trauma and loss in different ways. Their disaster experience, level of 

understanding, ability to handle difficult emotions, and ways of coping will differ according to the

age of the child, temperament, and other life experiences or emotional problems. Caregivers,

family, peers, school, and community all contribute to how children and adolescents react and

recover. Many children recover after a brief period of difficulty. Others may continue to have

problems, while some become worse over time. A traumatic experience and the death of someone important may affect children’s sense of safety, trust in the ability of others to provide

protection, reliance on the security of loving relationships, emerging confidence in self-care

including handling danger, and sense of life as fair and controllable.

Children’s understanding of death changes as they develop and is influenced by family, religious,

and cultural values, such as the following:

•  Pre-school children may not understand that a death is permanent, and expect the person

to return.

•  School-age children may understand the physical reality of death, butin longing for the

return of a lost loved onemay experience feelings of their presence.

•  Adolescents may keep acting “young” and in need of a deceased parent, or minimize theloss and try to “grow up too fast.”

When there is no physical confirmation of the death, as occurred after the earthquake where so

many bodies were not soon recovered, the above reactions can be much more intense and long-

lasting.

Guidance for School Personnel:

Students Who Had a Loved One Die in the Earthquake

The National Child Traumatic Stress Network

www.NCTSN.org 

1

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Guidance for School Personnel:

Students Who Had a Loved One Die in the Earthquake

The National Child Traumatic Stress Network

www.NCTSN.org 

2

A loss can impact a young person in different ways at different stages in his/her life. A toddler

whose caregiver died will be affected by the change of caregiver and disruption to daily routine. A

school-age child loses not only a caregiver, but also continuing emotional support and daily help

with schoolwork and outside activities. A teenager, who was becoming independent when a

caregiver died, may be torn between a sense of responsibility to surviving family members and

the wish for greater independence.

When a loved one has died in a way that has been traumatic, a child or teen is at risk for

developing childhood traumatic grief , in which common reactions may interfere with a child’s

ability to have positive memories and engage in activities that would be helpful for adjusting to

life without the person.

There are certain general reactions and responses that are common following a disaster such as

an earthquake. It is not unusual for children and teens who suffer a traumatic loss to have

difficulties afterwards in the following areas:

•  Thoughts

o  confusion

o  problems with concentration, memory, attentiono  thinking that they should have done something to prevent the death

o  thinking that someone else close to them may die

•  Feelings

o  fear, anxiety, or worry about one’s own safety or the safety of others

o  helplessness, lack of control

o  sadness, depression, hopelessness, loneliness

o  anger, irritability

o  guilt, shame, insecurity

o  being overwhelmed

•  Physical reactions

o  fatigue

o  stomachache, headache

o  rapid heart beat, shakiness

o  other physical complaints

•  Behaviors

o  fighting, having tantrums

o  clinging, refusing to separate or be alone

o  disinterest in usual activities

o  poor hygiene or self care

o  avoiding or withdrawing from others or activities

o  changing pattern of, or having problems with eating and sleeping 

o  poor school performance

o  acting out, engaging in risky behavior

o  other unusual change in behavior

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Guidance for School Personnel:

Students Who Had a Loved One Die in the Earthquake

The National Child Traumatic Stress Network

www.NCTSN.org 

3

•  Reactions to reminders

o  Trauma reminders: Places, situations, people, sights, smells, or sounds related to the

death, including hearing a crash resembling collapsing buildings, hearing screaming,

or seeing rubble.

o  Loss reminders: People, places, objects, situations, thoughts, or memories, such as

an empty chair at the dining table or in the classroom.

o  Change reminders: Situations, people, places, or things that are reminders of how life

has changed, such as moving in with relatives or a having a new teacher replace a

teacher who died.

What is posttraumatic stress disorder?

Posttraumatic stress disorder refers to a particular group of reactions that occurs at least one

month following a trauma. The three general types of symptoms include:

•  Re-experiencing : A kind of reliving the event, including having recurrent upsetting thoughts,

repeated distressing nightmares, orin young childrenrepetitive play about the event. For

example, a child may play repeatedly by building a tower out of blocks, knocking it down, then

building it back up only to knock it down again.

•  Hyperarousal: Being hyper alerton the lookout for dangerwhile at the same time being nervous, jumpy, agitated, irritable, angry, or having an increased startle reaction. For example,

a child may feel her heart racing upon hearing a sound that resembles collapsing buildings or

when a floor shakes.

•  Avoidance/withdrawal: Avoiding thoughts, feelings, or places that remind the child of the

trauma, including withdrawing from or becoming disinterested in activities, or becoming 

emotionally distant. For example, a teen may refuse to participate in a team activity at school

after members of the team have died.

What is the grieving process?

There is no right or wrong way to grieve; nor is there an appropriate length of time to mourn a

death. Different children grieve in different ways, and the process changes as a child grows older

and faces new experiences. A child, who as a toddler lost a brother, may have new questions

about the death as he grows older. A girl, who as a child lost her mother, may have a new sense

of longing for her as she becomes a teenager. Over time, it is helpful if children can:

•  Accept the reality and permanence of the death.

•  Cope with the painful emotions related to the death, such as sadness, anger, confusion, and

guilt.

•  Adjust to changes in their lives and in their identity that result from the death.

•  Develop new relationships or deepen existing relationships to help them cope with difficulties

and loneliness.

•  Maintain a continuing healthy attachment to the person through reminiscing, remembering, or

creating a memorial.

•  Make meaning of the death, including understanding the significance of the loss.

•  Be able to have positive memories and engage in activities that help with adjustment to life

without the loved one.

•  Continue with normal developmental tasks and activities.

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Guidance for School Personnel:

Students Who Had a Loved One Die in the Earthquake

The National Child Traumatic Stress Network

www.NCTSN.org 

4

What are the signs a child or teen is having difficulty with childhood traumatic grief?

When a child is struggling with childhood traumatic grief, even happy thoughts about the person

who died may lead to upsetting memories. When traumatic or loss reminders occur, the child may

repeatedly focus on the distressing aspects of the death and not proceed through the normal

grief process. The grieving process can be further complicated if the child’s own life was in

danger.

A young person having difficulty with the grief process may:

•  Have intrusive memories about the death, which occur unexpectedly or appear as nightmares.

•  Feel guilty about how the person died.

•  Avoid unpleasant thoughts, feelings, and reminders, by skipping school, staying away from the

sites of collapsed buildings, or refusing to play a game he had enjoyed with a deceased parent.

•  Withdraw emotionallyappearing numb or having no feelingsas a way to manage upsetting 

feelings.

There can be long lasting effects when a child’s post-trauma/loss reactions are not addressed. An

adolescent may develop serious problems with depression, abuse alcohol or drugs, or have other

mental health difficulties later in life. When grief issues continue for months, or become intense

or frequent enough to interfere with a young person’s ability to go to school, enjoy friends,

participate in activities, and engage in typical child behavior, caregivers should consult a mental

health professional.

Who is at risk for difficulty?

With nurturing support over weeks and months, many children and teens will find their fears,

sadness, and distress decreasing, and they will gradually engage in more typical, age-appropriate

activities. Others, however, may continue to suffer. Children more at risk for having problems and

requiring extra attention are those who have the following:

•  Previous traumas or deaths

•  Prior physical, emotional, or learning problems

•  Caregivers who have difficulty adjusting 

•  Limited or less support from friends, family, and other adults

•  Additional stresses related to changes and loss of home or school

What issues are particular to the school setting?

The students, as well as the entire school community, are still adjusting to the devastation and

death caused by the earthquake. Many school personnel in the affected areas have been

displaced and/or have been injured themselves. Many are grieving for their lost family members,

fellow teachers and staff, or students who died or had to move elsewhere. Issues for schools

include:

•  School community

o  The school building may have been damaged and will be a reminder of events and a

trigger for unpleasant reactions.

o  The composition of school personnel may have changed, leaving adults and students

feeling upset.

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Guidance for School Personnel:

Students Who Had a Loved One Die in the Earthquake

The National Child Traumatic Stress Network

www.NCTSN.org 

5

o  Peers who have been lost or relocated will no longer be available for support and new,

relocated students will change the classroom composition.

o  Group or social activities may have changed or ended.

o  The school community may need to establish new methods and new support systems to

return to its former level of functioning.

•  School personnel

o  Staff may be struggling with their own reactions and symptoms of trauma and grief; they

may not work as effectively as they did or may be less available to students than they

were before.

o  Staff may feel burdened by the added demands of a changed classroom and students

experiencing a range of responses.

o  Teachers may find that certain subjects they have taught, on topics related to rocks or

earth, may now stir up distressing or painful memories and reactions.

•  Students

o  During the school day, students may experience reminders, express grief-related

reactions, or display other symptoms. It is important to remember that these responsesmay be associated with the students’ experiences of the earthquake, so that problems

are identified and handled correctly. A tired student may not be getting enough sleep

because she is having nightmares. A student who appears to be daydreaming may be

having distressing thoughts. A student avoiding participation in an after school club may

be upset that a new coach has replaced one who died. An angry student may be mourning 

a classmate. A student with incomplete homework may be spending all his extra time

rebuilding his home.

o  Teachers and staff may observe specific symptoms and reactions that suggest difficulty.

They might see students engaging in repetitive play or notice that art projects have

themes or images related to the earthquake or to death. Some students may be pre-

occupied with talking about or asking questions about details of the event.

How can school personnel help a student?

School personnel play a very important role in observing students, understanding how to create a

supportive school environment, and identifying when a student needs to be referred for additional

help. Here are some suggestions for educators:

•  Be aware of the common reactions described above.

•  Remember that not all children will develop childhood traumatic grief; for those who do have

difficulty, expect to see a variety of reactions.

•  If you have concerns about a student, share important and appropriate information with other

staff about him or her.

•  Maintain normal school routines and a predictable schedule as much as possible. Create a

supportive environment, taking time to prepare students for changes.

•  Provide an atmosphere of safety, normalcy, and fun. It is helpful to encourage participation in

social and extracurricular activities.

•  Try to provide a place in school with a nurse or counselor, where students can go for help and

find someone to talk with.

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Guidance for School Personnel:

Students Who Had a Loved One Die in the Earthquake

The National Child Traumatic Stress Network

www.NCTSN.org 

6

•  Listen carefully to a student’s concerns. Try to be open and calm. Do not force students to talk

about their fears or thoughts; rather, let them know you are available if they wish to share

what’s on their mind.

•  Answer students’ questions honestly, providing clear information tailored to their age. Be

prepared for some students to request information repeatedly. It is not harmful for staff to

admit that they don’t know an answer.

•  Be flexible. Modify assignments and testing to help students who are having more difficulty.

•  Adjust presentation of topics when necessary; for example, lessons in science might include

accurate information about cyclones.

•  Use teaching strategies that promote concentration, retention, and recall to increase control

and performance. It may be helpful to outline the content of presentations before beginning,

break new or complicated information into small segments, or provide handouts of material

being discussed.

•  Monitor students’ performance for signs that a student is having problems or falling behind.

•  Understand that anger or regressive behavior may be part of the child’s or teen’s reaction to a

traumatic death. Help the student feel safe and, if necessary, seek additional help.

•  Help students be sensitive to each other’s distress and support each other in positive ways.For example, encourage students to include each other in play, monitor teasing, educate

students about peers’ need for quiet time, pair students for activities so that all students are

included.

•  Be alert to students who are feeling overly responsible; reassure students they are not to

blame for the event or death.

•  Help students develop and use their own coping skills, such as talking to a trusted adult or

enjoying pleasant activities like playing with friends, reading for pleasure, singing, dancing, or

doing art.

•  For those who are able or interested, involve students in school or community activities that

help others.

•  Be a role model, by dealing appropriately with your own upset feelings.

•  Build a caring, supportive relationship with students and be available to assist families with

their concerns.

•  Monitor and attend to your own reactions. Be aware of personal distress that might make it

more difficult to work with students. Network with colleagues, seek out support of family or

friends, and keep yourself in good health.

•  Refer students needing additional helpthose having significant problems with school work,

showing signs of depression or acting out behaviors, or having continued intense upsetting 

reactionsto school professionals and counselors.

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Coping With Disasters/Traumatic WorldEvents

Emotional reactions to traumatic world events are normal. It is not uncommon to experience

distress following an event, even when you are not directly affected. Most people manage with

the support of family, friends and others in their communities. Others may feel overwhelmed

and unable to cope and need additional help and support.

Disasters can cause us to re-experience feelings and memories related to previous disasters, such

as the events of 9/11. In addition, other grief and loss experiences may resurface. The emotional

impact that a disaster has varies from person to person. Reactions to disasters are impacted by

individual beliefs, customs and cultural traditions. While those directly affected are more likely to

need additional mental health support, it is not uncommon for individuals living thousands of miles

away to experience stress and anxiety.

Five important things that you need to know are:

•  What are normal reactions to a disaster? 

•  What can I do to cope better? 

•  How can I help my children? 

•  How do I know when to ask for help? 

•  Where can I get help if I need it? 

Normal Reactions The following are predictable reactions to traumatic events and are considered normal short-term

responses to an overwhelmingly stressful event.

•  A sense of hopelessness about the future.

•  Feeling helpless, frustrated, angry and irritable.

•  Feeling anxious and afraid.

•  Having difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep.

•  Having trouble concentrating.

•  Experiencing distressing dreams or memories of this disaster or previous events.

If you feel that your reactions are lasting too long, getting worse instead of better or interfering withyour ability to function, you may want to consider seeking professional support.

Healthy Coping

•  Talk about your feelings and thoughts with family, friends and others in your community when

you are ready. This may reduce their intensity and help you feel less uncomfortable. You may also

find that your loved ones are experiencing similar feelings and you are not alone.

•  Support and comfort one another in ways you find helpful.

•  Pay close attention to your physical health - keep medical appointments, get enough rest and

exercise, eat nutritious meals, practice deep breathing, engage in fun and enjoyable activities, be

gentle with yourself and take time to appreciate the joy and beauty in your life.

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•  You may want to consider a donation to a relief organization as a way of contributing to the

recovery effort. Information about how to donate to relief organizations can be found by clicking on

the link below.

http://nyc.gov/html/fund/html/home/home.shtml

•  Avoid too much sugar, caffeine, alcohol and other substances - including overmedicating with

prescription and over the counter drugs.

Children

•  Reassure your children concerning their safety. Help them to understand how they are

protected.

•  Answer their questions as honestly as you can. Remember that children interpret things

differently than adults do. They may need help to put things into perspective.

•  Avoid overexposure to the disaster by limiting the amount of television your children watch.

•  Click on the link below for more information about how to help your children cope.

http://www.aacap.org/publications/factsfam/disaster.htm 

When To Ask For Help

The time to ask for help varies from person to person. You may want to consider requesting

professional support if:

•  Your normal sleeping pattern changes significantly.

•  You feel that you can't go on.

•  You have trouble concentrating and cannot do your usual tasks.

•  Your relationships with friends, family and co-workers are significantly impacted.

•  You are unable to manage everyday activities like you used to.

•  You are relying on alcohol or drugs to cope.

•  You are feeling very distressed, irritable, or agitated much of the time.

For children, withdrawal, aggressive behavior, problems at school, sleep disturbance or difficulty

separating from caregivers may indicate the need for professional support.

Where To Get Help

If you are concerned about yourself or someone you care about, you can find help by calling 311 or

the numbers listed below. The service is confidential and available in several languages.

•  1-800-LifeNet (1-800-543-3638) (English)

•  1-877-Ayudese 1-877-298-3373 (Spanish)

•  1-877-990-8585 (Asian LifeNet)

•  1-212-982-5284 (TTY)

For other languages call 1-800-LifeNet and ask for a translator.

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MANAGEMENT INSTITUTE PO Box 331 * Salem, OR 97308 * (503) 585-3484© 2011 Cheri Lovre, MS www.cmionline.org [email protected] 

US that have less safety in their design than those in Japan, so don’t make promises about that.Instead, you might bring the focus here:

Although they are telling us that some nuclear material has escaped from the plants, they are a

long way from here. Let me show you what that means in terms of what will end up in the air here inthe US. (Hold some sand in your hand.)  If this sand were radio active, it would burn through my hand.

But think. If I went outside and threw this handful of sand up into the wind, it would scatter all over

the playground, and some would be carried downtown, and some would be up in the wind all the way toEngland! And one grain of sand that is radioactive wouldn’t have the ability to cause the same kind ofdanger that a whole handful would. Think about ice. If someone put a teeny tiny chip of ice on your

hand, it would melt SO fast. But if someone put your hand into a whole bag of ice chips, your handwould get really cold really fast.

Impact to us: When things like this happen, we have a range of reactions. Sometimes we are very sad for

them. We wouldn’t be very kind people if we just saw things like this and didn’t care about the people.And some of us might feel frightened, like “what if this happened to us?” There are other kinds of

reactions we might have as well. (Generate a list from student brainstorming. Put it on the board.)  

Putting fear into perspective: Sometimes when we hear about these things, or some of us see about it ontelevision, we become afraid that it might happen to us. Let’s look at how very unusual this kind of event

actually is. (You might show graphics for older students that show how many storms we have for each major disaster. For younger children, you might use a gallon jar that is empty, and then slowly pour white 

sand into the jar, and finally you might drop in one grain of another color – red or black – something visible 

when a student looks into the jar from the top – just that one grain perched above the whole gallon of 

sand.) 

How we can cope and what we can do:   (Now, look at each of those reactions students gave you and help 

them generate ideas about coping and responding.)  So let’s look at what we can do when we’re sad about

something like this. (Students can think about raising money to give to an organization or younger 

students could draw pictures of hope and you could send them to the Japanese Embassy. The goal here is 

to recognize that taking action is a great help in coping with feelings.) 

Looking at how people recover from these events: Generate discussion on what children or youthrecognize about what they have done in the past to cope with difficult times. The bottom line is that weget through difficult times best when we “bundle” together. You could hand one child a pencil. “Can you

break this?” and a child may be strong enough to break one pencil. Hand another child two pencils. “Canyou break these with your hands?” and maybe… then hand a child a “bundle” of ten pencils. “Hold these in

your hands. Can you break these all at once?” This is a great way to illustrate how an event like this can“break a human spirit” when we have to go through it alone, but that we survive these things much better

when there are others with us to whom we can cling, with whom we can work, etc.

Now begin the reassurances.

•  When things like this happen, many many international organizations immediately mobilize help. And

they’re good at it. Much will happen. Medical help, food, water, and shelter.

•  The way we get through difficult times is that we do it together. There are lots of people there whowill be helping one another, even early on. Friends and neighbors will hug and comfort and help all theycan. If you have an example of a difficult challenge that your community or your family faced, relate

all the good things that your network and outside groups provided.

•  Although things like this don’t happen very often, it seems like they do because television tells us

every single thing like this. But when we look at how many people die in earthquakes, we realize that itisn’t very many as a whole. So you could do something like putting one dried split pea in a gallon jug,and that represents the number of people who die every year in an earthquake. And then fill the jar

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MANAGEMENT INSTITUTE PO Box 331 * Salem, OR 97308 * (503) 585-3484© 2011 Cheri Lovre, MS www.cmionline.org [email protected] 

with all the other kinds of beans you have and that would represent all the other people. In general,the message is, “If there are this many people in the world, only this one would die in an earthquake.”

Examples from their own lives: What are some of the things you’ve done to get through difficult times?Sometimes our inclination is to entirely protect our children from what is happening. We would like for

youth to have happy childhoods, some level of naiveté, and to grow up without having to live in fear.Perhaps the best route is to look at where the balance is, and to separate that from which children need 

protection from that for which children need support.

What we can do: It is very helpful for students – really for anyone - if we can provide them theopportunity to do something. What are some of your ideas? Maybe we want to think about what we could

do to help people who are struggling right here in our own community. What would that look like?

Three: Provide the opportunity for students to do something. Research is showing that those who havesomething that they can do in the immediate aftermath of events fare better toward recovery. Young

children could draw pictures of hope and send them to the Japanese Embassy or to aide agencies that aregoing over to Japan. Older students could do fundraising. Depending on the age of students/children, you may

be able to move them toward doing something to help people locally.

Current research on raising resilient children does not tell us that those children who are most resilient grewup without facing adversity. We know that we are all born with a capacity toward resiliency, and that what

fosters resilience in children is having “protective factors” that allow them to face adversity with a network ofsupport, compassion and understanding. In facing that challenge, children are able to draw on internal

strength coupled with external support. With that, they are able to cope with the challenge and learn lessonsthat allow them to have a greater “toolkit” of healthy coping skills.

There are a couple of other considerations about deciding whether or to what degree to shield your child

knowing about these major events. One is that, when we are not within the area of impact, these events are awonderful opportunity to help your child learn about how people survive difficult times at a time when it isn’t

your crisis. Another positive is that this is a terrific time to teach empathy.

Current research in the field of trauma, however, is telling us that exposure to these events by watching

graphic coverage on television can manifest what is called “secondary trauma” or trauma within ourselves fromhigh levels of exposure to the event.

So where is the balance? It is absolutely prudent to shield your child/your students from the graphic

television coverage. Turn the TV off. Instead, use less psychologically saturating materials, such asnewspapers, or hop onto the internet and read (but skip the video footage). Reading and talking with children

allows them the time to reflect and question. Television coverage doesn’t allow this reflection in the same way.So instead of thinking so much about protecting them from the awareness of frightening events, think more in

terms of protecting them from receiving the information in ways that are psychologically overwhelming.

As noted, another reason to take time to talk with children about these events is that they are likely to hearabout them from others, even children as young as preschoolers. Children often don’t know whether to bring

up frightening thoughts or issues to their parents. They sometimes read our silence on the issue as a non-verbal cue that this isn’t something that is open for discussion. Then they worry in silence and we don’t know.If the child can just continue speaking about it, let them talk. Try to remember the points to which you’ll wantto return later, but try not to interrupt them if they are continuing to talk. If they aren’t talking easily, some

questions you might ask could include:

•  How did you hear about it?

•  What do you know?

•  When you think about it, what things do you think might make children sad?

•  What kinds of things might make children fearful?

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•  What do you wish someone could answer?

•  What do you wish adults understood about how this is for you?What you might notice about these questions is that, in some cases, instead of asking “What do you feel,” we

can ask “What might children be feeling…” The reason this is so effective is that it is less confrontational.The child can assume they might be answering for others, so they aren’t openly “owning” their fears, and yet

you can assume that the fears they’re transferring to others are most likely their own. So when a child saysthat other children might be fearful it could happen to them, you might respond with, “That makes sense to

me! I bet if I were your age I’d worry about exactly the same thing!” You’re validating that their fear is notunusual, but you also are going to follow up in the conversation with any honest assurances you can. For this

stage, the goal is to let the child put words to their most feared aspects, because naming something is thebeginning of a sense of control, and takes it out into the light from the hidden place inside them.

Finally, remember, we all feel more empowered if we can do something that makes a difference. What canyour children/students do? Raise money to give an organization? If the kids are old enough, they could make aproject of researching what groups are doing what and choose one they’d most like to support.

Remember, children don’t become resilient because they never face adversity. They become resilient because

they face adversity with external supports including compassionate adults who listen, that we believe in theirabilities to cope and have high expectations of them, and that we give them the means to contribute in a

meaningful way. Model your belief in your calm manner. Listen more than you speak when students/childrenare trying to share their stories with you. Remember, it is possible to validate that you can understand

children their ages having the fears they name without validating that the fears have a basis in reality. Clarifyfor them the ways that you accept their fears but don’t harbor them yourself, and why. But don’t ask children

“why” about anything! It tends to put them on the defensive. More effective language might be, “Tell me moreabout that.” “When did you first think that?” or, “….feel that way?”

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QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS FOR 

JAPAN DISASTER RELIEF EFFORT 

1.  To what organizations can a school contribute?

There are many organizations that are accepting donations for relief efforts for thevictims of the Japan earthquake and tsunami. We recommend that schools make their

donations to the Mayor’s Fund to Advance New York City, which will then distributethem to reputable relief organizations that are working in or with Japan. You can

visit www.nyc.gov for more information. If schools decide to donate to other

organizations, they must make sure that they are reputable charitable organizations.

2.  What types of fundraising activities can my school plan?

There are many ways schools can raise funds. Below are some examples:

a.  Bake Sales: Each school will be allowed to hold one bake sale either

during or after school hours to benefit the Japan disaster relief effort. Forthese bake sales, the Chancellor is temporarily waiving the restrictions in

Chancellor’s Regulation A-812, but the following restrictions will remainin effect:

No candy or soda may be sold to students; and

No bake sales may take place in the school cafeteria.

b.  Used Book Sales: Used books may be collected and sold to raise money

for the Japan disaster relief effort.

c.  Pledge-collecting activities, such as athletic events, walk-a-thons, read-a-

thons or other tournaments. Students may collect pledges from parentsand members of the community. These fund-raising events may not be

held during the school day, and students may not collect pledges duringschool hours. There can be no direct solicitation of pledges or money

from students anywhere in the school during the school day.

d.  Collection box for money (or other items). These should be placed in asecure common space in the school and the proceeds or items secured at

the end of each day. Collections should be done this way so the identities

of students making contributions and not making contributions are notrevealed.

e.  Tickets-selling events, such as musical, theatrical or athletic events.

3.  Are any activities prohibited?The following activities are not allowed:

a.  The sale of tickets for children’s attendance at movie houses and theatres,

unless the project is directly connected with the curriculum.

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b.  Door-to-door solicitations of funds by children.

c.  The sale of raffle tickets to any children.d.  Bingo or any other form of gambling.

e.  Direct solicitation. No one – including staff, the School Leadership Team,

parent associations, other students or outside organizations – can collect

money or goods directly from students anywhere in school, includingclassrooms, home room and the cafeteria, at any time during the school

day. However, as mentioned above, it is appropriate and permissible to

place a collection box in a secure common space. Additionally, schoolscan recruit students to voluntarily participate in fundraising when school is

not in session, as long as school personnel do not act as a conduit and

collect funds from students on behalf of a charity. School personnel maydistribute flyers or other literature, or otherwise notify students, of out-of-

school fundraising activities.

4.  Are schools restricted in their ability to hold in-school fundraisers for Japan

disaster relief efforts?In order for schools to be able to hold fundraisers to support the relief effort, the

Chancellor has waived the restriction in Chancellor’s Regulation A-610 that limits thenumber of fundraising activities that may occur during school hours. The Chancellor

is temporarily waiving this restriction to enable schools to engage in fundraising

activities for Japan disaster relief. You can read Chancellor’s Regulation A-610

online at http://docs.nycenet.edu/docushare/dsweb/Get/Document-26/A-610.pdf  

5.  If I have specific legal questions not covered here, whom can I contact?

If you have other ideas about ways your school can raise funds for the relief effortand have questions about whether they are permissible, contact the Office of Legal

Services by calling (212) 374-6888, emailing [email protected], or

contacting your Senior Field Counsel or the DOE Ethics Officer at

[email protected]

6.  Can people make individual donations to charitable organizations?

Yes. Charitable organizations will accept direct contributions from individuals aswell as from schools.

7.  Can we collect cash, coins and checks?Yes, but it is important to remember that all giving must be voluntary. Please ensure

that even where donations are made by check, neither the principal nor other school

staff pressures staff members, parents, or students to contribute when they do notwish to do so voluntarily. We encourage you to deposit the funds into school bank 

accounts the same day, if possible, and then write out checks from the school account

to the Mayor’s Fund to Advance New York City or other organization(s) of your

choosing. In the meantime, we encourage you to keep the money in a secure place.

Please also refer online to http://dfoapps.nycenet.edu/SOP/Default.aspx?c=1024  forstandard operating procedures for collecting and accounting of funds. Additionally, if 

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schools collect checks made out directly to charitable organizations for Japan relief 

efforts, schools should forward those checks to the charitable organizations.

8.  What if my school doesn’t have a bank account?

Most schools should have bank accounts. If you do not have a school bank account,

you can bring a money order or bank check to 65 Court St., Room 1802, BankingUnit. The money order or bank check should be payable to: Department of 

Education/Japan Disaster Relief. If you need any additional help, contact Rachid

Dehbi from the Banking Unit at 718-935-5384 or at [email protected]. Asmentioned above, we encourage you to keep the money in a secure place before it is

deposited.