Dating and engagement

Dating and Engagement

Oct 4, 2012

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I. What are some of the things that complicate the issue of dating in our day?

A. Dating is not specifically mentioned in the Bible.

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B. Children see a totally wrong view of sex and male/female relationships on TV, in the movies and among schoolmates.

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C. Parents themselves have had no teaching on biblical principles that might apply to the dating scene.

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D. Some parents think that matchmaking and early dating is cute and they foster it or promote it early in their child’s life.

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E. Parents find it difficult to resist the persuasions of their own teenagers.

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II. What are some biblical concepts that apply to this area of dating and relationships?

A. God wants us to be free from any premarital sexual encounters and promiscuity.Oct 4, 2012

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Sexual immorality by biblical definition includes the following:

1. Licentiousness sometimes translated “lewdness”, which is the stirring up of sensual desires in another personOct 4, 2012

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2. Passion of lust

3. Evil Desires

4. Fornication, which is any form of sex before marriage

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B. God does want us to get married, but some how He wants us to do so without sinning in the process.

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1. The example of Mary and Joseph. They were betrothed or engaged to be married, but they did not come together in a sexual way until after they were married.

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2. When we take advantage of another person sexually outside of marriage, the Bible speaks of this as defrauding them.

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Defrauding is “using taking advantage of or injuring” someone else for your own gratification. It involves taking something that does not belong to you.

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C. The romantic desires that we have within us are given to us by God and are meant to push us toward marriage, which is part of God’s eternal purpose.

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1. These desires must be brought under the control of the Holy Spirit.

2. These desires can only be righteously fulfilled in marriage.

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III. Why do some singles end up getting involved in immoral relationship?

A. Because they think that having sex proves their love.

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B. Because “everyone” is doing it.

C. Because for young women it is the expected price of a date.

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D. Because it seems necessary to make one popular.

E. Because it is seen as a sport or game.

F. Because it is an easy step from lesser forms of physical activity. Oct 4, 2012

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Social Roles & Relationships

IV. What is God’s pattern for developing relationships?

In God’s pattern…

A. The relationship starts by being one in the Spirit.

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1. No one could ever marry someone that is not a Christian because there can be no unity of spirit.

2. If you cannot marry an unbeliever, you must not date an unbeliever.Oct 4, 2012

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B. The relationship develops by becoming one in soul realm.

1. This involves becoming one in our mind, will and emotions.

2. This could be described as cultivating deepening levels of friendship. Oct 4, 2012

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3. It is when the relationship reaches the “close friend” level that you are in a position to begin exploring the idea of a romantic relationship.

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C. The third level involves the coming together in the physical realm. This realm is reserved for after marriage.

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V. What areas should be considered in making a marriage choice?

A. Spiritual Life

B. Character/Personality

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C. Interpersonal Relationships

D. Natural Life

E. Life Purpose

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VI. How should engagement be handled?

The purpose of engagement is to provide bridge from the state of being single to the state of being married.

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A. Engagement begins with the couple’s mutual commitment to marry.

This commitment should be made in the light of:

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1. A serious time of seeking the Lord for his approval.

2. The heartfelt approval of both the natural and spiritual coverings (authorities) involved.

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B. It is advisable to go through the Pre-Engagement Questionnaire.

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C. There are certain things of a public nature that will make the engagement official.

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