Dare To Fail · 2015-11-12 · What makes you come alive? ... Beautiful worlds! ... Too long they have said 'amen' to whatever comes along and settled for 'thats just the way it is'.

Dare To Fail

If your DREAMS don't scare you, they're not big enough!

© 2012

Many years ago when as a wife, mother , sister in the gospel, daughter, cook, maid , chauffeur.....(you

get the idea) I was knee deep in the weekly, daily and minute to minute minutia that can over take us

and have us forget that not only is this life for testing and experience but also for celebration! With the

Lord's help and through a dear friend I remembered that we each were made in our Father's image with

the ability to DREAM, IMAGINE and CREATE the magical moments that send JOY through our

veins. In other words, LIVE, dare to live more abundantly. President Hinkley Stated,” Life is to be

enjoyed and not merely endured.” Sometimes I think we misunderstand that we are to love ourselves

as well as 'our neighbor'.

How can we follow God's commandment to love our neighbor as ourself if we have not given ourself

permission to fill our own bucket?. An empty vessel has nothing to give. So sister's......

LETS DARE TO DREAM!

“If you had permission to do what you really want to do, what would you do? Don‟t ask how; that will

cut your desire off at the knees. How is never the right question; how is a faithless question. How is

God‟s department. He is asking you what. What is written in your heart? What makes you come alive?

If you could do what you‟ve always wanted to do, what would it be? You see, a women‟s calling is

written on her true heart, and she discovers it when she enters the frontier of her deep desires.” —

John Eldredge,

In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the

wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing. Theodore Roosevelt

Put Your Heart On The Line

Putting your heart on the line. This concept is scary, but neccessary.

The Eternities belong to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams. Annon

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the

doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,

whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short

again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually

strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a

worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst,

if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and

timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat."Theodore Roosevelt

Where Do I Begin?

If you are among the many lovely ladies that, like me, in the past have devoted yourself entirely to the

caretaking of others this is a very hard step in the right directon. Take it slow and be gentle with

yourself. I guarantee you will feel GUILTY for even considering that your dreams are important and

they matter greatly. In the Book and movie "The Help" Aibeleen tells little May Mobley, " You is smart,

You is Kind, You is important." This is not just for the wonderful little people in this world, but for you

as well.

As you start on this journey of self love you must become accustomed to listening to your heart and not

judge too harshly. Our Father in heaven wants us to know what we love, what we think, what we want

to create. This is the time to try things out. One day we hope to partner with a companion and create

worlds. Beautiful worlds! Lets take some baby steps here.

I have the priveledge in my line of work to help others realize what they love and bring it home for

them. The process can be like an archeological dig sometimes, as they have denied themselves for so

long. Too long they have said 'amen' to whatever comes along and settled for 'thats just the way it is'.

As I help them discover what kind of personal beauty they crave and trust in their own opinions, they

come alive to something hidden deep in their hearts.

So, which way to go from here? In a favorite book of mine "Simple Abundance" by Sarah Ban

Breathnach, she states, "You must be very still and listen, listen to the whispers of your heart. Look

within. Your silent companion has lit lanterns of love along your pathway to wholeness."

If you don't listen and decide where it is you want to go you may end up like Alice.....

"Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?"

"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to," said the Cat.

"I don‟t much care where--" said Alice.

"Then it doesn‟t matter which way you go," said the Cat.

"--so long as I get SOMEWHERE," Alice added as an explanation.

"Oh, you‟re sure to do that," said the Cat, "if you only walk long enough."

I'm not sure about you but I'd rather have a destination in mind. Even when I have taken the first steps

onto an unfamiliar path decided upon I have always found that I'm never alone. The Lord is by my side

helping me know the next step to take.

There's A Hole In My Soul

Sometimes as we yearn to embrace and love ourselves we find we are brought up short by hedges in

our way...or as the watercolor by Lisa Mann Dirkes says, There's a hole in my soul.

This is where many falter. Just as we are all pumped up, stretched out and standing at the starting line

anxious to start the race we feel an old "football injury" acting up so to speak. Just when the flicker of

hope is kindled and we start to feel excitement in the journey that lies ahead, we remember our

nothingness....... Our past. Our pain. Here is the place we must revisit if it stands in the way of us

winning our eternal race. This is where The great Lord and Savior is waiting to heal us from all the

pains and sins of this world.

Many years ago I was at this point. I had been uplifted and inspired by a fellow sister and I could feel

the spirit prompting me to move forward and trust in the tender feelings that I knew to be true, however

there was another voice of doubt as well. Reminding me that I had not had a charmed life and didn't

deserve to be truly happy. That was reserved for those lucky ones who suffered no sadness, loneliness,

abandonment, brought up in an intact household with a family who did family night every Monday,

dinner on the table at six pm every evening and grew up in "Mayberry".

I then prayed mightily to Heavenly Father to help me when I had an experience that put it into

perspective. My mind opened up and a feeling came over me of a different time and place. A feeling I

couldn't remember having here in my earth life. The feeling was one of exhilaration at the upcoming

opportunity to come to earth, receive my body and experience all the sensations and experiences the

earth had to offer.

My placement here, my curcumstances and position, looks, wealth, had absolutely nothing to do with

it. I knew I would have a chance to do and experience wonderful things that up to that point I could

only imagine. And then the thought, was I going to let all of these things that seemed so insignificant

keep me from having joy in my life now? Not a Chance!

In a very thought provoking short story by Carol Lynn Pearson we are introduced to Millie's Mother

and Her Red Dress.

It hung there in the closet

While she was dying, Mother‟s red dress,

Like a gash in the row

Of dark, old clothes

She had worn away her life in.

They had called me home

And I knew when I saw her

She wasn‟t going to last.

When I saw the dress, I said

“Why, Mother – - how beautiful!

I‟ve never seen it on you.”

“I‟ve never worn it,” she slowly said.

“Sit down, Millie – - I‟d like to undo

A lesson or two before I go, if I can.”

I sat by her bed

And she sighed a bigger breath

Then I thought she could hold.

“Now that I‟ll soon be gone,

I see some things.

Oh, I taught you good – - but I taught you wrong.”

“What do you mean Mother?”

“Well – - I always thought

That a good woman never takes her turn,

That she‟s just for doing for somebody else.

Do here, do there, always keep

Everybody else‟s wants tended and make sure

Yours are at the bottom of the heap.”

“Maybe someday you‟ll get to them.

But of course you never do.

My life was like that – - doing for your dad,

Doing for the boys, for your sisters, for you.”

“You did – - everything a mother could.”

“Oh, Millie, Millie, it was not good – -

For you – - for him. Don‟t you see?

I did you the worst of wrongs.

I asked for nothing – - for me!”

“Your father in the other room,

All stirred up and staring at the walls – -

When the doctor told him, he took

It bad – - came to my bed and all but shook

The life right out of me. „You can‟t die,

Do you hear? What‟ll become of me?‟

„ What‟ll become of me?‟

It‟ll be hard, all right when I go.

He can‟t even find the frying pan, you know.”

“And you children – -

I was a free ride for everybody, everywhere.

I was the first one up and the last one down

Seven days out of the week.

I always took the toast that got burned,

And the very smallest piece of pie.”

“I look at how some of your brothers

Treat their wives now

And it makes me sick, ‟cause it was me

That taught it to them. And they learned,

They learned that a woman doesn‟t

Even exist except to give.

Why, every single penny that I could save

Went for your clothes, or your books,

Even when it wasn‟t necessary.

Can‟t even remember once when I took

Myself downtown to buy something beautiful – -

For me.”

“Except last year when I got that red dress.

I found I had twenty dollars

That wasn‟t especially spoke for.

I was on my way to pay extra on the washer.

But somehow – - I came home with this big box.

Your father really gave it to me then.

„Where you going to wear a thing like that to – -

Some opera or something?‟

And he was right, I guess.

I‟ve never, except in the store,

Put on that dress.”

“Oh Millie – - I always thought if you take

Nothing for yourself in this world

You‟d have it all in the next – - somehow

I don‟t believe that anymore.

I think the Lord wants us to have something – -

Here – - and now.”

“And I‟m telling you , Millie, if some miracle

Could get me off this bed, you could look

For a different mother, ‟cause I would be one.

Oh, I passed up my turn so long

I would hardly know how to take it.

But I‟d learn, Millie.

I would learn!”

It hung there in the closet

While she was dying, Mother‟s red dress,

Like a gash in the row

Of dark, old clothes

She had worn away her life in.

Her last words to me were these:

“Do me the honor, Millie,

Of not following in my footsteps.

Promise me that.”

I promised.

She caught her breath,

Then mother took her turn....

In death.

This really gives me moment to pause and ponder.... I have found in my own life whenever there is one

of the Lord's perfect principles we are to learn for our own peace and happiness , there is a counterfiet

that the adversary will try to disguise as the "real macoy", but in the end leaves us feeling hollow, sad

and usually abused. The principle of Charity, the pure love of Christ in its perfect form, never fails.

So....wear the red dress.

I have also learned that I sometimes feel that old nagging feeling that tells me that I have not yet

arrived. And I know this to be true. Simply put, we live in a fallen world. We need to do all we can do,

knowing that in the end we can never be enough. We are told of our nothingness compared to God. Our

"nothingness" in the context of power. Power to change the fact that we are fallen and cannot save

ourselves. Because to God we are far from nothing, we are everything! So much so that He gave His

only begotten Son to change the balance of justice that we can be made whole once again and return

home....to finally,..... arrive.

So my sweet sister, let us lean into our pain and let Him carry it. You are meant to have joy in this very

glorious fact. Clean House where it needs to be cleaned and be assured that there is always a place for

you. He can heal the "hole in your soul".

So Who Do You Think You Are?

Make a list.

"I AM......" Number one on your list should be,

A daughter of God.

You can do so much with a Father like that!

My list goes something like this:

Who Am I?

I am a draw-er, a dreamer, an illuminator, a singer.

A strive-er, a builder, a creater, a bring-er.

An interpreter, a daughter, a sister, a friend a partner,

a mother.

What I Do?

I strive to create inventive beautiful places to love and live

and dream incorporating color, texture, trust and laughter.

I try to return to a place where time stands still surrounded

by the language of warmth and gentle joys. Sending insights

to the soul with uplifting talismans of hope.

My Tools?

Something to do. Someone to love. Something to hope for.

Imagination. Clean sheets of paper. Pens,pencils, erasers, oils

and watercolor. Wood ,power tools, dirt, glue, glitter and ribbon. Musical

notes, and lots of movement in one direction or another.

My Inspirations?

Amazing Women. Honorable Men. Wise words, patience from the

wee ones. Trees, grass, sky. Unfortunate looking animals and

funny bugs. Courage, architecture, daring to fail, hope and this

quote " Be patient with me, God is not finished with me yet."

Joy Is Not Containable

I can't tell how much I appreciate those blessings around me, I call friends, sisters, daughters and

mothers.

Each day they strive to be courageous and joyfull. Somedays I see them doing hard, scary things.

Other days, celebrating life to it's fullest. A bond and trust forms when we are free to be who we are

and no longer feel the need to hide behind barriers of one kind or another.

(I must share this very important secret I have discovered that has allowed me to relax with them.)

Guess what? They are not the ones who hold the verdict on me!!!

My husband, mother, children, and friends do not hold the verdict on me to see if I am sufficient or not!

May I say,? Phew!

This precious responsibility lies with the ONLY ONE that knows my heart. Who knows that my best

efforts sometimes do not pay off. And He judges on effort, not results. If this were not the case we

would all be on thin ice indeed.

I do love sharing my life with these angels who brighten, lift, laugh with and bear testimony. I also

applaud those I have yet to meet that have likewise motivated me to new heights.

In the book "Celebration" by Jaroldeen Asplund Edwards she talks about going to visit her adult

daughter on a rainy foggy spring morning and being reluctantly kidnapped to "see some ridiculous

daffodil's". She writes;

"After driving about twenty minutes on an old dirt road, pulling up to the far side of an old chuch,

jumping out, with shivering children in tow did I see an inconspicuous hand lettered sign, "Daffodil

Garden." We rounded a slope and a corner of the path and I looked up and gasped.

Before me lay the most glorious sight, unexpectedly and completely spendid! It looked as though

someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it down over the mountain peak and slopes where it

had run into every crevice and over every rise.Magestic swirling patterns, great ribbons and swaths of

deep orange, white, yellow, salmon pink, saffron and butter yellow."

She goes on to say that she had one question for her daughter in speechless wonder. "Who"?

The answer was "just one woman". On the planter's modest little porch was a sign that read,

"Answers to the questions I know your asking." The first answer was simple, "50,000 bulbs".

The second answer was "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet and very little brain."

The third answer was, "Began in 1958".

There it was. The Daffodile Principle. Life changing for the sweet lady and every soul whom was

fortunate enough to behold it. She forever changed the world in which she lived one bulb at a time.

It reminds me of a quote I read in the book M.I.L.K. "Joy comes from the life and love we create, in the

love and life we live. (Read that one more time, let it sink in.)

In Mathew 5:14-16 It states very plainly that "ye are the light of the world", ...and "let your light so

shine before men that they may see your good works and glorify your Father which is in heaven.

Joy cannot be containable!

Stay In The Light

I say stay in the light even if you have to wear the light on your head!

To me staying in the light means to always stay teachable and meek, always conscious of where your

strength comes from. In the Children’s book, “Cock-A-Doodle”, a sweet kite boasts of his ability to fly

high and touch the sky and doesn’t understand the role of his anchor. Just like us, we sometimes forget

that we have an anchor that gives us the ability to fly high and touch the sky. Take every opportunity to

thank Heavenly Father for leading you to higher planes and bigger dreams. For walking with us

through unfamiliar, sometimes scary paths.

Be sure and plan for the fact that we will be tested and tried in all our dreams to see if we will truly pay

the price it takes. But one thing is sure, if we succeed or, get the opportunity to give it another try, we

are forever changed. The knowlegde, wisdom and empathy we develope is worth any bump or

mountain in our way. The Lord will surely use these experiences to gently polish us. I promise you that

after the pain of polishing is over, you will be SO grateful you came this route. That you gave Him the

chance to teach you something you may not have ever had the chance to learn otherwise.

One thing that is so vital as we make efforts to stay in the light, is a "gratitude journal". It could be a

simple binder with paper to a leather bound journal. But as you write down at least five things you are

greatful for each night before you lay down your head, you will be able to see the Lord's hand more

abundantly in places you may have missed before. And.... be sure to thank yourself for the brave and

hard things you did that day. You deserve it. Remember what He said about virtuous women in

Proverbs 31:10 "that her price is far above rubies".

So Ruby........Are you ready to Wear Wings?

Ready To Wear Wings

Wings to take us to new heights? To let your very personal, wonderful, magestic, and God given

dreams take flight?

I believe that Heavenly Father gives us all gifts. I believe that those who develop those gifts can have

more added upon. And I know that He does not give us gifts or talents to be wasted. We are loved

beyond our comprehension and we are precious, each one. My prayer is that when we see this love

made manifest in our lives and in the opportunities we have to grow closer to our Great Mediator, our

Brother, our Perfect Advocate & Friend, Our Savior that we will not miss a chance to bear testimony of

His divinity through each talent and gift He so lovingly bestows.

One of my favorite quotes by Marianne Williamson and later used by Nelson Mandela

used in his 1994 inaugural speech states;

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond

measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be

brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that

other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were

born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in

everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do

the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

I dedicate this to my Savior Jesus Christ amen.

Written and Compiled by Jacquie Jones April 1, 2012

© 2012 Dare To Fail BYU Women's Conference Jacquie Jones “All rights reserved.

for the BYU's Women's Conference “Sweet Is The Work”

All watercolor was done by Lisa Mann Dirkes Dirkes Lisa

www.lisamanndirkes.com.

"pastel blonde." pastel blonde. Lisa Mann Dirkes, 11162011. Web. 2 Apr 2012.

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Ban Breathnach, Sarah. Simple Abundance. 1st. New York, NY: Warner Books, 1995. 1-50. Print.

<warnerbooks.com>.

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wonderland.net/books/alice-in-wonderland-quotes.html. N.p., n.d. Web. 2 Apr 2012.

Pearson , Carol Lynn. "Empowering LDS Wome."

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Edwards, Jaroleen Asplund. Celebration. 1st. Salt Lake City : Deseret Book, 1995. 39-51. Print.

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