Cosmoastrosis

by DANIEL RUTLEDGE

C O S M O A S T R O S I S

2.......moon4.......aries6.......cancer8.......crater10.......gemini12.......hercules14......leo16......orion18......pegasus20......tauros22......ursa major24......ursa minor

1.

2.

i still think of you ya knoweven if it was two years agoi now have all i need herenew faces including my owna place to call homebut as i’ve growni know none of that lastssoon i’ll be goneas will theyand like you beforei gave you the moonnow you’re an unfamiliar faceyour namedistaste

3.

4.

you found god in between the ground and the skyand where we’re you going?ann arbor or baltimore?i can’t remember anymoreit doesn’t matter anymorewe shot for the sun but hit aries’s horns insteadwe were struck with uncertainty do you feel alone?do you feel loved?i can’t sayi can’t make it staylove won’t stayit fades

5.

6.

self pity on a friday nighti feel the need to take myself out of the equationto show the world my darkest shades are darker than their darkest graysto show we aren’t apartto prove i don’t belongi am the cancer to their lungsi am a song unsung

7.

8.

remember the asteroidit tore through the skyin a brilliant fashionit hit the ground which was usand left a crater so big it shook the whole east coastmy hand still shakesi still can’t fill the hole it madeempty but alivei see you’re doing finewell that’s my linenothings wrong and everything is beautifuleverything falls and nothing fitsthe whole earth shifts

9.

10.

i write another stupid verse about all those gals that did me wrongit fuels my creativitymy own hate towards the things not working outmy hometownscars have formed through those i’ve let nearonly to sear new woundsi can blame them all i wantthose ex-people from my lifebut how much better am i?i won’t fall for another gemini

11.

12.

i fear for what’s to comeand you my deari scream at what i can’t controlbut that’s the world right?a systematic architecture of random events triggered by the actions and misactions of you and your peersso what am i?just a speck in god’s eyei ain’t herculesi can’t make the earth spin

13.

14.

i’ve got leo by his manedoing my best to control his teethhe’s better off freebut that’s what i needa second guard to my wallto rip apart all those who come neari am only what i fearviscious and sad but i am the monumenti am the lion who feeds on your insecuritiesi am the darki am the visciousput me down

15.

16.

introspection can kill a man faster than the knives canwhat is so wrong with mei can only write about what is darkit’s like everything has this haze around itpoisoning all i touchuntil there’s nothing leftit’s my fault for thati was never much of a talkerbottled everything in so when i let it outit broke free with such a forceto break orion’s beltif i’m not careful it’ll swallow me wholeif you’re not careful it’ll swallow you whole

17.

18.

hold on to pegasusyou must survive thisstormhe’ll get you throughas for ileave me behindi’ll find my way through the debrisor i’ll get lost amongst the restheaven may awaitbut who’s to say i want to live foreveri’ve had my fill of the air herebreathe in and release deari look forward to the quietthere’s only dark there it’s perfect

19.

20.

i’m not as strong as taurosi guess i miss who you werenot whatever this isa monster as pretty as her sistersand as ugly as her insideshell serves you right but we both know you’ll buy your way outeither wayi’ll save you a seat in the waiting room

21.

22.

i guess this is part of the closermy closurei write in wake of mixed emotionsmixed thoughts on mixed topicsa mixed bag of ill will towards the old cityand difficulty in coping with the new onei stand before you as broken as i am wholemy fascade is to run circles around those who can’t seeor won’t seethat i am hereimpartiallyhollow are my bones and my lungs are toobut they can fill a pretty word or twoin between lines of hope and despairperplexed as to who i am and as to wheremy soul left in the death of all thingsi still hate herursa major

23.

24.

and here i am twenty years laterthe dichotomy of time has shown me this city’s true faceand so i left iti don’t plan on returning save to keep contact with the roots that planted me there that i’ve grown to lovebut as we grow old we grow upand out of where and who we areinto something far greaterinto an entity all its ownits a brilliant thing to realizewhen everything fits into placeand you find out where you’re going and how to get therestorms along the waybut none so great that will break your pathinstead they will shape your heartgive you scarsto grace all who will come after todaythis dayleave what hurts behindyou don’t need ityou don’t need herursa minor

25.

constellationn.1. AstronomyAn arbitrary formation of stars perceived as a figure or design, especially one of 88 recognized groups named after characters from classical mythology and various common animals and objects.2. The configuration of planets at the time of one's birth, regarded by astrologers as determining one's character or fate.3. A set or configuration, as of related items, properties, ideas, or individuals

i wrote this to those that will read itto my friends and familymay the light shine on all of you

written & illustrated by DANIEL RUTLEDGEin association with NOVAPROJECTS