COMMUNICATING ANF NEGOTIATING Core, model and conditions of successful negotiation Verbal communication (speaking, listening and writing) and non-verbal (body language, distances) Presentations, public speeches Psychology of contacts, persuasion, counter- argumentation Principles and techniques of negotiation, mediation References [email protected]
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COMMUNICATING ANF NEGOTIATING Core, model and conditions of successful negotiation Verbal communication (speaking, listening and writing) and non- verbal.
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COMMUNICATING ANF NEGOTIATING
Core, model and conditions of successful negotiation
Verbal communication (speaking, listening and writing) and non-verbal (body language, distances)
Presentations, public speeches
Psychology of contacts, persuasion, counter-argumentation
Principles and techniques of negotiation, mediation
emotions, thoughts, words obstacles words, thoughts, emotions
COMMUNICATION MODEL
COMMUNICATIVE BEHAVIORS DIAGRAMAND POTENTIAL SOURCES OF MISUNDERSTANDING
Reception of understandable
signals
available codes known
careful reception
Active interpretation
Understanding, correct interpretation
code unknown broken communication
inattentive listener broken communication
noise in channel broken communication
interpretation mistakes broken communication
successful communication
no interpretation mistakes
no noise
attentive listener
code known
SPEAKING
• we learn to read and write – not much about speaking • speaking carefully – clear pronunciation, opening mouth, practice in front of a mirror (e.g. Demosthenes)• voice tone – genes, ability to lower voice by the full octave – contact with a speech therapist, business – low voice tone• timbre – warm, pleasant, depending on emotions and smile• fluency of speech - language tails, fillers • speed of speech – avoid speaking too slow
• volume – when to speak louder and when quieter• sentence melody• intonation• word choice, jargon
change what you have to change and accept what you have to accept
small talk at the beginning of conversation
nobody likes touchy questions
Listening
• we can think faster than speak, that's why it's easy to think about our problems while listening to others • in contact with others 'both ears' are more important than 'golden mouth'• focus on conversation is necessary for successful listeningempathy – empathize with your interlocutor, without prejudice about his appearance or behavior • eye contact helps to listen • notes help to listen and remember• ignoring external obstacles – psychological attitude •good proportions between listening and speaking help• practicability of content helps too• it's always better to listen when you know the purpose of meeting
Writing
''Forgive me this long letter but I didn't have time to write a short one.'' R. Pascal
• short sentences: 16-19 words• known words, without wordiness• verbs make the text more lively – in reports – no personal pronouns• metaphors encourage imagination• paragraphs and chapters• text editing - headlines• writing as a warm-up for the pencil and brain• taking notes of ideas helps to write•reasoning logic – what's in the head will be on paper
Body language
• open body position – hands, gestures, smile, – openness causes openness • closed body position – better run away• self-confidence –hands, looks, silhouette, head helplessness, depression, aggression – avoid such gestures and attitudes • head – hairdo, face, smile, look, mimical facial movements, carefulness and caring• eye contact – from 30% to 60% of conversation time, forehead and eyebrows
• gesticulation – from waist up to chin level
• straight body position
clothing – matching situation, harmony of pieces,
colors, tidiness
• naturalness is a friend of body language
• relation of body language and speech
• greeting – hand shake, principles
• distance between interlocutors – matching situation
and culture
Space management
friendly conversationdistance- intimate- personal
conversation + competitiondistance- personal- social
cooperationdistance- personalsocial
individual (parallel) workdistance- social- public
Four phases:
1. Prepare materials
1. Prepare yourself
1. Prepare room
1. Prepare listeners
PRESENTATIONS AND PUBLIC SPEECHES
PREPARING MATERIALS
• strategy – good preparation prevents future disaster
• good timing
• presentation content structure – more or less complicated
• presentation layout – logic, cause and effect principle
• variety of measures – slides, board, paper, charts, movement,
color
• questions from audience and answers
• prepare yourself for the unexpected – Murphy's law
• preparations are 8 times longer than presentations
PREPARING YOURSELF
• come before time to be on time
• fight stress – relax, breathing, experience
• take care of your physical and metal well-being
• record yourself – dictaphone, camera
• microphone - check: desktop, clip-on, portable,
• prepare room for yourself
• appearance – first impression: 55/ 38/ 7
• clothing – favorite, tested, well-fitting• speak before meal• gestures – open, matching – we believe in what we see• smile – matching situation• careful speaking – voice tone modulation• speed of speech• always with your profile toward the audience• eye contact with the whole audience• moderate body dynamics
ROOM PREPARATION
• air-conditioning – fresh air inside• tables layout• screen, board, flip chart• tired after 15, 45 and 90 minutes• remembering – principle of 7 plus, minus 2• golden thoughts• activating audience•controlling time• handouts for audience – before, during and after presentation• cleaning room after presentation
PRZYGOTOWANIE SŁUCHACZY
• addressing and greeting the audience: Mr Chairman, Mr President, Ladies and Gentlemen, Dear Sir
• agenda – layout and time of presentation
• audience's reaction – help in gaining audience's attention
• questions – during, after presentation, answers – single answers, all together
• answer – paraphrase, reducing distance, pause before answer – the 4 second rule
• taking notes of questions
• do not look above people's head
MISTAKES IN PRESENTATIONS
MATERIALS – preparation, readability, time of presentation, sequencing, most important questions
APPEARANCE AND CLOTHES – professional, straight body position, eye contact, open gestures, hands, harmony of clothes
GŁOS – speaking to the audience, careful pronunciation, volume, speed, tone, melody, sentences, fillers, language tails, speech dynamics
ADRESSING AND AGENDA- introduction, body, conclusion (say what you'll be
talking about, say what you want to say and say what you talked about)
PSYCHOOGICAL RULES ON CUSTOMERS' BEHAVIOR
Set patterns of behavior
Justified request is more effective
Rule of contrast rule
Rule of reciprocity
Big and small request – refusal and approval
Involvement and consistence
Rule of social evidence of legitimacy
Rule of liking and friendliness
Rule of authority
Rule of inaccessibility
Psychological rules of assessment
• feelings and emotional states of the person assessing
• preliminary hypothesis – searching evidence
• middle-of-scale grade
• novelty effect
• aureole effect
• grade related to presentation method – fat and slim
• amount of loss – one big loss is worse than several small
ones
Psychological rules of assessment – continued
• presents – a few small presents ARE better than a big one
• it's difficult to erase one negative message once it's been given
• analytical assessment (partial) vs clinical assessment (holistic)
• regression to average rule
• anchoring rule
• rule of psychological accessibility
• illusion of being in control
• compensation vs conjunction formulae
Psychology of persuasion (1)• persuasion based on 'everybody wins'
• secret of success – ability to accept others' point of view
• ability to deal with people – goods like anything else
• knowledge does not equal ability to act
• questions lead to discovery of others' system of values
• determine which values bring together and which drive apart
• magic words name – names attract attention there you go and thank you that's why and because
Psychology of persuasion (2)
• assuming the obvious you sure/must have seen it
you know
you understand
you will realize
be happy
• adding credibility be objective – talk about both advantages and
shortcomings
be precise – 28,40, is not 30
Psychology of persuasion (3)
• ways to quickly come into contact
copying partner's gestures, movements, breathing and
words
true interest in the interlocutor
confirmation of contact
asking questions to determine values, principles and
needs
CONFLICT
STRATEGIES IN CONFLICT SITUATIONS
1. Domination strategy2. Strategy of accepting enemy3. Resignation strategy (conflict disappears)4. Strategy of solving problems
NEGOTIATIONS – VICTORY WITH A NON ZERO RESULT
Three criteria for negotiation method assessment
1. achieving sensible agreement2. efficiency3. improving relations between two sides
NEGOTIATION PROCESS
Preparation
Debate
Proposals
Trade-in solutions
time, information, recognition
what we want, what they want
out of what two parties want, what can be traded?
out of what two parties want, what will be traded?
NEGOTIATIONS
•calculator and notes give time for thinking
• it's better to solve a problem rather than look who's to blame
• avoid giving precise calculations
• 'empty safe' may be a bluff
• good offer will satisfy partner's needs and expectations
• tough negotiators are held in higher esteem
• state your conditions before offers
• positive form is stranger than negative one
• avoid haggling pitfall
• core of negotiations – bilateral exchange
• 'for free' may also be too expensive
• wait for offers or give them
• do not accept first offer
• starting offer – beneficial for the beginning party
• beware of promises of future profits
• lawyers in higher demand – designing contracts
• avoid taking decisions when you are driven into a corner
• do not use a phrase: 'to be negotiated'
• most useful word in negotiations: – IF –
• core of the matter, negotiations without emotions
• subconsciousness – negotiator's powerful asset
• negotiating power increases safety boundaries
• fixed price – does not exist; attacking price and on the other hand, enduring price attacks
• do not get embarrassed by splendour
• have an alternative for 'Eastern Front'
Mediation
Solving conflicts in the presence of third party
Usually cheaper than court verdicts
Gives better results than court
Mediator's tasks:
•determining schedule of talks
•gaining approval from both sides of conflict
•controlling communication between sides
•identifying cases and recognizing problems
•individual meetings with both sides of conflict
•proposing solutions
•threatening (sometimes) with an arbitrary solution
References:
1. Komunikowanie się w marketingu, praca zbiorowa pod red. H.Mruka, Wydawnictwo AE,
Poznań 2005.
2. Pietkiewicz E., Etykieta menedżera, CIM, Warszawa 1998.
3. Thomson P., Sposoby komunikacji interpersonalnej, Zysk i S-ka Wydawnictwo, Poznań 1998.
4. Cialdini R., Wywieranie wpływu na ludzi, Gdańskie Wydawnictwo Psychologiczne, Gdańsk 1996.
5. Covey St. R., 7 nawyków skutecznego działania, Wydawnictwo MEDIUM, Warszawa 1996.
6. Goleman D., Inteligencja emocjonalna, Media Rodzina of Poznań, Poznań 1998.7. Leary M., Wywieranie wrażenia na innych. O sztuce autoprezentacji., Gdańskie Wydawnictwo Psychologiczne, Gdańsk 19998. Sisson C. Podróż w głąb siebie, Wydawnictwo MEDIUM, Warszawa 20009. Tyszka T., Psychologiczne pułapki oceniania i podejmowania decyzji, GWP, Gdańsk 2000.10. Gesteland R.R., Różnice kulturowe a zachowania w biznesie, PWN, Warszawa 2000.11. Karras G., Dobić targu, Businessman, Sopot 1992.12. Kennedy G., Negocjacje. Jak osiągnąć nową przewagę negocjacyjną. Business Press, Warszawa 1999.13. Kennedy G., Negocjować można wszystko. Jak za każdym razem dokonać udanej transakcji. Studio Emka, Warszawa 1999.14. Mitnick K., Sztuka podstępu, Helion, Gliwice 2003