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c_ np#:
Vl.+F.#,!;iiT,#
strffig& tr#s#werlt !rrrt lrer SOtE{t} ;r{id spent a few
mi}nt[]5 v*&l[Jilt*t 'E^ing *shuman rigl-rts *bs*rvers and
theer or"l drinking-14r'a{e!"c*ns{r'uction prt{ects in a paE"t sf
the cccintr3' {il;lf haq* g$$lein{r: arrned re}:el}ion agailrst
t}re &4e.qic*n g$1/er-fiH}e&t' g{}r-etrosflect, as a
clueless kid in a !val-zorle lvha cor"lldn'tspeak the local
langu;lge and had all ttre cofilmon sense of.your average teenage
pttnk {-CIcker, I probably desenved tor,vind tlp in $srne se{'{ ofl
pris*m r:e- tvstrse" Btlt that dicl n$ttrappen. {ndee{*, { gcr{ a
new. lease *n iife.
,{!tli*ugh ['al ]reen ara activist arad had sclne
pcii{icalheliefs, *r*stly rippecl frcrn Fretn:aga*dfii t3'-rics nr
thevaric*s h{ax'xist pamphiet ['d {*ave fying anound {&y
rs$st{* scare ft}y g}arents" going ts Mesic* ;ans$
w'ifnessinggenuin* social stnuggie s.slade a big iunpressi*n st]
rne. A[ arlage r+'he* t mighet filsre sensihly laave be*c? gett *g
a nlcearseless liberal arts c*l{ege degree, { lvas irestead
pirkingc*rn igl a village with fu{ayar* peasarats lvhc had chased
off{lrcir **ra| };rftdswner' ',q.'i{h gutrs ;Es}d t}"}n flacei{
dcwn t$re
Mes ic;alt {AT {Ti y* " &4exrceilvas a$:uzz rs'i{h
p*litica-lnebetr&iqln irn tire 9*s, and;ll{hnug}r it w'as not
mycountry, the ideas arlddreanes cf the futrexicanleft gave !fie a
valuesysteru and itrspiratinll abit urore sciici tllan soilleshitty
Canadian pop-punkbanrt's lyr ics. I c;arne b;rckto tt le US a
ceimmittedlefltist. and werlt c}r} a*spend the n*xt riecadervorking
t* nverlht'owcapi ta l ism in *neirl*alistit; halt inr:{J
*s:tiv*v'enttrre ;ef,{er {lsq: x*xf.
trv{:rt'{:l sltap*:d i:,v l,;.llin
',1,.1::rt;.i.\'41::i#t!+ ,;;"i i
j.::t:i. I.: t i l . l
Arnr:r'ic:all srx:i;llisru" Wh;r{ever'[ ]rrtsrv i* lilr:, I
h':*riled i{fr'*ml *l,t1t";tn,$:{rr7rt# *f' rev*luti** in tlrr:
Arnq-:t'is;lls."{ltls;2" c*nfir:*e:e} *sr page 3...
WffigffiffiK- dmgru ffiK?dffgsff'eg&ryro 6m &amBy |im
Ride
W8ren tr rv;rs $9 I spei-a{ haB$ a yeen trave$ing ;lr*undMexica
with a frieeld. I spcke ss litt{e Spaaaish then {?l;ltla'tlera
varic*s anai*r everlts *f all*ri*rl.l Mexir;an fuist*rywculd happen
arsilnd us. I bare?y u*eiers{r:sr.i m."ir"tt ryashappexixeg, much
tress {he *ppcrt*xti{ies aard d-ar:gee-s wer.vere exg*csir-rg
*ursetrves t*. L-ike,lve r,vere in &{e.uic* Cinyw'fuen the
s{{.ederets *f &4exiilcJ'suniversitv sv:;ters s.n'ent cu{o*
strike'aaad *ccr-rpied their *carilpuses and buildings"Sparn and I
had nret som1str:den{s and needed a piaceto stay. tr could vaguelv
figureout that tl.ley rvere *ff'ering alsa place to crash, and as
w'emade ouil way overLrarricaries anr} past miii{arycheckpaints
in{o a rnassivecr:ilege r*arplex that hadcieariy heen recently
f;:kenover by flrlrce drrring a vi*lenlprcte-st. it !"rr:gan {*r
dar,vn onruc {h;et s*m*{l"ling hlg t}aat I .irir{ic-}n't
etreclenstand lv;as y*t*iazg'::,;:''t&;it:tt tlgtr'tl, ;tltcl
illilybr'r tr Eli**ltl ,,i't:x,h.:-r.lr: 3iu1s,:r'l*s, t* {l:*se
;re.lriirti;l llgr,r;lgt'r [r:;t r*i rlg fl t3riE{:] { I
{}slmfci*:r lri{tin,q {itq: r"txlci. :ts if {ha.t rv'irstl't
r'lltt:ttX4ft. ;;[t.tx' ;,1srriu{}r *t living irusirl*: lir*
{jH,&M *{urtr*:tll. stt'ih* t:f"-{.}ii, lvt'l
-
" We got drunk with some hookers at our hotel bar, andthen wound
up having a fistfight with each other in ourhotel room in which the
only things that got brokenwere my glasses, a wooden table and our
dignity."
lt was rn"y college.
'l-his year" rny twenties are conring to an end. And so,
itrnoukl seeul" is the dream of L.atin Amenican sor;ialism aswell.
What CInce looked like an inevitable tide of revolutionhas been
decisively defeated * in part hry {"J3-backeddictators anrl cleath
squarls, but also by Coca*Ccla er.ncl &tTV,eEer:toral
ref'*r'misrtr ancl political reality. Mq:st countriesd*w'll ttrere
totlay lrave treft*Ieaning gCIvernrnents, krr."lt none*f'theln are
ahout to kill {he bourgeoisie arid erubark on
making a utcpian society.This seenrs like a fitting realization
to d;rwn on nle as
rlly olvn revolutionary twenties draws to a close - you wakeup
one day ter find yourself kind of an old rnan, a unionI:ureaucrat,
an aging poli{ico with biils to pay who rnosttikety ivitrl not be
rnemorializectr by stattee on plaque in apost-revolutionary
workers'paractise in the future. So as afarewetrl present anrJ fond
goor{bye to a fun but ultirnatelyfruitless decade spent enthralled
by thre dreatn of Latin.&rnerican socialisnre, { decided {his
year to rnake o{}e rnorevisit south of the border, to the last
rernaining holdsutagainst the capitalis{ tieXe of prcgress.
Cuba - the rCIgue state 90 rniles south sf'Miarni, defyingand
infuriating Yankee irnperialists f'or half a century madeCuba {hre
first {and, ultimatetry, last} socia}ist state in t}rervestern
hernisphere. As far as I coutrd tell, the Cqibans*cialist
gCIvernment was on its last legs - a totteringecCI{}c}my and a
decrepit p*litical dictat*rship that, fon all itsmerits, was
pr*bably not going to survive much l*nger nowthat fridel Castro had
terminal cancer. tr wanted to see ttbtfcre i{ was gCIr}e. The
nevoh-r{icnary }irn of his 20s" andtlae e'evclutionany dream cf
Latin America, slowly ccnring tca {:lose, having sne last er}core
on reuarinn {ogetllen. Myl:*usenrate Eriarr saic}, "i-{el} yeah,
Cntrirnlbtrs sucks inFel-x-uary fir]],bv;r,v"'" and a rn;igaein*
writer frienr] of *trnsn;rr*sd Aareler i*ined up ;;n lq'e$l.
Ttrr-ee ;rgir:g pr"ulks orrv;lca{i** in th* w*rk*fs" paradise.
saying fuilelw:ll 1* ttlt:rdli{u# sta{e bcf*lr thc gcvernryr*nt
{alls and tlre Mianrir:xiles r-efurn.
ll's ttc?rnic;*lly,' illeg;-rl f*r dsxr*e'it:a** fs"r visi?
L}"rh;e" $* yeiulu:lvt: t* g* {r: Li*r.rthern h4*.xir:* f irsf,
llt"l{.1 t}}{*i fly *v*r fr.rl{ar'l;r-ra {r-*rn t$"1*:r'e.'l'hc}
{.il};an r:rrs{tllns p**g:lt': krrrlw crl}{ ls:s{;lnegr.1,'{}{Ir
gr;essp:*i'tr, r.;c:;rll v*n r'*:*lly ltelvcr 1{}
lv{}r'ilv'afi*utis ihsl p:l;.nl*s {htln-rstrlvex. &4;rny
l{igfrts {* Culu,r *n *k}Sr:liir,r{ q:rr;r ;,lirr;r';lf{ ;ers: nq:t
*luacLiy rrp t# &ffieriql;e* s;lfl,rt-vc-:$**,1$" ;l:td ;iis{}
riglflf "willpg ;rr*xi-{J;rstl'* $.r:rr"*r-is{s st-lpgr*llr::d*:1,
*rrr'$*r]r-rlr"rrry)**t ll;:vr;r hElen krrctrvrr tr* blr:ev erg:
f'li54lltx i*ttlFl;av;ln;r, Lik"* l\t;tl tirlrE: ilr {$l* ?{ls
l}rs,:v kitrl#r! ;* 3:[;:ne,: TmLl tst{-rrirasr ttt:rurg*l 'x rvilh
a pi;rnttlrf }:*nrh {tlrz{zxt iSrtr ' l ' futltwt.x'st ;:\t.l^
*fi';,lii'liucl tt:.t"r*t"i*tyr itr tht.l ltx.i:r'eli*tr:tlr,::tt:t
gtt't*r tt 1J"11
was ac{ually funded and suglporter} lry our
fdovernmsnt!}"Anyways, orltr flight r,vas fine, althougtr Sri;-rn's
dir{y andclamaged passpCIrts bl'ir:{}y gave Ctrhan sectenity
sornecCIncet'xls [h;rt rve migtrt be CIA spies (a sec;cnd laCIk;rt
nnrriirty. disheveled clotl"ring rnust leave assur-ed {}rern that
itwe were indeed spies, it cor.rkl only be for a truly
failedc*untrv* of no threat to them).
We traveled arounetr Cuba fbr the better part a{';l
lnontrh-going to Cienfuegos. l'rinidad anqi Santa Clara hut
spendinl4rn*st of our time in l{avana" Which, by the way, is
t}re
coCIlest city I'r'e ever been to. trrnagine an incredibly
ornate,beautiful cXd mansiol-r, abandoned and left to rot
anddecornpose for decades. Now irnagine that rnansion is anentire
city, anri inlrabited hy the cocles{ five neillion peoplein thee
hemrisptrere. ,A, visit t$ any foneign country revealsvarious
colorful cultural eccentricities. but Cirba takes it to{hee
extreme. For instance, arffi n-atin American countrieshave tons of
s{ray dogs tryixrg to survive on []re sfreet * br:tin Cuba, for
reasons that remain rnysteri*us, all the straydogs are tiny breeds,
wieerer dogs m*stiy. Another {hing:Cubans love baseball. so much so
{Frat there is all entirepark in downtown [{avana, that all day and
night is filledwith hundreds of Cuban Enen, who come there
specificallyto debate anct argue abor.lt ttre local basebaltr
league wi{heach other. When you first see it, it looks }ike a
srnall riot isabout to ttrrn yiolent, dozens of rnen screaming at
eachothler, shaking fists and waving arms - but this is just
theirvension of sports talk radio. Screaming sports fans.
stan,inglviener dogs, classic 50s cars, cnurnbling
mansi*ns,governrnent-sponsored anti*imperialist rallies, t*ns of
icecream but no vegetables, anrtr a multi-racial society thatseems
almost irnpossrbly diverse and integrated - Cuba's alteltr of a
sighl.
I guess what eveilyCIn wants tc knorv is, ilr:w hass*cialism
rvcrked *ut {br tLre tuha*s. It's abcl:t r+,hat y*urq'*nkl expec{.
iln t}"lel *ne !ra*d, Cuba tras better pt*licservices tl"lan tl're
res{ sf La.ticl r\trreriq;;l - {*6r*nr:tchhealtl"rcars"
eclarca{irln ;lnd spr:r"ts iar:ilifies, and a s*r:ials;:filty net
that preivides ;r b;lsic st;lsrr!;rrtl of living t* everyC*ban.
Cuba is lh*: i:**{ plar:* !n l.atin ,4*rr:rit;a to bc potlr,tluet's
fqlr sur"c. But *n tlr* *ther ha*d, sclr:i;)lisrn l'l;ls
ximp;ly{aikx! {* r:rs;:te ,:lny ra'*:;llth"^fhq:ir eu#r}{}r:}y is
ri*ing a li{tle:lmtfe:r tslal;ry tlurn it w;rs in thr: cl;lrk days
*f th* *arly Q0s,a{'tr:r lNle c*lla6:s* *f tlr*,: $*vi*t tlnion
{th*n {.r.rhil's rnninr$alglrr" tl*ddy] yslu*,a.t:r.1 {l'ls:ra,r
in{* ihe,l d;lrh {:}FI{r$ in a sur{ef**;,ertd cll;u:tic w;l--v.
I':ilr *v*r';11tr, thr:r'* iu very lit{le rniltt:r'i;lln"vq:;alih
ll"rr:c"r:. I k**r+' plc*l,v r.lf l-rig:6ricx wh* r*i6gfut thisrh
{fintx*frilcJs jlrx{ f in
-
irave errough fbreign exchange rurrency to buy vegetablesto
f'eed the isiand. The foocl is withrout a doubt the rvorst Itrave
ever experienced.
I'owards the end of, our month there I was experiencingwhat I
carne to call vegetable madness, a state of delirir.rrncaused by
not eating anything green for too weeks in arow. I started trying
to bribe wairers tcr bring me an extratomato or wlratever, and they
would laugh in nry face"',Nohav, no hav, loco." This paradox
betlveen a ftrnctionalwel{'are state that keeps people edr.rcated,
heal{hy andscure, and an econorny so prirnitive you don't get
enoughtc eat on a regular basis is reflected in a popular ioke
inFtravana. -'what are the accornplishrrnents cf the
revorution?Flealtlrcare, education and sports. sfhat are llre
failnres ofthe revolution? tsreakfast, lunch and dinner."
Hopefullywhen lrirtel finally kicks the bucket, his brcttrer Raul
will beable to inlplerulent sorne rnarket neforms in partnership
withthe Chinese governrnent aimed at s{irnulating someeconomic
growth, Betrieve rne, as a longtime lefty who hatescapitalism anctr
the rich l do not like admitting that there aresome good things
atiout free markets and econornic growttr.But rvhat can I say?
Vegetable rnadness is no fun, people. Asociety either produces
rvealth or it starves. Most cubansseem to rryant ttre forrner.
Overall, ['d have to say that I gof a n]rlr.e
favsrableimpression of the Cuban system than I expected. We
rnetmany penple, over and over", who told us that they likedtheir
systern and ttrought it would last. A gcod exarnpre ofthe sort of
thing the cuban governrnent does a gocd lob atis public safety.
tr've been almost everywhere in LatinArnerica, ancl almost been
rnurdered a few tirnes and I cansay without a rloubt that Cuba is
the saf'est place in theentire ccntinent. There is almost n*
l,iolent cr:irne. Tlris is aresult of both good and bad things,
br:t it iust reinforces theoverall feeling of stability ancl
security tlult Cuban socialisnr
provides. Safe streets are no small accornplishment ifi thatpart
of the world - if you look at opininn polls af LatinAmerican
countries, the biggest ccmplaint is the extremelyhigh levels nf
violent crirne. Indeed, Mexico is at thismoment engaged in a civil
war betlveen its drug cartelsand its g{rycr{}m*:nt. whic}r the
government is losing,because the cartels c*ntrol a plood chunk cf
thegoverrlillent. Ileadless hcelies in the strclel ansl
cons{arutkidnappings are nn fun, and they're als* prcbably
nevergoing ilway in Mexico, because o{}ce your palir:e anrl
arrnyget ccmprnmised and turned irrto a crirninal drug gang,they
become very hard to clean up. Cutra'on {he o{helhand? When they
first discfiver*d evidence a couple *f theirsenior rnilitary
figures had becorne cornplicit with clnrgsxtuggiing. ttre
govelnfilent maele them ap*trogir.e orrtelevision and then
executert them. Norry f&a/b a countrythat intends tn keep drug
violence away from its people.
We had a lot of fun in Cuba. We went 1o all snr'ts of
cooluluseums about different aspects of the revolutisn ancltheir
society {w}iich our c}reapskate rnagazine writer friendrvas always
trying t* rip ofl shcplifting frorn gift stores andother smart.
atlryrirable behravior like that). We did some bikeriding, beach
ctrilling, hiking and exploring. We trung out ina punklgay bar in
Santa Clara on drag queen nigtrt,drinking bathtub rum frorn
refilled olcl bottles r.vith thehottest !trromen on earth, i.e. gay
Cr-rban cross*elressing rnen.I took a lot of pictur-es. Brian ate a
lot of vile street food.Aaron tried to chisel a lot of poor
people.
We hrappened to be in l-{avana on Valen{ines Say" Wewere missing
girls back horne, and in Cuba it's hard to useernail and impossible
to call ,America. 5o, we did the naturalthing: We got drunk with
some lrookers at our hotel bar,and then wcund up having a fistfight
with each other inpur hotel room in which the only things that got
brokenwere my glasses, a wooden table and our dignity. Such is
F,F.X;.!4
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-
the trarreling [ife. The rnorning after ttrese events {he
threeof us had various states of hangovers and injury, and I
wasnewly blind. We were planning to catch a train to anothercity,
and we lirnped and dragged our carcasses to multipletrain station,
but the train had already left. Or maybe it wasnot leaving at all?
Or perhaps we, as f'oreigners, were notaltowed to ride these
trains? $lrnuld there be another train?Yes, some sairl. No, other
schedules clairned. &{aybe, perhaps,wfro the fuck knows.
Confusion reigned sug:reme at everytrain statiCIn in tr-{avana. It
ycu ever r,vant a good critique ofsccialism in practice, visit a
Cuban train station. Ancl if youever want a gootl critique of
.yourselfl visit one whilehungover and sore the day after you and a
good friencltried to drunkenly murder each other over a p;rir of
brokenglasses in a dingy hotel rCIofil.
I rernernber looking around that rnorning, at theridiculously
non-functional train stalion, and at the three eifus, looking
somehow dirtier and mcre pathetic than eventhe starving stray
wiemer dogs atrl around. It occurred to methat me and rny
friends'twenties had been like the Cubanexperiment with socialism
itself * inspireel by noble icleas,but had not worked out as
planned or troped, but ultirnatelya worthwhile ride. I originally
came to Cuba ttrinking thatiust as rny twenties were about to end,
so was rny faith inrevolution anctr the Cuban socialist government
about to endas well" After experiencing Cuba I am having
secondthougtrts. Ferhaps rny idealism will stick anound
anothertlecade after all. And maybe the Cr.rban workers'
paradise,that rogue state cunsing at us frorn just 90 rniles south
ofFlcricla, will last a bit longer as well.
J,1
4.
-
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T a.n *,*ve.1*[r *i e* t.it*rrl *ar:s:il$,s '-nue$,,,: ,' ,., .
i ; , :
udEt's m H*ffffie.wt*war$b {*,$e$s$' , ''*$x*m,pqm$$s.rsi&
$,trBi#ss,,8?6*lw wtr*S pwmpBe,'mrm, *wfr grg, ;
, . , , , , . , , , . , i , i : . * ' . . , . , , . . , . ,. . ,
, , . : ; : . , . . : ; ' . , . ; . , :.' ' ' . ' ' '1r ' ' ' ' . '
: : : :
. : , . , , : ' ' , ' , . . ' , ' . ' ' : ] ,1. , i . . : : : .
r : : : : : . . : : i . : r :
: ' . . . , . . . . , . rL. . , . : . 1: ' : , , . . . : , : : .
: : : , r , . ' . . : . . , . ' : . . . . . . , . t . , . , . : ' :
: : , .
fu* AS{fu F$mffis*?t, ! l : : : : ! . r : ! r . , : , : : . : :
: : : : ' : : r . ' l , : : ' ' . : ' , i
, . : . , : , . . ' : " : ' , . ' . . . , : , : , : . : : : : :
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Cabgt genl ' ' ' , ' , ' ., ' : . ' , ,. ' ' ' . ' ' ' , , 'ip i
p6,-g*4,r. in *p*ecir nrl*'tt*nr:1rr g cljem*..!: : : , : , , , i ,
, , . . ' . . ' : , . : . . ,1 ' ! ' , : ' ' , , . ' , ' , , : ' .
' : , , r ': : r . . . . . . . : : , . . : . . . . . : . : .1: . .
:1
ffi.ffi'mp$n$#sk #ff ffieee-rsBa#es fum$ng fffn*d ffi
i : . l r ! : l : . i : i r : iI alt:;it|:j:i
i : : i i , l : : l i : r :
I c;;l*'t hr,:Jit,:r'r:r it cli
-
JRidiculous horror movie
*si:*il*rs in**irqic}d*
Ok. I have sern way above rny share of goofy, ridiculous, funny
and bloody moviet but this is for sure a 9.5 lO in all of
rhosetields, ll points in ttre blood field. I don'l know what it is
]yith lapalese pople bul sorns of 0reir movies gel goofy as fuck-
It'soverloaded with gor-e, but ir the same style as "Dead Alive,"
wherc rnosl of it is so ol/er the top and bloody thal you cant
helpbu1 laugh your ass olT aboul inslead of feel bad for
people.
The basic plot of 'Tokyo Gore Police" (without spoiling the
movie more than I am in the review) is a mad scientist makes avirus
and spreads it across the nation, a virus which makes you homicidal
with rabies type stuff. Sounds like a normal movieright? Hell IIo!
As soon as these "engineers" (the people ilfected with the virus]
have a limb ripped/blew/cut olT or a receive amiior wound an odd
weapon grows in it's place. There is a guy with a chainsaw hand
after his arm is ripped ofli a guy withguns for eyes (and an
exposed brain), oh yeah, and this crealion here, which I could
never see being done by anyone otherthan the lapanese.
On ll"re gCIre factor this movie has tons,rvci{'d -ass special
costumes hased off reallyfir really good drugs, {:Gstume$ Iike
these:
i
Of course there has 10 be a hero involvcrt, all atlractive Asian
woman in a short skirt who is manic depressive and slils.lrerwrists
ihe entire movie (which is really the only gore in the movie th'1t
made me cringe). For some reason a small chunk of thismovie
glamoriz.es slitling your wrist. Anyway, she runs amund 'lbkyo
dressed as a prostitute lrying ro calch the bad guy, wlro iskilling
tlimps, whores and iohils all over'l'*kyo. Shr: tras a swCIrd
hidden in her umbrella.
A.s fbr any ovcr tlre tnpgore-horror f'lick, tlrere illltst tre
a nrassacre at ttre end, and there's a hell of aof this: Private
copri killing fvrll/ citiz-en in the city to etlsure thel-e are tlo
engiueers to hrrrt citizens. Olt,wfirn;*n's ;lrnrs and legs learing
her apart.
For sur:h a ritliculous novie it actually delves prelty deep in
the story and sticks to the plot prelly well, for some reason.if
you are into blood, guls, r:hir;ks with alligators for legs, e.vil
cops, sword fighls and tumors, this is totally tho utovie for
you.You can watch it streaming online at
www.asian-horror-movie.com/tgp.php (which is an amazing websile by
the way).l\,latt Tald raring:8rl0, bitchirr'.
6
tons and more tons. I-ike I said, think "Dead Alive"" 'l'trere
are also really surreallidicslous ideas yorr can really orlly come
up with if you have really'had problems
massacre in the endand cars strapped fo a
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lly Cru |ones
Ir airl't DIY but it was free and it's not like we'll be
buyingany of tllose cars that look like they have Down
Symdrone'
Someone asked why lvould Scion sponsor a metal festival?It
m;rkes sense demographicatly. Most of those attending werewhite,
ntale, educated ald have or lvill have money one day.
Well, either that ar solneone in Toyota's marketingdepartment
just really likes rnetal.
Prior to the festival my friends dicln't know what to
think.Should we support a corporation like'l'oyota? Will we have
toput up with tons of advertisernents? Hell, we dicln't even knowif
we'd get in trecause cur free tickets cail]e with a warning
thatsaid "arrive early, no adnnission guaranteed."
Everything from the f'ree shuttle that ran between
theNewport/Bernies to Circuslskully's, will call ticket pickup,
andthe bands (big name vs. local, good variety, decent sound),
wentabout as well as you could exPect.
Still, we're not buying one of those stupid-looking cars.
ffi
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- Banned beersI ly Anthony1I 8in Bo$ larf playe.l a show at n
lrar ttlr Parsnrrs. lwas rlropped off in the;rlk:ys sornewherc ofl
l|rytlen 10 finish lhe B[s{jhI talllxrv my older brother gave rne
(l didn't warlt to drink it in the car). I lell rny br{}ll}ors. onc
who pronisr:d to see me later atI the show wilh some girl. I went
insidc and mel up with Max's parents who ponl cd me ba'el fi'orn
their piichor. I had money butI l lost rny ll) somewhere. I sal
wilh .lohn and drank the beer Max's dad galc hirn. Vhat a nico
guy-I "Who a{c we playing wilh.l: "t.. doril even know, mal. Some
pop prnk shit from oul of town or somelhing."J 'Oh, cool. We w$n't
sound anything like them." The bal. was "paying" us in free beers,
so I asked Max lo gtlt mine. IleI was hesitant, because he s
-
sttlr,y and I lrr:iir,:vcd [l]nr tnr:, bet;lrusc lre really i.s
a t:t'ar"yrntltflrrrfur;kcr. We ptr;r,-'rld the strrnri after t[rat
antt it sirched, ilrs';is really lame. lW3' hrurlr*:r did his
ir-ecstylc br"rt y*rt cctrkln'fIu,r;rr it uvtx' the guit;.1r. uf
{:*r^u';*. X kicked hinr olT *l t}rt s{;rgr:*fter a wirile. Af'ter
th* sht:ra', Mux anrl fohn i*{'t t*gr:tl:er in.$t:rrrf'.r]*r*
t:lsr's van that fchn lultl hnrr*rveq.l" ,\t3' br'*fh*r, tlrisgia{
;xrei I u'tr"c sl"rpg:*sed ftl g*t ;l ride {r*ut tn,t' cttttsirr,
btrt nrc:didn't ;ln$\,$el. his n:l"rnne and is rtctr.il'i*r.ni l*r
ditr;lii*g. Iltlriitch*d my hr'*llrqrr :llt*r th*-y" tliri
sr:nre':lhing illttg;:l ierst twr:da,v.x befbre" &{,v
brr:tlx:r' rvils tlt.{t:rnrined ilrr* fliis girl lu'lsrvhilrinSX
ilb*ut lvalking l:aek trl th* s*ulh cnd. It wasn'l th*t bi"11*L ;l
rvalk, re*ll.v, **ly ahcut tlqr* antl a half v*iles in ;:
x{i';lightline *n sitklwalk. tle {*ld us tc rvait cutside asxl
rvlterr I r.vasrclling this guy ;lbout why sr:rr:anrirrg vr:cals
weren't as trite antlstuJ:id as o;lrlra v*citls t:yer guitar., my
br*llrer cilrne backoutside. When he rvas in [frere ]rt: distracted
tlris st;,llf persr]r]ar:d lvlrile shfl lvasn't lonking he tnak
everything ttrat rv;ls in {ltet*p drawcr uf their {ncl bcr whiclt
rvas bar:kst;rge" F{e trad apair af Vise grip pliers, ;l file and a
couple of big lls( hc;:dsrrE:wdriver$, l?e rvaited sn the sielewalk
outsirle *f the barwhile he lvent lo steal fhe car that was parked
next t* it, Bel'r:rehe got it starterl ;r cop rolled dorvn Parsans
and tapped hisbreaks right outside af tlle bar" Me and this girl
stared at tl"recop and lve lvere sure we were going to go to jail.
'l'he cclprolled r:n and we were safe, we thought. My trrotlrer
appearedfrcrn arsund the corner later, spitting crushed saf'ety
glass andpulling it [l-om his pockets. I never even heard the
windowbreak"
"You see that? Shit, I threw the screwdrivers up on the[-{e
didn't see rne or he would have stopped. T}iat r,vas tltehardest
colurnn to peel ever!"We only had ta walk to German Village when my
brother calledhis stepdad and he picked us up. F-le was still
pulling glass frornhis trrockets and I still couldn't rernember
ever hearing awind*w break.
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-
" WE$COMIC" t{}ntinued fi'om page 16...!F: Ftrave y*u tried tr:
ptrslr ttee strip int* tl'r*se venus a?. all?
ffi#: I've irad very little $qxtcess at tryi*g t* push rxry way
innxrywhere. I'd rather spenci ti"lat {irne working cn ttle
ccuricrs.
$F: What is intriguing abeiut {he cc}rnic $tri$} as a
f$rrxlat?
*6: N* csre takes it s*ricusly"
$F: Because all they ran see is the trnditirur;il grernmer clf
ig?
ffiS: fven rvhe:-r corrrics {rar:scenderl leiw al't f* bec*nle
Mausand Kun t?ege |r, {he csrnic *{r'ip with the gag at {he end
stayedbehind.
!F: Why dtl you thirrk that is?
SG: i rl*n't k*urv. btrt I like it.
$F: Is that akin to the snusic ?he Basement Apar-tments
does'l
SG: The $a$Ie is true wittr everything I make.
!F: Cor.rid you get away with saying the same thirrgs i* Cat
andGlrJ with*ut having a humsr"sris veneer to it?
*&: t had an English teacher in high schc*l who told {I}e
mywriting would be bet{q:r if I wasn't trry'ing to be funny. But
thefr.rnny parts r&'ere d"re point, arud are the point * ttre
rest of thecontent is iust the chewimg hum that holds it
tagether.
$F: Who h*s, tr gue$s, "infqrrr,led" y*u hur*cr?
ffi#: fo{att Groening, Nathalriel West, newspaper coxnics,
"Rttoda,"|*ten Waters and Euro{.}ean fiistnry.
$F: So you hang *ut witir slther pe*ple rvleo rnake c*mics?
33#: I have a fr"ie*r} whs] xrifi'kes cnr*ics. W* see eactr
stll*ri:ecause *ur ha*rds play togcther-. { r!*n't r*ally traxtg
*r"rt withother pe*ple whu make cerrnics lust br:c;mse they make
cornics.
$F: ,Are rlrene peclple yolr {rr:residen trl h* pleers?
*#: *th*r p*elpll* rvB:* c*a-alv ilclxslics cln thc trntr:rlte{,
I guess.f}**ple ;*s:l*ili;)le:ql wi{h th* Tr:g*a{ur* rvehslt*,
tlarntgh I c*nxirierxll *f t*x*xc: p**6rl* f'rrffi degr**ls rr;*re
pur:flessir'll {han X arn {amddsscr^s'eclly s*,}.
$F: trVh;rt e3* y** $:nv* t* elcal wlfh {*c}tnic*l}y in
publisht*g ar*rnir; strip rslr't ttt* trtrternxrt? Ar"r t*r*:rt:
n:allrlwidtfi rrenc*r$ls {x"alp*n{ing {^:#{?{:*}:}}s? {}r. ;ar*
th*:r'* g:r'*}:i*ms with tlt* sqlrvic;*g:rciviti*r'l
ffiffi:'lh* f*w firnr.,rs fi:*rtElrryiqnth h&s
hc:r:$ill*;trr is*ue l3r*;lnatr*s{Ilxs k*a:l'r v*ry k"i*d" t*
x*s"r. fu{$*{ clf'qh* h:r:h*ir:;rtr ixsx*ls i havet*t* 1z.tsl. -
atry:*rnir;*l i$s*t:s" l.*sr r'*r*nth ia lVei:"tlpx"*xs
t"tyirn*t*etrrl*rt in ;ln {}I-r"t}r, anel sttdriexltr? ft d;etnhms*
was nlisslnp;. Ikn*w ****gh xfu*uf l*:t;furlic;*l issu*s l* *r;rke
rxys*}f respi*.lrrxi3:l*f*lr tfreffi. hu{ fic}{ en*t'lgfl tfaa{ if
r}**sn't {xke; rit# *ntil't:ly l*nl*ng,}ff: Wr:r* y*u
;:ltrr:*;.tt|y am:t*xfq"rn:t':rJ f* th;lt {;*g:*:l *['f
-
$F: So even though you are making products /brancl/etc yorl
still "feel bet{er" than the alteppative?
ffiG: No, not at all.
$F: |ust a rli lemrna then?
DG: I'm willing to sell people stuff they don't need if it means
I can get by on a day-to-day basis. I can hope that Iin
srrbstituringmy sluff for someone else's sluff and not increasing
the sum tolal of stuff in the world, but I don't know.
lP: Vere you surprised by the demand for "stuff' besides your
book?
DG: There's not a huge demand, and what there is had Lreen
growing very slowly. (At least until the economic collapse of
theworld, when {hat stopped.)
fP: I say surprised because Cat and Girl has a strong feel of
capitalist critique to it, so maybe sorneone who liked it a lot
wouldnol necessarily want to buy it. Are you able to live off of
that demand even thotrgh it is not huge? Or do you have to
supplemenlir?
DG: I wash my clothes in the sink, but I do make a living from
comics.
IF: Is that about rhenormal situation fbr amore popular
webcomic?
DG: The few times I'vei-ead about peopledetermined to make
aliving rnaking theirwebcomic, they usuall.yhave a goal in mind- an
amount of moneY peryear that will allow themto leave their job.
Thisamount is always morethan I have evermade. (These aren't
peoplelvith unrealistic notions *they are people who
haveaccomplished their goal.)
|F: Sort of off topic: Wereyau doing zines beforeyour friend
suggestedwebcomics?
SS: I was pril]{ing cfixi}ics riut at a cCImputer lab and
pasting t}rem up ar'ound town,
$F: *id y$u feel c$rlrlec{ed to'"zine ci*ti}r's."i
a$pects *f that {;ul[{Jre * thre lrand*rad* r:p:li[ar:t,
* br-rt thery h*th c*g*nder a l{it *f niche t*pir,, *iit
$G: {i;irner-s v*rsrrs v{.lg;e{}$ rvit}a fuic-'icfes"
$P: tinattll*tic;.!l;ifil{: l* fut: r*Jc-{:. tf*s {,af "zt}d
{;irl brNlnSuhversivt: Onli ne Car-t*on i,sts'/
SG: Nope.
antlrol*gizt:d firr{side *{ fhe h*tlk 'l'*d lt;lll r]{iife{t,
Attitutk: .:l:'l'hilj N**.v
S#: The first fwo {at and Sirf pa&lic,alies}s w*{'e
lirttr{,: zir}es, and I liked fi!;trlyth*l persnilatr
cern{nur}icatisn - but I never ir*t $ikei a F}firt #f ir"iF: [t
$eems ]ik* rvelm*rfti{j$ slurre a lllt with aines trite
*hs*rv;,rtielfi. f gucs$ctxlcc{"r}9.
15
-
Cats, girls and webcomicsAn interview with Dorothy
GambrellDorothy Gambrell is the creator of 1he long running and
overly educated webcomic titled Cat and Girl that
successlullyslraddles the line belween knock-knock ioke and
philosophical dialogue. Gambrell also produces humorous/sad
infographics atverysmallarray.com, keeps an ongoing document of how
she spends other people's money at Donation Derby and made
anoltrerstrip (now dead) called "The New Adventures of Death." One
of her punk bands, The Basement Apartments, has a song aboutJacques
Cousteau. 'l-he other is called fenny and the Holzers. Gmail Chat
from Feb, 23'
|ames Payne: Okay, so to be as general as possible al firsl, why
webcomics?
Dorothy Gambrell: It wasn't a conscious decision. I drew some
Cat and Girl cartoons. A friend of mine liked reading comicsonline
and in 1999 there weren't a whole lot of comics online, so he
suggested I put mine up. I did.
|P: Do you haye interest in publishing where comic strips have
been tradilionally seen? Like allernative weeklies?
DG: I grew up reading the cartoons in the newspaper everymorning
- all of them, even Apartment 3-G. tr do feel a warmthwarmth. In
rny limi{ed experience with print as it exists now, youtowards the
idea of my cartoons in print, but it's a nostalgic
get the editorial limitations of a family-friendly venue with
the miniscule financial returns of the panicky newspaper world.
!F: How does the economic rnodel of your webcomic compare or
contrast with that experience?
DG: lt's decentralized. I use this quote in the beginning ol the
first Donation Derby book "As long as I live under the
capitalisticto be at ttiesystem I expect to have my life influenced
by the demands of moneyed people. But I will be damned if I
propose
beck and call of every itinerant scoundrel who has two cents to
invest in a postage stamp." - lvilliam FaulknerI would rather be at
the beck and call of tens of thousands of people with two cents
than a singular paying entity.
fP: Yeah, a loi of my friends who are "punk" because they don't
like capitalism ended up starting businesses - are webcomicssort of
like that?
DG: Yeah, at a certain point self-created enterprise presents
itself as the altemative to working for olher people. As opposedthe
alternative to some vaguely defined notion of integrity.
^WEECSMIC" continued sn page 14...