By Jeanne Acton, UIL & ILPC Journalism Director and Vicki McCash Brennan, MA, CJE News Writing Let’s talk about …

By Jeanne Acton, UIL & ILPC Journalism Director

and Vicki McCash Brennan, MA, CJE

News WritingLet’s talk about …

News Writing …gives the reader factual information that will affect them or interests them in some way.

• Informative• Interesting• Factual

• News provides readers with all of the five W’s and H, usually in the lead or near the top of the story.

• Leads should begin most often with the what, why or who (if interesting or well-known), NOT with when or where, which are usually the least interesting elements.

• But where do you go from there?

News Writing

Let’s talk about news writing structure.

Advantage: It condenses

information efficiently,

letting readers understand the

basics of what happened

quickly and easily.

Disadvantages: It can get repetitive.It might discourage you from a more creative lead.It can get bogged down with facts and details.

A better way …. The next structure is a modification of the inverted pyramid that allows for more flexibility and is easy for beginning journalists to use.

Use the Transition - Quote (L-Q-T-Q) model for most of your work in journalism.

News Writing

Another model: Modified Inverted Pyramid

• Also called “the hourglass” or “the martini glass.”• Starts with a summary of the event and key facts.• Transitions to a narrative or chronological format.• Works best for crime or disaster stories when you

need to tell what happened from beginning to end.

Another model: The Wall Street Journal format

• Also called “the kabob” or “the circle”• Starts with an anecdote about someone who is

affected by a trend, issue or event.• Uses a “nut graph” or summary paragraph right

after the anecdote to tell the five W’s and H.• Continues with details and quotes.• Ends with a closing anecdote about the same

person who is in the lead.• Best used for feature writing or follow-up news

stories.

For beginning newswriting, it’s best to master the

L-Q-T-Q formula first.

So let’s explore that one …

Direct Quotes

Let’s talk about

Direct Quotes➢ Quotes should be linked to the paragraph before them. The quote should elaborate on the previous paragraph.

For example:After long-time school nurse Emma Stilten died in a car

accident in December, part-time teacher aide Betty Figgs covered Stilten’s responsibilities. Impressed with Figgs’ competence, Principal Stella Reeves proposed keeping Figgs instead of hiring a new nurse. With the savings, Reeves wants to hire a new teacher — a move supported by teachers. “I thought the parents would jump on board with this proposal,” Reeves said. “It will decrease our class sizes and benefit students directly.”

A transition paragraph, adding details.

Parent Raquel Simones said the school should not compromise student safety simply to give teachers a few less papers to grade.

What comes next?

What comes next?From whom?

Parent Raquel Simones said the school should not compromise student safety simply to give teachers a few less papers to grade. “I have a special needs child who is quite fragile,” Simones said. “If he suffers a seizure at school, I want a certified nurse to help him.”

Another direct quote elaborates on previous transition

What follows this?The writer continued with the same speaker. That helps with organization.

Junior GiGi Smith said she also believes the school needs a full-time, certified nurse. Her brother, who will be a freshman next year, has a severe peanut allergy. “A nurse is trained to deal with this medical condition,” Smith said. “A teacher’s aide isn’t. I like Ms. Figgs, but she could panic. That would be very bad for my brother.”

More transitions and quotes (Each quote is linked with a transition above and below it.)

Direct Quotes➢ Should not repeat the transition before them.

For example: Figgs said most of her job is distributing prescribed medicine to students. “Most of what I do is distribute medicine to students,” she said.

This is called a “stutter quote.” AVOID THIS!

➢ Quotes can be longer than one sentence.

Direct Quotes➢ Put the attribution after the first sentence of the quote. (In other words, break the quote in half with the attribution in the middle.)

➢ Attribution should be: Noun then verb. For example:Correct - senior Bob Rodriguez said.Incorrect - said senior Bob Rodriguez.

(unless you have an unusually long title)

➢ Do not place two people’s direct quotes next to each other without a transition.

➢ Add emotion, opinions and life to your story.

Direct Quotes

➢Listen for quotes that tell you how people feel or think about the subject.

➢Don’t quote people on dry, basic facts or description that you can observe with your own eyes. Use facts and description in your transitions.

TransitionsLet’s talk about

Transitions …➢ ARE VERY IMPORTANT. ➢Hold the story together. ➢Link the paragraphs, building bridges of understanding for your readers.➢Provide organization and flow.➢Help create voice.➢And in news writing, they’re really not too difficult!

Hierarchy of Transitions1. Basic transition words (Good)

First, next, then

2. Transitional phrases (Better)For one thingFor instance

3. Internal transitions (Best. Go for these!)Seamless wording embedded within textUse facts, partial quotes and indirect quotes to create these.

For example: FACT TRANSITION

After long-time school nurse Ema Stilten died in a car accident in December, part-time teacher aide Betty Figgs covered Stilten’s responsibilities. Impressed with Figgs’ competence, Reeves proposed keeping Figgs to avoid hiring a new nurse. With the savings, Reeves wants to hire a new teacher — a move supported by teachers.

Transitions in news writing➢Can be fact, indirect quote or a partial quote.

➢ Can be fact, indirect quote or a partial quote.

Transitions

For example: INDIRECT QUOTE TRANSITION

Parent Raquel Simones said the school should not compromise student safety simply to give teachers fewer papers to grade.

For example: PARTIAL QUOTE TRANSITIONReeves said Figgs has done “an outstanding job” since she took over in the nurse’s office.

Transitions➢ Can be fact, indirect quote or a partial quote.

➢Use transitional words to help with the flow as needed. Transitional words include after all, also, finally, in addition, however, otherwise, then.

Transitions

For example:

In addition to cutting the nursing position, Reeves suggested decreasing the number of bus routes.

Can show:– Time– Place– Reasons– Surprise (a twist)– Contrasts– Other connections

To find a transition, look for a connection.

Transitions

• Time transitions– Afterwards, beforehand, later, soon, meanwhile

• Place transitions– In the room, at the beach, down the hall

• Contrasts– Nevertheless, even though, although

• Reasons– Because of, instead of

• Connections– Repeat a key word, concept or phrase from the previous

sentence or paragraph. This is what using partial quotes or indirect quotes can do for you.

Transitions

The transitions are in your notebook! Quotes and facts are good for more than just stringing together and calling it a day …

➢Use parts of the direct quotes to create the transition. And then use the rest of the quote as the direct quote.

Transitions

For example “I never imagined this would become a permanent solution, but Betty Figgs is doing an

excellent job balancing both the classroom and nurse’s office,” Reeves said. “She is very

organized and handles all issues professionally and efficiently. We have not received a single

complaint about the change.

“It actually wasn’t my idea to continue with this plan. It was Ms. Figgs. She loves the

additional duties and feels more than competent to continue next year. Ms. Figgs raised six

children, so she knows a little about sick teenagers. Plus, she agreed to seek additional

training this summer.”

The school has not received a single complaint about

Figgs since she took over the nurse’s job, Reeves said.

“She is very organized and handles all issues

professionally and efficiently,” Reeves said. “Plus, she

agreed to additional training this summer.”

The Transition

Direct Quote

ENDINGS➢Save a summary quote or a well-said phrase to

end with. This is called a “kicker quote.”➢DO NOT, under any circumstances, fall back

on your essay training and write your own summary conclusion. This is editorializing and it has no place in news writing.

➢Avoid ending with a cliché, such as “That’s all, folks.”

➢End with a bang. Save the powerful quote or phrase for last.

What types of leads should you use more?

Where should you place the attribution for a direct quote?

How many sentences can a direct quote be?

What is the purpose of the transition?

What can a transition be?

Following a transition, what should a direct quote do?

Let’s Review …

What can you use to create transitions?

No-Nos for News Stories▪ Using the name of your school or town. Your readers know where they are.▪ Starting with “The School Board …” or some other boring “who.”▪Adding facts for which you have no source or making things up because you think that’s right.▪ Putting attribution before the quote.▪ Missing the news peg.▪ Missing important information and people.▪ Stacking quotes. Use transitions between each quote!▪ Forgetting to use student quotes.▪ Ending with your own summary.

Checklist for News Stories✓ Are the most important and recent facts first?

✓ Is the story accurate? Are the sources identified fully?

✓ Are the paragraphs short?

✓ Is the sentence structure varied in the story?

✓ Is the story neat and double-spaced so that it is easy to read?

✓Does your story flow? Did you use the transition/quote (L-Q-T-Q) formula?

✓ Did you use active voice?

Pitfalls to Avoid **➢ Editorializing. Keep your opinion out of the story➢ Using first and second person. Keep yourself out of the story. Common error: “our school.” No personal pronouns!➢Messy handwriting, poor grammar and spelling.➢ Paragraphs too long. Use only one thought or idea per paragraph. New paragraph for each transition and each speaker.➢ Misspelling names. ➢Trying to use all of the information and quotes you have. Be judicious.

** How to get an D/F or lose a competition …

What will make the difference? **▪ Get the news peg in the lead.▪ Use the L-Q-T-Q formula.▪ Use the right sources and strong quotes.

** How to get an A or win a competition …

Presentation can end here.Next slide provides critique

practice.

What went wrong with this? At Leaguetown High School about 35 students skipped at least one period each school day. The assistant principals said many of the skippers hide in bathrooms, outside the school or in their cars. To reduce truancy, all students will receive new school IDs with built-in tracking devices on April 2, but one parent is working with the American Civil Liberties Union to stop the use of such devices. “This is a blatant violation of my son’s privacy rights,” said parent Don Cantrell. “He doesn’t want someone watching him at all times. No child in the United States should be tagged or tracked.” But Strobinski, who proposed the new IDs, doesn’t understand the concerns. She said, “We will never use the tracking device on them [students] unless they are skipping class or there is an emergency of some type. Plus, the tracking only works at the school.” With the new IDs, administrators will be able to track our students for a range of 200 yards from the principal’s office. “Students will be less likely to skip if they know we can find them quite easily,” Strubinski said. “Students should not have any concerns if they don’t skip class.” “Students who have never skipped should not have to wear such an ID,” sophmore Johnny Rains said.