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BEE R IS JUST SO FREAKING AWESOME
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Beer is so awesome

Jan 11, 2017

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Brian Kelly
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Page 1: Beer is so awesome

BEERIS JUST SO FREAKING AWESOME

Page 2: Beer is so awesome

FIRST QUESTION!

• Anyone need to use the restroom?

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GET TO THE DRINKING!

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THIS IS NOT GOOD BEER

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Beer can actually have incredible flavors and taste!

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A bargain!

Vs.

$ $$$$$$$$

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AND beer kicks wine’s backside

• ….so there’s that

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Craft Beer History• 1920 – Prohibition begins, brewing now sucks• 1933 – 21st Amendment, prohibition ends, everyone

gets druuuuunk• 1965 – Fritz Maytag revives Anchor Steam• 1977 – Michael Jackson (not THAT one) publishes The

World Guide to Beer, begins craft beer renaissance• 1982 – First Great American Beer Festival• 1984 – Jim Koch first brews Sam Adams • 1990s/2000s – Craft beer EXPLODES!• 2008 – Smithsonian magazine says, “The best beers in

the world are being made in the USA”

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The Market

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The other thing that is increasing

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Quick quiz!

• What is the oldest active brewery in North America?

• Answer:

• Molson

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What do you drink at a fancy dinner?

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Would you blink if someone ordered a…

• $20 bottle of wine?• $30 bottle of wine?• $60 bottle of wine?

• What about a $20 bottle of beer?

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Quiz Time!

• How many styles of beer are recognized in the USA?

• Answer:

• 83

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Tasting Beer

• Suck it up!

• No seriously, suck it up! The air really helps.

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Temperature

BUT WHY?

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Taste Buds Map

They don’t work well if they’ve been frozen numb, though…

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Treat it like fine wine!

• Look at it

• Smell it

• Taste it

• Rinse, Repeat

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Today’s Tasting Method

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But the most important thing about enjoying beer…

• Is to have fun while you drink!

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Beer Style Map

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One last thing…

• Many of these beers are really strong

• Drink plenty of water

• Stop if you feel drunk

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What do you want out of a beer?

• Thirst quencher?– Drink cold Bud/Miller/Coors!– Or ice water, same difference

• Decent beverage with taste and flavor?– Plenty of craft beer options!

• Complex, ponderous, deep, mind-altering experience?– Hells yeah you need craft beer

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHEREBud/Miller/Coors PURE

AWESOMENESSGuinness

Sam Adams

Sierra Nevada

PURE NERDINESS

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LET’S TASTE #1 !

• Anyone know what style it is?

• Win a prize if you guess!

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Style: American Amber Lager

• Brewery: Jack’s Abby• Beer: Lashes Hopbock Lager• ABV: 7.2%• Origin: MA, USA

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American Amber Lager

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Jack’s Abby Brewery

• In Framingham

• They only brew lagers

• Readily available in MA!

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Jack’s Abby

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What’s in a beer?

• Water, Hops, Grain, Yeast• The “grain” is usually malted barley

• …at least, most of the time

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Hops• BITTER BITTER BITTER!• Also a preservative• Big trend now is SUPER INSANE BITTER BEERS

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BET YOU DIDN’T KNOW• Hops are the flower of a vine that is a member

of the marijuana family

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What’s in a Budweiser?

• Water, Yeast, Hops, Malt• aaaaaaand…

• Prize for guessing!

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GENETICALLY-ENGINEERED RICE

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The other things Bud/Miller do to their beers

• FILTER THE HELL OUT OF THEM

• PASTEURIZE THE HELL OUT OF THEM

• …and with it, all the flavors disappear in the name of consistency and blandness

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What other things can craft beers contain?• Sugars• Fruit• Coffee• Chocolate• Spices• Grapes• Honey• Herbs• Pumpkin• Rhubarb• Nuts• Vegetables

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #2!

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Style: Hefeweizen

• Brewery: Weihenstephaner • Beer: Hefe weissbier• ABV: 5.4%• Origin: Germany

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Hefeweizen

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Weihenstephaner

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Lager vs. Ale• What’s the difference?

• Lager is made from lager yeast that ferments at colder temps and doesn't float to the surface

• Ale is made from different yeast that ferments at warmer temps and floats to the top

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Calories

• Which has more?

126145

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Which country is the world’s largest beer market?

• Answer:

• China

• Snow Beer consumption is twice that of Bud Lite!

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #3!

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Style: Saison

• Brewery: Brasserie Dupont• Beer: Saison Dupont• ABV: 6.5%• Origin: Belgium

• “Saison” = “Season”

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Saison

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Saison Dupont

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BET YOU DIDN’T KNOW

• We have Michael Jackson to thank for awesome beer!

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Actually, THIS Michael Jackson

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Michael Jackson’s Books

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The Beer Hunter – TV Series

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The other thing he influenced…

Home Brewing!

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Anyone here brew at home?

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #4!

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Style: India Pale Ale (IPA)

• Brewer: Ithaca Beer Co.• Beer: Flower Power IPA• ABV: 7.5%• Origin: USA

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India Pale Ale (IPA)

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Flower Power

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Aging Beer in a Cellar

• REALLY?

• I can do that?!??

• WTF!!!

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But doesn’t beer go off?

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AMAZINGLY…

• Beer can indeed be aged!• Does it make it better or worse?• Neither! It just changes it.

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What happens to beer in a cellar?

• Hop freshness disappears after a few months

• Flavors become more balanced, dominant flavors mellow out

• Stronger beers become more complex

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What kinds of beer can be aged?

• Don’t bother aging normal lagers– They really don’t change much, except taste less

fresh

• Strong, unfiltered ales are best

• Especially if they have yeast still in the bottle– For “secondary fermentation”

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Yeast in the Bottle

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Quick quiz!

• How old was the oldest beer ever tasted?

• Answer:

• 160 years!

• Allsop’s Arctic Ale

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Check the label

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Storage

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Basements are perfect

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But expect to fill that space

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #5!

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Style: Dubbel

• Brewery: Westmalle (Trappist Monks)• Beer: Dubbel• ABV: 7%• Origin: Belgium

• “Dubbel” = “Double”• Ages well

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Dubbel

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Westmalle Dubbel

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Trappist Monks

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Trappist Beer• Started the “Abbey” style

• Strong, chewy, boozy, complex, flavorful

• Brew to make just enough money to keep the abbeys going

• 6 brewing Trappist abbeys in Belgium, 1 in the Netherlands, 1 in Austria

• There’s also Trappist cheese and marmalade!

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The Trappist Beers

• Achel, Westvleteren, Orval, Rochefort, Chimay, Westmalle, Koningshoeven

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Quiz!

• Where’s the newest Trappist brewery rumored to be opening up?

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Answer:

Massachusetts!

(Spencer, MA)

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #6!

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Style: Tripel

• Brewery: Unibroue• Beer: La Fin Du Monde• ABV: 9%• Origin: Quebec, Canada

• “La Fin Du Monde” = “The End of the World”

• Specially chosen for 12/21!

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Tripel

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

La Fin Du Monde

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BET YOU DIDN’T KNOW• Beer strength used to be written on casks with

“X” for each 3% ABV• X = 3%, XX = 6%, XXX = 9%• So you just drank some of this:

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All About GLASSES!

• Drinking out of a bottle SUCKS– You can’t stick your nose in and smell it like a real

beer geek– You can’t appreciate the true color of the beer– It won’t develop a foamy head– Beers are meant to be poured into glasses!

FAIL

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And plastic just BLOWS

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Types of Beer Glasses

• There are hundreds!

• Craft breweries usually make their own– And some bars refuse to serve a beer if they don’t have the

correct glasses available

• Even the Trappist monks get in on the action

• Some brewers even recommend wine glasses

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Page 88: Beer is so awesome

Look at how FREAKING BEAUTIFUL these glasses are. Just look at them!!

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My go-to glass

Stölzle Lausitz Tulip

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My favorite weird glass

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #7!

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Style: Doppelbock

• Brewery: Ayinger• Beer: Celebrator• ABV: 6.7%• Origin: Germany

• Bock = Billy Goat

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Doppelbock

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

CelebratorDoppelbock

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Quiz time!

• What “skunks” beer?

• Answer:

• LIGHT

• Especially through green glass

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Beer Distribution in the USA

• The USA is still suffering from antiquated and dumb prohibition-era alcohol laws

• You can’t just sell beer to liquor stores if you brew some

• There’s this crappy and stupid 3-tier system…

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3-Tier Distribution System

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Before prohibition…

• Breweries used to own bars• And those bar owners were pressured by the

owners to sell lots and lots of beer• Which increased consumption• Which increased drunkenness• And a backlash started in society• So alcohol was banned with the 18th amendment •

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The Middle-Man• So after prohibition ended, the government wanted to ensure the

serious partayyys wouldn’t happen again

• So they forced beer to be sold first to a distributor, who would then sell to retail outlets in areas of their choosing, hoping it would “temper” the market

• But that just created corrupt middlemen, higher prices and now means that some American beers can’t be sold in certain states. WTF!

• The wine industry found a loophole in 2005 and most states now allow direct-to-consumer wine sales

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The left = happyThe right = sad

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For more info on moronic beer distribution laws…

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #8!

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Style: Scotch Ale

• Brewery: Founders Brewing Co.• Beer: Dirty Bastard• ABV: 8.5%• Origin: MI, USA

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Scotch Ale

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Dirty Bastard

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BET YOU DIDN’T KNOW• Alabama just lifted a ban on beers with the word

“bastard” in their name• There are dozens of them!• And you still can’t legally brew at home in AL

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Beer & Food

• Ever cook with beer?

• What about pairing beer and food?

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Cooking with Beer

• I have no idea.

• This is me:

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Pairing Beer & Food• Simple, just ask Internet:– http://beeradvocate.com/beer/style_pairings

• Here’s a quick and awesome pairing that’s easy to remember:– Roquefort cheese with Rochefort 10 ale

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Beer & Food: Good Books

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #9!

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Style: Barleywine

• Brewery: Weyerbacher• Beer: Blithering Idiot• ABV: 11%• Origin: PA, USA

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Barleywine

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Blithering Idiot

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What’s a Barleywine?

• It’s NOT a wine, durrrr

• It’s just a really strong beer (8-12% ABV)

• And since it’s as strong as some wines, it’s like a “wine made from barley”

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New England and Beer

• New England ROCKS for beer!

• Some of the world’s best craft breweries are here

• Know of any?

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Some of the Seriously Awesome New England Breweries

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The best one in NE?

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Hill Farmstead Brewery• In the middle of absolutely nowhere, VT

• Tiny output of insanely well-made, fresh, truly artisanal ales

• Lines out the door every day they’re open– Cars from everywhere but VT

• Their beers really are that good

• Not sold anywhere but the brewery

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A very close runner-up

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The Alchemist

• Next door to Ben & Jerry’s, Waterbury VT

• Was a brewpub until flooded by Irene in 2011

• Has since become a brewery and focuses on making one beer – Heady Topper – incredibly well

• Heady Topper now one of the world’s most sought-after beers

• It’s also not sold outside of VT

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Great book!

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #10!

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Style: Sweet Stout

• Brewery: Left Hand• Beer: Milk Stout Nitro• ABV: 6%• Origin: CO, USA

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Sweet Stout

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Milk Stout Nitro

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Milk in Stout?

• It’s not actually milk that’s in it

• It’s actually lactose, a sugar derived from milk

• Lactose is unfermentable by beer yeast, so it adds sweetness and body to the beer

• And now we all know who in the room is lactose intolerant

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Beer Trading• Many great beers will never appear on local

shelves

• So you trade online!

• No money, just beer-for-beer trade

• You just hope the other person sends you the box they promised– And that they pack it well enough!

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Whales

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Whales? WTF!

• Whales are beers that are both

– SUPER RARE

and

– SUPER AWESOME

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #11!

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Style: Imperial Stout

• Brewery: Stone• Beer: Imperial Russian Stout• ABV: 10.5%• Origin: CA, USA

• 2010 vintage,Aged for 2 years+

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Imperial Stout

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

2010 Stone ImperialRussian Stout

Stone ImperialRussian Stout

(when it’s releasedeach May)

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Imperial Stout

• Legend has it that Russia’s Catherine the Great loved these strong stouts from England

• And the high ABV meant it would survive OK in the arctic frozen tundra

• So it’s now usually called Russian Imperial Stout

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Quiz time!

• Which country has the highest per capita beer consumption?

• Answer:

• Czech Republic

• Followed by Germany, Austria, Ireland• USA is #12

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Get ready for a big taste change!

• We’re going….• SOUR!

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #12!

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Style: Flanders Red (Sour)

• Brewery: Bockor• Beer: Cuvee Des Jacobins Rouge• ABV: 5.5%• Origin: Belgium

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Flanders Red Ale

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Cuvee desJacobins Rouge

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AT THIS POINT OF THE TASTING

THE PRESENTATION COULD REALLY START TO SUCK

AND YOU WOULD STILL THINK IT’S AWESOME

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Now for my favorite style of beer in the whole freakin’ world

LAMBIC

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Lambic

• A sour, tart and incredibly complex ale

• Difficult to brew

• You know that yeast stuff that is used to ferment beer? It has to blow in from the SURROUNDING AIR

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The Coolship

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Blending Lambic to make Gueuze

• Pure lambic will scrape your face off with sourness

• It is blended to make “gueuze”, which is refreshing, thirst-quenching and generally mind-blowing

• Oude Gueuze is a blend of 1, 2 and 3-year old lambic

• It has a really distinctive funky “horse blanket” aroma

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Cantillon

• THE• GREATEST

• BREWERY• IN

•THE

•WORLD

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Page 151: Beer is so awesome

Ceremony

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Cantillon is a WHALE

• I carried 9 bottles back from Europe– Wished I had space for more

• Some beers fly off shelves, Cantillon basically doesn’t even appear on USA shelves

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LET’S TASTE STYLE #13!

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Style: Gueuze (Lambic)

• Brewery: Lindemans• Beer: Gueuze Cuvée René• ABV: 5%• Origin: Belgium

• Ages well

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Gueuze

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Lindemans GueuzeCuvee Rene

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Westy

• Westvleteren 12, to be exact

• It’s a Trappist ale, the strongest of three types the abbey makes

• But it’s not distributed or sold beyond the abbey in Belgium

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And…

• It happens to be the top-rated beer in the world!

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How do you get it?• Simple!

• Fly to Belgium

• Drive to West Flanders

• Phone the brewery, pray you get through

• Give them your car license plate #

• Hope the same car didn’t buy beer there in the last 60 days

• Then drive there in the same car to pick up 1 case of whichever type of beer they’re offering that day

• Pray they’re offering the “12” beer style

• Buy it, drink it!

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Why the crazy controls?

• Because Trappist monks are against commercialism and only brew enough to keep their monastery going

• And then…

• Their monastery needed a BIG renovation

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So just once, it CAME TO THE USA!

http://www.denverpost.com/breakingnews/ci_22188986/beer-snobs-wait-colorado-springs-worlds-best-trappist

Only $85 for a 6-pack!

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And it sold out in hours!

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LET’S TASTE OUR LAST BEER STYLE, #14!

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Style: Quadrupel

• Brewery: Abbey of St. Sixtus• Beer: Westvleteren 12• ABV: 10.2%• Origin: Belgium

• Who loves ya?

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Quadrupel

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The Graph

Availability

QualityAWESOMECRAP

RARE

EVERYWHERE

Westvleteren 12

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All the styles from today

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Final Note:

The Real Best Beer In The World

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The best beer is to be found where you enjoy yourself the most, and

where you create the best memories.

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For more info…

• beeradvocate.com

• ratebeer.com

• Say the word “beer” near me and listen for an hour or two as I talk uncontrollably

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THANK YOU!