Banish Your Inner Critic (excerpt) Table of …denisejacobs.com/innercritic/files/2017/03/excerpt...Banish Your Inner Critic (excerpt) Table of ContentsDenise Jacobs Banish Your Inner

BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) TableofContentsDeniseJacobs

BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) TableofContentsDeniseJacobs

Introduction 3AreYouDoingYourBestWork?...................................................................................................................3TriumphingOverMyOwnInnerCritic......................................................................................................4It’sTimeforYoutoTriumphToo.................................................................................................................7

Why Banish the Inner Critic? 9OurIntrinsicCreativity.....................................................................................................................................9YourBrainonCreativity..........................................................................................................................11Creativity,Interrupted.............................................................................................................................12

MeettheInnerCritic.......................................................................................................................................13Creativityvs.TheInnerCritic.....................................................................................................................14ReclaimingCreativity......................................................................................................................................15

BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Introduction

Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 3

Introduction

Are You Doing Your Best Work? You’refeelingthepressuretoperform:you’reonatightdeadline,andthereisalotridingonyourabilitytocomeupwithsomethinggreat. But,tryasyoumight…nothing.Youcan’tthink,youcan’tproblem-solve.You’reuninspired.Generatingneworinterestingideas?Youwish!Why?

Becauseyou

• shootdownyourideasbeforetheyevenhaveachance

• callyourselfafailurebecauseothersaroundyouaresucceeding

• discountyourideasbecausetheyaren’t100percentoriginal

• tellyourselfthatyou’rejustnotcreativeatall • haveahardtimevaluingwhatyoucreate

• can’timaginecreatingwithoutanguishandeffort,soyoumakeittrue…

Unsurprisingly,you,myfriend,arecompletelycreativelyblocked.

Andthen,whenyoutuneintoyourinternalself-talk,youfindasteadytorrentofself-chastisement,internalinsults,andput-downs:

• “Whycan’tyoucomeupwithanything?!”

• “Wow–soyou’vegotamaster’sinmarketingandthisisallyou’vegot?!”

• “You’reanidiot!Think,forchrissakes!”Yikes!

Yourcreativeparalysisisallthemorefrustratingbecauseyou’vebeenontheotherside.You’vehadmomentswhenyoudancedattheintersectionofyourskills,interests,naturalabilities,andaptitudes.Youwereexcited,completelyengaged,andseemedtobeanendlessfountofideasandsolutions.Youfeltcompletelyknowledgeable,powerful,andcompetent.Whateveritwasthatyouweredoing,youtotallynailedit.Theexperiencewasfantastic.

Formanyofus,creatingisatorturedprocess.Thetorture,however,isnotinherentincreatingitself,butinsteadcomesfromthefearswehavearoundourabilitytocreate.TheconstellationofourfearsmanifestsastheInnerCritic.Thispsychologicalconstructcantrickusintobelievingtheveryworstaboutourselves



andourabilitytocreateordoanythingelseofvalueintheworld.Itblockstheamazingideaswehaveinsidefromcomingout.TheInnerCritickeepsusfromaccessingandexpressingtheverythingwedesire:theflowofourcreativity.

Basedonseveralyearsofresearchonthecreativeprocess,articleswrittenandpresentationsdevelopedanddeliveredaroundtheworld,surveyfeedback,coachingclients,andmostimportantly,talkingwithconferenceandworkshopattendeesandothercreativesofallsortsinmultipleindustries,IknowthattheInnerCriticisthelargestblocktocreativitythatexists.

Tocreate,weneedtoacknowledgetheInnerCriticandthedamageitdoestoourworklife,personallife,andgeneralwell-being. Tocreatelastingchange,however,wereallyneedtolearnhowtobreakitspoweroverussowecanregainourcapacitytocreate. IwrotethisbookbecauseIwantyoutobeabletoworkbetter,producemore,andcreatewithahigherlevelofexcellencethanyoualreadydo.ByidentifyinganddisempoweringthevariousformsoftheInnerCriticthatplagueus,wecanremovethebarricadesstandingbetweenusandourfullcreativeexpression.Thisbookwillhelpyoudojustthat.

However,IalsowrotethisbookbecauseIfeelyourpain.Iknowthetopographyofself-criticismpersonally:IhavestruggledwithaparticularlymeanandrelentlessInnerCriticthathasmadememiserableatformostofmylife.BecauseofmyownInnerCritic,Ihavetraveledfarandwideinthelandsofself-judgmentandself-doubt,dismissingthecreativitythatIdidhave,believingthatmyworkwasn’tgoodenough,andbeingsofocusedonwhatothersweredoingthatIcouldn’tseemyownstrengthsorprogress.

ImaginebeingabletocreatewithouttheinternalmentalfrictionoftheInnerCritic.Doesn’tthatsoundwonderful?It’snotjustapipedream–itcanbedone.IknowbecauseI’veexperienceditmyself.

Yousee,notonlydoIwritethisbookfromthestandpointofsomeonewhowasunsurethatshewastrulycreative;IalsowriteitfromthestandpointofsomeonewhohasfinallysilencedherInnerCritic,whoembracesandownshercreativity,andwhonowfeelsunstoppable.

Triumphing Over My Own Inner Critic Therearethosewho,byeithergoodfortuneorhardwork,arenotafflictedbyself-doubtanddon’tseemtohavemuchofanInnerCriticatall.Andthentherearetherestofus:wewhostruggledailytomaintainamodicumofself-assuranceaswegothroughourworkandpersonallivesbecauseofthebarrageofself-criticalinnerdialoguethatisourconstantcompanion.



Iusedtobeinthislattergroup–untilIhadanexperiencethatchangedmylife.Letmetellyouwhathappened. WhenIwrotemyfirstbook,TheCSSDetectiveGuide,theexperiencedidnotstartoutallsunshineandSantaClaus.Ilandedabookcontractfromaserendipitousmeetingatatechconferenceparty,andIwasthrilledtobeontracktoachievingmytwobiglifegoals:

1) Becominganauthor,and2) Usingmyexpertstatustobecomeaspeaker.

Therewasonlyoneproblem:Iwasterrified.

Thefirsttwodaysofmyunrealisticallyaggressiveschedule(fourandahalfmonthstowritea250-pagetechbook)foundmesobbingonmycouch.Andletmebeclearaboutthis:Iwasn’tsnifflingquietlyanddabbingatmyeyeswithatissue.Ohno.Iblubberedwhilesittingonthesideofmycouch,asmytearsflowedontotheplushsagegreenfabricofthepillowIclutchedtomychest.Myfearsofnotknowingenough,lookingstupid,beingjudged,beingafakeandafraud,andnotbeinggoodenoughallplaguedmetothepointofnear-paralysis.Finally,onthethirddayIbuckedup,putonmybig-girlpants,andfinallysatdowntotheveryhardworkof…researching.Youknow,theincrediblyadvancedandrigoroustaskoflookinguparticlesontheweb,readingthem,andthenearmarkingrelevantinformationtoputinmybook.Yes,it’strue:IhadworkedmyselfupintoanemotionalfrothoversomethingthatIcouldpracticallydoinmysleep.Asafriendofminewouldsay:Crazypants!

Duringthenexteightmonthsofwritingmybook(becausedoingitinfourandahalfmonthswascompletelyuntenable),Icameupagainstthatinnercriticalvoicethattriedtoblockmyideasandcreativelyparalyzemealmostdaily.Thisvoicetoldmeeverydaythat

• myideaswerestupid

• eventhoughIhadtaughtthissubjectforfiveyearsatacollegelevel,thatIwasn’tenoughofanexpertonit

• mywebdesignswereamateurandsimplistic

• peoplewouldjudgemenegativelyandcriticizemybookfornotbeingin-depth,complete,oradvancedenough

That’sright:everyday. ThewayIoftendescribetheexperienceisthatinsteadofexercisingcreativity,Ipracticeditseviltwin:destructivity.Witheveryfearfulthoughtofnotbeingexpertenough,notknowingenough,wonderingifmywritingwasanygood,anddoubtingmyabilitytodesignwebsites,Itoremyselfdown.Totrytobuildmyselfup,eachdayIhadtofocusonwhatwasdirectlyinfrontofmeanddomybesttoignoremyanxietiesaboutmyperceiveddeficiencies.Buttheywerestillthere.



Sometimeinthefourthmonthofwriting,I’dhadenough.Ineededtofigureouthowtoturnoff(oratleastmanage)thisunendingparadeofself-criticalthoughts.Ididalittlebitofresearchonself-criticismandfoundoutaboutthisthingcalledtheInnerCritic.AlthoughIdidn’tknowit,somethingclickedinsideofme,becauseafewdayslater,anideaforapresentationcametomeintheshower.Stilldrippingwetandwrappedinatowel,Igrabbedpencilandpapertojotdownfourpagesofnotes.Afewweekslater,Iwasawakenedat5a.m.byanideaforacreativity-bustingworkshop.Somethingbigwasbrewinginmysubconscious.

However,whileIwasdesigningthewebsiteforTheCSSDetectiveGuide,Ihadatrulymagicalexperiencethatchangedeverything. Tohavemybook’swebsiteupbeforeIspokeonapanelatthemajortechconferenceSouthBySouthwest(SXSW)Interactiveattheendoftheweek,IsatdowntocreatemywebsitemockupinPhotoshopfromasketchsoIcouldcodeitmoreeasily.Muchtomysurprise,myquicksit-downconsumedme,somuchsothatIwasanhourandahalflategoingtoafriend’shousefordinner.Throughthewholeevening,Ilongedtoreturntomydesigning,sowhenIgothomeat12:30a.m.,Ithought“I’lljustdoalittlebitandthengotobed.”1a.m.,then2a.m.,andthen3a.m.rolledby,andIjustcouldn’tstop.Withmyfavoritejazzplayinginthebackground,IwasinthehighofcreativeflowasIexperimentedwithcolor,typography,andlayout.Itwassheerbliss.Finally,at5:30a.m.,stillfiredupaboutdesigning,IstoppedbecauseIknewthatifIdidn’t,Iwouldsurelygetamigrainethenextday.Buzzingfromthecreativejuicescoursingthroughme,Ididmybesttogotosleep. Wakingupagainameretwohourslater,Iwaseagertogetbacktomycreation.Mywholebodyeffervescedwithenergy.Infact,Iwasbeyondblissful:Iwaseuphoric.Ifeltacontinuousrushofexcitementandpowersimilartothatofbeinginlove.IfeltlikeIcoulddoanythingIputmymindto.Ifeltliketheultimateversionofmyself:Ifeltthefullpowerofmycreativepotential. OnlyinretrospectdidIunderstandwhythiswassuchanincrediblypowerfulpeakexperience:itwasthefirsttimeinsolong(maybeever?)thatIhadexperiencedcreatingwithnointernalself-criticalcommentary:Nothoughtsof,“Isthisanygood?”orquestioningmyabilities.Nocomparingmydesigntothoseofotherpeople.Noworryingaboutwhatotherpeoplewouldthinkorsayaboutit.Forthefirsttimeineightmonths,Iexperiencedcriticism-freecreating.

ThatdayImadetwomonumentalrealizations:

First,thattheabsenceofmyInnerCriticallowedmycreativitytoflow!Becauseitwasquiet,therewasspaceformycreativityandideastocomeouttoplay.

Second,thatcreativityispower,andit’sasourceofpowerthateachandeveryoneofushas.

Unfortunately,mostofusrarelytapintoourcreativepower.Why?ForthesamereasonIsatonmycouchandcriedfortwodaysinsteadofstartingtowritemybook.



Becauseofthelitanyofself-criticalthoughtsandtheself-doubtthattheygenerate.BecauseoftheInnerCritic. Immediatelyfollowingthoserealizations,Ihadanevendeeperepiphany:helpingotherpeoplereachthefeelingofbeingenergizedandcompletelyalivebyallowingtheircreativitytoflowwaswhatIwantedtodowithmylife.Why?Becausewhenweremovetheblocks,wecanaccessthissourceofpersonalpower.Andwhenwelearntoremovetheblockstomoreregularlyaccessandchannelourcreativepower,wecantransformourlivesandthelivesofothers–andchangetheworldforthebetter.

Ibecameobsessed:Ithrewmyselfintolearningaboutthecreativeprocess,specificallyhowtoremovecreativeblocks.NomatterwhichapproachIstudied,whetheritwasbasedonpsychology,neuroscience,productivity,orpracticality,theyallledbacktothesameplace:theInnerCritic.

Completingmyfirstbookdidindeedbecomethespringboardforbecomingaspeakerinthetechindustry.OnceIhadestablishedagoodreputationformyself,Ishiftedtospeakingaboutthecreativeprocess,removingcreativeblocks,andsilencingtheInnerCritic.AsIsuspected,thecontentresonateddeeplywithaudiences.WhenItookmypresentationcontentastepfurtherbywritinganarticlecalled“BanishingYourInnerCritic,”theresponsewasphenomenal.Hundredsofpeoplepostedandsharedthearticleonsocialmediaforseveraldays.Itevengotcelebrityattention:onGoogle+,actressFeliciaDaysharedthearticleandvouchedforthetechniquesthatIshared.AlloftheresponsesvalidatedwhatIhadsuspectedwhentheideaforthecreativitytalkfirstcametometheshower:theInnerCriticisaproblemthateveryonehasandthateveryoneneedshelpwith.

Duringthenextfewyears,throughthefeedbackfrommoretalks,keynotes,workshops,severalmorearticles,coachingclients,andheartfeltemailsfromattendeesandreadersdescribinghowmuchtheinformationspoketothemandalteredtheirlives,Iknewitwastimeformetoreachanevenwideraudience.IknewthenthatIhadtotakemycontenttothenextlevelandmakeitmoreaccessibletoevenmorepeople.Theindicationswereclear:itwastimeformewriteahandbookonhowtoBanishtheInnerCritic.Throughthisbook,Icouldhelppeoplereclaimtheircreativepowerandstartachievingmoresuccessbysilencingtheirownvoiceofself-doubt.

It’s Time for You to Triumph Too You’vefeltlostandinastupor,wanderingyourownwastelandsofself-criticism.Fortunately,youareaboutto(re)discoveryourCreativeSelfandyourCreativePower,andbreakyourselfoutofyourInnerCritic-inducedtrance. Inthisbook,youwill

• learntheoriginsoftheInnerCritic



• discovertheonebrainfunctionandthreeskillsthatyoualreadypossesstovanquishyourInnerCritic

• learnmultiplemethodstodealwiththefearofbeingnegativelyevaluatedbyothers

• discoverhowtotransformhighlycriticalself-talkintothatofapprovalandencouragement

• workonbolsteringyoursenseofselftofeelthatyouandyourideasaregoodenough

• acknowledge,unblock,andenhanceyourcreativity

• channelyournowflowingcreativityasaforceforpositivechangeintheworld

You,myfriend,areapathfinder,andthisbookisamanualtoguideyoualongthepathofsilencingyourInnerCritic.Throughthepagesofthisbook,I’llbeyourmentor,providingyouwithnecessaryinformationtochangeyourthinkinghabits,andyourcoach,cheeringyouonasyoureleaseyourinnercriticalthoughtsandreplacethemwiththoughtsthatsupportyourcreativityandmotivateyoutodoyourbestwork.Throughthisprocess,I’vetotallygotyourback.

Butthebestpartisthatthroughusingthetoolscontainedinthesechapters,insteadofbeingyourownworstcreativeenemy,you’llhaveyourownbacktoo.Bytheendofthisprocess,you’llonlyvalueandrespectyourcreativitymore,butyou’llalsoenduplikingandappreciatingyourselfmoreonthewhole.Furthermore,you’llfindyourselffreefromtheweightofworryingaboutwhatothersthink,andyou’llbeabletobreakawayfromtherestrictionsofshoulds,musts,andoughts.You’llescapethetrapofcomparingyourselftoothers,andyou’lldropthebeliefthatyoudon’tknowenoughorthatyouneedtofigureeverythingoutbyyourself.

AreyoureadytostartlookingatthewaysyourInnerCriticshowsup,discoveringhowtofaceyourfears,bringingmistakenbeliefstothesurfaceofyourawareness,andmovingbeyondthemtoreachyourownuniqueformofempoweredcreativityontheotherside?

Readon,becauseweareabouttoembarkonajourneytoquietthatinsidiousInnerCriticsoyoucanunleashyourcreativity,letyourtruetalentsshine,andstartdoingyourbestwork–andultimately,liveyourbestlifebychannelingyourcreativepowerforgood.

Let’stakethefirststeptoawholenewworldrightnow–together.

BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Chapter1:WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?


1 Why Banish the Inner Critic? This chapter examines:

Creativity and Creative Flow

Inner Critic Origins

Creativity v. the Inner Critic

The Need to Reclaim Creativity

A Call to Action

“Whatisthisselfinsideus,thissilentobserver,

Severeandspeechlesscritic,whocanterroriseus

Andurgeusontofutileactivity,

Andintheend,judgeusstillmoreseverely

Fortheerrorsintowhichhisownreproachesdroveus?”

—T.S.Eliot,TheElderStatesman

Our Intrinsic Creativity Theideafirstcomestoyouunbidden.Aglimmerontheedgeofyourperception,it’shazy,notfullyformed,itsedgesfuzzyandindistinct.“Wheredidthatcomefrom?”youwonderbriefly.Butonceyouputyourfullattentionontheidea,thelongeryoufocus,themoreclearanddistinctitbecomes.Youbegintofeelawellingwithin:apushfromyourgutandaquickeningofyourheart. Youhavetocaptureit,thisidea.Yougrabapieceofpaperandjotdownnotesordoaquicksketch.Ormaybeyourecordaquickvoicememoonyourphone.Butthe



ideawon’tleaveyoualone,andreturnstoyouwithincreasedinsistenceandclarity.Yourbrainstartstoexplodewithrelatedideasasyoustarttoconnectthedots.Yourimaginationtakesover,visualizinghowtoexecutethisconceptthathasstolenyourattention. Nothing–nomentalbarrierofself-doubtorquestioning–comesbetweenyouandyourcreativework.Nothinginyousays“no”or“Idon’tknow.”Instead,everythinginyousays“yes”asyoubegintheprocessofmakingyourideamanifest.Andthemorethedetailsfallintoplacelikepuzzlepiecescomingtogether,themore“yes”youfeel.Arushofenergyflowsthroughyou,compellingandmotivatingyoutoprioritizeyourbrainchild.Interest,curiosity,andfascinationtakeover. Hoursflybyasyouareengrossedinyourproject.Inthemidstofmaking,youfeelclear,super-focused,andconfident.Onceyou’vefinallyacteduponyouridea,youfeelasenseofcompletionandsatisfaction.

Whileitisnotthesameforeverysinglecreativeendeavor,thisistheessenceoftheexperience.Mostpeoplecomingoutofthethroesofcreatingwilltellyou,faceaglowandeyesstillshining,thattheexperience,onthewhole,wasamazing.Regardlessofwhetheryouweredesigninganinterfaceforanapp,gettingdownideasforyourstartup,writingablogpost,developingsoftware,cookingasix-coursegourmetdinner,orchoreographingaperformance–theprocessgoingoninyourheadandthesensationsyouwerehavingwereuniversal. Infact,inmykeynotesandworkshops,oneofmyfavoritepiecesofaudienceparticipationiswhenIasktheattendeesaboutwhatcreativeflowfeelslikeforthem.Theresponses–regardlessoftheaudiencelocationordemographics–areremarkablysimilar.Herearethewordsthatcomeuptimeandtimeagain:

Timeless・Connected・Happy・Good・Strong・Clear・Focused・ Confident・Alive・Vibrant・Energized・Everythingflows・Euphoric・

Trance-like・Enjoyable・Empowered・Capable

Whenwearecreative,weareblissfully“inthezone,”engagedinsoul-satisfyingmakingandproducing.InhisbookCreativity,MihalyCsikszentmihalyi,thepioneeringresearcherwhofirstidentifiedthestateofflow,says,“whenweareinvolvedincreativity,wefeelthatwearelivingmorefullythanduringtherestoflife.”Yes!Creativitymakesusfeelfullyalive. Beforeyoufallbackonanylimitedideasaroundwhatcreativityis,allowmetodispelafewmyths.Youdon’thavetobeavisualartist,writer,ormusiciantobecreative.Youdon’thavetobeeccentric,neurotic,tortured,orstarving.Creativityisn’tsolelythedomainofagroupof“special”peoplewhomyou’llneverbeapartof. Weareborncreative.Creativityisaboutseeingpossibilities.It’saspark,astirring,animpetus:apowerfulforcethatcompelsustocreateandbringanideatolife.



Thispowerisineverybody.Weallhavethedesiretocreatesomethingoutofnothing,beitarecipe,apoem,orabusiness.Creativityisn’twhatyouproduceorthemediumyouusetoproduceit. What’smore,weeachhaveourownuniqueformofcreativity,sodon’tbefooledintobelievingthatjustbecausewhatyouaregreatatcreatingisn’t“art”thatit’snotvalid.Infact,ifyouareanengineer,scientist,oranyoneelseofananalyticbent,andyoubelieveyourselftobeinthecategoryof“peoplewhoaren’tcreative,”you’rewrong.Instead,youareoneofthemostcreativeandimaginativekindsofpeopleontheplanet. I’mheretotellyouthatyouarecreative.Yes,YOU. CreativityistheessenceofourbeingandapartofourDNA.Indeed,neuroscienceshowsthatweareliterallywiredforit.

Your Brain on Creativity Everyonehasthecapacitytoexperiencethe“optimalstateofconsciousnesswherewebothfeelandperformourbest.”1Oneofthegreatparadoxesofcreativeflow,however,isthatyoucan’tforceit;youcanonlycreatetheproperenvironmentforaccessingit.Theconditionsneededtogetintoaflowstateareaconfluenceofuninterruptedtimetoconcentrate,cleargoals,thecorrectratioofchallengetoskill,andimmediatefeedbackfromouractions.2Thenthemagichappens. Oncewegetintoflow,timeperceptionbecomesaltered.Hoursseemlikeminutes,and/orminutesseemlikehours.Wefeelaeuphoricsenseofcontrolandpersonalpower,butparadoxicallyloseoursenseofself.Performanceofallkindsisheightenedtremendously–creativeperformanceinparticular.Butitgetsevenbetter:theeffectsofflowgobeyondtheimmediatemoment.HarvardresearcherTeresaAmabilediscoveredthatpeoplecontinuetofeelcreativethedayafter.3Icallthis“theflowafterglow.”Asweincreasinglyachievecreativeflow,wetrainourbrainstobeevenmorecreative. Thegoodnewsisthatifyoudon’tthinkofyourselfascreativeortrustyourcreativity,youcannowrelax.Beingcreativeisbuiltintothewayourbrainsaredesignedtowork.Onacellularlevelduringtheflowstate,serotoninanddopamine,whicharethepleasure-inducingbrainchemicalsorneurotransmitters,washoverourbrains.Anotherneurotransmitter,endorphin,improvesfocus–helpingtoshutoutdistractions.Thisincreasesourabilitytomakenewmentalconnections,furtherenhancingperformance.Anandamide,aneurotransmitterwhosenameisderivedfromtheSanskritwordforbliss,entersthescene.Inadditiontoencouragingthebraintopracticelateralthinking4andtoreleaseevenmoredopamine,anandamidehelpsgeneratepleasureandmotivation Speakingofthebrain,creativitydoesnothappenbecausethe“imaginative”rightbraintakesoverthe“analytical”leftbrain.Infact,scientistsconsidertheconceptofcreativitybeingseatedintherightsideofthebrainasarchaic.5



Themostexcitingfindingaboutcreativityinthebrainisthis:researchersnowconsidercreativitytobebasedinthepartofthebrainresponsibleforplanning,self-evaluation,andself-censorship.6Thedorsolateralprefrontalcortexiswherethemajorityofhighercognitivefunctionsofworkingmemory,mentalimagery,andwilledaction(specificallyself-monitoringandimpulsecontrol)lives.Inotherwords,thisisthepartofthebrainthatinterpretssituations,envisionsconsequences,andthenadaptsbehavioraccordingly.Contrarytowhatyoumightthink,thegoalisnotforthisareatobeactive.Rather,creativemagichappenswhenthedorsolateralprefrontalcortexpowersdownandstaysquiet.Simplyput,creativitycomesfromrelaxingself-evaluationandself-judgment–andtheself-criticismandself-doubtthatresultfromthem. Thereinliestherub.

Creativity, Interrupted Childrenareterrificexamplesofunfetteredcreativity;theyeffortlesslycreateworldswiththeirimagination.Asachild,youdidthistoo.Whenwewereyounger,wetrustedthecreativesparkthatliveswithinus,andweeasilyplayedwithideasandletthemoutintotheworld.Imaginationwasourbooncompanion,andcreativity,ourbestfriend. Overtime,ouroncecloserelationshipwithourcreativitybecomesstrained.Insteadofexercisingourabilitytobringforthsomethingnewandpositiveintotheworld,webegintopracticecreativity’seviltwin,destructivity:usingourimaginationinwaysthatsabotageourcreativeefforts.Why?Becauseanewplayercropsup,wedgingitselfbetweenusandouroncebestbuddyofcreativity.Posingasaswornprotector,thisinterloperbeginstowhisperdoubtsinourearaftereveryletdown,everyunexpectedcriticism,andeveryperceivedfailure. Whereweusedtotrustintheflowofinspirationandideasfromourcreativity,wenowbegintosecond-guessthesemessagesthroughthefilterofthisnewinterpreter.Westarttofallpreytotheincessantinternalcriticalvoicethattellsusthatwedon’tknowenough,thatwemightlookstupidandbecriticized,thatourideasaren’toriginal,thatwearen’tworkinghardenough–andthatwehavetodo,be,andproducemoreinordertobeaccepted.Wefallvictimtoouranxietythatwe’llbefoundoutasafraud,thatourworkhastobeexecutedperfectlytoberecognizedandvalued,thatwewillfailatthechallengeswetakeon,orthatwecan’tkeepupwiththeskillsandtechnologiesthatweneedforourwork.It’snowonderwecrackundertheweightofthebeliefthatwearen’tenough. Whathappenedtotheunselfconsciousstateofflowingcreativitythatweusedtoentersoeasily?Whathappenedtothelife-in-technicolorexperiencesthatleftuswithasenseofwonderatwhatweproducedandexcitementatdoingmoreinthefuture?



Myfriend,yourenjoyablecreativeprocessandaccesstoyourcreativepowerhavebeenusurpedbyinternalcriticalthoughtsrootedinoldfearsandmistakenbeliefs.MayIintroducetoyou:theInnerCritic.

Meet the Inner Critic Whileweareborncreative,wearenotbornself-critical.Strongself-reflectionisnecessarytohelpachildevaluateherorhisbehaviorinordertomakegoodchoices.However,self-judgmentandself-criticismreplacesself-reflection,anditthengrowsuncheckedduringadolescence,throughadulthood,andtotheendsofourlivesintoaforcethatblocksusfromreachingourcreativepotential.Excessiveself-criticismcanbecomethepredominantinfluenceinourlives,erectingobstructionstoopportunitiesandholdingusbackfromsteppingintoourcreativegreatness.Whatisthisparticularformofuncheckedself-criticism?ThispsychologicalconstructisknownastheInnerCritic. Bornfromexperiencesinternalizedearlyinlife,theInnerCriticisanamalgamationofeverycriticalthingwe’veeverheard(orthoughtweheard)frompeopleofinfluence.Intheirattemptstopushustoconformtothenormsofsociety,parents,olderfamilymembersorcaretakers,teachers,coaches,siblings,peers,andfriendsareafountofcriticism-filledmessages.Inourimpressionablestate,weinternalizethesecriticisms.Wemodelthem,viewingourselvesfromaplaceofcriticismandjudgment.Wemayevenunconsciouslyemulatethenegativebeliefsthatthepeopleclosesttousholdaboutthemselves. Thus,messagesfromourchildhoodlike,“youwillneverbesuccessful”or“yourideasarenogood”embedthemselvesintoourpsyches.Aswegetolder,thesecriticismsandjudgmentsbecomesodeeplyingrainedthatwenolongercanrecognizethemasmessagesthatoriginatedfromoutsideofourownminds.Wethenbelievethesecriticalmessagestobeourowntruths,formingthewarpandweftofthefabricofhowwerelatetoourselves. AlthoughtheInnerCriticisalsoknownastheinnercriticalvoice7,youmaynotdetectitspresencebyactuallyhearingavoice.TheInnerCriticcanbesneaky,workingtoavoiddetectionbytryingtoappearasyournativethoughts.Sofamiliarastobeinvisible,yourInnerCriticreflexmaybesoautomaticthatyoumaynotevenregisterthethoughts.Ifyoudonotdetectitspresence,you’llmostlikelyrecognizetheInnerCriticthroughthehabitualnegativeself-talkthatdirectlyinfluencesyourbehavior. WhatdrivestheInnerCritic?Thedesiretoprotectourselves. OuremotionalmindsdevelopedtheInnerCriticasaprotectionstrategyagainstsituationsinwhichwecouldbejudged,rejected,orcriticized.Initsdeterminationtokeepthesepotentialfuturethreatsatbay,theInnerCriticdefendsourwell-beingandsocialsafetythemomentwehaveasenseoflosingeither.IthinkoftheInnerCriticasaproactivementalthreat-to-selfsystem.



Butallofthisstilldoesn’tanswerthequestionofwhat’sthetruesourceoftheInnerCritic.Whatdoourinnercriticalthoughtshaveincommonattheircore?Oneword:Fear. Ifyou’refeelinganxious,guilty,orashamedaroundyourcreativity,it’slikelyaresultoftheInnerCritic’shandiwork.Whenwearedeepinthewoodsofourinnercriticalthoughts,inessence,weareexperiencingfear.Havingthesefeelingsdisruptsrelaxedandorderedthinking,andinitsplace,weexperiencewhatCsikszentmihalyicalls“disorderedattention.”Inthisstate,weturnourattentioninwardandfocusonthenegative,destroyingourabilitytopursuepositiveexternalgoalsorevenaccomplishthetaskathand.Themoreweareinthisstateofmind,themoreourcapacityforenjoymentplummetsasitbecomemoredifficulttolearnanythingnew.Instead,werehasholdinformation,wanderingtheforestofourfearswithnomeanstoproblem-solveourwayoutofit.

Creativity vs. The Inner Critic Earlier,welearnedthattheprefrontalcortex,thepartofthebrainthatjudges,criticizes,andrulesself-inhibition,fallssilentwhenwegointocreativeflow.ThisistheseatoftheInnerCritic.ResearchshowsthatnotonlydoesaquietInnerCriticfacilitatecreativeflow,butcreativeflowconverselykeepstheInnerCriticquiet.CreativityandtheInnerCritic,then,areinextricablyconnected.Buttheyarebinary:theycannotcoexist.IfyourInnerCriticisincontrol,thenaccessingyourcreativitywillbeelusiveatbestandimpossibleatworst. Yes,you’vehadsuccesswithcreativeprojects,andyes,youmayhavebeenfairlysatisfiedwithwhatyouproducedafterthefact.However,ifyouhadanoverlyactiveInnerCriticduringtheprocess,thefactthatthatyouwereabletoproducewasdespiteitsoverbearingpresenceratherthanbecauseofitsallegedlybeneficialinput.Insteadoffeelingprotected,youhadtoslogthroughaquagmireofanxiety.Isthisreallyhowyouwanttocreate? Anyself-judgment,self-criticism,ordoubtsaboutyourabilitieswillobliteratecreativeflow,rippingyoufromyourcreativehightocastyoubackonthegroundwhileyougrapplewithyourfears.Yourprefrontalcortex,whichwaspreviouslyfavorablyinactive,firesbackupwithalitanyofallegedlyrationalreasonstogointoself-protectionmode.Allwhilethistranspires,thedoortoyourcreativepowerslamsshutandyoucannotfullyrealizeyourvision.TheInnerCriticistheenemyofcreativity,productivity,andsanity. Incontrast,whenweareincreativeflow,wefeelthefullpotentialofourpersonalcreativepower,anenhancedandstrengthenedsenseofself.Peoplewhoexperiencecreativeflowregularlyreportfeelingfocusedandcreative,engagedandmotivated,activeandconnected,andstrongandincontrol.Thisplaceofempowermentisourtruecreativehome.



Feelingfullycreativelikethisiswhatwewantandneed.Butsomanyofuscutourselvesofffromthispower,byjudgingideasbeforetheyhaveachancetodevelop,attemptingtoattainunreachablestandards,creatingbarriersforourselves,keepingourimaginationsunderwraps,ordenyingthatwearecreativeatall.Butwecandobetter.Wecandomorewiththispowerfulforce. Ifyouthinkofcreatingasanunpleasantandagonizingprocess–thenyou’renotthinkingaboutactualcreating.Instead,you’rerecallingthesensationoftheInnerCritictriggeringyourfearsandsupplantingtheprocess.It’stheInnerCriticthatmakescreatingpainful.Yourcriticalthoughtsarethemainblockadetoyourcreativity.Theythwartthefluidprocessofideasmovingfromyourinternalsubconsciousuniversetoyourconsciousmindtoaccessandmaketangible. Insuccumbingtothevoiceofdoubt,werelinquishourcreativepowertotheInnerCritic.AccordingtoCsikszentmihalyi,thestruggleforwrestlingcontrolfromtheInnerCriticisnolessthanthebattlefortheself.Makenomistake:thestruggleisreal. Hereisthesimpletruth:

Tobecreative,youhavetosilencetheInnerCritic. BanishingtheInnerCriticiswhatweneedtodotoreclaimourcreativepower.

Reclaiming Creativity First,thebadnews:weeachhaveanInnerCritic,andtryaswemight,wecanneitherrunawayfromourInnerCriticnorcompletelydestroyit.TheInnerCriticisapartofourpsycheandbeinghuman. Don’tthrowupyourhandsindespair!Despiteallofthepsychologicalpowerthatitholds,theInnerCriticisreallyawayofthinking–aseriesofthoughts.Evenmoresimplyput,itiselectricalimpulsesinthebrain.Neuronsfiring.Chemicalsbeingreleasedandrecognizedbyreceptorsinthebrain.Justaswecanlearntocontrolourbreathing,wecanlearntohaveabetterhandleontheseprocessesinourbrainstobemoreincontrolofourthoughts,beliefs,andconsequentactions. Nowhere’sthegoodnews:ifwecanlearntoswitchoff(orattheveryleast,tonedown)theself-evaluation,self-judgmentandcriticism,andself-doubt,thenwecanactivateandlightuptheareasinthebrainassociatedwithself-expression.Wecancreatethespaceandlaythefoundationsforgettingintoourcreativeflow. Rememberthatchildfullofwonderandunfetteredcreativityatthebeginningofthechapter?That’syoudeepinside.Alsoinsideistheselfthatembodiesalloftheinherentpotentialyouwerebornwithandthatwillalwaysbethere:thecapacitiesyou’verealizedandthosethatyouhaveyettoactualize.Iliketothinkofthisasyourtrueself,yourCreativeSelf.Itexistedbeforethelayersofsocietalexpectationwereheapeduponyourshoulders,anditwillstandtriumphantonceyoushakeofftheshoulds,musts,andoughts.Thispartofyouiswhatyoustartedwith:completely



connectedtoyourownflowofideas,withaperspectiveontheworldwhichonlyyouhave,andanexperientialfilterthatcomprisesyourownuniquecreativity. ThisinherentCreativeSelfiskey.Itiswhatfillspeoplewithawewhenwitnessinganinspiredmusicalperformanceoragiftedathlete.Thiscompleteabsenceoffriction,self-doubt,andself-judgmententrancesandinspiresus.It’sbeautiful.TheircompleteexpressionoftheCreativeSelfgivesussomethingtoaspiretoourselves. DidyouknowthatthereisnowordintheTibetanlanguageforcreativityorbeingcreative?Theclosesttranslationis“natural.”8Inotherwords,ifyouwanttobemorecreative,youhavetobemorenatural,moreofyourself.However,theInnerCritictellsusthatonlyifwe’rehardonourselvescanwebecomethepeoplewe’remeanttobe.Thisisalie.Thepeoplewhowearemeanttobeareexactlywhoweare.We’remeanttobecomemoreofourselves–notcookiecuttercopiesofthosearoundus. YourCreativeSelfiswhereyourcreativepowerlies,thesourceofyourbrilliance.Thisisyourpowerfulself;itisyourbrainclickingintogearandactivatingthewonderfullycomplexnetworkthatishardwirednotonlyintoyourbrainbutyoursoul.TheCreativeSelftrustsitself,knowsitsstrengths,anddelightsinpushingitsboundaries.TheCreativeSelfisfarstronger,farmoreknowledgeable,andinfinitelymorecapablethantheInnerCritic.9WeneedtoreducetheInnerCritic’sinterferencesotheCreativeSelfcandowhatitdoesbest:creating. TheInnerCriticislikestatic,whiletheCreativeSelfisthestationyou’retryingtotuneinto.Wedohaveachoice:wedon’thavetolistentothestatic.BygivingtheInnerCriticlessofourbandwidth,weaccess,express,andcultivateourcreativity;wetakebackourcreativepower.Fromthisplaceofreclaimedcreativepower,wecangoafterevenbiggerchallenges. Reclaimingcreativityisanactofcourage:choosingtoactinthefaceofthefearthattheInnerCriticgenerates,andmakingaconsciouschoicetothinkdifferentlyinordertoaccessyourCreativeSelf. HowdowereachthisCreativeSelf?TryingtofixtheafflictionoftheInnerCriticwithitsowntoolsisnotgoingtowork.Youcan’tbully,threaten,orcoercetheInnerCritic.Itwrotethehandbookandknowsallofthetricks.No,wehavetouseatotallydifferentapproachtobanishtheInnerCritic. Withtraining,themindcanreplacedistortedpatternsofthinking.ToreleasetheInnerCritic’sholdonourcreativethinkingandaccesstoourcreativity,we’regoingtosetouttolearnnewapproaches,practices,andtools.Inthecomingchapters,we’lldiscovermuch-neededantidotestotheInnerCritic’sperniciousguisesofthefearofjudgmentandcriticism,beinghighlyself-critical,feelingdeficient,havingahabitofcomparison,anddenyingcreativity.

Areyouready?Let’sretrainourmindssothatwecanbanishtheInnerCritic,accessourCreativeSelves,andreclaimourcreativepower.



Notes:Chapter1–WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?1Kotler,Steven."FlowStatesandCreativity."PsychologyToday.AccessedDecember16,2016.https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-playing-field/201402/flow-states-and-creativity.2MihalyCsikszentmihalyi,Flow:ThePsychologyofOptimalExperience(NewYork:Harper&Row,1990),48-67.3Kotler,"FlowStatesandCreativity.”4Kotler,"FlowStatesandCreativity.”5AnneMcIlroy,"NeuroscientistsTrytoUnlocktheOriginsofCreativity."TheGlobeandMail.AccessedDecember16,2016.http://www.theglobeandmail.com/technology/science/neuroscientists-try-to-unlock-the-origins-of-creativity/article565081/.6McIlroy,"NeuroscientistsTrytoUnlocktheOriginsofCreativity."7Firestone,Robert,LisaA.Firestone,andJoyceCatlett.ConquerYourCriticalInnerVoice:ARevolutionaryProgramtoCounterNegativeThoughtsandLiveFreefromImaginedLimitations.Oakland,CA:NewHarbingerPublications,2002. 8DavidKelleyandTomKelley,CreativeConfidence:UnleashingtheCreativePotentialWithinUsAll(2013),6. 9W.TimothyGallwey,TheInnerGameofWork(NewYork:RandomHouse,2000),7.

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