APP writing standards file: James Year 1 high level 2wsassets.s3.amazonaws.com/ws/nso/pdf/9a91625f3373c...‘his problems turned into fears’ (AF1 L3 b1, b2 and b3). ... developed

1 of 18 The National Strategies ⏐ Primary Primary Framework for literacy and mathematics, James writing

QCA 00022-2009DWO-EN-01 © Crown copyright 2009

James Year 1 High level 2

Writing standards file



Narrative writing: An Amazing Egg

James’ writing was in response to a stimulus planned by the teacher. The oversized egg was ‘found’ in the school garden and after discussions on the ‘talkaround’ mat, a resource which helps children sit in a talk circle and focus on a particular object or artefact. The children wrote their stories independently.



Assessment commentary • Adverbial phrases as well as pronouns give variation to sentence openings, e.g. ‘Once upon

a time’, ‘On the way down’, ‘When’. Some variations in sentence length contribute to pace of story and create interest: ‘At the other side of the wall he heard a sound/he followed it/it was his mummy’. Most of the sentences used are simple or compound, with limited subordination. Consistent use of past and present tense (AF5 L2 b1, b2 and b3; AF5 L3 b2).

• Some use of full stops and capital letters demarcate sentences, although not consistently (AF6 L2 b2). Clause structure is correct, exclamation marks are used accurately and appropriately (AF6 L2 b1 and b3).

• Opening and closing of story signalled: ‘Once upon a time there was…’, ‘he decided he had enough of adventures’. Writing is sequenced logically, with a beginning, middle and end, i.e. actions have consequences and are followed through (AF3 L3 b2 and b3).

• Simple paragraphs collect related ideas together, and within them links are made through pronouns and adverbials, although movement between paragraphs is sometimes abrupt (AF4 L3 b1, b2 and b3).

• The writing includes some interesting use of repetition for emphasis, e.g. ‘run or stay run or stay’. Free indirect speech also gives insights into the character’s feelings: ‘Run he thought and he did’, ‘he decided he [had] had enough of adventures’. There is some elaboration of nouns and a varied choice of verbs, e.g. ‘cracked’, ‘popped’, ‘decided’. An overall point of view is shown through the use of comments on the events, e.g. ‘he wasn’t very confident’, ‘his problems turned into fears’ (AF1 L3 b1, b2 and b3).

• The story is written in a lively entertaining style playing on the conventional features of tales about lost baby creatures, e.g. the curlew runs away from his official rescuers. Readers implicitly share the main character’s emotions and motivations (AF2 L3 b1, b2 and b3).

• Vocabulary choices are appropriate and effective in conveying attitudes of character, e.g. ‘very confident’, ‘had enough’ (AF7 L3 b1 and b2).

• Spelling of many content words is either phonetically plausible or correct, e.g. ‘corner’, ’adventures’, ‘curlew’, with some errors in high frequency grammatical words, e.g. ‘know’, ‘when’, ‘didn’t’, ‘couldn’t’, and in some past tense inflexions, e.g. ‘turned’, ‘followed’, with phonetic approximations to others, e.g. ‘thought’, ‘blew’ (AF8 L2 b1 and b2).



Instructional writing: How to make a cheese sandwich

This writing followed from science and design and technology (DT) work as part of a topic on Food. The structure of an instructional text was discussed with the class prior to writing.

Assessment commentary • Repeated use of imperative verbs appropriate for succinct instructions (AF5 L2 b2 and b3).

• Grammatically correct clauses punctuated as sentences accurately demarcated with full stops. After a reminder, James was able to proofread his work to change lower case to capital letters (AF6 L2 b1 and b2).

• The instructions have a title and a logical end point (‘Eat your sandwich’). Numbering is used to organise and list ideas into an appropriate, workable sequence (AF3 L2 b1 and b2).

• Links between instructions are clear through the repeated references to ‘bread’, ‘cheese’, ‘sandwich’ (AF4 L2 b1).



• The writing is clear and to the point, without elaboration (AF1 L2 b1).

• Reference to ‘your sandwich’ and the instruction (invitation?) ‘Cut your sandwich into whatever shape you like’, suggests some reader awareness in an otherwise straightforward set of instructions (AF2 L3 b1, b2 and b3).

• Simple vocabulary appropriate for task with some variation, e.g. ‘slice of bread’/‘piece of bread’ (AF7 L3 b1).

• Clear letter formation with ascenders and descenders distinguished (Handwriting and presentation L2 b2).


Writing a recount based on ‘Tobias and the Angel’

This writing was produced following a school arts week, where the children visited a gallery then developed their own paintings and sculptures. The class looked closely at, and talked about different works. In this lesson, the class discussed ‘Tobias and the Angel’ from the workshop of Verrocchio. The picture was used as a starting point for writing. James worked alongside Ellen. They discussed important ideas in their story before Ellen painted and James wrote, as shown on the DVD. The class teacher offers an assessment of James’ development as a writer at the end of this sequence.



Assessment commentary • Sentence openings vary between pronouns and time adverbials in keeping with a recount of

main events (AF5 L2 b1). Mainly simple and compound sentences with some subordination (AF3 L3 b1 and b2). Past tense for narration and present for direct speech (AF5 L3 b3).

• Sentences are demarcated with capital letters and full stops (AF6 L2 b2), although there are points where commas and speech punctuation would help clarify meaning, e.g. in third section.

• The writing is organised in three sections related to the pictures. It is structured chronologically, following the actions of Tobias and the angel's mission of mercy (AF3 L2 b1).

• In each section, ideas are grouped according to content, linked pronouns and adverbials. Connections between the three sections are implicit only, based on assumed understanding of the story (AF4 L3 b1 and b2).

• Although brief, the writing is an imaginative interpretation of the picture, with relevant ideas included (AF1 L2 b1). The characters are not introduced or given motives, although the final sentence provides a wry suggestion about the angel’s attitude (AF1 L3 b3). Nouns are not expanded, but verb choice conveys descriptive detail, e.g. 'exhausted', 'being reluctant' (AF1 L3 b2).

• James adopts a simple recount structure, effective for saying what the picture is about. There is an attempt to use dialogue for humorous effect as well as to provide a pleasing ending (AF2 L2 b1 and AF2 L3 b3).

• Some of the words selected convey meaning precisely and economically, e.g. ‘relieved’, ‘exhausted’, ‘reluctant’ (AF7 L3 b2).

• Common high frequency grammatical words are usually spelled correctly as are common content words, e.g. ‘give’, ‘some’, ‘going’, ‘food’, ‘village’, ‘apples’. In some of his more ambitious choices, James makes attempts which are usually phonically plausible, although there are some mistaken grapheme choices, e.g. ‘tace’, ‘tuns’. Inflectional past tense ending not secure, e.g. ‘finishest’ (AF8 L3 b1, b2).

• Letters are generally correctly shaped and there is clear letter formation with ascenders and descenders clearly distinguished (Handwriting and presentation L2 b1 and b2).



Narrative writing: A Walk in the Woods

This was a piece of independent writing done towards the end of term, using an idea from the KS1 writing task bank about finding a magic pebble. There was minimal teacher input to the work beforehand.



Assessment commentary • In this first-person narrative, sentence openings are mainly 'I + verb', although some

adverbials of time vary the pattern. Sentences are mostly simple with occasional use of 'and' or 'when' to form compound or complex sentences (AF5 L2 b1 and 2).

• A few sentences are accurately demarcated with capital letters and full stops although punctuation is not consistent (AF6 L2 b2).

• The piece is organised chronologically with some time-related words highlighting stages in the action. There is a conventional opening, and the ending points towards a further episode (AF3 L2 b1 and b2).

• The story coheres around the actions and discoveries of the narrator, with constant reference to 'I'. Adverbials help to move the reader through the sequence, but paragraphs are not used (AF4 L2 b1).

• Content is simple, with some repetition, although word choices create interest (AF1 L2 b1 and b2). In the opening description and in the ‘night world’ section, elaboration of ideas through selection of adjectives and adverbs creates atmospheric effect (AF1 L3 b2).

• James uses many of the basic stylistic and organisational features of a simple adventure story, maintaining the first-person narrator. The intriguing hint at the end is perhaps a deliberate attempt at building the readers’ interest (AF2 L2 b1, b2 and b3; not quite AF3 L3 b3).

• Some repeated use of simple words (‘beautiful’, ‘shone’, ‘saw’, ‘was’), but others selected for effect (AF7 L3 b1 and b2).

• High frequency grammatical words and common content words are usually spelled correctly, some phonetic attempts also (AF8 L2 b1 and b2).



Visit to Middlesbrough Institute of Modern Art (MIMA)

The whole school went on the train from Glaisdale to Middlesbrough to visit MIMA. The following day the children in the Key Stage 1 class were asked to write a recount of their visit. Very little input was given apart from discussing favourite parts of the day. James worked independently.



Assessment commentary • Sentences generally simple in structure. Openings vary between ‘we’ and time connectives.

Past tense consistently used (AF5 L2 b1, b2 and b3).

• Straightforward sentences mostly correctly demarcated, one appropriately used comma (AF6 L2 b1 and b2).

• Time-related words and phrases sequence the material following the order of events. While there is no heading or title to introduce the recount, James makes a comment that rounds off the piece appropriately (AF3 L2 b1 and b2).

• Written as a single paragraph with ideas developed in order of happening, linked by time (AF4 L2 b1).

• Content is relevant to the purpose, with some expansion of detail and brief expressions of attitude (AF1 L2 b1, b2 and b3).

• James shows that he can use the main features of a recount to write about his visit to MIMA, using a straightforward, factual style (AF1 L2 b1, b2 and b3).

• Mainly ‘everyday’ vocabulary chosen (e.g. ‘went’, ‘wonderful’), with particularity shown in relation to the train journey (‘clambered on board’, ‘hearing the clickety clack of the wheels) (AF7 L2 b1 and b2).

• Spelling of high frequency grammatical function words and common single morpheme words usually correct, apart from errors in formation of adverb and adjectival suffixes with ‘ly’ and ‘full’. Also phonetically plausible attempts to spell some vowel digraphs ‘ea’, ‘oa’, ‘ou’ (as in ‘through’) (AF8 L3 b1 and b2).



My house

During the class theme on ‘Homes’, children went to the village to take photographs of the houses. When they got back to school they were asked to write a description of their house, as if they were trying to sell it to someone. They were asked to think of reasons why someone else would want to live in their house.

James worked independently, and self-corrected when asked to check his work.



Assessment commentary • James uses mainly simply structured sentences (‘It has…’, There are…’) to list the

attractions of his house, with ‘and’ as the most common connective, although there are examples of subordination (‘because’, ‘if’). He successfully controls the use of timeless present tense and modal verbs (AF5 L3 b1, b2 and b3).

• Sentences are accurately punctuated and there is some appropriate use of commas to divide clauses in a list. James’ corrections to the text show that he changed lower case to capital letters at the start of some sentences (AF6 L3 b1).

• The piece finishes with an appropriately persuasive, upbeat sentence, but there is not an equivalent opening. The two elements to the writing – some personally appealing features of the house, then the reasons for buying it – are not marked by any organisational device, such as space between the sections (AF3 L2 b1 and b2, some elements of AF3 L3).

• The text is internally cohesive in each section, linked by pronominal references to the house then to ‘reasons’ (AF4 L3 b2).

• James selects characteristics which a child of a similar age would find appealing about his house and expands these with adjectives that reinforce the persuasive intention (‘lovely’, ‘huge’, fascinating’), as well as providing precise details through the use of adverbial phrases (AF1 L3 b1, b2 and b3).

• The purpose of the piece is established cumulatively, reinforced in the final sentence with its pointed address to the reader. A number of features of an ‘estate agent’s blurb’ are used to effect (AF2 L2 b2; AF2 L3 b1 and b3).

• Vocabulary is precise (‘tile floor’, ‘tree house’, ‘special room for a train set’) and conveys appeal to a child reader (AF7 L3 b1).

• James spells many words accurately with some phonetically plausible errors in content words with vowel digraphs (e.g. ‘ie’ and ‘oo’) as well as errors in adding inflexion ‘ing’, and in the possessive form of ‘your’ (AF8 L2 b1 and b2).



Assessment summary

The evidence for James’ writing is based on a range of work from the summer term. He is taught in a mixed Reception, Year 1 and Year 2 class. The work is based on the Primary Framework units, including those on narrative and instructional writing. The collection includes cross-curricular examples.

James is a very able writer and is included on the school’s gifted and talented register for his literacy skills.

AF5 James is working within level 3 at AF5. He is using a range of connective words such as ‘and’, ‘but’, ‘so’, with some subordination with ‘because’/‘if’. He also uses adverbials to extend and link sentences. This enables him to vary sentence openings – and sentence lengths – in ways appropriate for the task and with the effect of engaging the reader, something especially evident in his narrative writing.

AF6 While James can use a range of punctuation in most of his writing, including some attempts at speech punctuation, his punctuation does not always make his meaning clear despite the grammatical accuracy of his clause structure. At times additional full stops or commas are needed to clarify his meaning. He is working at level 2 in this assessment focus.

AF3 James tends to produce better endings than beginnings to what he writes, suggesting that his ideas develop as he goes along. His writing is organised logically with actions having consequences and effects, although the main organising principle is chronology of events. Pieces tend not to have titles, assuming that the reader can contextualise as necessary. Level 2 awarded for AF3.

AF4 There is some evidence that James can write in paragraphs or sections, but mostly his writing is presented in a continuous block. There are clear cohesive links within potential sections, notably through the use of adverbials, but movement from one idea to the next is sometimes abrupt. The criteria for level 3 are not securely met for this assessment focus, so level 2 awarded.

AF1 James frequently selects his content imaginatively to interest and entertain the reader, e.g. his discussion with his teacher about Tobias and the angel confirms that he writes to amuse himself and the reader. He elaborates his ideas, sometimes by expanding on his nouns but more often through varied and interesting verb choices. In many pieces there is evidence of a particular viewpoint. Level 3 achieved for AF1.

AF2 James adopts the main features of several different genres of writing, taking on an appropriate style for each one. He also shows an awareness of the reader in what he writes, e.g. in his use




of repetition to establish the character’s state of mind in ‘An Amazing Egg’. However, the evidence is heavily weighted to narrative, and his teacher reports that James has still to ‘find his voice’ in non-narrative forms, although the piece about ‘My house’ shows promise. Despite having freedom to make choices about content and style, James is still learning the conventions of particular forms of writing and reproducing these within a supported context rather than making his own choices about the types of text to write. Level 2 awarded for AF2.

AF7 James demonstrates his ability for using effective words, and the choices that he makes add excitement and interest to his work. He is ambitious in his language choices. Level 3 awarded for AF1.

AF8 James spells high frequency grammatical function words correctly as well as common single morpheme words but not yet compound words or words with more than one morpheme. His errors are mostly phonetically plausible. Level 2 awarded for AF8.

Handwriting and presentation His handwriting is clear and legible, with ascenders and descenders distinguished and letters clearly orientated. There is as yet no joining. Level 2 awarded for Handwriting and presentation.

Making a level judgement

The L2/L3 assessment guideline sheet was used to assess James’ writing. There are ticks at L3 for AF5, AF1 and AF7, with assessments of L2 for AF6, AF3, AF4, AF2, AF8 and Handwriting and presentation.

Following the flow chart for making a level judgment in writing, it can be seen that James’ writing has fulfilled the requirements for level 2, as well as some of those for level 3. To refine the judgment further, consideration was given to the range, independence and choice shown in the work. James’ main strengths are in narrative writing and more evidence of his ability to compose and construct non-narrative texts, as well as to write on subjects of his own choosing would be desirable to support a judgment of level 3. The best-fit judgment was therefore considered to be High level 2.


Writing assessment guidelines: levels 2 and 3

Pupil name James Class/ Group Year 1 Date Summer term

AF5 – vary sentences for clarity, purpose and effect

AF6 – write with technical accuracy of syntax and punctuation in phrases, clauses and sentences

AF3 – organise and present whole texts effectively, sequencing and structuring information, ideas and events

AF4 – construct paragraphs and use cohesion within and between paragraphs

AF1 – write imaginative, interesting and thoughtful texts

AF2 – produce texts which are appropriate to task, reader and purpose

AF7 – select appropriate and effective vocabulary

AF8 – use correct spelling Handwriting and presentation

Level 3

In most writing:

reliance mainly on simply structured sentences, variation with support, e.g. some complex sentences

and, but, so are the most common connectives, subordination occasionally

some limited variation in use of tense and verb forms, not always secure

In most writing:

straightforward sentences usually demarcated accurately with full stops, capital letters, question and exclamation marks

some, limited, use of speech punctuation

comma splicing evident, particularly in narrative

In most writing:

some attempt to organise ideas with related points placed next to each other

openings and closings usually signalled

some attempt to sequence ideas or material logically

In most writing:

some internal structure within sections of text, e.g. one-sentence paragraphs or ideas loosely organised

within paragraphs/sections, some links between sentences, e.g. use of pronouns or of adverbials

movement between paragraphs/sections sometimes abrupt or disjointed

In most writing:

some appropriate ideas and content included

some attempt to elaborate on basic information or events, e.g. nouns expanded by simple adjectives

attempt to adopt viewpoint, though often not maintained or inconsistent, e.g. attitude expressed, but with little elaboration

In most writing:

purpose established at a general level

main features of selected form sometimes signalled to the reader

some attempts at appropriate style, with attention to reader

In most writing:

simple, generally appropriate vocabulary used, limited in range

some words selected for effect or occasion

In most writing:

correct spelling of: o some common

grammatical function words

o common content/lexical words with more than one morpheme, including compound words

likely errors: o some inflected

endings, e.g. past tense, comparatives, adverbs

o some phonetically plausible attempts at content/lexical words

In most writing:

legible style, shows accurate and consistent letter formation, sometimes joined

Level 2

In some forms of writing:

some variation in sentence openings, e.g. not always starting with name or pronoun

mainly simple sentences with and used to connect clauses

past and present tense generally consistent


clause structure mostly grammatically correct

sentence demarcation with capital letters and full stops usually accurate

some accurate use of question and exclamation marks, and commas in lists


some basic sequencing of ideas or material, e.g. time-related words or phrases, line breaks, headings, numbers

openings and/or closings sometimes signalled


ideas in sections grouped by content, some linking by simple pronouns


mostly relevant ideas and content, sometimes repetitive or sparse

some apt word choices create interest

brief comments, questions about events or actions suggest viewpoint


some basic purpose established, e.g. main features of story, report

some appropriate features of the given form used

some attempts to adopt appropriate style


simple, often speech-like vocabulary conveys relevant meanings

some adventurous word choices, e.g. opportune use of new vocabulary


usually correct spelling of: o high frequency

grammatical function words

o common single morpheme content/lexical words

likely errors: o inflected endings, e.g.

past tense, plurals, adverbs

o phonetic attempts at vowel digraphs


letters generally correctly shaped but inconsistencies in orientation, size and use of upper/lower case letters

clear letter formation, with ascenders and descenders distinguished, generally upper and lower case letters not mixed within words

BL

IE

Overall assessment (tick one box only) Low 2 Secure 2 High 2 Low 3 Secure 3 High 3



Next steps

James has made exceptional progress as a writer and will continue to benefit from the lively, cross-curricular, investigative approaches and the emphasis on talk, which underpin planning in his class. He needs to develop a wider understanding of the purposes and structures of non-fiction, non-narrative writing, something which suggests that the Primary National Strategies Year 2 units, e.g. on explanations, information texts and non-chronological writing will be valuable.

Through individual conferences and guided writing it will be important to encourage him to develop ways of signalling the overall structure of what he writes from the outset and, within texts, learn to use a range of punctuation commensurate with his underlying grammatical knowledge of sentence structure, possibly drawing on Year 3 and Year 4 objectives. More experience of reading his work aloud may help this development.


APP writing standards file: James Year 1 high level 2wsassets.s3.amazonaws.com/ws/nso/pdf/9a91625f3373c...‘his problems turned into fears’ (AF1 L3 b1, b2 and b3). ... developed

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