Abandon by Elana Johnson (Excerpt)

7/30/2019 Abandon by Elana Johnson (Excerpt)

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a possession novel

simon pulse

new york london toronto sydney new delhi


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Jag

1.

Secrets are hard to keepespecially i your girl-riend can read minds.

She shouldnt be a secret, Vi said, tossing

me a pointed look over her shoulder as she straightened the

blanket on her bed.

She is not a secret, I argued,she being my ex-girlriend,

Indiarina Blightingdale.

You did not mention her, Vi said, turning to ace me.

Until I asked you about herand I only asked you about

her because shes all you think about! By the end o her sen-

tence, she had started to yell.

I suppressed the desire to roll my eyes. Ive had other


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girlriends, Vi. Do I need to detail my relationship with each

one o them?

She narrowed her eyes as i she knew Id only had one

girlriendIndybeore her. Only the ones you still have

eelings or. Her voice echoed o the low-hanging rocks o

her bedroom and down the hall. No way everyone in the

hideout couldnt hear this conversation.

I do not have eelings or Indy. I deliberately kept my

voice low.

Vi curled her ingers into tight ists. Shes all you

think about. She cocked her head to the side, as i read-

ing my thoughts right now. I wondered i shed already

discovered that I used to have a schoolboy crush on hersister.

You dont have to listen i you dont like what you

hear, I shot back. And Im only thinking about her because

Im worried about where she is. Its been two weeks, Vi. I

swallowed back the ear that accompanied the thought o

Indy being dead somewhere. Only she knows whats hap-

pened in the Resistance while Ive been . . . gone.

Her sts unclenched, and she closed the space between

us with three steps. Where were you? You know, while you

were gone.

I thought about Indy. I remembered the way our eyes


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3

would meet across a crowded room. I thought about how she

knew exactly what I needed, and when.

Vi shoved me in the chest. Stop thinking about her.

Stop asking me about where Ive been. I stepped close

to her again, leaning against the archway as i it would lend

me strength to endure this argument.

Youre only worried about her because you still have

eelings or her.

Not true, I growled, our aces only inches apart. Im

worried about Thane, too, and I cant stand him.

Thanks a lot. She pushed past me, striding toward the

makeshit tech lab, where my brother Pace was standing in the

doorway watching us. So glad to know you hate my ather.You hate him too! I yelled ater her, reusing to give

her even an inch. She disappeared into the tech lab, and the

ght let my body. I retreated to the hole in the wall I called

a bedroom, but I couldnt gure out how to stop thinking

about Indy.

See, Indy and I had gotten together on my teenth birth-

day, almost two years ago. And not only because she was an

amazing leader in the Resistance. She wasnt hard to look at

either, you know?

Id been leading the Resistance or three years and didnt

have much time or girls. Sure, I antasized about Tythe


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Seer I had worked with to develop my voice talent. But Pace

had claimed her as his as soon as hed met her, and Id kept

my childish imaginations to mysel.

Indy, along with her brother Irvine, had come to a sur-

prise party Pace had planned or my birthday. Not that it was

really a surprise. Pace had to get special clearance to leave the

tech acility, and since our house was his permanent address,

I got the conrmation beore he did.

At my party shed sauntered up to me, slid her arm around

my waist, and put her hand in my back pocket. She smiled at

me and motioned with her head toward the backyard.

Like I wasnt going to ollow her. Id have ollowed her to

Freedom when she looked at me like that.Indy had to take her hand out o my pocket to go through

the back door, but I quickly caught it in my own. I was game

or whatever she had in mind.

We held hands as we walked toward the back hedge.

Indy looked killer under the summer moon. Her pink hair

shone uchsia, and her dark skin and eyes glowed in the

sot light. She wore low camoufage pants with a black tank

top that lited just enough to show a strip o bare skin. Her

hand was rough and warm in mine. It t just right, and

when she gave it a gentle squeeze, I couldnt even remem-

ber my own name.


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5

Happy birthday, Jag, she said.

I grinned like Id won the electro-sweeps instead o sur-

viving teen years without dying. Thanks, Indy.

So. We going back next week?

I guess, I said, shrugging one shoulder. She wanted to

talk about work? What next? The weather?

Jag, that thing you did with your voice last week was

cadence.

I shrugged again. I hated talking about my talents. Its not

like it actually took any special abilities to use them. They

were just part o me. I tried to nd her eelings, but I came

up blank.

Indy cut me a look rom the corner o her eye, a knowingsmile playing on her lips. Nice try, she said. She slipped her

hand out o mine and moved it up my orearm. Her bright

yellow ngernails traced a pattern near my elbow.

I tried not to shiver, but it didnt work. I couldnt blame

the weatherthe night was perectly warm. I wish I could call

on the wind to come cool me down.

I couldnt, so I choked out, What does that mean?

She slid her hand back to mine, and heat crept along my

skin wherever she touched. It means that I elt you looking.

Looking or what? I asked.

How I eel about you.


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I suddenly ound the hedge in the neighbors backyard

ascinating. Oh yeah?

Yeah. I blocked you out.

I glanced at her. How?

Something Irv invented. Nasty tech when you swallow

it, but ater that its dead useul.

Stupid Irvine. Hes orever inventing something to keep

the Thinkers out. Id always supported him, but now that I

couldnt use my empathic ability to nd out what this incred-

ibly hot girl thought about me? Not so much.

Indy traced her nails up to my elbow again. She took hold

o my arm and pulled me toward her. Lets walk, man.

Sure. I stued my hands in my pockets. She laced herarm through mine, and we walked to the ront o the house

and down the sidewalk.

I wasnt sure what to say. Id been on many excursions with

Indy, eaten dinner with her tons o times, seen her rst thing

in the morning ater shed woken up on my living room foor.

But now? Words ailed me. My imagination ran wild.

How her mouth would eel against mine. What she would

taste like.

Youre quiet or someone with a voice, she teased.

I grunted. Like I was going to screw anything up by

speaking.


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She removed her hands rom me and put a couple o

inches between us. So. I got a question or ya.

Whats that?

When are you gonna kiss me?

My mind went blank.

Its not like I wanted to get you alone so we could discuss

tactics. Her voice sounded ar away, like it came rom deep

within her throat.

Oh, well, I

Youre adorable, she said, stopping at the end o the

street under an orange light.

Heat rushed to my ace. Adorable was worse than cute.

Ty had called me that two weeks ago during our training ses-sion. I was still pissed o. I wasnt a puppy.

Take it back, I commanded with my voice control all

the way up.

She blinked, her eyes glassy, her jaw clenched. Then she

smiled. Ah. The tech doesnt work against your voice. Ill

tell Irv.

You do that, I said, striding back toward the house.

Youre an idiot, I scolded mysel. Here I thought Indy liked

me, but she was just testing tech or her brotherone o my

best riends and an amazing technician or the Resistance.

Jag! She caught up to me in a couple o steps and pulled


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on my arm to get me to stop. Wait. You havent answered my

question.

I glared at her. I am not a-reakin-dorable.

She threw her head back and laughed. The sound was all

wild abandon, and her throat looked mighty enticing. But she

took one look at my ace and sobered.

Leaning in, she smiled. No kidding. Youre reakin hot.

Youre

She stole my lame comeback with her lips. I orgot why I

was mad. Indy tasted like salt and apples. Her body was sot,

yet hard, against mine. Her skin elt electric, like the pleasur-

able buzz o tech, under my ngers.

When she pulled away, I could barely breathe.Hot, she said again, burying both o her hands in my

back pockets.

I didnt eel so hot when Gunner burst into the tiny hole I

called a bedroom and pulled me rom memories that elt like

they had happened two lietimes ago. Jag, shes here.

I didnt have to ask who she was. I ollowed him into

the corridor, both o us sprinting toward the common

chamber.

Indy, I called, searching or her pink hair. I recognized

some o my old team rom the Resistance. Their aces had


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hollowed. They looked like theyd been to hell and back.

Maybe they had been.

Indy? I asked. The crowd parted, and there she stood.

Jag. She moved toward me, and I was so cracking happy

to see her alive that I didnt notice the way she had her st

cocked back.


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Zenn

2.

The notication o Indiarinas arrivalreached me last. Im not gonna lie, Im

pretty sure Jag wanted it that way. I

always got assigned the worst scheduleone that would keep

me sleeping during the day and as ar rom Vi as possible.

That, and Id volunteered or the traveling team. Over

the past two weeks Id only been on the ground or our days.

Gunner and I spent a crazy-ton o hours fying hoverboards.

Wed hit the cities in the Southern Region rst since theyd

been under relaxed control during the past eight months or

breeding and talent recruitment.

The Thinkers there were receptive. Sot.


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Weak.

When Id touched down yesterday, Jag had immediately

assigned me to the arthest post during the third night watch.

I saw Vi or about an hour each day, always at meal times,

always with a group o people. Always with Jag.

Insider Tip #1: Always do what the boss says. This is how

you gain trust.

I let Jag rule over me. I let him think he was keeping me

and Vi apart. I let him believe I was crazy-mad about my

assignments. It wasnt like he modied them because o my

complaints.

I wasnt truly playing both sides anymore, and though Jag

and I werent exactly best riends like we used to be, I wantedto regain his trust. And so I endured my dicult schedule,

and hours away rom Vi, and anything else he mandated.

When the runner came to alert me o a group coming in

ast rom the west, I knew it was Indy. And that Jag would call

a meeting, never mind that my vision-screen read 2:53 a.m.

The runner, Saediene, kept a steady stream o chatter

coming over my cache. I let her talk, grunting in agreement or

providing one-word answers when she asked a question. The

closer we few, the tighter my stomach clenched.

Weve been waiting or Indy or weeks, Saediene said,

fying close to me and touching my elbow.


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I glanced at her, trying to gure out why she was grinning at

me in the middle o the night as we few toward the cavern that

doubled as a Resistance hideout. The system o caves was about

the size o my standard-issue house back in the Goodgrounds.

But it was underground. With rock walls that oozed water. All

things considered, I preerred standing guard in the middle o

the night and crashing during the day. That way I didnt have

to talk to people Id rather avoid. I didnt have to watch Jag

whisper with Vi and thread his ngers through hers.

Uh, yeah, I said, looking away rom Saediene. We

need to know the whereabouts o Thane Myers.

His last known location was the Goodgrounds, Saediene

said, her hand still on my arm. Same as Indys.Yeah, I conrmed. Thane was crucial to our survival.

We didnt need him on our side. Not with us. But we needed

him to act as Inormant on Director Hightower. We needed

his eyes and ears inside the Association o Directors. Without

Thanes inside surveillance, wed be crippled.

Sure, our Insiders included Starr Messenger. Shes reaky-

talented, but shes still a student. Trek Whiting is more expe-

rienced, but nowhere near climbing into the Directors back

pocket.

As Gunn liked to remind Jag, we needed Thanebadly.

The knot in my gut turned into an iron weight as soon


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as I landed outside the cavern, which was part o a series

o shallow mountains. The entrance was concealed by a rot-

ted tree stump that stunk like a million unpleasant things all

rolled into one. Despite Saedienes serious strong will, she

was only a wisp o a girl with long blond hair. She struggled to

push aside the stump beore strolling into the cave. I lingered

outside, relishing my last ew breaths o resh air.

I didnt really like being trapped underground. Fine, I

hated it. To me, there was nothing worse than sleeping in

a cagetalking, eating, breathing inside a box with one

entrance and no exit.

I squared my shoulders and took one last lungul o unre-

cycled air. I arrived in the main chamber just in time to seeIndy punch Jag in the mouth.

I couldnt help but smile.

Ten minutes later I sorta loved Indy or punching Jag. And

by loved I mean hated. The air in the cavern already reeked

o everyones breath and body odor, our stockpiled ood,

earth, metal, and murky water. Why not add some blood?

I didnt know why Indy had slugged himand I didnt

much care. O course Jag didnt oer an explanation.

Ater Vi had glared Indys ace o, and ater Pace had

bustled Jag down the hall to the inrmary, I escaped to my


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hole o a room, where somehow the stench had already per-

meated. I yanked my notebook o the crude shel and began

scribbling. Anger simmered under my skin. Communicating

with Jag would be simpler i hed get tted with implants.

But hes as stubborn as he is smart, and he wont allow a

technician within teen eet o him.

Everyone living in the cavern used their cache or conver-

sation. Jags voice echoed o the walls everywhere he went.

But now that an implantless Indy had arrived with her team,

talking out loud would become normal again. I sorta loved

her or that too.

Falling back into being Jags second-in-command came nat-

urally or both o us. I had hal a dozen items on his to-do listwhen I sensed someone coming down the hall. I tucked away

my anger, loosened the grip on my pencil, and pasted on my

Insider ace. Id gotten pretty good at thinking and eeling one

thing while portraying something completely dierent. Fine, I

was damn good at it. Id been doing it fawlessly or our years.

Besides, I knew who was standing outside my door. Hey,

beautiul, I said without looking up. Jag stop bleeding?

You sound tired, Vi said, ignoring my question.

I allowed mysel to look at her. The sight o her made me

ache. Because I could only look.

Not touch.


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Im always tired, I said. Vi wore a pair o mens jeans

that hung o her bony rame and a aded blue T-shirt. In the

wild we scrounged or whatever ood and clothing we could

nd. The Director o Mountain Dale donated some clothes,

I said. Nothings arrived yet?

A sparkle entered her eyes. Dont I look good in these?

She gestured to her outt.

Shed look good in anything. Or nothing. Absolutely. I

moved toward her as she took a tiny step into my cramped

quarters.

Zenn

Dont, I cut her o. I pretended to be someone I wasnt

in every relationship I had. I wouldnt ake it with her any-more. We didnt need a cacheor wordsto communicate.

She could read my every thought.

While my voice was more developed than my mind con-

trol, I could catch the gist o most peoples inner thoughts.

Especially Vis.

I ocused on the ground as I elt her inner confict, her

inability to make decisions, even simple ones. Id like to think

it was just a side eect o Thanes extreme brainwashing, her

crazy-controlled lie, or that making choices was a new thing

or her. But all that would be a lie.

Vi just sucked at making decisions. Especially hard ones.


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I love you, I whispered, looking directly into her eyes.

It is what it is. I cant change it. I dont want to change it.

I took a deep breath and prepared to say what I shouldve

said long ago. I cant change you, either. I dont want to. Not

anymore. I gathered her into my arms and was more than a

little surprised when she let me.

For the rst time since Jag had picked us up outside Free-

dom, I kissed her. I could lie and say it didnt mean anything.

But I was done lying. Kissing Vi was earth-shattering every

single

time.

The memory o her smooth, warm skin kept me sane dur-

ing those long hours on my hoverboard. The smell o her hairgave me energy to talk to one more Director, endure one

more sleepless night.

Id do anything or Violet Schoeneld.

She pulled away rst. I just came to tell you that Jags

ready to start.

I nodded, trying to bottle up my emotions beore any

more spilled out, revealing too much.

Vi traced her ngertips over my eyebrow. I love you,

Zenn Bower. She turned and walked away, leaving her next

words unsaid but screaming through my mind.

But I love Jag Barque, too.


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Jag

3.

Two weeks ago, the night Gunn and Ihad rescued Vi and Zenn, Gunn had

pulled me aside ater everyone else had

gone to their holes to sleep.

Starr Messenger gave me this. He held out a blood-

crusted chip. I havent been able to watch it, he said. My

wrist-port shorted out.

I didnt need a cracking wrist-port to watch a microchip.

Lets go see my brother.

Pace manned the tech development or the Resistance

in the second-largest cavern in the underground sae house.

Since Tys death I dont think hed slept more than a ew


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hours at a time. He hadnt said as much, but I knew. His eyes

told me things his mouth couldnt say.

When Gunn and I showed him the chip, he pulled out an

e-board. Lets see. From Starr, you say?

Shes the hot contact, I told him. Ive dealt with her

or years, I explained to Gunner. She used to send messages

every week.

Every week? he asked. For how long?

I shrugged. Three years? Close to that. I wouldnt know

every intricacy o Freedom without her.

Here we go, Pace said. The projection screen above the

e-board brightened with Starrs ace. Shed done something

unky with her hair. I liked it.Gunner, Starrs voice said, and it echoed weirdly rom

the projection. Im sorry about Trek.

I cut a glance at Gunn, who rowned. Thats what she

starts with? Trek Whiting?

Pace paused the vid. Trek is a genius, he said. Hes our

communications guru in Freedom.

Oh, sure, I said. Trek. Love him.

But Gunn did not. He wore a sour expression and rolled

his eyes. So the guy can alsiy a eed. Big deal.

But it was a big deal, whether Gunn liked him or not.

Whats with you and Starr and Trek?


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Shes my match, and theyre together.

Oh, well, I said, the pieces aligning. So you dont like

him.

Hes not my avorite person, Gunn conrmed. But Ill

deal. Keep going.

Pace started the vid again. Trek and I are still ully on

board with the Resistance. When you get somewhere sae,

make sure Jag Barque watches this.

I leaned orward as the camera cut away rom Starr. The

image vibrated and the screen went dark. One breath later,

a new stream started. This time the camera wasnt in Starrs

room.

Thats a laboratory, Gunner whispered.Where? I asked, scanning the long rows o counters in

the vid.

He didnt answer as the image zoomed in on one work-

station. A man sat on a high stool, a piece o tech clutched in

his hand. He wore a white coat, gloves, and a pair o protec-

tive goggles.

Whos that? I asked.

Dont know, Gunn said. Most o his ace is covered by

those glasses. The three o us leaned closer, anxious not to

miss a thing.

The mannot much older than Paceddled with his


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tech instrument. He glanced at the cameraright at it. My

name is Cash Whiting, he whispered.

Gunn jerked away rom the screen, and Pace paused the

vid. What? Pace asked.

Cash is Treks brother, Gunn said. Heswell, Raine

drained him and, uh, now hes dead.

I raised my eyebrows. She killed him?

No, no, Gunn said. Zenns report said Thane did.

Why dont I have that report? I asked.

Pace put his hand on my arm. You rescued Zenn two

hours ago, bro. Give him ve seconds to sleep beore he

downloads every report hes led in the past eight months.

Fine, I said. But no one gives me ve seconds to sleep.Pace smirked. I can give you some meds that will give

you as long as you want.

I waved him away. Where did Cash Whiting work? I

asked Gunner.

Evolutionary Rise, he said. Raine told me about an

Alias list. His name was on it, with Insubordinate behind it.

And Deceased.

I nodded my understanding as Pace restarted the vid. Cash

leaned over his station, and the camera showed his view, as i

it were perched on his shoulder.

A tray lay in ront o him. He poked at something liquid


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and pushed the end o his tech instrument. Blue dye seeped

into the tray, brightening little rectangles one at a time until

they were all showing.

Administration o DNA, Cash whispered. From some-

one with voice talent. He covered the tray and placed it in a

chamber at the back o the counter.

I sucked in a breath. I knew what the scientists did in the

Evolutionary Rise. Entire foors had been dedicated to creat-

ing genetic copies o talented people.

Whose? Gunner asked, his pale ace almost gray. Whose

DNA is that? There arent many voices in the world.

I knew what he was really asking: Is that my DNA?

I put my hand on his arm. I dont know.On the video an alarm rang, and we all jumped.

Time to see i Batch 4395 can support lie, Cash said,

almost like he was making a video journal or his scientic

records and not or us. Maybe he was.

The embryos have been grown in the dark, he contin-

ued. The temperature was kept two degrees below normal

standards. Theyve been starved o the DNA needed to create

a voice boxuntil they receive this application o DNA rom

Subject 261.

Cash removed the tray, and I leaned even closer to the

p-screen. Upon application, the embryos are warmed in an


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accelerator or three minutes and teen seconds. I lie is sus-

tainable, the blue dye will be purple, and physical evidence

o lie will be visible to the naked eye. Cash removed the lid.

He gasped.

I yelled.

Pace stumbled backward.

Gunner swore.

There, on the projection screen, purple overwhelmed

every other color. The embryos had already begun to grow,

the rectangles Id seen beore rounding into etuses, pushing

against each other and the edges o their containers.

Cash Whitings ace lled the screen. Fear lined his

eyes. This experiment is a success. Subject 261 will bebrought in or DNA donation. The army will be grown in

thirty days.

He glanced over his shoulder, and I saw the movement

in his throat as he swallowed. When Cash turned back, he

set his mouth in a thin line o determination. I will destroy

them, and all my notes. Starr, get this out to the right people.

I They can replicate my procedures, the Resistance will

never stand a chance.

The screen went dark, leaving only silence hanging over

everything.

Dammit, I said. I paced away rom the e-board and


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rubbed my hand along the back o my head. Starr spoke

again, drawing me back to the p-screen.

He destroyed them all, as well as his notes. He died

or his actions. Hightower has doubled the personnel in the

Evolutionary Rise. We dont have much time.

No kidding, Gunner said, his voice haunted and hollow.

I will be available to cache with you, Gunn, beyond the

wall, Starr continued. Trek will send Pace the coordinates

and times. Well keep you updated on any news rom inside

the Rises, especially the Evolutionary Rise. She looked down

or a moment. When she met the camera again, her eyes

sparked with power. We can still win this. Do not lose hope.

Then the screen went black. I blinked, and a violent shadeo purple imprinted on the backs o my eyelids.

Destroy it, I whispered.

Jag Pace said.

Destroy it, I repeated. I stood up straighter and pinned

Gunner and Pace with a glare. The three o us know. No

one else needs to be burdened. Well use this knowledge and

Starrs intel to our advantage, but we dont need to reak

people out.

Theyll quit, Gunner said, leaning against the stone wall.

Wont they? Theyll just quit i they think we cant win. I

they know how close They are to successul cloning.


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Yes, I said. No one breathes a word o this to anyone.

Am I clear?

You got it, bro, Pace said. He snapped the chip out o

the port and brought a rock down on it. The shards fipped

through the air.

I want Raine out o that city, Gunn said.

Its one o my top priorities, I said. But lets wait or

Indy to come in beore we go storming Freedom.

My jaw hurt. Indy packed a mean punch. I totally deserved

it, butow. I wanted to throw a wicked jab at her like I used

to when we were younger. Then wed end up wrestling and

laughing like we used to, and shed orget why she wanted tomurder me.

Like she used to.

None o that happened. Number one, we were too old or

that now. Number two, I let her behind without instructions

or the Resistance, and then I got mysel thrown into prison in

the Goodgrounds. Number three, Id taken her brothernot

herwith me, and neither o us had seen him since. Number

our, when Id returned to the Badlands seven weeks later, I

had a new girlriend. Number ve, the cavern was now lled

with people, and Indy and I needed privacy to say all that

needed to be said.


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And then there was the whole her-being-in-love-with-me

thing. I certainly couldnt encourage that.

Especially because o the whole Vi-glowering-in-the-

doorway-with-her-arms-crossed thing.

So Id taken my punch like a man.

That had happened a hal hour ago. While I was bleeding,

I had called an emergency meeting with my most trusted.

Indy and her team were now resting in the inrmarywhich

was really just a tiny cave with two cots shoved against the

wall. Our techs worked miracles in there, using whatever

supplies they could nd to make sure we all didnt die.

And, damn, Indy looked terrible. Her dark skin appeared

bleached and her hair did not. The truth? The pink was totallyaded. And she obviously hadnt been sleeping much.

Not that I could blame her or that. There isnt time or

sleeping.

So, Vi said, snapping me out o my Indy-ocused

thoughts. She was scowling. I kept orgetting that she can

see just about all my thoughts, including the ones about

Indy.

But i Indys gorgeousand she isshe still had nothin

on Vi. I tried to arrange my mouth into a smile when Vi

dialed her glowering down to a glare, but it hurt my throb-

bing jaw.


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26

So, Indy says Thane wasnt in the armhouse. I punctu-

ated the news with a deep sigh. Which isnt good.

Where is he? Zenn rubbed his eyes and blinked real ast.

Id woken everyone up in the middle o the night, but

Zenn had come o his watch. He looked pretty bad too.

Some things couldnt be helped. Gunn yawned, and his eyes

were bleary with exhaustion.

Id never actually gone to bed last night, so yeah. I didnt

eel sorry about waking them up.

My brother olded himsel into a chair next to me at the

rickety table. Is he dead?

Vi stiened at the mention o her possibly deceased dad,

and I threw Pace a shut-the-hell-up look. Way to be sensi-tive, bro, I said. We dont think Thane is dead. Indy says

there was plenty o blood in the armhouse, ootprints and

such, like someone carried him out. Just no body.

Director Hightower got him, Gunn said, real quiet-like,

the same way he says everything.

I dont think so, I said. No doubt he ordered Thane

to be collected, but the better bet is the Director in the

Goodgrounds sent a crew.

Whos there now? Zenn asked, sliding me a paper across

the table. I didnt even look at it. I couldnt stomach the sight

o his neat handwriting, detailing the teen billion things I


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had to do in the next hour. Sure, hed immediately taken his

place as my second-in-command, but come on. A list every

time I saw him? So unnecessary.

Director Shumway, Pace said. A real piece o work.

No wonder Indy and her team were all busted up, I

said, more to mysel than anyone else. Id heard o Shumway,

which meant he wasnt exactly on my side. Or even close to

crossing over.

Well need the whole group or this, Gunn said, pushing

himsel away rom the table.

Probably. But we can spare a ew hours, I think. My jaw

popped with every word. I rubbed it but still heard the click-

ing when I said, Let em sleep till ve.You got me up to say lets wait until ve? Pace grum-

bled as he stood to leave. I shouldve elt annoyed, but all I

could muster was a yawn.

I shouldve been more concerned, probably. The act that

Thane was MIA was about as bad as bad can get. Without

him, all we had was Starr, and she spent most o her time

in the Education Rise trying to gather intel without proper

codes and clearances.

I thought briefy that losing Thane might actually be a

good thing. I wasnt even sure he was who Gunn said he was,

and twelve years o hating someone doesnt just evaporate.


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28

Id ordered his location and pickup. That had to count or

something. Too bad the bleeder wasnt even there.

I cradled my head in my hands as Zenn let, huddled close

with Gunn. My to-do list stared back at me rom the table.

The top item?Assign interrogators for Indys team.

Which seriously needed to be done, but or the rst time

in a long time, I didnt want to be the one to do it.

Under that, Zenn had written, Get implants already.

Hell to the no. Id reusedover and overto have my

wrist ported up so I could see someones memories, or a

vision-screen enhancement layered over my perectly unc-

tioning sight. And getting an implant?

Never.I didnt want that tech up in my brain. No way did I want

someone to be able to contact me at any time about anything.

Or people to track my location just because I activated my

cache to tell Vi shes the most beautiul creature Id ever seen.

Id love to discuss the subject o implants, just so I can

convince you that Zenns right about them, Vi said, gently

putting her hand on my elbow and helping me stand. But

rst you need to sleep.

Im ne. I almost added babe like I used to. But Vi and

I werent quite back to that level yet, even though wed spent

nearly every waking moment together or the past three


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29

weeks. She was still stuck in her whole Zenn-loves-me-and-

has-saved-me-so-many-times loop. And our argument about

Indy hadnt been ully resolved yet.

Im ne. Besides, I have the Resistance to run.

Youre such a liar, she said. Lets go.

Jag, lets fy.

I jerked awake, my heart beating a rapid rhythm in my

chest. Gunn stood in my doorway, his ngers twitching in

anticipation. Cache convo with Starr.

I moaned. Raked my ngers through my hair, which elt

like wet straw. My eyelids scratched over my eyes. I needed

more sleepand a shower. Time? I asked as I pulled on myshoes.

Five orty-one, Gunn said. Starr said six teen. I let

you sleep as long as I could. Zenns lling everyone in about

Thane and Indy.

Perect, I said, though it was anything but. I liked Zenn;

I did. I just didnt like him anywhere near Vi.

Come on, Gunn said. She only has eleven minutes. He

let, and I scrambled ater him, hoping wed make it to the

sector in time.

We didnt. When we touched down near the southwest

wall o Freedom, Starr only had seven minutes let. She stood


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30

beyond the towering wall, in the gap between it and the tech-

tric barrierthe second and last deense keeping Freedoms

Citizens in and everyone else out.

When anything touched the barrier, an alarm shrieked.

Enorcement Ocers would then converge. The person

whod breached the wall usually didnt make it past the bar-

rier. The hundred-yard gap between the wall and the barrier

made sure o that.

But Trek used his wicked tech skills to bring down sec-

tions o the wall, so Starr could get out or these little chats

without detection.

Gunn and Starr each had a cache, a device implanted in

their minds they could use to communicate mentally, evenwith the barrier between them. Everyone had a cache in

Freedomwhich was why I would never get one.

Starr had a limited number o minutes away rom her

duties inside the city, and she didnt like it when we were late.

She was also one o the smartest people I knew. She could get

inside your head without even being in the same room.

Starr Messenger was true Thinker material. Shed been

my contact in Freedom or almost three years. Id only met

her a handul o times, but Id seen her ace next to her

reportssent like clockwork every week. She liked organiza-

tion and detailed lists and punctuality. So I didnt have to use


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31

my empathic ability to gure out she was raging mad that we

were late.

Not that I could hear her. Gunner didnt speak out loud

either. He just stood there, inches rom the techtric barrier,

gazing at Starr on the other side. At one point he raised his

hand, and she lited hers.

I elt the longing inside her. Guilt radiated rom Gunn.

Until terror fowed rom them both.

What? I asked Gunner. He didnt answer, just took a

step closer to the barrier. I he touched it, that alarm would

go o.

What? I asked again, trying not to control him with my

voice but rustrated I wasnt included in the conversation.I looked at Starr. Something erce glistened in her eyes,

making them shine like steel; power radiated rom her shoul-

ders. Yet ear kept the words silent. Well, that and the act

that I didnt have implants to hear her with.

What? This time I gripped Gunns arm to get his attention.

Director Hightower has Thane, Gunn said in his unnerv-

ingly sot voice. Hes using Raine to drain him. Tomorrow

morning, eleven a.m.


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Zenn

4.

The day Vi tapped on my windowchanged everything. Well, i were gonna

be all technical, and I guess we are, the

window tapping happened at night.

Which was why she got busted.

She was only twelve years old. The inraction didnt go

on her Ocial Record, but it tattooed itsel on my memory.

Vi shouldnt have meant anything to me. I knew her

because she lived six minutes away in the City o Water, and

we were in the same year at school. But our relationship

shouldnt have progressed past us being two kids who were

the same age.


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33

Id just turned thirteen, and Id just returned rom meet-

ing Jag Barque in the Abandoned Area. Id snuck in through

the back door, returned to my bedroom, and checked my alse

transmission eed when the tap, tap, tap landed on the glass.

My heart pounded in my scrawny chest.

Maybe Theyd been monitoring me. Maybe They knew

I wasnt listening to the transmissions. Id screwed up ater

only a ew days o helping the anti-Thinker movement. The

Resistance, my dad had called it.

Insider Tip #2: Dont hesitate. It shows weakness and indeci-

sion. Those who hesitate often have something to hide.

I took a deep breath and accepted whatever was gonna

happen. I strode to the window and yanked it up, expectingto see a Special Forces agent with glinting black eyes and a

ully charged taser.

Instead, I ound Violet Schoeneld. I could tell shed been

crying, even i the tears were already dried up. The ull moon

cast glimmers o white light in her brown hair.

Violet? I scanned the yard behind her. Empty. A hover-

copter foated along the edge o the Centrals, a couple miles

away.

Zenn, I She cast a quick glance over her shoulder.

Youre gonna be seen, I whispered. Climb up. I reached

out to help her but drew back beore we touched. That was


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34

against the rules, and the window was wide open so anyone

could see.

Violet used to answer questions in class, used to show up

to school with her panels done. She used to hang with the

other girls during breaks. Then her dad disappeared. Shed

withdrawn, and now that wed moved into secondary sub-

jects, she sat alone against the ence during breaks and hadnt

turned in homework or months. She didnt speak to anyone

except her sister Tyson.

I didnt even know she knew my name, let alone where I

lived. Maybe she was searching or any window that looked

like there might be someone awake within.

She struggled over the windowsill while I stood there andwatched. I couldve pulled up all ninety pounds o her with

one hand. She straightened, and I towered at least six inches

over her.

Her ace was the color o uncooked rice. Her eyes were

a mixture o blue and green, like the serene color o the

lake. Her brown hair fowed reely over her shoulders, but it

shouldve been secured in its customary ponytail or bun.

She was crazy-beautiul, even with tearstained cheeks.

And then it hit me: A girl was standing in my room. In the

middle o the night.

Id been away rom my transmissions or hours. My older


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35

brother had developed tech that could simulate sleep pat-

terns, but I wondered how Violet had managed to trick hers

long enough to leave her house.

Im sorry, she murmured. I shouldnt be here. She

paced next to my bed.

I glanced at my brother, a decent sleeper, teen eet rom

us. Its ne. I wanted to touch her shoulder, make her stop

walking. Her squeaky shoes were going to wake my brother.

Whats going on?

Nothing, she said.

Nothing? I repeated.

Ty told me . . . Its nothing.

I olded my arms. I its nothing, can you stop pacing?Youre gonna wake Fret.

She stopped and took a deep breath. Its my mom, she

whispered. She hates me or not being Ty. Violets voice

began to rush. And I just couldnt take it anymore. I had to

get out. Oh, its so late. She threw a glance at my bedside

clock, her eyes wild. Im going to be in so much trouble.

Youre sae here, I lied, wishing it were true. But my

smart house would rat her out i she didnt leave soon. Extra

body temperature and oxygen usage and all that.

Violet moved toward the window. Youll get in trouble,

she said, climbing out.


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36

Wait!

The hovercopter had already spotlighted her. The

mechanical voice shouted or her to reeze. I shrank back into

the shadows, terror thumping through my veins.

She sprinted toward the bushes in my backyard, but no

one escapes rom a hovercopter.

Like a coward, I slammed the window and drew the

blinds. I peeked through two slats, watching the Special Forces

agent interrogate her. She didnt cry. Her sts clenched and

unclenched, and she accepted the citation without a word.

The hovercopter zipped away, and thats when Violet

crumpled to the ground. Her shoulders shook with racking

sobs.Then I did what any thirteen-year-old boy would do: I

dropped the shades and crawled into bed.

Saediene Brown sat immediately to my right, rantically

writing a report or Jag. Though we were the same age,

she reminded me o mysel when I rst began serving the

Resistance. Shed joined a month ater Id arrived in Freedom.

In act, Saediene had been my rst recruit or the

Insiders.

She nished writing, olded the paper, and put her hand on

mine. I shook my thoughts away rom Vi and that rst night in


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37

my bedroom and jerked at the contact rom Saediene. She

pulled her hand back and hid it under the table. Her eyes fick-

ered to mine, a small smile playing on her ace.

Zenn? she said, still watching me. Just like everyone else

was doing.

Indy and her team are drinking protein like theres no

tomorrow, I said, stung my hand in my pocket as I stood.

My skin elt hot where Saediene had touched me. Theyll

be on mandatory rest this week, and then well get them into

rotations or duties.

I nodded toward Pace, who stood and started droning on

about some new tech hed invented that would eliminate the

squealing in new implants. When Thane had rst brought mebeyond the wall o Freedom to this cavern, Id barely recog-

nized Pace.

The smile that used to come quickly to his lips now took

longer. His eyes were dull, and Paces long, silver hair didnt

get washed enough, but I suspected that wasnt the only rea-

son or its lackluster appearance.

When Tyson Schoeneld died, a big piece o Pace Barque

did too. Id been present when shed been killed, but the

memories o those weeks are shrouded. Id been brainwashed

and medicated, with only moments o lucidity.

Thane had told me the story o Tys death. It had aged


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38

him too, though I didnt comort him. The rst time I saw

Pace here in the hideout, though, I had gripped him in a hug

that said more than Were on the same team.

It had said, Please forgive me. I did what I thought was right.

I miss Ty too.

Hed understood, and hed reely given his orgiveness

something Jag sucked at doing. I watched Pace now and

noticed hed revived a bit since Jags return. I was reminded

o when I rst joined the Resistance, when Pace and Jag

would embrace ater months apart. Theyd laugh about

Irvines seriousness and throw wads o paper at Indy as she

snored on the couch.

I longed or the more careree days o the Resistance, whenthe thought o battling the Thinkers only happened in our

imaginations. It was easier then to eel like They were robbing

the general population o their ree will. Id believed in the

cause o the Resistance with my whole heart. No one should

have to conorm to a job, a marriage, a lie they hated simply

because someone with persuasive powers deemed it so.

So the Resistance ought talent with talent. They had

Thinkers. So did we. They had voice talent. So did we. They

also had vastly more personnel, many and diverse ways to

nd our strongholds, and untold resources.

We had Jag Barque.


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39

Back beore I turned Inormant, me, Pace, and Jag would

sit around the kitchen table in Jags house, making grand plans

and playing cards. Sure, we ran minor missions, sent messages,

and attended training in Seaside with Vis older sister, Tyson.

Ty had the unique ability to make you think you were the

most important person in the world. Vi had worshipped her.

Id rescued Ty rom the Goodgrounds, helped her through

the desert to the Badlands, and passed her o to Jag. Pace had

been there, and I still remember the rst time he met Ty.

I was younga ew months shy o ourteenand res-

cuing Ty was my rst solo mission or the Resistance. But I

recognized the light on Paces ace. Id seen my dad look at

my mom with that brightness that said, The person standingin front of me could change my life.

As Pace spoke now, here in this dingy cavern, it was clear

that his easiness had been lost with Ty. He caught me watch-

ing him, and I hal smiled. He seemed to understand what I

was thinking and lowered his head slightly.

Ater Pace nished his update, Vi stood up and began

assigning every member o Indys team to one o our existing

crew. I imagined how I must look, gazing at Vi the same way

Pace had looked at Ty all those years ago. I couldnt help it.

Someone to show them around, help them on watch,

you know, orient them to our lie here, she said.


42/42

And what a crazy-lame life we live inside this blasted cav-

ern. I didnt say it out loud, but Vi cut me a hard look anyway.

Ater Vi sat, Saediene got to her eet. Gunner and I

have assembled new two-person traveling teams or assign-

ments in the Midwestern Region. Youll leave tonight. She

listed o partnerships, and I glanced at her when she read my

name with Gunns.

Another trip to another unknown city. Hal o me

rejoiced. The other hal died a bit more.

Beore Saediene nished her assignments, Jag burst into

the cavern with Gunn two steps behind him.

Cancel everything, Jag commanded. Hightower has

Thane, and we need to rescue him beore eleven tomorrowmorning.

Abandon by Elana Johnson (Excerpt)

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