21C-Emotional Intelligence

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCEEMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE

Norma Meek and Patty SchumacherNorma Meek and Patty SchumacherSenior AssociatesSenior Associates

Yale School of the 21Yale School of the 21stst Century Century

Emotional Emotional IntelligenceIntelligence

E - IQE - IQ

Industry - BusinessIndustry - Business

High IQHigh IQ CriticalCritical CondescendingCondescending InhibitedInhibited Uncomfortable Uncomfortable with with sensualitysensuality

Emotionally Emotionally blandbland

High High Emotional Emotional

IQIQ PoisedPoised OutgoingOutgoing Committed Committed to people to people and causesand causes

SympathetiSympathetic and c and caringcaring

ComfortablComfortable with e with themselvesthemselves

IQ contributes only IQ contributes only about 20% to success in about 20% to success in

lifelife

Other forces contribute Other forces contribute to successto success

Emotional Emotional IntelligenceIntelligence

LuckLuck

Social ClassSocial Class

Emotional IQ has 5 Emotional IQ has 5 componentscomponents

Self awarenessSelf awarenessManaging emotionsManaging emotionsMotivating ourselvesMotivating ourselvesEmpathyEmpathyResolving conflicts/handling Resolving conflicts/handling relationshipsrelationships

EI TESTEI TEST1. You are on an airplane that suddenly hits extremely bad turbulence and 1. You are on an airplane that suddenly hits extremely bad turbulence and

begins rocking from side to side. What do you do?begins rocking from side to side. What do you do?A.A. Continue to read your book or magazine, or watch the movie, trying to Continue to read your book or magazine, or watch the movie, trying to

pay little attention to the turbulence.pay little attention to the turbulence.B.B. Become vigilant for an emergency, carefully monitoring the stewardesses Become vigilant for an emergency, carefully monitoring the stewardesses

and reading the emergency instructions card.and reading the emergency instructions card.C.C. A little of both a and b.A little of both a and b.D.D. Not sure - never noticed.Not sure - never noticed.

2. You are in a meeting when a colleague takes credit for work that you 2. You are in a meeting when a colleague takes credit for work that you have done. What do you do?have done. What do you do?

A.A. Immediately and publicly confront the colleague over the ownership of Immediately and publicly confront the colleague over the ownership of your work.your work.

B.B. After the meeting, take the colleague aside and tell her that you would After the meeting, take the colleague aside and tell her that you would appreciate in the future that she credits you when speaking about your appreciate in the future that she credits you when speaking about your work.work.

C.C. Nothing, it's not a good idea to embarrass colleagues in public.Nothing, it's not a good idea to embarrass colleagues in public.D.D. After the colleague speaks, publicly thank her for referencing your After the colleague speaks, publicly thank her for referencing your

work and give the group more specific detail about what you were trying work and give the group more specific detail about what you were trying to accomplish.to accomplish.

Note: Note: The purpose of the following quiz is to provide you with an introduction to The purpose of the following quiz is to provide you with an introduction to Emotional Intelligence (EI). The results you get from this quiz are NOT a Emotional Intelligence (EI). The results you get from this quiz are NOT a comprehensive picture of your EI and the quiz is NOT representative of Hay Group comprehensive picture of your EI and the quiz is NOT representative of Hay Group surveys. If you are interested in testing and developing your EI, you should contact surveys. If you are interested in testing and developing your EI, you should contact us at 617 425 4500 for information on our us at 617 425 4500 for information on our Emotional Competence Inventory, a tool , a tool designed to be administered by accredited users only. designed to be administered by accredited users only. http://ei.haygroup.com/resources/default_ieitest.htmhttp://ei.haygroup.com/resources/default_ieitest.htm

http://ei.haygroup.com/products_and_services/content_ECIandSS.html

3. You are a customer service representative and have just gotten 3. You are a customer service representative and have just gotten an extremely angry client on the phone. What do you do?an extremely angry client on the phone. What do you do?

A.A. Hang-up. It doesn't pay to take abuse from anyone.Hang-up. It doesn't pay to take abuse from anyone.B.B. Listen to the client and rephrase what you gather he is feeling.Listen to the client and rephrase what you gather he is feeling.C.C. Explain to the client that he is being unfair, that you are only Explain to the client that he is being unfair, that you are only

trying to do your job, and you would appreciate it if he trying to do your job, and you would appreciate it if he wouldn't get in the way of this.wouldn't get in the way of this.

D.D. Tell the client you understand how frustrating this must be for Tell the client you understand how frustrating this must be for him, and offer a specific thing you can do to help him get his him, and offer a specific thing you can do to help him get his problem resolved.problem resolved.

4. You are a college student who had hoped to get an A in a course 4. You are a college student who had hoped to get an A in a course that was important for your future career aspirations. You have that was important for your future career aspirations. You have just found out you got a C- on the midterm. What do you do?just found out you got a C- on the midterm. What do you do?

A.A. Sketch out a specific plan for ways to improve your grade and Sketch out a specific plan for ways to improve your grade and resolve to follow through.resolve to follow through.

B.B. Decide you do not have what it takes to make it in that career.Decide you do not have what it takes to make it in that career.C.C. Tell yourself it really doesn't matter how much you do in the Tell yourself it really doesn't matter how much you do in the

course, concentrate instead on other classes where your grades course, concentrate instead on other classes where your grades are higher.are higher.

D.D. Go see the professor and try to talk her into giving you a Go see the professor and try to talk her into giving you a better grade.better grade.

http://ei.haygroup.com/resources/http://ei.haygroup.com/resources/default_ieitest.htmdefault_ieitest.htm

5. You are a manager in an organization that is trying to 5. You are a manager in an organization that is trying to encourage respect for racial and ethnic diversity. You encourage respect for racial and ethnic diversity. You overhear someone telling a racist joke. What do you do?overhear someone telling a racist joke. What do you do?

A.A. Ignore it - the best way to deal with these things is not to Ignore it - the best way to deal with these things is not to react.react.

B.B. Call the person into your office and explain that their Call the person into your office and explain that their behavior is inappropriate and is grounds for disciplinary behavior is inappropriate and is grounds for disciplinary action if repeated.action if repeated.

C.C. Speak up on the spot, saying that such jokes are Speak up on the spot, saying that such jokes are inappropriate and will not be tolerated in your organization.inappropriate and will not be tolerated in your organization.

D.D. Suggest to the person telling the joke he go through a Suggest to the person telling the joke he go through a diversity training program.diversity training program.

6. You are an insurance salesman calling on prospective clients. 6. You are an insurance salesman calling on prospective clients. You have left the last 15 clients empty-handed. What do you You have left the last 15 clients empty-handed. What do you do?do?

A.A. Call it a day and go home early to miss rush-hour traffic.Call it a day and go home early to miss rush-hour traffic.B.B. Try something new in the next call, and keep plugging awayTry something new in the next call, and keep plugging awayC.C. .List your strengths and weaknesses to identify what may be .List your strengths and weaknesses to identify what may be

undermining your ability to sell.undermining your ability to sell.D.D. Sharpen up your resume.Sharpen up your resume.


7. You are trying to calm down a colleague who has worked 7. You are trying to calm down a colleague who has worked herself into a fury because the driver of another car has herself into a fury because the driver of another car has cut dangerously close in front of her. What do you do?cut dangerously close in front of her. What do you do?

A.A. Tell her to forget about it-she's OK now and it is no big Tell her to forget about it-she's OK now and it is no big deal.deal.

B.B. Put on one of her favorite tapes and try to distract her.Put on one of her favorite tapes and try to distract her.C.C. Join her in criticizing the other driver. Join her in criticizing the other driver. D.D. Tell her about a time something like this happened to you, Tell her about a time something like this happened to you,

and how angry you felt, until you saw the other driver was and how angry you felt, until you saw the other driver was on the way to the hospital.on the way to the hospital.

8. A discussion between you and your partner has escalated 8. A discussion between you and your partner has escalated into a shouting match. You are both upset and in the heat into a shouting match. You are both upset and in the heat of the argument, start making personal attacks which of the argument, start making personal attacks which neither of you really mean. What is the best thing to do?neither of you really mean. What is the best thing to do?

Agree to take a 20-minute break before continuing the Agree to take a 20-minute break before continuing the discussion.discussion.

Go silent, regardless of what your partner says.Go silent, regardless of what your partner says. Say you are sorry, and ask your partner to apologize too.Say you are sorry, and ask your partner to apologize too. Stop for a moment, collect your thoughts, then restate your Stop for a moment, collect your thoughts, then restate your

side of the case as precisely as possible.side of the case as precisely as possible.


9. You have been given the task of managing a team that has 9. You have been given the task of managing a team that has been unable to come up with a creative solution to a work been unable to come up with a creative solution to a work problem. What is the first thing that you do?problem. What is the first thing that you do?

A.A. Draw up an agenda, call a meeting and allot a specific Draw up an agenda, call a meeting and allot a specific period of time to discuss each item.period of time to discuss each item.

B.B. Organize an off-site meeting aimed specifically at Organize an off-site meeting aimed specifically at encouraging the team to get to know each other better.encouraging the team to get to know each other better.

C.C. Begin by asking each person individually for ideas about how Begin by asking each person individually for ideas about how to solve the problem.to solve the problem.

D.D. Start out with a brainstorming session, encouraging each Start out with a brainstorming session, encouraging each person to say whatever comes to mind, no matter how wild.person to say whatever comes to mind, no matter how wild.

10. You have recently been assigned a young manager in your 10. You have recently been assigned a young manager in your team, and have noticed that he appears to be unable to make team, and have noticed that he appears to be unable to make the simplest of decisions without seeking advice from you. the simplest of decisions without seeking advice from you. What do you do?What do you do?

A.A. Accept that he "does not have what it take to succeed around Accept that he "does not have what it take to succeed around here" and find others in your team to take on his tasks.here" and find others in your team to take on his tasks.

B.B. Get an HR manager to talk to him about where he sees his Get an HR manager to talk to him about where he sees his future in the organization.future in the organization.

C.C. Purposely give him lots of complex decisions to make so that Purposely give him lots of complex decisions to make so that he will become more confident in the role.he will become more confident in the role.

D.D. Engineer an ongoing series of challenging but manageable Engineer an ongoing series of challenging but manageable experiences for him, and make yourself available to act as experiences for him, and make yourself available to act as his mentor.his mentor.


Answers to QuizAnswers to Quiz1.1. Not D, 10 pts. for ABCNot D, 10 pts. for ABC2.2. B – 5 pts. D – 10 pts.B – 5 pts. D – 10 pts.3.3. B – 5 pts. D – 10 pts.B – 5 pts. D – 10 pts.4.4. A – 10 pts. C – 5 pts.A – 10 pts. C – 5 pts.5.5. B – 5 pts. C – 10 pts. D B – 5 pts. C – 10 pts. D

– 5 pts.– 5 pts.6.6. B – 10 pts. C – 5 pts.B – 10 pts. C – 5 pts.7.7. C – 5 pts. D – 10 pts.C – 5 pts. D – 10 pts.8.8. A – 10 pts. A – 10 pts. 9.9. B – 10 pts. D 5 pts.B – 10 pts. D 5 pts.10.10. B – 5 pts. D – 10 pts. B – 5 pts. D – 10 pts.


Children are not born with Children are not born with social skills; they must social skills; they must

learn them.learn them.

IF CHILDREN ARE NOT BORN WITH IF CHILDREN ARE NOT BORN WITH SOCIAL AND EMOTIONAL SKILLSSOCIAL AND EMOTIONAL SKILLS

WHAT CAN EDUCATORS DO TO STIMULATE THESE WHAT CAN EDUCATORS DO TO STIMULATE THESE SKILLS IN THE CHILDREN IN OUR SETTING?SKILLS IN THE CHILDREN IN OUR SETTING?

ADDING THE TOOLS TO THE TOOLBOX

• CLEAR COMMUNICATION

• EMPATHY• SELF AWARENESS• DECISION MAKING• PROBLEM SOLVING• SHARING• PATIENCE• LISTENING

• CARING• GETTING ALONG WITH

OTHERS• GENTLENESS• PERSEVERANCE• SELF MOTIVATION • SELF CONTROL

EDUCATING THE HEART IS AS IMPORTANT AS EDUCATING THE MIND

• EACH MORNING HAVE A COMMUNITY/FEELING CIRCLE-how do you feel and why?

• READ STORIES TO EMPHASIZE THE TOOLS

• TELL YOUR OWN STORIES TO ENHANCE THE TOOLS

• CHILDREN ROLE PLAY CHARACTERS IN THE STORIES

CHILDREN NEED THE E.I. TOOLS TO BE

SUCCESSFUL IN LIFE

• USE MUSIC TO BUILD SELF-ESTEEM, ENHANCE EXPRESSION, SPUR MOTOR DEVELOPMENT, STIMULATE LISTENING & RECEPTIVE LANGUAGE

MORE CLASSROOM STRATEGIES

• PEER MEDIATION

• DEEP BREATHING—EXHALE, HOLD 2 SECONDS-INHALE

• YOGA

E.I. IS THE SET OF ABILITIES THAT HELPS US GET ALONG IN LIFE WITH OTHER PEOPLE IN ALL KINDS OF SITUATIONS—Maurice Elias,

Rutgers U.

• Lessons on hurtfulness of “put downs” followed by discussion of “put ups”

• Classroom plan on handling feelings—think rather than react aggressively

MORE CLASSROOM STRATEGIES

• Community service

• Care of classroom pets

• Cooperative learning groups

OUR THOUGHTFUL TEACHING, CONVERSATION, MODELING & PRACTICE CAN DEVELOP & NURTURE E.I. IN OUR

CHILDREN

• CHILDREN WHO ARE AROUND ADULTS WHO MODEL GENTLENESS,PERSERVERANCE, LISTENING, TEAMWORK & APPRECIATION OF DIFFERENCES SET HIGHER STANDARDS FOR THEMSELVES

• EDUCATORS NEED TO PROVIDE WORKSHOPS FOR PARENTS ON DEVELOPING THE EMOTIONAL AND SOCIAL INTELLIGENCE IN CHILDREN.

ADULTS NEED TO MODEL GENTLENESS

• Sometimes nonverbal, supportive actions are all that is needed in the situation

• Don’t say – “it’s not as bad as that”– “big girls don’t cry”– “boys don’t cry”– “it didn’t hurt”

THE BEST HOPE OF A NATION LIES IN THE PROPER EDUCATION OF ITS CHILDREN--

Erasmus

• SOBERING REALITY OF COLUMBINE AND OTHER SCHOOLS HIGHLIGHT THE NEED FOR EDUATION OF THE EMOTIONS—the answer does not lie in metal detectors

• DO YOU AGREE SELF CONTROL, GETTING ALONG WITH OTHERS, PERSEVERANCE, & SELF-MOTIVATION ARE AS IMPORTANT AS IQ IN DETERMING OVERALL LIFELONG SUCCESS?

• WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN YOUR EDUCATION SETTING TO ENHANCE THE E.I. OF THE CHILDREN?

21C-Emotional Intelligence

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