2 Interpersonal InterpersonalLISTENING Fast Facts About Listening We listen at 125-250 wpm, think at 1000-3000 wpm 75% of the time we are distracted,

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InterpersonalInterpersonal

LISTENINGLISTENING

Fast FactsAbout Listening

We listen at 125-250 wpm, think at 1000-3000 wpm

75% of the time we are distracted, preoccupied or forgetful

20% of the time, we remember what we hear

More than 35% of businesses think listening is a top skill for success

Less than 2% of people have had formal education with listening

The Erratic Driver

Story: Doug Fielding, a prominent NY State Legislator was picked up on the County Road #10 for erratic driving last week. A concerned citizen spotted the dangerous driver first and notified a patrol car in the area. They picked up his trail and followed him for two or three miles to gather evidence of his driving techniques. While they were following him, he speeded up to 85 mph, dropped back down to 40 mph, passed the driver ahead of him, cutting into the passing lane too close in front of oncoming traffic, pulled back into his former lane, cutting off the driver he had just passed. He also went off the road two times on each shoulder. When the hazardous driver was pulled over to the side of the road and stopped, he refused to take the Field Alcohol Indicator test, claiming legislative immunity. “Besides,” he said, “I’m not drunk. I’m just preoccupied thinking about a seminar I’m helping run today at Finger Lakes Community College.

ListeningListening::

“the process of receiving, constructing meaning from, and responding to spoken and/or nonverbal messages.” p. 175

Functions of Interpersonal Functions of Interpersonal CommunicationCommunication

1. Meet our social needs

2. Maintain our sense of self

3. Fulfill social obligations

4. Exchange information

5. Influence others

6. Get and improve our jobs6

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Listening is Fundamental in Communication

• “Listening creates Reality.”

• Enacts, develops, and maintains a variety of social & personal relationships.

• Most of our time is spent Listening.

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Listening

Listening makes up 42-60% Listening makes up 42-60% of our communication.of our communication.

WritingSpeaking Reading

Percentage of Communication Training

Mode of Communicat

ion

Formal Years

of Training

Percentage of Time Used

Writing 12 years 9%

Reading 6-8 years 16 %

Speaking 1-2 years 30%

Listening 0-few hours 45%

HearingHearing

A physiological activity that occurs when sound waves hit our eardrums

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Listening vs. Hearing

Hearing- physical process; natural; passive

Listening- physical & mental process; active; learned process; a skill

Listening is hard!

You must choose to participate in the process of listening.

Listening involves:Listening involves:Attending

Understanding

Remembering

Evaluating

Responding

A – U – R – E – R

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Define --- Attending?

AttendingAttending

Get physically and mentally ready to listen.

Make the shift from speaker to listener a complete one.

Hear a person out before you react.

Adjust to the listening goals of the situation.

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UnderstandingUnderstanding – – Accurately decoding the Accurately decoding the message you share with the message you share with the speaker.speaker.

Determine the organization

Attend to nonverbal cues

Ask questions

Silently paraphrase16

Paraphrase the following statements to Paraphrase the following statements to reflect both the thoughts and feelings reflect both the thoughts and feelings of the person speaking.of the person speaking.

1. “I really like communication, but what could I do with a major in this field?”

2. “I don’t know if Pat and I are getting too serious too fast.”

3. “You can borrow my car, if you really need to, but please be careful with it. I can’t afford any repairs and if you have an accident, I won’t be able to drive to D.C. this week-end.”

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RememberingRemembering

Repeat information

Create mnemonics

Take notes

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MnemonicsMnemonics

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A technique used to aid memory – take the first letter of a list you are trying to remember and create a word

HOMES (the five Great Lakes) Huron, Ontario, Michigan, Erie, Superior

A – U – R – E – R

Note TakingNote Taking

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Take notes when you

are listening to

complex

information.

Key-word outlineMain pointsSupporting evidence

Evaluating Evaluating (Critical Listening) (Critical Listening)

Fact – a verifiable statement

Inference – a conclusion drawn from facts

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You are Listening CriticallyYou are Listening CriticallyWhen you question whether the

inference is supported with meaningful factual statements

When you question whether the reasoning statement that shows the relationship between the support and the inference makes sense

When you question whether there is any other known information that lessens the quality of the inference

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RespondingResponding - - communicating communicating attention and interestattention and interest

◦Let others know you are interested.

◦Give vocal responses.

◦Show that you care about the other

person and what he or she says.

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Guidelines for Guidelines for ListeningListeningBe fully focused on what is

happening.Adapt listening skills and style to

accommodate differences in listening purposes and individuals.

Remember that listening is an active process and you must invest energy and effort.

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We can think much faster than another person can talk. What can we do with all that extra thought time if remembering is important?

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