10 tips to teach prayer

When I was first getting into ministry a mentor

of mine told me that the chief responsibility of

any minister was first and foremost to teach

people how to pray.

At the time I thought that was odd. I had always assumed that ministry was more about the more public elements: preaching sermons, organizing worship, meeting with people in need, and studying the Bible.

As time has gone on I have realized more and

more that there was a lot of truth in that

statement. As people learn to pray they are able

to encounter God in profoundly personal ways.

One who prays does not only know God through

the words of the preacher, or the lessons of the

teacher, they know God through their own

encounters with Him.

Prayer is a central part of the Christian life and

helping people to learn how to pray is a ministry

that all baptized people are called to participate

in.

In teaching people

how to pray we are

joining in the

ministry of Christ,

who taught his

disciples to pray by

giving them the "Our

Father.”

But how DOES one teach others to pray?

There is no single method that works. No two

people are alike. My two year old prays quite a

bit differently then the High School students I

used to teach about prayer, and I pray

differently then both.

People pray differently at different points in

their lives and at different stages of

development. Not only that but there are

hundreds of methods, and none of

them work well with everyone. I know in my own

life my prayer methods have changed many

many times.

I have picked up a few tricks here and there.

Here are 10 tips that I have picked up over the

years.

One of the most important things to do when teaching

others to pray is to pray yourself. If you aren't doing it, it will

be hard to make others believe that they should too. Having

a regular prayer life can help keep the conversation honest

and open. Prayer also allows you to invite God into the

process.

The best lessons I have ever learned in prayer were not

learned in classrooms, but in the lived experience of praying

regularly with my mentors. If you have a regular prayer time,

adoration slot, liturgy of the hours practice, or rosary group

(as well as any other prayer group or time you might be a

part of) invite people to join you. When you are with the

person you are helping teach to pray, pray regularly. Pray,

pray and then pray some more.

I think about this idea nearly every

day. There have been times in my life

I have wanted to be a spiritual

athlete, trying to pray every form of

prayer .... it doesn't work. No one can

do it all. Encourage students to set

realistic goals in their prayer life and

help them connect to the forms of

prayer that have particular

resonance with the student.

I love to pray the Liturgy of the Hours, but after teaching it to

scores of people, I have found that many have not found it

to be as life giving as I have. It is important not just to be

able to introduce people to the kind of prayer that

you personally find effective, but to help them navigate to

other forms of prayer that might be meaningful for them in

other ways. Many times people

ask for help with their prayer

when what they know no longer

seems to work. Giving people

new prayer tools can rejuvenate

a prayer life that has stalled out.

Where you are teaching an individual or a group about prayer, try to keep it interesting. Prayer is something that is living and active. Tell stories about prayer and talk about your own personal experiences with it. If there are illustrations or demonstrations that might bring home a point use them!

For a long time in my life prayer was a duty, not a

privilege. I thought God would get mad at me if I

didn't pray and I would beat myself up when I got

bored, sleepy, or distracted. This changed for me

when someone told me that each time I got

distracted from the prayer to

count it as a blessing because

it gave me the opportunity to

return to God in love. Like a

parent teaching a child to walk,

God finds all our steps a joy, no

matter how shaky.

Sometimes prayer can be exciting, refreshing, and bring

new life. At other times, however, prayer can seem dead and

lifeless. This is normal. Many of the great saints throughout

history have experienced times of dryness and difficulty in

their prayer life. The consensus among the fathers of the

church is that this is normal and even

healthy. Just because God seems

distant does not mean that God is

distant. Let students know that

these times will come, and that

they don't mean something has

gone wrong, but that God is

working in them in a new way.

Prayer is a habit hard to form and easy to lose. I have heard

it said that prayer is like a wild bird. Forming a prayer habit

is like putting the bird in a cage... it takes a long time to do,

and if the door is open even for a moment the bird will fly

out again. As difficult as maintaining a prayer habit might

be, it should be encouraged.

Prayer's power often is felt

over months and years of

regular practice rather then

in the individual prayer times

themselves. The longer I have

prayer the more I have learned

this to be true.

Like anything that requires a lot of discipline, a prayer habit

can be more easily formed with others. Having another

person or group to pray with is very helpful. Help students

find a group that they can pray with, and find a certain

degree of responsibility in. It

might be with you, or it might

be with others, but helping

someone feel like they are

responsible to others for their

prayer life can be a great boon.

A rule of life is a contract that a person makes with themselves. In it they lay out a plan for how often they will do the things they hope to do. They may want to pray the rosary every day, attend mass once a week, meet with a spiritual director one a month, and have a retreat once a year. A Rule of Life can be anything. Encourage them to keep it manageable and to stick with it. If they find it to difficult have them go back and change it to something they can do, but encourage them to hold to the standards they set for themselves.

So there you have it... 10 tips.

These are certainly not the only tips

on teaching people how to pray, but

they're a start. Not every setting will

be conducive for all 10 of them.

If a few of them don't work in a

particular setting don't worry to much

about it, you can always adapt these

to fit your own needs. You may also

add or subtract from the list.